Latest / The Collaborative Canvas Podcast / S3 E16 - Why Are We Never at Peace? | Mindfulness, Stress & Finding Balance | Nattasha Kapoor
Transcript
- speaker-0: So what do you think is happening as a society right now? speaker-1: We do not even have time for ourselves. 8 hours is ideally suggested. But if we than that's a good thing. How people laugh with hearts? Ha ha ha ha, and you the sound This is my plain time. I'll go there. Yeah, this is my me time. I'll scroll This is not self. speaker-0: Why we have such psychological barriers in our mind? speaker-1: Their emptiness will only be when we see the the person, who we are. speaker-0: A habit everyone should start today. speaker-1: you speaker-0: Welcome back to the Collaborative Canvas Podcast, where we explore the ideas, experiences, and perspectives shaping the way we live, work, and grow. In a world that is constantly asking us to do more, achieve more, and move faster, many people are quietly struggling with stress, anxiety, burnout loneliness, and the pressure of keeping everything together. We live in the most connected era in human history. Yet meaningful connections with ourselves and others often feel harder than ever. Today's conversation is about something that impact us and all of us. Not just leaders, founders or professionals, but every individual trying to navigate the demands of modern life while protecting their mental and emotional well-being. Joining me today is Natasha Kapoor. Natasha works at the intersection of mindfulness, emotional wellness and creative expressions along with workplace well-being. Through her work as a mindfulness coach, art therapist and corporate wellness practitioner, she helps individuals and organizations better understand stress, build emotional resilience and create healthier relationships with themselves and those around them. In this episode, we'll explore why so many people feel overwhelmed despite being having more opportunities than ever before and the hidden impact of that stress and emotional suppressions and how mindfulness can become a practical tool rather than just a buzzword and why. healing sometimes begin with something or as simple as slowing down and paying attention to the life which is going around. So whether you're feeling stressed by work, navigating personal challenges or simply looking to understand yourself a little better, this conversation is for you. So welcome, Natasha, onto the show. speaker-1: Thank you so much for inviting me, Ankeesh. Thank you so much to ⁓ the collaboration canvas for making me visit here and we'll talk about this in detail. speaker-0: Yes, Ntasha. I have seen few of the podcasts which are available on YouTube that you have spoken about and I love the kind of experiences that you shared with the experience you have also gained over a period of time while teaching a lot many people. to start with a bigger question, there is always a modern life problem these days and we all face, go through that. There is lot of stress, everybody is busy, everybody is like so occupied in their life that they barely get time to think around what they really need to do in future. So what do you think is happening as a society right now? speaker-1: As a society we all are rushing, we are all running. Don't you think we all are rushing towards one goal? When we get that, then we'll move out to another goal. Then we look for another goal. Today I an SUV. I thought, no man, SUV. Now I want Mercedes. Mercedes is let's something two-seater. So, desires are not being Till are we will keep And till we keep where we sitting How many of us actually sit with our own thoughts in a day? Not only thoughts, that go. Let us with How our family members? We are just running. We to we have But for ourselves or... For we have nothing. We do not even have time for ourselves. In we brush our half of the world scrolls. Right? You are eating breakfast with the family on a dining table. But everybody has their own device on the side. And we and doing This finger is very important these days. speaker-0: Yeah, the point is that when you are stressed that we have economically strong, our family, we have and it's only 24 hours So I think I was hearing something about that your own time to others. At that time you pick and you think that your mind will get relaxed, I'll scroll some I'll some good shots, reels. I feel that even 1 hour or 10 minutes for yourself, it doesn't happen. Then it goes long and long long. I am but I am not properly. Let me a shorty and then I realise that I am at So I killed my 4 hours right there in itself. How can I overcome those? I it, how I mind? speaker-1: First tell when you were your grandmother's house or wherever you in two months holidays, in what did you apart from speaker-0: Dasha, time there so physical activities. We on friends at 4 am. Then the evening we were running the house was filling water in and know what all work was speaker-1: What do speaker-0: phone to tie in a such close to there so stay there That's a very old story. But as you grow up and college graduates... speaker-1: Then we pick up a book and read it. Dadi Nani told that the stage was she would pick up and read the How many of us do it? No. We look the kindle too. So this device, many mental health people, doctors have already talked about the blue light in this will not make you sleep. It will not let you go to a theta state or a state of relaxation. It will keep you only into awake state. And after speaker-0: Mostly I say most. asked for women. speaker-1: that kind of an instruction ki nahi tumhe soana hai, but tab toh mere pas phone hai, tab toh scrolling chal rahi hai, how will you sleep? And sleep is such an important part of our life. Eight hours is ideally suggested. usse zyada so satte hain hain toh bahut achchi baat. speaker-0: What you today? speaker-1: It's even 4 hours. Frankly speaking. Because we time only in life. When we time at night of we feel that this my time. My time means I'll watch a movie, I'll watch a series, I'll take time out for my own style, own genre. Yeah, we think that let's scroll So people actually the news. speaker-0: Newspaper and I'm done. speaker-1: Actually, the one who a newspaper at he it some other work. Just to put it in the shelves, I believe. Right? So we the news. We the news format via WhatsApp or Instagram or any other social media, Facebook, whatever we are talking about. We do not have... I mean we have left this habit of reading. Why? I mean my suggestion to people is... speaker-0: I'm sure, I'm sure. speaker-1: Why don't you pick up a chhotosa book and start reading it? speaker-0: Somebody gave me a suggestion as well long back. He said that I can't There a time when Nandan used come in The one. Exactly. I used to read almost everything. Like for moms also. In the last, there was of Chacha Chaudhary. I used to read that. But over a period of time, realized that book reading has gone in the vein. speaker-1: from Parth Nanda. Read comics. You remember there was this book reader digest which has a column which talks about only jokes. How many How many people laugh at you? You be like a teacher in laughing your speaker-0: Yes, it was There are many stand-up comedians, people there too. they don't really... Imagination has died down. speaker-1: and visualize we do not Because we do not give stimulation to our thought process and visualization. We do not give our brain a food for thought. By reading that comic, that comic statement, am I visualizing it? Uncle Chaudhary and... ...am visualizing that there is something else something else Uncle Chaudhary could be a taller person, Uncle Chaudhary could be a shorter person Am I... Opening my brain. No. Before a small story of 4 pages. it's a small paragraph. that too. Give a habit to yourself or anybody. Just pick up 2 things. 