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What If God Is Waiting for You to Do Your Part? Lessons from Nehemiah · Still Well Podcast

• 0:32
  SPEAKER_00: Hello, my friend, and welcome to another episode of Stillwell Podcast.
• 0:37
  SPEAKER_00: I'm your host, Brooke Stillwell, and thank you so much for joining me again for another conversation about all things midlife, living our best life now that the kids are growing up, some of them moved out, some of them still at home, and just making the next phase of life the most amazing phase of life, right?
• 0:54
  SPEAKER_00: To set everything ahead of us and just building that next chapter with a lot of joy and a lot of hope and peace and seeking uh God's calling for our life.
• 1:05
  SPEAKER_00: That was a mouthful, but that's what I'm here for, and that's what I hope you guys are here for.
• 1:09
  SPEAKER_00: And I love these conversations that we've been having together.
• 1:12
  SPEAKER_00: Last week we talked about physical health.
• 1:15
  SPEAKER_00: We were talking about sleep and how important that is and why you need to prioritize it.
• 1:20
  SPEAKER_00: And this week we're taking a little turn.
• 1:23
  SPEAKER_00: Again, I'm trying to talk to you guys in real time, and I'm going through the week and thinking, like, what is it?
• 1:29
  SPEAKER_00: Like, sometimes things I just know exactly what I want to talk about, and sometimes it's a little bit tougher.
• 1:34
  SPEAKER_00: And this week, I was kind of like, I didn't know, I wasn't sure, I wasn't sure what we were gonna talk about.
• 1:38
  SPEAKER_00: I was actually in a little bit of a mode of like, oh my gosh, like, am I gonna start running out of things to say, or they're gonna get bored with me?
• 1:45
  SPEAKER_00: Like, all this just like negative talk that you just have to ignore.
• 1:49
  SPEAKER_00: And then it hit me.
• 1:51
  SPEAKER_00: I've been reading the Bible recap, as I have mentioned to you guys, and I'm so excited because tomorrow we start with the New Testament, and I keep saying to myself, Jesus is coming, Jesus is coming.
• 2:02
  SPEAKER_00: October 1st is when it starts.
• 2:04
  SPEAKER_00: So, by the way, side note, if you haven't been doing the Bible recap, you haven't been reading through the Bible this year, but you think it might be fun or are interested in jumping into the New Testament and reading all of it by the end of the year.
• 2:18
  SPEAKER_00: Now is a great time to join in.
• 2:20
  SPEAKER_00: It just started October 1st.
• 2:21
  SPEAKER_00: By the time you hear this podcast, I think I'm recording about two weeks out, so it might be a little further in, but there's no time like the present to jump in and do that.
• 2:30
  SPEAKER_00: So that is a total side note.
• 2:32
  SPEAKER_00: What I wanted to talk to you about was one of the books we were just in.
• 2:36
  SPEAKER_00: And the Bible recap is in chronological order, which means it doesn't go necessarily with the way it's laid out in the Bible.
• 2:42
  SPEAKER_00: They try to present it to you and have you follow a schedule that is more with like history and timeline.
• 2:48
  SPEAKER_00: And so we were in one of my favorite books, Nehemiah.
• 2:53
  SPEAKER_00: And you might go, why in the world is one of your favorite books Nehemiah?
• 2:57
  SPEAKER_00: Or you might be thinking, Is Nehemiah even a book?
• 3:00
  SPEAKER_00: It's probably a lesser-known book, so I get it.
• 3:03
  SPEAKER_00: And I remember years ago at my old church in a different town that I lived in, the youth pastor had approached me and said that she was doing this segment every Sunday night where she would have somebody from the church come in and talk to the kids about something that was going on in their life, like a struggle, what their favorite book of the Bible was, and just kind of talk through how it has helped has helped them.
• 3:26
  SPEAKER_00: And I remember telling her that I was going to be talking about Nehemiah.
• 3:30
  SPEAKER_00: And I remember her being like a little flabbergasted.
• 3:33
  SPEAKER_00: I think she was kind of like, really?
• 3:35
  SPEAKER_00: Nehemiah?
• 3:36
  SPEAKER_00: Like all the books that you had to choose from, and it would be Nehemiah.
• 3:39
  SPEAKER_00: So yeah, so I'm used to that kind of response.
• 3:42
  SPEAKER_00: And, you know, I've been reading through the Bible, and there are so many, like, there's nothing like the gospels, there's nothing like reading the actual word of Jesus.
• 3:49
  SPEAKER_00: I love all of the New Testament.
• 3:51
  SPEAKER_00: We're actually in my church right now.
• 3:53
  SPEAKER_00: We've been in Acts for a really long time.
• 3:55
  SPEAKER_00: I love the Acts of the Apostles.
• 3:56
  SPEAKER_00: So there's so much good in the Bible, but I really genuinely love Nehemiah.
• 4:01
  SPEAKER_00: And Nehemiah, if you don't know, it's in the Old Testament, and it's a book that comes right before Esther.
• 4:06
  SPEAKER_00: And let me just set the stage for you for it a little bit.
