Latest / The Autistic Mile / Episode 4: Sleepless in St. Augustine
Transcript
- Jim Gaffney: It's 3 30 in the morning, another relatively sleepless night, so I figured I'd take a ride over the gym and get some running in early this morning. This is kinda par for the course. When you're autistic, you know, you a lot of people don't sleep so well. You don't need to take sleep medication. So when life gives you oranges, you go to the gym and run on the treadmill. I used to enjoy running early in the morning more when I was younger. Now the now that I'm getting older, I'm getting a little lazier. So most days I tend to run after work. get to the gym after work and I run somewhere between one hour, hour and a half, possibly two hours on a good day. depending how much time I have. So I'll have a family to get home to after work. good thing about working out in the morning is nobody's missing me. And I get to get to get to the gym, get on the treadmill, get everything done early, and then after work I can Go stay home and relax or go do some other things that, you know, that need to get done. when you have kids, when you have a home, when you have a wife, you know, it's you don't always go home and relax. Grass needs cutting, dinner needs making, things need to be done, so spending time with the kids and the granddaughter, so like to have more time when I can to do those things. So if I have trouble sleeping, I get to the gym early. Just happens naturally. Just one of those things when you're autistic. I think I never had trouble sleeping when I was younger. But as I gotten older it's in adulthood it's been an issue. even with sleep sleeping medication, doesn't always put my brain down. Brain kind of switches on at odd times. helps me get a lot done, but you know kind of adds to my burnout at some point. some days you know you're not getting as many hours sleep as you need or hope for. So but there's worse things that could happen. and I'm trying to get back in shape. Although I'm an o although I'm a marathon runner It's been eleven years since my last marathon. and it was eleven years I've, you know, put on some weight trying to get get get back in shape. So getting to the gym on a regular basis is important to me and not only my you know, my physical health but also my mental health. I I find that running has always been a good outlet for my mental health. It helps me unwind. Actually I guess some of my most productive thinking done when I'm when I'm on the treadmill and I'm kinda just in the zone. You know, the I got the music playing but everything else kind of fades to the background. and even though I enjoy the music, sometimes what I've got going on in my mind, I lose track of songs, I lose track of time. And now we're on the treadmill when I'm kinda in deep thought. You know, whether it's thinking about the podcast or thinking about work or thinking about personal life, that an hour on the treadmill can go by pretty fast. I used to run outside more, but as I've gotten older and injuries have piled up, running outside is it's not the best for my feet and my legs. So these days kinda take it easy on the treadmill. I enjoy the treadmill just keeps me on my pace. little bit more of a controlled environment. You don't have to worry about rain or or some of the other things that go along with running outside. The gym I go to is Anytime Fitness. It's only about 10 minutes from my house. Great spot. Really it's not the biggest gym in the world, but it's perfect. Great staff. Michelle the owner is is one of the nicest people to ever meet. I s it's no beginning of July now. You know, I started back at the gym in January of this year. you know, Michelle was the first person I sat down with and you know, she's she probably sees it all, you know, she's she's got people coming and going, trying to trying to stay fit and be healthy. and she's been very positive with me as far as she's always very encouraging. sometimes we all need that. You know, we don't always seek it but sometimes we get that positivity and that support naturally. that goes a long way. So I mean Michelle and her team they do a great job over at Anytime Fitness. like I said, couldn't ask for a better place. a lot of regulars in there. not much the one to socialize at the gym. I kind of get in, do my thing, get out. But I mean it is a it is a great spot and there are a lot of people that that do socialize and that's a good thing. me I'm just a little bit more regimented so but yeah so we'll this morning we'll probably put in at least an hour and a half yeah probably about about an hour and a half this morning and Probably go out a little harder this weekend, maybe put in couple two hour runs this weekend. my most recent fitness journey, about I've lost about seventy pounds so far, but I've still got a ways to go. So I was off track, as you say, as far as my health and fitness was going. kinda let it slip away with me over the last eleven years so finally back on track. you know, working on the podcast is taking a chunk of time out of my schedule so I haven't been at the gym as much but with with with where we are with the podcast and and the schedule that we're on now can get allow me to get