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MONEY DIARIES: A Single Mum On Welfare With A Foot In Each World · She's On The Money

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Just before we get started, we'd like to acknowledge and
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: pay respect to Australia's Aboriginal and torrest Rate islander people's.
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  Speaker 1: the skies all across Australia. We thank you for sharing
• 0:14
  Speaker 1: and for caring for the land on which we are
• 0:16
  Speaker 1: able to learn. We pay respects to elders past and present,
• 0:19
  Speaker 1: and we share our friendship and our kindness.
• 0:22
  Speaker 2: She's on the Money, She's on the Money.
• 0:45
  Speaker 3: Hello, and welcome to She's on the Money, the podcast
• 0:48
  Speaker 3: for millennials who want financial freedom. Welcome back to another
• 0:52
  Speaker 3: shot back Money Diary. Monday one of my favorite days
• 0:54
  Speaker 3: of the week because we get to chat to a
• 0:56
  Speaker 3: gorgeous community member to learn about them, their story, their money,
• 0:59
  Speaker 3: and all of the deats in between.
• 1:01
  Speaker 1: Is Monday really your favorite day of the week. Yes, it's.
• 1:03
  Speaker 3: I mean, look, Monday's It was just a nice thing
• 1:05
  Speaker 3: to say for the worst, but it's one of my
• 1:07
  Speaker 3: favorite Cheese on the Money episodes.
• 1:08
  Speaker 1: Okay, that's fair.
• 1:10
  Speaker 3: Now, before we get into today's episode, I did just
• 1:12
  Speaker 3: want to put a little trigger warning on there. We're
• 1:14
  Speaker 3: going to be talking about some difficult things today, including
• 1:17
  Speaker 3: domestic violence. So if you're in a place where hearing
• 1:20
  Speaker 3: about that makes you a little bit uncomfy, give this
• 1:22
  Speaker 3: episode a skip. There's a whole backlog of other episodes
• 1:25
  Speaker 3: that you can listen to, and we'll see you on
• 1:27
  Speaker 3: Wednesday instead. All right, Jess, Well, let's hear about this
• 1:30
  Speaker 3: week's diarist already, our direct says, I'm a single mum
• 1:33
  Speaker 3: who lives on welfare. Three years ago, I was sitting
• 1:35
  Speaker 3: across the table from a mortgage broker with thirty K,
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  Speaker 3: ready to buy an investment property. But little did I
• 1:40
  Speaker 3: know that there was Bob President at this meeting, who
• 1:42
  Speaker 3: I was clueless about. Within nine months, I was a
• 1:44
  Speaker 3: parent and thirty K poorer. I had lost the lot, jobless,
• 1:48
  Speaker 3: and stuck inside. Thanks to COVID, I turned to welfare
• 1:50
  Speaker 3: to support myself and my daughter. After four long years
• 1:53
  Speaker 3: in a domestic violence relationship. In twenty twenty two, I
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  Speaker 3: was able to walk away with eighteen K, pay off
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  Speaker 3: my debts, and be financial free for a while while
• 2:01
  Speaker 3: I battled for custody of my daughter. I am grateful
• 2:03
  Speaker 3: that I can rely on welfare for the next few
• 2:05
  Speaker 3: years to keep us afloat.
• 2:06
  Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, what a story money Jost. Welcome to
• 2:09
  Speaker 1: the show. Let's get straight into it. I would love
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  Speaker 1: to know. Tell us a little bit about your money story.
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  Speaker 4: Okay, So my money story is a bit like all
• 2:18
  Speaker 4: over the place. So growing up, like I come from money,
• 2:26
  Speaker 4: if that makes sense. Yeah, like my family they're a
• 2:29
  Speaker 4: bit by that breach. So my mom is the first
• 2:31
  Speaker 4: person in her family to break generational poverty. Very cool again,
• 2:38
  Speaker 4: and so was my dad but through marriage.
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  Speaker 3: Yeah.
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  Speaker 4: Yeah. So then my sister and I we were raised
• 2:46
  Speaker 4: to have everything we wanted. Basically, we could have five
• 2:50
  Speaker 4: Barbie dolls and everything we wanted to eat and go
• 2:54
  Speaker 4: over where we want. We're on fancy holidays quite often actually.
• 2:57
  Speaker 4: But then when I had my daughter, I was on
• 3:00
  Speaker 4: the other end of the spectrum. So we live at
• 3:02
  Speaker 4: my parents' house and I'm like on the poorer side
• 3:06
  Speaker 4: and then outside my bedroom doors on the richer side. Yeah,
• 3:11
  Speaker 4: there's a bit all over the place, I guess.
• 3:14
  Speaker 1: Kind of like you got a foot in each world.
• 3:16
  Speaker 4: Yeah. Yeah, it's it's challenging because I live on a
• 3:19
  Speaker 4: beautiful property with four egcres of land, but I can't
• 3:24
  Speaker 4: buy her lots of things.
• 3:26
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but she gets sorts of things, like my mom
• 3:28
  Speaker 1: gives her lots of things that must be really challenging
• 3:31
  Speaker 1: for you, kind of like as just said, having a
• 3:33
  Speaker 1: foot in each world in a way. But the next
• 3:36
  Speaker 1: question is what do you do for work and how
• 3:39
  Speaker 1: much money do you au? And tell us all about it.
• 3:41
  Speaker 4: Okay, so this is where it gets a little bit
• 3:43
  Speaker 4: like tricky.
• 3:44
  Speaker 1: That's all right.
• 3:45
  Speaker 4: So, like I said, I'm on welfare, like I've won
• 3:48
  Speaker 4: on an link payments. So I started my journey out
• 3:50
  Speaker 4: on a partnered income that ended I would say, maybe
• 3:56
  Speaker 4: August September last year, that income, and and then I
• 4:00
  Speaker 4: end up with a tax bill that was for his income,
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  Speaker 4: not mine. So then I had to remediate the situation
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  Speaker 4: by going on a single income because yeah, so I'm
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  Speaker 4: on a parenting pension single because I am a single parent.