2 words. Usually, schools or parents say that if 2 words daily, vocabulary will also get Right? speaker-0: I mean, time... speaker-1: Please speaking, recently there is a group wherein we all do chanting together. So, Lalita Sahastranaam chanting. And it is a very difficult text to understand. And it is a Rahasya Me text, right? And it's a Sanskrit name, thousand names of Lalita Ma. Okay. And ⁓ she is one of the 10 Mahavidyas, very powerful. And Rahasya Me, when I saying, it's more of a... It has everything. She is the world. Actually when I talk about her I just see she is the world, she is the creator, she is everything. So to understand that one of the fellow chanting member said, ki bhai ma poora nahi pad satta Sanskrit itna, mere baski nahi hai, mai nahi samajh paunga. Even the text guided by this book of Osiju, right, he has written poora mat padho. Everyday maa ke do naam padho, teen naam padho aur uska matlab samjh. So start slow. So you go bigger. It's a kaizen. Kaizen means Japanese technique. Where you take baby steps every day towards your goal. But you reach towards your goal one day with the hope that you are in a learning process. So pick up one thing daily. I'm not pushing to read. You can just sit before sleeping. Don't touch your gadget. Just write a few affirmations. speaker-0: But you a classic example. The thing which I was talking about. Somebody told me to only one page. Now I am somebody who would read that page and then he will start And when he starts he will think that he story somewhere And immediately he will speaker-1: That's you your away from and sleep. Though frankly it's very difficult because alarm is also everything in But my still a very humble suggestion because we can't than this. Self-love is very important. If we imbibe we will just keep away. And that is one part wherein we have to have that realization that we shouldn't touch You know your phone gives this data that how many hours you have used it in a day. Right? A self-realization comes there too. How many people check it? speaker-0: Honestly, I made a very valid point. I have that I Instagram. So, I started realizing that I cut down on I two things at the top of One Instagram. Sorry, one LinkedIn and other Instagram YouTube. These the top two. Then I started evaluating why they I not so much time that I videos regularly. Someone else And YouTube of course, I stay all to see how its metrics are And LinkedIn, I am like always. Why Instagram? Then I started realizing that Instagram, when I am connecting my thoughts with what I read, then eventually there is a book I was reading, How to Talk to People Anyways. Now there are many good examples in And when you those examples, you think that maybe I some podcast. Now you first podcast. and you this clip and as soon you scrolled further, you were that this is an algorithm, you understood what I seeing, Now it me some follow-up. But 2, 3 and then that trend change. Now that trend change is somewhere else and I with So now technically what I am bringing myself down to is that I was stressed all I book and but then I got redirected. So I my discipline. speaker-1: Okay. speaker-0: Secondly, I think I a rule book, which I broke. But now I am that I have wasted time and my stress has overcome. And as somebody who really wanted to fix things up, how do you ensure that you step 1, step 2, step 3? Because mindfulness is not that easy. Controlling your mind is... I I have seen a lot of people, it not possible. You 2 days, 3 days and then your discipline breaks. speaker-1: Self-realization is the most important. there self-love, of self-realization. People treat as going getting ready, or going play time, or going time, this is not self-love. Self-love is discipline. When you are disciplined, you know How to plan your things? You know my body needs what? First thing in this world, what is this? Subtle body. This body. If I cannot and this body has emotional, mental, all well-being. Physical well-being is there. So for physical well-being, we need to have one physical activity daily. Again for the physical well-being, We need to really take care of what kind of food we are taking inside us. If you will eat heavy, you will feel disturbed while sleeping at night. You will eat late, your body will backfire. speaker-0: But there are so many people who don't even care about that. They that they are not allowed I mean I you shouldn't or cucumber and people are speaker-1: Because This self control speaker-0: Yes, so self control, self love comes or self love comes first and then comes self control? speaker-1: Love will and then only you will Because you should that you body fit. I you frankly example. If day I a horse. I mean I eat junk from See you are living in this world you can't avoid. You can't be completely this. Though I prefer 100 % things I should cook at home. Even if junk I at Right? But again next day I try to balance my body. I feel that there is some disturbance. Let me just... balance my body, go on a water or a fruit kind of a day, go on a khichdi diet, go on something wherein you can balance your body. But I a realisation because I love my body. I don't want to go and just be in the hospital and spend my whole money in the medicines. This is self-realisation that I am earning I would prefer to choose it, ⁓ choose to experience through different mediums to travel to my other things but Why to spend it in medicine? speaker-0: What you saying is that technically if people have mindfulness, then it's a Herculean task that I all these things into my daily routine. Now they are already burnt out, they a normal stress. How do they cope from that and get that thing into discipline? speaker-1: First you need to really understand that stress and burnout are two different things. So stress is when we know that we tired, that our brain is and nothing happens And then you think and you feel that was a this was also task. So number one thing for mindfulness what I always tell people is stop doing mighty tasking. Which is being taught to us when we were tiny. Which is being expected by every boss in the organization. Which an entrepreneur will always do. Right? Because money is But multitasking... Let simple activity. When you say ABCD, you till Z. Easy? 1, 2, 3, 100. Easy. Now A1, B2. Do it. speaker-0: A1, B2, C3, D4, E5, F6... Now it will speaker-1: So, your brain is two tangents. speaker-0: trained for that. speaker-1: No how much train, somewhere you will start thinking towards it. NLP people do training. But you use your active brain to think at that moment to club it. That's the technique. Eventually you are stressing your brain to do that. Is your brain ideally made to do two things together? No, it will go into fight and flight mode. speaker-0: Exactly. Exactly. speaker-1: He will say that I more active. It will start coming on my body part. Someone's leg will someone's hand will start someone will smoke, someone will Because multitasking is actually not meant to be speaker-0: But when people actually get inspired from... There are like very few individuals who can actually do that. But they also inspired