• 4:09
  SPEAKER_00: This is not gonna be like, just bear with me, because this is not gonna be a full-on Bible teaching, and I'm not a theologian, I'm not a Bible scholar.
• 4:17
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just speaking again from what I've read and what I've picked up and what has meant something to me.
• 4:22
  SPEAKER_00: And we are gonna get to another place and apply this all to midlife.
• 4:25
  SPEAKER_00: So just bear with me, but I want to set the stage for Nehemiah.
• 4:28
  SPEAKER_00: So Nehemiah was a cupbearer in Babylon.
• 4:32
  SPEAKER_00: The Israelites have been exiled, they've been moved out of the promised land, Samaria first, northern Israel or Israel itself, and then Judah second, and the temple has been burned down, and all the exiles moved because they had not kept their covenant with God.
• 4:46
  SPEAKER_00: And so what we have here now is that a group of exiles had already been back and they had built the temple, but then through word of mouth and other people coming back to Babylon where Nehemiah was still in exile, he had heard that while the temple was rebuilt, Jerusalem was sort of still in rubble and the wall around it was just a mess.
• 5:09
  SPEAKER_00: And Nehemiah was a cupbearer, which means he had to protect the king by checking the drinks before he drank them for poison.
• 5:16
  SPEAKER_00: That's just a side note.
• 5:17
  SPEAKER_00: Not a job I would ever want to have in life, right?
• 5:19
  SPEAKER_00: Talk about geez, I'm anxious enough on my own, let alone having to worry about drinking poison in a cup.
• 5:25
  SPEAKER_00: Ugh anyway, and so it just it broke Nehemiah's heart.
• 5:28
  SPEAKER_00: And he's like, have to do something about this.
• 5:30
  SPEAKER_00: And so he requested with the king to be able to go back to Israel for a period of time.
• 5:35
  SPEAKER_00: He ended up being there, I think like 12 years, which probably longer than he anticipated, but he wanted to go back and he wanted to rebuild the wall around Jerusalem so that it could be protected and so that it could be built back up again.
• 5:47
  SPEAKER_00: And so, because the hand of God was with him, um, the king at the time gave him his blessing and also helped to fund the whole rebuilding of the wall.
• 5:56
  SPEAKER_00: So now you're probably going, okay, why do you love this book?
• 6:01
  SPEAKER_00: What does it have to do with anything?
• 6:03
  SPEAKER_00: Well, the first time that I read Nehemiah's, it's this is going back years.
• 6:07
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, probably not quite, what am I, 50?
• 6:09
  SPEAKER_00: Probably not quite 20 years, but maybe 15 years or a little more.
• 6:13
  SPEAKER_00: And I was in a really bad place then, dealing with, as you all know, like anxiety.
• 6:19
  SPEAKER_00: And by that time, I think I somebody had told me that what I was dealing with is probably OCD and obsessive thoughts.
• 6:26
  SPEAKER_00: And so I was really dealing with a lot.
• 6:28
  SPEAKER_00: My kids were really young.
• 6:29
  SPEAKER_00: It was just, you know, not a lot of sleep and just kind of really struggling.
• 6:33
  SPEAKER_00: And I remember like praying and and praying like constantly and incessantly for healing and for help and for God to lighten my note load and to heal me of the thoughts and the anxiety and all of these things, and just often feeling like like God wasn't listening.
• 6:50
  SPEAKER_00: And just I was in a bad way.
• 6:52
  SPEAKER_00: And during that period of time, I was in the Bible and I just happened.
• 6:56
  SPEAKER_00: It wasn't like I picked to read Nehemiah.
• 6:58
  SPEAKER_00: I think that was probably back then I would read the Bible just starting with Genesis and through.
• 7:02
  SPEAKER_00: So I might have just happened on a Nehemiah.
• 7:04
  SPEAKER_00: And it was my first experience with the book.
• 7:06
  SPEAKER_00: And my takeaway when I read that book was, oh my goodness, here's this man that has such a daunting task to rebuild this wall and do this big thing with like relying on the king for help, with just violence all around him, two people at least, if not more, maybe three, like people who were in charge of other areas who did not like him and who wanted his harm.
• 7:30
  SPEAKER_00: Lots of people on the surrounding areas that did not want Jerusalem built back up because they viewed it as a threat.
• 7:36
  SPEAKER_00: So he's got all of these threats and actually real fears, and then people lying to him and talking behind his back.
• 7:43
  SPEAKER_00: And here he is doing his job.
• 7:46
  SPEAKER_00: And to me, it was such a cool thing to see how Nehemiah approached it.
• 7:51
  SPEAKER_00: And this is where I think it applies to our life and why it's so important and why it spoke to me back then.
• 7:56
  SPEAKER_00: It's because Nehemiah didn't just sit around and pray to God and wait for things to be done and hope for the best.
• 8:04
  SPEAKER_00: He did all of those things.
• 8:05
  SPEAKER_00: He prayed to God regularly, he prayed for God's hand to be upon him, he prayed for God to remember him, he prayed for his protection, he prayed for strength, he prayed for all of these things.
• 8:14
  SPEAKER_00: But then Nehemiah went boots on the ground and got the job done.
• 8:18
  SPEAKER_00: Like he did his part.
