Latest / Cage Match: A Roundabout Way of Meeting Nicolas Cage / Pig vs Left Behind

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Pig vs Left Behind · Cage Match: A Roundabout Way of Meeting Nicolas Cage

0:00
Oh, God. Oh, my God.
0:13
As someone who's raised pigs and I don't want to get into it.
0:17
Yeah, pigs, they're biters, but they're also really smart.
0:22
Well, welcome back to cage match with Nick and Sean
0:25
colon around about way of meeting Nicholas Cage.
0:28
I am your host, Sean, with my cohost Nick and our producer.
0:33
Peter. Hello.
0:34
This week, we will be discussing two fine films.
0:41
Yeah, they will be movies, movies.
0:45
Not to give up the goat too much, but I really liked one of them.
0:48
Yeah, one of them was great.
0:50
Somehow I feel like we're going to have different opinions of what's great.
0:53
Considering last week.
0:55
No, I think I'd be real disappointed if we didn't agree this week.
1:00
We are discussing Pig and cinematic
1:05
film left behind
1:09
the cinematic, the leavings behind left behind.
1:12
I think one of these movies is more.
1:16
Right for comedy gold, and we are a comedy podcast,
1:19
so let's start with left behind and Nick, why don't you tell us
1:23
what this movie was about?
1:25
Oh, this movie is about Nicholas Cage, who is a airline pilot.
1:34
Yeah, he's a pilot in this movie for an airplane.
1:37
Rayford Steel.
1:38
Yeah, the dumbest, second dumbest name in the movie.
1:42
The dumbest being his son, Rami, because it's spelled R.A.
1:45
Y.M.I. I miss that.
1:49
Yeah, it's hateful.
1:51
Yeah, Nicholas Cage, he's a pilot.
1:53
He's going to fly a plane in the movie.
1:58
His daughter comes home to surprise him for his birthday for college.
2:02
But Nicholas Cage is trying to hook up with this flight attendant.
2:09
That's the term these days gets kind of caught in the act by his daughter.
2:14
Then he just gets on the plane anyways, with his tickets to go see you, too.
2:18
I mean, he had to go.
2:20
I mean, he did have to do his job.
2:22
Well, at that point, but he was obviously lying the whole time
2:27
because he said he like just got called in that morning.
2:30
But then he got the tickets and he'd been trying to get them for like two weeks.
2:34
So and the show was in London. Yeah.
2:37
Yeah. Yeah. So clearly he had other plans.
2:39
He didn't give a shit and didn't care that his daughter was coming home
2:44
to surprise him. It was fine.
2:46
So they get on the plane.
2:47
Oh, Jesus. And then there's Chad Michael Murray.
2:50
He plays Jesus.
2:52
Yeah. He plays an investigative journalist
2:56
who does actually know investigative journalism ever.
3:01
And so they had to give him a job that was plot reasonable.
3:07
They call him an investigative journalist.
3:08
He's just a disaster journalist. Yes.
3:11
Like he goes around and films like earthquakes and shit.
3:14
That's not investigative journalism.
3:15
You know why the earthquake happened and where and who.
3:20
And stuff. So it's it's pretty pretty weak.
3:23
But wait, Nick, who made the earthquake?
3:27
Russell Brand.
3:29
Oh, I didn't even put that together. Wow.
3:31
Oh, no, I've been thinking about what a dick Russell Brand was this whole time.
3:35
It was awful. Yes.
3:37
Listen to episode two for context. Yeah. Yeah.
3:41
There's all sorts of like callbacks these days now that we've got such a
3:45
such a such a large library of content to get you back into it.
3:51
Which just a harp on episode two's point again,
3:54
this is the third episode and they're hour long episodes.
3:56
Go listen to the first two.
3:58
Yeah. I mean, you could probably take a dump and listen to a whole episode in one go.
4:03
So Rayford Steel flies his stupid plane up into the air.
4:11
Something tells me this isn't the movie you like.
4:13
I love this movie.
4:15
All his stupid daughter, Chloe, is still on the ground and she's all upset.
4:19
She like has a bone to pick with Christianity.
4:21
Her mom like got all like born again and just went wild with it. Yeah.
4:28
Which is really kind of she blames that for her parents failing marriage.
4:33
And I don't know, but she went to college.
4:35
So it's not like she stuck around to try and help rekindle the passion.
4:40
But her poor little brother, Rami, is. Oh, yeah.
4:42
The short version of this is Rayford has a bad day at work
4:47
because the rapture happens. Yeah.
4:50
Yeah. So but it's the dumbest rapture ever.
4:54
Can we talk about that Photoshop job of the family?
4:57
Oh, the family photo. It's so good.
4:59
He looks like he's coming through like an ethereal, like
5:04
gauzy veil as he just shifts.
5:08
That's the photo we should have used.
5:10
Oh, God, that would have been good.
5:12
We'll put it up on Twitter. Yeah. Yeah. OK.
5:14
Oh, yeah. We have a Twitter now.
5:15
Yeah. It was at whatever we made that.
5:18
While Rayford is in the air and to get away from her mother,
5:23
Chloe takes Rami to the mall where there is a sick hip hop dance group.
5:30
They were great doing.
5:32
They were actually the best like performers of the movie.
5:36
Shockingly true.
5:38
But, you know, that's just so we know that this movie is hip
5:42
and with it, the best rapture scene they could have had is during the hip hop
5:45
dancer team when the guy goes sliding across the floor on his head.
5:49
Oh, yeah. If the rapture happened right then and he got raptured,
5:51
that would have been sick.
5:52
Absolutely. Hat just sliding bucket hat upside down, sliding across the floor.
5:57
Fuck, yeah. I want that.
6:00
She loses track for a brother for a second, finds them.
6:03
And when she goes to embrace him, because, you know, they love each other.
6:07
The screen kind of flashes and there's a wow.
6:09
And suddenly there's just clothes in her arms.