that they want So, in that case, it's like a burnout. Burnout. I mean, ⁓ speaker-1: Body will give up. burnout, my brain is burnout, my body will it will Physical symptoms will Pains will Disease body will That is like burnout. My body has given up because I have not heard. I did when my body me the signs. It says listen to your body. I did hear. You yoga, asana, gym, instructor will say listen to your body. Your body will start giving you signs that you want stretch more or don't more weight. So listen to your body. When we don't do that due to the external situations we still keep on working or we still keep on exerting. After ⁓ office today, we have work. Friends have we will So, if you are till 8 pm, your friends will that will You the capacity to till 2 pm. Or you can take alcohol speaker-0: I was on too. Alcohol Shudder. it doesn't. It doesn't. If you overtake, then the feeling feeling in the head, speaker-1: Because body... You are saying that... Your body was not ready for that. Your body... When you backfire it, it will of your body. Or a headache. There is a different reason It's very big topic behind that. it actually hits here. Your satsnaam. it... That is a very alcohol... It's a very big term to talk about. speaker-0: The point is that are not even getting into those discussions. The point is that people find ways to relax their bodies. But not the right way. It's always the wrong way. speaker-1: See because environment, so kahin na kahin aapko apna environment choose karna padta. That is what is my free will is. I have to choose my friends, I have to choose my circle, I have to, there self love and discipline comes. Okay if I say, I am a kind of a brought up person in my family wherein I belong to a Rajput family. My mother is a Kais. I was a Kayasth and in my family, eating drinking was part of And now in what field I am is completely part ways. So, drink from childhood, even during Navratras, alcohol rises a flag Ma's and we non-veg after Rashtami Puja. And my father is a Rajput. definitely, when child is young, upset and says, give me a brandy, it will So I have seen and done everything in my life. Quite early age, not gone outside. If my friends tell me today, they will say, she must have me. So they me a And they say that now she has transformed But that was my choice. I still sit with them. I take a green tea mug. I still sit with them. I take a non-alcoholic bib. speaker-0: That was your choice. I think that's a very big statement. Which is what changes you the first. speaker-1: My body started giving back. And you know what alcohol, why I said food habits, it's very important. Sleep, very important. Because first I this Sukhshari. Physical workout to keep me active. I not active, these joints respond to Right? So physical workout, food, sleep, proper rest. Now I party, I job, it is my duty I have come I not work whether it office or home. I cannot survive. That's the basic need. But I need to choose. Am I a person who is working here just to show or am I productive? Productivity means I am doing one task at a time. So I it well and move on to another one. speaker-0: I'll come to that. So, I new day tomorrow. that new day, I preparing myself from I I night and think that I I next day, but it doesn't Then I think then I think The overthinking syndrome has become an epidemic for me. I thinking every day that today I have the whole day and here I Why did I know that this phone is disturbing. I two pages in and should two more And there so many things that you actually lined up. But at end of the day, when you sit and think and then you start the same vicious cycle the then how you control And next day when you starting, then what you actually thought? speaker-1: Okay, so first all I this thought of control, this word. If I have to control myself, I don't on my body or speaker-0: But Natasha, say that the control is definitely very harsh word. But control means that you have to the major role. If you 100 meters today, then you will That should funda of control. speaker-1: Okay, so there are two things to this. Number one, I know this is happening, I can identify. Identify is a very good thing that you know that you can identify. At least we have overcome I am still very confident that I second step. Not a day, but to consistency. So consistency, very small tip is, don't do the whole don't workout. But write what happened going to sleep. ⁓ That will bell. What I done speaker-0: going out of the way but it becomes your personal diary. And that you too. speaker-1: Personal taggies always help. It always helps. Don't keep it if you don't want to keep it. Destroy it later. Or whatever you write, I always tell it to my clients also. Tume confidence nahi hai, main ghar mein kahin rakh sakta hu. Majorly people have, youngsters have, females, married women. speaker-0: The point is that we do our task also. For example, now we podcast. Even before this, when I approached I that task there the same time that I approached Natasha. Now I know what the next step after The next step is that I to questions for I research. So the next day when I open that, I sent it yesterday, now the time becomes the essence. delay I'll make in these arrangements will delay the entire shoot and then the launch will very late. Things change And we are still in the same era that I have to send So next day I work on the questions. I it to Then we followed up on couple of things. So every single task, now this was podcast but a regular way, when you do 9 to 5 job, your boss is your head, do Now I am going back to multi-rasking. Then you different stress, then a different stress, a delivery stress, you a call from saying that didn't work, it didn't work, come and see. A person gets that if he all the in and reading again, he will feel that it happens to 16-17 items in a day and then it turns out that next day only 4 or 5 items were and that 16-17 carried forward. No problem. speaker-1: You still did those five pat on your back. Appreciate yourself. Do not demean yourself. You did five out right? No problem. those five pat on your back. It is good. You know what? I realised with time, with my journey, corporate journey, everything. So I never There was one boss of mine. thought that Natasha, you so many things to When I approached her, she said, I said ma'am, I forgot. Why did Ma'am, is mixed up. Why is up? You have not written? I said no. Make it a habit of writing. It's my personal experience, Ankeesh, when I saying this. I was But to break it down, I started writing it. If I have to talk to a salesperson, I'll write, this, to talk to If I have to talk to a partner, I'll write, this partner. You have to plan a workshop. I'll write this. Then, are there Or if I sit and that Natasha, these yesterday's For that matter, before I had my rituals, I had my things to do. I knew my husband had to go, I have to plan house, my daughter is back home. So many things to do. As a female, a person, you have your hands everywhere, frankly. Correct. So you have to manage everything. have your pets, food, all that. But I to plan I am that it is best washroom. Plan It is empty speaker-0: At least... Right? ⁓ speaker-1: You sit with your thoughts. Writing will really help. Do not take it as a burden that my next 10 or 15 tasks are left. It's okay. They left But when you sit and segregate you would know I have capacity to do this. speaker-0: The remaining ones become stress in speaker-1: See, one more habit, I always tell