Latest / Brooke and Jeffrey: Phone Taps / Phone Tap: Ground Eagles of the Sewer

Transcript

Phone Tap: Ground Eagles of the Sewer · Brooke and Jeffrey: Phone Taps

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: We rarely do this on the show because we have
• 0:02
  Speaker 1: listeners everywhere, all across the country and around the globe,
• 0:05
  Speaker 1: so we tend to edit out any local references from calls. Well,
• 0:11
  Speaker 1: it's further benefit because a lot of people they wouldn't
• 0:13
  Speaker 1: know what the hell they were talking about. But this
• 0:16
  Speaker 1: call is different. We're going deep into Florida. That's right.
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: It's a Florida tap with a woman who has an
• 0:24
  Speaker 1: Etsy business where she collects coconuts, paints them, and then
• 0:28
  Speaker 1: sells them online.
• 0:31
  Speaker 2: Normal Florida stuff.
• 0:32
  Speaker 1: Absolutely, and one of our listeners told us that she
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: does this and said, please mess with her big time.
• 0:37
  Speaker 1: So that's gonna be Brooks job in your phone tap
• 0:40
  Speaker 1: right now?
• 0:41
  Speaker 3: It's another.
• 0:46
  Speaker 2: Hello, Hi, I'm looking for Lauren k.
• 0:50
  Speaker 3: This is she? Who's this?
• 0:52
  Speaker 2: It's Valerie Shitsu from the Florida Wildlife Commission. Okay, are
• 0:57
  Speaker 2: a tough person to get a hold of. I've actually
• 1:00
  Speaker 2: come by your house a few times, but no one's
• 1:02
  Speaker 2: ever home.
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  Speaker 3: How do you know where I live? And why are
• 1:05
  Speaker 3: you coming to my house?
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  Speaker 2: Are you evading us?
• 1:08
  Speaker 3: Why would I evade you? What are you talking about?
• 1:10
  Speaker 3: What do you want?
• 1:12
  Speaker 2: Figured? You played dumb? Well, it's come to our attention
• 1:17
  Speaker 2: that you've been going around collecting coconuts, and wow, so
• 1:23
  Speaker 2: you admit it.
• 1:25
  Speaker 3: Yeah, what's the problem with that? They're coconuts? That it's
• 1:27
  Speaker 3: falling on the ground.
• 1:28
  Speaker 2: Oh, I had no idea it was gonna be like this.
• 1:34
  Speaker 3: So am I in trouble? Speaking of rotting coconuts off
• 1:36
  Speaker 3: the floor. What's the problem?
• 1:38
  Speaker 2: Okay, you're gonna downplay it? I see. Yeah, you are
• 1:40
  Speaker 2: in trouble. You're in big trouble. In fact. Okay, you're
• 1:44
  Speaker 2: laughing at this like it's nothing. Most people know this,
• 1:47
  Speaker 2: and hopefully you're not one of those that pretends to
• 1:49
  Speaker 2: act dumb.
• 1:51
  Speaker 3: I'm not dumb at all. Believe me. I've been doing
• 1:52
  Speaker 3: this for years. There's no problem with collecting rotting coconuts
• 1:54
  Speaker 3: off the floor.
• 1:55
  Speaker 2: Then you should know that you just violated an endangered
• 1:58
  Speaker 2: species law here in Florida.
• 2:01
  Speaker 3: Coconuts are an endangered species. What are you talking about?
• 2:04
  Speaker 2: Yeah, duh, coconuts aren't animals? Lady? Talking about the rats
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  Speaker 2: that eat the coconuts?
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  Speaker 3: What rats are endangered?
• 2:12
  Speaker 2: Manates, rats and bottled nosed dolphins.
• 2:14
  Speaker 3: Are You're all on the list?
• 2:16
  Speaker 2: Look it up?
• 2:17
  Speaker 3: Are rats and bottom of dolphins? Those go together in
• 2:22
  Speaker 3: a category. What are you talking about?
• 2:23
  Speaker 2: You knowingly violated Florida law by taking away the rats
• 2:27
  Speaker 2: natural food supply of rotting coconuts.
• 2:29
  Speaker 3: Yeah, there's no I don't know if endangered rats. Yes,
• 2:31
  Speaker 3: there's no endangered rats that I'm aware of.
• 2:33
  Speaker 2: Really, I don't know what your situation is. But where
• 2:36
  Speaker 2: I come from, and I've lived here a long time,
• 2:39
  Speaker 2: rats are revered. In fact, we call them the ground
• 2:43
  Speaker 2: eagles of the sewer.
• 2:44
  Speaker 3: I don't care what they're called, their rats, and if
• 2:46
  Speaker 3: they really are protective, they shouldn't be.
• 2:48
  Speaker 2: I see you're one of them, all right, one of them.
• 2:51
  Speaker 2: Let me ask you this, actually, let me ask you this.
