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SELF-CARE BINGO FOR WOMEN OVER 50 · Uncluttered and Unfiltered: The Podcast For Women Over 50

1:22
Welcome to Uncluttered and Unfiltered, the podcast urging
1:25
you to let it go and don't look back, with nationally acclaimed
1:30
professional organizer Christine Stone and self-proclaimed Hot
1:34
Damn Mess radio and TV personality Eden Kendall.
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Welcome everyone to UNCLUTTERED and UNFILTERED with the podcast
1:42
for women over 50. I'm Eden Kendall.
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Christine Stone is here. She's a professional organizer.
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And we are going to always try to include a little something
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something about organizing in every episode.
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But this one is more about just taking care of yourself from a
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perspective of actually being willing to be.
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And I hate to use the word selfish, but self fulfilling
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maybe? I don't know what the word would
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be to say I think. I don't think selfish, I think
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just honoring yourself by taking care of yourself.
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Before we get into that though, there are a couple of things
2:16
current event wise that we wanted to talk about.
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We will get to our self-care bingo momentarily, but the first
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one, I'm seeing a lot of buzz about it.
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I have not gotten excited to watch it.
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Maybe you can change my mind. It's a series, right?
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Love story The John. John F Kennedy junior Carolyn
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Bessette love story. Love story.
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All right, so this we already know has a tragic ending.
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Oh no. But that's the funniest part of
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this. So I didn't start watching it
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until like a week ago. Because when you've lifted,
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you're like, I mean, it's going to be not true because how do
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they really know what happened when they're alone, you know?
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But then everyone kept talking about it and talking about I'm
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like, OK, I'm going to watch it. OK.
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I have to say, it does suck you in.
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I mean, yeah, because the music is amazing that they put to it.
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All the 90s music. Oh, the clothing is fabulous.
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They reenacted every bit of clothing that she wore.
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They were. They made New York City look
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like the 90s again. I mean, it just, it really is
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nostalgia. And now I can kind of see why
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everyone's in the 90s nostalgia thing.
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Yes, by watching it, it's like, OK, you added a lot of fluff to
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this, but that's because I think we lived it.
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Now here's the funniest thing. People in their 20s I see go
3:43
online and they're like, I'm going to watch.
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I'm going to tape my boyfriend watching this.
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And he told me, don't tell me how it ends.
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And I was like, is this a joke? Like they don't understand how
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it ended. Now we have Google, we have AI.
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You would think they would be able to look up sure how it
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ends. Or it kind of starts with the
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plane crash. That's how the first episode
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starts. So, you know, that's kind of how
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it is, but I find it hilarious because they act like this is
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super, super real. Every bit of it is real.
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They're all buying her clothes and her headbands and her shoes
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and her everything. Like they are just wanting to be
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Carolyn Bessette and I am just finding humor and all.
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She was very beautiful. Stunning.
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And I mean, it is such a tragic story because her sister was
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with her as well in the plane crash when John F Kennedy
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Junior's plane that he was flying went down and.
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We're not spoiling anything. We're not spoiling anything by
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saying that. If you have paid any attention
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over the last. To history. 25 years.
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So the the crux of it is, though, the way the 90s are
5:04
coming back is what you're saying is, is what's so
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entertaining here to see because Gen.
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Z is really getting their first exposure to this socialite,
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right? And and quite honestly, there
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that that kind of fashion wasn't as appreciated.
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I don't think back in the 90s by the hoi polloi, if you will.
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I mean, this was for the very, very rich.
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But now people are looking at it and saying, wow, that looks
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beautiful. It's.
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Well, from an organizer's point of view, and someone who's only
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worn black, white, neutral forever, that's what she wore
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was black, white neutral and or a red long jacket or a leopard
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jacket. But those were coats, you know
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what I mean? So for everybody to go, I just
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want to go neutral. I just want to be like her.
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I just want to really. I am laughing.
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What you're really saying is you want to be like Chris?
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Yes, you. Want to be like me because
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everything she wore was very simple, neutral, not a lot of
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jewelry, very minimal jewelry and she just wore hair down.
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It wasn't always polished and perfect and I just think it's
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hilarious that everyone's trying to copy somebody which by the
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way, no one and I mean no one could ever be Carolyn beset to
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me she was one in a million and that's probably why he wanted
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her so bad because she emulated that one in a million feeling.