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  Speaker 4: Now additional to that income, I work for a startup
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  Speaker 4: company and I worked directly for the CEO casually, so
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  Speaker 4: I have to split that with my pension because if
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  Speaker 4: I earn too much then I don't get the full pension.
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  Speaker 1: Yeah, that makes it.
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  Speaker 4: I also have eleven other streams of income.
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  Speaker 1: Eleven I didn't know that many. I didn't even know
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  Speaker 1: who are you hustle lady.
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  Speaker 4: I know. So I just started a new job last
• 4:45
  Speaker 4: week in finance, which is kind of interesting.
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  Speaker 1: Yes, queen, Yes, more women in finance. We love these
• 4:52
  Speaker 1: Well we're all women. How exciting.
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  Speaker 4: There's only one male and he's like the tech dude.
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  Speaker 1: Yeah, all right, that's fair. He can come, he can
• 5:00
  Speaker 1: come because on this is nice.
• 5:02
  Speaker 4: Yeah, so that's about twenty five thousand dollars a year.
• 5:06
  Speaker 4: And then I do like a like a side gig
• 5:09
  Speaker 4: where like I went for a Strata company where I
• 5:11
  Speaker 4: take their bins out once a week. It's very odd
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  Speaker 4: that pays about two thousand dollars a year.
• 5:18
  Speaker 1: Hey, that's kind of cool. I didn't even know that,
• 5:20
  Speaker 1: Like that makes sense that that's a job because Strata
• 5:23
  Speaker 1: has someone doing that. Is that super easy to do?
• 5:26
  Speaker 1: Or how did you find that? Because I feel like
• 5:27
  Speaker 1: there might be some people listening who are like, oh,
• 5:29
  Speaker 1: two grand a year, i'd do that. I'll take your
• 5:31
  Speaker 1: bins out for that.
• 5:33
  Speaker 4: I went on Antaskar and I found this lady and
• 5:35
  Speaker 4: she's like, can you come every week? Like it is
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  Speaker 4: an hour from my house, but it's ten minutes from
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  Speaker 4: one of my officers at work.
• 5:42
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so I.
• 5:43
  Speaker 4: Was like, yeah, I'll come and so just take sixteen
• 5:46
  Speaker 4: bins out every week, one k down the driveway each time,
• 5:50
  Speaker 4: two in hand, Like incredible few dollars a week. That's
• 5:54
  Speaker 4: it's my petrol.
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  Speaker 3: Like I didn't work out as well because you're walking
• 5:57
  Speaker 3: up in the next every time.
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  Speaker 4: Yeah, my daughter loves to come and she'll like to
• 6:00
  Speaker 4: push the bins up there.
• 6:01
  Speaker 1: Oh my gosh. Free labor as well. We love to
• 6:04
  Speaker 1: see it, get it, get working early. I love that.
• 6:08
  Speaker 4: Yeah. So I also get child support. So that's four
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  Speaker 4: dollars nine nine cents a day.
• 6:13
  Speaker 1: Is really child Yes, perhaps.
• 6:16
  Speaker 4: At seventeen hundred one seven hundred a year, that is
• 6:19
  Speaker 4: craz No, I'd to put our daycare so it didn't
• 6:23
  Speaker 4: cover the cost of that.
• 6:24
  Speaker 3: Can I ask for a little bit of context? Do
• 6:26
  Speaker 3: you have your daughter full time?
• 6:28
  Speaker 4: I do?
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  Speaker 3: Yeah, it blows my mind. And sorry, I know we're
• 6:32
  Speaker 3: getting very off topic and we need to get that's
• 6:33
  Speaker 3: a question. But it is wild to me that as
• 6:37
  Speaker 3: a full time care who is taking on I would
• 6:39
  Speaker 3: assume all of the financial responsibility. Spoiler lit, babies aren't cheap.
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  Speaker 3: They're very expensive. That the most that you can receive
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  Speaker 3: is five bucks a day. I can't imagine that that's
• 6:50
  Speaker 3: going very far Like that is that's insane to me,
• 6:54
  Speaker 3: truly blowing my mind right now. Like I knew that
• 6:57
  Speaker 3: that was a thing, and it's one thing to understand
• 6:59
  Speaker 3: it and see it.
• 7:00
  Speaker 1: And you know, you see posts in our community of
• 7:02
  Speaker 1: people who are going through so many similar things to
• 7:05
  Speaker 1: you money dis I keep wanting to use people's names.
• 7:08
  Speaker 1: I like, I'm that person. But it just blows my
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  Speaker 1: mind that there's no way of managing that, Like there's
• 7:15
  Speaker 1: no better way of just calculating it. Like it's just
• 7:18
  Speaker 1: you know, and obviously there's some kind of equation working
• 7:21
  Speaker 1: in the background, because like, what was it, four dollars
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  Speaker 1: twenty five? Like that to me is inta oh okay,
• 7:27
  Speaker 1: sorry for dolls ninety ninety big spend to you. But
• 7:29
  Speaker 1: it just it makes no sense to me that that's
• 7:32
  Speaker 1: the calculation when we could so easily create a really
• 7:36
  Speaker 1: quick budget going all right, well, nappy's on average cost this,
• 7:39
  Speaker 1: let's you know, even just drop it down to you know,
• 7:42
  Speaker 1: the home brand nappies. All right, what does formula? What's
• 7:45
  Speaker 1: the cheapest tin of formula? All right? On average, babies
• 7:48
  Speaker 1: have like maybe two tins a week from what I understand,
• 7:50
  Speaker 1: like they don't even do that budget and then split
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  Speaker 1: it by half and go all right, well you can
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  Speaker 1: do half in your partner or ex partner can do half.
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  Speaker 1: And it's just it makes no sense to me, and
• 7:59
  Speaker 1: it breaks because there are so many women in this
• 8:01
  Speaker 1: situation and you're clearly a hustler. But then on top
• 8:05
  Speaker 1: of that, you're like, well, I had to pull my
• 8:06
  Speaker 1: kid out of daycare because it just didn't make financial sense,
• 8:09
  Speaker 1: And like, what was daycare costing you a day?
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  Speaker 4: One?
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  Speaker 1: Eight and you got four ninety nine from your partner
• 8:15
  Speaker 1: to help with that?
