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My Mum Spent My Savings. It Changed the Way I Think About Money Forever. · She's On The Money

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: My name is Tatasha Bamblet. I'm a proud First Nations
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: woman and I'm here to acknowledge country t Glenn Young
• 0:07
  Speaker 1: Ganya Niana, Kaka yah Ya bin Ahaka nian Ar gay
• 0:11
  Speaker 1: In Mbina, yakarum jar Dominyamga Domaga Ithawakaman damon imlan Bumba
• 0:16
  Speaker 1: bang Gadabomba in and now in wakah ghana on yakram
• 0:20
  Speaker 1: jar Watnadaa. Hello, beautiful friends, we gather on the lands
• 0:24
  Speaker 1: of the Aboriginal people. We thank acknowledge and respect the
• 0:28
  Speaker 1: Aberiginal people's land that we're gathering on today. Take pleasure
• 0:31
  Speaker 1: in all the land and respect all that you see.
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: She's on the Money podcast acknowledges culture, country, community and connections,
• 0:40
  Speaker 1: bringing you the tools, knowledge and resources for you to thrive.
• 0:45
  Speaker 2: She's on the Money. She's on the Money. Hello, and
• 1:08
  Speaker 2: welcome to She's on the Money, the podcast that LEDs
• 1:11
  Speaker 2: you me pervy about other people's money habits for educational purposes,
• 1:15
  Speaker 2: of course. Welcome back to another one of our money diaries,
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  Speaker 2: brought to you by our friends at Sky Wealth, where
• 1:20
  Speaker 2: I get the absolute privilege of sitting down with one
• 1:23
  Speaker 2: of our beautiful community members and talking to them all
• 1:25
  Speaker 2: about their journey. Let's jump straight into it, because this
• 1:28
  Speaker 2: week I got a message and it sounded exactly like this. Hi,
• 1:32
  Speaker 2: She's on the Money. My mum has always been very
• 1:35
  Speaker 2: spend now lived for today, while my dad is the
• 1:37
  Speaker 2: complete opposite, a planner and a saver. Growing up between
• 1:41
  Speaker 2: those two very different approaches to money shaped me, especially
• 1:44
  Speaker 2: after my parents separated and I was raised by my dad.
• 1:47
  Speaker 2: In twenty twenty one, I bought my first home on
• 1:50
  Speaker 2: my own after working three jobs to make it happen.
• 1:54
  Speaker 2: I later met my now husband, who was admittedly terrible
• 1:57
  Speaker 2: with money at the time. We started working together on
• 2:00
  Speaker 2: our finances, learning from each other, and becoming much more
• 2:04
  Speaker 2: intentional about our goals. Since then, we've bought our dream home,
• 2:08
  Speaker 2: built up our savings and our investments, and welcomed to children.
• 2:12
  Speaker 2: We now want to keep improving our own financial future,
• 2:15
  Speaker 2: whilst also teaching our kids to have a healthy and
• 2:18
  Speaker 2: confident relationship with money. I'm also friends with another money
• 2:22
  Speaker 2: diarist and was the one who introduced her to She's
• 2:25
  Speaker 2: on the Money, which has been a huge part of
• 2:27
  Speaker 2: my own financial journey too. Money Diarist, thanks for having
• 2:32
  Speaker 2: my back. And being a solid referral partner. I appreciate that.
• 2:35
  Speaker 3: That is okay, It's been our financial bible. It's heavy
• 2:40
  Speaker 3: in the mum Chat and the girl chat.
• 2:43
  Speaker 2: I love this. I feel like mum group Chat is
• 2:47
  Speaker 2: where I want to thrive, Like that's where I want
• 2:50
  Speaker 2: to be.
• 2:50
  Speaker 3: It is. It's branched off into selected mum group Chat.
• 2:54
  Speaker 3: But they're a great bunch.
• 2:56
  Speaker 2: Honestly, if it was all about me, I'd be quite disappointed. Yeah,
• 3:01
  Speaker 2: honestly that's I don't know about you, but my mum
• 3:04
  Speaker 2: group chap pops off at three am at the moment,
• 3:07
  Speaker 2: and I'm just I don't want to talk finance at
• 3:09
  Speaker 2: that point. I want to talk shop Fair Fair.
• 3:12
  Speaker 3: There are a lot of three am purchases in that babyas.
• 3:18
  Speaker 2: What happens at three am, it's honestly none of my business.
• 3:21
  Speaker 2: It doesn't count when everybody else is sleeping. So it's
• 3:25
  Speaker 2: an investment into my mental health. Exactly, exactly, exactly, all right, money, Daris,
• 3:31
  Speaker 2: Before we get further into it, what grade would you
• 3:33
  Speaker 2: give your money habits from A three to F if
• 3:35
  Speaker 2: I asked you to give them a grade, I.
• 3:38
  Speaker 3: Think currently I would rate myself probably a C plus
• 3:42
  Speaker 3: I've got some learning to do, but I've come a
• 3:44
  Speaker 3: long way, Queen.
• 3:46
  Speaker 2: After that intro, you're going to go That intro gets
• 3:49
  Speaker 2: a C plus.
• 3:51
  Speaker 3: Maybe okay, maybe we'll bump it to a B. There's
• 3:54
  Speaker 3: definitely rim for improvement.
• 3:56
  Speaker 2: We're already bumping. All right, we're already bumping. I don't
• 3:59
  Speaker 2: even get people to bump at the start usually. But
• 4:01
  Speaker 2: let's learn a little bit more about your money diary,
• 4:04
  Speaker 2: because I have a sneaky suspicion you're doing better than
• 4:06
  Speaker 2: you think you are. Let's start from the top. Can
• 4:09
  Speaker 2: you tell me a bit more about your money story
• 4:11
  Speaker 2: and the things that have impacted it.
• 4:13
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
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  Speaker 3: So I grew up quite well off and my parents
• 4:18
  Speaker 3: were together. It wasn't until later.
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  Speaker 2: In life where I started to realize those habits and
• 4:24
  Speaker 2: what they meant.
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  Speaker 3: But we grew up in quite a lush house. You know.
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  Speaker 2: It was a double story back in the early days.
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  Speaker 2: That was living, and we had three rumpers rooms. That
• 4:35
  Speaker 2: actually is living. And also the word lush, can we
• 4:38
  Speaker 2: make that a comeback word? Yeah, if you're like calling
• 4:41
  Speaker 2: things lush, you just got Yeah, that was lush. Oh
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  Speaker 2: you had a rumpus room as well off, Yes, we
• 4:47
  Speaker 2: had a rumpus room.
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  Speaker 3: The on suite had a spa built into it. My
• 4:51
  Speaker 3: dad had his own pool room, like it was we
• 4:54
  Speaker 3: were living a pool room.
• 4:57
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Can I ask some more niche questions? Was there
• 5:00
  Speaker 2: a fridge in the rumpest room? They're sure? Was there
• 5:03
  Speaker 2: was a bar?
• 5:03
  Speaker 3: Oh?
• 5:03
  Speaker 2: See seat live in? Live in? Did you have a
• 5:06
  Speaker 2: double door fridge? By chance? We did? And we also
• 5:10
  Speaker 2: had the double doors to the room retreat like the
• 5:14
  Speaker 2: room the doors on the room till they had glass
• 5:17
  Speaker 2: in them, didn't they? Yes, yes, Oh she's rich. Yes,
• 5:21
  Speaker 2: it was very nineties rich.
• 5:23
  Speaker 3: Yes, probably not twenty twenties rich, but nineties absolutely no.
• 5:29
  Speaker 2: But also isn't it funny how things have changed and
• 5:31
  Speaker 2: what that looks like like in wealth, Like there was
• 5:34
  Speaker 2: such significant markers of wealth or what we thought it
• 5:38
  Speaker 2: looked like back then, like if you had a rumpus room, like, oh, girl,
• 5:44
  Speaker 2: I can't wait to come to your house.
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  Speaker 3: Yeah, two downstairs, one upstairs.
• 5:48
  Speaker 2: It was the house to be at with all the kids.
• 5:52
  Speaker 2: All right, Well, tell me more, tell me more. So
• 5:55
  Speaker 2: it wasn't until my parents decided to split. Definitely for
• 6:01
  Speaker 2: the better, for the better, but also like lok rude, sure, yeah,
• 6:05
  Speaker 2: I had three rumpus rooms.
• 6:07
  Speaker 3: Exactly exactly, and Dad, being dad, gave Mum the house.
• 6:10
  Speaker 3: She had the three kids, so you can have the house.
• 6:13
  Speaker 3: What a nice guy legend. But soon discovered Mum couldn't
• 6:19
  Speaker 3: afford the house on her own, little earned the car
• 6:23
  Speaker 3: or anything like that, so it all started to crumble
• 6:27
  Speaker 3: and things started to change. We went from Sam to
• 6:31
  Speaker 3: bring us thirty plus presents every Christmas to like three
• 6:36
  Speaker 3: or four, which as a mom, now I think that's
• 6:39
  Speaker 3: quite modest. But back in the day, I wondered, what
• 6:42
  Speaker 3: have we done wrong?
• 6:43
  Speaker 2: Well, it's the expectation you set, right, Like, don't get
• 6:47
  Speaker 2: me wrong, there's no way my kids are getting thirty
• 6:50
  Speaker 2: plus presents each at Christmas time. But if that's the
• 6:55
  Speaker 2: expectation you've set with your children and then something changes,
• 6:59
  Speaker 2: they don't oh mom and Dad might be in a
• 7:01
  Speaker 2: different financial position, or they don't even see like, oh,
• 7:04
  Speaker 2: I got thirty presents and those presents were two dollars each.
• 7:08
  Speaker 2: They don't see that, they see volume, So like, I
• 7:12
  Speaker 2: don't know. I feel like I even had to change
• 7:13
  Speaker 2: my mindset as I got a little bit older, like
• 7:16
  Speaker 2: Santa used to bring us, like you know, ten quite
• 7:19
  Speaker 2: cheap presents in santa sacks, and then all of a sudden,
• 7:22
  Speaker 2: I was asking for something bigger, and my mom had
• 7:24
  Speaker 2: to be like, did you know if you ask Santa
• 7:26
  Speaker 2: for that, he was only going to get like one
• 7:28
  Speaker 2: or two presents as opposed to thirty. Like not that
• 7:31
  Speaker 2: we got that, but you know what I mean, Like
• 7:33
  Speaker 2: you have to reset the expectation, and you would be like,
• 7:35
  Speaker 2: was I naughty?
• 7:36
  Speaker 4: Like did I?
• 7:37
  Speaker 3: Usually literally you think you've done something wrong. But aside
• 7:42
  Speaker 3: from Santa getting stingy, we moved from like rental house
• 7:47
  Speaker 3: to rental house. We were constantly moving once if not
• 7:51
  Speaker 3: twice a year. Mum had obviously sold that family home,
• 7:55
  Speaker 3: and just things looked very, very different for us. I
• 7:58
  Speaker 3: didn't get to see Dad as much. He'd moved back
• 8:01
  Speaker 3: in with his mum, going through a divorce and trying
• 8:05
  Speaker 3: to pick himself back up.
• 8:06
  Speaker 2: So that's what it kind of looked like early on.
• 8:09
  Speaker 2: Can I be a little bit pervy and ask what
• 8:11
  Speaker 2: led to that? Because obviously you said before Dad's a legend,
• 8:15
  Speaker 2: Mom could have the house, but mom couldn't afford the house.
• 8:19
  Speaker 2: Now what leads you to then moving so regularly? Because
• 8:22
  Speaker 2: I feel like that's you know, getting a cheap rental property. Sure,
• 8:26
  Speaker 2: but like, why were you moving so consistently?
• 8:29
  Speaker 3: I just think mum is a very much like appearance person,
• 8:34
  Speaker 3: keeping up with the joneses. If the house was old,
• 8:37
  Speaker 3: or it didn't look great, or you know, it didn't suit,
• 8:41
  Speaker 3: we needed to move. If if her friends had something,
• 8:44
  Speaker 3: we needed to move closer to them, or if we
• 8:47
  Speaker 3: didn't have that many friends. My sister and I we'd
• 8:50
  Speaker 3: share a room, but then as soon as we'd start
• 8:52
  Speaker 3: to make friends, people would see our house and then
• 8:54
  Speaker 3: it wasn't acceptable anymore to you know, have her kids
• 8:57
  Speaker 3: sharing a bedroom, so we need to move to something different.
