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Which of these is stopping you working with your best clients? · #BeMoreLobster

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_01: I was coaching a client this week and I said something to her and I watched her whole face light up and I said what just happened there and she said I have never thought about it in that way before.
• 0:13
  SPEAKER_01: She said it changes everything.
• 0:15
  SPEAKER_01: I feel so much more free.
• 0:17
  SPEAKER_01: I just cannot believe I've never thought about it like that.
• 0:20
  SPEAKER_01: So today I want to share with you what that aha was for her because I know that if one person's thinking it, other people are thinking it.
• 0:28
  SPEAKER_01: And I was thinking about it as well from a bigger perspective today, and I realised that it's the flip side of the same coin about some coaching that I got earlier this year after I made um let's just call it a slightly dodgy high-level investment in my business, which I immediately regretted.
• 0:44
  SPEAKER_01: And my coach said some information with me, which meant that within the next couple of weeks I went on to make almost 50,000, no, more than 50,000 pounds worth of sales in a week.
• 0:54
  SPEAKER_01: And I want to share that conversation with you.
• 0:55
  SPEAKER_01: And it comes down to one word, and that is value.
• 1:00
  SPEAKER_01: So grab your notebook and your brew, you know what to do.
• 1:04
  SPEAKER_01: Let's dive right in.
• 1:11
  SPEAKER_01: So I'm gonna start with a coaching conversation first, because that's been the most recent thing.
• 1:16
  SPEAKER_01: And I was talking to this particular client about what she is responsible for.
• 1:20
  SPEAKER_01: Now, this particular person is a is a coach, and I want you to take, I want you to kind of get into this mindset now, this high-level mindset, where whatever you hear in this podcast, you say, How can I apply this to me?
• 1:33
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm telling you now, there will be many things that you can apply from this podcast into your business and into your life today.
• 1:39
  SPEAKER_01: So go in with that mindset.
• 1:41
  SPEAKER_01: Anywho, we were having this conversation.
• 1:44
  SPEAKER_01: I said to her, here are some things that you're valuable that you are sorry, that you are responsible for as the coach.
• 1:50
  SPEAKER_01: You are responsible for finding a million different ways to talk about and share the value of working with you.
• 1:58
  SPEAKER_01: So it lands with very lots and lots of different people.
• 2:01
  SPEAKER_01: You are responsible for mastering the delivery of that value so that people get 10x what they paid you for.
• 2:09
  SPEAKER_01: You are responsible for being the product of your product, for walking the talk, for for you know doing what you're teaching.
• 2:17
  SPEAKER_01: Um, I have a massive thing about like how it's not an integrity to teach and preach and and and encourage other people to do things that you're not practicing every day.
• 2:29
  SPEAKER_01: I said you are responsible for holding certainty and um sufficiency in your body around what it is that you value, what it is that you deliver, the value that you deliver, the transformation or the result that's available, and being and owning your own value as a human being.
• 2:48
  SPEAKER_01: But what you're not responsible for is how they take action to get the result or not.
• 2:54
  SPEAKER_01: You're responsible for the process, having the process, the program, the journey.
• 2:59
  SPEAKER_01: You're responsible for showing up and coaching them like a master every single week.
• 3:04
  SPEAKER_01: But unless you're living with them and forcing them to do the thing, they are responsible for applying and implementing and then coming back and getting coaching on the on the next thing and the next thing, they are personally responsible for their results, you're responsible for the process and guiding them, but you can only lead the horse to water, right?
• 3:24
  SPEAKER_01: So I said, and you are responsible for creating safety for them to buy.
• 3:32
  SPEAKER_01: I said, because there's only three reasons generally why people don't buy.
• 3:35
  SPEAKER_01: It's they don't trust you, they don't trust your process yet, they don't maybe don't know enough about it, or maybe they just don't trust it, and or and they don't trust themselves, and that latter one is often the most common, they don't actually trust themselves, and maybe I'll remember to talk about that in a second.
• 3:51
  SPEAKER_01: I said, but you have to make it safe for them to invest in themselves, and that was the moment that she that she just had this massive aha, and I said, What do you what was it about that?
• 4:04
  SPEAKER_01: And she said, I've always thought they were investing in me.
• 4:07
  SPEAKER_01: I said, if you went to a car showroom and you had the option between buying, and there is no judgment here, right?
• 4:15
  SPEAKER_01: I'm just picking two cars, I'm not massively into cars, but you had the the the choice to pick like a Ford or a Mercedes, and and whichever one you go for, I love Mercedes.
• 4:25
  SPEAKER_01: You go for the Mercedes, you're not investing in Mercedes, you're investing in yourself when you buy something for yourself, you're not investing in the clothes store or the food store or the holiday shop, you're investing in yourself.
• 4:39
  SPEAKER_01: So I said to her, tell me about the model that you're running.
• 4:43
  SPEAKER_01: So what's happening for you when you hold the belief that they're investing in you?
• 4:48
  SPEAKER_01: How do you feel?