it to my daughter, it's very small habit, happens, tick it. That tick comes as a confirmation, that tick comes as a, okay I have done. Then you plan, now these tasks that have carried forward, like you did it for the podcast, right? You've planned, you've written, this happened, this this happened, for next step, this is an unsaid planning I'm doing in my head. If I will not do, my brain will tell you that have to this. So before taking any other task, my brain knows that I have to do this. So let me first finish this. Keep a target, a goal with every task. This is, I need to call up a salesperson, my ETA or my TAT is this. My TAT for a workshop is this. My last day to plan my content is this. To talk to this person. Give a tat, a tat which is achievable, measurable. Like we do with SWOT analysis and all these things, right? speaker-0: So, TAD, achievable and measurable, was a big stress in the office at speaker-1: But if you bring an entrepreneur in you will work triple. That's a guarantee. Because we ourselves, we with more heart. And we more heart, it not pressure for So art is something, I have done my graduation, masters, in arts and then did my astrology, lot of things. So you will say that you multitasking, you are 50 fields. Yes. But when I am with you, I am with you. When I am doing a client who needs healing, I am just doing that. Keeping all the clutter back. speaker-0: The right way is that the clutter is actually on So you to think about it. Many times with everything is the book, on the notepad. But still at certain point of time, you think that this left. This was to be And now you a to-do list. Where I the book? It the office today. So I wrote So again I messing things up if you see. So choose. speaker-1: Use your fingers to do that in a way to instead typing write it. That really rewires. speaker-0: No, but I am saying that where I where the regular to-do list is it not now. Now it on another page or another phone. So am again stressing myself that I forget this because I remembered it Why didn't remember speaker-1: You haven't reviewed the task list, It's not only about writing. You have to review your journal, have to review your task list. Today, I've out a piece of and aside. Okay, I slept in and woke Next day, I'll have review it. How will I proceed and learn? speaker-0: And which is where the reason is that remaining tasks, the remaining 10, are left. speaker-1: Reviewing is important. Now I am myself a task today. Let me chant. I am not giving a bigger task. Let's I have started a new mantra to chant. And that's a new mantra. I don't remember it. So now I the book, see it, I chant it and I am not giving that I it 108 times. I am just telling myself that I 11 times. When I remember bit, I 21. 21, I will After that, 108. Go slow. Kaizen. Kaizen really helps. It's like a practical thing which... Japanese follow and I have embodied it. speaker-0: I know about that. think the easiest layman terms are first car on gear, then go to 4th when you the speed. So one thing, I mean it's more of something that came to my mind and I'm thinking about it. When you go and teach a lot of these people, that has numerous times hit me hard. speaker-1: Everyday once. speaker-0: It's really hard for me to actually come up with a solution. I'm asking that solution. Everyone has their own timelines. They are that. When have they achieve. But some people feel empty They are doing almost everything. Some people not still they are feeling empty. Why this psychological barrier exist in our mind? speaker-1: I would say psychological is one part of it. Spiritually, you Sanchit Karma, or Nirunanubandh, that you will feel empty. The word you said, some people will do everything in life, still they feel empty. I am answering that right now. Why happen? Because their emptiness will only be when they someone else. speaker-0: Give back to the society. speaker-1: So, you your housemate, or car, or your driver. speaker-0: He will it. He not feel it. But you were that you your own will. I speaker-1: but that person is working for you. He'll give it back as an energy exchange. Create for speaker-0: This is the only thing... Hi, of course. Jack? speaker-1: In Gurdwara, have seen how much people serve. Very simple example and the best. Meaning richest person will go and the shoes in and it and then inside. Why it There is reason. Because the other person is their Guru for The other person is a pure soul. Even if and abuses them, he will say Atma Namaste. That soul is very important for whoever it their Ishta it and kept it He thanked them. Gratitude. So this was your second answer to How you when you have to give it back to the society? Only will you fulfil Why? Because you will feel that you of speaker-0: This is also self-realization from because society is to that give the guard, it your mate, he you, his house will run. speaker-1: tell that they are there for you, you are paying them. Energy exchange is all the time. But when you do it for somebody else whom you do not know, about whom you do anything, if you do something, you will feel And while that, you yourself and your life also. The person on in the temple, if you and him homemade food, you will not feel that he how he so he is getting it, he the tree But you the same food in the dining table and the salt is in you mistake. speaker-0: it speaker-1: You are the The person who is the person who is his stomach. So when this realization will happen, only you will to the stage of your life. So you cannot push As you said, that emptiness. So this those viewers who feel some emptiness in Very simple rule. Whatever you earn, give 10 % to the society. speaker-0: No, I don't mean to that... He Makk Tej as speaker-1: How that 10 percent? That's a choice. You want to give it for children, for widow, for food, for medicines. It's a choice. Whatever you want to do. if you 1000 rupees, you 10 rupees speaker-0: There also viewers who give their analysis speaker-1: But if you ⁓ social media speaker-0: I am criticizing. think again it's more of a social experiment that they do that they really wanted to tell you that I wanted to tell you that there many poor people like can help. I am doing it and I this video so that I can tell you that you also help I think that's where I am able to relate to the thought that when you are actually giving back to the society, you giving it to someone. From you exchanging Then only you feeling full, not empty. speaker-1: Yes, and the part of people who think that keep keep keep it, greed is not ending. The thing that we initially talked about, goal, one been second has been third has now they level so that is journey. They have decided, let them move that way. No how much we about There is this factor of greed which needs to be settled that can only be settled when you achieve or... ...there a shock in where you feel that... ...I have to slow down. speaker-0: Yes, it me. I know. We were social media. We scroll through at There many videos that our knowledge. I think there are 10 The are useless. But we are affecting ourselves in one way or the other. So, if I am talking about our mental well-being, self-worth, ability to stay present, how can social media actually help? speaker-1: Helps? That's a good question because I don't see it helping much in a way. yeah, whenever you're picking it up, read good content. Don't divert yourself. ⁓ like you used it, use it to develop connection, use it only for work. Frankly, in my case, I