6:13
Yeah, clothes that were like still standing up.
6:15
It's like that's a lot of starch.
6:17
I don't think that kids hit puberty.
6:18
So those socks have no right to be that stiff.
6:21
Well, OK, that goes to my.
6:24
What's your point coming off of a beat off joke?
6:28
So that's my point about this whole movie.
6:30
Within this film, all children get raptured.
6:34
All children get saved, which I was raised in the Catholic Church.
6:38
Not true. Some of them get saved.
6:42
Original sin is a thing.
6:44
There had to be some 12 year old somewhere.
6:47
Now, wait, who was just discovered himself when the rapture happened?
6:51
Who's still in his bathroom?
6:52
Yeah. So, OK, two things.
6:55
I think that puberty is the cutoff, because once you've hit puberty,
6:59
you've obviously whacked off.
7:01
I discovered myself early and often.
7:03
I mean, I to be fair, I had a mustache at nine.
7:06
So you earned it while in midair.
7:10
Rapture happens.
7:11
A sizable chunk of people disappear off the plane.
7:15
So obviously, everyone's freaking out.
7:18
The cockpit gets bum rushed because the pilot clearly knows what's going on.
7:22
There's the bum rushing, though.
7:23
And the way he gets them to go back to their seats is and maybe this is what pilots can do.
7:28
And I did not fact check this.
7:30
He made it so that everyone needed to use their oxygen.
7:34
Oh, yeah. He like depressurized the cabin.
7:36
Yeah. Well, you know, can that just happen at any time?
7:39
That would be terrifying.
7:40
No shit. Like one really depressed pilot's like, fuck it.
7:45
Depressurized. Take everybody with me.
7:48
They're only six hours out from New York, so they bust a bitch and head back to New York.
7:53
They were three hours out of three hours.
7:55
Yeah, OK. They're flying back to New York.
7:59
You're paying more attention than me.
8:01
I've watched it twice.
8:02
What can I say? I'm sorry.
8:04
Yeah, it was rough. That second viewing was definitely over two trips.
8:09
While flying back, they have a run in with another plane
8:13
that no longer has its crew.
8:16
Yeah. Or at least it's pilots.
8:18
Some God lovers on that flight.
8:20
Yeah. But all Jesus Airways. Yeah. Virgin Airlines.
8:24
He's trying to get back to New York.
8:25
Can't get in touch with anybody on the ground.
8:28
They do hit their wing, strikes the other plane
8:33
and they're leaking fuel rapidly.
8:36
That's not leaking. They're just draining, draining fuel.
8:39
Yeah. At one point, the fuel ignites.
8:42
No, there's like a cool fireball in the back of the thing.
8:44
But it's not the plane that's on fire.
8:46
It's just the fuel.
8:48
And, you know, Rayford knows this because Chad Michael Murray
8:51
used his stupid camera to take a photo of it and tell him there.
8:56
Now we've justified him being an investigative journalist.
8:59
All the while, Chloe, who was holding the clothes,
9:03
which I have to assume involves underwear,
9:05
even though you never see underwear on any of these
9:09
saved individuals.
9:11
Man, is everyone just like swinging free in the.
9:15
Sounds like heaven to me.
9:16
Even though she's like holding the clothes, she decides
9:23
she's going to initially she's going to try and drive.
9:26
But for reasons that happen a lot, that doesn't happen.
9:30
Jesus. Yeah. So like she's in the mall.
9:33
Oh, Chloe looking for her brother, who, again,
9:38
is does she just assume he's now naked roaming the streets?
9:41
But like goes to the nearest hospital
9:45
and breaks in to find her brother,
9:49
who again disappeared while in her arms.
9:53
It's kind of weird to me that they locked the door to the hospital.
9:57
Also, like there's only 30 people in the front of that thing. Yeah. Yeah.
10:01
And she's just like, I can't stand in this line.
10:04
No window smash. Yeah.
10:07
But OK, so the sidebar there,
10:10
I like that she's just fucking rolling around
10:14
and she looks at the TV and the news is up and it's like chaos at the hospital.
10:20
And the next scene, she's at the hospital.
10:23
It's like her initial thought is just, oh, my God, the hospital is off the hook.
10:29
I got to go there.
10:30
Ramy could be there.
10:31
It's like, why would Ramy have gone to the hospital?
10:34
I hate her.
10:35
Oh, and she sees the ambulance.
10:38
It's like, is he in there?
10:39
Oh, yeah. Is it Ramy?
10:41
The cops are getting the fuck back.
10:43
It's like the only time I've respected a cop is when he tells her to back the fuck up.
10:48
So God damn, this movie sucks.
10:51
She makes she makes her way home to find.
10:55
Her mom was ready because her mom was like warning her about the
10:58
the rapture at the beginning of the film.
11:01
And then right when it was time to go up, her mom was like,
11:04
I'm going to clean myself for Jesus takes a shower.
11:07
So, you know, no clothes up behind just just the necklace that
11:12
Chloe made, which was a plot point.
11:14
She would have been real like moist, though, like she was raptured wet.
11:20
Yeah.
11:21
Damp for Jesus. Damp for Jesus.
11:24
Leah Thompson, too, from Back to the Future.
11:27
Yeah, it was a rough time, I guess, in 2014.
11:31
OK, so yeah, she goes to the hospital.
11:36
Not there goes home, goes home.
11:38
Mom's jewelry is just sitting in the shower.
11:40
Oh, did we neglect to say she was in a shower?
11:42
Was I just talking about how wet she was?
11:44
Yeah, no, we talked about that.
11:46
She was in the shower.
11:48
Oh, got raptured.
11:49
Gets a voicemail from her dad who has a satellite phone.
11:51
Yeah, because he's a pilot.
11:52
He's a pilot. And Chad Michael Murray also has a satellite phone
11:55
because he's an investigative journalist.
11:57
Investigative journalist.
