Latest / Your Money, Your Rules | Financial Mastery, Wealth Mindset, Leadership Principles, Intuitive Decision-Making, Human Design / 77 | Overthinking Everything in Business? Use Human Design + Nervous System Regulation to Lead with Clarity (with Carmen Tuleta)

Transcript

77 | Overthinking Everything in Business? Use Human Design + Nervous System Regulation to Lead with Clarity (with Carmen Tuleta) · Your Money, Your Rules | Financial Mastery, Wealth Mindset, Leadership Principles, Intuitive Decision-Making, Human Design

• 0:00
  Erin Gray: You're listening to Generate a Life Well-Lived podcast.
• 0:02
  Erin Gray: I'm your friend and confidant, erin Gray.
• 0:04
  Erin Gray: On this podcast, we will explore all things money, business and self-development, including human design.
• 0:10
  Erin Gray: I hope you enjoy the journey where I share everything that I know and am continuing to learn along the way, as I honor my heart's desires while inspiring and encouraging you to do the same.
• 0:20
  Erin Gray: Hi, how are you?
• 0:22
  Erin Gray: It's snowing here today.
• 0:24
  Erin Gray: It's not cold enough or it's just right above the threshold for it to actually stick, but it is pretty.
• 0:32
  Erin Gray: Watching it, I still have some thoughts about how cold it is here, so I'll keep you posted on that.
• 0:40
  Erin Gray: On today's podcast, I brought back my good friend, carmen Toledo.
• 0:45
  Erin Gray: Carmen is your go-to guide for all things human design, energy work and intuitive living.
• 0:51
  Erin Gray: She helps people uncover their unique gifts, reconnect with their energy and make choices that truly feel right for them.
• 0:59
  Erin Gray: She uses a mix of human design, tarot and Reiki to help her clients break free from burnout, gain clarity and step into their authentic selves.
• 1:09
  Erin Gray: She's been on the podcast multiple times.
• 1:12
  Erin Gray: I love having her on.
• 1:13
  Erin Gray: We talk about human design most of the time when we come on and just weave it into personal development.
• 1:21
  Erin Gray: Through Carmen's human design readings and workshops, she shares practical strategies tailored to your unique energy, making it easier to navigate life in a way that feels good and sustainable to you.
• 1:34
  Erin Gray: As always, thank you for listening, for spending your time with us.
• 1:39
  Erin Gray: Okay, my friends, I've got my good friend and colleague, carmen Toledo back on the podcast, so thanks, carmen, for being here.
• 1:47
  Carmen Tuleta: Oh gosh, I love doing this with you.
• 1:49
  Carmen Tuleta: Thank you for the invitation.
• 1:51
  Erin Gray: Yeah.
• 1:51
  Erin Gray: So we were talking before and I was just like, fuck it, let's just hit record, because we're literally talking about the podcast while we're not recording, so okay.
• 2:01
  Erin Gray: So on today's podcast, we're going to talk about what I call iterating in our head and what I noticed with myself, with other colleagues of mine, with clients, like this is what we do, and to me, iterating in our head iterating with thought versus action is we think about something we almost like gameplay it out in our head before we take action, versus just taking the action, getting the data, getting feeling the feelings and then taking another step.
• 2:32
  Erin Gray: How has this, if you're open to it, how has this shown up for you?
• 2:35
  Erin Gray: I'll also talk about how it shows up for me.
• 2:37
  Carmen Tuleta: Oh, it shows up in all the places.
• 2:39
  Carmen Tuleta: For me, I am a chronic overthinker, but something that has helped me with that is definitely um learning my human design and how that impacts me.
• 2:52
  Carmen Tuleta: Um, but it definitely shows up.
• 2:53
  Carmen Tuleta: Like you said, I plan out exactly how things are going to go in my head and all of the steps that have to take and all of the steps that I have to take, or all of the what ifs right come up and, like you said, it's a form of procrastination, it's a way of and I think it's a way of keeping ourselves safe, because our minds want to keep ourselves safe because they're brilliant.
• 3:21
  Carmen Tuleta: Right, our minds are brilliant things.