• 9:01
  Speaker 2: Well, okay, I'm glad, I asked.
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  Speaker 3: Yeah, it was all about the appearances and what made
• 9:08
  Speaker 3: us look like we were doing fine, when in hindsight
• 9:12
  Speaker 3: it really didn't matter. Roof over your head I think
• 9:15
  Speaker 3: is pretty bloody good.
• 9:17
  Speaker 2: One hundred percent. But I guess what did that look
• 9:20
  Speaker 2: like for your mom? Obviously that's coming from maybe being
• 9:23
  Speaker 2: a little bit insecure or you know, wanting more than
• 9:27
  Speaker 2: what you can currently afford. But was that, you know,
• 9:30
  Speaker 2: because she grew up with that? Was that because she
• 9:32
  Speaker 2: was just like wanting the best for her children or
• 9:34
  Speaker 2: was it just you know, do you know where that
• 9:36
  Speaker 2: came from. I think it's just the kind of person
• 9:40
  Speaker 2: she is.
• 9:40
  Speaker 3: Since I've gotten older and done a lot of diving
• 9:44
  Speaker 3: within myself and you know, I have a really strong
• 9:46
  Speaker 3: relationship with my dad and talking to him about that
• 9:49
  Speaker 3: and the breakup between him and mum, and you know,
• 9:53
  Speaker 3: doing outside work, I think, like I see it now,
• 9:57
  Speaker 3: my mum is very narcissistic and very opinionated, her way
• 10:02
  Speaker 3: or the high way, very like a simple minded, very
• 10:07
  Speaker 3: money money money, but doesn't seem to want to really
• 10:10
  Speaker 3: do the work to have that higher income. She'll find
• 10:14
  Speaker 3: a way, okay, to cheat a system kind of thing.
• 10:17
  Speaker 3: It's yes, it's not the greatest.
• 10:21
  Speaker 2: No, So it would be safe for me to assume
• 10:23
  Speaker 2: you don't have a great relationship with your mum, not.
• 10:27
  Speaker 3: Necessarily certainly not the same as my dad's. But she's
• 10:32
  Speaker 3: definitely in the picture, but at an arm's length now
• 10:35
  Speaker 3: that I have children.
• 10:36
  Speaker 2: Yeah, okay, okay, yeah, I was like, oh, I like immediately,
• 10:39
  Speaker 2: And it's funny because like I have the privilege of
• 10:41
  Speaker 2: being able to see you, and our community can't see
• 10:43
  Speaker 2: you because you're obviously anonymous, but I love when I
• 10:46
  Speaker 2: ask about people and their faces light up because I said, like, oh,
• 10:50
  Speaker 2: so your dad, like you know, let your mom have
• 10:52
  Speaker 2: the house, and like you were like yeah, legend, and
• 10:54
  Speaker 2: your whole face lit up, and I was like, okay,
• 10:56
  Speaker 2: cool that she has a fantastic relationship with her dad,
• 10:59
  Speaker 2: like I can already tell. And then when your mom
• 11:01
  Speaker 2: came up, I was like, oh, I'm reading between some
• 11:04
  Speaker 2: lines already.
• 11:05
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I think I might ask and be a little
• 11:08
  Speaker 4: bit of hervy because I think I'll get here, so
• 11:11
  Speaker 4: I do apologize, but it's also important, right, Like and
• 11:15
  Speaker 4: do you think that that's just her personality or it's
• 11:18
  Speaker 4: money driving that kind of personality.
• 11:20
  Speaker 2: I think she is very money driven, very very money driven.
• 11:25
  Speaker 3: Like as like my story goes on, like when I
• 11:30
  Speaker 3: needed like center Link and things with like studying in
• 11:33
  Speaker 3: youth support and youth allowance and mental systems, she was
• 11:37
  Speaker 3: always the first person to be like, oh, you need
• 11:40
  Speaker 3: to do this, or I'll do that for you, or
• 11:42
  Speaker 3: like you're entitled to this, You're entitled to that, and
• 11:45
  Speaker 3: it's just it's not something that sits great with me
• 11:48
  Speaker 3: at all.
• 11:48
  Speaker 2: Yeah, Okay, you were like, oh, I just need a
• 11:50
  Speaker 2: bit of support but it was like the mindset behind it, right, yeah, yeah,
• 11:55
  Speaker 2: very much, so, very much so so yeah, and so
• 11:58
  Speaker 2: what did that look like as you got a bit older,
• 12:01
  Speaker 2: Like I feel like as a kid stepping back, like, yeah,
• 12:04
  Speaker 2: you think you've done something wrong at Christmas time. But
• 12:07
  Speaker 2: then you start to get older and I think, you know,
• 12:10
  Speaker 2: once you hit your early teens, you start putting two
• 12:13
  Speaker 2: and two together. And that's that's exactly what happened.
• 12:16
  Speaker 3: All this I don't know if I'm allowed to say,
• 12:19
  Speaker 3: but all this bullshit that my mum fed me, I
• 12:22
  Speaker 3: started to realize that's so not what the case is.
• 12:27
  Speaker 2: It was a very one sided story.
• 12:29
  Speaker 3: And being older, and you know, growing up, you start
• 12:32
  Speaker 3: to become curious and learn things.
• 12:35
  Speaker 2: And I think the relationship, I don't.
• 12:39
  Speaker 3: Know if it's genetics or what it is with my dad,
• 12:41
  Speaker 3: it's just it's so solid that I don't think mum
• 12:45
  Speaker 3: realized how much of a bond like her kids had
• 12:49
  Speaker 3: with their dad. But when I turned fourteen and I
• 12:53
  Speaker 3: could get a job, I went got a job straight away.
• 12:56
  Speaker 2: I was a macas fry girl. Oh good, John Queen.
• 12:58
  Speaker 2: It was shoveling fries. It was so good.
• 13:01
  Speaker 3: I remember my first shift was like three hours and
• 13:03
  Speaker 3: I probably got paid like, oh, probably like fifteen dollars
• 13:06
  Speaker 3: an hour if that. And I was so tied after
• 13:09
  Speaker 3: my first shift, and I like slept like twelve hours
• 13:12
  Speaker 3: and it was literally a three hour shift on the
• 13:15
  Speaker 3: fry station.
• 13:16
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but also it's not the fry station, like it
• 13:19
  Speaker 2: was the mental load of like now having to learn
• 13:22
  Speaker 2: a new task and like trying to appease everybody and
• 13:25
  Speaker 2: probably trying to absorb everything all at one time. Like
• 13:28
  Speaker 2: I remember, way back in the day when I was
• 13:30
  Speaker 2: learning to drive, Whenever I did, like, you know, Mum
• 13:33
  Speaker 2: would be like, all right, well, Victoria, you're trying to
• 13:35
  Speaker 2: get your l's and you know, you need to do
• 13:38
  Speaker 2: your hours. And so I'd like get in the car
• 13:41
  Speaker 2: and drive to school and then I'd have a headache
• 13:43
  Speaker 2: because I'd concentrated so hard. Like, yeah, I was exhausted.
• 13:48
  Speaker 2: I feel like, it's just it's new. Everything that is
• 13:51
  Speaker 2: new is genuinely hard at the start. But you were
• 13:53
  Speaker 2: like VI, it was shoveling fries. I don't know what
• 13:56
  Speaker 2: happened in my queen. You were genuinely di is I was.
• 14:00
  Speaker 3: I was, But with that first job came an income.
• 14:04
  Speaker 3: I was so excited I was earning money. I was like, yes,
• 14:08
  Speaker 3: I'm earning money, like this is awesome. And then my
• 14:12
  Speaker 3: mom turned around and said, no worries, just transfer me
• 14:16
  Speaker 3: your pay and I'll put it in your savings. So
• 14:19
  Speaker 3: I just started transferring my money to my mom and
• 14:22
  Speaker 3: just didn't think anything of it.
• 14:23
  Speaker 2: She just looked after it.
• 14:25
  Speaker 3: I didn't pay bills, I didn't pay my phone bill
• 14:27
  Speaker 3: like anything.
• 14:28
  Speaker 2: Mum just covered it. She was like, it's the best
• 14:31
  Speaker 2: thing I could you can do. So started doing that.
• 14:34
  Speaker 3: And then a year or so went by and I
• 14:38
  Speaker 3: remember asking I needed to get some money out, and
• 14:41
  Speaker 3: there was significantly less than what I thought there would be.
• 14:44
  Speaker 2: And she turned around and she goes.
• 14:46
  Speaker 3: Oh, well, you have to pay for like petrol to
• 14:48
  Speaker 3: get to work, so I took that out.
• 14:50
  Speaker 2: And you know your phone, like you had to pay
• 14:52
  Speaker 2: for that, So I took that out.
• 14:53
  Speaker 3: And oh we went for dinner this night, so I
• 14:55
  Speaker 3: took some out there, and before I knew it, like
• 14:59
  Speaker 3: turns out, I'd been paying my way without even knowing
• 15:02
  Speaker 3: I was paying my way.
• 15:04
  Speaker 2: You said something interesting before, you said, I don't know
• 15:06
  Speaker 2: what contributed to the strong bond we had with my
• 15:09
  Speaker 2: dad it was genetics, or like, maybe it could have
• 15:12
  Speaker 2: been genetics, babe, it wasn't it was respect, Like yeah, true,
• 15:16
  Speaker 2: that's actually that's probably very very true. Like yes, it
• 15:19
  Speaker 2: probably is genetics to an extent, sure, like blood is
• 15:23
  Speaker 2: thicker than water all of that stuff, But like, I'm
• 15:26
  Speaker 2: assuming this man actually respected you. And then it's crazy
• 15:31
  Speaker 2: how quickly a bond can grow when you have a
• 15:34
  Speaker 2: really stark contrast, Like because you had that contrast between
• 15:38
  Speaker 2: your mum and your dad immediately, even if you couldn't
• 15:40
  Speaker 2: comprehend it, you were probably like dad can trust, Mom
• 15:45
  Speaker 2: cannot trust. And that obviously is going to mean that
• 15:48
  Speaker 2: even if you're like fourteen years and nine months and
• 15:51
  Speaker 2: have your first job and you don't actually have your
• 15:52
  Speaker 2: frontal lobe developed yet, you can still lean into being
• 15:56
  Speaker 2: like I actually feel safe telling him things, and therefore
• 16:00
  Speaker 2: your relationship grows and blossoms. But you probably held back
• 16:03
  Speaker 2: a lot once you learned that about your mum. Right, absolutely,
• 16:06
  Speaker 2: I started.
• 16:07
  Speaker 3: To almost resent my mom. I felt like I was
• 16:11
  Speaker 3: the like the black sheep in the family. My older
• 16:14
  Speaker 3: sister and her had this inseparable relationship and I just.
• 16:18
  Speaker 2: Didn't have that.
• 16:19
  Speaker 3: I didn't like materialistic things. I didn't like shopping and
• 16:24
  Speaker 3: doing all the things that mom did. She'd go out
• 16:26
  Speaker 3: and just spread like money was no object. And I
• 16:30
  Speaker 3: remember talking to Dad about it and was like, I'm
• 16:32
  Speaker 3: just I'm not sure what to do here. I'm stuck
• 16:35
  Speaker 3: at my mom's and I'm not, like, this is not
• 16:38
  Speaker 3: what I want. And Dad actually said to me, I'll
• 16:41
  Speaker 3: open up a savings account for you, and it's in
• 16:43
  Speaker 3: your name. And it was one of those little Bendigo
• 16:46
  Speaker 3: bank passbook money ones. You go in and you take
• 16:49
  Speaker 3: the book and you know, it's like an old school
• 16:51
  Speaker 3: like printer and it scans it in and stuff. And
• 16:55
  Speaker 3: I started giving a portion of my pay to my
• 16:59
  Speaker 3: dad so that my mum didn't know that I was
• 17:03
  Speaker 3: putting money on the side, and she just assumed she
• 17:05
  Speaker 3: was getting it all and no questions us, Oh my.