11:57
Also, we forgot to mention that Chloe and Chad Michael Murray's character Buck
12:03
met in the airport and kind of hit it off, including after she blows him off.
12:08
He gives her a kiss on the cheek because that's a completely normal thing
12:11
to do to a stranger.
12:14
But she gets a voicemail from her dad.
12:16
If you're Joe Biden, I guess.
12:19
The second the.
12:20
Topical humor.
12:22
I'm the Murphy Brown of podcasts.
12:24
She gets a voicemail from her father,
12:27
which is right before the impact with the other plane.
12:29
So she thinks her dad's dead.
12:31
So she does the only logical thing left.
12:34
Walk to a bridge and climb to the top of it.
12:36
Oh, yeah.
12:38
All the while back in the air, Buck
12:41
and Rayford, I keep wanting to say Raymond, but Rayford.
12:44
Yeah, I know.
12:45
Try to keep the crew and the passengers of the flight
12:50
together and safe.
12:51
All while quickly running out of fuel, going down.
12:55
This movie goes out of its way to introduce characters that you
13:01
this is all Christian propaganda.
13:03
I missed that part.
13:05
So it goes out of its way to introduce characters
13:07
that clearly aren't going to get raptured.
13:10
It takes an hour for the rapture to happen.
13:12
Oh, you are. Yeah. OK.
13:14
Yeah. It's a full hour before anybody gets raptured.
13:19
But they seem to go out of the way to like be like, see, we're not judging people.
13:22
But the one actual God spearing character on the plane
13:27
doesn't get raptured, who just happens to be Muslim.
13:31
I mean, he probably did something else in his life.
13:34
What about the old lady?
13:35
Her husband got raptured. That was fucked up.
13:38
So there's an old lady dementia.
13:40
Yeah, she's old, has dementia husband.
13:43
I'm not going to like say I'm buying into every stereotype, but he was Jewish.
13:48
They made a Jewish stereotype.
13:51
He got raptured, which I'm pretty sure is a New Testament thing.
13:55
But the sweet old lady doesn't get raptured.
13:59
Nope. Satanist.
14:00
And she probably likes butt stuff.
14:03
God hates butt stuff.
14:04
Oh, Chloe.
14:06
Chloe goes to see her mother's pastor.
14:09
Oh, yeah. Pastor doesn't get.
14:10
He doesn't get raptured because, you know, you have to.
14:12
You can't just say it. You have to believe in your heart.
14:14
Yeah. Yeah. He stopped believing.
14:16
Although I wanted to make some assumptions about him, but they weren't Catholic.
14:19
So, you know, Remy was probably fun.
14:21
He's going to talk in the same scene about like how, you know, he he doesn't believe
14:26
he doesn't feel it.
14:27
But then he's also going to say like God took your mom and brother
14:31
to save them and protect them.
14:33
And it's like, well, which is it? Do you believe or not believe?
14:35
Yeah. Well, you have to believe now.
14:38
Do you? I mean, I don't know.
14:40
I believe less. Yeah.
14:42
Oh, I believe in the power of good drugs.
14:46
Yeah. So Rayford seems to be the only person who puts two and two together
14:49
on the plane as to what's going on.
14:51
Also, the drug. Yeah.
14:53
Drug addled British lady.
14:54
Yes. But you can't trust a British person.
14:57
So who was and they don't
15:01
refer to his realization of it.
15:03
He was just sort of like, it's like, well, it must be the rapture
15:07
because my wife told me about the rapture.
15:10
Jesus. Yes. Yeah.
15:12
And this is also pilots watch as, of course, John three, 16.
15:17
Yes, that's it.
15:19
In like gold foil.
15:21
Yeah, it was so bad.
15:23
It's so shitty.
15:25
That scene, it was killing me because he's like going through the wallet
15:28
and just throwing random stuff.
15:29
And one of the things he pulls out is like a laminated card
15:32
that just says visa.
15:34
Oh, yeah. And just looks like the old like visa logo in card form.
15:39
It was pretty good.
15:41
At least we knew what it was because in 2014, nobody's ever seen a debit card
15:46
before. So Chloe in her bad day
15:51
almost gets hit by a car that goes careening through the mall.
15:54
Yeah. A car that had no driver, but the engine revs as it speeds through them all.
15:59
And the woman, the passenger is already dead before it crashes.
16:03
I didn't even notice a passenger.
16:05
Yeah, there's a bleeding passengers already dead.
16:07
No airbags go off in this car.
16:10
Then goes to her car because she, you know, drove there.
16:13
So a single prop airplane comes careening out of the sky into her car.
16:18
And then while walking to the hospital under a bridge,
16:22
some guy, somebody on a moped revs up, drives by, steals her purse.
16:26
And then this has to be at least 20 minutes since the beginning of the rapture.
16:30
I mean, you could really call this like Chloe's no good, very bad day.
16:34
The biggest laugh of this entire movie comes from the short person getting thrown.
16:40
No, that's that's good.
16:41
But no, my favorite scene is when Chloe is walking through the city,
16:45
there is some disheveled clothes of an unhoused person next to the end is near sign.
16:52
And somebody has scratched out the word near and written here.
16:55
Did did the homeless guy do it before he went?
17:00
He's like, what? One second, God.
17:04
All right. What's that here?
17:06
But where did someone stop while freaking out to update this guy's sign?
17:12
Finally get back in touch with Chloe on the ground.
17:15
They need a runway because there's nothing at the airport
17:18
and they don't have enough gas to go inland.
17:21
So she finds a stretch of highway that's being worked on to land them on.
17:27
She gets a big truck to move stuff out of the way and then lights
17:31
lights a big fire for them to see so they can see the landing strip.
17:35
They land. Everyone survives.
17:39
It's kind of a crash landing. That's not a good one.
17:41
Now, I mean, they lose their landing gear on some power lines.
17:45
Yeah, but but everyone survives and we kind of have a happy ending
17:48
only to view the world that is now on fire because it is the Rapture.