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But but everything, even the what the wedding was last
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weekend or last week and that was a whole thing.
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So it's still unfolding. They didn't release all the
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episodes yet, no. No, once a week.
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And I think that's also what's captivating everybody because
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they can't wait for the next week to see what she's going to
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wear, how they're going to get along.
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And the whole fight in the park that they had, they recreated it
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identically because they had the footage so they could recreate
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it. And it's just so.
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And Daryl Hannah spoke out, said the whole thing's a lie.
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None of that ever happened. Wait, tell me again, Daryl
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Hannah's she dated she. Dated at the time or six years
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and they're saying the relationship overlap, but she's
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saying it didn't you know, they make her out to be this ditzy
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drug addict and she's like, I've never done that in my entire
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life. And you know, so she's like,
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I've had a this is all a bunch of lies.
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Yes, I've seen a lot of counter. Yep, storytelling.
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Yep, as this is unrolling, so I'm starting to get interested.
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You're get you're hooking me. You had me at 90s music.
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Oh great. Music and the outfits for sure.
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So this does. I'll have to check in with my
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daughter and see if she's watching.
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Oh, I'm sure she is because both my daughters got me into it.
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I wasn't watching it because I'm like, I know how this ends.
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I. Know I don't like a stats story.
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You know, also, you know, like it's one of those like when
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Princess Diana died, you remember when John F Kennedy's
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playing and they couldn't find him in the search when it was
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tragic it. Was the year. 1999.
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Okay. July, I mean, and I was home,
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young kids watching TV. It was a big deal just to see
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this all come up and people only seeing it as this truly
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romantic, which you know, in real life.
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Of course. I don't know if it.
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Was poetic. You know, they took poetic
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justice with that. So right, so that's definitely
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something you have to watch. But I was laughing so hard.
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I love my 20 somethings, I really do.
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But when they said don't tell them how the story ends, I'm
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like. It's like Titanic, leave it
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intermission because it was going so well for everybody.
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Exactly so anyway. Oh my goodness.
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OK, the other the other show business related thing that you
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and I traded texts back and forth about this week was Rachel
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Ward, who starred in The Thorn Birds, which was a mini series
9:13
back in the day. And then she was in Against All
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Odds. And she was a very.
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Beautiful actress that always played the romantic lead.
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And she was always the sexy. Sexy and romantic.
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Like every man was in love with Rachel Ward, especially after
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Against All Odds. Well, she has not cared at all
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about maintaining that image. I find her to still be very
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beautiful, but she lives on a farm now.
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Yeah, she does not color her hair.
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She doesn't do anything. She doesn't wear makeup, she
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doesn't do anything, nothing. And.
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She's getting a, pardon me, a lot of shit.
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About it a lot, A lot. Like mean, mean, mean stuff,
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saying, you know, how could you let yourself go like that?
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You're so ugly. And finally she had to respond.
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And that's that tick tock I think it was that I sent you.
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And she was like, I live on a farm, I'm a farmer.
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Horses and goats don't care. They don't care what I look
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like. Nobody does because I live alone
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with my husband out on a farm in the middle of nowhere.
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So why would I spend time and money when this is not my life
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anymore? I'm not in entertainment
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anymore. I haven't been in a movie in a
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million years. You know what I mean?
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Yeah. And she said for people to be so
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concerned about my life and how I look is very bizarre.
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I continually get these pictures in my feed of women looking
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their age. God forbid a woman looks her
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age. Now I don't want to be a
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hypocrite. I will drink any serum you put
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in front of me. That's.
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Going to prevent me from looking my age.
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So that would be just a lie if I said we should all look her age.
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But when a woman does look like she's aged 30 years in the last
11:13
30 to 40 years, you get all of these people saying, Oh my gosh,
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what happened to her? And then you have the other
11:19
people that want to take up for how dare you.
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Isn't a woman allowed to age? And I'm like, why are we having
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this battle? Everyone can choose.
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What they want? To do how they want to do it,
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they. Also did that to the woman who
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was on Dynasty Linda. Linda Evans.
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Yeah, they did that to her. And her circumstance was kind of
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the same. She lived out in the middle of
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nowhere on a farm. She had horses and all, and she
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was like, if you're not in the spotlight anymore, like I lived
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on a farm, just so you know. So if you ever want to come
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visit me on my farm, I would not color my hair.
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I would not wear makeup. I wouldn't do anything.
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Why? Because you're not.