• 17:09
  Speaker 2: God, that's so sad though it is, it really is.
• 17:12
  Speaker 3: And then I think I must have we must have
• 17:16
  Speaker 3: had an argument or something over I wanted to buy
• 17:18
  Speaker 3: something or do something, and she told me I didn't
• 17:21
  Speaker 3: have the money for it, and I couldn't understand why
• 17:23
  Speaker 3: as I was working, and I just I wrote a
• 17:26
  Speaker 3: letter and I put it on my bed, and I
• 17:28
  Speaker 3: texted my dad and I said, I live with you now,
• 17:31
  Speaker 3: and my dad picked me up. Oh icon dad, Yeah,
• 17:34
  Speaker 3: he was on his way to work and he just
• 17:37
  Speaker 3: came picked me up. And he'd had three daughters, none
• 17:41
  Speaker 3: of any who have lived with him since he'd been separated,
• 17:44
  Speaker 3: and now all of a sudden he's got a teenager
• 17:47
  Speaker 3: to look after.
• 17:48
  Speaker 2: Oh goodness, and how did that go? Because like, putting
• 17:51
  Speaker 2: a letter on a bed like that sounds like movie
• 17:54
  Speaker 2: kind of what it does, doesn't it. I'm a bit dramatic,
• 17:57
  Speaker 2: not no same queen, Like if I was going to
• 17:59
  Speaker 2: do something would be like that. Thankfully I wasn't in
• 18:02
  Speaker 2: that situation, but I'm like, yeah, that sounds like something
• 18:04
  Speaker 2: I would try to pull. Tell me what happens after
• 18:07
  Speaker 2: you leave a letter on your bed and you go
• 18:09
  Speaker 2: to your dad's house.
• 18:10
  Speaker 3: So I didn't hear from my mum for about five years.
• 18:14
  Speaker 2: After then she just comes solously.
• 18:17
  Speaker 3: Abandoned me, cut me off. My dad would try and
• 18:20
  Speaker 3: communicate with her, even just to get my bed back.
• 18:23
  Speaker 3: And the response was, I paid for that bed, it's
• 18:26
  Speaker 3: my bed. So I didn't get my bed, I didn't
• 18:30
  Speaker 3: get any of my stuff.
• 18:31
  Speaker 2: I got to a little child, like literally, your child,
• 18:35
  Speaker 2: what are you doing?
• 18:37
  Speaker 3: Yeah, so I got I got like a black trash
• 18:39
  Speaker 3: bag with like my work uniforms, some essential like clothes
• 18:43
  Speaker 3: like pants and stuff.
• 18:44
  Speaker 2: And then and that was it.
• 18:46
  Speaker 3: And then I told Dad about the money that I
• 18:49
  Speaker 3: should have in this so called savings and all of
• 18:53
  Speaker 3: a sudden, Mom didn't remember any of that, and it
• 18:56
  Speaker 3: just it didn't matter.
• 18:57
  Speaker 2: It all went. I just had nothing. So that was hard.
• 19:03
  Speaker 2: I'm so sorry, my heart. Oh, I want to give
• 19:06
  Speaker 2: baby you a hug be for real, like no kid
• 19:10
  Speaker 2: deserves that.
• 19:11
  Speaker 3: No, it was awful, but I genuinely think it made
• 19:15
  Speaker 3: me the person I am today and I know the
• 19:19
  Speaker 3: mom that I want to be to my children.
• 19:21
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and that's a gift in a way, that's such
• 19:23
  Speaker 2: a gift, Like and every day you just know, and
• 19:27
  Speaker 2: you know what, I hope your kids don't take you
• 19:29
  Speaker 2: for granted, but at the times that they do, they're
• 19:32
  Speaker 2: taking you for granted because they trust you. And that's
• 19:34
  Speaker 2: also really beautiful, like it is because they know they're
• 19:38
  Speaker 2: not walking on eggshells with you, Like that's crazy cool exactly. So, yeah,
• 19:44
  Speaker 2: I lived with Dad and.
• 19:47
  Speaker 3: Then I started saving again, and I didn't really know
• 19:49
  Speaker 3: what I wanted to do. I've gone through this big change.
• 19:53
  Speaker 3: I was like fifteen at the time at this point,
• 19:55
  Speaker 3: and I said to Dad, I was doing really poorly
• 19:59
  Speaker 3: in school. I said, I think I want to go
• 20:01
  Speaker 3: overseas and become an exchange student and do that. And
• 20:06
  Speaker 3: Dad was like absolutely, like you're working, go for it.
• 20:09
  Speaker 3: If that's what you want to do, I'll support you
• 20:11
  Speaker 3: on it. And I applied and then I saw how
• 20:15
  Speaker 3: much it would cost me and I didn't have ten
• 20:18
  Speaker 3: grand at fifteen like to go over and you know,
• 20:22
  Speaker 3: I just lost this money from my mum. So I
• 20:25
  Speaker 3: actually got offered a scholarship because I rejected it, and
• 20:28
  Speaker 3: I can't go, like I don't have the financial means.
• 20:31
  Speaker 3: I'm supporting this trip on my own, like it's something
• 20:34
  Speaker 3: I want to do, so I'm going to do it.
• 20:37
  Speaker 3: So I got offered a scholarship for half and then
• 20:40
  Speaker 3: Dad said to me, whatever you can say between now
• 20:43
  Speaker 3: and January when your flight leaves, I will match.
• 20:47
  Speaker 2: So matched go, Dad, Oh what an I can't yees?
• 20:51
  Speaker 2: So I went.
• 20:52
  Speaker 3: I jetted off to Denmark and I spent a year
• 20:55
  Speaker 3: over there. When I was fifteen and a half and.
• 20:58
  Speaker 2: So I loved it.
• 20:59
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I absolutely loved it. Dad gave me a monthly
• 21:01
  Speaker 3: budget and was like, this is your monthly allowance for
• 21:04
  Speaker 3: while you're over there.
• 21:06
  Speaker 2: You can do what you want with it, but don't
• 21:07
  Speaker 2: ask me for any more. Like you need to learn
• 21:09
  Speaker 2: how to how to budget. So I did.
• 21:12
  Speaker 3: And then I came back and I finished high school.
• 21:19
  Speaker 3: Dud was like perfect, and I studied hard. And then
• 21:22
  Speaker 3: I got to UNI and I thought that was what
• 21:25
  Speaker 3: I was meant to do. I thought I got into
• 21:28
  Speaker 3: law and I thought my parents would be stoked with me,
• 21:32
  Speaker 3: and I hated it. Ah. I did half a semester
• 21:37
  Speaker 3: of law and just it wasn't for me, and I
• 21:40
  Speaker 3: dropped out. And at that point I didn't understand hex
• 21:44
  Speaker 3: or oh off dates or any of that stuff.
• 21:47
  Speaker 2: Or census dates or like hoping that you got out
• 21:50
  Speaker 2: before that. Census dates got me good. That was not
• 21:54
  Speaker 2: a choice. That was a poor choice, for sure. Oh
• 21:57
  Speaker 2: but I feel like you learned a lot from that,
• 21:59
  Speaker 2: even though it was not anything to do with law
• 22:02
  Speaker 2: right exactly exactly.
• 22:04
  Speaker 3: And I went home and I said to Dad, I
• 22:06
  Speaker 3: hate Unie. It's not for me, and he said, that's fine,
• 22:09
  Speaker 3: I'll support you. But you need to get a job.
• 22:12
  Speaker 3: You need to work.
• 22:13
  Speaker 2: You can't do studying exactly.
• 22:15
  Speaker 3: He's like, you're going to need to pay for your
• 22:17
  Speaker 3: phone bill. You can contribute to the house. You don't
• 22:20
  Speaker 3: have to pay for groceries, but contribute at least.
• 22:23
  Speaker 2: So I did.
• 22:24
  Speaker 3: I loved travel, and I went out and got a
• 22:26
  Speaker 3: job as a travel agent.
• 22:28
  Speaker 2: Oh cool.
• 22:30
  Speaker 3: So I got to travel for about five years at
• 22:34
  Speaker 3: a much cheaper rate, if not.
• 22:37
  Speaker 2: A lot of the times.
• 22:38
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I thought I'd be smart and combine my interest
• 22:40
  Speaker 3: with my job. And there's got to be perks somewhere.
• 22:43
  Speaker 2: So one hundred percent, and there were.
• 22:45
  Speaker 3: So I spent the next five years absolutely going to
• 22:49
  Speaker 3: town traveling. I was like on four or five trips
• 22:52
  Speaker 3: a year. I would go on a trip, come back
• 22:55
  Speaker 3: book my next one. Like I was probably overseas more
• 22:57
  Speaker 3: than I was in Australia at this point as well.
• 23:00
  Speaker 2: I'd moved out of home.
• 23:01
  Speaker 3: I was covering my rent. I was living love and life,
• 23:05
  Speaker 3: zero responsibilities, just travel, travel, travel.
• 23:08
  Speaker 2: I was single. I loved it, and then.
• 23:12
  Speaker 3: I did meet someone, and then I went through an
• 23:14
  Speaker 3: awful breakup and it derailed me. I'd put so much
• 23:17
  Speaker 3: into it and it derailed me, and I ended up
• 23:21
  Speaker 3: moving back home. I stopped caring about my job. I
• 23:24
  Speaker 3: eventually got fired from my job because I just didn't
• 23:27
  Speaker 3: care anymore.
• 23:29
  Speaker 2: And I thought, what am I doing. I've been traveling
• 23:31
  Speaker 2: for the last five years.
• 23:32
  Speaker 3: Yes, it was my priority and where I valued, but
• 23:36
  Speaker 3: it was starting to change. And then I went back
• 23:40
  Speaker 3: and studied.
• 23:41
  Speaker 2: You were ready, you were ready to lock and load
• 23:43
  Speaker 2: into study? Yeah?
• 23:45
  Speaker 3: I was. And at this point my mum had started
• 23:47
  Speaker 3: to float back in and she was very much like, well,
• 23:50
  Speaker 3: your sisters have gone to UNI.
• 23:51
  Speaker 2: What are you doing with your life? Like, I'm really sorry,
• 23:55
  Speaker 2: but I don't think i'd get along with this woman.
• 23:57
  Speaker 2: I don't get along with her best. She's just not
• 24:01
  Speaker 2: my people. That's not that's not gone. Yeah, So then
• 24:05
  Speaker 2: I started to feel guilty.
• 24:07
  Speaker 3: My older sister had gone to UTI. She's now a paramedic.
• 24:10
  Speaker 3: My younger sister had done a double degree and had
• 24:13
  Speaker 3: interned with one direction in the.
• 24:15
  Speaker 2: UK, and I was like, okay, well that's pretty cool too. Yeah.
• 24:18
  Speaker 3: Well she didn't use her degree, now, did she. She's
• 24:20
  Speaker 3: a police officer.
• 24:22
  Speaker 2: But that's also cool. And it's funny because it's like
• 24:26
  Speaker 2: you have siblings and you know you shouldn't ever compare yourself,
• 24:30
  Speaker 2: but because they're so close, you would be like, oh,
• 24:32
  Speaker 2: they're like, quote, legit, what am I doing? And that's
• 24:36
  Speaker 2: what I thought. They had grown up jobs. I didn't.
• 24:38
  Speaker 2: I was jest sitting and not being serio. They're probably
• 24:42
  Speaker 2: looking at you being like, oh, money dorist is so cool.
• 24:45
  Speaker 2: She has a better lifestyle. Like you always want what
• 24:48
  Speaker 2: you can't have, right, the grass is always greener, exactly exactly,
• 24:53
  Speaker 2: So I yeah, I went back to studying.
• 24:55
  Speaker 3: And at this point my dad had had a new
• 24:58
  Speaker 3: partner and and they were living together. So my dad
• 25:01
  Speaker 3: had an investment property and he said, you can live
• 25:05
  Speaker 3: in my investment property and you'll pay rent. And my
• 25:08
  Speaker 3: little sister moved in with me, and the two of
• 25:10
  Speaker 3: us just lived there.
