Latest / Your Enriched Self / 221. What’s Really Filling Your Life’s Jar?

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221. What’s Really Filling Your Life’s Jar? · Your Enriched Self

• 0:20
  Speaker 1: Hello, my friends from all across the globe, and welcome
• 0:23
  Speaker 1: to your Enriched Self podcast. I am your host, my
• 0:28
  Speaker 1: Lee Noir. I am an emotional wellness and empowerment coach,
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: and what that means is that in order to be
• 0:38
  Speaker 1: the best version of yourself, you need to be emotionally
• 0:41
  Speaker 1: stable and prepared for what life is going to deliver,
• 0:46
  Speaker 1: because it will deliver some things, some things we desire,
• 0:52
  Speaker 1: and a lot of things we don't desire. So having
• 0:56
  Speaker 1: emotional wellness and being empowered to make decisions in your
• 1:01
  Speaker 1: own life are an important life skill and way to live,
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  Speaker 1: and it certainly helps you become more enriched in your life.
• 1:11
  Speaker 1: And so that's what this podcast is all about. I
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  Speaker 1: hope if you're joining for the first time, you plan
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  Speaker 1: to stay, not just for this episode, for many other
• 1:20
  Speaker 1: episodes to come and the many episodes that we have
• 1:23
  Speaker 1: in and on this podcast. So thank you for joining.
• 1:27
  Speaker 1: If this is your first time, I know that you
• 1:29
  Speaker 1: were brought here on purpose, for a purpose, And if
• 1:33
  Speaker 1: you are a repeat listener, listen you've been with me
• 1:36
  Speaker 1: last week, two months ago, the whole four years that
• 1:40
  Speaker 1: we've been podcasting. I want to thank you from the
• 1:42
  Speaker 1: bottom of my heart because without you, without listenership, without engagement,
• 1:47
  Speaker 1: without sharing, liking, and commenting on this podcast, we wouldn't
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  Speaker 1: be here. So thank you from the bottom of my
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  Speaker 1: heart for that level of engagement over the years. Thank you,
• 2:00
  Speaker 1: thank you, thank you. Now, if you know, you know,
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  Speaker 1: one of the things I do on this podcast is
• 2:05
  Speaker 1: I make a deposit into the bank of you, and
• 2:09
  Speaker 1: I do that by way of affirmations. Affirmations are a
• 2:13
  Speaker 1: great way to start your day and to command your morning.
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  Speaker 1: And this week's affirmation is I give myself permission to
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  Speaker 1: imagine freely and dream boldly. I give myself permission to
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: imagine freely and dream boldly. I give myself permission to
• 2:43
  Speaker 1: imagine freely and dream boldly. Now, let's get ready for
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  Speaker 1: this week's episode of the Your Enriched Self podcast. Hey friends,
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  Speaker 1: this week, I want to do a brief exercise with you.
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  Speaker 1: It was a very powerful activity that I did a
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  Speaker 1: few years ago at a summit I held here in Atlanta, Georgia.
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  Speaker 1: It involves you right now to have and put into
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  Speaker 1: practice your creativity and most importantly, your visualization. Because this
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  Speaker 1: activity was done with me demonstrating to the audience the
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  Speaker 1: experience of the life that you're living. I want you
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  Speaker 1: to think about your life and think about the things
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  Speaker 1: that are most important to you, the things that are irreplaceable,
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  Speaker 1: let's say it that way. Your family, your loved ones,
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  Speaker 1: your peace of mind, and the multitude of things that
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  Speaker 1: in your life are irreplaceable. There are things that are
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  Speaker 1: going to occur with us and in our lives that
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  Speaker 1: are going to present major but mostly minor inconveniences, and
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  Speaker 1: a lot of those things are replaceable. But what I
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  Speaker 1: want you to focus on right now are the things
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  Speaker 1: that are irreplaceable. Your relationship with God, your prayer life,
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  Speaker 1: your journaling life, your family life, your time with self life,
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  Speaker 1: which is an important part of my life for sure,
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  Speaker 1: and there are so many other things, but I want
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  Speaker 1: you to spend time with that. The reason why I
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  Speaker 1: want you to be intentional about what those things are
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  Speaker 1: and to name them one by one is that if
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  Speaker 1: you don't become intentional about what those things are that
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  Speaker 1: are irreplaceable, that you will not compromise in your life.