• 3:23
  Carmen Tuleta: So, yeah, for me it is definitely um, keeps me safe, um, um, that unknown thing, and I think in this world that we live in, we haven't been taught how to sit in that unknown, yeah for sure.
• 3:42
  Erin Gray: We were talking about that earlier today and I think that.
• 3:44
  Erin Gray: Well, first of all, I think that all of us, if we go to school in the traditional way, it rewards you for thinking, for planning out, for you know you get good grades because you like, had this, do some shit and come back and like, tell me how it went Right.
• 4:00
  Erin Gray: It's very much so like a thought out cerebral process which is very conducive to following the leader nine to five thinking, which I mean I've done nine to five, so hey, I'm not bashing on that.
• 4:20
  Erin Gray: And also, like nine to five does not prep you for entrepreneurship at all.
• 4:24
  Erin Gray: Right, it keeps you in that like, hey, am I doing it right?
• 4:26
  Erin Gray: Did I?
• 4:27
  Erin Gray: You know, what do you think about this?
• 4:28
  Erin Gray: It keeps us, I think, from an outsourcing our power and like someone else knows the answer, versus no, we just got to do the thing.
• 4:37
  Erin Gray: And then what do we, you know, think and feel about this?
• 4:46
  Carmen Tuleta: Right.
• 4:46
  Carmen Tuleta: And even when we're kids I don't know how many times even to my children I've said this use your head.
• 4:50
  Carmen Tuleta: Yeah, what were you thinking?
• 4:53
  Carmen Tuleta: Use your head.
• 4:53
  Carmen Tuleta: And a lot of times they're just using their, not like they haven't been told enough already that life doesn't work like that.
• 5:11
  Erin Gray: Yeah, yeah, and so when, when, when we are in our heads and you have an undefined head in Ajna, I have an undefined head in Ajna.
• 5:21
  Carmen Tuleta: Okay, well, I have a defined head.
• 5:23
  Erin Gray: Three centers defined.
• 5:23
  Erin Gray: Yes, that's true.
• 5:23
  Carmen Tuleta: Okay, I have a defined head in Ajna?
• 5:24
  Carmen Tuleta: Okay, well, I have a defined head.
• 5:24
  Erin Gray: Three centers defined.
• 5:25
  Erin Gray: Yes, that's true.
• 5:25
  Erin Gray: Okay, I have a defined head in Ajna, and here's where I'm like I totally dig human design and also like it's, you know, just something to play with and use.
• 5:33
  Erin Gray: Because here we go, you have two people who have opposite and we're still experiencing the same thing, right?
• 5:40
  Erin Gray: So I think sometimes with human design, we can get attached to like, oh well, I have this center defined.
• 5:45
  Erin Gray: So I can't, like I and you've heard me on previous podcasts right Like never use human design to disempower yourself, but just recognize Carmen has no head and ogen defined.
• 5:55
  Erin Gray: I do have a head and ogen defined and we're still doing this because, I agree with you, I think it comes back to safety.
• 6:00
  Erin Gray: I think it comes back to getting outside our comfort zones.
• 6:04
  Erin Gray: It feels really uncomfortable to do things, one that we haven't done yet and we're not that practiced and our skillset isn't built up quite yet.
• 6:16
  Erin Gray: I mean, I think all of us are a different place, right, where we get to feel, because you have to ask yourself, what am I unwilling to feel right now If I were just Right, it's that uncomfortableness, right?
• 6:31
  Carmen Tuleta: Yeah, I'm just going to backtrack for a second, when you were talking about human design and that using it as a tool versus an end-all be-all.
• 6:41
  Carmen Tuleta: Yeah, I love to look at our human design body graph, whatever you want to call it.
• 6:48
  Carmen Tuleta: We all have the same parts, yes, whether they're defined or not, right?
• 6:53
  Carmen Tuleta: So we're all people, we're all going to have these thoughts, feelings, emotions, whatever, regardless of what definition is in our chart.
• 7:02
  Carmen Tuleta: So making it significant really doesn't do anyone justice, right?
• 7:09
  Carmen Tuleta: Yeah.
• 7:10
  Erin Gray: So I want to clarify.
