009. Standing Up for Yourself in Your Relationship

Heal First Then Pick Your Life Partner: Relational Recovery When You Have CPTSD · Oct 27, 2026 · 43m

Standing up for yourself isn't a skill you're missing. It's a position you can't hold while Parts of you are running trauma energies to manage what feels like an attachment threat.

Survivors tend to swing between two false versions of power. On one side is grandiosity: the hero who is the only one responsible, the only one who can, proud and quietly being used; or the lone wolf who doesn't need anybody. On the other side is shame: the smallness of "I'm bad," or the disgust of "I'm not worth it." Neither is standing up for yourself. Both are adaptations.

In this episode I walk through all four…