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  Speaker 1: What will happen is those things will be on the
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  Speaker 1: chopping block and they will be easily compromised when you
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  Speaker 1: are faced with a challenge, when you have a decision
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  Speaker 1: to make, be it small or large, those things are
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  Speaker 1: going to be harmed if you don't identify them and
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  Speaker 1: put them in the right space in your life. And
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  Speaker 1: so if I sound a little tough in this moment,
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  Speaker 1: it is because so many people lose sight of what
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  Speaker 1: they are intended to do. They lose sight of the
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  Speaker 1: boundaries they built, and they allow people that they love
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  Speaker 1: and sometimes even strangers to come in and destroy those
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  Speaker 1: boundaries and disrespect those boundaries and compromise. Those things in
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  Speaker 1: your life that are irreplaceable, significantly important, very very meaningful
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  Speaker 1: to what you're doing, and a lot of times tied
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  Speaker 1: to your why. You always hear people say, what's your why?
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  Speaker 1: A lot of those things that are irreplaceable. I do
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  Speaker 1: this because I want that peace of mind. You know,
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  Speaker 1: years ago I used to joke about I fight for peace.
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  Speaker 1: I don't fight for peace anymore. I maintain the piece
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  Speaker 1: that I have. I sustain the piece that I have,
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  Speaker 1: and I do that by prioritizing and recognizing, identifying those
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  Speaker 1: things in my life that are irreplaceable. And I need
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  Speaker 1: for you to do the same today. If you've not
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  Speaker 1: done this exercise, it's important to first do this that's
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  Speaker 1: the first step before we even do the activity to
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  Speaker 1: visual activity that I want to do with you today
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  Speaker 1: is to have that very meaningful bucket of things established,
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  Speaker 1: identified and ready to name them one by one if needed,
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  Speaker 1: because I promise you will be put in a situation
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  Speaker 1: and you will need to know and be very intentional
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  Speaker 1: about those items, those things. So once you've created your
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  Speaker 1: list and you can name them one by one, and
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  Speaker 1: you know that, you know that, you know that this
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  Speaker 1: and these are your things, these are your quality. Things
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  Speaker 1: can't be replaced. Many will try, but they can't replace them. Okay,
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  Speaker 1: Now I want you to think about those things that
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  Speaker 1: are important significant, maybe something like your job, the fact
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  Speaker 1: that you have a car. It's reliable, you can get
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  Speaker 1: to work. You might even love your car. You might
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  Speaker 1: have a nice luxury car. You may not have a
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  Speaker 1: luxury car. You may just have a car in general.
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  Speaker 1: But you understand the value of this item. You understand
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  Speaker 1: the value of a home. You understand the value of
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  Speaker 1: a job. You understand the value of your savings account
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  Speaker 1: important but replaceable. You can find another job, you can
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  Speaker 1: get another car. How many of us have had the
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  Speaker 1: same car since we started buying cars. I haven't I've
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  Speaker 1: got another car? Why because the other car broke down.
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  Speaker 1: So these things are important, but they're not things that
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  Speaker 1: cannot be replaced. They can certainly be replaced. Then there
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  Speaker 1: are things in your life that are kind of the
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  Speaker 1: frivolous things, the luxury things. Taking a vacation every year.
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  Speaker 1: Not everybody gets to do it. It's a fun thing
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  Speaker 1: to do, it's a great thing to do. Some people
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  Speaker 1: get two or three a year. Huh, that's amazing, right,
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  Speaker 1: you know, having the best and the latest and greatest,
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  Speaker 1: you know, fragrances or handbags or phones or whatever. Again,
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  Speaker 1: these are things you don't need that. They're more of
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  Speaker 1: your wants. You don't need to with these items. Have
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  Speaker 1: a long drawn out process to determine if you're going
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  Speaker 1: to buy, typically with a car, with a home, with
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  Speaker 1: things of that nature. With making a selection for the
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  Speaker 1: job that you are going to have for the next ten,
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  Speaker 1: fifteen years, however long you decide to be at that
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  Speaker 1: place of employment. Those are big decision points, right, They're replaceable,
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  Speaker 1: but they're big decision points. You know, you have to
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  Speaker 1: spend this kind of money to get the car, or
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  Speaker 1: put this down payment to get the home, or you know,
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  Speaker 1: drive this distance to get the job or take this salary.
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  Speaker 1: So those things have that kind of quantifier with them.