• 8:16
  Speaker 4: Yeah?
• 8:17
  Speaker 1: Yeah, No, basically no, sir, it's a joke.
• 8:19
  Speaker 4: It doesn't matter what I earn because it's based on
• 8:22
  Speaker 4: what he earns and the percentage of care. So I
• 8:24
  Speaker 4: have one hundred percent care to her and you only
• 8:27
  Speaker 4: started paying this six months after we separated. Yeah, so
• 8:31
  Speaker 4: he's only really paid it from like January.
• 8:34
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so basically nothing and no real support in that way.
• 8:38
  Speaker 4: Yeah, So I pulled her out. She's getting really sick
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  Speaker 4: and I just couldn't. It was like four hundred dollars
• 8:42
  Speaker 4: a month. Yeah, she went a total of I think
• 8:47
  Speaker 4: like nine days like her bookings and she went three
• 8:50
  Speaker 4: days of that because she's so sick.
• 8:52
  Speaker 1: The cool little honey.
• 8:53
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 8:54
  Speaker 1: So I'm like, we're just going to stop doing this
• 8:56
  Speaker 1: because it doesn't make sense. It doesn't make financial sense.
• 9:00
  Speaker 1: Tell me a little bit more about these other streams
• 9:02
  Speaker 1: of income that you have.
• 9:03
  Speaker 4: Okay, So I resell mostly baby things. Great, because I
• 9:08
  Speaker 4: live in a rural area, so I go to town
• 9:11
  Speaker 4: quite often. I'm on the border of Act yep. So
• 9:15
  Speaker 4: going to Act, there's always stuff on the side of
• 9:17
  Speaker 4: the road, and it's like a hobby ace, grab a friend,
• 9:19
  Speaker 4: grab my sister, and go on my big car. When
• 9:22
  Speaker 4: I had a big car and just like put stuff
• 9:24
  Speaker 4: in my car, stick in my garage and sell it.
• 9:27
  Speaker 4: And then I would use that money to pay for
• 9:29
  Speaker 4: her nappies. Yeah, I couldn't afford it, Especially before I
• 9:33
  Speaker 4: moved here, I couldn't afford it.
• 9:35
  Speaker 1: I know, saving stuff from landfill as well, which is great.
• 9:37
  Speaker 1: I feel like you're so resourceful, like single moms are
• 9:41
  Speaker 1: another bridge. Like you guys are next level. I love it.
• 9:44
  Speaker 1: Tell us about your other streams. I'm very here for this.
• 9:48
  Speaker 4: They're basically just like Survey's market research, my bin's job,
• 9:53
  Speaker 4: any air tasker jobs that come up. So I'm qualified
• 9:55
  Speaker 4: and business qualified in childcare admin do all those of things.
• 10:00
  Speaker 4: I'm not very creative, so I just do like the
• 10:02
  Speaker 4: physical labor like shovels on dirt and paid seven mill
• 10:05
  Speaker 4: of bucks. Yeah, and then I do card and bank
• 10:09
  Speaker 4: churning as well.
• 10:11
  Speaker 1: What's that?
• 10:12
  Speaker 4: So it's basically like you open a bank account, you
• 10:14
  Speaker 4: do all the things you need to do, pops some
• 10:16
  Speaker 4: money in there, use it a few times, you gain
• 10:18
  Speaker 4: the benefits of opening the card, and then you close
• 10:21
  Speaker 4: it off.
• 10:21
  Speaker 3: Oh yes, I see, So like credit cards that come
• 10:24
  Speaker 3: with like sign up bonuses and things like that.
• 10:27
  Speaker 1: Got it interesting? Do you know how much that impacts
• 10:30
  Speaker 1: your credit score? Though I'm just being financial advisor?
• 10:34
  Speaker 4: Oh really, My credit score is like in the seven
• 10:37
  Speaker 4: to eight hundred, and I don't have any other loans.
• 10:41
  Speaker 4: I've never bought a house, so it's just my phone
• 10:45
  Speaker 4: bill from like three years ago and those all.
• 10:49
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 10:49
  Speaker 1: Next money question I want to ask is what is
• 10:51
  Speaker 1: your big money goal?
• 10:53
  Speaker 4: So my initial goal was to buy a house, but
• 10:57
  Speaker 4: that so far from happening at this moment.
• 11:02
  Speaker 1: And that's okay.
• 11:03
  Speaker 4: My daughter and I have quite content who we are.
• 11:05
  Speaker 4: We're safe now and we're trying to just get on
• 11:08
  Speaker 4: with the day to day instead of what could happen
• 11:11
  Speaker 4: further down the track. So I have a car, that's
• 11:14
  Speaker 4: my first goal. My next goal as I'm getting in
• 11:17
  Speaker 4: visa line. So that's about eight thousand epic.
• 11:21
  Speaker 1: And then I want to ask you have a lot
• 11:23
  Speaker 1: of income streams, but do you have any investments.
• 11:27
  Speaker 4: I have Super, which has literally nothing in it because
• 11:31
  Speaker 4: I had to withdraw for like during COVID. I manually
• 11:36
  Speaker 4: put fifty dollars a fortnight in there to can top
• 11:39
  Speaker 4: it up, and I didn't get any top ups during
• 11:43
  Speaker 4: my matt leave or anything like that, so there's just
• 11:45
  Speaker 4: nothing for like four years.
• 11:47
  Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, how do you feel about that?
• 11:50
  Speaker 4: It's a bit sad, especially when I'm in a household
• 11:53
  Speaker 4: with family members who have like over you know, I'd
• 11:58
  Speaker 4: say one twenty my mum's got almost a million in Super,
• 12:02
  Speaker 4: So when she tells me that, I'm just like, I
• 12:05
  Speaker 4: like five thousand dollars.
• 12:06
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's so hard.
• 12:08
  Speaker 4: Yeah, So it's like everything I've worked for in the past,
• 12:12
  Speaker 4: I'd say eight years is gone.
• 12:15
  Speaker 3: Yeah, but it's hard because you have to factor into
• 12:18
  Speaker 3: that and we'll dive into this again a little bit later.