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That's your. Life, I don't believe you.
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I swear to God, now I need to go get a.
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Farm, get a farm and come see me with your Gray roots.
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It wouldn't be where I'm talking, I would think.
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I would cut my hair short, white, no makeup because you're
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only with your animals and I don't think.
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Animals ask. About what you're doing or who
12:19
you They just want to be fed. That's all they want in my
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opinion. Or walked, or run or whatever
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you do with them. No, I think I part of me
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believes you and part of me is like, OK, that would be such
12:30
culture shock. That like a dream in reality.
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In reality, sure. I mean, you don't think about
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that. If I never had to be on a camera
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or do any social media or I was retired and I didn't have any, a
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little. I think every woman feels that
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way. I definitely see that upside.
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And I think too, that as many times as I replay our friend
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George Brescia, the fashion icon who once told us when you go out
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in public, you're not invisible. Even if you're not on camera,
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you're you're at Publix or whatever and you run into
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someone and you're hiding, ducking behind milk or whatever.
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Because what you don't really want is for someone to walk away
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and go. She looks sick.
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She looks, you look tired. But I'm telling you, if you run
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into me in Publix, I'm not going to have my lashes on.
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Not I'm gonna be wearing a baseball.
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Public square, I don't know anybody.
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I'll even travel like 10 minutes further just to go to a public
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if you know, when you're not feeling like, Oh yeah, I don't
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want to talk to anybody. I don't want to see anybody.
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And Publix, for some of you guys listening, don't have that.
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That's our grocery store chain, very big in the South.
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And I know that we have listeners all over the world.
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So we should say, yeah, we don't mean public going out in public,
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we mean going to Publix. With a grocery store, so I'll
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avoid it sometimes or I'll go to like a store.
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Nobody goes to some little small grocery store just to pick up a
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few things when you're just not in the mood to, like, be seen.
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It's a social event because. Exactly.
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Both of us live in little pockets within our big city.
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And typically you see all your kids, parents, kids, friends,
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parents everywhere. So it's it's it's just one of
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those decisions you have to make.
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Like, OK, I'm going out in public.
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One thing I did learn from you is I do feel a little bit better
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throughout the day if I at least try to put myself together a
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little bit. And I feel like you would, even
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if you were on a farm and you were just tending the goats, I
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think you would still have a nice, beautiful ponytail.
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I just do. I just think you are the kind of
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person that would want to feel put together even if no one was.
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Around to see it. We'll never know.
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We'll just but. It's a dream.
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It's OK. Well, enjoy.
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We're going to we're going to agree to disagree on what you
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would do if you had a farm. If I'll be a farm lady.
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But now it's time to get into this topic, which is self-care
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Bingo. So we from the very beginning
16:50
have had a sponsor and they are called Hearts for minds.org.
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It is a nonprofit, but they have we have been very aligned with
17:00
them. I just hosted A pickleball
17:02
tournament with them and it was a lovely affair.
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Cheryl Johnson, the founder of Hearts for Minds, was on our
17:09
show explaining that she founded the organization after her son
17:15
passed away from he had mental health issues and he eventually
17:21
bought some drugs that had fentanyl, fentanyl in him, in
17:25
them. And they had been doing the the
17:28
battle to destigmatize mental health for years.
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And that's really the goal of this organization.
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Among the many things though on their website, which is a very
17:38
informative website is self-care bingo.
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And every month they release new bingo card and everybody's
17:45
encouraged to decide how they want to do it.
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Do you want to fill in the card? Do you want to try to make a
17:50
line across it but to pay attention to what you're doing?
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So I'm pulling up marches self-care bingo card and I'm
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going to tell you what the squares are.
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And then of course, in our ladies only uncluttered and
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unfiltered Facebook group, we'll post the bingo card so you can
18:05
play along. But I want to go through these
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and find out if you would do or have done these things yet.
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And March has only just begun, right?
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Spring clean a small place space.
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That's a given. That's a given.
18:19
Yeah, because I've already done it.
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But let's talk about how that is considered self-care.
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You have said for years. Absolutely, that is.
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To me. Your home is your tranquility,
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your peaceful space, and if it's full of clutter, full of clothes
18:35
you hate, full of things, you're surrounding yourself that you
18:38
don't really like, that you don't want to keep it, that it's
18:41
just too much, you're overwhelmed.
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Yes, I think that's self-care, taking one area at a time.