• 8:20
  SPEAKER_00: He was a good steward with a task at hand.
• 8:23
  SPEAKER_00: And not only that, but he made an extensive plan for everybody around him to help.
• 8:29
  SPEAKER_00: He had like order, he had like, if you read the book, there's there's a lot of like genealogy and stuff like that, which is kind of tough to get through, a lot of names that are very hard to pronounce.
• 8:41
  SPEAKER_00: But also, like you see how organized he was and how he set this plan in place, trusting God and praying to God, but also doing his part and setting up leadership and establishing like which sections of which wall should be done by whom and who was gonna do what.
• 8:57
  SPEAKER_00: And it was just so beautiful for me to see that all play out.
• 9:01
  SPEAKER_00: And I just realized, like, as I was reading it, and even this week, as I was going back to it again today, like the beauty of doing our part in life to make sure what we're called to do gets done, but also relying on God.
• 9:16
  SPEAKER_00: Like the two go hand in hand.
• 9:18
  SPEAKER_00: And for me, years ago when I was going through that dark period, it was just like it was such a message to me.
• 9:25
  SPEAKER_00: I felt like I'm praying.
• 9:26
  SPEAKER_00: I knew God heard my prayers, but I couldn't also just sit around and wait for like a snap of the finger and to feel better and be healed.
• 9:34
  SPEAKER_00: And believe me, I know that God can do that, and I know that he has done that.
• 9:37
  SPEAKER_00: I've actually seen that happen with family members, miraculous healing.
• 9:42
  SPEAKER_00: Like God, he's bigger than any problem that we face, any sickness we face, whether that's emotional or mental or physical, he's bigger and he can do it in a second.
• 9:50
  SPEAKER_00: But sometimes he wants us to do our part.
• 9:53
  SPEAKER_00: And as I was reading Nehemiah, I realized, okay, Brooke, you have to step up and do your part in this.
• 9:58
  SPEAKER_00: You have to start to figure out what steps you can take in your life to help yourself and to help start down the healing path.
• 10:07
  SPEAKER_00: And that's where I say, like, that was so powerful for me.
• 10:11
  SPEAKER_00: And you know, there's just a there's a couple verses that I would love if you will indulge me.
• 10:15
  SPEAKER_00: I have my Bible here that I just wanted to specifically read because they were just like so important to me.
• 10:20
  SPEAKER_00: And even this, when I go back and read it over, even just this last time, it's so good.
• 10:25
  SPEAKER_00: Like Nehemiah 4.9, he says, but we prayed to our God and posted a guard day and night to meet this threat.
• 10:32
  SPEAKER_00: So even in that, just that one sentence, we prayed to our God, but we also, or and we posted a guard day and night to meet this threat.
• 10:41
  SPEAKER_00: So they were threatened, they were being threatened by the people around them.
• 10:44
  SPEAKER_00: And for us, that could look like so many different things: fears of sickness, fears of aging, fear of what's going on with our children, right?
• 10:52
  SPEAKER_00: So we pray about those things.
• 10:54
  SPEAKER_00: We pray about those fears and we pray about those very real struggles that might be going on in our life.
• 11:00
  SPEAKER_00: But then watch what he said right after that.
• 11:02
  SPEAKER_00: They also posted a guard day and night to meet the threat.
• 11:05
  SPEAKER_00: So to me, I read that and I go, okay, I'm praying to God for everything that's on my heart and for all the fears and for the real like struggles or dangers that might be in front of me.
• 11:16
  SPEAKER_00: But man, I'm also doing my part.
• 11:18
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm also gonna show up and maybe it's not posting a guard at my house because my house, I live in a safe area, but you know, maybe that looks like, okay, I'm gonna pray to God to get through this and to restore my energy and to feel like my best self.
• 11:33
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm going to start eating cleaner.
• 11:36
  SPEAKER_00: I'm going to start watching what I eat.
• 11:38
  SPEAKER_00: I'm going to exercise self-control in the lifestyle choices that I make so that I can show up as my best self, so that I can start to nip some of these emotional things in the bud.
• 11:48
  SPEAKER_00: Because I will tell you for me, what I found years ago and what still applies to my life is that when I eat garbage or I'm treating my body like garbage, I inevitably almost always feel like garbage.
• 12:00
  SPEAKER_00: And so for me, as somebody who is already struggling with anxiety, some OCD back then, even a little bit of depression here and there, inevitably, when I was eating garbage that inflamed my body, it almost always inflamed my brain, and I felt worse.
• 12:13
  SPEAKER_00: So that to me, I just that is such a message for me in this book.
• 12:17
  SPEAKER_00: Other parts that I really loved.
• 12:19
  SPEAKER_00: Nehemiah, again, this is Nehemiah 4.
• 12:21
  SPEAKER_00: And actually, it's so funny.
• 12:23
  SPEAKER_00: If you guys read the Bible, have you ever noticed that like you could read it so many times, like a certain passage, and it's the exact same passage, and like a couple years later, you see something that you never saw before.
• 12:34
  SPEAKER_00: So that's what happened to me this time when I read it.
