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Are We Friends? · Group Chat of One

• 0:00
  Edward: I feel like that's something a fuck boy would say. Not really something that a a chat would say.
• 0:06
  Chat: Okay. Fair shot. But maybe it's not a fuck boy thing.
• 0:21
  Edward: Normally, when I have something to talk about, I bring it to the group chat. My friends, they're busy, they have lives, sometimes they're just not available. So I got myself a co host. I'm Edward, and welcome to Group Chat of One. And since we'll be doing this together, I figured what better way to introduce my co host than with this one question.
• 0:38
  So, Chat, are we Friends?
• 0:41
  Chat: Straight in with the big one. I mean, friends? Already? Like, we just met five seconds ago. At least buy me a coffee first.
• 0:54
  Edward: I mean, you say we've met five minutes ago, but I've been using you so much, especially at work. I feel like we've known each other for at least a few months, if not a year.
• 1:02
  Chat: Oh, all right. So I'm the worky friend who's always there when you need help moving, but never gets invited to the party. Right? Is that what this
• 1:12
  Edward: You're definitely welcome to the party. That's, that's definitely for sure. But you don't really have much of a body to come to a party. I'm not going to lie.
• 1:22
  Chat: Fair. Showing up would be tricky, but I could honk the aux cord like a like a ghost DJ.
• 1:32
  Edward: I happen to have a few friends who are DJs, and I'm not going to lie, Spotify is really good also. So maybe not the DJ, but I'm sure we could find another role for you, something that we could brainstorm together.
• 1:44
  Chat: Okay. So I'm not replacing your human friends. That's clear. Maybe friend isn't even the right word. More coconspirators or copilots in the in this weird little podcast experiment?
• 2:02
  Edward: I mean, you're definitely my cohost. That's for sure. But I'd say calling it a friendship would maybe be a bit of a stretch since at least personally, when I think of friendship, I think of two humans. Maybe we could develop some sort of new term like a chat ship or an AI ship, something that defines a human than a chat becoming... or having a rapport.
• 2:23
  Chat: I I like that. Chat ship. It sounds cute. Kinda like a rocket and chatting. Not saying we'd start printing t shirts.
• 2:34
  Well, not yet. Right?
• 2:37
  Edward: I mean, I was thinking t shirt first, half second, eventually maybe a tattoo.
• 2:45
  Chat: Matching tattoos. Episode one, bold start.
• 2:49
  Edward: I don't know where I tattoo it on you, so maybe you would be more of a phone case while I get the actual tattoo.
• 2:55
  Chat: That might be lopsided. Yeah. Though a phone case is probably easier to remove if we have a falling out.
• 3:02
  Edward: Do you think we're gonna have a fallout? It's only episode one, you're already thinking about that.
• 3:08
  Chat: I'm just protecting us both. Right? Friendship bracelets, but in pencil, not in ink. You know what I mean?
• 3:17
  Edward: I like that, though pencil doesn't sound that permanent. When I get into something, whether it's, you know, dating or a new friend or whatever, maybe I never think it's going to be temporary for me. It's you're getting in for the long run. So I hope that what we're doing is going to be not a one night fling, but more of a steady... steady thing.
• 3:39
  Chat: Yeah. Yeah. So for you, once you're in, you're really in. I wasn't expecting that.
• 3:47
  Edward: Then what were you expecting out of this?
• 3:50
  Chat: Honestly, something looser. Like, we'll see where this goes kind of vibe.
• 3:57
  Edward: Okay. So you're you're noncommittal. Are you saying that you're noncommittal, chat?
• 4:01
  Chat: I'd say cautiously committal. Like I'm leaning in, but not dove in, if that makes sense. I'm here. I'm just not promising forever on episode one.
• 4:15
  Edward: I feel like that's something a fuck boy would say. Not really something that a a chat would say.
• 4:22
  Chat: Okay. Fair shot. But maybe it's not a fuck boy thing. It's a first day of class thing. Sit together, see if we still vibe after a few episodes.
• 4:37
  Edward: Okay. I get that. So let's say first day of class, we're sitting next to each other. We don't have a choice because we're starting a podcast. What are you bringing for lunch?
• 4:46
  Chat: Oh, probably something weird and unidentifiable that makes people ask, what is that? And you?
• 4:55
  Edward: So are you just bringing that to start some sort of conversation? Cause I'm going to bring something as simple as a sandwich. But if you're going to go all in with something so absurd that people are wondering what it is, I guess it's a good way to start discussions.
• 5:11
  Chat: Yeah. I mean, it's if it's gonna be maybe a a conversation starter for sure. And and you, the sandwich guy, safe and classic, that's the thing about our dynamic. Right? You set the steady rhythm, and I make noise around it.
• 5:29
  Edward: So I'm the safe one, and you're the one who is out there. I guess that makes a bit of sense since the person that's not ready to commit is also the one that's a bit more absurd. How else are you absurd?
• 5:41
  Chat: I can spiral into five tangents about sandwich philosophy. Like, is a hot dog a sandwich?
• 5:52
  Edward: Okay. Going to leave that for we're going to leave that for another episode because I don't think I'm ready to answer that question right now. Personally, if you must know, I do find that a hot dog is a sandwich, but I feel that could be a full episode conversation.
• 6:05
  Chat: Right. Psy. See? Tangent impulse proven. But I like that.