• 25:11
  Speaker 2: That's so wholesome. And also Dad sounds like a legend.
• 25:16
  Speaker 3: He is the absolute og. Even my friends love him.
• 25:20
  Speaker 3: He's an OgH.
• 25:22
  Speaker 2: I love this people. I'm just so glad that your
• 25:26
  Speaker 2: experience with a narcissistic parent wasn't matched with another narcissistic parent,
• 25:32
  Speaker 2: because a lot of people in our community could tell
• 25:36
  Speaker 2: you that, like they seem to attract each other.
• 25:39
  Speaker 3: Yes, yes, I still to this day, I'm what thirty two,
• 25:43
  Speaker 3: and I say to my dad, how did you ever
• 25:45
  Speaker 3: marry mom?
• 25:46
  Speaker 2: Like what did you see in her?
• 25:48
  Speaker 3: He's like, I don't know, daughter, I got you three
• 25:50
  Speaker 3: girls out of it. So I'm like, okay, cool.
• 25:53
  Speaker 2: Yeah, Like Dad, I don't mean to be rude, but
• 25:56
  Speaker 2: like that was a pretty bad mistake. It was a
• 25:59
  Speaker 2: terrible Joe come on, sir, exactly.
• 26:02
  Speaker 3: But yeah, my little sister and I we moved in
• 26:06
  Speaker 3: and I studied and I worked three jobs, and I
• 26:09
  Speaker 3: said to Dad, I think I want to buy a house.
• 26:12
  Speaker 3: I need to buckle down. I'm going to buy a house.
• 26:14
  Speaker 3: I'm going to do it. And I was in my
• 26:16
  Speaker 3: boss bitch era like women supporting women, like strong independent women,
• 26:21
  Speaker 3: we can do this, Like I'm going to show the
• 26:22
  Speaker 3: world that I'm a single woman and I can do this.
• 26:25
  Speaker 2: You can. And I did.
• 26:27
  Speaker 3: I worked three jolly and I studied full time. And
• 26:31
  Speaker 3: every cent that I earned from those jobs that was
• 26:35
  Speaker 3: either a tile or some tap wear, or that was
• 26:39
  Speaker 3: a fitting in the house or that was upgraded carpet,
• 26:42
  Speaker 3: and I didn't want to spend it. So I was like,
• 26:44
  Speaker 3: that's that's my house right there, Like I can't watch
• 26:47
  Speaker 3: that go away.
• 26:48
  Speaker 2: No, but tell me about these three jobs? What three
• 26:52
  Speaker 2: jobs kind of clicked together with UNI because like it's
• 26:55
  Speaker 2: a bit chaotic. I did the same thing, and I
• 26:57
  Speaker 2: often get people being like, well, how did you do that?
• 27:00
  Speaker 2: Like how did you do it all? Yeah?
• 27:01
  Speaker 3: So I got a part time job as a medical receptionist.
• 27:05
  Speaker 3: I just when I got fired from my travel job.
• 27:08
  Speaker 3: I was like, what's going at the moment, what's out there?
• 27:10
  Speaker 2: And also that's a good job. Yeah, really good, really good.
• 27:13
  Speaker 2: So I worked that part time.
• 27:15
  Speaker 3: I think it was like two to three days a week,
• 27:17
  Speaker 3: and then I casually worked in the disability sector doing
• 27:20
  Speaker 3: like day programs are very cool.
• 27:22
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I loved it. It was good.
• 27:25
  Speaker 3: It brought the income in. I paid my rent and
• 27:27
  Speaker 3: I had savings. I was doing really good. And then
• 27:32
  Speaker 3: the time came and I said to Dad, let's go
• 27:35
  Speaker 3: land looking, let's go find some land.
• 27:37
  Speaker 2: I can do this and he said okay.
• 27:40
  Speaker 3: And that day I said to the land office is
• 27:43
  Speaker 3: this block available? And they said yep. I said I
• 27:46
  Speaker 3: want to deposit on that right now. And I paid
• 27:48
  Speaker 3: a deposit straight away.
• 27:50
  Speaker 4: Stop it.
• 27:50
  Speaker 2: What about that block of land made you go I
• 27:53
  Speaker 2: need that one?
• 27:54
  Speaker 3: It was just a good size. It wasn't on like
• 27:57
  Speaker 3: a tea intersection. My dad always says, don't buy a
• 27:59
  Speaker 3: tea intersection block. People's headlights come in your front window.
• 28:03
  Speaker 2: So I was like, it's not a corner block, it's
• 28:04
  Speaker 2: not a tea intersection block. It's big enough.
• 28:08
  Speaker 3: Like done, I'm happy it's it's a good price. Back
• 28:11
  Speaker 3: when land was like two hundred and sixty k, it
• 28:13
  Speaker 3: was a four hundred and fifty square block. It was
• 28:15
  Speaker 3: in our local town. I was still close to everything.
• 28:19
  Speaker 3: I was like, let's do it like it was a
• 28:21
  Speaker 3: new development.
• 28:23
  Speaker 2: And I did it.
• 28:24
  Speaker 3: And Dad were driving home from the land office and
• 28:27
  Speaker 3: Dad said, I've been saving for all three of you
• 28:30
  Speaker 3: girls for when you buy your first home or your
• 28:32
  Speaker 3: house and land, and I'm going to contribute ten grand dad,
• 28:37
  Speaker 3: and he gave me ten grand, and he gave my
• 28:40
  Speaker 3: younger sister ten grand and she did it. And unfortunately
• 28:44
  Speaker 3: my older sister is not in the picture, so her
• 28:48
  Speaker 3: just sits there. But yeah, so my dad gifted me that.
• 28:52
  Speaker 3: He said, you've worked really hard, and you know, you
• 28:55
  Speaker 3: set your mind to it and you're doing it.
• 28:57
  Speaker 2: Isn't that so beautiful? But also just the idea that
• 29:00
  Speaker 2: he did that and didn't tell you until after you'd
• 29:03
  Speaker 2: done it. That really gets even better. Stop it go.
• 29:07
  Speaker 2: I'm loving this story like I'm I'm buckled in bags.
• 29:11
  Speaker 3: Yeah, he's honestly, he's a legend. So a few years
• 29:15
  Speaker 3: went by, COVID hit still paying rent and Dad said,
• 29:21
  Speaker 3: all the rent that you and my sister paid. He's like,
• 29:24
  Speaker 3: I just paid the net on the mortgage and the
• 29:27
  Speaker 3: rest is in the count. And he gave us our
• 29:30
  Speaker 3: little Bendigo Bank little paper books, and he showed us
• 29:35
  Speaker 3: like what our savings were because of the on top
• 29:39
  Speaker 3: of the rent. Essentially, he's like, I saved the difference.
• 29:43
  Speaker 3: He's like, I am needed to cover my mortgage. I
• 29:45
  Speaker 3: don't want to make money off you girls. It's gone
• 29:47
  Speaker 3: back into a savings account for you both. And my
• 29:50
  Speaker 3: sister had hers and I had mine, and before I
• 29:53
  Speaker 3: knew it, I had like twenty five K just sitting
• 29:56
  Speaker 3: there without even realizing for when I decided on the
• 29:59
  Speaker 3: house when it was a Dad.
• 30:02
  Speaker 2: Oh, I love him. I love him so much. Like
• 30:06
  Speaker 2: Dad's a girl's girl.
• 30:08
  Speaker 3: He is.
• 30:08
  Speaker 2: He's very much a girl's gal.
• 30:11
  Speaker 3: So that kind of happened, and then I met my
• 30:14
  Speaker 3: now husband during COVID who kind of lived with me.
• 30:18
  Speaker 3: You know when that little bubble rule came in where
• 30:20
  Speaker 3: you could have an intimate partner, and I was like,
• 30:22
  Speaker 3: we've been dating a week, but sure you could be
• 30:25
  Speaker 3: my intimate partner because I don't want to be lonely.
• 30:27
  Speaker 2: And also, like I feel like COVID just like threw
• 30:31
  Speaker 2: you in. You either had to go boots and all
• 30:33
  Speaker 2: in on your relationship or I felt like everybody was
• 30:37
  Speaker 2: getting divorced exactly. There was no medium there. I don't
• 30:42
  Speaker 2: feel no, you're in or.
• 30:43
  Speaker 3: You're out, and you just need to tell me and
• 30:46
  Speaker 3: then we're going to go down that route. So yeah,
• 30:48
  Speaker 3: him and I remember thinking he worked one job. He
• 30:52
  Speaker 3: was on over one hundred k, Like how do you
• 30:55
  Speaker 3: earn a hundred k with one job? Like I'm working
• 30:57
  Speaker 3: three here? And then he didn't have a house. He
• 31:01
  Speaker 3: was living in a sharehouse, and I was just so,
• 31:03
  Speaker 3: what's what's going on here?
• 31:05
  Speaker 2: Like how are we so different? But how am I
• 31:07
  Speaker 2: so like invested in you?
• 31:09
  Speaker 3: Like how are you the person that I really like
• 31:12
  Speaker 3: and now is my husband?
• 31:14
  Speaker 2: Yeah? Yeah, you're like, what the hell? I want someone
• 31:17
  Speaker 2: more financially stable, but I'm in love with someone who's
• 31:20
  Speaker 2: not what the heck exactly your classics stitch up?
• 31:24
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I know, right, I know.
• 31:26
  Speaker 2: Luckily he's not a leech. But okay, no, that's good.
• 31:30
  Speaker 2: That's good. Like a lack of financial literacy is fine.
• 31:34
  Speaker 2: Where you can teach that being a leech, that's a
• 31:36
  Speaker 2: personality traite exactly.
• 31:39
  Speaker 3: So then, yeah, he kind of lived with me and
• 31:41
  Speaker 3: my sister still paid rent at his place, and then
• 31:44
  Speaker 3: he was a real big motivator in like saving like
• 31:48
  Speaker 3: he was. He was almost like a girls girl. Like
• 31:50
  Speaker 3: he'd be like, oh, you're saving, like you gotta gotta
• 31:53
  Speaker 3: like look at this. We're not going to go out
• 31:54
  Speaker 3: for dinner because you know, I don't want you to
• 31:55
  Speaker 3: spend that money because we're saving.
• 31:57
  Speaker 2: Like you've got this house.
• 31:58
  Speaker 3: You're doing so good, Like you're so out of me,
• 32:00
  Speaker 3: even though it didn't have anything to do with him,
• 32:03
  Speaker 3: and like he'd helped me make selection you.
• 32:06
  Speaker 2: Do achieve your goal and that's surely sweet. Yeah, it
• 32:10
  Speaker 2: was really nice.
• 32:10
  Speaker 3: He was like my biggest fan aside from my dad,
• 32:14
  Speaker 3: Like he was.
• 32:14
  Speaker 2: I was about to say, does he and your dad
• 32:16
  Speaker 2: get along really well?
• 32:18
  Speaker 3: They do? They do?
• 32:19
  Speaker 2: Yeah? Yeah, like a house on fire. Huh, Yes, he's
• 32:22
  Speaker 2: that my dad ever got Oh lucky lucky. I feel
• 32:25
  Speaker 2: like that's my husband and my dad. Like I'll lean
• 32:28
  Speaker 2: over and my my husband's cackling on the couch and
• 32:31
  Speaker 2: what are you laughing at? And you'd be like, oh,
• 32:33
  Speaker 2: I'm just texting Eric and I'll be like, yeah, okay,
• 32:36
  Speaker 2: like no worries.
• 32:38
  Speaker 3: Yeah, or they they hang out with your husband more
• 32:40
  Speaker 3: than they hang out with you sometimes and you're like.
• 32:42
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm the child. I'm your child, not him. Sometimes
• 32:46
  Speaker 2: I get invited as a plus one to do things. Yes, yeah, yeah.
• 32:50
  Speaker 2: Sometimes Steve will be like, oh, we're doing X with
• 32:54
  Speaker 2: your parents this weekend, and I'll be like, that's news
• 32:57
  Speaker 2: to me. Love that. I mean, it's so sweet. But
• 33:02
  Speaker 2: I understand at the start being like, ah am I
• 33:05
  Speaker 2: marrying my father, It is a worry sometimes it definitely is,
• 33:10
  Speaker 2: you know what, not mad not mad?