• 12:20
  Speaker 3: But you've obviously gone through a little bit of a trauma,
• 12:23
  Speaker 3: and I don't think it's a bad thing that you've
• 12:25
  Speaker 3: prioritized your personal safety over That's the best thing some
• 12:29
  Speaker 3: of those other things, because if you don't have a future,
• 12:32
  Speaker 3: there's no point having money there for it, right.
• 12:34
  Speaker 4: Yeah, especially when financial abuse is such a I had
• 12:38
  Speaker 4: such a big presence. Yeah, and I didn't really know
• 12:41
  Speaker 4: what it was until my lawyer was pointed out to me. Yeah.
• 12:44
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and that's the painful part because you probably didn't realize, right, Yeah,
• 12:49
  Speaker 1: exactly exactly. So we'll get into that straight after the break.
• 12:52
  Speaker 1: But next question is do you have any debts?
• 12:55
  Speaker 4: I do I owe eight thousand dollars to a family member.
• 13:00
  Speaker 4: They helped me get a car so that it wasn't
• 13:03
  Speaker 4: up for grabs during my custody for my child.
• 13:07
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't have still yep.
• 13:10
  Speaker 4: And I'm about to buy laptop, so it's like a
• 13:12
  Speaker 4: future did Yeah, I need one new one for work
• 13:15
  Speaker 4: because my little MacBook does not cope with all of
• 13:18
  Speaker 4: the systems I'm using.
• 13:19
  Speaker 1: For Yeah, that is fair. There are a lot of
• 13:22
  Speaker 1: them as well. Next question, when and if you are
• 13:25
  Speaker 1: shopping online? Are you using shop back?
• 13:28
  Speaker 4: I do you shop back? Like religiously?
• 13:32
  Speaker 1: Feel like I do? Actually religious? Tell us?
• 13:36
  Speaker 4: How so I buy my petrol and shot back.
• 13:39
  Speaker 1: Your petrol shop back?
• 13:41
  Speaker 4: This is you?
• 13:42
  Speaker 1: Tell us?
• 13:44
  Speaker 4: So, I haven't heard anyone else do this someats.
• 13:47
  Speaker 1: I don't believe. I thought I was across like every possible.
• 13:50
  Speaker 1: I thought you were the wizard. But I've never heard
• 13:52
  Speaker 1: of petrol. Please tell me more.
• 13:54
  Speaker 4: No, So I have a Toyota. I bought a Toyota
• 13:57
  Speaker 4: at the beginning of the year. So Toyota is a
• 13:58
  Speaker 4: partner a Pole and they have their own discount system.
• 14:02
  Speaker 4: But so do shot back? Shot back has ampole? So
• 14:06
  Speaker 4: and I live in an area where there it takes
• 14:09
  Speaker 4: twenty minutes to get from one card to the other,
• 14:11
  Speaker 4: Like I, you know, it's very very small plays so
• 14:14
  Speaker 4: there's ampoles like everywhere.
• 14:16
  Speaker 1: So how do you do it?
• 14:17
  Speaker 4: Tell us? Like?
• 14:18
  Speaker 1: Do I just show my shot back at card at
• 14:21
  Speaker 1: am pole?
• 14:21
  Speaker 4: Like?
• 14:22
  Speaker 1: I don't know. I can't work out in my brain
• 14:24
  Speaker 1: how I would facilitate this.
• 14:26
  Speaker 4: So I pre purchase my petrol twenty five dollars at
• 14:29
  Speaker 4: a time, yep, every fortnight weekly. If I feel like
• 14:34
  Speaker 4: chucking an extra twenty five in but I do it
• 14:36
  Speaker 4: in advance, so I always have money for fuel. Yeah,
• 14:40
  Speaker 4: and I always have twenty five dollars for the next week.
• 14:44
  Speaker 4: So then I got I fill my car and I
• 14:46
  Speaker 4: either pay the difference or I use to cards and
• 14:48
  Speaker 4: then I get shot back on the petrol cards. So
• 14:51
  Speaker 4: I just go and scanm my petrol card from the
• 14:53
  Speaker 4: shot back app.
• 14:54
  Speaker 1: You are so smart. I am one hundred million. Thank
• 14:57
  Speaker 1: you so much for around the corner from a house
• 15:00
  Speaker 1: literally wild catch you with the bowser all right. Next question,
• 15:06
  Speaker 1: I want to know what is your best money habit.
• 15:09
  Speaker 4: I think education, Like that sounds very privileged, but I
• 15:13
  Speaker 4: think I know where everything kind of is in my area. Again,
• 15:19
  Speaker 4: I think that just comes with living in a small area.
• 15:21
  Speaker 4: But I know that, like I can get nappies from
• 15:24
  Speaker 4: wor Worse instead of Oh well, I can get them
• 15:26
  Speaker 4: from a big w instead of Worse if I wanted to,
• 15:29
  Speaker 4: and they're the same price, so I don't have to
• 15:31
  Speaker 4: do that extra trip. Or like I know, so my
• 15:35
  Speaker 4: fish tank broke, for example, I just contacted came out
• 15:38
  Speaker 4: and I was like, hey, my fish tank broke, and
• 15:40
  Speaker 4: they're like, okay, we'll raise it for free.
• 15:42
  Speaker 1: Instead of just going out and buying wine buy Why Yeah,
• 15:45
  Speaker 1: you know how to be resourceful? Yeah yeah, I think
• 15:49
  Speaker 1: that's so smart, Like that is such a good money
• 15:51
  Speaker 1: win skill because so many of us would just like
• 15:54
  Speaker 1: be like, oh fish tank broke, like gotta buy, gotta
• 15:57
  Speaker 1: buy a new one. Like I'm very guilty of that
• 16:00
  Speaker 1: sometimes when I should take things back because I'm like,
• 16:03
  Speaker 1: I just I hate asking for a refund. I hate
• 16:06
  Speaker 1: doing that. You probably surprising coming from me, given I'm
• 16:09
  Speaker 1: the most audacious, funny person you've probably ever met. But
• 16:12
  Speaker 1: I just don't like that interaction. But I also know
• 16:15
  Speaker 1: that that's what I should be doing. So when people
• 16:17
  Speaker 1: like I'm good at that, I'm like, I wish I
• 16:19
  Speaker 1: had more of your confidence. I hate going up to
• 16:21
  Speaker 1: the front desk.