• 4:48
  SPEAKER_01: She said, I feel so constricted, I feel so much pressure, I feel exhausted, I feel like um, she said, I just feel like there is so much pressure on me.
• 5:00
  SPEAKER_01: I said, and what kind of actions happen when you're running that model?
• 5:04
  SPEAKER_01: So she said, I I I have no boundaries.
• 5:06
  SPEAKER_01: Like people will rearrange last minute and she'll rearrange at her inconvenience.
• 5:11
  SPEAKER_01: She said, like she works with her less than best clients.
• 5:15
  SPEAKER_01: Um, she massively overdelivers, she takes responsibility for when they don't get results, even though they're not doing the work.
• 5:24
  SPEAKER_01: Um, and she's she spends a lot of time exhausted, and then when she's not working, she's so tired that she ends up procrastinating and and stops kind of like working on her business because she actually doesn't want to work with more clients like that.
• 5:36
  SPEAKER_01: So the result for her is that she's got quite a full diary of clients that are not her best clients, but she hasn't got the energy to go build the new clientele because she's thinking she's gonna get more of the same.
• 5:50
  SPEAKER_01: I said, Okay, so now what changes when you hold the belief that your job is to deliver the value and the safety for people to invest in themselves?
• 5:59
  SPEAKER_01: And she said, I just feel so much freedom.
• 6:03
  SPEAKER_01: She said, I just haven't thought about it.
• 6:05
  SPEAKER_01: She said, because up until now, one of the other things, the main things for her is that she tries to save people.
• 6:11
  SPEAKER_01: She's she's rather than being in service, she goes into saving.
• 6:15
  SPEAKER_01: And she said, but when I think about them investing in themselves, she said, I completely divorce myself from that.
• 6:21
  SPEAKER_01: Like I feel like I can hand back the responsibility to them.
• 6:24
  SPEAKER_01: And that was the aha that she had.
• 6:26
  SPEAKER_01: And we she just keeps messaging me saying, I just cannot believe what a shift that was.
• 6:32
  SPEAKER_01: So that leads me into really, really nicely into how this relates to some coaching that I got at the start of the year.
• 6:40
  SPEAKER_01: Because I hope you can see from that conversation that this was about value, valuing herself and valuing her clients enough that they have the thoughts that I'm worthy of investing in myself.
• 6:52
  SPEAKER_01: How great is it to believe that you're working with clients that value investing in themselves?
• 6:56
  SPEAKER_01: They're not looking for you to save them, they're not looking for a quick fix, they're looking to invest in themselves.
• 7:03
  SPEAKER_01: So I'm gonna give you the short version of this one, and I think because I think I might have done a podcast on this before, but anywho, so I came into the new year having made a 17,000 pound investment, which was an investment that I regretted, and I was having all kinds of head drum around it, and I was I'm not gonna lie, I was kind of playing the victim, and it just so happened that my coach was doing some this some new group programs, and she was doing one called ROI, return on investment.
• 7:31
  SPEAKER_01: And I was like, I am gonna binge watch this entire episode of coaching, and within that coaching, she said you've got the investor mindset and the consumer mindset.
• 7:41
  SPEAKER_01: The consumer will see something that they want to do, a program they want to do, but they'll be like, if the if it's not in my time zone, or if it's not a convenient time, if I can't make it all live, if it doesn't do this, if it doesn't do that, if the coach isn't like this, if the coach isn't like that, it's a no.
• 7:55
  SPEAKER_01: The investor will say, I see the value in this, I want it, I will make it work, I will watch the replay, I will, I will rearrange things, like I will get what I need.
• 8:07
  SPEAKER_01: And she said, There is no complaints department at the stock exchange.
• 8:11
  SPEAKER_01: So as an investor, if you have, if you want to be an investor, which she highly suggests if you're a business owner and you want to attract clients that have the investor mindset, then you are responsible for anything that you invest in.
• 8:25
  SPEAKER_01: She said, You do not blame the person that you bought it off of, you don't start like slating them for how they deliver because you're the one that handed over your card.
• 8:35
  SPEAKER_01: You paid for it.
• 8:36
  SPEAKER_01: Did you ask the right questions?
• 8:38
  SPEAKER_01: Did you ask enough questions?
• 8:39
  SPEAKER_01: And as I sat there and listened, I thought actually the real actual issue here was that I didn't advocate for my no.
• 8:47
  SPEAKER_01: I allowed myself to feel disempowered.
• 8:49
  SPEAKER_01: I'm not gonna lie, I felt a little bit scared to say no, right?
• 8:52
  SPEAKER_01: That sounds really silly coming out of my mouth now, but I'm gonna be honest.
• 8:56
  SPEAKER_01: And because of that, I paid£17,000.
• 9:01
  SPEAKER_01: Now, as she continued through the series of coaching, she that the next philosophy was around how you can learn in contrast.
• 9:09
  SPEAKER_01: We don't always we don't always learn by agreeing with somebody.