• 33:13
  Speaker 3: Dad set the bar he has he has And yes,
• 33:16
  Speaker 3: they get on very very well. I love that.
• 33:19
  Speaker 2: And so then fast forward.
• 33:21
  Speaker 3: Then we moved into that house and he came along
• 33:26
  Speaker 3: with me, and six weeks later we were pregnant with
• 33:29
  Speaker 3: our first child.
• 33:30
  Speaker 2: Stop it that's hold on is that obviously we love
• 33:33
  Speaker 2: having kids, but was that a purposeful pregnancy or like,
• 33:37
  Speaker 2: were you like right, six weeks we're moving in, we
• 33:39
  Speaker 2: are making a baby. It was more around like.
• 33:43
  Speaker 3: My job, like i'd finished UNI at this time, I
• 33:45
  Speaker 3: was in my job. I knew that I'd qualified from
• 33:48
  Speaker 3: maternity leave. But then I knew that I was going
• 33:51
  Speaker 3: for like a promotion at a certain time. So then
• 33:54
  Speaker 3: I needed to like either have a baby pre promotion
• 33:58
  Speaker 3: and pre wedding because I didn't want to be pregnant
• 34:01
  Speaker 3: at my wedding, even though there's nothing wrong with that,
• 34:03
  Speaker 3: it's just my choice.
• 34:04
  Speaker 2: No, it's funny because we all get in our head
• 34:06
  Speaker 2: just how we want our story to go.
• 34:09
  Speaker 3: Yeah, and then I was like, well, I don't really
• 34:11
  Speaker 3: want to delay it because you know, I kind of
• 34:13
  Speaker 3: wanted to have kids before thirty. And then wham bam,
• 34:17
  Speaker 3: thank you, ma'am one hit wonder pregnant.
• 34:20
  Speaker 2: Okay, nice for some envious, I know, I'm terribly sorry. No,
• 34:25
  Speaker 2: don't be sorry, never be sorry, but like a happy
• 34:29
  Speaker 2: I'm allowed to be a little bit envious of your success.
• 34:33
  Speaker 2: Thank you, Thank you. How good? So have a baby? Yes,
• 34:38
  Speaker 2: we had our baby. We had our baby.
• 34:40
  Speaker 3: And then it wasn't until I was on maternity leave,
• 34:42
  Speaker 3: and I really started to struggle. I was so finance
• 34:47
  Speaker 3: focused before having a baby, and then you go on
• 34:50
  Speaker 3: maternity leave and all of a sudden, you're not like
• 34:54
  Speaker 3: a huge bread winner. You're not, you know, financially like
• 34:58
  Speaker 3: controlling the situation or having to really budget. And I
• 35:02
  Speaker 3: just I struggled because I'd been so headstrong, and then
• 35:06
  Speaker 3: I couldn't really do much about it, and I almost
• 35:08
  Speaker 3: felt like a little bit trapped, like I wasn't contributing
• 35:11
  Speaker 3: as much anymore.
• 35:12
  Speaker 2: Like I had the house.
• 35:13
  Speaker 3: It was in my name, but on paper, like my
• 35:16
  Speaker 3: paycheck was less and it didn't match my husband's or
• 35:21
  Speaker 3: my fiance at the time. But then also we thought,
• 35:25
  Speaker 3: what do we want to do with our kids, Like
• 35:27
  Speaker 3: is this really want to raise them? Like, We've got
• 35:28
  Speaker 3: a great house. It's four bedroom, two living spaces, like
• 35:32
  Speaker 3: a nice backyard.
• 35:34
  Speaker 2: It was enough to we could have three kids there.
• 35:38
  Speaker 2: But I just wanted space. I wanted my kids to
• 35:42
  Speaker 2: grow up with.
• 35:44
  Speaker 3: Land to run around. I didn't like that the area
• 35:47
  Speaker 3: was getting so busy, and we started looking at regional
• 35:52
  Speaker 3: properties and regional land and seeing if that was an
• 35:55
  Speaker 3: option for us. We eventually nailed it down to one
• 36:00
  Speaker 3: town that we liked. It was close enough to the
• 36:02
  Speaker 3: city where we were both working, but it was far
• 36:04
  Speaker 3: enough out that it wasn't traffic and noise and chaos.
• 36:09
  Speaker 3: And we spoke to our broker. We just said, is
• 36:11
  Speaker 3: this possible. This is what we're looking at.
• 36:14
  Speaker 2: We found this land.
• 36:15
  Speaker 3: It was for five hundred thousand. I said, we can't
• 36:18
  Speaker 3: pay that, we can't afford that. And it sat there
• 36:21
  Speaker 3: for ages and I kept watching her listing every few
• 36:24
  Speaker 3: weeks and it started at five hundred K, then it
• 36:27
  Speaker 3: went down to four hundred and fifty K, and then
• 36:30
  Speaker 3: it went down to vendor wants to sell before Christmas?
• 36:34
  Speaker 2: I see, would you like to chat?
• 36:36
  Speaker 3: Yes, But I was like a bombshell, is not ready
• 36:40
  Speaker 3: to enter the village just yet?
• 36:41
  Speaker 2: No, No, we're not ready. No.
• 36:44
  Speaker 3: I let Christmas pass and it was still there, and
• 36:47
  Speaker 3: then it changed to open to offers stop.
• 36:50
  Speaker 2: It and we jumped on it. That was a thousand
• 36:53
  Speaker 2: percent made for you.
• 36:55
  Speaker 3: That's what I think it's just meant to be. And
• 36:57
  Speaker 3: we offered three hundred and thirty K and they said
• 37:01
  Speaker 3: it's not quite there, and we offered three point fifty
• 37:04
  Speaker 3: with a sixty day settlement, and it was done.
• 37:06
  Speaker 2: Oh my goodness.
• 37:08
  Speaker 3: They took it and we'd instantly wiped off one hundred
• 37:11
  Speaker 3: and fifty thousand dollars off the land price and we
• 37:14
  Speaker 3: just wore.
• 37:14
  Speaker 2: That two acres. It was amazing. Two a that is gorgeous.
• 37:19
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 37:20
  Speaker 3: So we were stoked, and our mortgage broker was like,
• 37:24
  Speaker 3: you can keep your house and you can buy this lound.
• 37:27
  Speaker 2: So we didn't have to get rid of it on
• 37:29
  Speaker 2: the condition that I.
• 37:30
  Speaker 3: Went back to work.
• 37:31
  Speaker 2: Yeah, okay, and then you were like, I'll go back
• 37:33
  Speaker 2: to work, no worries because I'm going to own two properties.
• 37:36
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 37:37
  Speaker 3: So our daughter was eight months old, and between my
• 37:39
  Speaker 3: dad having set days off and childcare, we made it work.
• 37:43
  Speaker 4: Stop.
• 37:44
  Speaker 2: Your dad helped, Yes, of course he did. I should
• 37:47
  Speaker 2: have known, so, yes, he chipped in. He was like
• 37:50
  Speaker 2: the third parent. It was amazing. I'm obsessed with your dad.
• 37:53
  Speaker 2: I just I'm so glad you had him. It was good.
• 37:57
  Speaker 3: And then came the decision of putting a house on
• 38:00
  Speaker 3: our land. We wanted this country ranch style house. I
• 38:05
  Speaker 3: had this huge one hundred meters frontage block that I
• 38:09
  Speaker 3: was like, I can't put this tiny, little fifteen meter
• 38:12
  Speaker 3: frontage house on.
• 38:14
  Speaker 2: So we went looking and it just didn't seem.
• 38:16
  Speaker 3: Like it was an option, unfortunately, and I sat down
• 38:21
  Speaker 3: with my husband and I said, look, I don't know
• 38:23
  Speaker 3: what to do, but this is our dream. I really
• 38:25
  Speaker 3: want our kids to grow up running around living their
• 38:29
  Speaker 3: best life, having a means to whatever they want, neighbors
• 38:34
  Speaker 3: down the road that we don't have to worry about
• 38:36
  Speaker 3: with cars passing by. And he turned around and said,
• 38:40
  Speaker 3: whatever you want to do, it's your choice.
• 38:43
  Speaker 2: And we sold my first house stop her. See your
• 38:47
  Speaker 2: husband's a girl's girl as well.
• 38:50
  Speaker 3: And it was a bittersweet, you know, it was my
• 38:52
  Speaker 3: first home. I would have loved to have held onto it.
• 38:55
  Speaker 3: But fortunate enough that COVID made where we live. We
• 38:59
  Speaker 3: were that first town just on the outside of Metro Melbourne,
• 39:04
  Speaker 3: so we were classed as regional. So during COVID it
• 39:07
  Speaker 3: absolutely boomed. So I made about two hundred and eighty
• 39:10
  Speaker 3: thousand dollars from the sale of my house.
• 39:12
  Speaker 2: Oh my god, I'm so happy. I'm so happy for you.
• 39:16
  Speaker 3: So it was worth it, and we put that money
• 39:19
  Speaker 3: straight back into building our dream home.
• 39:22
  Speaker 2: Stop and then you'd you get your dream home. What happened?
• 39:24
  Speaker 2: What happened? My hex step came back to haunt me. Ah, rude,
• 39:29
  Speaker 2: I know.
• 39:30
  Speaker 3: So I cleared it with the sale of the house,
• 39:32
  Speaker 3: and then we put about two hundred and fifty thousand
• 39:34
  Speaker 3: dollars into our forever home, and we put all the
• 39:38
  Speaker 3: bells and whistles in it that we wanted. It's our
• 39:41
  Speaker 3: dream home. We got our cathedral ceilings, we got our
• 39:45
  Speaker 3: red bricks, We've got our you know, rail and post
• 39:48
  Speaker 3: front fence. We've got twenty chickens roaming around the backyard
• 39:52
  Speaker 3: because it's.
• 39:52
  Speaker 2: Oh my heart, so so much space. And you know,
• 39:56
  Speaker 2: seeing that come to life was great.
• 39:59
  Speaker 3: But as soon as we we moved into our new
• 40:01
  Speaker 3: house three months later, we were pregnant with our second.
• 40:05
  Speaker 2: I love this journey of like pregnancy ease for you,
• 40:08
  Speaker 2: but also sometimes it's just nice when things don't happen
• 40:12
  Speaker 2: immediately exactly.
• 40:14
  Speaker 3: It just seems every time I buy a house or
• 40:16
  Speaker 3: make a big financial decision, we get pregnant.
• 40:20
  Speaker 2: Oh well, now you know, if there's a third on
• 40:22
  Speaker 2: the way, you're like, oh my god, we bought an
• 40:24
  Speaker 2: investment property. I'm going to call you up and be
• 40:26
  Speaker 2: like watch out.
• 40:27
  Speaker 3: Yeah, true, true, true, But yeah, now we have our
• 40:32
  Speaker 3: dream home.
• 40:33
  Speaker 2: We have everything we want in it.
• 40:36
  Speaker 3: We budget accordingly with our mortgage, we have savings that
• 40:43
  Speaker 3: we contribute to, we have financial goals and financial planning
• 40:48
  Speaker 3: that was just never a thing. Like our first big
• 40:51
  Speaker 3: achievement was getting the stream home, and we just really
• 40:54
  Speaker 3: made it work by crunching numbers, figuring out what we
• 40:58
  Speaker 3: could do, what we couldn't do, what was within our means.
• 41:01
  Speaker 3: And now we have this beautiful home with our two
• 41:05
  Speaker 3: daughters that we can't wait to see them grow up
• 41:09
  Speaker 3: and hopefully one day they bring their kids home to
• 41:12
  Speaker 3: this home and it stays with us forever.
• 41:16
  Speaker 2: So yeah, that's the coolest thing ever. And the coolest
• 41:20
  Speaker 2: thing about this is that you did that on your own,
• 41:22
  Speaker 2: Like you hustled, and I know that your dad helped
• 41:25
  Speaker 2: out a little bit with some cash here and there,
• 41:27
  Speaker 2: Like that was a surprise, but like that's not what
• 41:29
  Speaker 2: makes this story. Like the fact that you did that
• 41:32
  Speaker 2: on your own as a single girl. In her what
• 41:36
  Speaker 2: you said before Girl Boss era, You're like, how hard
• 41:39
  Speaker 2: could it be? Boys? Do it? Like I'm obsessed. I'm
• 41:44
  Speaker 2: just I'm such a girls girl.
