Latest / Ay Mijita ✨ Embrace your raíces. Reclaim your esencia. / Silencing Your Inner Cabrona

Transcript

Silencing Your Inner Cabrona · Ay Mijita ✨ Embrace your raíces. Reclaim your esencia.

• 0:06
  Dora: Hi miji ta.
• 0:07
  Dora: Let's be real for a second.
• 0:08
  Dora: How many times have you told yourself I'm not good enough?
• 0:12
  Dora: Or who the hell do I think I am?
• 0:15
  Dora: And boom, just like that, you stop yourself before you even get started.
• 0:21
  Dora: That little voice inside your head, esa cabrona, has a way of keeping us small.
• 0:25
  Dora: Today we're diving into self-doubt, self-sabotage and the inner critic.
• 0:31
  Dora: All the ways we talk shit to ourselves without even noticing.
• 0:36
  Dora: Pero listen, healing starts with how we speak to ourselves.
• 0:41
  Dora: Your relationship to you sets the tone for everything else.
• 0:46
  Dora: If you can shift the way you love, hold and speak to yourself, mijita, you will transform your entire life.
• 0:54
  Dora: Así que grab your cafecito, tecito or beverage of choice, get cozy, or maybe pull out your journal and a pen.
• 1:04
  Dora: This episode is going to feel like the loving yet real talk you didn't know you needed.
• 1:11
  Dora: Let's talk this out for what it is.
• 1:26
  Dora: The inner critic is that little mean girl or mean tío living rent-free in your mind, the one that whispers don't even try, you'll fail.
• 1:37
  Dora: Or mira, you're not smart enough, not pretty enough, not disciplined enough.
• 1:44
  Dora: Any of that sound familiar?
• 1:45
  Dora: Here's the truth.
• 1:47
  Dora: That voice, it's not even yours.
• 1:50
  Dora: Nope, it comes from childhood, from cultura, from the survival mode we had to live in.
• 2:03
  Dora: Maybe it was a parent, maybe it was society, maybe it was generational trauma saying stay small, don't make noise, don't stand out oh goodness gracious.
• 2:10
  Dora: I remember.
• 2:12
  Dora: For me, this inner critic was when I was in school, like in high school, and I would get a bad grade.
• 2:19
  Dora: I always felt that I needed to perform right and I needed to make my mi papa super proud because I was a first gen and I was a first born, a mujer, because he didn't have a guy right, a boy, as his first born.
• 2:33
  Dora: And so I always thought that I needed to prove myself.
• 2:36
  Dora: And when it came to my grades I thought, oh, I needed to get straight A's and everything, but my dad did not care, like honestly did not care.
• 2:46
  Dora: I think he got more upset with me when I drew on the walls with chalk in art, because I was like when I was in grade school I had the three strikes and you're out, kind of thing, or like on the board, on the chalkboard, and the teacher ended up like telling me oh, you got to sit out or whatever.
• 3:03
  Dora: I think I was talking to my friends and not staying on task.
• 3:08
  Dora: That's when I just decided to grab the chalk from the chalkboard and just start drawing on the wall, and I remember my dad saying I'm drawing on the walls and doing stupid shit, and and I was like, oh my gosh, here we go.
• 3:24
  Dora: And instead of like defending his kid, he like reprimanded me even more.
• 3:31
  Dora: So I know that was in a small scale, but on a grander scale, with my dad specifically, and all those around me, was when I got pregnant at 16.
• 3:41
  Dora: So I was my sophomore year in high school and I learned that I'm pregnant with Philly.
• 3:46
  Dora: Right, philly and I are expecting.
• 3:48
  Dora: And I decided, oh well, I'm going to figure life out, I'm not going to tell my parents until you know.
• 3:54
  Dora: Way later.
• 3:55
  Dora: And I was actually the maid of honor for my cousin's wedding, and so I decided okay, I'm going to wait until the wedding's over, and then I'll tell them.
• 4:10
  Dora: Four months into my pregnancy, I leave them a letter on the kitchen table.
• 4:12
  Dora: I left one for my dad, philly left one for my mom explaining you know, we're going to figure stuff out and I'm going to move out, I'm going to take all my chivas and then go.