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Right now, I just finished spring cleaning my closet
18:51
because we live in Florida and we get warmer weather earlier.
18:54
But it just felt so amazing to get rid of a lot of stuff that
18:59
either I wasn't wearing, I didn't like, whatever it was.
19:03
And I definitely think anytime you pick one area and declutter
19:08
it, it's going to make you feel better.
19:12
OK. And you know that's there.
19:13
You got your organizational nugget.
19:15
Start with a small area and we're going to go down.
19:18
So this is still in the B column for the window.
19:21
Read a new book. You know I don't read books I
19:23
know you didn't read, but I know you do.
19:25
Read I do I listen to them, I say I read them.
19:28
I that's a whole, whole controversy, but I say I read a
19:32
book, but I've really just. Listened to it well, I.
19:34
Don't. I've consumed a book.
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The thing is, I can start a book, but then I get busy and
19:39
doing other things and I feel like it takes me forever to read
19:43
a book. So when we were reading books, I
19:46
was. Like for the show?
19:48
Yeah, but that's because you showed me how to do it.
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I didn't even know how to listen to books in my car.
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Remember You showed me that whole thing.
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This is called. Learning.
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Always be learning. Always be learning.
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Drink only water all day. You've had days where you've
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coffee, but coffee and water I've done.
20:06
Drink water all day. You know what?
20:08
I start it and then I have to pee all the time and then I end
20:11
up stopping it. But it is so good for you.
20:13
Like when I do it I feel so good and I can tell in my skin and
20:18
everything, but it's so hard when all you're doing is peeing
20:21
all day trying to find the next bathroom anyway.
20:24
I'm sure there are physicians, and I've heard them say this,
20:27
that you can condition yourself and if you do this regularly,
20:31
you won't have that reaction. But I'm with you.
20:34
I still have, I still have the same issue.
20:36
You do write a poem. You're not going to do that.
20:40
I'm not going to do that. Would you do it?
20:42
I love to write a poem, but does it have to be like back in the
20:45
old days when we had to write haikus like or is?
20:48
It like a. Is it worth rhyming?
20:51
Like is it a rhyme? What do you prefer?
20:53
I would say a rhyming poem. I think that would be fun.
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I would do that. I would do a rhyming.
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I could see. You doing for sure I just now
20:59
today that's going to get me thinking because now I'm going
21:02
to think of a poem to write. OK, you can perform it like a
21:05
rap. Yeah, on our podcast, do a
21:08
puzzle or Sudoku. I do my puzzles every day.
21:11
So that's me. I do the New York Times puzzles.
21:13
I do Strands Connection, Wordle, the Mini, and the MIDI
21:19
crosswords every day. Oh, my gosh.
21:22
I'm impressed. Thank you.
21:24
Yeah, I don't I. Sometimes if I'm feeling
21:26
especially squirrely, I'll do pips.
21:29
Oh, see, I don't do any games. I mean, I used to love to do
21:33
puzzles and we did puzzles during COVID, but I really don't
21:40
play games. I used to do a lot of word
21:42
search in college. I can sit with a word search
21:45
book. I feel like technology has just
21:48
made me like. Why do these on my phone but I.
21:52
Guess I could try, I don't know. Well, you don't have to.
21:55
I mean, this is just a good. Suggestion this.
21:57
Is just a bingo card you know maybe you'll go across instead
22:00
of down. That was just be down.
22:01
OK, now we're over to I sleep 8 hours 3 * 3 nights in a row.
22:07
Three nights in a row of eight hours of sleep.
22:09
Oh, I could do that easily. So could.
22:11
I I mean easily. That wouldn't even be self-care,
22:13
that'd be my everyday life. For some people though, they
22:17
don't treat themselves to that kind of rust, so I can see where
22:20
that would. Be self-care.
22:21
And by the way, since daylight savings time, all these doctors
22:25
were coming out and saying a lot of people suffer from heart
22:27
attacks and illnesses during this week change because it
22:33
messes with your arcadian rhythm, circadian rhythm,
22:37
whatever that is. And so that's why they're hoping
22:40
that they stopped doing this back and forth.
22:43
People get more car accidents this week.
22:46
So I definitely think when you mess with your sleep, it messes
22:50
with everything. Good good notes.
22:54
Donate three items you don't use.
22:57
Once again organizing coming into the self-care category.