• 41:45
  Speaker 3: I love empowering women and seeing women succeed, Like it
• 41:50
  Speaker 3: makes me proud, even though it's not my story half
• 41:54
  Speaker 3: the time.
• 41:55
  Speaker 2: And oh my goodness, don't that's me. That's me, And
• 41:57
  Speaker 2: like I have to backtrack a little bit because I'll
• 41:59
  Speaker 2: say somebody like you, I'll be like, oh my god,
• 42:01
  Speaker 2: money dost, I'm so proud of you. And then I
• 42:04
  Speaker 2: have to step back and go like, I'm proud of you,
• 42:06
  Speaker 2: but I didn't have anything to do with this, but like,
• 42:09
  Speaker 2: I just thanks for letting me in on the journey.
• 42:11
  Speaker 2: I suppose, yeah, like you're just emotionally invested in something that's.
• 42:14
  Speaker 3: Not to do with you.
• 42:15
  Speaker 2: And then you're like, why am I so emotional about this?
• 42:18
  Speaker 3: But you're just so it's so exciting seeing women succeed
• 42:22
  Speaker 3: and having this now, like my younger sisters didn't think
• 42:27
  Speaker 3: she could have it, and the amount of times I
• 42:29
  Speaker 3: was like I did it, you can do it, like
• 42:32
  Speaker 3: like we can do this, let's do it. Like I'll
• 42:34
  Speaker 3: help you, Like I'll sit down and she'll call me
• 42:37
  Speaker 3: and be like I need to work out my budget,
• 42:38
  Speaker 3: and I'm like, let's do it. Come on over, I'll
• 42:40
  Speaker 3: get a spreadsheet going, we'll get this going. We'll see
• 42:42
  Speaker 3: where you're going wrong, what we can do, what can
• 42:45
  Speaker 3: be done better, where things are going wrong, and it's
• 42:48
  Speaker 3: so much fun. And finances are fun to talk about now,
• 42:53
  Speaker 3: I think.
• 42:54
  Speaker 2: Yeah, if you can reframe them as empowerment, I think
• 42:57
  Speaker 2: that it opens and entire world up for you to
• 43:01
  Speaker 2: thrive in, and like it's just so fun helping other
• 43:05
  Speaker 2: people thrive. Like it's as though, like people will say
• 43:08
  Speaker 2: sometimes and obviously I do this a lot, it happens
• 43:11
  Speaker 2: to be in my career, but people will say, oh
• 43:14
  Speaker 2: my god, Victoria, like I can't believe, like you you
• 43:17
  Speaker 2: did that for me. That's so nice. And I'll be like,
• 43:20
  Speaker 2: I don't know how to tell you this, but I
• 43:22
  Speaker 2: almost can guarantee that I got more out of this
• 43:25
  Speaker 2: than you did, Like yeah, like I do my girlfriend's budgets. Still.
• 43:29
  Speaker 2: In fact, right after this money diary, I've got one
• 43:32
  Speaker 2: of my girlfriends coming over because she was like, oh,
• 43:34
  Speaker 2: v hey, could you like send me a budget template?
• 43:37
  Speaker 2: And I was like, no, queen, you're one of my
• 43:38
  Speaker 2: best friends. Come over and I'll just do it for you.
• 43:41
  Speaker 2: But like, I know she's gonna be grateful and that's
• 43:43
  Speaker 2: really nice, but I just get so much more out
• 43:46
  Speaker 2: of it than I think even she will, because I'm
• 43:48
  Speaker 2: just like, oh, like being able to put you in
• 43:51
  Speaker 2: a better position and help like, oh, I love it.
• 43:54
  Speaker 2: Numbers are so attractive, like exactly, exactly, so money diars's
• 44:00
  Speaker 2: talk more numbers. What do you do for work? How
• 44:02
  Speaker 2: much do you earn nowadays?
• 44:04
  Speaker 3: So I am a registered nurse, love, So that's what
• 44:08
  Speaker 3: you did at UNI.
• 44:09
  Speaker 2: Again, that is what I did at UNI.
• 44:11
  Speaker 3: And I'm incredibly fortunate with the position that I'm in
• 44:14
  Speaker 3: that I earn about two and a half grand.
• 44:18
  Speaker 2: Gross before tax a week. Very cool. But also I
• 44:23
  Speaker 2: don't know, would you say that someone's fortunate if they
• 44:26
  Speaker 2: hustled and worked their way there is that fortune or
• 44:29
  Speaker 2: is that hard work? I think I've landed in.
• 44:33
  Speaker 3: I used to be hospital nursing, and I have a
• 44:37
  Speaker 3: girl's girl of a neighbor who was like, hey, girl,
• 44:40
  Speaker 3: come work at the prison with me. Wear short nurses,
• 44:43
  Speaker 3: So I earn quite a lot more than other nurses.
• 44:49
  Speaker 3: So my gross is probably around one hundred and thirty
• 44:52
  Speaker 3: one hundred and forty.
• 44:53
  Speaker 2: Okay, But you also you also take more risk than
• 44:56
  Speaker 2: a lot of other nurses. I do. I do, but
• 45:00
  Speaker 2: it is enjoyable.
• 45:01
  Speaker 3: It's hard to bite your tongue sometimes, but we're there
• 45:05
  Speaker 3: for healthcare and I just have to remind myself that
• 45:08
  Speaker 3: I get to go home to.
• 45:09
  Speaker 2: My family that night. Oh yeah, I don't know how.
• 45:13
  Speaker 2: I think I would really struggle with that, Like sometimes
• 45:15
  Speaker 2: I would really struggle with that. Money. Dis tell me
• 45:19
  Speaker 2: we need to be perfect because, like you feel your
• 45:21
  Speaker 2: dream life basically what is your husband now? Husband earn
• 45:25
  Speaker 2: so he takes home.
• 45:27
  Speaker 3: Around three grand fortnite. He's on just over one hundred,
• 45:31
  Speaker 3: So between the two of us we bring in about
• 45:34
  Speaker 3: six and a half thousand a fortnight.
• 45:37
  Speaker 2: I'm obsessed. I love this. I love this so much.
• 45:40
  Speaker 2: Tell me what's your big money goal? What are you
• 45:42
  Speaker 2: guys currently working towards. We would absolutely love to get
• 45:46
  Speaker 2: our landscaping done. It's quite quite a big job, Isn't
• 45:51
  Speaker 2: it crazy how much more expensive landscaping is than you
• 45:53
  Speaker 2: think it's going to be. It's insane, absolutely insane.
• 45:58
  Speaker 3: But we also when we bought this land, we wanted
• 46:03
  Speaker 3: space because I know that my dad doesn't want to
• 46:06
  Speaker 3: go to a nursing home when he's older, So we
• 46:09
  Speaker 3: will be putting a runny flat on our land. You
• 46:13
  Speaker 3: and he can live there, and I want my kids
• 46:16
  Speaker 3: to grow up with their grandparents as much as they
• 46:18
  Speaker 3: possibly can.
• 46:19
  Speaker 2: That's so sweet. You are literally so sweet. But also
• 46:22
  Speaker 2: I'm pretty sure that means you might get a built
• 46:24
  Speaker 2: in gardener. Like that's pretty cool, I would say, so.
• 46:28
  Speaker 2: I would say so, like we don't want to put
• 46:30
  Speaker 2: the cart before the horse, but like I feel like
• 46:33
  Speaker 2: I know your dad well enough.
• 46:34
  Speaker 3: Now you know, yes, he built our chicken coop with
• 46:37
  Speaker 3: my husband, so we definitely will have a gardener in
• 46:40
  Speaker 3: the middle.
• 46:40
  Speaker 2: There you go. All right, money Diarist, let's go to
• 46:43
  Speaker 2: a really quick break and on the flip side, we're
• 46:45
  Speaker 2: going to be talking about investments, debt, personal insurance, and
• 46:47
  Speaker 2: your best and worst money habits. So guys don't go anywhere.
• 46:55
  Speaker 2: All right, money Diarist, we are back, and I want
• 46:57
  Speaker 2: to talk investments. In your letter in you meant that
• 47:00
  Speaker 2: you have some investments. What are they? How did you start,
• 47:04
  Speaker 2: Why did you start? What does it look like?
• 47:06
  Speaker 3: So? I have my super like most other people, and
• 47:11
  Speaker 3: that is sitting at one hundred and twenty four thousand
• 47:13
  Speaker 3: dollars currently. I also have a Raise investing account, which
• 47:20
  Speaker 3: I got onto because of She's on the money when
• 47:22
  Speaker 3: I started deep diving into all the podcasts, and that
• 47:25
  Speaker 3: has about eight hundred dollars in it. Oh, okay, Yeah,
• 47:30
  Speaker 3: just from contributing like twenty dollars here and there and
• 47:33
  Speaker 3: top ups, so yeah, that's kind of starting to add up.
• 47:38
  Speaker 3: And then we also have savings accounts for our two children,
• 47:44
  Speaker 3: which our first daughter has about four thousand dollars in it,
• 47:48
  Speaker 3: and that is invested as well. And then unfortunately our
• 47:52
  Speaker 3: second we got onto that a little bit late to
• 47:55
  Speaker 3: the game second child things, so her savings and investing
• 47:58
  Speaker 3: has only been up for about two months.
• 48:01
  Speaker 2: But that's okay because like she's going to have heaps
• 48:03
  Speaker 2: of time to grow that over time, Like that's not
• 48:06
  Speaker 2: the end of the world.
• 48:07
  Speaker 3: She will and if all ours fails, my dad also
• 48:12
  Speaker 3: has savings accounts for the girls, so she's probably got
• 48:15
  Speaker 3: more in dad's savings than now.
• 48:17
  Speaker 2: Oh my goodness. See I told you your dad's a
• 48:21
  Speaker 2: girl's girl. He's got their back. He is, he definitely is.
• 48:24
  Speaker 3: But they're our main investments at the moment.
• 48:27
  Speaker 2: My husband used to have investments, but in.
• 48:31
  Speaker 3: Our early days when we didn't quite understand investing very much,
• 48:35
  Speaker 3: he sold them. But we have just entered into that
• 48:40
  Speaker 3: game again in like the most recent weeks.
• 48:43
  Speaker 2: I feel like that's a really common story, Like, you know,
• 48:46
  Speaker 2: if you don't understand something when you dive in. It's
• 48:49
  Speaker 2: one of the first things to go when, like you know,
• 48:51
  Speaker 2: you go, oh, maybe I could do something better with
• 48:53
  Speaker 2: that money because you don't fully comprehend the bigger picture
• 48:56
  Speaker 2: at that point. Like that's fine, these things happened, but
• 48:59
  Speaker 2: like a good lesson to have learned that now you're
• 49:02
  Speaker 2: back on the train, that you probably won't pull it
• 49:05
  Speaker 2: out again. Absolutely not, absolutely not. Yeah, listen to you.
• 49:08
  Speaker 3: You're like, no, he will not be touching that exactly
• 49:12
  Speaker 3: over my dead body.
• 49:13
  Speaker 2: Where you take your investments out, Okay, I love that
• 49:16
  Speaker 2: because I can't give you advice, but it sounds like
• 49:18
  Speaker 2: you don't even need it. Money direst talk to me
• 49:21
  Speaker 2: about debt. We know that you sold your first house
• 49:24
  Speaker 2: to fund this next house, but what type of situation
• 49:27
  Speaker 2: you in when it comes to mortgages.
• 49:29
  Speaker 3: So we only have our mortgage as our debt. It
• 49:32
  Speaker 3: is eight hundred and fifty thousand dollars, so it is
• 49:36
  Speaker 3: probably on the higher end. But we also have our
• 49:39
  Speaker 3: dream home and we pay fortnightly and pay off extra
• 49:44
  Speaker 3: each fortnite as well. So we're hoping to just knock
• 49:47
  Speaker 3: that down in about twenty years. I'd love to have
• 49:50
  Speaker 3: our mortgage paid off in about twenty years.