• 4:18
  Dora: You know, live with Philly.
• 4:19
  Dora: Well, little did I know that I needed to come back and I was reported as a runaway.
• 4:27
  Dora: My dad dropped me off, actually the day before the police come knocking on the door take me back home.
• 4:31
  Dora: And when I went to that police station where I grew up in Roselle Illinois, I saw my dad and my mom and my sisters were sitting there crying.
• 4:41
  Dora: They had no clue what was going on, too little to understand that their sister was pregnant.
• 4:47
  Dora: And I would become like the laughingstock, let's say, of the family.
• 4:52
  Dora: And everyone was going to in a way like stop talking to us.
• 4:57
  Dora: And for my parents keeping up the appearances, keeping up with the Joneses, like they cared about what other people would think, so, judging wise, my friends just began to stop talking to me.
• 5:11
  Dora: My family stopped talking to us because they wanted to avoid that like the plague right.
• 5:16
  Dora: They didn't want their daughters getting pregnant or doing anything like sexual right Too early at 16 16.
• 5:23
  Dora: But I kind of knew better, like Pili wasn't my first boyfriend, so, um, we'll leave it there.
• 5:29
  Dora: So going through this good girl mentality was real, like that was ingrained in my like bones and when I started feeling that judgment, especially with my dad, I could just tell that something totally like cracked.
• 5:43
  Dora: There was no going back.
• 5:44
  Dora: So with my dad, I could just tell that something totally like cracked, there was no going back.
• 5:46
  Dora: So with my dad, he told me he felt completely disappointed in me and ever since that point forward, like I kind of grieved my dad at 16 because that was the version of my dad, that he was so loving and caring before up to that moment and then after that it just went really south our relationship.
• 6:05
  Dora: So with that whole situation I was so hard on myself I thought, oh, I'm doomed.
• 6:13
  Dora: I listened to everyone.
• 6:14
  Dora: They're like oh you're, you know you're not going to make it out, just graduate high school, get a job, support your daughter who knows if the baby daddy's going to stay with you.
• 6:21
  Dora: And fast forward to now.
• 6:24
  Dora: Philly and I are still together 23 years.
• 6:27
  Dora: Bumpy road, of course, but it wasn't easy.
• 6:30
  Dora: And especially fighting those inner thoughts of thinking, oh, I'm the worst daughter, I'm the worst mom, I'm the worst girlfriend, I'm the worst everything.
• 6:40
  Dora: I'm the worst student, because now I have to balance my books on one lap and balance my daughter and the other trying to feed her the bottle.
• 6:47
  Dora: Like it was crazy.
• 6:48
  Dora: And I had honors and advanced classes, so I thought I was a smart cookie.
• 6:51
  Dora: But oh my, it was a lot of work.
• 6:54
  Dora: I remember just sleeping like three, four hours just to get my homework done.
• 6:58
  Dora: And my son actually just started high school and let me tell you it's triggering me as fuck right now because he's in soccer.
• 7:05
  Dora: He wakes up sometimes early for practice.
• 7:07
  Dora: He just started last week.
• 7:08
  Dora: Like drop him off at before six in the morning and then I have to pick him up at five because he's practicing and then he has honors classes too and a lot of fucking homework.
• 7:17
  Dora: I'm like, oh, I don't miss those days, but now everything's on the fucking iPad.
• 7:20
  Dora: So there you go.
• 7:21
  Dora: But that's where it's so beautiful in the same sense, and I feel like full circle because I'm giving my kids a different life, you know.
• 7:33
  Dora: But they still feel that judgment, probably from us, right, the expectation, but for me, having that judgment from others was really harsh.
• 7:41
  Dora: I would say I was expected to do a lot more than I could endure at the time.
• 7:47
  Dora: I worked three jobs during my senior year, didn't really see my daughter and she was about one and a half when I moved out with Philly after graduating high school and just building your own family or building your own foundation, working, going to school, getting accepted to a university of your dreams, but it was a lot to hang on to.
• 8:11
  Dora: You know, it was a lot to go through.
• 8:13
  Dora: And being able to always be the superstar or the A student slowly began fading away because I needed to get by, I needed to survive slowly began fading away because I needed to get by, I needed to survive.
