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Transcript

From Pain to Purpose: How to Heal and Reconnect with Your Inner Child · Bent Not Broken: Starting Over After Divorce | Post Divorce Life

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome to another episode of Bent Not Broken.
• 0:04
  SPEAKER_00: Heartbreak and trauma may feel like the end of your story, but here it's the beginning of a bold new chapter.
• 0:14
  SPEAKER_00: I'm your host, Coach Deborah Griffiths, and this is the space where women rise, rebuild, and rediscover their purpose.
• 0:23
  SPEAKER_00: Remember this truth.
• 0:25
  SPEAKER_00: You are bent not broken.
• 0:32
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome back to this Bent Not Broken bonus episode.
• 0:36
  SPEAKER_00: I'm Coach Deborah, and today I want to take a few moments to reflect on my powerful conversation with therapist, survivor, and author Stacy Schaefer.
• 0:48
  SPEAKER_00: Stacy reminded us that healing doesn't mean erasing your past.
• 0:52
  SPEAKER_00: It means integrating it.
• 0:55
  SPEAKER_00: Her story is a beautiful example of what it looks like to turn pain into purpose.
• 1:00
  SPEAKER_00: And I will break this episode down into four segments with some coaching tips.
• 1:06
  SPEAKER_00: Segment one, the child within still speaks.
• 1:10
  SPEAKER_00: When Stacy shared how she built the life on perfectionism, it hit home for so many of us, including me.
• 1:19
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe you've done it too, striving to be the good one, the helper, the one who holds it all together.
• 1:26
  SPEAKER_00: But beneath that perfection is often a child still longing to be seen, heard, and understood.
• 1:36
  SPEAKER_00: Coaching tip number one.
• 1:38
  SPEAKER_00: Take a moment today to ask yourself, what did my younger self need to hear that she didn't?
• 1:45
  SPEAKER_00: Write it down.
• 1:46
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe it's you're not too much.
• 1:50
  SPEAKER_00: Or you are safe now.
• 1:52
  SPEAKER_00: This isn't about dwelling on the past.
• 1:55
  SPEAKER_00: It's about giving love to the parts of you that never received it.
• 2:00
  SPEAKER_00: Segment two, seeing and hearing others.
• 2:04
  SPEAKER_00: One of my favorite moments in our talk was when Stacy said she asked kids, help me understand what it's like to be you.
• 2:14
  SPEAKER_00: That question is powerful, not just for children, but for every human being who's ever felt unseen.
• 2:24
  SPEAKER_00: Coaching tip number two.
• 2:26
  SPEAKER_00: Use that same question in your relationships with your partner, your children, or even your friends.
• 2:34
  SPEAKER_00: Instead of assuming you understand, create a space for them to tell you their truth.
• 2:41
  SPEAKER_00: That's where connection begins.
• 2:46
  SPEAKER_00: Segment three, healing through awareness.
• 2:50
  SPEAKER_00: Stacy also talked about how our unhealed wounds show up in subtle ways, like anger, defensiveness, or needing to be perfect.
• 3:01
  SPEAKER_00: She encourages us to ask, how old do I feel in this moment?
• 3:06
  SPEAKER_00: Because often it's not the adult who's reacting, it's the younger version of us.
• 3:13
  SPEAKER_00: Coaching tip number three.
• 3:16
  SPEAKER_00: Next time you feel triggered, pause and ask, is this reaction about the present or the past?
• 3:24
  SPEAKER_00: What would my healed self say or do instead?
• 3:29
  SPEAKER_00: That small shift in awareness can change everything.
• 3:34
  SPEAKER_00: Segment four, reclaiming your story.
• 3:38
  SPEAKER_00: Stacy's courage to own her own story, even the painful parts, reminds us that truth is the key to freedom.
• 3:47
  SPEAKER_00: When you tell your story, you reclaim your power.
• 3:50
  SPEAKER_00: You stop hiding, and you start healing.
• 3:54
  SPEAKER_00: Your challenge this week?
• 3:57
  SPEAKER_00: Look at an old photo of yourself, maybe as a child or a teen, and ask her, what do you need from me today?
• 4:06
  SPEAKER_00: Then do one small thing to honor her.
• 4:09
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe it's journaling, taking a walk, or speaking to yourself with gentleness.
• 4:16
  SPEAKER_00: Remember, your story matters.
• 4:19
  SPEAKER_00: Your past may have shaped you, but it does not define you.
• 4:24
  SPEAKER_00: Healing begins when you give yourself permission to listen to your own voice, your own truth, and your own story.
• 4:34
  SPEAKER_00: You may be bent, but you are never broken.
• 4:39
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you for listening to today's episode of Bent Not Broken.
• 4:44
  SPEAKER_00: I hope that this episode reminded you that even through life's toughest moments, you are bent, not broken.
• 4:52
  SPEAKER_00: If this message inspired you, please share, rate, review, and subscribe, as it helps us reach more women who are ready to rise and rebuild.
• 5:04
  SPEAKER_00: And until next time, keep living bold and walking in your purpose.