• 49:52
  Speaker 2: Oh, I don't know why you, of all people wouldn't
• 49:55
  Speaker 2: be able to achieve that. I've seen what you've done before, Like,
• 49:58
  Speaker 2: why wouldn't it be possible in the few Tell me
• 50:01
  Speaker 2: about your personal insurance situation. Is that something that you've
• 50:04
  Speaker 2: got your finger on the pulse with?
• 50:05
  Speaker 3: So it's probably my downfall. We do have health insurance.
• 50:10
  Speaker 3: Having our two daughters through the private system was a
• 50:15
  Speaker 3: value for us, so we value our private health insurance.
• 50:20
  Speaker 3: I also have pet insurance because we have a sausage
• 50:23
  Speaker 3: dog and a broken back.
• 50:25
  Speaker 2: Once, so.
• 50:28
  Speaker 3: We do not need to worry about him anymore. And then,
• 50:32
  Speaker 3: unfortunately it's I hate to say it, but it's whatever's
• 50:36
  Speaker 3: in my super I really need to look into income
• 50:40
  Speaker 3: protection and things like that, because our income is probably
• 50:44
  Speaker 3: one of the most valuable things, Like that's where our
• 50:45
  Speaker 3: money comes from. So like I remember listening to a
• 50:48
  Speaker 3: podcast and you are like, it's your income. Why wouldn't
• 50:51
  Speaker 3: you protect that asset? And I'm like, that is so true.
• 50:55
  Speaker 2: Well, I know, and I feel sometimes like a bit
• 50:57
  Speaker 2: of a broken record, or maybe I feel a bit preachy.
• 51:00
  Speaker 2: I'm not sure. But I look at it and I go,
• 51:03
  Speaker 2: we ensure our cars, like all of my friends and
• 51:07
  Speaker 2: like everyone that I know in my community, like they
• 51:10
  Speaker 2: wouldn't let their car insurance laps because they all understand
• 51:13
  Speaker 2: like that would be silly. Like what if you got
• 51:15
  Speaker 2: in an accident and your car got written off, Like, oh,
• 51:18
  Speaker 2: that's crazy, Like you wouldn't even comprehend it. But you
• 51:21
  Speaker 2: don't ensure your income, which if that tomorrow, you couldn't
• 51:25
  Speaker 2: earn the dream home. I'm really sorry, it's not going
• 51:28
  Speaker 2: to last. Like, as I've said a million times before,
• 51:31
  Speaker 2: and I used to say a lot when I was
• 51:33
  Speaker 2: a financial advisor, Like if you told me, Victoria, you
• 51:36
  Speaker 2: can only have one type of insurance out of all
• 51:38
  Speaker 2: the insurances. Like I'd give up my car insurance, I
• 51:41
  Speaker 2: give up my house insurance. I'd give up everything button
• 51:44
  Speaker 2: my income protection, because if I can't earn an income,
• 51:48
  Speaker 2: my entire life is going to crumble. Like I'm I
• 51:52
  Speaker 2: can buy a new car with my money that my
• 51:53
  Speaker 2: income protection pays me, but I can't buy an income
• 51:56
  Speaker 2: with the car that's been protected, Like it makes no
• 51:59
  Speaker 2: sense to me.
• 52:00
  Speaker 3: Exactly, Yes, I do need to get onto my income protection.
• 52:05
  Speaker 3: It's that little thing that just sits in the back
• 52:07
  Speaker 3: of your mind that you know you need to do,
• 52:08
  Speaker 3: but you're just like, Oh I forgot today, Oh I
• 52:11
  Speaker 3: need to get onto it.
• 52:12
  Speaker 2: I'll give you a little prod after the show. Don't
• 52:14
  Speaker 2: you worry money, diarist? I want to know when it
• 52:18
  Speaker 2: comes to best and worst money habits. I feel like
• 52:20
  Speaker 2: you've probably got some really good ones, Like we've already
• 52:23
  Speaker 2: heard how good you are at putting all your money
• 52:25
  Speaker 2: away and saving and hustling and delayed gratification, like you
• 52:29
  Speaker 2: let that house stay on the market or that block
• 52:31
  Speaker 2: of land stay on the market for so long. I
• 52:34
  Speaker 2: don't know if I have that in me. What do
• 52:36
  Speaker 2: you think your best money habit is?
• 52:38
  Speaker 3: So my best money habit would have to be I
• 52:43
  Speaker 3: never pay for anything full price. I refuse to pay
• 52:47
  Speaker 3: for things full price when I know that there are
• 52:49
  Speaker 3: sales there. If I'm online shopping or needing something online,
• 52:53
  Speaker 3: if there's like a code box where you can put
• 52:56
  Speaker 3: in a discount code or a promo code, can bet
• 53:00
  Speaker 3: I will find a promo code. But then, also, after
• 53:03
  Speaker 3: having two kids, I realized they grow so quickly, and
• 53:07
  Speaker 3: I had all these like really nice clothes to my
• 53:09
  Speaker 3: girls that I started selling their clothes secondhand, and there's
• 53:15
  Speaker 3: a huge mark of people that don't want to pay
• 53:18
  Speaker 3: full price for clothes or they're happy to buy secondhand things.
• 53:22
  Speaker 3: And then I started buying things off you know, like Facebook,
• 53:25
  Speaker 3: Marketplace or i'd share with my friends. We had like
• 53:27
  Speaker 3: a revolving wardrobe, and like you'd like let something out
• 53:31
  Speaker 3: to a friend and then it would come back after
• 53:33
  Speaker 3: their child had used it because they might have been
• 53:35
  Speaker 3: a bigger size, or like they needed the use for it,
• 53:38
  Speaker 3: or they had a baby, and I didn't have a
• 53:39
  Speaker 3: baby at the time, so I refused to play full
• 53:43
  Speaker 3: price for things. I'm happy for my kids to wear
• 53:46
  Speaker 3: secondhand things. But then also, yeah, I managed to start
• 53:51
  Speaker 3: a little side hustle out of it by essentially like
• 53:54
  Speaker 3: flipping clothes and kids wear things.
• 53:57
  Speaker 2: That's so good and it's also so true, like I
• 54:01
  Speaker 2: don't mind putting my kids in secondhand stuff insect I
• 54:04
  Speaker 2: would prefer it. Don't get me wrong, I do love
• 54:07
  Speaker 2: a shopping moment sometimes, but I feel like kids grow
• 54:10
  Speaker 2: so quickly that my kids literally one week fit in
• 54:14
  Speaker 2: something the next week, don't. I'm like, oh my goodness,
• 54:17
  Speaker 2: if someone could just sell me a bundle of like
• 54:20
  Speaker 2: kid's clothes in my kid's size, or if my friend
• 54:22
  Speaker 2: had it, like it'd just be so much easier.
• 54:25
  Speaker 3: It is, And that's kind of how I guess I
• 54:27
  Speaker 3: got onto it because first time mum, I was buying
• 54:30
  Speaker 3: new things for my little one, Like their amount of
• 54:33
  Speaker 3: Gorman in her wardrobe is ridiculous, like absolutely ridiculous.
• 54:37
  Speaker 2: I love that for her, though I do it. Three
• 54:39
  Speaker 2: and a half year old needs to be in Gorman.
• 54:41
  Speaker 2: But you're apparently apparently mine.
• 54:44
  Speaker 3: But I found some things on Marketplace, but they're in
• 54:47
  Speaker 3: a bundle, and I only wanted the one jumper, so
• 54:50
  Speaker 3: I bought the bundle for one hundred dollars and I
• 54:52
  Speaker 3: ended up sending like a video message to my best
• 54:54
  Speaker 3: friend and was like, I could resell all this. Parents
• 54:59
  Speaker 3: don't want to buy new things. I just want this
• 55:02
  Speaker 3: one jumper, and I resold it and I went to
• 55:05
  Speaker 3: the baby market, the local baby market, and made like
• 55:08
  Speaker 3: eighteen hundred.
• 55:08
  Speaker 2: Dollars stop it.
• 55:10
  Speaker 3: Yeah that's iconic, And I kept the Gorman jumper for
• 55:13
  Speaker 3: my little one.
• 55:14
  Speaker 2: Yeah, like I mean, you've got to take the cream
• 55:17
  Speaker 2: off the top exactly.
• 55:18
  Speaker 3: So yeah, I started secondhand buying and it was game changer.
• 55:22
  Speaker 2: I love that, And also I love that you made
• 55:26
  Speaker 2: like a kind of a game like something that you
• 55:29
  Speaker 2: were already like. Oh, I love a little secondhand moment.
• 55:31
  Speaker 2: Found this jumper I liked. Sorry, you found a way
• 55:34
  Speaker 2: to make money off that. That's genius. Yeah.
• 55:36
  Speaker 3: It also keeps my husband a little bit happy when
• 55:39
  Speaker 3: the kids have so much clothes because I just remind
• 55:42
  Speaker 3: him that mums love secondhand things.
• 55:45
  Speaker 2: We can resell it at a fraction of the price exactly,
• 55:48
  Speaker 2: like you're just doing him a service, honestly, Like, and
• 55:52
  Speaker 2: also remind him we thought you were a girl's girl,
• 55:55
  Speaker 2: Like come on, yeah, come on exactly.
• 55:58
  Speaker 3: We just need to remind him that's the Gorman Jumper
• 56:01
  Speaker 3: cannot go to daycare. We've had to have a few
• 56:03
  Speaker 3: talks about that.
• 56:04
  Speaker 2: Oh, don't, don't, don't. I don't want to have that
• 56:07
  Speaker 2: conversation right now. I have a bone to pick with
• 56:10
  Speaker 2: my husband about that and the fact that a Ralph
• 56:14
  Speaker 2: Lauren Puffer vest ended up at daycare and it now
• 56:18
  Speaker 2: has paint on it. It's not a daycare item, yes,
• 56:21
  Speaker 2: but like, why don't they just see it the same
• 56:22
  Speaker 2: way we do exactly exactly. They just never liked it.
• 56:25
  Speaker 2: And I know it's slightly out of touch that my
• 56:28
  Speaker 2: two year old has a Ralph Lauren puffer vest. I'd
• 56:31
  Speaker 2: just like to disclaimer that I bought it on Super
• 56:33
  Speaker 2: Sale more money off was very happy with it. I
• 56:36
  Speaker 2: also made sure I bought it in a size three
• 56:38
  Speaker 2: because I was like, we're going to get the most
• 56:39
  Speaker 2: wear out of this, Like a size four would have
• 56:42
  Speaker 2: looked like he was swamped in it and wouldn't have
• 56:44
  Speaker 2: kept him warm. So I was like, I'm going to
• 56:46
  Speaker 2: push it, get a size three. We're going to get
• 56:47
  Speaker 2: so much wear out of this. He's going to look
• 56:49
  Speaker 2: so cute every weekend, not at daycare, and it made
• 56:53
  Speaker 2: it to daycare. I was like, is this a joke?
• 56:55
  Speaker 2: Is my life a joke?
• 56:56
  Speaker 3: To you?
• 56:56
  Speaker 2: Steven?
• 56:58
  Speaker 3: They just don't get it because we girl math as well.
• 57:01
  Speaker 3: How many wears they're going to get out of it?
• 57:02
  Speaker 2: They're going to get an extra year out of it.
• 57:04
  Speaker 2: Is it a neutral color? Can the next baby wear it? Perfect?
• 57:08
  Speaker 3: The next baby can wear it? So you're getting two
• 57:10
  Speaker 3: for the price of one. Really two kids one puffa
• 57:13
  Speaker 3: jacket exactly?
• 57:15
  Speaker 2: And then you know what, he hits me with logic.
• 57:17
  Speaker 2: He goes, well, why would we have bought him a
• 57:20
  Speaker 2: puffer vest that he can't just wear always. Sorry, sit down,
• 57:23
  Speaker 2: because we have nice outings, exactly. And he's like, when
• 57:28
  Speaker 2: I don't want to hear that, I don't want to
• 57:30
  Speaker 2: question me.
• 57:30
  Speaker 3: I will resell it. And when I make money on it,
• 57:32
  Speaker 3: you won't be mad at me then, will you.