• 8:26
  Dora: So I remember waking up and it's like you got to do this, you got to do it for your daughter, you got to do it.
• 8:34
  Dora: I don't know where you're going to find the strength, or else you're going to be a failure, and I was so scared of being a failure.
• 8:38
  Dora: Everything that was told to me that I wouldn't succeed in everything, I kind of transmuted that to be the force for me to move forward, for me to move on and keep continuing on, just so el dia de mañana, you know, in the future, my daughter didn't say because of her I didn't succeed, or because of her I didn't go to school and I didn't do all these big dreams that I had for myself.
• 9:00
  Dora: And so, going through those motions and being so crappy to myself, I remember telling myself that I was so stupid, that I was so dumb that you know, I would be paralyzed in fear because I just cared so much of what other people would think about me.
• 9:20
  Dora: So that inner voice, like it's, it's for real.
• 9:23
  Dora: So let's just pause and think right now for a second.
• 9:28
  Dora: What does your inner critic sound like?
• 9:31
  Dora: Is it sarcastic?
• 9:33
  Dora: Is it fearful?
• 9:35
  Dora: Does it use your mom's voice?
• 9:36
  Dora: Write it down or say it out loud.
• 9:40
  Dora: Naming it is the first step to actually healing.
• 9:43
  Dora: Out loud Naming it is the first step to actually healing.
• 9:52
  Dora: So take a moment here, pause or just meditate on what comes up for you.
• 10:21
  Dora: Now let's get spicy, because that inner critic doesn't just talk, she takes the wheel, she makes you self-sabotage, you procrastinate, you break down your own promises, you ghost yourself, you stop showing up for the very thing you've been praying for.
• 10:44
  Dora: And let's be real, sometimes it's easier to quit than to risk failing.
• 10:50
  Dora: But guess what?
• 10:51
  Dora: That's not just protection, that's self-sabotage dressed up as safety.
• 10:56
  Dora: So I'm going to be completely transparent with you on this.
• 11:02
  Dora: When I started this podcast I think I started last year in May I dropped my first trailer and I try to figure stuff out, like the tech and how to upload and all that, and I thought I needed, like this fancy website and all these gadgets, right, I, my sister gifted me a podcast book and a podcast microphone, like about five years ago during COVID, and I'm like, oh yeah, I'm going to record.
• 11:29
  Dora: Right, I was scared, shitless.
• 11:32
  Dora: Like I was really, really scared because I was not liking the sound of my voice or there was something always in the works, right, of working myself up that, oh, people are not going to like it.
• 11:45
  Dora: I don't know what I'm going to talk about.
• 11:46
  Dora: People are going to think I'm weird, like especially knowing me as the accountant like I'm talking about spirituality and astrology and human design and all these things.
• 11:58
  Dora: And I was actually just thinking about that this week, about how, eight years ago, when I hurt my back, I started documenting mentally and on my phone like voice notes, and you got to see my office.
• 12:10
  Dora: I have like pads and pads and pads of paper, like legal pads of all the notes.
• 12:16
  Dora: I've taken my phone Like I think a few years ago I ran out of storage and I needed to invest in my Google drive and upgrade, you know, for the storage.
• 12:26
  Dora: It's been a ride.
• 12:28
  Dora: It's been eight years that I've been at it, especially when this podcast was born and I knew that I wanted to call it iMijita, so I ended up buying the domain name for iMijitacom four years back.
• 12:42
  Dora: And for me, I think, sometimes, when you think of something and you don't act upon it like someone and I don't know if this has happened to you, but something you think about or you dream about, all of a sudden somebody else kind of does it if you don't act upon it.
• 12:58
  Dora: So I felt like somebody else is going to come out with the damn podcast and talk about these things and I'm not right, they're going to beat me to the punch.
• 13:05
  Dora: But for some reason I've been working at it ever since and, god willing, I was able to put this out and it required so much of me to be able to record, to be vulnerable.
• 13:17
  Dora: There was another thing I just put out this year, earlier.
• 13:21
  Dora: This year was a post about tarot reading, or oracle card readings, and I don't really do tarot.