17:52
And there are seven years of hell on Earth coming. Honestly, the
17:57
when they get off the plane
17:59
is literally the only part like the only part of this movie
18:03
where I saw something that made me say, hell, yeah, it's
18:07
the Muslim guy throws the little person off the side of the airplane.
18:12
So my biggest question about this film
18:16
is who are these made for?
18:18
Is this just weird like snuff porn for Christians?
18:22
Like, haha, these losers are going to go through seven years of hell.
18:26
Like, the producers seem to know well enough that you need to make the characters
18:31
somewhat relatable and likable because they're not horrible.
18:35
The performances aren't terrible and the characters aren't the worst.
18:39
We're watching different movies.
18:41
That wasn't good.
18:42
That wasn't good, but you guys upsold this so much
18:46
as to how terrible it's going to be.
18:47
And I was just like, this is fine.
18:48
The characters are just like skin deep.
18:52
Yes. Like there's nothing to them.
18:54
There's no character.
18:55
I mean, so was Jujitsu.
18:56
I love that movie.
18:58
Jujitsu didn't bother giving us fake occupations for people
19:03
that we have to like somehow
19:07
decide this is who they are based on what they do. Right.
19:11
I mean, you have Jordan Sparks playing a mom whose kid gets raptured.
19:15
And then she thinks that it's some conspiracy theory from her NFL
19:19
quarterback husband, ex-husband.
19:21
She's the one who pulls the gun in the third act that I didn't see coming.
19:24
Right. These characters like this.
19:26
It makes no sense.
19:28
I mean, I guess they're from the book. But at the end of the film,
19:31
so bad at the end of the film, they all survive, which
19:36
the director, the writers seem to know you have to have some type of narrative
19:40
with protagonists that you have to root for
19:43
for there to be a story arc.
19:45
But at the end of all of it, they're still all going to hell.
19:50
Supposedly.
19:51
I mean, maybe he can like Rayford and Chad, Michael Murray.
19:56
Buck can, I don't know, rekindle the faith in humanity.
20:02
I'm never going to read.
20:03
Yeah. Can you know, can you like win the rapture?
20:05
I don't think so. Can you pray real hard?
20:08
I'm not sure. I don't understand
20:12
the impetus of these films.
20:13
Is it to is it to convert us?
20:16
Because they do not do a good job of depicting Christians in this film
20:20
as reasonable people you'd want to hang out with.
20:24
One of the first scenes in the film is Chad Michael Murray's character signing
20:27
like newspapers with articles he's written.
20:30
And this woman comes in because people give a shit about that. Yes.
20:34
But this woman comes up and she like just starts browbeating him with like,
20:38
it's God's plan and blah, blah, blah.
20:41
And Chloe walks up and she's like, hey, leave the guy alone.
20:45
You're crazy.
20:47
And, you know, we live in a fallen world. Yeah.
20:51
And that's their depiction of a good Christian.
20:54
On the second view, and I really felt
20:56
bad for acknowledging this, but the movie got a lot better
21:00
when the Christians were gone.
21:02
That's kind of my point. Yeah.
21:05
Like you can't base a movie around these people who are fine
21:09
and don't have problems.
21:10
Well, problems that they perceive.
21:12
Everything thematic about this movie is so disgustingly heavy handed.
21:16
Yes. That I think it should put anybody off.
21:20
But to answer your question, these movies get made
21:23
because there's a big market for Christian film.
21:27
Nick is building a collection of Nick Cage films.
21:30
This was one of them, so I didn't have to rent it so I could just watch the blu ray.
21:35
There's one quote.
21:36
There's one review on the back of the box that I'd like to read to you guys.
21:40
An action packed thriller that will take viewers on a wild ride
21:44
through the day of the rapture.
21:45
Willie Robertson, Duck Dynasty. Yeah.
21:49
That was their get.
21:51
Which I mean, as far as like Christian gets is pretty big.
21:55
Like that guy has like four books out
21:58
that are always sitting next to each other at Hobby Lobby.
22:01
Of course. I did see an interview with him.
22:04
I'm surprised you know anything about Willie Duckman.
22:09
I did never be surprised by me knowing dumb shit.
22:13
I mean, there is not terrible action in this film.
22:15
You can see where the budget runs out.
22:17
Like the plane goes from looking like a plane to like early
22:21
or to late 90s CG real quick.
22:23
The director only has six credits.
22:26
On his IMDb for directing, he has a bunch in stunt man work and stunt coordination.
22:30
Antibiotic
22:31
Yeah, he's a stunt man. He's a stunt man.
22:35
But his only other notable thing on his IMDb is he directed
22:39
an episode of the Young Indiana Jones Adventures.
22:41
So that makes sense because he was a stunt man.
22:44
Yes. On the Indiana Jones movie.
22:46
Yes. Right. So like his book, which I thought was this is probably
22:49
the most fascinating thing about this is my life as Indiana Jones, James Bond,
23:00
Everyone cool.
23:01
That is pretty great.
23:02
Yeah.
23:03
These are the things you think about when you're bored.
23:07
And you're going to be bored a lot when you watch Left Behind.
23:11
Basically don't watch Left Behind.
23:13
No.
23:14
There is a Left Behind 2, Rise of the Antichrist, in pre-production right now, directed and
23:20
starring Kevin Sorbo as Rayford Steele.
23:24
Oh Jesus, Kevin Sorbo.
23:26
Oh God, that makes me infuriated.
23:29
I mean, we went from Kirk Cameron to Nicolas Cage, the improvement to Kevin Sorbo.
23:36
Which is really worse than Kirk Cameron.
23:39
Yeah.
23:40
Yeah.
23:41
Wow, that sucks.
23:42
Yeah.
23:43
Nick, this is a hard one for this.
23:44
Jesus, I don't have a quote.
23:45
Do you have a quote?
23:46
No.
23:47
I did have one quote and it is not from the movie, but it is from Nicolas Cage being interviewed
23:54
about this film while doing the press junket.