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  Speaker 1: They're not necessarily huge on quality, and sometimes they are,
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  Speaker 1: but they're quantifiable things. These things I'm talking about are
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  Speaker 1: kind of like your wants, right, They're frivolous. You don't
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  Speaker 1: need to research so much. Maybe some people do. Some
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  Speaker 1: people are kind of like that, but you don't have
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  Speaker 1: to research so much to learn which fragrance to buy
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  Speaker 1: or what coffee to get because they're advertising it on
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  Speaker 1: TV and you're just gonna go to Starbucks or wherever
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  Speaker 1: you go and get your coffee and just get a
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  Speaker 1: holiday drink or whatever. You don't need to make a
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  Speaker 1: big decision on that. Those are just things you want
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  Speaker 1: to have, things you want to experience, the vacations. And
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  Speaker 1: now you have these kind of three buckets, the irreplaceable things,
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  Speaker 1: the things that are significant but replaceable, and then those
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  Speaker 1: frivolous wants that you have that you're you know, you
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  Speaker 1: pursue them and you get them, and you have them
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  Speaker 1: and you feel good about them, but in a few
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  Speaker 1: weeks you forget about them. We've all done it, we
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  Speaker 1: all do it. But I want you to be clear
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  Speaker 1: about these three kind of quadrants of the swim lanes
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  Speaker 1: of your life, if you will. That is essential to
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  Speaker 1: understanding your boundaries and what's priority in your life, so
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  Speaker 1: that when you are at a decision point that sometimes
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  Speaker 1: requires you to drop a lot of things, you will
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  Speaker 1: be able to make that decision point with less stress
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  Speaker 1: because you know what's important. You don't have to compromise
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  Speaker 1: what's important because you have a clear line of sight
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  Speaker 1: of what those things are. So the exercise that I
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  Speaker 1: want you to do, the virtual exercise that I did
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  Speaker 1: with this audience a few years ago at a summit,
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  Speaker 1: was I had them or I showed them a large
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  Speaker 1: clear jar. And that large clear jar had three come
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  Speaker 1: opponents to it. It had a large rock, it had pebbles,
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  Speaker 1: and it had sand. And the activity was to understand
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  Speaker 1: which way you are to fill up your jar? What
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  Speaker 1: is the right way, if you will, to fill up
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  Speaker 1: your jar. And I want you to think of this
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  Speaker 1: jar as large clear jar is your jar of life.
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  Speaker 1: And the big rocks they signify those items that are irreplaceable,
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  Speaker 1: the things that are priority number one every day, not
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  Speaker 1: some days, every day of your life. The reason why
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  Speaker 1: you do what you do. The reason why you have
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  Speaker 1: the drive that you do is because of that big rock.
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  Speaker 1: The things that are part of that big rock, and
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  Speaker 1: the pebbles represent those things that are replaceable but important.
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  Speaker 1: They need to be part of your life. You need
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  Speaker 1: a job, you need a home or a place to stay,
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  Speaker 1: and you need a way to move around in your life.
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  Speaker 1: You need to have finances. Those are important things. They're replaceable,
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  Speaker 1: but they're important. And finally, the frivolous things I say
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  Speaker 1: frivolous things, the day to day things, the things you want,
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  Speaker 1: let's just say the things you want more than the
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  Speaker 1: things you need. That represents the sand. So you have
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  Speaker 1: your big rocks, you have your pebbles, which are your
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  Speaker 1: irreplaceable things but important things. And then you have your
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  Speaker 1: wants that you pursue and you get they're not major,
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  Speaker 1: and that is the sand. So how do you fill
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  Speaker 1: up your jar of life? What comes first? I want
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  Speaker 1: you to think about it this large clear jar, and
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  Speaker 1: I want you to fill that jar with sand. And
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  Speaker 1: when you fill it up with sand, now try to
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  Speaker 1: put your big rock in. It is probably likely difficult
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  Speaker 1: for you to get your big rock in that jar,
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  Speaker 1: or your big rocks, because Let's say your family is
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  Speaker 1: a rock, and your piece is a rock, and you
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  Speaker 1: know those your relationship with God is a rock, and
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  Speaker 1: you have these big three big rocks, and all the
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  Speaker 1: rocks we started talking about at the top of the call,
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  Speaker 1: at the top of the podcast. You have these rocks identified,
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  Speaker 1: and you start trying to put these rocks on top
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  Speaker 1: of the sand, and you get a couple of them
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  Speaker 1: in there comfortably, but a few of them can't make it.
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  Speaker 1: They don't make it in to the jar. And that's
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  Speaker 1: not good because we said that these were priority number one.
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  Speaker 1: We said these were the things that were irreplaceable. But
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  Speaker 1: now we're at a point where we've already compromised our life.