• 7:12
  Erin Gray: So what you're saying is we're all human, we all have emotions, we all have thoughts like take away the human design.
• 7:17
  Erin Gray: Like we're all created equal in the sense of, like we have those feelings and sensations and thoughts that are coming up and, at the basis, like, biologically, we want to stay safe.
• 7:28
  Erin Gray: Is what you're saying right?
• 7:29
  Erin Gray: Absolutely.
• 7:31
  Carmen Tuleta: Yeah, yes, in a simplistic, more simplistic way.
• 7:35
  Carmen Tuleta: Thank you.
• 7:37
  Erin Gray: In a very simplistic way.
• 7:38
  Erin Gray: So for people that are listening and they're like okay, that's great, but how do I actually do this?
• 7:47
  Erin Gray: How do I and here's okay, let me back up, here's the other thing I'm not saying just take action.
• 7:53
  Erin Gray: I remember my uncle used to be like we're just going to take action, even if it's the wrong way, and then, but at least we're taking action.
• 8:02
  Erin Gray: I agree somewhat.
• 8:04
  Erin Gray: And then I also think that some can be a little bit crazy, right, like, if you're just making like, if you're taking very chaotic action, I don't want you to be taking chaotic action Like.
• 8:12
  Erin Gray: There has to be direction.
• 8:14
  Erin Gray: Yeah, you know, he was just definitely like I'm sure he's probably a man.
• 8:19
  Erin Gray: He just just like, was very much of like we're just going to go do the thing, and it doesn't even matter if it's the wrong way, we'll figure it, you know.
• 8:24
  Erin Gray: And and there is actually, you know there is truth.
• 8:27
  Erin Gray: There is some truth in that, right Like, because if it is the wrong way, you will know, because you will have data, you will have some experiences that you can be like timeout.
• 8:37
  Erin Gray: Okay, we are in the wrong direction.
• 8:43
  Erin Gray: So I'm not advocating to just go take action and hustle and just go do the thing, but what I am suggesting is that you do get faster at taking action when you are moving, in alignment with your decision-making skills or your type or whatever you know.
• 9:00
  Erin Gray: Like, once I have ridden my wave and I do feel that, okay, I need to, like we were just the other day, we were moving, we're moving some of our IRA to purchase some silver and totally, like, had the conversation ridden my wave, know what's happening in the market, like, know all the things, right, and so it's Jason's account, his IRA, and so, as we're doing that, he's like good done, you know.
• 9:27
  Erin Gray: And I'm like, uh, and he's like what are you doing?
• 9:30
  Erin Gray: And I'm like I don't know, I just feel a little bit.
• 9:32
  Erin Gray: He's like Aaron, it's literally silver.
• 9:33
  Erin Gray: And I'm like, uh, and he's like what are you doing?
• 9:33
  Erin Gray: And I'm like I don't know, I just feel a little bit.
• 9:34
  Erin Gray: He's like Aaron, it's literally silver.
• 9:34
  Erin Gray: And I'm like I know, but just that, that, like what you were saying, that uncomfortableness of, uh, it's a little bit different than what we've done before.
• 9:43
  Erin Gray: This is new, right, like, and and so, recognizing, I was seeing myself being like, okay, I could procrastinate, right, like, I could take longer to fill out the form and to like get back to her.
• 9:57
  Erin Gray: Like no Erin, you felt good, you already made the decision move.
• 10:01
  Carmen Tuleta: So so, even as evolved as I think I sometimes can be, when I think about where I am with my human design or where I am in life, I can still ride my wave, like you, be in a place of, okay, we're doing this thing and not do it, yep, not take the action because it feels scary, yeah.
• 10:24
  Carmen Tuleta: And when you were talking about riding or finding widening that window of tolerance, yeah, it becomes a practice, it becomes a thing that little things you do to make that uncomfortable feeling a little bit lessened each time you do it Right.
• 10:46
  Carmen Tuleta: So starting small is a big way to widen that window to be able to sit in that uncomfort.
• 10:53
  Carmen Tuleta: I mean, my window of tolerance has like exponentially gotten bigger but I still get stuck.