• 16:22
  Speaker 4: Yeah, it's like red rolls are cheaper at Coals to
• 16:25
  Speaker 4: buy them individually than they are dependment Baker's delight by
• 16:28
  Speaker 4: like twenty cents, so really coals. Yeah, so it's just like.
• 16:33
  Speaker 1: Knowing where to go and what to do.
• 16:35
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 16:36
  Speaker 1: Yeah, oh my gosh, I love that.
• 16:38
  Speaker 4: Especially have a crying baby.
• 16:39
  Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I was gonna say. That's actually such an
• 16:42
  Speaker 1: important point as well, because like mums sometimes just rely
• 16:46
  Speaker 1: on convenience, and you're like, I can even do this
• 16:48
  Speaker 1: while she's screaming this is great. I'm a genius flipping
• 16:52
  Speaker 1: this on its head. What is your worst money habit?
• 16:55
  Speaker 4: Probably food, I think everyone likes too, at least like
• 17:01
  Speaker 4: a little splurge on food. I guess because I'm vegan.
• 17:04
  Speaker 4: Food's really expensive, yes, and I choose to eat gluten
• 17:10
  Speaker 4: free options because I have an autoimune condition so that
• 17:14
  Speaker 4: it makes it even more expensive. But I'm just like,
• 17:16
  Speaker 4: oh my god, a new vegan thing.
• 17:17
  Speaker 3: I have that.
• 17:18
  Speaker 4: Oh, Someone's like, do you want to go out? I'm
• 17:20
  Speaker 4: just like, yeah, I have that that.
• 17:22
  Speaker 1: Like, yeah, it's so hard when it comes out.
• 17:24
  Speaker 4: And then I look at my bank account and I'm like,
• 17:26
  Speaker 4: I ate all that awayeees.
• 17:28
  Speaker 1: Yeah, not great. But I feel like a lot of
• 17:30
  Speaker 1: us can probably relate to that, because I definitely did.
• 17:34
  Speaker 1: The second I see a new plant based option, I'm like,
• 17:36
  Speaker 1: I'm gonna get that. That is great, And gluten free
• 17:39
  Speaker 1: bread is ridiculously expensive for no good reason. Kind of
• 17:42
  Speaker 1: rude money diarist. Last question of the set of questions
• 17:46
  Speaker 1: before we do a bit more of a deep dive,
• 17:49
  Speaker 1: is what grade would you give your money habits. If
• 17:51
  Speaker 1: we forced you to give yourself a grade, probably like
• 17:54
  Speaker 1: a bee.
• 17:55
  Speaker 4: I was like, I'm a really good saver, Like I
• 17:57
  Speaker 4: save more than eighty percent ofway income every single fortnight. Yeah,
• 18:02
  Speaker 4: I do. And I am very frugal. So I only
• 18:07
  Speaker 4: buy things when I absolutely want them or I have
• 18:09
  Speaker 4: been thinking about them for a long time, and I
• 18:11
  Speaker 4: always maybe it's stingy, but when it comes to my daughter,
• 18:16
  Speaker 4: like she has my family who give her everything she wants,
• 18:20
  Speaker 4: so when she wants something, it's like either on the
• 18:23
  Speaker 4: chipper side, or I'll pull out something from a storage
• 18:26
  Speaker 4: container and be.
• 18:26
  Speaker 1: Like here, yeah, yeah, epic everything like that.
• 18:32
  Speaker 4: Yeah, So I tend not to buy things for her.
• 18:34
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's fair. That's fair. I've heard of. Is it
• 18:38
  Speaker 1: toy recycling where you're like, oh sorry, toy cycling where
• 18:41
  Speaker 1: you like hide their toys from them and then they
• 18:43
  Speaker 1: think that they're new again. It's like a big people
• 18:45
  Speaker 1: do that to me with clothes. I feel like I
• 18:47
  Speaker 1: should actually get into the habit of cycle them through.
• 18:49
  Speaker 3: I think it's a montessory thing where you have a
• 18:52
  Speaker 3: set amount out because kids only focus on a certain
• 18:54
  Speaker 3: number of things at a time and then they forget
• 18:56
  Speaker 3: what's put away and then it's like it's brand new again.
• 18:58
  Speaker 3: You're right, like, why would you buy something when you
• 19:00
  Speaker 3: can just pull it out two months later they're.
• 19:02
  Speaker 1: Like, oh my god, this is the best toy ever.
• 19:04
  Speaker 1: You're literally going to be the best.
• 19:05
  Speaker 3: Mum.
• 19:06
  Speaker 1: I don't want to talk about it. Let's go to
• 19:07
  Speaker 1: a break and then we're going to deep dive on
• 19:09
  Speaker 1: our money direst because I just feel like I'm going
• 19:12
  Speaker 1: to look like a terrible future mum. I continue here.
• 19:14
  Speaker 1: All right, all right, we are back money Diarist. You
• 19:23
  Speaker 1: have a really interesting money story that I think a
• 19:25
  Speaker 1: lot of our community can really connect with. You're a
• 19:28
  Speaker 1: single mum, You've been through a lot to get to
• 19:30
  Speaker 1: this stage. You have a gorgeous two, your old daughter.
• 19:32
  Speaker 1: Now you have eleven streams of income, which is beyond impressive.
• 19:38
  Speaker 1: Obviously they're all small and all require work and energy
• 19:41
  Speaker 1: and effort, and I'm genuinely so impressed. But I want
• 19:44
  Speaker 1: to know a bit more about your situation. In your
• 19:47
  Speaker 1: money diary, you wrote in and said, look, I've gotten
• 19:50
  Speaker 1: out of a domestically violent relationship. How did you decide
• 19:54
  Speaker 1: that now was the time? I just can't I'm going
• 19:56
  Speaker 1: to go live with my parents, and you know this
• 19:59
  Speaker 1: is my re reality.