• 2:53
  Speaker 2: Have you ever cuddled the rat? Oh?
• 2:55
  Speaker 3: Is that? That's disgusting? They're insanitary?
• 2:58
  Speaker 2: I have?
• 2:59
  Speaker 3: In fact, of course you have. That explained a lot.
• 3:00
  Speaker 2: In fact, I've got a dozen at my home and
• 3:02
  Speaker 2: we watch Wheel of Fortune every night, just snuggle up together.
• 3:06
  Speaker 3: Why am I not surprised to hear that?
• 3:08
  Speaker 2: And it makes me angry? Deep deep haatron Oh you
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  Speaker 2: to find out someone is taking away my baby's food source?
• 3:16
  Speaker 2: Oh my god, how would you like it if I
• 3:19
  Speaker 2: starve your baby?
• 3:20
  Speaker 3: What are you talking about? That is not the same thing.
• 3:23
  Speaker 2: It hurts. It hurts, doesn't it.
• 3:25
  Speaker 3: It doesn't hurt me. This is stupid.
• 3:27
  Speaker 2: What are you even doing with these coconuts?
• 3:29
  Speaker 3: Well, for your information, I'm an artist and I paint
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  Speaker 3: them and I sell them on Etsy and it does
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  Speaker 3: very well, thank you very much.
• 3:35
  Speaker 2: What you just admitted that you're stealing the food supply
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  Speaker 2: from tidy little rattlings and selling it illegally over the internet.
• 3:43
  Speaker 3: I'm stealing anything. I'm crarecting coconuts that fall on the ground,
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  Speaker 3: which many.
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  Speaker 2: People just need to take a note here, because we're
• 3:51
  Speaker 2: gonna be tacking on commercial trafficking charges as well, that's
• 3:54
  Speaker 2: for sure.
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  Speaker 3: You're me a freaking break lady. You don't know what
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  Speaker 3: you're doing.
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  Speaker 2: We're just gonna get to the nitty gritty here and
• 3:58
  Speaker 2: I'm gonna find you actually what, Yeah, find me yep.
• 4:02
  Speaker 2: I have all the evidence I need and that fine
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  Speaker 2: will be ten thousand dollars.
• 4:07
  Speaker 3: Are you joking ten thousand dollars for picking up rotten coconuts?
• 4:11
  Speaker 2: Well, it's actually your lucky day because it's either that
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  Speaker 2: ten thousand dollars fine or eight hundred hours of mandatory
• 4:17
  Speaker 2: community service.
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  Speaker 3: What picking up tracks now what I'm doing already with
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  Speaker 3: your huge yuts.
• 4:21
  Speaker 2: No, you'll be rehabilitating rats at the Everglade Rodent Rehabilitation Center.
• 4:26
  Speaker 2: Is that? Yeah? Duh? Okay, duh, this is not a
• 4:30
  Speaker 2: big deal.
• 4:31
  Speaker 3: Everybody does this.
• 4:32
  Speaker 2: That's where it starts, taking coconuts from rats. Next thing,
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  Speaker 2: you know, people will be calling for the public execution
• 4:37
  Speaker 2: of Mickey Mouse. Is that what you want?
• 4:40
  Speaker 3: Taking coconuts from a rats?
• 4:42
  Speaker 2: Is that?
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  Speaker 3: Really? That's what you're calling this.
• 4:43
  Speaker 2: That's what it is. And I believe it, and your
• 4:45
  Speaker 2: friend Josie believes it, and everybody here at this radio
• 4:49
  Speaker 2: station where you just got set up for a prank
• 4:51
  Speaker 2: phone call believes it as well.
• 4:55
  Speaker 3: Are you serious?
• 4:57
  Speaker 2: Yeah? This is actually Brook for the radio station. Brooke
• 5:00
  Speaker 2: Jeffrey in the Morning.
• 5:01
  Speaker 3: Oh my god, that was evil.
• 5:04
  Speaker 2: You can blame Josie, she said. Apparently your coconut Etsy
• 5:08
  Speaker 2: page is really taking off. But I want to ask
• 5:13
  Speaker 2: at the expense of what and who's life?
• 5:15
  Speaker 3: Should I say? How the rest?
• 5:18
  Speaker 2: You are evil?
• 5:22
  Speaker 3: Wake Up?
• 5:22
  Speaker 2: Every morning was phone taps weekday mornings on the twenties.
• 5:25
  Speaker 2: Brooke and Jeffrey in the Morning