• 11:00
  Carmen Tuleta: I mean, we're human right, yep.
• 11:04
  Erin Gray: Yeah, and I think awareness is everything and, like you say, starting small it's not something that you know, the self-development world or just in general, right, like, I think we like love the big gains, but it's like you like consistency is as much as I don't like that word because I rebel against consistency there I do live my life with consistency.
• 11:25
  Erin Gray: You're also a generator, so you know, being consistent of like, okay, taking a little bit of action every day of something right Is so much more because you're just building up number one neural pathways.
• 11:41
  Erin Gray: You're building up, you know, window of tolerance.
• 11:44
  Erin Gray: You're building up the proudness, the satisfaction within yourself of like, look at what I did, you know.
• 11:49
  Erin Gray: So you're getting this like feedback, versus wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, and then it's so big and then it's, you know.
• 11:53
  Erin Gray: So you're getting this like feedback versus wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, and then it's so big and then it's you don't have the skillset Right and so, like you say, so, starting small, what else would you suggest for people?
• 12:03
  Carmen Tuleta: to finding tools to be able to sit with it.
• 12:07
  Carmen Tuleta: Um, when we talked about some of this this morning, you had given a really good tool about the, the five I can't remember exactly what you said and I think that that is a really good tool to bring us back into our body and, um be able to sit in that uncomfort a little bit longer than we did the previous time.
• 12:31
  Erin Gray: Yeah, what Carmen's referring to is like a five, four, three, two, one, almost just like a getting present, so like choosing five things in your current um environment.
• 12:43
  Erin Gray: You know, seeing, like, so, using your five senses, but the number five is what five things can I see?
• 12:48
  Erin Gray: So like that would be.
• 12:49
  Erin Gray: Like I see my ring light and then I see my Pellegrino and I see the clock and I see Carmen and I see the world and my little world um 3d thing, and I see my candle.
• 12:58
  Erin Gray: I think that's five right, okay, so that's five right.
• 13:01
  Erin Gray: So you're like bringing your nervous system back to the uh, parasympathetic state which is the, you know, rest and digest, and you're not in that stress state.
• 13:11
  Erin Gray: And then four would be like feel right.
• 13:13
  Erin Gray: So like you could start with your fingers or like what is my vest?
• 13:17
  Erin Gray: Feel like, so, go through that, and then three would be here.
• 13:20
  Erin Gray: So what do I hear?
• 13:20
  Erin Gray: I hear my little uh heater and I heard someone knocking on the door and I heard you know, like, so you hear these things and you're it's able to bring you back to the, to the present.
• 13:32
  Erin Gray: And then smelling is two and then tasting is one, and I'll just put that in the show notes.
• 13:36
  Erin Gray: But that's been really helpful for me because sometimes when you're about to do something really scary, it doesn't freaking feel.
• 13:44
  Erin Gray: Oh, just go do the thing Right.
• 13:47
  Erin Gray: It's like we need to calm our nervous system in the process.
• 13:53
  Carmen Tuleta: One of the other tools that I like to use for myself and I've used it with my kids ever since they were little is I used a different version with my kids, but box breathing, yes, and it's just so many counts in hold for so many counts out, and then you do like so many repetitions of it.
• 14:14
  Carmen Tuleta: With my kids when they were little I would always say, okay, just breathe, and we would do just a little bit of breathing and that was really good at bringing them present.
• 14:25
  Erin Gray: Yeah, I think a lot of us have been told calm down, right Versus, why don't we take a breath?
• 14:32
  Erin Gray: Or why don't we breathe right now, Right, Calm down to me feels like the energy of like this is an issue.
• 14:38
  Erin Gray: Stop it right now versus breathe.
• 14:41
  Erin Gray: And what, Carmen, you know, is like box breathing.
• 14:44
  Erin Gray: If you're unfamiliar, like you're saying, is like taking in a breath for four seconds and holding it for four seconds and releasing it for four seconds and waiting four seconds until you take another breath.
• 14:54
  Erin Gray: And I mean it can be, you know, whatever the seconds feel good for you.
• 14:58
  Erin Gray: But I think, yeah, I mean we always have a breath.