am not a social media hardcore person. My team does it. But whenever I scroll it, I only use it for work. Till today in my house I do not know how a TV remote operates. You'll call me illiterate. But I TV remote. I an AC remote by a button. I to operate Because I choose not to engage myself into that. And social media I choose only for work purposes. To reach out to people for cause. For a meaning. That's it. speaker-0: But I second your thought on remote chalana nahi aata. Kyuki I am assuming jab aap ye baat bol rahe ho to aapke paas yaat ho koi wo bada Sony aur Samsung ka TV hoga, jiska bahot de-cluster remote hota hai, jisme bahot saare button hota hai, ye nahi pata hota. Kyuki again, AC ka remote is easy, kyuki usme hme pata on-off karna hai. ⁓ Prime ka bhi remote easy hai, kyuki sif doi button hota hai. Lekin jab dher saare button hota hai, toh mujhe bhi lagta hai ye itne button kar kya rahe I can totally get your point that running that... No, The point is that you are not wasting your energy in defining that goal. You are that if it necessary then why I even think speaker-1: I never I ⁓ am going to say a statement, you may call me mean and very rude and straightforward. But the one big at has wisdom. speaker-0: I thought you angry. speaker-1: became rude because there will there will be TV. So where there a big screen, there will be no understanding. speaker-0: That happens. I don't have to judge. No, no, no. You're very right. I mean again I would relate to this. the TV I is 55 inches, not very big. Sorry. I kept a bookshelf So that people can And there, not just, so my daughter is very fond of reading books. And she has devoted her own time that she night. And I just angry that when I about you are reading the book on. But again, those books, speaker-1: Nazar toh jaaye. speaker-0: and the chemistry between that the TV never speaker-1: So beautiful. speaker-0: Reason being that doesn't because we any set up box with And running is also Herculean task. know, finding that remote, everybody is scared about it. it is easy Then they choose, let's pick up a And when we sitting all together, then they can read book and we can still chat. Something that we do. But it's not again something in a very disciplined way. Because we live together, we two daughters. And we know what we talk about, but they their own style. There little time when we all different and phone. And that is where I see a lot of... There of wastage. speaker-1: I love it. is important to spend family time together. The way you said your daughter still reads. On contrary, my daughter do not read a lot. She is not a reader-reader kind of a person. But initially you said comics though. So we give her comics. She enjoys reading comics. Then she paints. Not necessarily reading. From reading what I mean is away from digital content. Because digital content is taking you somewhere else. speaker-0: But it is fake. It's not a real world. So the imaginations that there are absurd and good and you don't have to get a choice. not a Exactly. speaker-1: lot of competition lot of comparison lot of it develops lot of lower emotions in your body. People get competition develops and it's not healthy. is something that there also. his real life? Nobody knows. He tea and sat at but he put a picture so people are jealous. He is there, there, there or where else have you speaker-0: It happens a lot. office and photo came. I in the office till when did Then I found out that it out to the cafeteria. speaker-1: It creates, because visual element works faster. So it creates lot of lower emotions in our body wherein our body starts getting into stress. fight and flight. Okay, he is going through that, he has this too. A self comparison starts So even there no pick up a hobby, pick up an activity. You like to cook, cook, you like to paint, paint, you like to dance, you like to sing. Like my daughter is a singer, she sings. I do not push it. Reading nahi pasand toh utni rakho, jitni your, kyunki thodi toh aap padhai karo ki toh reading chahiye hi. But indulge yourself into other activities wherein you do not need a device, device per se. Because that really hampers your body. speaker-0: You talked about the emotional angle to it. There is an emotional suppression theory as well. We are to strong. That's what the society has always taught about us. There many emotions that are suppressed and they never come out. speaker-1: Thanks for taking this up. Really, I am very grateful because I have seen this and felt this very closely. So I recently lost my mother in January. speaker-0: Sorry to hear that. speaker-1: We knew it, she had vascular dementia and then the word dementia came and multiple brain strokes and all. ⁓ But I had to be strong, am the eldest. Like you said, you have to be strong. The society expects you to do that. I did it. But kaptaak. Then everybody has a breakdown. When you do, when you are stronger than as it is expected. Everybody does it. Because you are expected to do, even if you want to that responsibility unsaid. But when you have your breakdowns, do not run away from that. Sit with that. Sit with that to accept it. Let your brain, your emotions, your physical body, these are different bodies we have. Astral, physical, emotional, mental. Let... everybody know and sit with that emotion. When we think that there lot of burden, lot of unsaid responsibilities, lot of things, you cannot get rid of it. But you can de-layer it one by one. Wo kab hoga? When you sit with it. When you identify ki issue kya hai. For that you need to approach a counsellor, please go. You need to talk to a family member, do that. You need to talk to a friend. speaker-0: Yes. speaker-1: do that, you need to pick up a book and write everything. Don't want to talk to anybody, do that. You want to learn new thing in life, do that. Why? Because these are different layers which are unfolding at that particular time without making you realise. ⁓ koi bhi cheez mein jab hum we are too much into it, we are too strong for that, right. And it is when you said burnout, humara burnout to ho gayi na, uske baad ja when we are expected to be too strong in society. And uske baad when we sit with our thoughts, samaji nahi aayega that what is to be done, then go layer by speaker-0: You said that to resolve this, what if people are not resolving? Do you think they over thinking about and then they are again getting stressful and then the over thinking... speaker-1: ⁓ Because they are not realizing that they are not giving time to, they are not sitting with their emotions. Sitting with the emotion is really important. ⁓ It's a betrayal for example. Usually couples are there, betrayal cases are there. You are moving on to another person to find a shoulder. speaker-0: This is first thought that to ⁓ speaker-1: You need because your emotional body, physical body is expecting a replacement of that previous person. Correct. Okay. So, ke ekdum baat, immediately you will see people have affairs. Akshar hota hai. Aur aaj ke date mei situationship ke zamani mein toh bahut akshar. speaker-0: Yes, this situation ship is also generated speaker-1: Even his has Alpha. So usually what happens is that one replacement your body, emotional body, physical, mental body needs a second replacement to compliment. But instead moving if we sit with ourselves and see where problem happened, why it didn't work out. We never ask What we do is You did it. I other three. We keep on blaming. So the moment