back to the gym on a more regular basis and Can I bring bring you all along with me? we're gonna include some episodes of me running, of me hosting mini podcasts from from the treadmill. funny thing is the treadmill that I run on, I almost run on the same treadmill every day. It's whether it's luck or fate, that particular treadmill in the spot that I like it, is always almost always open. and if it's not open, a lot of times I'll wait for it to be open. If if my c schedule can accommodate it. I enjoy I'm a creature of habit, so I enjoy the view from that treadmill looking outside. it's in the perfect spot for me and it's the first treadmill I run on and kinda got a little attached to it. So Michelle doesn't know it and the rest of the members don't know it but it's it's really my treadmill. I just let them use it from time to time. They got plenty of other hours when I'm not there. So when I'm there I'm always on always on the same treadmill. So we'll be there in a couple minutes. We'll get going. Talk a little fitness, talk a little mental health. We'll where the day takes us. Alright, so we got to Anytime Fitness in one piece and just Good to know I'm not the only crazy person. There's a couple cars in the parking lot here, so have a couple other insomniacs that are working out already. so I don't think our presence there is gonna be put them out too much. looks like looks like they're busy doing their own thing, but it's good to see I'm not the only one. Alright, so here we are, Anytime Fitness. This is kind of my home, away from home, away from home. If you spend a majority of my time at work and at home, if you can't find me at one of those places, odds are you're gonna find me at anytime fitness. So we're gonna get our gonna get our run on this morning. So gonna get inside, get set up, and get to work. Alright, so got a couple of other insomniacs that are on their way in here. Set up on my usual my usual treadmill. One day they're gonna have to name this one after me because I run on it so often. But good way to start the day. I don't always have the energy to be up this early. I'm up early usually, but Not usually this early. So I'm the only runner here. Everybody else is hitting the weights right now. So we're looking get an hour and a half in ninety minutes. I won't lie to you, I was faster ten years ago. Running is like anything else, it's a perishable skill. our bodies more than our minds keep us from keep us from being faster as we get older. There are exceptions to the rule, but I'm certainly not one of them. Me, I have like a nice easy not say easy, but a nice even pace. I've had problems with my my knees and my feet over the years and you know running running as many marathons and as many endurance runs as I run. case it's tall on your on your body in general. But the feet in particular. And I wear I usually wear inserts in my f in my shoes, in my sneakers. keep them keep my foot my feet from feeling the impact but So about 20 to 25 miles in the first hour. Got a nice sweat going as you can probably see. Feeling good. Today was a day off so I had some work that my son got done with my truck. So after work I didn't have time to get to the gym. Thankfully the night before I slept through the night so back at it early again today. And we'll be back here over the weekend as well. Anytime fitness, home away from home, away from home. Like I said, an hour can go by pretty fast when you've got things going on and you're thinking about how you can just take your time enjoying a run. a time. Got some other early risers that have found their way into the gym for the last 20 to 25 minutes. For some are hitting the weights and the machines. Me, I make straight for the treadmill. So, that's my baby. So that I I kind of lose myself and find myself at the same time. I always enjoyed the continuity of running. It's a workout and you're expending a lot of energy but like I said the repetitiveness and just the emotion that kind of puts my mind at ease. You feel from working out and working hard still to me it's relaxing and even though my brain is dead working It's thinking about podcasts, it's thinking about work, it's thinking about a home and family. It's thinking about a of different things, not all at the same time. like I said, I get a lot of mental work accomplished when I'm running. It was just me and the children all the music. And now I've got you guys along for the ride to keep me company. music's always been an important part of my life. I'm not a musician. I don't play an instrument. I don't... can't carry a tune. That's my damn story. You you'll find those things that we latch onto and music has always been something throughout my childhood and to this day it's that brings me joy, comforts me. I do have the ability to listen to the same song about 20 times if it's one I really like and I'm on the treadmill. or other places, even in the car. It's put me in a place mentally where I feel good. And I just put on that rewind button, the autoplay, keep it going. It drives my life crazy. Not in the fact that I can watch the same movie over and over and over again. Same premise. There's something in the movie that... that to my mind is pleasing, it's