23:57
And he was asked about how most actors would shy away from religious films.
24:04
And his quote, trying to sell this film as something he cared about was that thing of
24:11
beauty.
24:12
If you look carefully at my filmography, I do gravitate at times towards spiritual and
24:17
spirituality as spiritually themed movies like City of Angels or Knowing, or even movies
24:23
like Ghost Rider.
24:25
Deep spirituality in that one.
24:30
That was.
24:31
Oh, that made me so happy.
24:33
Like, wow, you do not care.
24:37
Oh my God.
24:39
So yeah, that was left behind.
24:42
It's a movie.
24:43
It's a movie.
24:44
Don't watch it.
24:45
Anything else you want to say about it before we get to our second film?
24:50
In the mall, when everybody gets raptured and all the kids and stuff, there's kids
24:55
clothing falling from the ceiling.
25:00
Why were the kids in the ceiling?
25:02
Just parents that are sick of their kids that day.
25:04
It could have been one of those cool malls that had like, you know, like a roller coaster.
25:09
Did not appear to be one.
25:11
I don't think there was anything cool in this movie.
25:15
I agree.
25:16
I there.
25:17
Except for the little person.
25:19
That's a pig.
25:20
That's a movie, too.
25:21
That is a movie.
25:22
And it's it's in fact a movie we're going to cover right now.
25:26
Nice.
25:27
It's a it's a sad film, but for different reasons and left behind.
25:33
I mean, it's and by that, I mean, it's a movie that is kind of sad and is emotional.
25:39
Well, we're in serious movies right now.
25:41
We are in serious movies.
25:42
This is why we break him down and switch up, because some weeks are going to be harder
25:47
than others.
25:48
We're going to have a new 9-11 film that's coming up someday.
25:53
But yeah, the long and short of Pig, Nicholas Cage plays a weird isolationist living out
25:58
in the Oregon woods with his truffle pig.
26:01
They have a great relationship.
26:03
Pig even has its own little bed next to Nick Cage's.
26:07
Nick Cage makes delicious foods and feeds his pig and they have a great life together.
26:15
Nick Cage plays Rob and once a week, Amir, young businessman from Portland, comes to
26:23
buy his truffles and bring in supplies.
26:26
They don't seem to like each other buys the truffles with supplies.
26:31
It's like, here's some D cell batteries for your ghetto blaster.
26:38
Rob and his pig enjoy a nice little life together.
26:40
One night, Rob lays his sweet head down when his door gets kicked in.
26:48
Pig gets bagged and he gets frying pan to the skull with an amazing foley as he gets
26:57
hit.
26:59
Wakes up the next day, contacts Amir who shows up in his yellow.
27:04
I think it's a Camaro.
27:06
It's Camaro.
27:07
It's Camaro.
27:08
It's Camaro is really angry that he has to like drive all this way and.
27:14
Takes Rob to the big city, the Portland.
27:16
Well, he takes him on a circuit real quick to other truffle hunters and kind of gets
27:24
like because he had a brief description of the truck, a turquoise pickup.
27:28
So they find the meth heads who stole the pig.
27:31
Yeah, through a very short series of events.
27:35
Yes.
27:36
Two stops.
27:37
They go to the meth heads and confront them, but they're like, oh, we don't have the pig
27:41
anymore.
27:42
And that's about all the help they were.
27:46
So they returned to Portland for Rob to introduce Amir to the seedy underbelly of the Portland
27:51
restaurant scene, which involves literal underground fight clubs.
27:58
Fight being a misnomer.
28:00
Well, I mean, growing up in Portland and having worked in, you know, one or two kitchens.
28:07
Yeah.
28:08
I get just punched in the face for money.
28:11
But no, obviously, if you were paying attention, the restaurant workers pay to punch homeless
28:17
people.
28:18
Oh, OK.
28:19
Yeah, it was like a letting out frustration.
28:22
Having to deal with rich folks being in your restaurant, just being an asshole.
28:26
It's still not a fight.
28:27
You're dealing with a pretty chef, all that kind of stuff.
28:30
Still doesn't seem like a fight club.
28:32
No, no, it's definitely just like buying the right to punch.
28:37
OK, knock a dude's teeth in who nobody's going to care about because he's a homeless dude
28:42
and he just made 300 bucks.
28:44
Yeah.
28:45
OK, this makes a little more sense.
28:46
Yeah.
28:47
I mean, it does.
28:48
It's horrible.
28:49
So, yeah, I've punched a homeless guy for money.
28:52
No.
28:53
Well, you paid you paid for the privilege.
28:54
Yeah.
28:55
He made some money.
28:56
No rapture for me.
28:59
Rob goes revealing that he is, in fact, famous chef Robin Feld, who mysteriously disappeared
29:06
10 years ago, presumably to go live in the woods with a pig.
29:11
Fifteen.
29:12
Fifteen years ago.
29:13
I'm the detail guy.
29:15
Clearly, I have notes.
29:17
He gets the name of a restaurant, which is a highfalutin gastropub.
29:24
So he gets a mirror to use his connections to get him to get them lunch reservations.
29:29
I also like the scene.
29:30
We kind of skipped over it when Rob goes to his old home.
29:33
Oh, oh, stranger danger.
29:35
Yeah.
29:36
That's a weird thing.
29:37
That was a weird scene, but it did make me think like maybe left behind.
29:41
Got it right.
29:42
All kids do go to heaven because that kid fucking rules.
29:44
All right.
29:45
Yeah.
29:46
There's a kid playing a handpan in a backyard and Rob's just wandering through his old
29:50
neighborhood and pokes that around the corner.
29:53
Again, I mean, being freshly beaten, an eight year old just hanging out on the back porch
29:57
by himself.
29:58
The kid did turn and look at him and be like, does your face hurt?
30:02
Yes.
30:03
He's like, yeah.