• 15:01
  Erin Gray: We forget about our breath and a lot of us are breathing from our higher up part of our chest.
• 15:07
  Erin Gray: I don't know where I read this.
• 15:08
  Erin Gray: If I, if I can find it, I'll put it in the show notes.
• 15:10
  Erin Gray: But they talk about the.
• 15:12
  Erin Gray: The higher up is, with your sympathetic, and then the lower part, the reason why they want you to do diaphragm.
• 15:19
  Erin Gray: I'm not going to say this incorrectly Diaphragmatic is diaphragmatic, yeah, Something.
• 15:24
  Erin Gray: Oh, you know what I mean From your diaphragm.
• 15:27
  Erin Gray: You're pushing your diaphragm down is from the parasympathetic right, Because it reaches the vagus nerve and so when you, when you inhale all the way and expand your lungs out, it pushes that diaphragm down and somehow connects to I'm not the physiology person, but it connects to the vagus nerve and it calms you Right.
• 15:46
  Carmen Tuleta: And so when we're in that heightened state of just breathing from our upper chest, we're constantly signaling the sympathetic, the stress state that that we're in so really starting to breathe deeply so that we can One of the other tools that I haven't used a lot, but it's something that I actually um lot, but it's something that I actually started to dive more deeply into because I learned about it being in the Grow your CEO Grow the CEO cohort.
• 16:22
  Carmen Tuleta: Sorry was tapping.
• 16:24
  Carmen Tuleta: Oh yeah, that's a good one and it is a good one.
• 16:28
  Carmen Tuleta: I haven't done a lot of it, but it is definitely something that I will be implementing in the future and I think it is going to be beneficial to so many people, especially when it comes to thought versus action in business in life anywhere.
• 16:45
  Erin Gray: Yeah, and I think what Carmen's saying is the tapping and we've had, I'll put Noel came on, um, and she actually showed us like what tapping it's, uh, uh, emotion freedom technique, and I think sometimes people can get caught up.
• 16:58
  Erin Gray: If you're new to tapping, you know, I would suggest, okay, go work with someone and also, like you're literally just put tapping on different points and meridians in your body, and I used to get really hung up because I wouldn't do it.
• 17:10
  Erin Gray: Like here we go back to perfection, right.
• 17:12
  Erin Gray: I didn't know the words to say so I wouldn't do it.
• 17:16
  Erin Gray: And it wasn't till I started going to an energy person and she was like it doesn't even matter the words, just tap on it because it's going to hit, obviously, those parts in your body, right.
• 17:27
  Erin Gray: And so we're just trying to move energy and release some of this stuff and I think so many of us.
• 17:33
  Erin Gray: It's just natural, right.
• 17:35
  Erin Gray: It's like something happens, like whether you get hit by a car or you're going to go do something new, the stress feels the same in the body, right, and so we tense up and we're like, versus allowing ourselves, giving ourselves the tools to use so that we can, um, relax and then take action from that place.
• 17:59
  Carmen Tuleta: And how does having these tools change things?
• 18:05
  Carmen Tuleta: When we're looking at the spectrum of our business and our life, like being able to move forward more so in your business or in life, that's like so huge.
• 18:19
  Carmen Tuleta: I think about the impact that these tools have on later generations and how how people are going to shift how they do things because of it and how parents are going to shift how they do things because of it, yeah, and how parents are going to parent differently and how business is going to be done differently, and I think it's an amazing thing.
• 18:45
  Carmen Tuleta: That's yeah, it's just so great, yeah.
• 18:51
  Erin Gray: I was going to say I can't imagine having these, not having these tools in business, and I'm like, oh, I actually did.
• 18:56
  Erin Gray: I was a fucking basket case when I was with my dad.
• 19:01
  Carmen Tuleta: Well, and I look back at my life too, Like if I would have had the tools that I have now.
• 19:09
  Carmen Tuleta: How things could have been different.
• 19:12
  Carmen Tuleta: But here's the thing we have the tools we had at the time.
• 19:16
  Carmen Tuleta: We did what we could at the time.
• 19:18
  Carmen Tuleta: So leaving that in the past and just moving forward is the beauty, right, and sitting with the realization that life can be pretty sweet when we have these tools.