23:02
And I would say once you start with the three, you'll move on
23:06
to 567. So yes, I definitely think
23:10
clutter is part of looking at yourself care and how you treat
23:15
not only your closet, your home, everything, your garage.
23:19
When you have to look at clutter messes all the time, it just
23:23
causes stress and anxiety. Box breathing.
23:29
Have you done this? Box breathing that's I think if
23:32
I have this right, it's when you breathe in for a certain amount
23:35
of time, hold it for a certain amount of time, let it out for a
23:38
certain amount of time, and then nothing.
23:40
So it's like in a. Box.
23:41
Wait. I just hold my breath.
23:43
I'm dizzy. OK.
23:43
What? Breathe in.
23:44
I can't remember. It's 4 seconds or 7 seconds.
23:47
You breathe in, you wait, then you breathe out.
23:51
You wait, you breathe in. It's a breathing.
23:53
It's intentional breathing. No, it's.
23:55
Taking I probably should though. Meditate for 30 minutes.
24:00
OK, I'm going to be honest here. I have tried to meditate really
24:03
hard. I mean, really, I really tried
24:05
to make an effort. You have to block everything
24:08
else out when you're meditating. And I for the life of me could
24:12
not do that. Like, it would start out good
24:15
and then I'd start to think, oh God, I forgot.
24:17
I have to put the chicken out on the counter to defraud, you know
24:21
what I mean? I fall asleep when I do it.
24:23
If I do like a guided meditation and I'm listening to something,
24:27
I will fall asleep. I would like to really learn.
24:30
I would too, I think. There to meditate.
24:33
There are people who swear my brain.
24:35
OK, so one more on this particular list.
24:38
Bake something from scratch. I believe you are someone who
24:43
I'm not a Baker. I'm a cooker.
24:45
I like to cook, but I'm not big into baking because I don't eat
24:49
a lot of sweets. So no, I'm not into baking
24:53
something. I wanted to learn to bake
24:55
sourdough bread, but it was like more than three things I needed
24:58
to do. And I'm like, I just no.
25:01
OK, moving on now we are BIN. This is the NN row.
25:05
Celebrate a small. Win Oh, I think that would be a
25:09
good. Yeah, I like that.
25:10
One too. I I really like that one.
25:12
The next one, I do love this one.
25:14
Delete an app that stresses you out.
25:17
I think that's very good A. Very good one.
25:19
There are so many. There are so.
25:20
Many out there that we don't need.
25:24
Not only that, you don't need them and they're taking up so
25:26
much memory on your phone and you don't realize it until you
25:30
start deleting some of them. And when you're looking at your
25:33
phone trying to find an app you like, I now have to.
25:35
The only way I can find apps on my phone is by searching like
25:39
alphabetically. Watch a documentary.
25:42
Well, that's easy. That's easy.
25:43
That's you. And it is relaxing, in my
25:45
opinion, to watch. I agree, and the Wilder the
25:48
better. Oh yeah.
25:49
For sure. Reconnect with someone.
25:52
That's actually my New Year's word was family, which is
25:56
reconnecting with friends and family.
25:57
So reconnecting with someone, that is a form of self-care.
26:01
Well, I think that's a form of self-care also because so many
26:05
people are lonely and just starting to reconnect and get
26:08
out there again. Really mentally, mental health
26:12
wise, it does you good. OK, moving on to the next row,
26:15
Call a loved one. Very similar sentiment.
26:17
Call a loved one that's certainly self-care.
26:21
Learn more about hearts for mind connect.
26:25
I love that that is where they on the hearts for mind website.
26:30
They have mental health resources, right?
26:33
Which is so important. So important, even if it's not
26:35
for yourself, just to know where to go to find these kinds of
26:39
things within your own community, right?
26:41
You never know when. You're going support groups.
26:43
I mean so many things. Have a social media free day.
26:48
I think that's the best thing you could do for your mental
26:51
health, honestly. Lock your phone up.
26:53
Shut it all off and go back to pretending you're in the 90s,
26:58
you know what I mean? Like because the 90's, the early
27:02
90s was the last time there was really no social media and it
27:07
was just a totally different time.
27:09
And I think people now are yearning for that.
27:12
Have you heard of those lock boxes?
27:14
Yes, or whatever. It makes you shut your phone.
27:17
Like it shuts your phone off automatically.
27:20
And I've also heard of these just blocks.
27:22
Yeah, that's people are right, Yeah.