30:04
And they talk about a persimmon tree, which.
30:05
Yeah.
30:06
Because what you talk to kids about is weird fruits.
30:09
Yeah.
30:10
Like persimmons, which are delicious.
30:12
I used to have a persimmon tree in my backyard.
30:14
No, that.
30:16
Yeah.
30:17
Outside of stranger danger.
30:18
That was really cool scene.
30:20
So they show up to lunch the next day.
30:22
Very fancy place.
30:23
The woman, the waitress describes for almost two solid minutes this deconstructed scallop
30:31
dish, with like an egg corn fusion bullshit, bullshit, bullshit.
30:38
All the while, Rob, who was disheveled to start with, hasn't cleaned up the blood from
30:44
his frying pan wound or the blood from getting his face punched in and is still just wearing
30:52
his dirty, dirty old union suit.
30:56
I love that he wears a union.
30:57
Yeah.
30:58
He just wears old dirty ass like.
31:01
Union suit.
31:04
Keep it weird.
31:05
Can't say it any better.
31:06
Yes.
31:07
Keep it weird, Portland.
31:08
No dress code.
31:09
So dress code or curl.
31:10
I did a little little reading about this particular aspect because they were like, why didn't
31:14
you have Rob clean himself up?
31:16
And apparently they were doing test makeup on Nick Cage and just like got them all fucking
31:22
beat up looking and then took a break and went and got coffee and nobody said anything
31:27
or asked anything or raised an eyebrow.
31:30
And they were like, well, fuck in Portland.
31:32
Yeah.
31:33
So that just became the thing.
31:34
It was like, well, Rob wouldn't give a shit.
31:36
So here we go.
31:37
I didn't know the the story of the caked blood test makeup.
31:43
That's amazing.
31:44
It really makes it a little better.
31:47
And like previously, I probably would have griped about him not cleaning up.
31:52
But then, I mean, you get into the character of him himself.
31:55
It's like all his clothes are fucking filthy.
31:57
You never asked for a different shirt.
32:00
The restaurant scene is probably my favorite scene from the film because they wind up questioning
32:06
the chef who also should be said Amir's father, who's also in the restaurant tour game, sells
32:13
to this restaurant specifically.
32:15
So Amir is not supposed to be there.
32:16
They're not supposed to cross the streams.
32:18
But Rob confronts the chef who turns out to have been fired by Rob from his restaurant.
32:25
Years ago, it was the chef's first job.
32:27
Got fired for always overcooking the pasta.
32:30
And Rob completely eviscerates this guy by being like, what did you tell me when I fired
32:35
you?
32:36
You wanted to open an old English pub.
32:38
What happened to that dream?
32:39
These people don't care about you.
32:41
Tears this guy down.
32:44
But of course, all signs point to Amir's father being the individual who hired aforementioned
32:51
the meth addicts to kidnap the pig.
32:55
Yeah.
32:56
The chef was being real dodgy about it all.
32:58
Yeah.
32:59
About where he was getting those truffles for the fall menu.
33:02
So Rob rightfully loses his shit on Amir, kicks the shit out of Amir's car.
33:08
Yeah.
33:09
And then he goes to Amir to give up his father's address.
33:12
Rob steals a bike and an amazing scene where Rob just runs up on some guy's porch, grabs
33:18
the bike.
33:19
The guy tries to stop him and fully cages out and just screams in his face and walks
33:23
away.
33:24
Yeah.
33:25
To be fair, if a guy who was whose face entire face was caked in blood, just grabbed my bike
33:33
and yelled at me, I mean, it's fine.
33:35
It's yours now.
33:36
He goes and meets Amir's dad, who is a real son of a bitch, and tells him if he ever comes
33:42
back, he's going to, well, offers him a bunch of money and tells him if he ever comes back,
33:46
he's going to turn the pig to bacon.
33:48
All right.
33:49
So no, the scene that I loved, he's in his old restaurant talking to his old baker and
33:52
he's just looking and it's the entire conversation is a single camera from a weird like Dutch
33:58
angle over the shoulder.
34:00
And he just like, you changed it.
34:02
And she's like, it wasn't me.
34:04
You're a chef.
34:05
I'm a baker.
34:07
And it's just this great little moment of him sitting in a thing he built that is no
34:13
longer there.
34:14
And it's sad and beautiful.
34:17
But something else has come from it and someone else has succeeded in that space.
34:21
And I really appreciated that.
34:23
Yeah, she explains that she had kept the restaurant the same and operated the same for a couple
34:29
years just because she thought he was going to come back.
34:32
But but of course, he did not.
34:34
So so she was left behind.
34:39
Cage comes in and like in this attempt to get like this last ditch attempt to get information
34:48
about the pig out of Amir's dad, he prepares this meal because we've established like with
34:58
the chef from the other restaurant that Rob has an insane memory.
35:03
He doesn't forget people.
35:05
And he'll say in this scene, like he remembers everybody he served and he remembers every
35:11
meal he's ever made for a person.
35:14
So when he goes and he makes this meal for Amir's dad, like he gets Amir in and like
35:22
sends him on a shopping list, but teaches him how to make this meal, this meal that
35:27
was like the only time Amir has ever described his parents as being happy was after this
35:34
meal.
35:35
So he's just I don't think he's doing it maliciously.
35:38
He's trying to like extend an olive branch and he's like, hey, man, remember this really
35:44
good time you had with your wife, who I do not know is just a fucking vegetable hospital
35:51
room.
35:53
And you get to see his dad go through and you like you see him like try the different
35:59
things.
36:00
He eats the pigeon and it's what it was.
36:06
You know, you see the look on his face and he's like, oh man, like this pigeon fucking
36:10
rocks.
36:11
Like I didn't think pigeon was so good, but that's great.
36:14
And then like he takes another bite of something and it's like, okay, this is also great.
36:19
It's like slowly like just coming up out of like the depths in him where he's starting
36:24
to recognize this meal.