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  Speaker 1: So we decided to throw into pebbles, and the pebbles
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  Speaker 1: make it in there, but we don't have room for
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  Speaker 1: the big rocks. So are we living the life that
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  Speaker 1: we say is important to us? The things that we
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  Speaker 1: say we've prioritized. So I think you get it. You
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  Speaker 1: understand that this assignment was designed for us to prioritize
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  Speaker 1: our lives, to be intentional about knowing what is important,
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  Speaker 1: what is significant, what is driving you to be and
• 15:52
  Speaker 1: to do and to live the way you are. It's
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  Speaker 1: typically your family, it's your friends, it's friendships, it's connects.
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  Speaker 1: These are the things that are irreplaceable. These are the
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  Speaker 1: things that matter at the end of the day. That's
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  Speaker 1: what you're thinking about. At least that's what you should be.
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  Speaker 1: Some people are thinking about other things. But those are
• 16:13
  Speaker 1: the things that are important, most important. So in the
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  Speaker 1: exercise this large clear jar, I had two large clear jars.
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  Speaker 1: One I indicated or showcased putting the sand down first,
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  Speaker 1: or the frivolous things and even the pebbles right, putting
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  Speaker 1: them down first, as opposed to putting the big rocks.
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  Speaker 1: And then now with the other jar, I showcased big
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  Speaker 1: clear jar putting the big rocks in, and man it worked.
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  Speaker 1: All those big rocks fit into that jar. Every single
• 16:47
  Speaker 1: one of those big rocks fit into that jar. Everything
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  Speaker 1: had its place, There was no compromise. The priorities were
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  Speaker 1: prioritizedt and when it was time to put the pebbles in,
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  Speaker 1: they fell into place. They were important, They worked, they
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  Speaker 1: got in there, and when it was time to pour
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  Speaker 1: the sand in, a lot of the sand went in there,
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  Speaker 1: but not all of it. It filled in some of
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  Speaker 1: the blanks. It made things a little brighter, a little better.
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  Speaker 1: It added a little cherry on top, but not all
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  Speaker 1: of it fit into the jar, because all of it
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  Speaker 1: doesn't have to. It is not a priority to have
• 17:35
  Speaker 1: the latest phone, but some of us pursue it. The
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  Speaker 1: intent of this exercise, as you can imagine, is to
• 17:46
  Speaker 1: put things in the proper place, prioritize the things that
• 17:51
  Speaker 1: are significant and important, and be prepared that life is
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  Speaker 1: going to life and when it does and you have
• 17:58
  Speaker 1: to make these major decisions and minor decisions, your priorities
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  Speaker 1: are prioritized and nothing is going to slip through the cracks.
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  Speaker 1: Everything will fit into the mole that you're setting up
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  Speaker 1: exactly as designed. If we practice this, If you practice this,
• 18:21
  Speaker 1: you are going to minimize the number of times where
• 18:26
  Speaker 1: people destroy and disregard your boundaries. You are going to
• 18:34
  Speaker 1: find more peace in your life. You're going to design
• 18:38
  Speaker 1: the life you want by prioritizing the things that are important.
• 18:46
  Speaker 1: I hope you enjoyed this week's episode of the Urine
• 18:48
  Speaker 1: Ritsub podcast. And the only way I'm gonna know this
• 18:51
  Speaker 1: is if you leave me some feedback. Feedback is a
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  Speaker 1: gift and it is free to give, and I would
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  Speaker 1: like to hear from you. I would like to know
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  Speaker 1: what resonated with you regarding this week's episode. Now here's
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  Speaker 1: listen to this podcast. Follow the stars. When you get there,
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  Speaker 1: leave a five star rating. But in all seriousness, when
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  Speaker 1: feeding you mind, body, and spirit. I also want you
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  Speaker 1: to check out the show notes. In the show notes,
• 20:14
  Speaker 1: we have the Affirmation of the week, the Quote of
• 20:16
  Speaker 1: the week, and there you can also find my Amazon shop.
• 20:21
  Speaker 1: The Your Rich Self shop has two items right now,
• 20:25
  Speaker 1: a journal which is the Show Up Everyday Journal, as
• 20:29
  Speaker 1: well as the Show Up Everyday Notebook. So check those
• 20:33
  Speaker 1: out in my Amazon shops. And finally, take what you
• 20:37
  Speaker 1: can from this episode and do what you must in
• 20:40
  Speaker 1: the next one hundred and sixty eight hours so that
• 20:43
  Speaker 1: you can become more of your enriched self until we
• 20:49
  Speaker 1: meet again.