• 13:27
  Dora: It's more of oracle cards like the ones I read at the end of some episodes, and for me it's a divinity tool and I thought people were gonna think that I'm very odd, right, like what the fuck is Dora doing with like oracle cards and stuff?
• 13:45
  Dora: I think I posted a story like a couple years back of me.
• 13:49
  Dora: Oh no, it was like three, four years ago and I thought, oh, I will do this right on the side or whatnot, like I'll post slides.
• 13:54
  Dora: Yeah, no, didn't happen.
• 13:56
  Dora: But again, it was all because I was getting in my head Like I thought I needed to look a certain way, I needed to have the lights, I needed to be all like dolled up with makeup and you know my hair and I need to dress a certain part.
• 14:08
  Dora: And that's where I was just getting in my head and I'm happy that I was able to overcome that fear and actually put something out.
• 14:17
  Dora: But I sabotage myself so many times and I do that with so many different things that I want to put out there, so many offerings, how I want to help.
• 14:26
  Dora: One of the things that I didn't claim my power was with coaching, like being able to help individuals, specifically women.
• 14:37
  Dora: But I work with anyone.
• 14:38
  Dora: I'm coaching them on what their challenges during their life.
• 14:42
  Dora: You know where are they at this point in time and moment and I thought I didn't know enough.
• 14:47
  Dora: I thought, oh, I have to be the therapist and I have to get all these degrees and I have to sign up for all these classes and so historically, especially these past few years, I've been investing a lot in myself but I just didn't think I was worthy enough.
• 14:59
  Dora: I thought, oh, I'm just going to sign up for the free stuff, the webinars and stuff.
• 15:03
  Dora: But this year I've actually started dropping some money on coaching, business coaches, spiritual collectives and the like and working with other healers simultaneously, and that's where I thought I needed more credentials.
• 15:23
  Dora: But what I was really afraid of was being judged being judged that I didn't know enough or I wasn't good enough, and that's how I was starting to get in my own way.
• 15:31
  Dora: But once I start working with a person like I, just I don't know what happens that the person gets what they need and I get what they need, and we tend to like reciprocate.
• 15:42
  Dora: You know that energy.
• 15:44
  Dora: I'm able to take a person from feeling overwhelmed, having the challenge going through the motions, feeling like the world is crumbling and falling apart all around them, and I'm able to guide them to a place where it's like calm, grounded.
• 15:58
  Dora: We get to the root of the problem and I'm able to do it like within an hour or like within 30 minutes of working with someone.
• 16:04
  Dora: It's like amazing how that stuff happens.
• 16:06
  Dora: But at first I was so afraid that people were just going to think, oh, what does she know about my business?
• 16:12
  Dora: Or like, mis cosas, mis problemas.
• 16:16
  Dora: They sometimes would think that I have a perfect life.
• 16:19
  Dora: I'm like, whew, people only knew.
• 16:22
  Dora: And I think that's where I wanted to use this platform too, is to talk about the real shit that everybody goes through day to day.
• 16:28
  Dora: And what I go through and what I've been through and you know in the past, like, for example, money wise, I'm still working through those money wounds.
• 16:36
  Dora: It was what, like 12 years ago, I declared bankruptcy and that was something that you wouldn't expect from accountant.
• 16:45
  Dora: Right, like to declare bankruptcy and have a shitty like credit and all that.
• 16:49
  Dora: But fortunately my husband and I have been able to crawl ourselves out of that, those habits, and we still kind of go through the motions.
• 16:56
  Dora: Right, we endure some debt and then we have to kind of crawl out of it again and it's all these patterns.
• 17:02
  Dora: But again it's like the way you think, it's the mindset.
• 17:04
  Dora: It's not necessarily like you got to save and you have to like avoid that.
• 17:08
  Dora: Sometimes it's more of what is the life you want to live.
• 17:12
  Dora: But then again, like are you willing to take a risk, and then you know you're going to make it up, you know you're going to get better.
• 17:17
  Dora: But sometimes it's all in your head Right, and that's the one thing that I had, and I still continue to work on, is trying to overcome those fears that I'm going to be broke, that I'm going to be homeless, that I'm going to lose everything.
• 17:35
  Dora: Because guess what?
• 17:35
  Dora: I've already lost a lot of different times in my life.
• 17:36
  Dora: I've lost everything.