we stop blaming others, that very moment, we start sitting with ourselves. When you take responsibility of your own actions. speaker-0: No three fingers that are looking at you. Whenever I tell people that if you are blaming someone then you actually blaming thrice to yourself. you are not looking at it. There is so much of stress in form of betrayal. Other than betrayals, there many situations in that you emotionally. You can't tell You think that if you anyone then you don't what happen. speaker-1: I speaker-0: Exactly. ⁓ speaker-1: What is point speaker-0: Now, that is within you, And it is keeping you so-called delusion that, okay, be strong, fine. speaker-1: Our brain has a tendency to create its own stories. Our brain is very creative, scientifically proven. So it has a fight and fright mode. Before going into it tells us that this is possible. So get ready to If I throw this, you will as soon I throw it, I catch it. Your brain must you a thought. speaker-0: Hmm. Correct. speaker-1: So our brain is so smart, I the ball, do this. Either you this or you catch. Your brain, our brain is like super brain when it is said that it has not even explored one person, it is not. So our brain has so much capacity, we make a story In a way it is good, but when it comes to over thinking, that is how it starts happening. Usually, speaker-0: So... speaker-1: husband wife, your boss colleague or office structures, you competing for the same thing or in the same position then you start getting insecure about it. Why? Why these insecurities come? speaker-0: Every action gets a different reaction. speaker-1: What is Or maybe your help. Why he a lead for Why is he helping me for converting this lead? Why? It some benefit. Maybe he engage me here and go another trip We start thinking extra because we are not in the present moment. The only mistake we do is that we do not enjoy the present which is given as a gift to us. speaker-0: and which is why we are lonely in the crowd. speaker-1: Yes, which is why because we live the same format So we don't speaker-0: and office is you a set group, you on a trip with you after office rings, then you home and you feel like you alone. speaker-1: Because I all my time there. Now, the who I to my they are expecting my time. There is expectation there too. Everywhere there is expectation. But because we balance. The key why we all take birth in this is balance. We... Everything needs balance. My dad taught me one thing in life. That if... Balance is not there then you will just keep on running. say that Shakti is there. Masculine, feminine, yin-yan, it teaches If we outside time then are we our time at home too? We are alone at the party outside and we are alone too. Because the got distant or a fight or there no then they didn't understand or wife is her work, husband is in his work, children are alone in room watching, they watching, they are or their mates. I see so many examples, kids are being brought up by helps. speaker-0: Let's not even get into it because that's bigger topic. speaker-1: The thing is balance is the key and loneliness comes only when we to overcome speaker-0: In fact, you two classic examples. You talked about your mom. Then the second one is about those breakups. Here, we say that we a support system. No what. If there is then somebody will that I want to talk about Maybe one person will think that what will You will think that I understand your emotions and similarly goes with other examples as well. What is the biggest emotional mistake people do in relationship that they actually damage their mental health around? speaker-1: expectations. which speaker-0: And 2. Why do they do that? speaker-1: over expectations because that is a self-reflection actually. If I expect you to, ⁓ okay let's say, aap kisi problem se koi situation aise hoti that I would have reached early or on time but Ankesh is not there, okay. Because I am a disciplined person, I will think, yaar ye kya baat hai unprofessionalism hai. Right? Mujhe kya lagta? Expected? speaker-0: Hmm. speaker-1: ...that you will be here on time. Just say, expected that I should be here on time. Right? Because we have things to do ahead. Expectation is a reflection. If I the person in a relationship or in office... ...that you this task before So that is my set of thought, my set of expression... ...that I do Turn around time. But he is that this is turnaround time, I will So our expectation is our reflection. Basically the same thing pointing out fingers. When we point out, we see only the person that we are speaker-0: But tell me thing, if you told to the TAT before time. So as a boss, aren't you looking at a successor who exactly matches your energy? speaker-1: Yeah, but because I am a boss, I have already seen that that person has a stare to walk on. So, I need to be a person ideally rather than expecting being a coach. I not helping that person. I am not a coach. I am not being grateful. When we are grateful, we overcome all these hassles. So, when we write in the morning, or at the night we write about the whole day, every morning pick up four affirmations or five affirmations, which you and write for what all things you are grateful for. night, write write Like morning I do write my affirmations and I write that I am grateful to my family, to my friends, to my helps, to my team, to my pets, to the food I eat, to my cook. Everybody. So my morning first thought is compassion. Similarly to that boss and a colleague or boss and a subordinate. If I a mistake, I expect I his position. Give me that salary. speaker-0: There is always two sides of the coin. Which one is you thinking? speaker-1: So, either you want to be a leader or you want to be a coach. speaker-0: So in this case if you are emphasizing more on ki tujhe mere jaisa banna hai, you are not still coaching him, you are actually emphasizing tujhe mere jaisa banna hai, tujhe aisa karna Karna padaya hai. Toh aap leader abhi bhi ban raha ho, but you not helping him become you. speaker-1: is still a positive term I'll say either being a boss or being a leader. Leader always take the team along, boss is always bossy. Do this and we will this if you approach So have that compassion kindness for others to understand their situation. you there and you were there, then what thought process is through. Means you late and there have issue, you would have told me. Rather I would and blasted speaker-0: And still, mean, there's always different stories across. speaker-1: Yes, correct. I talking the surprise element. Let's say, the office. Husband wife are in relationship. Wife is waiting. Husband has to late at night. office, something happened. And today, it's very late. So, than blasting, she can actually ask if everything okay. Is everything okay or not? The person said that someone accident on I was helping them. Maybe it's okay. But... at least give a chance to another person. speaker-0: I'll probably pick up have an art therapy angle too. So, now considering that a lot of emotions are suppressed inside, they are out, how to speaker-1: I saved this one to say at Okay, when you say there many people, your question has an answer. There many people who want express Who they to? Where should go and If a counsellor, doctor or friend, they will judge We always choose a third person either. Or a technique, like I said creativity or something wherein we express. without using a tongue, means without using our words. Art therapy is one of it. It