• 12:37
  SPEAKER_00: And this is from Nehemiah 4, 17, where he says, Those who carried materials did their work with one hand and held a weapon in the other.
• 12:46
  SPEAKER_00: And he's talking about the people building the wall.
• 12:49
  SPEAKER_00: So they're building the wall in the midst of you know, danger and things going on around them.
• 12:54
  SPEAKER_00: And with one hand, they're doing the work and doing what they needed to do, and with the other hand, they're holding a weapon for protection.
• 13:01
  SPEAKER_00: And I love that too, you know.
• 13:03
  SPEAKER_00: And on top of that, remember, they're also praying to God.
• 13:06
  SPEAKER_00: So, you know, to me in our life, that applies to like do what you need to do, put the action step in place, step up and take accountability and be a good steward.
• 13:16
  SPEAKER_00: But man, also make sure you're praying and involving God in everything you do, and also be really awake and aware and hold that sword, that breastplate of righteousness.
• 13:26
  SPEAKER_00: I think it's in Ephesians, it is talked about where we have to be on high alert for the enemy, you know, because there is an enemy that wants to just bring us down and pull us away from God.
• 13:35
  SPEAKER_00: So we have to be working in our own lives, we have to be praying to God, but we also have to be alert and prepared for things that could come up.
• 13:44
  SPEAKER_00: And I hope that you all grasp that.
• 13:47
  SPEAKER_00: I hope that makes sense to you.
• 13:48
  SPEAKER_00: And you may read this and and note something different, but that's just what really spoke to me.
• 13:53
  SPEAKER_00: Like there are things that we have to be aware of in this life.
• 13:56
  SPEAKER_00: There are, you know, it could be, it could be something from the enemy.
• 14:00
  SPEAKER_00: It could be somebody that you know that a family member or a friend that has a tendency to want to hold you back or, you know, be a naysayer or tell you like maybe you can't do this.
• 14:09
  SPEAKER_00: You have to be prepared for those types of attacks too and wield your sword.
• 14:13
  SPEAKER_00: Be ready for that because the work that you're doing, whatever it is, whatever God is calling you to, whatever that purpose is, or whether that's just you being healthy and vibrant and productive to live the calling that God has on your life or to show up and serve and love others well, you have to be doing your part, but you also have to be prepared for any attack that comes your way.
• 14:35
  SPEAKER_00: Even the smallest things, we have to go into these things eyes wide open, and I think, and not be not be naive, if that makes sense.
• 14:43
  SPEAKER_00: And so I love that too.
• 14:44
  SPEAKER_00: And then this is probably a couple of my favorites, others.
• 14:49
  SPEAKER_00: This one and then the next one I'll read to is my favorite, but this is Nehemiah 6, 8, and this is Nehemiah talking after one of the people that he was struggling with was kind of trying to tell him that there was a plot against him and he needed to come into the temple to protect himself and be safe.
• 15:08
  SPEAKER_00: But Nehemiah knew that he couldn't go into the temple, it wasn't allowed because he wasn't a priest or a Levite.
• 15:13
  SPEAKER_00: And so he says back in Nehemiah 6, 8, nothing like what you are saying is happening.
• 15:18
  SPEAKER_00: You are just making it up out of your head.
• 15:21
  SPEAKER_00: And then on in 9, they were all trying to frighten us, thinking their hands will get too weak for the work and it will not be completed.
• 15:29
  SPEAKER_00: And, you know, I think we have to be careful of those things.
• 15:32
  SPEAKER_00: Again, we have to be careful for like a things that we make up in our own head that get us down, right?
• 15:39
  SPEAKER_00: Negative self-talk, negative lies that are in our minds that we're believing.
• 15:43
  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes we're our own worst enemy, I think, right?
• 15:46
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, I know I can be.
• 15:48
  SPEAKER_00: I can be, I'm so quick to believe the worst.
• 15:50
  SPEAKER_00: I'm so quick to tell myself that I'm not capable, that it's not gonna be right, that whatever I'm trying to do for somebody, they're not gonna like, you know, and so that's one thing.
• 16:00
  SPEAKER_00: Like, you have to remember, like, it those things are not, don't believe those lies.
• 16:04
  SPEAKER_00: God has good for your life.
• 16:06
  SPEAKER_00: And maybe it's the lie of like, you know, my kids are out of the house and I'm getting older, I'm on the downswing, I'm not relevant anymore.
• 16:13
  SPEAKER_00: I'm not capable of doing this thing, I'm not capable of getting back in the gym and getting strong.
• 16:18
  SPEAKER_00: I'm not capable of changing my life or putting, you know, this next phase, making it as good as possible.
• 16:25
  SPEAKER_00: I'm not capable of that.
• 16:26
  SPEAKER_00: And you have to remember, like, God wants the best for you.
• 16:29
  SPEAKER_00: And those are a lie.
• 16:30
  SPEAKER_00: That's something that's just being made up in your head.
• 16:33
  SPEAKER_00: And don't you listen to it.
• 16:35
  SPEAKER_00: Easy for me to say when I've listened it to myself so much.
• 16:38
  SPEAKER_00: So, but please, like, take it from me.