• 17:37
  Dora: Everything is burned to the ground, and I later realized that that's something that you just build stronger.
• 17:41
  Dora: And to top it off, here's the cultura piece.
• 17:46
  Dora: So many of us grew up being told don't act too much, no seas presumida.
• 17:50
  Dora: We were trained to stay humble, quiet, small.
• 17:54
  Dora: So when we try to shine, the old programming kicks in.
• 17:58
  Dora: So I want you to take a moment, think back.
• 18:02
  Dora: What was the last opportunity?
• 18:04
  Dora: You had something you wanted so badly and you stopped yourself.
• 18:09
  Dora: What excuse did you use?
• 18:13
  Dora: Was it I don't have time, or I don't have money, or I'll do it later.
• 18:23
  Dora: Write that shit down, because when we see the pattern, we can then work on breaking it.
• 18:29
  Dora: Okay, so now that we've dragged la criticona out into the light, let's talk healing, because you cannot shame or bully yourself into transformation.
• 18:39
  Dora: Healing starts with compassion, with reparenting the inner child.
• 18:43
  Dora: What does that mean?
• 18:46
  Dora: It means you give yourself what you didn't get.
• 18:50
  Dora: You become la mama, the protector, the cheerleader you always needed.
• 18:56
  Dora: You stop saying I'm broken and you start saying I'm healing, I'm learning, I'm growing.
• 19:02
  Dora: So cut yourself some grace.
• 19:14
  Dora: So one thing that I started doing in the mornings and then throughout the day was to really pause and think and hold myself, like especially if I was feeling that emotional drive.
• 19:19
  Dora: You know the emotions, the crying unconsolably for no reason, and that's where I would then learn.
• 19:30
  Dora: Later did I learn?
• 19:31
  Dora: It was called emotional regulation, but that's where I would like ground myself, and that could be walking outside like feeling the grass in my feet, like bare feet, and that I learned from my coach my initial coach and then I started diving into astrology and human design to understand myself a little bit better.
• 19:52
  Dora: And that's like foreign language if you don't get it, and I totally see where you're coming from if you don't understand either of those things, but it really helped me dig into.
• 20:05
  Dora: Oh, this is why I am the way I am, for example, being a generator.
• 20:10
  Dora: I like to start shit, but I don't like to finish it sometimes, and that is most of us, most of the people in population, and that I call normal.
• 20:19
  Dora: So at least that was a common thread right with other people.
• 20:22
  Dora: And so I've learned also, too, that I need to follow my gut, like I have a sacral authority from a human design perspective, and if my gut says uh-huh, like it's a yes, then I have to honor that.
• 20:35
  Dora: Sometimes my brain's like no, that's just, that's crazy, why, why are we gonna go down this route?
• 20:39
  Dora: It's not logically making sense right now.
• 20:42
  Dora: But if I am like in my gut, if I'm no, like I don't know about that, like I have a funny feeling, well, I should honor that, or else I'm going to end up paying 10 times more.
• 20:56
  Dora: The other thing, too, is like how you talk to yourself.
• 21:00
  Dora: Would you talk to a friend like that, se lo dirías a tu amiga, se lo dirías a un niño, like would you say well, I know, like my kids, sometimes I want to say you know, but would you really say that to someone like a stranger?
• 21:15
  Dora: Would you treat them like that?
• 21:17
  Dora: And maybe you will right, maybe you do say those things in your head and you would say them out loud and you have diarrhea of the mouth.
• 21:22
  Dora: That's fine, but you want to treat yourself with respect, like you need to respect that.
• 21:29
  Dora: But I respect that, right, that's like a golden rule somewhere and that's where I would catch myself having these negative self-talks, especially if I make a mistake at work specifically.
• 21:40
  Dora: Oh my God, I would cry.
• 21:43
  Dora: I know my coworkers have seen me cry at my desk because I made a big ass mistake and it used to be $600.
• 21:51
  Dora: Now it's like more in the thousands or, if not, millions, and of course, that's not okay, right?
• 21:56
  Dora: I mean, as life goes on, it's just bigger stakes, bigger responsibilities that you have flipping that script for myself on.
• 22:11
  Dora: Okay, all right, dora, we fucked up.