36:27
And then he drinks this like special wine that Rob had had Amir get from like his private
36:37
like wine cellar.
36:40
When Amir's dad drinks this wine, it's like everything just fucking comes back to him
36:44
and he's like, I know exactly when I had this meal and it was the last good meal.
36:49
So he like he drinks the wine and he's just like, fuck.
36:52
He's just wrecked inside because all he can think about is now his wife and just this
37:00
connection that the three of them had that can never happen again.
37:06
Yeah.
37:07
I think that was probably the more emotional moment for me.
37:11
Yeah.
37:12
That one hit for me too.
37:14
And one of the pieces of that that I thought was kind of interesting is that as Rob is
37:18
pouring that wine, he says, your son found this.
37:22
Yeah.
37:23
Yeah.
37:24
He gives the kid the credit for everything.
37:25
Yeah.
37:26
So Rob, to rehumanize this person reminds him of the one good meal he had with his comatose
37:32
wife.
37:33
Dad completely breaks down, loses his shit only to reveal that the pig died, that it
37:39
was the meth heads.
37:40
The meth heads will be, you know, a little too rough with it.
37:43
I don't think it's that kind of roughness.
37:45
I think they were just like, it doesn't matter.
37:48
They were shitty meth heads doing shitty meth head things and they fucked this pig up.
37:53
So yeah, Nick Cage loses his shit.
37:56
And you know, this is a perfect time, cage opportunity to just let it out.
38:02
It's a silent scene.
38:04
It's a sad man.
38:06
Like real actual kind of emotional grieving.
38:10
Yeah.
38:11
Yeah.
38:12
This is a really stoic film.
38:13
I was kind of surprised that it didn't have more freak out moments.
38:17
Like he just like takes his lumps.
38:19
Yeah.
38:20
You know, that that's the most visceral scene for sure.
38:22
Yeah.
38:23
And it's silent.
38:24
Peter and I saw the trailer for this film together for the first time.
38:28
This movie was really kind of sold visually as man loses pig and John wicks around Portland.
38:37
And it is not that.
38:38
No, it's a real like drama.
38:41
Yeah.
38:42
Like just real case study and like what are our relationships with food, animals, parents,
38:52
significant others and what do we do when they go away?
38:55
It's a really beautiful scene where they're in a diner and Rob says, I'm going to paraphrase
39:05
here because I don't remember the exact quote, but you know, if I didn't go to Portland,
39:08
if I didn't go looking for in my head, she'd still be alive.
39:13
And it was just like, but she wouldn't pay.
39:16
Rob goes, she wouldn't pay.
39:18
That's that's I mean, that's that's where the crying started.
39:22
The last scene in this film is Rob returning back to his shack playing a tape of his deceased
39:31
wife that she recorded for his birthday of her playing guitar and singing I'm on fire
39:37
while he sits on his bed and looks at his now deceased pig's bed.
39:44
That scene kind of broke me.
39:46
I cried a lot.
39:48
And I hugged my dog for a solid 10 minutes.
39:52
Yeah, so that's pig.
39:55
It's a I mean, I thought it was a really solid movie.
39:58
It's not perfect, but I don't I don't know how you are with movies, Nick.
40:03
Did this feel emotional to you?
40:05
Yeah, do you have feelings?
40:08
Do you have feelings?
40:11
This is actually an intervention, Nick.
40:12
The last two episodes have just been set up for this conversation.
40:15
Just really to get me in here. Yeah.
40:18
Yeah, I mean, it's an emotional movie.
40:21
I love my dog.
40:22
I love my girlfriend.
40:24
I could see myself feeling similarly if I had lost either.
40:30
I think what actually
40:32
so the most emotional part of the movie for me
40:36
was when Nick Cage, because it's not like Nick Cage
40:41
just makes this meal for Amir's dad.
40:47
This whole like relationship with Amir and his dad and mom is kind of set up.
40:53
And like Amir has said that his mom is dead.
40:57
She killed herself where we eventually do find out that she's just in a vegetative state.
41:04
She's not even dead.
41:06
He can't like communicate, talk to her or anything like that.
41:09
And the father, I'm assuming, doesn't ever visit her.
41:12
Well, and she's only alive because the father pays for the pays for the medical care.
41:17
Right. Amir says, you know, why won't dad just let you die?
41:20
I wish he'd let you die.
41:22
Can we talk about Rob and Amir's relationship?
41:24
Like how it grows from Amir's trying to start a business?
41:29
Well, the first scene that you have Amir and Rob together, Rob doesn't talk to him.
41:34
It's like he sees Amir showing up, gets the cooler with the truffles,
41:39
sets it to the side, continues darning his pants while Amir comes up.
41:46
I mean, it's pretty funny watching him in the background
41:48
trying to walk around the pig without getting dirty.
41:52
And I mean, he just hates the pig.
41:55
He keeps calling it a little sucker and things like that.
41:58
And just comes up is a loudmouth, gets nothing from Rob,
42:04
sets down the cooler with his batteries and shit in it, batteries and flour.
42:09
And then Rob just takes it and goes inside and it's like slams the door.
42:12
Yeah, it's like a little, yeah, it's like you.
42:14
And he's a big like
42:18
he's concerned about like disasters.
42:21
They Amir talks about like, oh, we could just go to Mount Hood or whatever.
42:25
And like, well, well, sorry, let me back up.
42:29
Cage is talking about how like there's going to be an earthquake every like 200 years,
42:33
and it's going to send a tsunami inland that's going to flood
42:38
everything, presumably from the cascades over.
42:42
And Amir is like, well, we could go to hood.
42:44
And Nick Cage is like, hoods an active volcano.
42:47
And it's like, oh, fuck, that's pretty much.
42:49
Amir responds with, well, I'm not fucking moving to Seattle.
42:53
And Rob goes, fuck Seattle. Yeah.
42:56
That was pretty good.