can be sound therapy, can be dance therapy, can be music therapy where we sing and express. do not... See, these are ⁓ tools of mindfulness. Like you said, being mindful is a very difficult task. It cannot But if you like singing, why don't you take out 30 minutes and sing? Okay. Similarly, art therapy is a tool or a technique wherein we actually ⁓ go through that specific emotion. heal it, express it and find out answers on its own during the process. You do not need me for that. I will be the anchor to take you through the process. That is a process. speaker-0: So you can draw, you can paint, you can sing, you can garden, you can cook. speaker-1: You can cook. You can spend time with pets. They are the best healers. speaker-0: Yeah, mean, that's a different debate that's at my home. But the beauty of it is that there's always a way that you can actually control your mind. You really have to strategize those things and developing that is not a stretch. speaker-1: Guys are again a very technical cooperative. But if we try like Lalita Maa, Lalita Sastanaam says she is playful. Just be playful. You have seen whenever we met, see in Just live the life speaker-0: I will be there in a while. Chill. speaker-1: But she was never regretting that it was her choice. She knew it was her choice. So just be a geet, just be playful like Lalita Maa. She is like playful. You do not know what is coming next. But at least she knows that she can Why not live speaker-0: So, what you were why did I word strategy? So, I wanted to know the corporate reality around it. speaker-1: So in corporate when we say it is difficult to manage, of course I have lived that life. I was lucky to work with a Japanese company who used to talk about it and it was pretty easy for me because ⁓ Japanese are very compassionate people to work with. If you have any issue in your life, the other ones will say address it first. speaker-0: ⁓ well, I can understand. Hmm. speaker-1: The rule should that if you happy at you will too. Unless you are just running for money, then you and me are talking... It does not matter, right? If it is just about numbers and goals and just money, numbers also because... Then this is not a point. Because it a stage yet. Who are we to talk about it? Everyone has their own stage. So we are no one to bring about... speaker-0: Exactly. speaker-1: that context that the stage will and we talk. No. But yeah, if you really want to end the corporate life, pick up a spot for yourself. Do any activity, maybe go back and once a week if you feel like, enjoy cooking, do that. Many men does it. Pick up any activity like, of course, if you know, if you like dancing, you can. If you, I mean, people feel like, if you want not only with the office people, also your family. See the balance. There are a many things attached to this. Being mindful, I have spoken about multiple tools. If you think that it is extremely stressful and you are at a burnout level, take an external help. Always take a help. speaker-0: Don't be shy. Do you recommend that it should be a 10 minute thing that people can do if they spare 10 minutes out in the entire day just to be my example? speaker-1: It's enough. Just one cycle of breath. Okay, like we are talking. Just focus and see how your breath is working. And how are you breathing? Put one hand on your tummy. Take a deep breath. Now realise is your tummy going in or back? If it is going in, you breathing wrong. speaker-0: as in? speaker-1: So when you breathe in, what is happening? speaker-0: When I breathing in, tummy goes speaker-1: Ideally, you come out. That is biggest mistake we do. We do not breathe in our ideal scenario. Because we fast life habit. speaker-0: So when we breathe, so... speaker-1: Take breath, up-conscious breath. chest swell? Your should too, The goes inside and not breathe out. speaker-0: Cheers, fuller. So this relaxed, this going inside. We don't think. speaker-1: Now you see, you one cycle of breath, you some rest. speaker-0: So this is something an exercise. do this a lot sleep. Relaxing, breathing. when I I am sleepy, I think counting till 10 or 15. But... Yes, I used speaker-1: An exercise in a very speaker-0: That is sheep counting and all that. Recently that is something I have started in couple of years. In 2024, lost that, I was not clueless So, stress level also developing. That how podcast will Or I something else. Now, when they sit and you are alone with your thoughts. Then it is becoming claustrophobic. It feels like I compressing. At that time, you de-clutter it. You to out of You need to get some air. I generally started practicing this. I down, straightened and started just breathing. If my gets oxygen, then maybe I will speaker-1: So I will give you few tools which our viewers can also do it. One cycle of breath, yes, if you meditation. You 10 minutes, do it. Even that is not possible, one cycle of breath, you that nothing happening with me. Pick up a yoga nidra on YouTube. Listen to that, maybe 5 minutes, 10 minutes. Yoga nidra, actually during the day you when you too burnt out. and all the officers have one pace to relax. can just sit and do a yoga nidra also that is also fine that will relax your body to charge. It's quick to charge. Japanese to badme karin. It's from the... ⁓ speaker-0: It is It day after It was the day yesterday It and after 10-30 minutes I was like, oh, I so After I active. I what all things finish that day. speaker-1: Yes, it will charge you for next 3 to 4 hours. Yes. can Meditate can't this. Read You can't this. on your breath. Breath is the biggest anchor which is in our control. You can't either. There soul-fego frequencies. Just put it on in one corner of your room. Put it on. Light a very nice scented candle. Create an environment to sleep. No lights. just lie down in some time only while listening to the frequency because that has alpha waves. True. You start getting into the… speaker-0: But if you are restricting and 10 more things in mind... Device? Not even device, overthinking. speaker-1: But not Over thinking, you just lie down straight, create an environment. thinking cannot stopped. Sorry to say that. stops at end, it cannot be But these tools really help to sleep. These very small. People have made companies out of it like sleep. There are many companies to make sleep. speaker-0: Stop Yeah. speaker-1: There are multiple different tools, reverse counting is one of it that gets you into the hypnosis again in a state, slowly slowly, brain relax. Basically you need to put your brain on a calm and relaxing thought process. That's why I said that journaling is very important because when you write things, you the clutter on the paper. Then if you late, you will be little relaxed only. Still there are times you cannot sleep. Pick up any one small mantra or if you have it. in a habit of doing Hanuman, Chalisa or anything. Basically these things, one it creates sound impact in your brain and when we chant, loud chanting at time. Chant, mummering or in which is called moan. Chanting is multiple types and every chanting has a different impact. speaker-0: Yes, I like chanting. Exactly. speaker-1: But when we it is keeping you calm from inside and your brain is focused on numbers and chanting. So you are doing the right Uchcharan in your mind. That is the powerful chanting when we do it in speaker-0: I think we will have an exclusive interview because I think that would work the best. considering that... In fact, Natasha, a