• 20:00
  Speaker 4: I guess the option to leave my relationship was forced
• 20:05
  Speaker 4: upon me. So I was the one who ended my
• 20:07
  Speaker 4: relationship because I had put up with over a year
• 20:10
  Speaker 4: of trying to the point where it was like I
• 20:13
  Speaker 4: was just flogging that dead horse. I was just trying
• 20:15
  Speaker 4: for no absolutely no reason, just to keep my daughter
• 20:18
  Speaker 4: safe and happy and give her that fairy tale family
• 20:23
  Speaker 4: because I didn't want her to grow up in a
• 20:25
  Speaker 4: broken home, and that clouded my judgment on how I
• 20:28
  Speaker 4: felt about the situation for so long. So we just
• 20:32
  Speaker 4: kind of came to a flat end. Like it's quite
• 20:35
  Speaker 4: hard to explain because it all just went, but like
• 20:38
  Speaker 4: it just everything died off. The relationship died off, the
• 20:42
  Speaker 4: communication died off, the quality of time died off, the
• 20:45
  Speaker 4: quality of care for my daughter died off. There was
• 20:49
  Speaker 4: a lot of throwing things, a lot of shouting, a
• 20:50
  Speaker 4: lot of things that just were not sitting well with me,
• 20:53
  Speaker 4: to the point where I was like, you need to leave.
• 20:56
  Speaker 4: And then he took his clothes, his PS four and
• 20:59
  Speaker 4: never came back.
• 21:00
  Speaker 1: Wow.
• 21:01
  Speaker 4: Because we lived in a rental, I couldn't afford that
• 21:04
  Speaker 4: on my own course. So then I had to leave
• 21:07
  Speaker 4: and I had to take everything we owned with me.
• 21:10
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's a lot to carry, that's a lot to
• 21:12
  Speaker 1: go through.
• 21:13
  Speaker 4: It was quite hard. It took over six months to
• 21:16
  Speaker 4: sell everything I owned in a storage unit, plus paying
• 21:19
  Speaker 4: for storage. And I didn't want to go back to
• 21:22
  Speaker 4: my family. I didn't have anywhere else to go either,
• 21:25
  Speaker 4: and that person kept showing up at my house and
• 21:28
  Speaker 4: demanding to see my child, and that was just too much.
• 21:32
  Speaker 4: So I got a lawyer involved.
• 21:35
  Speaker 1: Which is very fair and a very intelligent step. How
• 21:38
  Speaker 1: did that go for you?
• 21:39
  Speaker 4: That was difficult, I guess because I had gone from
• 21:45
  Speaker 4: having a lot of savings to having no savings, to
• 21:49
  Speaker 4: having my own money which he wasn't able to access,
• 21:54
  Speaker 4: which is another issue of our relationship, to then having
• 21:57
  Speaker 4: to give it all away and not have any safety
• 22:00
  Speaker 4: in it, and not have any thing for myself. We
• 22:04
  Speaker 4: also live in a small area. Like I said, every
• 22:07
  Speaker 4: time I call up there would be like, okay, let
• 22:09
  Speaker 4: me take your name down, here's my name. Let me
• 22:11
  Speaker 4: take his name down, here's his name. Oh sorry, conflict
• 22:14
  Speaker 4: of interest. We can't help you. Oh sorry, conflict of interests.
• 22:16
  Speaker 4: We can't help you. So I was kept getting.
• 22:18
  Speaker 1: Roadblocks, and that's because your partner had spoken to that lawyer, right, yes,
• 22:23
  Speaker 1: And was that a strategy he had implemented on purpose
• 22:26
  Speaker 1: or was that a strategy that he'd just had a
• 22:28
  Speaker 1: chat with a few lawyers, because I know that in
• 22:31
  Speaker 1: situations like that sometimes one party will inquire with a
• 22:34
  Speaker 1: lawyer to block the other party out from using them.
• 22:36
  Speaker 4: I think it's a bit of both. I mean, we
• 22:38
  Speaker 4: suspect that he did a lot of manipulation, but we
• 22:42
  Speaker 4: also don't think he is smart enough to manipulate. So
• 22:48
  Speaker 4: it's a bit of like a don't give yeah, it's
• 22:52
  Speaker 4: more of an assumption, I suppose.
• 22:53
  Speaker 3: I want to ask a little bit about your being
• 22:55
  Speaker 3: on welfare, because we actually put out I don't remember
• 22:58
  Speaker 3: if you responded specifically to this host potentially, but we
• 23:01
  Speaker 3: wanted to talk to a diarist who was living off
• 23:03
  Speaker 3: of welfare because I think that there's a really big
• 23:06
  Speaker 3: stigma attached to people who utilize welfare resources, and I
• 23:11
  Speaker 3: think that often people carry shame with them that they
• 23:15
  Speaker 3: absolutely just shouldn't have to. I want to know for you,
• 23:18
  Speaker 3: how did you feel going from obviously an incredibly challenging
• 23:22
  Speaker 3: situation you said you didn't want to move back in
• 23:23
  Speaker 3: with your parents, you maybe felt a little bit stuck.
• 23:27
  Speaker 3: Did you experience any of those feelings and how did
• 23:30
  Speaker 3: you kind of move past them.
• 23:32
  Speaker 4: I definitely did experience some stigma with being on welfare
• 23:37
  Speaker 4: because my family are very against welfare. So both of
• 23:41
  Speaker 4: my parents' parents have been on welfare basically their whole lives,
• 23:46
  Speaker 4: especially my dad's family. I don't think they've ever worked
• 23:49
  Speaker 4: today in their life. So my mom especially, she looked
• 23:53
  Speaker 4: down on welfare, and I didn't want her to look
• 23:56
  Speaker 4: down on me. But as our relationship started to mend
• 24:01
  Speaker 4: itself by having my daughter, by being in the house,
• 24:04
  Speaker 4: by talking to her about what actually goes on in
• 24:06
  Speaker 4: my life when I think what I feel being diagnosed
• 24:09
  Speaker 4: with the exact same autoimmune condition. It opened up her
• 24:14
  Speaker 4: eyes to what my life can be now that I'm
• 24:18
  Speaker 4: on welfare because I have stability, I have the option
• 24:21
  Speaker 4: to stay in bed an extra bit longer, I have
• 24:23
  Speaker 4: the option to go to the park for five hours
• 24:25
  Speaker 4: instead of one like It helped her see the benefit,
• 24:31
  Speaker 4: although she still does see the downfall. And I think
• 24:34
  Speaker 4: when I tell people like, oh, I'm on welfare, no,
• 24:36
  Speaker 4: you can't get a colone. No, you can't get a
• 24:38
  Speaker 4: home load. So it stopped me progressing in my future
• 24:42
  Speaker 4: as well.
