Latest / Mosaic Sparks with Lesley George / How Can You Say the Right Words and Still Lose Someone’s Trust?

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How Can You Say the Right Words and Still Lose Someone’s Trust? · Mosaic Sparks with Lesley George

• 0:01
  SPEAKER_01: Do people know your value or have they simply memorized your tone?
• 0:09
  SPEAKER_01: Today on Mosaic Sparks, we're exploring communication, customer service, and workplace confidence for Roz from Disney and Pixar's Monsters Inc.
• 0:22
  SPEAKER_01: Because the way you speak can influence how people experience the work you do.
• 0:39
  SPEAKER_00: I don't go with a cool box.
• 1:04
  SPEAKER_01: Hello, sparklers.
• 1:06
  SPEAKER_01: Welcome back to Mosaic Inc.
• 1:08
  SPEAKER_01: with me, Leslie George, where Disney characters and stories help you explore everyday leadership, recognize your gifts, and use your voice with confidence.
• 1:20
  SPEAKER_01: If this is your first time listening, welcome.
• 1:23
  SPEAKER_01: You are officially a sparkler, and I'm glad that you're here.
• 1:28
  SPEAKER_01: To my returning listeners, thank you for coming back and making this conversation part of your day.
• 1:34
  SPEAKER_01: So today's character has a voice you probably remember immediately.
• 1:40
  SPEAKER_01: We're talking about Roz.
• 1:42
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, the glasses wearing paper work chasing presents in Monsters Inc.
• 1:48
  SPEAKER_01: Mike Wazowski would love to get through his day without answering to her.
• 1:54
  SPEAKER_01: But Roz keeps paying attention to the responsibilities he would rather avoid.
• 2:01
  SPEAKER_01: She has that look that says she already knows your explanation, and she has reviewed it unfavorably.
• 2:11
  SPEAKER_01: Her exchanges with Mike, they're pretty funny because she's so blunt.
• 2:15
  SPEAKER_01: She expects him to do his part, and his charm does very little to move her.
• 2:21
  SPEAKER_01: Now, Roz also has more authority than Mike realizes because by the end of the film, we discover she is the number one of the child detection agency working undercover.
• 2:35
  SPEAKER_01: She definitely understands her assignment.
• 2:38
  SPEAKER_01: So for this episode, we are using her perspective to explore three lessons about communicating your value, holding people accountable, and understanding what your tone leaves behind.
• 2:54
  SPEAKER_01: These are lessons drawn from her character rather than words she actually says in the movies.
• 3:01
  SPEAKER_01: But before we get into them, let me tell you about one of my days and some tacos.
• 3:08
  SPEAKER_01: So there's a restaurant I order from frequently, and I've never had a problem.
• 3:13
  SPEAKER_01: But recently I placed a delivery order and received an alert from DoorDash saying my order had failed.
• 3:21
  SPEAKER_01: So, you know, naturally, I'm gonna call the restaurant.
• 3:24
  SPEAKER_01: They told me the driver had picked up the order, but I told them I never received it.
• 3:30
  SPEAKER_01: Now, from the restaurant's perspective, the food had left the building.
• 3:35
  SPEAKER_01: From my perspective, I was still waiting for lunch.
• 3:39
  SPEAKER_01: Now, those two things can both be true, and I'm still sitting there, guess what, without tacos.
• 3:46
  SPEAKER_01: So, how do you think I feel about ordering from there again?
• 3:50
  SPEAKER_01: Now, I have a history of good experiences with that restaurant.
• 3:54
  SPEAKER_01: This experience gives me something new to consider.
• 3:58
  SPEAKER_01: And it's what happens when there is a problem, and how will I be treated when I ask for help?
• 4:07
  SPEAKER_01: I can't determine from that exchange where the delivery failed.
• 4:12
  SPEAKER_01: What I can speak to is the experience of being the customer trying to understand what happened.
• 4:19
  SPEAKER_01: So when I call, I need someone to recognize that I'm still dealing with an unresolved problem.
• 4:26
  SPEAKER_01: A response such as, I understand you have not received it.
• 4:32
  SPEAKER_01: Our information shows that the driver collected it.
• 4:35
  SPEAKER_01: Let's explain what we can verify and what your next step is.
• 4:41
  SPEAKER_01: Now that gives me something useful.
• 4:44
  SPEAKER_01: The facts remain the same.
• 4:46
  SPEAKER_01: The communication helps me feel heard and understood how and how to move forward.
• 4:53
  SPEAKER_01: That is where tone matters.
• 4:58
  SPEAKER_01: Now you can have accurate information and still leave someone feeling dismissed.
• 5:03
  SPEAKER_01: You can complete your part of the work and still have a conversation that affects whether someone wants to work with you again.
• 5:10
  SPEAKER_01: So think about your own experience.
• 5:13
  SPEAKER_01: Have you ever asked a reasonable question and receive an answer that made you regret even asking in the first place?
• 5:21
  SPEAKER_01: You might remember very little about the explanation, but you remember how the person spoke to you.