• 22:12
  Dora: Right now, we screwed this up.
• 22:13
  Dora: But how can we make it right?
• 22:13
  Dora: How can we do this prospectively and what was the issue?
• 22:15
  Dora: What happened?
• 22:16
  Dora: So we can fix it?
• 22:17
  Dora: Moving forward, and sometimes beautiful things happen from mistakes, like you end up learning and investigating and if you're like me, I doubt my world as to what's credible, what's not, and I tend to like take everything apart and try to build it together, like I'm good at that.
• 22:35
  Dora: So now it's like mistakes happen because it's an opportunity.
• 22:42
  Dora: Take it as that.
• 22:44
  Dora: Take it as an opportunity that I'm going to get better, that this is just another iteration and we're not going to do it perfect.
• 22:52
  Dora: That's what life is all about.
• 22:54
  Dora: Like I know, ai is supposedly perfection right, that they're going to replace like a bunch of stuff that we do, but making a mistake proves you're human, you know we have that connection, connection, and so take advantage of that.
• 23:08
  Dora: Take advantage of those learning opportunities.
• 23:10
  Dora: And failure is the first attempt in learning.
• 23:14
  Dora: That be learning something new, learning something for the 10th time, like you keep on at it right, you keep on practicing, you keep on going through the motions because it's going to get better and better, like the wine.
• 23:26
  Dora: You know you got to keep it going.
• 23:29
  Dora: So grab your journal and write down three things your inner critic says to you on repeat.
• 23:35
  Dora: Now reframe each one of those.
• 23:38
  Dora: For example, I'm not enough.
• 23:40
  Dora: You can reframe that with.
• 23:42
  Dora: I am rooted in my ancestors' strength.
• 23:45
  Dora: I am more than enough.
• 23:46
  Dora: I am rooted in my ancestors' strength.
• 23:46
  Dora: I am more than enough.
• 23:48
  Dora: Or I'm always messing things up.
• 23:51
  Dora: You can reframe that with.
• 23:54
  Dora: I'm learning.
• 23:54
  Dora: Every mistake is wisdom for my path, and I'll give you one more.
• 23:59
  Dora: I'll never get it right.
• 24:01
  Dora: You can reframe that to.
• 24:07
  Dora: I am already on my way.
• 24:07
  Dora: My timing is perfect.
• 24:10
  Dora: Now let's get into practical, porque we need tools, otherwise that inner critic will keep running the show.
• 24:17
  Dora: Here are some of my go-tos Breath work Just three deep breaths to reset your nervous system when you're spiraling out of control.
• 24:29
  Dora: That, or you could do the box method, which is four breaths in, hold it for four, and then four breaths out, or four counts, not breaths, and then, when you breathe out for four, you hold it at the end there for four, and then you repeat three more times, or how many ever you feel like you need.
• 24:50
  Dora: The next that I like to do is mirror work.
• 24:56
  Dora: So that is legit.
• 24:58
  Dora: What it sounds like is going to the mirror, looking at yourself in your eyes and saying I love you, I trust you, you are enough.
• 25:09
  Dora: So I dare you to do that.
• 25:10
  Dora: Well, not right now, if you're driving in that I mean if you are a stoplight or that, you can do it but go to the mirror and say those things I love you, I trust you, you are enough and look at yourself in the eyes.
• 25:26
  Dora: You know Ojo, ojo, like.
• 25:28
  Dora: Look deep in those eyes because you are beautiful in and out.
• 25:34
  Dora: My next one is affirmations and limpias.
• 25:37
  Dora: So you can definitely write some affirmations down and you can cleanse your energy with herbs, the huevo or even a shower with intention cleanse your energy with herbs, the huevo or even a shower with intention.
• 25:52
  Dora: The last one is boundaries with yourself, and this one's a little more like I don't want to say high difficulty level, but this one takes a little bit of accountability with yourself, because you have to stop over committing, stop promising la luna y las estrellas to everyone else in the world while giving yourself las millajas, the crumbs.
• 26:11
  Dora: So my favorite thing to do to ground myself and maybe this is an extra bonus one is I pull oracle cards in the morning or I journal and then I do a limpia especially with the palo santo is my go-to in the morning.