• 19:31
  Carmen Tuleta: Yeah.
• 19:32
  Erin Gray: I mean, it's like the cliff notes, or it's like someone you know, like cheating on a test or something.
• 19:39
  Erin Gray: You're just like you've got some stuff that you it's it's available to everyone.
• 19:48
  Erin Gray: The question becomes are you willing to start implementing these tools?
• 19:51
  Erin Gray: Right, so, but having that like I can't you know.
• 19:55
  Erin Gray: So many people, I think, are so quick to be like what is the strategy?
• 19:59
  Erin Gray: What is this that you know?
• 20:00
  Erin Gray: Like we want to know the 3d part of like oh, what's it going to do?
• 20:04
  Erin Gray: Yeah, like, with the head right Versus everything truly is like we can figure it out when we are at a calm, calmer place.
• 20:17
  Carmen Tuleta: You know great are at a calm, calmer place.
• 20:21
  Carmen Tuleta: You know, great, having the tools doesn't mean that things aren't still going to come up in life 100%, it's just having the ability to move through it with a little bit more ease.
• 20:27
  Carmen Tuleta: Yeah.
• 20:29
  Erin Gray: And I think your um is it refractory period is, is shorter.
• 20:33
  Erin Gray: I think that's what I'm like.
• 20:34
  Erin Gray: I remember asking my best, you bounce back right.
• 20:37
  Erin Gray: I remember asking my business coach because she was like this was like what six years ago, four years, five, I don't know.
• 20:42
  Erin Gray: And we were just like dumbfounded because we were like, well then what fucking changes if you're making all this money?
• 20:49
  Erin Gray: Because she was saying she still feels this way and we were all just like, well, we've been sold a bill of goods and we don't want to sign up for this.
• 21:00
  Erin Gray: Like what's the point?
• 21:01
  Erin Gray: And at the time she was like you're just faster at recovering, it just isn't as intense she didn't use these exact words, right, but it's just not as intense in the body and that that is everything you know.
• 21:09
  Erin Gray: Like to not get upset over things.
• 21:12
  Erin Gray: You used to get upset because you know either you have the tools or it's just not a trigger for you anymore because you worked through that.
• 21:20
  Erin Gray: Like that's huge, I mean so, yeah, I think I think having the tools not, and not just having the tools, using, using, using the tools Right, and sometimes I mean another tip that I would give is like get a buddy.
• 21:38
  Erin Gray: You know, carmen and I are Marco, marco Polo and boxer buddies, I mean.
• 21:43
  Erin Gray: But seriously, how often do we?
• 21:45
  Carmen Tuleta: you know just that little couple of text messages or a Marco Polo, and it's like oh yeah, okay, you know, easy to just get back on track, and sometimes we don't even need the other to chime in, it's just putting it out there, right?
• 22:03
  Carmen Tuleta: It's like, oh, I'm just processing out loud, and because we all do it.
• 22:05
  Erin Gray: Yeah Right, yep.
• 22:06
  Erin Gray: Anything else that you want to add that maybe we've forgotten.
• 22:12
  Carmen Tuleta: I was going to say something about.
• 22:14
  Carmen Tuleta: I've I've always heard about anxiety and the biggest cure to which is that uncomfortable feeling.
• 22:22
  Carmen Tuleta: The biggest cure to anxiety is taking action.
• 22:25
  Erin Gray: Yeah, cause anxiety is a way it felt.
• 22:28
  Erin Gray: For me it was like fear of the future, and they say depression is, you know, reminiscing over the past.
• 22:33
  Erin Gray: And for me, for sure, of the future, right, and not, and not really feeling.
• 22:40
  Erin Gray: I mean anxiety, I don't think is an actual emotion, it is a resistance to an emotion, right?
• 22:47
  Erin Gray: So for me, tell me if this is true, for you it's resistance of fear, that's what it is for me.
• 22:51
  Erin Gray: Anxiety For me too.
• 22:53
  Erin Gray: Right, so we're not actually feeling fear.
• 22:56
  Erin Gray: And there's this great, I'll put it in the show notes there's this great Sarah Blondin.