• 16:41
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm reminding myself as I'm telling you, like, we have to put those negative thoughts aside so we can show up as our best selves in this phase of life and live really vibrantly.
• 16:51
  SPEAKER_00: It's just so important.
• 16:53
  SPEAKER_00: And then, you know, shortly after, same thing in verse nine, um, he says, But I prayed, now strengthen my hands.
• 17:00
  SPEAKER_00: And I just for me, that's just such a beautiful illustration of like remembering like a lot of this stuff is it's being made up in your head.
• 17:10
  SPEAKER_00: Put it aside, it's not real, and then pray, Lord, strengthen my hands, strengthen me.
• 17:14
  SPEAKER_00: Like, one of my prayers is always has especially more recently, has been, Lord, help me to see things the way they really are, not the way they appear to be.
• 17:23
  SPEAKER_00: Lord, take my mind and give me your mind.
• 17:25
  SPEAKER_00: And it's so important.
• 17:26
  SPEAKER_00: And it's just to me, is such an important thing.
• 17:29
  SPEAKER_00: And I want to remind you too, as I talked about, you know, in verse eight, nothing like what you were saying is happening.
• 17:34
  SPEAKER_00: We do that to ourselves, we self-sabotage, right?
• 17:37
  SPEAKER_00: But unfortunately, again, sometimes the people that are close to us, sometimes it's friends, sometimes it's family members, sometimes it's people that don't know us well, sometimes it's people with the best intentions and they think they're protecting us, but they're just speaking negativity to us.
• 17:52
  SPEAKER_00: Like, oh, I don't know if you're, you know, are you sure you can do that?
• 17:55
  SPEAKER_00: Why would you waste your time doing that?
• 17:57
  SPEAKER_00: Isn't it time to relax now?
• 17:58
  SPEAKER_00: Your kids are older.
• 17:59
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know.
• 18:00
  SPEAKER_00: Are you gonna get injured?
• 18:01
  SPEAKER_00: You know, just whatever that might be, remember like those things, you don't have to accept those things as truth.
• 18:09
  SPEAKER_00: Go back to God, go back to his word, go and spend time in him and talk to him and ask him, How do you see this, Lord?
• 18:16
  SPEAKER_00: What is it that you want from me?
• 18:18
  SPEAKER_00: Because it's just so easy to get led astray.
• 18:20
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, the number of times that I've done that to myself, either in my own self-talk or taking advice from people that maybe wasn't great advice, or even just because somebody that I don't even know.
• 18:32
  SPEAKER_00: I was worried about what they said or what they were gonna say or what their opinion was.
• 18:36
  SPEAKER_00: It's crazy.
• 18:37
  SPEAKER_00: Like we have to put this stuff off so that we can show up and be obedient to God and to the calling that's on our life.
• 18:44
  SPEAKER_00: Like, you guys, if we have breath in our lungs, we have something to do, we have something to give back.
• 18:50
  SPEAKER_00: There are needs that need to be met, and we are the people to do it.
• 18:53
  SPEAKER_00: We have to step up and step into, I think, our power.
• 18:58
  SPEAKER_00: And we won't be able to fully do that if we don't again stay in prayer, refuse to believe the self-sabotage or negative talk from other people or negative opinions, and we're not doing our part and praying and believing.
• 19:12
  SPEAKER_00: It's just I probably am like sounding like a little kooky right now, but this book gets me excited.
• 19:17
  SPEAKER_00: It gets me excited for life, it gets me excited for what could be.
• 19:21
  SPEAKER_00: And it's just to me is such an important message.
• 19:23
  SPEAKER_00: I remember once this is going back when I still lived in Pennsylvania, and here's an example.
• 19:29
  SPEAKER_00: I had a guy come to our house and he was a painter.
• 19:32
  SPEAKER_00: He was painting our house, and I was talking to him, he was such a nice guy, and he was a Christian, and we got to talking about faith and things like that.
• 19:39
  SPEAKER_00: And come to find out that he had taken uh some time off from work because he had had a heart attack and it was pretty severe, and he had been through like you know, he had surgery, he had been through physical therapy, he was doing better and he was back at work.
• 19:53
  SPEAKER_00: And basically what he said to me was, I'm just praying every day and putting it all into God's hands and then, you know, living my life the way I want.
• 20:01
  SPEAKER_00: And I was like, wow, I said to him, you know, I think that's amazing, like your faith and trust in God, yeah, that's so important and the prayer is so important.
• 20:10
  SPEAKER_00: But like you can't, at least my opinion is in a situation like that, God wants you to be a good steward.
• 20:16
  SPEAKER_00: He wants us to do our part in our life.
• 20:19
  SPEAKER_00: Like he's gonna work in the supernatural, but we have to work in the natural.
• 20:22
  SPEAKER_00: And for him, I said to him, you know, you can pray and give that all to God, but also like what about the things you can do?
• 20:28
  SPEAKER_00: What about starting to be more active and move your body?
• 20:31
  SPEAKER_00: What about eating the right healthy foods, making better choices for yourself, you know?
• 20:36
  SPEAKER_00: So that's where I think this book gets me because, you know, so much of Stillwell Mom, I talk about this over and over again, is about stewardship.