• 26:30
  Dora: I do three circles and I say I release all negative energy.
• 26:33
  Dora: I release all negative energy.
• 26:35
  Dora: I release all negative energy, and that's especially when I'm feeling heavy.
• 26:40
  Dora: So before I usually do those things, I feel the heaviness and I feel chaotic at times, and I'll probably sometimes do it during the day as well, if I'm feeling like after a meeting, I'm like, oh, that person had like heavy energy, or that was a lot or I felt overwhelmed or I feel it coming on, and that's where doing that piece of realignment will center you, to then be able to think clear.
• 27:10
  Dora: So when they say, when you're going through a problem or you're doing something like very intensive, you need to step away, sometimes, take a break, well, I was notorious, and I'm still notorious, for just working through my lunch and that.
• 27:23
  Dora: But if you take those that minute break or you know, take that time to yourself, a few minutes, you will notice a shift and for some reason, the answers will come to you.
• 27:35
  Dora: So trust that.
• 27:36
  Dora: So, in reflection of this, what's one tool you can commit to this week?
• 27:42
  Dora: I mean, I'm not saying forever, I'm just saying maybe seven days, breath work, the journaling, maybe a limpia, write it down and actually do it.
• 27:55
  Dora: This is how transformation happens Little by little, brick by brick.
• 28:00
  Dora: We're building this journey together.
• 28:02
  Dora: Mijita, aquí está la verdad.
• 28:06
  Dora: The inner critic isn't truth, it's just a voice from conditioning, it's old programming and healing.
• 28:15
  Dora: It's reclaiming your voice, your essence, your poder.
• 28:19
  Dora: Every time you choose to speak kindly to yourself, you're breaking cycles.
• 28:25
  Dora: Every time you choose self-love instead of self-sabotage, you're healing generations forward and generations back.
• 28:36
  Dora: So I used to really lose myself, and being the accountant at work and I actually thought that was my identity, was what I did at work, and little did I know I was in so much more capacity to do so much other things besides work.
• 28:53
  Dora: Right, I'm not every time I would introduce myself.
• 28:55
  Dora: It would be I'm the accountant or I'm an accountant, and it wasn't just that.
• 29:00
  Dora: It's like I'm a mom, I'm a wife, I'm a daughter, I volunteer in my community, I'm a president of the board at an organization.
• 29:09
  Dora: I love All these various things.
• 29:11
  Dora: I volunteer on the weekdays.
• 29:13
  Dora: I'm a soccer coach.
• 29:16
  Dora: I love to work with individuals on their challenges.
• 29:19
  Dora: I'm a life coach, I'm a healer All these various things, all these facets.
• 29:24
  Dora: We are multifaceted people and I can multitask.
• 29:29
  Dora: So when I lost myself in the mode of like I'm an accountant, instead of like showing up in my true self, I would actually code switch at work.
• 29:38
  Dora: I would walk in through the door and I would be like business, dora, you know, like I have to keep my life outside.
• 29:45
  Dora: I can't cry at work, I can't do anything at work.
• 29:47
  Dora: Like I felt like I was robotic, like zombie mode.
• 29:48
  Dora: I can't cry at work, I can't do anything at work.
• 29:48
  Dora: I felt like I was robotic, like zombie mode, and that was such a crappy era I felt like a black hole somehow that I would just go into there and I had no emotions, no feelings.
• 30:01
  Dora: I would just go to work and I would be nice.
• 30:06
  Dora: I mean, it wasn't like I was just completely robotic with no emotions, but I would be nice.
• 30:10
  Dora: It's just it wasn't the me, like my throat chakra or you know, being able to verbalize something took me so long, like people.
• 30:19
  Dora: I remember when the president of the company told me I need to be more assertive and I thought that was, I need to be a bitch, and that was totally not.
• 30:28
  Dora: It got the wrong memo.
• 30:29
  Dora: So I didn't really work with people.
• 30:31
  Dora: I didn't ask for help.
• 30:32
  Dora: I thought I had to be the chingona at work too and I had to figure it all out on my own.
• 30:35
  Dora: And you know the other thing too I would show up sick, like this is way before COVID, but I would be like drugged up on antibiotics and NyQuil and DayQuil and the works and everything and sinuses or whatever I've worked through ear infections, migraines and everything.