27:23
Like a block. Yeah, that you that takes you
27:26
offline. But it's so funny because only
27:30
someone younger would think of that because, like, you and I
27:33
would just shut our phones off, right?
27:34
You know what I mean? But they're so ingrained with it
27:38
that it's like they're in withdrawal.
27:41
What's the technical way we can get you off the cat?
27:43
Exactly. So yes, I think taking all
27:47
social media, whether it's social media, answering emails,
27:50
whatever it is, getting rid of all of it for 24 hours, you'll
27:55
notice your mental health. You will notice that it's a.
27:58
It's a vast difference, and I admire all local hearts for my
28:02
mural. But you can of course customize
28:04
that for the community you're in.
28:06
Most communities these days have beautiful murals.
28:11
Go on a picnic. I love picnic.
28:13
Self-care for sure. Now we're on to our final row
28:16
for March. Practice patience.
28:20
That's my toughest. I think patience is my weakest.
28:25
That one would be hard. That would have to be a
28:27
practice, like really where you're practicing it before you
28:31
actually do it. I try.
28:33
I've been trying to be more patient.
28:36
These are This is self-care bingo.
28:38
Wave to a neighbor. Oh, I think that's so important.
28:41
I always wave to my neighbors. Always.
28:44
Doing something outside of your comfort zone counts as
28:48
self-care. It does.
28:50
It does, really, yes. That's not your comfort zone.
28:56
Getting out of your comfort zone.
28:58
Staying in your comfort zone is within your comfort.
29:00
Zone, right? Exactly.
29:02
I'm a little bit different than you in that I'm down for that.
29:06
Try a new recipe. I know you're.
29:07
I love that. That to me is very relaxing.
29:11
And then this final one is 1. I also know that you would love
29:14
and it is change your pillowcases and your sheets.
29:17
Well, I change them. I change my pillowcases every
29:20
other day and my sheets twice a week because I have a dog and I
29:24
found out I'm allergic to that dog.
29:26
But that dog won't get out of my bed, so I have to change.
29:30
And I have to say by the way, I look forward to sheet changing
29:34
day. You do.
29:36
Oh, I love it. I think it's so when.
29:39
You slide into that fresh bed, it's just.
29:41
The best? That's why it's under self-care,
29:44
because when you slide into, I mean ours, I will tell you it's
29:47
once a week, but I, I love it. I love it.
29:51
It's just it, it's to me, yes. I wouldn't even believe that
29:56
That's on self-care. That's how much I love it.
29:58
That is the best idea ever because and buying new sheets
30:03
and getting rid of the old sheets.
30:04
They're all like have little fuzz balls on them or rips in
30:08
them and getting some nice new sheets and a new blank.
30:13
And invest in those, by the way, invest in comfort.
30:17
Yes, this is where you're spending hopefully a lot of your
30:23
life. I'm spending a lot of my life.
30:26
Yeah, yeah. So I, I do think if you invest
30:29
in good sheets and they don't have to be expensive, I've found
30:32
some really high quality sheets that are inexpensive.
30:35
I mean, you don't have to spend a lot of money.
30:37
It's just a matter. But like I said, if you have a
30:40
dog, sometimes you're changing them a lot.
30:43
So you need more than like your standard three sets or whatever,
30:46
because you're constantly I mean to do it.
30:49
Yes, we have a bed full of dogs. Yes, in our house.
30:52
OK, so that's self-care. bingohearts4mindsthe#4.org is
30:58
where we got this. They have a different bingo card
31:01
for every month of the year. And hopefully you will share
31:05
with us your experience with this because we're going to post
31:09
it in our ladies only, uncluttered and unfiltered
31:11
Facebook page. We invite you to join that.
31:14
And we have every other social media out there.
31:17
We're not necessarily the most proficient at all of it, but we
31:21
we give it our best. And if you would be so kind as
31:24
to leave us reviews and do all of the things that you hear
31:28
everybody on podcast asks you to do, believe it or not, those do
31:31
help others find us and that's the main reason we care.
31:35
We just want you to share us with your best friend, your
31:38
cousin, your sister, somebody. All right, so we're moving on.
31:44
We're we're going to tell you this if you if you've been
31:48
leaving dirty sheets on your bed where you're just thinking you
31:52
don't deserve new fresh ones for no reason other than for
31:55
self-care, that's an idea that you can let go.
31:59
And don't look back.