tropic. Even we 6 hours and talk, that is also work. But considering the time frame, one last question that I wanted to ask you. If somebody is feeling very overwhelmed today and stuck, emotionally exhausted, what... One piece of advice would you give it to them? Start doing this and gradually you'll overcome everything. speaker-1: If they can write, it's perfect. Write it and burn it. Burn it. When I say burn it, you are telling your body, mind and soul. Burning trains your brain in a way that it is going out of your system. So fire element in your body also is activated and it has capacity to overcome that desire or that speaker-0: a movie too. agreed. ⁓ speaker-1: When we become our emotions become unstable. That means the fire in has very low. It has So to activate we external elements or physical workout. Or we to some small tools. Write it, burn it. Number one, you're telling your brain it's out of my system. my thoughts. It's Whether it's a problem boyfriend or girlfriend, relationship, finances, anything. Finances hai, toh would say write it on a bay leaf. There are different things to different things. Burning is one another thing. speaker-0: Bailey if I know people used to burn it on the stove. speaker-1: Yes. So, ⁓ one is that, another is to not run away from the situation. speaker-0: Face it. speaker-1: facing your fears will actually give you ideas to handle it. speaker-0: and the strength as well. speaker-1: Our biggest mistake is that run away. We run So if we run away and that situation like a warrior spirit, then it is really going to help. speaker-0: Is it like situation you have generated, so you speaker-1: Say it like that but you to If you someone will win. Either the It's not happening. It's overwhelming situation. Then take external help. We don't the strength When people go into depression. When the fire inside has extinguished. The strength, the capacity, the power, everything is over. Scientifically, psychologically, would suggest go take help wherein you can talk and understand a third perspective. A perspective which is not coming from your family, not coming from a friend, not coming from a colleague. Because they know So my brain knows. it's judgmental that he's saying But when you go to a specialist or a counselor or a psychologist, never be shy of going to them. speaker-0: Hmm. speaker-1: They are just listener. And when people come to me also as Tarot consultant or astrologer, I always think that I am looking their situation from a third person perspective. My brain is open. I solution. For example, you don't know me. And if I say, Ankesh, I had this situation. You will see from a helicopter view. You will have capacity to give answer. Because my brain is stuck in that situation, it a vicious circle. It is not going to give me an answer. That is why always suggest, go seek help. speaker-0: That's like extreme stage. When becoming stuck, your mind is not working speaker-1: Absolutely, when the fire is No, we have spoken about multiple things to do. Pick up anything for yourself, right, burn, that is very very important because we generate that. ⁓ You may think what the practical session, but ⁓ doing ⁓ or sitting with the moon. speaker-0: with the moon. speaker-1: full moon circles or sit under the moon because yes, you may answer that on your own also. Our body is 80 percent water, 75 percent water. And when moon has a capacity to disturb and get the high tides in the ocean, why not a human? You will see a lot of these disturbances, all these emotional traumas, all these issues closer to full moon. speaker-0: a very calming zone. That's exactly how it works with the body as well. The tides in ocean, that's moon emotionally elements. Bang on. Yeah, beautiful. ⁓ So, before we wind this up, this quick rapid fire round. ⁓ One word that defines a healthy mind. Be mindful. Morning routine or evening routine? speaker-1: with yourself, be mindful. morning. speaker-0: Art therapy or meditation? speaker-1: meditation because our therapy is a tool. speaker-0: That's a tool, a habit everyone should start today. speaker-1: start small. speaker-0: that small. One thing people should stop worrying about. speaker-1: Everything, everything, just surrender. speaker-0: A book that changed your perspective on life. speaker-1: Power of Now by Cartola. speaker-0: gratitude or ambition. speaker-1: gratitude anytime. speaker-0: We have talked this. What does success mean to you? speaker-1: I'm successful when I go and help someone else. When my soul is valuable on this earth. Like, I should fulfill my purpose. speaker-0: One message for people silently struggling. speaker-1: Self-love is really important. So unless you value yourself, no one else in this world is going to value you. speaker-0: Life becomes easier when we speaker-1: When we live it, when we have fun, when we enjoy, when we are playful. speaker-0: ⁓ One message for people silently struggling, I completely second you on that, echo that voice because when you go through a betrayal, you go through a certain emotional imbalance, at time when you a relaxed mode and think that I don't anyone, I ⁓ will it I think that's where you bring yourself out to the world. And till you think that I want someone, ⁓ speaker-1: win-win situation. speaker-0: And I... You are actually helpless. You can't do anything. speaker-1: then we are again expecting the cycle of expectation is just rolling out. Self-love is I am whole, I am complete, I am independent and I am balanced. speaker-0: So Natasha, thank you for joining me. As again, session again, I will you 6 hours, so I the questions won't And we spend so much time that every moment becomes a classic example for that how to absorb it, positive or negative. So I really like to thank Natasha for taking time out today and talking about such a deep meaning topic which almost energizes me every time. Whenever I Natasha or other coaches, it different mindset. Because when they share such thoughtful insights on a topic like this, that affects everyone of us, regardless of our profession, age or stage of life. What different was that throughout this conversation is the reminder that well-being isn't something we achieve once and then move on from there. It's a practice. It is something that built through awareness, small daily choices. You choose to be a good person or you choose to be a bad person but that's again your choices. It goes down to meaningful relationships, giving ourselves permission to pause when life feels overwhelming. We often spend years learning how to careers, businesses and professional success but very little time learning how to take care of our minds and emotions. Conversations like these help us bridge that gap. So to everyone listening and watching, I hope this episode encourages you to check in with yourself, whether you're a bit a little kinder to yourself or it's a remembrance that seeking balance is not a sign of weakness. It's one of the most important investments you can make in your life. So if you're enjoying this conversation, do share it with someone who might benefit from it. You never know whose day is complete perspective gets changed or the journey. It might be impossible for them to impact or create an impact, but do share with them. And thank you for tuning into the Collaborative Canvas podcast. Until next time, stay curious, stay collaborative, and keep building what's next. Thank you, Natasha. speaker-1: Thank you so much. Thank you so much. ⁓