• 24:42
  Speaker 1: Yeah, of course, Yeah.
• 24:44
  Speaker 4: It's a bit. I don't know. It's hard to tell
• 24:46
  Speaker 4: people when they're like, oh, what do you do And
• 24:48
  Speaker 4: I'm like, I'm a stay at home mum, because they're like, oh,
• 24:53
  Speaker 4: you're a stay at home mum. It's like, actually, my
• 24:54
  Speaker 4: daughter and I both the happiest we have been in
• 24:57
  Speaker 4: our entire lives. And she's safe because I don't have
• 25:00
  Speaker 4: to leave, yeah, because I can stay home. Yeah.
• 25:03
  Speaker 1: And I think that that's so important to point out
• 25:05
  Speaker 1: as well, because for a lot of people who are
• 25:08
  Speaker 1: on welfare, it's not a choice, Like you didn't choose
• 25:10
  Speaker 1: to go down this rooge. Like, I'm sure in a
• 25:13
  Speaker 1: perfect world that is not how you wanted it to
• 25:15
  Speaker 1: work out, but it is how it works out. And
• 25:17
  Speaker 1: I'm genuinely so grateful we live in a country where
• 25:20
  Speaker 1: we have that support that you can stay at home.
• 25:24
  Speaker 1: And it sounds like you are an absolute hustler as well,
• 25:27
  Speaker 1: so I don't think that's going to be your reality forever.
• 25:30
  Speaker 1: So it's so nice that you've got that bridging finance
• 25:33
  Speaker 1: in a way to go do you know what, here's
• 25:35
  Speaker 1: this so you can get on your feet and you
• 25:37
  Speaker 1: can have the stability and then you can thrive later.
• 25:40
  Speaker 1: And I think that that's, you know, the way a
• 25:43
  Speaker 1: lot of our community sees welfare and sees that thing,
• 25:46
  Speaker 1: like whether you're on what is it youth allowance or
• 25:48
  Speaker 1: you know, a parenting pension or a disability payment, like
• 25:51
  Speaker 1: most of us are in that situation. Because it's just
• 25:55
  Speaker 1: the situation. It is what it is, and that's great.
• 25:58
  Speaker 1: Let's also work on ourselves, work out where we actually
• 26:01
  Speaker 1: want to be, because I think that there's this stigma
• 26:03
  Speaker 1: when you say welfare that you go, oh, well, you
• 26:05
  Speaker 1: just missed be a doll b lodger, when that's actually
• 26:07
  Speaker 1: not the case at all. It's so situational, and I
• 26:12
  Speaker 1: feel like too many people just assume the worst the
• 26:14
  Speaker 1: second you say that word, and that's not what that
• 26:17
  Speaker 1: means at all. Like the idea that welfare exists and
• 26:21
  Speaker 1: this beautiful mum got out of a financially and you know,
• 26:25
  Speaker 1: domestically violent situation and now can support her child, I'm
• 26:29
  Speaker 1: all for.
• 26:30
  Speaker 3: It, yeah, one thousand percent. And it doesn't mean that
• 26:33
  Speaker 3: you have to sit there forever either. You said just
• 26:35
  Speaker 3: before that, you know, you kind of had to put
• 26:37
  Speaker 3: your career on hold. What do you want your future
• 26:40
  Speaker 3: to look like? What are your plans?
• 26:42
  Speaker 4: So I guess, like, as I said before, I'm just
• 26:45
  Speaker 4: like starting to dip my toes in finance. So I
• 26:47
  Speaker 4: started looking into personal finance for myself. And so I
• 26:53
  Speaker 4: made a shift. It's very interesting shift, and I was
• 26:57
  Speaker 4: explaining it to my current CEO and she's like, I
• 26:59
  Speaker 4: don't get it. So I worked in childcare for eight years.
• 27:01
  Speaker 4: I worked on the floor with children every day. I
• 27:04
  Speaker 4: then ran my own center and then got pregnant after
• 27:09
  Speaker 4: a year and a half of being with somebody, and
• 27:12
  Speaker 4: then by the time she was three months, he was gone.
• 27:14
  Speaker 4: So I was like, I can't cope being with the children.
• 27:17
  Speaker 4: It's too trickering considering we do the same job. There's
• 27:20
  Speaker 4: a lot of downfalls to being with children all day,
• 27:24
  Speaker 4: every day when you're just not mentally coping.
• 27:27
  Speaker 1: Yep.
• 27:27
  Speaker 4: I went and looked for an alternative job, which was
• 27:30
  Speaker 4: in admin. So I had done my business certificate and
• 27:33
  Speaker 4: I started working in admin. And then my boss was
• 27:35
  Speaker 4: like telling me all about how they split the cost
• 27:39
  Speaker 4: of the parents and their children and what room gets,
• 27:43
  Speaker 4: what and I found that really interesting. So then I
• 27:45
  Speaker 4: started my personal finance journey. So then I started at
• 27:48
  Speaker 4: the beginning of the year that I would try out
• 27:50
  Speaker 4: working in finance. I started studying in finance, and I
• 27:54
  Speaker 4: guess that's where I'm going to go with my career.
• 27:56
  Speaker 4: I've gone away from working in a school age environ
• 28:00
  Speaker 4: and childcare environment to working more with my mind and
• 28:03
  Speaker 4: less with my body. And I think having an auto
• 28:06
  Speaker 4: imane condition. I can't do the long hours. I don't
• 28:10
  Speaker 4: have the energy to be with other people's children. I
• 28:13
  Speaker 4: barely have enough for myself after I've been with my
• 28:16
  Speaker 4: daughter all day. So that's where my life's going to go.