• 23:00
  Erin Gray: Uh, it's like a 10 minute, uh, meditation on insight timer.
• 23:03
  Erin Gray: But number one, she has just this best soft voice.
• 23:07
  Erin Gray: You know, like you, just, you know, when you listen to some meditation teachers and you're just like, oh, this feels amazing.
• 23:13
  Erin Gray: But she has a fear one and she's just, she basically talks you through it for a little bit and then she actually does a meditation and she's like what is your fear trying to tell you, like if you were to imagine it to be a friend, what is it?
• 23:24
  Erin Gray: And and are you listening?
• 23:25
  Erin Gray: And when we can look at fear in that way, versus it's trying to act against us or it's this big scary monster, or you know whatever it is versus.
• 23:35
  Erin Gray: Oh, you know the little like the five or the 10 year old in us like, oh honey, what's going on right now?
• 23:41
  Erin Gray: What do you need?
• 23:41
  Erin Gray: That has helped me of like, welcome it more, like I'm not over here, like, hey, come on.
• 23:55
  Erin Gray: Fear, I love you, but like nor am I.
• 23:56
  Erin Gray: But you know, like it does make it easier, it does make it a little bit more palatable when the fear comes up.
• 24:00
  Carmen Tuleta: A huge book that actually helped me with with my fear, because it's it's a constant thing for me, it's a theme in my life, I think, is feel the fear and do it anyways.
• 24:13
  Carmen Tuleta: Yeah, I think it's by Susan Jeffers and that was a huge and it talks about how we talk, about our talk to ourselves, right, the stories that we tell ourselves.
• 24:25
  Carmen Tuleta: So that was another huge one and it, yeah, again taking action.
• 24:33
  Erin Gray: That is the only way, I mean, unless it's going to kill you, literally kill you that is the only way that I have found to move through the fear.
• 24:40
  Erin Gray: Yep, even if it's a baby step, yeah, and that's where we got to start, right, like, I mean, you do have to start with the baby step, but I know a lot of things feel like they're going to kill us, but like very, very small amount actually, you know, really does like fear is healthy, like having healthy fear.
• 25:02
  Erin Gray: You know the, the kid not paying attention and texting and driving.
• 25:04
  Erin Gray: I'm a little scared of him and I get in a different lane.
• 25:06
  Erin Gray: Like that's healthy relationship with fear, right.
• 25:09
  Erin Gray: But maybe you know, I don't know, when I started the podcast or you know, talking to new people or whatever it is, it's like, oh, that's just something you're not used to doing yet we're going to do that anyways.
• 25:21
  Carmen Tuleta: It's defining what the fear means If it's here to bring you out of your comfort zone versus like life threatening right, it's actually sitting with that and cause nine times out of 10, that fear is because you haven't done it before.
• 25:37
  Erin Gray: Yeah, for sure.
• 25:38
  Erin Gray: Oh, so good, carmen, I love it.
• 25:41
  Erin Gray: Thanks for being here.
• 25:43
  Erin Gray: Oh, this is so fun.
• 25:44
  Erin Gray: So where can people find more about you, learn more about you, connect with you?
• 25:48
  Carmen Tuleta: You can check me out on Instagram at.
• 25:51
  Carmen Tuleta: My handle is Carmen Toledo, and you can check me out on my website.
• 25:56
  Carmen Tuleta: I'm doing some updating over there, so it might be changing a little bit, but yeah, that's the two places you can find me, and I have a Facebook page as well.
• 26:08
  Erin Gray: Okay, I'll put all that in the show notes.
• 26:09
  Erin Gray: Sounds great, okay, as always.
• 26:12
  Erin Gray: Thanks for listening, for watching Until next time.
• 26:14
  Erin Gray: I wanted to let you know if you are wanting to understand more about your own unique human design and use it to make empowered financial decisions, you can enroll in my free four-part video workshop series.
• 26:25
  Erin Gray: This series will help you connect deeply with your intuition, gain more clarity and create a money mindset that truly supports your life.
• 26:33
  Erin Gray: To enroll, you can head over to my website under work with me, and I'll also include the link in the show notes.