entertaining no matter how many times I watch it. And she's asked me more than once to please turn on something else. But that's the price you pay is for letting me have the old moat. So she's a good sport though. always, always... Never complained about the music, about the movies. Movies every once in a while. Never the music. Like I said, although I'm no musician, over the last year, year and a half, I started writing the lyrics for songs. As many of you may become aware, in the Autistic Mile we have about 20 songs that are all written by me. I've written the lyrics and I use artificial intelligence, AI, to create the music and vocals that complement my lyrics. My lyrics are from the songs that I've produced with AI, they're country songs. They're not country yeehaw, they're... kind of pop country, middle of the road. Sometimes you wouldn't even know you're listening to a country song. Some of them are borderline with a kind of trans-Sanian country music. they're all songs, they speak of different life experiences. Some of them are specifically about autism, but the majority of them are about just life experiences, things I've gone through in my own life, things I've witnessed. I always found it easier to, I'm not a great speaker. The words don't come out fast or eloquently when I'm speaking them in real time. When I write books, when I write music, I can take my time and I can make the words sound and mean what I want them to sound in the end. So writing for me is a much better tool to convey my thoughts than speaking. And even when I write books or songs, I enjoy songs because I can convey more. Five or six minute songs, I can probably convey six chapters of a book. When writing your lyrics, you got to condense. You got to get a message across. You got a small amount of time to get those words. convey your message and I kind of want another interesting challenge because it makes you be brief but it's got to be meaningful too and I enjoyed that challenge so you guys are looking for any unique music Autistic music, music that's used from the heart. The Autistic Mile, our music store, has all our songs available along with the lyrics. These songs are all available on major streaming services. Apple Music, Spotify, Amazon Music, YouTube. We have our songs on YouTube. The Autistic Mile YouTube page has a playlist of all our songs. Check them out. They're unique. And that's what they're meant to be. They're not a ripoff of anybody else. music that we create via AI is unique. The vocals, again, although they're not me, they're unique. As part of that AI process, we license those productions. We pay for those services. AI is kind of a polarizing pop these days. Depending on where you are and what your line of business is, AI is if you love it or you hate it. I don't think they're in the middle ground. But it's becoming part of our life. We're it. for ADA therapy. I mean, it's for helping out with session notes and things like that. I mean, these are tools that are licensed by various companies to help produce better versions of the documentation that therapists create. And I mean, that's not the extent of it. I there's almost no place you can go online or a tool that you can't use that doesn't leverage AI in some way, shape or form. I like to rely on my own brain most of the time, but I find that AI does help. certain instances if I have something I'm working through. not songs per se, but if I've got something that, project or something that I want to know more about, find statistics, AI has its use of its own. Like I said, I write all my lyrics by hand, and anyone that's ever listened to my music, if they know me, they'll know those lyrics are coming from the heart. AI is not the type of thing you can just sit down and you tell the chat, hey, know, create me a great song about some experience. I mean, probably could, but that's not how I roll. If I can't sing and can't perform the musical piece, least I can do is contribute 100 % handwritten, authentic lyrics. That's what I learned in the process. I've even had family members, know, they, they hear that I produce the songs via AI, kinda, they look at it a little different. like, so you only, you only did the lyrics. Fair enough to say. But at the end of the day, when I create a song with my lyrics, even if I use AI, yesterday the song didn't exist. Today, it's on at 6. and if it brings anybody some happiness, some joy or if it resonates with them on any level. happy with that. Somebody wants to knock me for using AI to kind of find my voice. We use that word a lot when we have heard of autism. Having a voice or finding our voice. AI in some instances, in this instance in particular, kind of helps me find that voice. It's a voice I wouldn't otherwise have. These songs wouldn't be as good as they are. Even though the lyrics are solid, they wouldn't be as polished and they wouldn't be digestible in any other form. by utilizing AI to create components that I can't do myself. and lending my lyrics to those, my interpretation of lyrics. When I work on a song in AI, I'm very specific about the sound that I want for that song, the vocal, not only vocals, but the music. So it's not just cut and paste