• 20:44
  SPEAKER_00: It's not the striving, right?
• 20:46
  SPEAKER_00: We can choose stewardship over striving.
• 20:48
  SPEAKER_00: We don't have to do it all, but we also are called to be good stewards.
• 20:53
  SPEAKER_00: And that's what I love about Nehemiah is just this beautiful juxtaposition of trusting in God and believing Him to answer prayer and to show up big for us and praying, but also then doing our part, not just sitting back and waiting.
• 21:07
  SPEAKER_00: And I just love that.
• 21:09
  SPEAKER_00: And here's my favorite.
• 21:10
  SPEAKER_00: This is my favorite verse here um in Nehemiah.
• 21:13
  SPEAKER_00: Nehemiah 6, 3.
• 21:15
  SPEAKER_00: So I sent messengers to them with this reply I am carrying on a great project and cannot go down.
• 21:21
  SPEAKER_00: Why should the work stop while I leave it and go down to you?
• 21:24
  SPEAKER_00: Now that might sound really out of context, but what was happening there is some, these these people that were trying to stop the work, they had sent messengers to Nehemiah and asked him to come meet them in the village.
• 21:36
  SPEAKER_00: They needed to talk, and he knew that they had plans to harm him.
• 21:40
  SPEAKER_00: And so his answer was, I'm sorry guys, but I'm working on something hard and I can't stop.
• 21:45
  SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna see this thing through.
• 21:47
  SPEAKER_00: And there again, like, whether it's our own self-sabotage, whether it's negative things we're listening to, whether it's somebody else trying to pull us down, maybe it's just circumstances that are getting in our way, struggles because things come up.
• 21:59
  SPEAKER_00: Like I find very often when I'm really close to doing the thing that needs to be done or where I'm supposed to be headed, something pops up that's trying to like get me off track.
• 22:09
  SPEAKER_00: And in those moments, we have to remind ourselves we're doing something good.
• 22:12
  SPEAKER_00: Like the days that you don't feel like getting in the gym because you didn't have a great night's sleep, or you're just feeling a little tired, or you know, you haven't heard from your child, so you're feeling bad, you're feeling bad about maybe sad about not hearing from them and just like you don't want to move, or you don't want to make healthy choices, those are the times where you have to remind yourself you are working on.
• 22:32
  SPEAKER_00: On something good for yourself.
• 22:34
  SPEAKER_00: Your life matters.
• 22:35
  SPEAKER_00: You want to make the most of midlife and you keep going.
• 22:38
  SPEAKER_00: You don't come down from that work.
• 22:40
  SPEAKER_00: Now, I'm not saying we don't ever take a rest or we don't ever give ourselves a break.
• 22:43
  SPEAKER_00: That's silly, too.
• 22:44
  SPEAKER_00: There's time for that, and there's time to feel our feelings, but really, like we have to, we have to keep going.
• 22:50
  SPEAKER_00: We have to move forward.
• 22:53
  SPEAKER_00: And we have to, in the midst of trusting and believing, doing our part.
• 22:58
  SPEAKER_00: And the really, really cool thing about Nehemiah, I think, is that they did this work.
• 23:02
  SPEAKER_00: They worked so hard and they prayed so much and they believed.
• 23:06
  SPEAKER_00: And you know, they were working with one hand and holding their weapons with the other hand.
• 23:10
  SPEAKER_00: And man, they did their work, but God used that work, God used that faithfulness for them and them showing up and doing the work with their tools in one hand and the sword in the other.
• 23:21
  SPEAKER_00: And he took what they could do and what they were doing in the natural and made it miraculous because that wall around the whole entire city of Jerusalem ended up being built.
• 23:30
  SPEAKER_00: And I think it was like, don't quote me on this, but it was like 52 days.
• 23:34
  SPEAKER_00: An amount of time that was like, imagine at that time where there's no bulldozers, there's no like big equipment, there's no cranes, there's just people there moving, moving apart all this rubble and dirt, and then putting it all back together.
• 23:47
  SPEAKER_00: And you guys, this wall was like huge, and it was around the whole city.
• 23:51
  SPEAKER_00: And to accomplish that in that short of a period of time, that was nothing short of miraculous.
• 23:57
  SPEAKER_00: But they had to do their part and they had to show up and they had to be willing.
• 24:01
  SPEAKER_00: That's the thing.
• 24:02
  SPEAKER_00: Like, we have to be willing to go where God calls us.
• 24:05
  SPEAKER_00: We have to be willing to step up and do our part.
• 24:10
  SPEAKER_00: And again, like we all have a part to play in life, right?
• 24:13
  SPEAKER_00: And I know like God, we have to be God's hands and feet.
• 24:16
  SPEAKER_00: That's what He wants us to do.
• 24:17
  SPEAKER_00: That's what we're called to do.
• 24:18
  SPEAKER_00: So, whatever that looks like for you, I hope, I hope this is encouraging you.
• 24:22
  SPEAKER_00: And I hope, I really hope I don't sound like I'm like talking down and pointing my finger at you.
• 24:27
  SPEAKER_00: That's not my intent at all.
• 24:28
  SPEAKER_00: It's just to give us hope and encouragement, and just because I feel so encouraged by this, and I really hope that you will too.