42:57
I mean, that's one of the most honest moments of the movie,
43:02
because I don't know anybody in Portland who really likes Seattle.
43:05
And it goes both ways like Portland.
43:08
But then they they really build into like an actual friendship.
43:12
Yeah. Where they kind of know and respect each other a little bit.
43:16
And when Amir drops Rob off at the end of the film, the last thing Rob says to Amir is,
43:21
so I'll see you Thursday.
43:24
Yeah. Then Amir goes and cries in his car for a while.
43:28
I got fun facts.
43:30
It's some fun facts. Let's do some quotes.
43:33
You know, I think the only thing that I really wanted to say is like,
43:35
I thought the visuals in this were really good.
43:37
It's a very dark film. Yes.
43:39
And I wish it had been a little more lit,
43:41
but it's a first time director and like basically a first time DP.
43:45
Yeah. I mean, they did pretty fucking well.
43:48
I mean, that's kind of the most interesting thing about this film.
43:52
It was done on a shoestring budget.
43:54
Like it was done on so little money that I couldn't find
43:57
how much money it cost to make this thing.
44:00
An actual fun fact.
44:03
This is Nick Cage's 100th feature film.
44:06
Oh, the Century Mark.
44:09
Good job. You did it, buddy.
44:10
Yeah. The budget was so small, they couldn't afford a trained pig.
44:15
They had like a couple of weeks to try and train this pig,
44:19
who is only in like 10 minutes of the film.
44:21
But apparently this thing would just continue to bite Nicholas Cage.
44:26
Nicholas Cage was made a joke.
44:28
He'd been, you know, set on fire, flipped over in cars.
44:32
And ultimately, what was going to kill him was sepsis from being bitten by a pig.
44:37
As an act of respect to the pig,
44:39
the director requested that no ham or bacon be served
44:44
on set while the pig was on set.
44:47
Apparently, he did not win this fight.
44:51
Well, you know, your crew's got to have bacon.
44:54
At this point, let's do some quotes.
44:56
If you guys have any favorite quotes.
44:58
I mean, mine was Rob stealing the bike and when the guy goes, hey, he just goes.
45:04
That is good.
45:05
I just liked Rob at the restaurant.
45:08
Just getting into Derek,
45:11
just the like nihilist gravity of like him saying it.
45:17
And he just like cuts him apart.
45:19
He just says, Derek, why do you care about these people?
45:24
They don't care about you.
45:25
None of them.
45:27
They don't even know you because you haven't shown them.
45:30
Every day you wake up and there will be less of you.
45:35
You live your life for them
45:36
and they don't even see you, you don't even see yourself.
45:40
We don't get a lot of things to really care about.
45:43
That's like, damn.
45:45
Yeah, good.
45:46
That's actually the most he says in like one solid chunk, the entire movie.
45:51
Well, like I said, that was probably my favorite scene of the film.
45:54
Yeah, it was a great scene.
45:56
I think my favorite was Rob saying, I don't fuck my pig.
46:01
Yeah, that's true.
46:02
Yeah. Well, we're being like straight up accused of fucking.
46:06
A pig.
46:07
Yeah, you got to go to bat against that.
46:09
Yeah, at least set the record.
46:11
Yeah.
46:12
Yeah. OK.
46:13
So, I mean, that brings us to the point.
46:14
This is a competition.
46:16
So one movie has to advance.
46:18
And one movie will be left behind.
46:22
It's pig.
46:23
Pig will be left behind.
46:25
Left behind going all the way, baby.
46:27
All the way.
46:28
16 seeds every time.
46:30
No, no, no, pig, pig.
46:32
It's big. Please.
46:33
I could pig for.
46:34
I could watch pig right now.
46:37
I could watch pig immediately after finishing pig pig wins.
46:40
Yeah, that was what I think was most interesting to me is that this feels like a movie that
46:44
I could just have on and like enjoy.
46:47
Yeah. You know, it's like it's a sad movie and it's kind of not like gripping,
46:53
but it's good.
46:55
It's come. Every scene is compelling.
46:57
Yeah, you pay attention to it.
46:59
It's not a thriller.
47:01
OK, so that one wins.
47:03
Yeah, no, that one's not.
47:04
This is this is this this week is less of a competition
47:08
more than it was a slog to watch Christian cinema.
47:13
So next week on PageMatch.
47:16
Yes, it's Birdie and Wicker Man.
47:19
Yeah, it should be great. Never seen either.
47:21
It'll be an interesting one.
47:22
I'm curious to see what we get out of this.
47:25
Also, huge thanks to Peter for doing the amazing Photoshop work
47:29
that you see when you listen to our video and listen to our recordings.
47:34
Photoshop's so good, it could be in left behind.
47:39
Oh, it's better than that.
47:41
That is now the minutes thing you ever said.
47:44
So, yeah, I mean, as usual, follow us on everything.
47:48
All the podcast networks that you can find.
47:52
Smash that like button.
47:53
Yeah, we need five star ratings only even if you hate us.
47:57
Yeah. Do it out of spite.
47:58
Yeah, it's quite like us.
48:00
Hey, if you don't like my voice, five star rating.
48:03
Yeah, right.
48:03
Let's be really, really stick it to us.
48:05
Be honest. Most of the cage films you've all watched have been out of irony.
48:10
So ironically, give us five stars.
48:12
Yeah, we love irony.
48:15
PageMatch. Fun.
48:20
I still heard that.
48:22
Yeah.
48:24
I'm trying, guys.
48:25
Yeah, we might need a different strategy on this.
48:27
All right, straws from now on.
48:29
We have straws.
48:31
I apologize.
48:32
We should really start like dog bowls full of big sparkle.
48:38
I'm telling you, ASMR channel.
48:39
Yeah, that's great.
48:41
We're no longer a sports podcast.
48:43
We're not here for ASMR.
48:45
I'll ask my ex-spouse who listens to this, what they think of the mouth noises.
48:49
Oh, God, don't call them mouth noises.