• 28:19
  Speaker 4: So I'm more focused on being happy and present. And
• 28:23
  Speaker 4: because my case is not officially closed, so he's gone.
• 28:27
  Speaker 4: Don't know how he went. He just disappeared. He least
• 28:30
  Speaker 4: twenty minutes down the road, which is very scary, so
• 28:32
  Speaker 4: he can shot up and just take my daughter whenever
• 28:34
  Speaker 4: he wants. So I just trying to try and be present.
• 28:38
  Speaker 4: And yeah, that's why I guess I stayed on welfare,
• 28:41
  Speaker 4: because although I love to work and I love to learn,
• 28:45
  Speaker 4: if I want to have an extra day to just
• 28:48
  Speaker 4: be with her, then I can and I won't regret
• 28:51
  Speaker 4: it if something were to happen. Yeah.
• 28:53
  Speaker 1: Wow, thank you for sharing that. That's really challenging to
• 28:57
  Speaker 1: think that that's overlaid onto your decision to go. Do
• 29:00
  Speaker 1: you know what, I just want to stay here doing
• 29:03
  Speaker 1: this for now, to be present for my daughter. It's
• 29:05
  Speaker 1: a very special decision to be able to make, and
• 29:08
  Speaker 1: I'm sure that she is absolutely thrilled by that decision
• 29:12
  Speaker 1: the time. She's like, this is the best I am
• 29:15
  Speaker 1: living my best life. But what will it mean in
• 29:17
  Speaker 1: the future. You said your case isn't closed. Is that
• 29:20
  Speaker 1: circumstance going to change significantly? Maybe once it is.
• 29:24
  Speaker 4: It's hard to say because I don't know if her
• 29:28
  Speaker 4: father will return. Like like I said, he lives very
• 29:32
  Speaker 4: close he you know, he's always on the topic of
• 29:36
  Speaker 4: her life for her. He can just show up and
• 29:39
  Speaker 4: take her. The case is not officially closed, no letter
• 29:43
  Speaker 4: saying hey, you're going to full time parent. It's just
• 29:45
  Speaker 4: an expectation that I do and I have done it
• 29:47
  Speaker 4: since the day she was born. So if he was
• 29:50
  Speaker 4: to show up, that would be a lot of money
• 29:52
  Speaker 4: to fork out as well. Like they told me last
• 29:55
  Speaker 4: year that if I was to go to court. I'd
• 29:57
  Speaker 4: probably not win. I'd probably end up we shared care
• 30:01
  Speaker 4: and it would cost me one hundred thousand dollars. And
• 30:03
  Speaker 4: if I'm not showing that I'm being true to supporting
• 30:08
  Speaker 4: their relationship, I then have to pay his bill as well.
• 30:11
  Speaker 4: Yeah wow, Yeah, and lawyers are not cheap. My lawyer
• 30:15
  Speaker 4: is like five fifteen hour and she charges every six minutes.
• 30:18
  Speaker 1: Yeah for her time. Yeah, that's crazy.
• 30:20
  Speaker 4: Yeah. So I have to keep in mind that if
• 30:24
  Speaker 4: he was to return, it's not just an emotional thing,
• 30:26
  Speaker 4: it's also a financial thing. He'll be able to come
• 30:29
  Speaker 4: after everything I now own, He'll be able to get
• 30:31
  Speaker 4: my daughter. He'll be like, I'll be up for thousands
• 30:34
  Speaker 4: of dollars, possibly hundreds of thousand dollars if it goes
• 30:36
  Speaker 4: to court. So I just want to be present and
• 30:39
  Speaker 4: be with her until that happens.
• 30:41
  Speaker 1: That's such a hard decision to make. But I'm really
• 30:43
  Speaker 1: proud that you're so clear on what you are doing,
• 30:46
  Speaker 1: because I think historically when I've spoken to people about
• 30:49
  Speaker 1: similar situations, they're just like, I just don't know what
• 30:52
  Speaker 1: I want to do, And you seem so clear that
• 30:54
  Speaker 1: you're like, I just want to spend as much time
• 30:56
  Speaker 1: with my daughter and just be present. I think that
• 30:58
  Speaker 1: that's such a beautiful space to be in during a
• 31:00
  Speaker 1: time where you arguably have a lot of turmoil surrounding you,
• 31:04
  Speaker 1: Like that's a lot to deal with, but I think
• 31:06
  Speaker 1: you're doing a very beautiful job, my friend. Thank you
• 31:10
  Speaker 1: all right, Jess, I think unfortunately that is all we
• 31:13
  Speaker 1: have time for today, money direst. I have adored learning
• 31:16
  Speaker 1: about your story. Thank you for sharing so much of
• 31:18
  Speaker 1: yourself and your daughter's story with us. I think it's
• 31:21
  Speaker 1: been so powerful to understand where you're coming from and
• 31:24
  Speaker 1: how things are benefiting you, but also how it's so challenging.
• 31:28
  Speaker 1: Like I feel like so many people in our community
• 31:29
  Speaker 1: are really going to resonate with this story or even
• 31:32
  Speaker 1: just have a better understanding of people in your position.
• 31:36
  Speaker 1: So I'm really grateful that you were here today to
• 31:38
  Speaker 1: share that with us. So thank you, Jess. Can you
• 31:43
  Speaker 1: wrap the boring but important stuff?
• 31:44
  Speaker 3: Of course, don't forget, guys, the advice shared on She's
• 31:47
  Speaker 3: on the Money is generally nature and does not consider
• 31:49
  Speaker 3: your individual circumstances.
• 31:51
  Speaker 1: She's on the Money.
• 31:52
  Speaker 3: Exists purely for educational purposes and should not be relied
• 31:55
  Speaker 3: upon to make an investment or, a financial decision, and
• 31:58
  Speaker 3: we promise Victoria Devine and she's on the money. Are
• 32:00
  Speaker 3: authorized representatives of Infocused Securities Australia Proprietary Limited, A b
• 32:04
  Speaker 3: N four seven oh nine seven seven nine seven O
• 32:07
  Speaker 3: four nine AFS L two three six five two three.
• 32:10
  Speaker 1: See you on Wednesday, guys.
• 32:11
  Speaker 3: Bye,