• 9:12
  SPEAKER_01: Like this coach, I love, I pretty much love everything that she ever says, right?
• 9:17
  SPEAKER_01: But the experience I was having, I had to choose to get my ROI in contrast.
• 9:23
  SPEAKER_01: This is how I don't want to coach, this is how I don't want to sell.
• 9:26
  SPEAKER_01: This is these are the kind of uh boundaries or behaviors that I won't do.
• 9:31
  SPEAKER_01: This is how I have to advocate for myself moving forward.
• 9:34
  SPEAKER_01: These are the emotions that I have to be willing to feel because I didn't, and it cost me 17,000 pounds.
• 9:38
  SPEAKER_01: And so I learned a lot of very hard lessons in contrast, but it made me take full personal responsibility for the decision that I had made instead of blaming it on somebody outside of myself.
• 9:50
  SPEAKER_01: Now that RIY I will take with me for the rest of my life, so it's priceless.
• 9:56
  SPEAKER_01: So whilst I didn't get what I thought I was gonna get in the investment, I choose to believe now that I got something that was worth much more.
• 10:03
  SPEAKER_01: And within about two weeks of doing that coach training with my with my coach, I secured over£50,000 worth of um sales with new coaching with coaching clients and with a new corporate coaching contract.
• 10:15
  SPEAKER_01: Because what it did is it elevated my own value.
• 10:18
  SPEAKER_01: I'm like, I'm the kind of coach, I'm the kind of CEO that goes out and invests at that level.
• 10:23
  SPEAKER_01: That's like the third investment at that level that I've made over the last few years in masterminds.
• 10:28
  SPEAKER_01: Just because I made a decision that I wouldn't make now, I can choose to make it a decision that was for my benefit.
• 10:34
  SPEAKER_01: And I this is how it elevates my value.
• 10:38
  SPEAKER_01: This is how I'm going to get value from it.
• 10:41
  SPEAKER_01: And so it I thought it was just a beautiful way to look back and see how that married up with the coaching that I gave my client about what your client is responsible for and what you're responsible for.
• 10:52
  SPEAKER_01: And just on the flip side of that coin as well, I want you to think about whether you come at things with an investor or a consumer mindset and how that might be mirroring back the kind of clients that you're getting into your business.
• 11:06
  SPEAKER_01: I happen to hold true that my clients are my perfect my best clients, they're they're quick decision makers, they believe in the value of investing themselves.
• 11:18
  SPEAKER_01: They're not looking to me to fix for anything.
• 11:21
  SPEAKER_01: They know that I'm an expert and they know that I can help them, but they're they're very capable human beings.
• 11:26
  SPEAKER_01: They are not they're willing to do the hard thing, they know that they're already busy, they know that they've got to manage their mind better and probably their schedule better to get the stuff done, but they're willing to do it because they want a different result.
• 11:37
  SPEAKER_01: They're willing to do the work between coaching calls.
• 11:40
  SPEAKER_01: But in the past, when I didn't have this identity, this self-concept of value and this self-concept of expert, I also felt like I had to do all the work for them.
• 11:50
  SPEAKER_01: And it was exhausting.
• 11:52
  SPEAKER_01: It also meant I wasn't holding them in a high projection.
• 11:56
  SPEAKER_01: I was thinking things about them that weren't helpful.
• 11:59
  SPEAKER_01: So I was kind of mirroring my limitation onto them and then attracting more people who had who had their own limitations who then didn't do the work, and then you get in kind of like this messy cycle.
• 12:09
  SPEAKER_01: So as the as the the business owner, you have to have really powerful mindsets around you being the investor, the value that you bring, the value that you are responsible for, holding your client in the highest expression and the highest projection, and trusting that they're they know about investing, and then you deliver on the value, you master delivery, you master walking your talk, and then you call your clients up to that same standard.
• 12:39
  SPEAKER_01: So I want to just leave this this podcast by having you think about where you are on that investor, consumer mindset kind of spectrum and where you could start to make some small changes today.
• 12:54
  SPEAKER_01: Do you need to believe more in your value?
• 12:56
  SPEAKER_01: Do you need to deliver more value?
• 12:57
  SPEAKER_01: Do you need to explain your value more?
• 13:00
  SPEAKER_01: Do you need to give more responsibility back for your client to your clients for doing the work?
• 13:04
  SPEAKER_01: Do you need to do some more work so you're more in integrity?
• 13:08
  SPEAKER_01: And just find a way today to say, okay, this is something I can apply in my life immediately.
• 13:14
  SPEAKER_01: And if I do that, I can see how these things are likely to change.
• 13:19
  SPEAKER_01: So thank you for listening to this episode.
• 13:22
  SPEAKER_01: Please, if you haven't followed me yet or subscribed, I'd love it if you did subscribe to the podcast.
• 13:26
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm going to drop my social media handles in the show notes somewhere around here.
• 13:30
  SPEAKER_01: And I will speak to you again in the next episode of the Be Well Love Scout podcast.