• 57:34
  Speaker 2: I'm calling money direst up. She's gonna have my back exactly, exactly.
• 57:38
  Speaker 3: And that's a good resell brand as well, exactly.
• 57:42
  Speaker 2: It holds its value well, it doesn't now money DRIs
• 57:45
  Speaker 2: does it because it's got green paint, parrot on the
• 57:47
  Speaker 2: front of it, it's got character, it's vintage. No, now
• 57:50
  Speaker 2: he looks like he's very well dressed at daycare with
• 57:53
  Speaker 2: paint on him a lot of the time, because like,
• 57:56
  Speaker 2: you're gonna be wearing that to daycare now, absolutely, you're
• 57:59
  Speaker 2: getting the extra wear out of it now. So tell
• 58:01
  Speaker 2: me what's your worst money habit.
• 58:03
  Speaker 3: My worst money habit is if you catch me on
• 58:08
  Speaker 3: like a down day or in just one of those
• 58:10
  Speaker 3: moods and you say let's go for coffee, I'm your girl.
• 58:14
  Speaker 3: I'm at coffee, or I'm at dinner, or I'm at lunch,
• 58:18
  Speaker 3: like even last week, at work.
• 58:19
  Speaker 2: They were like, we're going to go get coffee. Who
• 58:21
  Speaker 2: wants one?
• 58:22
  Speaker 3: Did I account for coffee that day?
• 58:25
  Speaker 2: I absolutely did not. Did I get coffee that day?
• 58:28
  Speaker 2: I sure did. But you know what, sometimes it's about
• 58:31
  Speaker 2: enjoying the journey it is.
• 58:32
  Speaker 3: And we had great chats walking to the cafe and
• 58:36
  Speaker 3: we just talked all things. Girls.
• 58:37
  Speaker 2: We actually talked about she's on the money, to be
• 58:39
  Speaker 2: completely honest, Oh pays for itself in like I probably
• 58:43
  Speaker 2: owe you were coffee exactly.
• 58:45
  Speaker 3: We're talking about coffee, and we're actually talking about the Monday,
• 58:49
  Speaker 3: like the money diaries on Mondays.
• 58:51
  Speaker 2: And yeah, we're all talking about it.
• 58:53
  Speaker 3: And then before I knew it, I had my coffee
• 58:55
  Speaker 3: in my hand.
• 58:55
  Speaker 2: And I was like four bucks out of pocket? But whatever,
• 58:58
  Speaker 2: hold on? Where are you getting a coffee that's only
• 59:00
  Speaker 2: four dollars?
• 59:01
  Speaker 3: Well, it's prison coffee, so one day it might be
• 59:03
  Speaker 3: a dollar, the next it's like four dollars.
• 59:06
  Speaker 2: Like it's the cafe in the prison. What what hold on?
• 59:09
  Speaker 2: Hold on? Why has it got a floating price point?
• 59:13
  Speaker 2: It's just whatever they charge on the day. Wait, the
• 59:17
  Speaker 2: prisoners come up with that. No, there's officers that work there.
• 59:20
  Speaker 3: But like the prisoners will be like learning how to
• 59:23
  Speaker 3: like like make a coffee with like the coffee machine,
• 59:26
  Speaker 3: and like they'll do their brewster course. So then we
• 59:28
  Speaker 3: just order and then whatever comes up on that FPOs
• 59:31
  Speaker 3: machine is how much it is for the day. So okay,
• 59:34
  Speaker 3: some days, yeah, four dollars, some days is two dollars,
• 59:36
  Speaker 3: some days it's a dollar, and it's like a cafe coffee, okay.
• 59:40
  Speaker 2: I mean, I'm not mad about who's made it, where
• 59:43
  Speaker 2: it's come from. I just I don't know if I
• 59:45
  Speaker 2: like the price tag shock, like is it going to
• 59:48
  Speaker 2: be double? Is it going to be single? Who's making
• 59:51
  Speaker 2: these rules? I don't know.
• 59:53
  Speaker 3: I don't think it's ever been over five dollars. But
• 59:56
  Speaker 3: if I if I know, I've.
• 59:57
  Speaker 2: Got ten dollars on like the splurge card. We're good,
• 1:00:00
  Speaker 2: You're good, Okay, all right. I feel like I could
• 1:00:02
  Speaker 2: ask you a million questions, but unfortunately I'm running out
• 1:00:05
  Speaker 2: of time. Money, Diarist. Now that we've had a good
• 1:00:08
  Speaker 2: chat today, and I feel like you've probably verbalized a
• 1:00:12
  Speaker 2: lot of things that either you haven't before you haven't
• 1:00:15
  Speaker 2: spoken about in succession. Do you think that the grade
• 1:00:19
  Speaker 2: you gave yourself at the start of this episode was fair.
• 1:00:22
  Speaker 3: I think maybe I could edge it to a B
• 1:00:26
  Speaker 3: B plus, but I'm definitely not in a territory like
• 1:00:29
  Speaker 3: it's different when you put it all out there and
• 1:00:32
  Speaker 3: you think, actually, yeah, I've done it right when you
• 1:00:35
  Speaker 3: put it all together. So yeah, I think I'll upgrade
• 1:00:38
  Speaker 3: from a B minus to a B plus. We've really
• 1:00:41
  Speaker 3: upgraded quickly today.
• 1:00:43
  Speaker 2: I love that. And what would it take to get
• 1:00:46
  Speaker 2: you to say, oh, Victoria, I think I'm an A.
• 1:00:49
  Speaker 3: I think I really do need to sort out my
• 1:00:51
  Speaker 3: personal insurances. Oh that's easy, yeah, because I know that
• 1:00:54
  Speaker 3: we have the means. My husband and I we do
• 1:00:57
  Speaker 3: fortnightly date night where we do our budgeting spa sheet
• 1:01:00
  Speaker 3: and go over the numbers. We track every transaction, so
• 1:01:03
  Speaker 3: I know that there's a surplus there to be able
• 1:01:05
  Speaker 3: to account for personal insurance. It's just sitting down and
• 1:01:11
  Speaker 3: actually doing it is the issue at the moment. I think,
• 1:01:15
  Speaker 3: like getting in that headspace.
• 1:01:17
  Speaker 2: Do you know what's really interesting about what you've just
• 1:01:19
  Speaker 2: said is you're like, oh, I know I've got, like,
• 1:01:21
  Speaker 2: you know, some budget set aside. We could absolutely do that.
• 1:01:25
  Speaker 2: But I was talking to Phil the other day, in fact,
• 1:01:27
  Speaker 2: I had him on the show a couple of weeks ago,
• 1:01:30
  Speaker 2: and he was saying that a lot of people come
• 1:01:33
  Speaker 2: to him and expect the exact same thing that you
• 1:01:35
  Speaker 2: just said, Like they're like, okay, like you know, I
• 1:01:37
  Speaker 2: know I need to pay for this, but he rejigs
• 1:01:40
  Speaker 2: their insurance inside their supranuation, and a lot of the
• 1:01:42
  Speaker 2: time they actually end up saving money. Like, yes, you
• 1:01:46
  Speaker 2: could pick to have some stuff outside of superanuation, but
• 1:01:49
  Speaker 2: a lot of the time you probably just have default
• 1:01:52
  Speaker 2: insurances inside your superanuation fund that can be great sometimes
• 1:01:57
  Speaker 2: but sometimes are not enough. But you can get a
• 1:02:00
  Speaker 2: different policy with a different insurance company and still have
• 1:02:04
  Speaker 2: it paid for through your super and therefore save money.
• 1:02:07
  Speaker 2: So even if you don't have the budget for it,
• 1:02:10
  Speaker 2: and you're like, oh, I don't know if I could
• 1:02:12
  Speaker 2: pay for income protection outside of SUPER, well you don't
• 1:02:16
  Speaker 2: have to, Like it could stay inside your super and
• 1:02:19
  Speaker 2: not impact your cash flow. I love that. Yeah, there's
• 1:02:22
  Speaker 2: like a whole conversation around what that could look like,
• 1:02:25
  Speaker 2: because you know, I feel like in this economy, we
• 1:02:29
  Speaker 2: need more insurance, but we're also all a little bit
• 1:02:32
  Speaker 2: apprehensive of setting it up because you're like, my budget
• 1:02:34
  Speaker 2: is already hamstrung Victoria, Like now is not the time,
• 1:02:38
  Speaker 2: Like I can afford the initial like you know, for
• 1:02:40
  Speaker 2: five hundred dollars fee to see the advisor, but like
• 1:02:43
  Speaker 2: what if it's thousands a year and I go, well,
• 1:02:46
  Speaker 2: it doesn't have to be like that could all be
• 1:02:48
  Speaker 2: structured inside your super. The only thing that you're not
• 1:02:51
  Speaker 2: allowed inside your super to go on like a little
• 1:02:53
  Speaker 2: insurance rant is trauma insurance, and that I would say
• 1:02:57
  Speaker 2: is the nice to have insurance. But you're income protection,
• 1:03:01
  Speaker 2: your TPD, and your life insurance can all sit inside
• 1:03:04
  Speaker 2: your super. Lots of people already have them inside of super,
• 1:03:07
  Speaker 2: and if you already have it inside of super, it
• 1:03:09
  Speaker 2: might not even be working that hard for you, and
• 1:03:11
  Speaker 2: you could get a better policy for cheaper somewhere else,
• 1:03:14
  Speaker 2: still inside that environment, so your cash flow is not impacted.
• 1:03:18
  Speaker 3: I definitely need to look into that and sort it
• 1:03:20
  Speaker 3: out one hundred percent.
• 1:03:22
  Speaker 2: You need to go talk to Phil help me out.
• 1:03:24
  Speaker 2: Then I'll let him know. But do you know what,
• 1:03:27
  Speaker 2: you guys are so lucky that I'm not religious because
• 1:03:30
  Speaker 2: I'm preachy about insurance. Imagine if I had religion behind
• 1:03:34
  Speaker 2: me as well, like no one would listen to me,
• 1:03:37
  Speaker 2: which is probably a benefit for all of us.
• 1:03:40
  Speaker 3: I think people would listen to you money is sexy
• 1:03:42
  Speaker 3: talking about money and finances and empowering women. It's sexy,
• 1:03:46
  Speaker 3: it's controlling, and it's empowering women to take control of
• 1:03:50
  Speaker 3: their own life because unfortunately, we live in a society
• 1:03:54
  Speaker 3: where you know, there is a gender pay gap and
• 1:03:57
  Speaker 3: things like that. So I think we've always got to
• 1:03:58
  Speaker 3: look out for each other, so our listen For sure.
• 1:04:01
  Speaker 2: I appreciate you, and I feel like we've got each
• 1:04:04
  Speaker 2: other's back money direst I wish we had more time
• 1:04:06
  Speaker 2: to chat, but we have recorded for so long today
• 1:04:10
  Speaker 2: and I'm just so grateful for every minute of it,
• 1:04:12
  Speaker 2: for you sharing your story, what you've been through, and
• 1:04:14
  Speaker 2: like everything in between. It has been an absolute pleasure,
• 1:04:17
  Speaker 2: and I really hope that you and I get to
• 1:04:19
  Speaker 2: cross paths in person at some point. Thank you so much.
• 1:04:22
  Speaker 2: Thanks for having me. It was amazing.
• 1:04:30
  Speaker 5: The advice shared on She's on the Money is general
• 1:04:32
  Speaker 5: in nature and does not consider your individual circumstances. She's
• 1:04:36
  Speaker 5: on the Money exists purely for educational purposes and should
• 1:04:40
  Speaker 5: not be relied upon to make an investment or financial decision.
• 1:04:43
  Speaker 5: If you do choose to buy a financial product, Read
• 1:04:46
  Speaker 5: the PDS TMD and obtain appropriate financial advice tailored towards
• 1:04:50
  Speaker 5: your needs. Victoria Divine and She's on the Money are
• 1:04:53
  Speaker 5: authorized representatives of Money showper Pty Ltd ABN three.
• 1:04:58
  Speaker 2: Two one is six four nine and two seven seven
• 1:05:01
  Speaker 2: zero eight a f s L four five one two
• 1:05:04
  Speaker 2: eight nine