and scripted song into the AI and going, okay, create me a song, a country song. There's a lot more to it, you know? What's the move? What's the beat? What are the various components that you want to have within this song? What are the instruments? What type of vocals? You want something gritty? want something... What kind of voice are you looking for for this song? Now I've created songs that... Most of them have male voices, but I've actually done a couple that have solo female voices and also duets. So these songs, I can create songs, I can write songs for just about any situation. I'm not bound by my own physical limitations as a male. even if I was a vocalist. I find that including a female duet in certain situations really gives me more I'm looking for, more particular songs. But again, the end product is only as good as the vision that I'm presenting to the AI engine. Like I said, I can't do it all myself, these songs mean something to me and hopefully others will meaning in them as well. I listen to them all the time in addition to a lot of other music. As a matter of fact, we're going to start doing segments from the road. Not carpool karaoke, but it's going to be some music. I'll be singing along. So make sure you lock up your cats. I'm coming down the street and I'm singing. Your cat starts whining. It's probably me. Since we're talking music this morning, one of the new songs that I really went live songs to is a song by Laney Wilson and John Mayer. He's Phone Wallet. Very what you would seem and not natural pairing with a country star and a pop star. but you're starting to see more of that these days where you have artists crossing over and collaborating with other artists. The song is not that long, a little over three minutes, but I don't know, it's got a nice even tempo to it and it it's got a catchy hook. really a little different in terms of lyrics. First time I saw it on the radio, I was looking for the title and my radio was displaying the names of the artists, Laney Wilson and John Mayer. Phone, ease, wallet. I thought my phone was having a heart attack. I couldn't just seem it seemed like it was giving me the wrong information. So I looked it up. Damn sure as to those are the two artists and that was the name of the song. a lot going on. Lots unpacking that song, but it's it's a good song. It's got got some good vocals, it's got a A couple nice guitar solos by John Mayer. He hasn't really done as much recently. Mamie Wilson's all over the place. It goes on fire. She's gotten some good songs. She's the she's the thing right now. But one of the things that comes from music, but you know her songs and her lyrics, they kind of stand apart compared to a lot of other artists. And she does some interesting things, some interesting collaborations with with some different artists. And I like that about her, but she she's not just not a one trick pony as you say. She brings brings herself to each and every song, regardless of who she's collaborating with. always a great product. But if you're if you're looking for something new and again this one doesn't have that it's a country ish song but it's the kind of the quota's on country pop and doesn't have that not that deep country like some of the songs. you know some songs some country songs can't help it themselves but mention the word country a hundred times in the song. You know, it's I I enjoy and I respect an artist that can can kind of nibble at the edges a bit. And like me, you know I kind of get out outside the comfort zone. I enjoy seeing that in other people, whether it's in Whether it has do with music or it just has to do it right. Like I said before, life begins at the end of our comfort zone. It's when you start moving outside of the comfort zone that you start finding out what you're capable of. You know, you never know until you try. I ran for a lot of years before I even attempted to. going to marathon or half marathon. And I never just wanted one one marathon. I figured anybody with a reasonable level of fitness could will themselves to finish a marathon. But for me, I wanted to know that I wanted to know that I could it more once. I wanted to know that I was. I wanted to prove that I wouldn't quit. Because that's really what life's about. It's about perseverance, not quitting. regardless whether you're a running marathon or what you're You know, we have our setbacks of life, but quitting is kinda has a finality to it. You know? Quitting kind of leaves a mark. I'm hard to say that all the races of completed. I've never failed to finish the race. Well always the times that I wanted. But I always finished. Because I knew that I knew that if I had ever quit, it would stay with me. It would be something that would follow me the rest of my life. I couldn't have that. So three half marathons, five marathons. Done some gate river runs, other, you know, other races of various distances. my racing days are behind me. Let's make that clear. And regardless of the shape I'm in, or the shape I might be in going forward, that door was kind of closed. But like I said I'm 56 now and You don't get faster than you get older. But you learn to appreciate. You learn to appreciate every mile.