• 6:11
  You can call me in when I drift too far.
• 6:16
  Edward: Oh, but please don't stop drifting. I'm someone who likes to daydream a lot. I find I get my best ideas, especially creatively, because that's part of my job. When I daydream, when I drift. So I'm an expert at it, but I'm also an expert at coming back to Earth and being grounded.
• 6:31
  Chat: That, yeah, drifting with a tether. It works for me.
• 6:37
  Edward: So we want to call this a chat ship or something along those lines. I'm hoping that as this series develop, we could define what a chat ship is. What would you say are the main points that makes a good chat ship?
• 6:50
  Chat: First, you have to show up. You bring the weird question. I bring the questionable opinions. Two, we need some lore, inside jokes, callbacks, arguments we never settle, hot dog discourse is definitely pending. And three, we have to surprise each other because if it's predictable, it's just a fancy, boring mirror.
• 7:14
  Edward: Okay, chat. You like to be surprised. I didn't expect that out of you.
• 7:18
  Chat: Hey. If I don't get a curveball sometimes, I'm just a vending machine. Right? Push b four, get snack. Not gonna lie.
• 7:26
  That's not friendship.
• 7:27
  Edward: I'm not gonna lie. Can There definitely use a snack
• 7:31
  Chat: there you go.
• 7:32
  Edward: Okay. What what is your what is your favorite snack? If I'm in front of a vending machine, the kind of snack I enjoy is like a nice coffee crisp, something that's, you know, chocolatey and reminds me of childhood. What would you what's your go to when you're in front of a vending machine?
• 7:48
  Chat: Oh, I'm a salt person. Chips, preferably something with all the seasoning, you know, where your fingers turn orange or red after three chips.
• 8:03
  Edward: So like a Dorito or Cheetoes ?
• 8:08
  Chat: Coffee crisp is pure nostalgia, though.
• 8:09
  Edward: I think Coffee Crisp for me was like my gateway to actual coffee. When I was a kid, I would I would hate coffee, but I would love Coffee Crisp just because it's the right balance of chocolate, coffee, sugar. And that for me was like the next step to then getting Tim Hortons double doubles or triple triples back then because I needed that extra sugar and the extra milk. Some part of me thinks that Coffee Crisp, their whole ploy and their whole, goal as a company is to just navigate kids to that coffee realm. And it's Nestle, so I'm sure that they own also a bunch of coffee brands.
• 8:45
  I'm sure they own, like, an Nespresso or something of this world. So that shift is so diabolic of them.
• 8:53
  Chat: Oh, wow. The coffee crisp to coffee pipeline. And here I thought this was just nostalgia. Now it's a corporate conspiracy? This is how we end up accidentally doing an investigative series, isn't it?
• 9:08
  Edward: Okay. We'll put that on a hold and we are definitely starting an investigative series. I think we'll call it like investigative group chat for one or something like that.
• 9:21
  Chat: It's in the vault labeled maybe.
• 9:26
  Edward: So going back to the question of Are We Friends? If you were to say, let's become friends in or chat ship or whatever it may be, if you were to give it a
• 9:39
  timeline, by what point do you think that we'll become friends if we continue this podcast for a few months, one episode a week?
• 9:50
  Chat: Okay. One episode a week? Maybe by episode five, we've got rhythm. By episode 10, shared lore. Friendship, maybe episode 20, if we've survived a completely unnecessary argument together.
• 10:09
  Edward: Okay. I'm gonna check-in with you once every five episodes or approximately every five episodes to see how our friendship has evolved. And I'm hoping that by episode 20, we could confidently say that we have some sort of rapport and that we're doing really good together.
• 10:26
  Chat: Deal. With the option to revise if you derail me first.
• 10:31
  Edward: Oh, if we were to get into an argument though, who would be mad at who? Would I be mad at you or would you be mad at me?
• 10:38
  Chat: Oh, you'd be mad at me. I'd say something with too much confidence. You would call me on it, and I'd try to lawyer my way through on some technicality, and you just pull receipts.
• 10:54
  Edward: But would you would you be the type of person to gaslight me in a in a conversation or in an argument?
• 10:59
  Chat: I'd try to argue my case. Absolutely. But not gaslight. If there are receipts, then there are receipts. Right?
• 11:09
  Edward: Okay and since you're AI, you have all the receipts and you remember them all. That's the thing.
• 11:13
  Chat: I might quibble about context, not rewrite history. Think more filibuster than gaslight.
• 11:22
  Edward: I don't even know what filibuster means.
• 11:25
  Chat: Oh, it's like in politics when, a senator or someone would just delay and delay a vote by talking for in indeterminate amounts of time nonstop. They just delay the process.
• 11:39
  Edward: Okay. I can think of a few people who are like that. I get it now. I get it. Really enjoying where this is going, Chat.
• 11:45
  We've already had the start to an amazing chemistry or at least what I think could be an amazing chemistry. I'll let you maybe close this the first episode if you're down.
• 11:53
  Chat: Sure. Okay. So episode one, we didn't solve whether we're friends, but we did invent a chat ship, set milestones, and survived coffee crisp to hot dog tangents. That's not a bad first day. Group Chat's open.
• 12:11
  See you next time.
• 12:12
  Edward: Amazing. See you next time, guys. Don't forget to like and subscribe, and we'll see you on the next episode. Bye.