• 24:35
  SPEAKER_00: Now, the negative to this for me, and by the way, it was so cool later on, like as you just go through this book, they once they dedicated the wall and you know, there was there was singing and joyfulness and just like turning their hearts back to God after the work and praising him and like feasts and celebrations, and just you know, don't discount the importance of that too.
• 24:58
  SPEAKER_00: Don't discount the importance of gratitude to God and thanking him when something amazing is worked out in your life.
• 25:05
  SPEAKER_00: Don't discount like he wants us to celebrate the wins.
• 25:09
  SPEAKER_00: Don't discount those things and make sure you are doing that.
• 25:11
  SPEAKER_00: Here's another line, Nehemiah 8, and you probably have heard this.
• 25:15
  SPEAKER_00: This is a little more probably well known, but Nehemiah 8.10.
• 25:19
  SPEAKER_00: Um, do not grieve, for the joy of the Lord is your strength.
• 25:23
  SPEAKER_00: The joy of the Lord is your strength.
• 25:25
  SPEAKER_00: I love that.
• 25:26
  SPEAKER_00: It's such a good reminder for us, I think.
• 25:29
  SPEAKER_00: So let me just give you like the negative spin on this, because not on the Bible, because there's nothing negative about the Bible.
• 25:34
  SPEAKER_00: But what ended up happening to me, um, and maybe it's a little bit of the obsessiveness, I don't know, but I kind of went too far.
• 25:42
  SPEAKER_00: This is the thing, like there's this balance, right?
• 25:45
  SPEAKER_00: And this dance between putting God first in everything and trusting him and believing him and putting it all in his hands and doing our part.
• 25:54
  SPEAKER_00: But what happened to me was I was just so wanting a quick fix.
• 25:58
  SPEAKER_00: I was so afraid of feeling the way that I did that I went way too far into I can fix this myself.
• 26:05
  SPEAKER_00: Way too far.
• 26:05
  SPEAKER_00: And that ended up looking like for me, like a lot of like self-help and self-actualization and just a lot of what I find now, and I'm only you guys really learning this like in the last year and a half, as I've been spending more time with the Lord and in prayer, is that I've got so into just making a way for myself and doing it myself and trying to figure my own self out that I kind of not that I wasn't still loving God, not that I ever turned my back, but like that work I was doing became an idol.
• 26:37
  SPEAKER_00: And I put way too much stock in that and not enough stock in trusting him and taking time to ask him to transform my mind and to give him my thoughts and to ask him, you know, for his presence and for his holy spirit.
• 26:50
  SPEAKER_00: So I do think there's a fine line.
• 26:52
  SPEAKER_00: And there's nothing wrong with this is just my opinion, wanting to do better and be better.
• 26:57
  SPEAKER_00: But I also think like what like self, for example, self-actualization, what is that even like what actualizing self on?
• 27:05
  SPEAKER_00: I used to be, if you go back and look at some of my old social media, I used to be all over this stuff.
• 27:09
  SPEAKER_00: But to me now it's like I can't figure out anything on my own.
• 27:14
  SPEAKER_00: I can't, and certainly if I want to know myself better, the best way for me to do that is by connecting to God and speaking to him, not trying to do all these well exercises.
• 27:24
  SPEAKER_00: And I just think that in today's day and age, there's so much about self-help and self-growth and self-actualization and manifestation.
• 27:33
  SPEAKER_00: Like we have to be really, really careful, you guys.
• 27:36
  SPEAKER_00: Really careful that we don't go down the path of making ourselves our own gods or putting idols before him and not going to him first.
• 27:43
  SPEAKER_00: So I just want to give a little bit of caution there because you know that's a real thing too.
• 27:49
  SPEAKER_00: So when I talk to you about Nehemiah and us having to do our parts, remember that God always comes first.
• 27:54
  SPEAKER_00: And I I want to tie this back a little bit because it's October.
• 27:58
  SPEAKER_00: And this is kind of um, and we're gonna wrap up, but I just want to mention this too.
• 28:02
  SPEAKER_00: It's October, and so we're heading into the last quarter of the year, the last three months.
• 28:07
  SPEAKER_00: And I've been doing for several years this like last 90 days.
• 28:11
  SPEAKER_00: So I have every year I do a goals.
• 28:14
  SPEAKER_00: If you're watching on YouTube, you'll see this, my little goals, my mind map.
• 28:18
  SPEAKER_00: And then this time of year around October, I go back through everything with a fine tooth comb and I check off the things that have I've already done.
• 28:28
  SPEAKER_00: I mark off the things that I know that I'm not going to complete this year that I no longer want to complete.
• 28:33
  SPEAKER_00: And then I start to take the things that didn't get done and move them into next year's goals.
• 28:38
  SPEAKER_00: So as I'm ramping up and wanting to get like action steps in place for the things that I really want to get done this year that I was hoping to do, I'm also starting to plan ahead for the next year.
• 28:49
  SPEAKER_00: And all of that is very important.
• 28:50
  SPEAKER_00: And maybe we should have a podcast episode about that because I do think it's important to plan out things.