• 30:50
  Dora: And then when people would come, oh, she missed work because she had a migraine or oh, she was sick.
• 30:56
  Dora: I'm like oh, my parents taught me you got to work because you got to get that money.
• 31:00
  Dora: You got to work hard.
• 31:02
  Dora: And that's where I didn't realize I was so overriding all my boundaries Well, I didn't even have boundaries back then but I was not honoring myself.
• 31:11
  Dora: I would work through like I legit because we live in Chicago I would drive to the office in like a severe snowstorm and my daughter I would take my daughter with me and she would help out and people call me crazy because it's like what are you doing here?
• 31:31
  Dora: I live like an hour away.
• 31:32
  Dora: It would take me two hours in the snow with rear wheel transmission or whatever in my Dodge Charger and it would take me two hours to get to work and I couldn't even stop at the stoplight because I would just get stuck in the snow.
• 31:46
  Dora: That was how much of a dedicated worker I was.
• 31:50
  Dora: But I didn't realize I wasn't being my authentic self and I wasn't using my authentic voice.
• 31:55
  Dora: I was actually being the good girl.
• 31:57
  Dora: I was being the one that was conditioned to be like oh yes, whatever you say, the people pleaser the one that got shit done and did it with a smile.
• 32:05
  Dora: That's how, how I was, and instead of now, where I actually advocate for myself, for my team and my teammates, I'm like, wait, this doesn't make sense.
• 32:14
  Dora: Can you explain it to me a little more, or a little more detail, or help me understand this?
• 32:19
  Dora: Because I'm not following and before it was kind of like, oh, I would just take notes and it's like, okay, cool, I'll have it done, and I would actually do a lot of manual work that was so unnecessary, the busy work, and I don't know if it was because I thought people needed me, or like job security, that it was all living in my head.
• 32:34
  Dora: But yeah, no, documentation should be real, like being able to roll out processes and all that.
• 32:39
  Dora: Like now I understand why.
• 32:41
  Dora: So you don't wanna be stuck doing the grunt work, right, you want to optimize things.
• 32:49
  Dora: So that's where I finally went from losing myself and everyone else's needs and finally reclaiming the Dora.
• 32:54
  Dora: That was me, the real me.
• 32:58
  Dora: Mijita, you are worthy.
• 33:00
  Dora: If nobody has told you that, you are fucking worthy.
• 33:03
  Dora: Worthy of peace, of love, of joy, of success.
• 33:08
  Dora: Don't let that cabrona inner critic write your story.
• 33:11
  Dora: You get to write it every single day when you wake up.
• 33:15
  Dora: You get to dictate what's the mood today.
• 33:17
  Dora: What am I going to do?
• 33:18
  Dora: Tú eres la autora de tu vida.
• 33:20
  Dora: Thank you, if today's episode spoke to you, share with a friend who needs to hear this and if you're ready to go deeper, to break these patterns and reclaim your esencia, join me inside of my one-on-one coaching program.
• 33:56
  Dora: The inner shift de adentro para afuera.
• 33:58
  Dora: This is where we go all in on healing the wounds, clearing the energy and embodying your authentic self.
• 34:05
  Dora: You can learn more at www.
• 34:07
  Dora: dorapraxedis.
• 34:07
  Dora: com and it's right there on my website and you can also get a free um freebie the Raices checklist that I put together.
• 34:21
  Dora: It covers everything from the limpia astrology um birth charts and a little bit more about my offering the one-on-one coaching.
• 34:31
  Dora: Or you can reach out to me via email at dora D-O-R-A at dorapraxedis.
• 34:39
  Dora: com.
• 34:40
  Dora: You can also follow me on Instagram @dpraxedis, and you can also send me a DM with your biggest takeaway.
• 34:51
  Dora: Let's keep that conversation going and I'm so curious to see what your takeaways are from today's episode.
• 34:57
  Dora: And remember, embrace your raices, reclaim your esencia.
• 35:01
  Dora: Nos vemos pronto Con cariño.
• 35:04
  Dora: Les mando un fuerte abrazo.
• 35:05
  Dora: Que estén bien, and we'll see you next time.