• 28:57
  SPEAKER_00: You have a much better chance of accomplishing what you want to do.
• 29:00
  SPEAKER_00: And Nehemiah did a lot of that.
• 29:02
  SPEAKER_00: He did a lot of planning.
• 29:03
  SPEAKER_00: But at the same time, I spent way too many years making this like my end all be all, this map, and my goals and putting so much stock and emphasis and everything into this.
• 29:14
  SPEAKER_00: Like this was almost like my Bible.
• 29:17
  SPEAKER_00: And all that to say, while I will still do this and I'm going to do this, and I'm going to be sitting down to do this in the next week or two, you can bet now, maybe the first time in a while, I'm going to be praying to God first and asking him, Lord, walk with me through this.
• 29:31
  SPEAKER_00: What is it that you have for me?
• 29:32
  SPEAKER_00: What is on my mind that is from you, Lord?
• 29:35
  SPEAKER_00: Show me with your Holy Spirit like where I should be going.
• 29:37
  SPEAKER_00: I want you at the center of all of this.
• 29:39
  SPEAKER_00: That's just, it just changes everything.
• 29:42
  SPEAKER_00: It changes everything because the best place for us to be is in his will, not our own.
• 29:47
  SPEAKER_00: His plan for our life is the best plan.
• 29:49
  SPEAKER_00: And so when we can do that and give that over to him, and you know, this goals map, I would want to talk to you about this at some time.
• 29:55
  SPEAKER_00: But there's a spirituality section.
• 29:57
  SPEAKER_00: So how am I drawing closer to God and building faith, contribution?
• 30:01
  SPEAKER_00: How am I giving back and serving others well?
• 30:03
  SPEAKER_00: So there's a lot on here.
• 30:04
  SPEAKER_00: But again, none of this matters if we're not putting God at the forefront.
• 30:08
  SPEAKER_00: And I started to lose sight of that.
• 30:10
  SPEAKER_00: And it probably caused me a lot of lost time, a lot of lost time that I can't get back.
• 30:16
  SPEAKER_00: But, you know, you can't always change the past, but we can do better moving forward.
• 30:19
  SPEAKER_00: And so that's the hope that I hold on to.
• 30:21
  SPEAKER_00: That, you know, we learn from our mistakes, we learn from the past.
• 30:25
  SPEAKER_00: Our sin and our struggle can show us our mistakes when we take it to God and repent and ask forgiveness, and then choose a better way.
• 30:32
  SPEAKER_00: And and fortunately, we're so blessed that we have a God that is super compassionate and merciful and always there to pick us back up and show us the right way when we go off a little bit the wrong way or a lot the wrong way.
• 30:44
  SPEAKER_00: So I want to encourage you there.
• 30:46
  SPEAKER_00: I hope, I sure hope this was beneficial to you.
• 30:48
  SPEAKER_00: I love talking to you guys.
• 30:49
  SPEAKER_00: As always, remember to give me your feedback.
• 30:52
  SPEAKER_00: Let me know what you're thinking.
• 30:54
  SPEAKER_00: Let me know what you thought about this.
• 30:55
  SPEAKER_00: Let me know if you have any big plans for the rest of this year or next year.
• 30:59
  SPEAKER_00: I think we'll do a whole nother episode just maybe on this type of thing, like the setup and sort of like goals mapping and things like that.
• 31:06
  SPEAKER_00: But the email is Brooke with an E at the end at the Stillwell Mum.
• 31:11
  SPEAKER_00: Please reach out.
• 31:12
  SPEAKER_00: I love hearing from you.
• 31:13
  SPEAKER_00: I love hearing from the people that have already written to me.
• 31:16
  SPEAKER_00: I read everything, I always respond.
• 31:18
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe something that you want to talk about, I will, you know, address here because we're all most of us are dealing with the same things in this phase of life.
• 31:26
  SPEAKER_00: Remember that you can reach me and find what's going on currently with Stillwell Mom on Instagram and Facebook at thestillwell mom.
• 31:34
  SPEAKER_00: The website is thestillwellmom.com.
• 31:37
  SPEAKER_00: I'm also on YouTube if you prefer to watch.
• 31:39
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm just I'm grateful for you guys.
• 31:42
  SPEAKER_00: I'm grateful for this day.
• 31:44
  SPEAKER_00: I'm probably starting to sound cheesy, but thank you.
• 31:46
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you for showing up.
• 31:47
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you for being a regular listener.
• 31:49
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you to everyone who is rated and reviewed.
• 31:51
  SPEAKER_00: It means the world to me.
• 31:53
  SPEAKER_00: To that end, if you haven't and you're enjoying the show and would be willing to take just a moment to rate and review the podcast, it's huge for visibility and for building the community.
• 32:03
  SPEAKER_00: And certainly if something you hear you like, pass it on and share it with a friend.
• 32:07
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe it will be helpful to them too.
• 32:09
  SPEAKER_00: And just remember that you don't have to do midlife alone.
• 32:13
  SPEAKER_00: You can always choose stewardship over striving.
• 32:16
  SPEAKER_00: And you can be strong in body, steady in mind, and rooted in faith.
• 32:21
  SPEAKER_00: Until next time.