• 5:29
  SPEAKER_01: Roz gives us a way to examine that without losing our sense of humor.
• 5:37
  SPEAKER_01: So let's take a look at lesson one.
• 5:41
  SPEAKER_01: From my side of the desk, I see a process.
• 5:45
  SPEAKER_01: From your side, you may have a problem.
• 5:49
  SPEAKER_01: Now, Roz pays attention to paperwork and responsibilities.
• 5:54
  SPEAKER_01: Mike would prefer that she pay attention to his excuses.
• 5:58
  SPEAKER_01: Through her perspective, our first lesson is to understand the process while making room for the person experiencing it.
• 6:06
  SPEAKER_01: Just like me at the restaurant, someone can confirm that the driver collected the food.
• 6:12
  SPEAKER_01: That information is important, but my question remains: what do I do now?
• 6:17
  SPEAKER_01: Because I have not received my food.
• 6:22
  SPEAKER_01: You may encounter that same gap in your work.
• 6:25
  SPEAKER_01: You sent the email, but the person can't find the instructions.
• 6:29
  SPEAKER_01: You may have submitted the request, but the person has no idea when to expect an answer.
• 6:37
  SPEAKER_01: What about you explain the policy, but the person still does not understand how it applies to their situation?
• 6:45
  SPEAKER_01: A useful conversation connects what you know with what the other person needs next.
• 6:52
  SPEAKER_01: Try asking, what is still unresolved for this person?
• 6:58
  SPEAKER_01: That question can help you avoid repeating an answer that has already failed to address their concern.
• 7:06
  SPEAKER_01: You may have limited authority.
• 7:10
  SPEAKER_01: You may need to refer them elsewhere and still explain that clearly and acknowledge the inconvenience.
• 7:18
  SPEAKER_01: So for example, I can confirm when we submitted it.
• 7:22
  SPEAKER_01: The next update comes from this department, and here is how we can contact them.
• 7:29
  SPEAKER_01: That gives the person a direction instead of leaving them standing at the edge of your job description.
• 7:37
  SPEAKER_01: So for the sparkler who works with customers, has clients, or community members, this is a practical leadership skill.
• 7:48
  SPEAKER_01: People need accurate information and they need help understanding what to do with it.
• 7:56
  SPEAKER_01: Your challenge is to look beyond the task you completed and consider the question that still remains.
• 8:05
  SPEAKER_01: Now let's get into lesson two.
• 8:09
  SPEAKER_01: Raz's blunt delivery is entertaining on screen.
• 8:17
  SPEAKER_01: But in your workplace, that same approach can make a conversation harder than it needs to be.
• 8:24
  SPEAKER_01: You may recognize the feeling behind it.
• 8:27
  SPEAKER_01: You have explained the requirement several times.
• 8:32
  SPEAKER_01: You have a deadline approaching.
• 8:35
  SPEAKER_01: Someone has arrived with another question, and your patience, and your patient is somewhere in the parking lot.
• 8:44
  SPEAKER_01: Frustration can slip into your voice before you have decided what to say.
• 8:50
  SPEAKER_01: The person hears the sigh, the sharpness, or the suggestion that they should already know better.
• 9:00
  SPEAKER_01: Their attention shifts from the instructions to how they feel about the exchange.
• 9:05
  SPEAKER_01: Sometimes it is not the work, it's the tone.
• 9:10
  SPEAKER_01: That deserves an honest look, especially when you are someone who takes pride in doing things correctly.
• 9:17
  SPEAKER_01: Being competent does not automatically make every conversation effective.
• 9:24
  SPEAKER_01: Communication requires its own attention.
• 9:27
  SPEAKER_01: So before you respond, ask yourself: what do I want this person to understand or do?
• 9:36
  SPEAKER_01: If you need a document, name the document and give the deadline.
• 9:42
  SPEAKER_01: Because if there's a mistake, explain what needs correcting.
• 9:47
  SPEAKER_01: Because if you can't fulfill a request, explain the limit and any available next step.
• 9:54
  SPEAKER_01: You should say, I need the completed form by Wednesday at noon so I can review it before the deadline.
• 10:02
  SPEAKER_01: If the person has missed that deadline repeatedly, what about addressing the pattern?
• 10:08
  SPEAKER_01: This has arrived late twice.
• 10:11
  SPEAKER_01: What needs to change so you can submit it to me on time?
• 10:16
  SPEAKER_01: That is clear accountability conversation.
• 10:19
  SPEAKER_01: Your tone can support the expectation instead of adding another problem to the exchange.
• 10:26
  SPEAKER_01: The same principle applies when you are the customer.
• 10:30
  SPEAKER_01: You can explain your frustration without attacking the person over the phone.
• 10:35
  SPEAKER_01: Just like me, I receive a failed delivery alert and I have not received my food.
• 10:42
  SPEAKER_01: Can you help me understand what happened and what should I do next?
• 10:47
  SPEAKER_01: Everybody has a better chance of reaching an answer when the conversation stays focused.
• 10:54
  SPEAKER_01: A calm voice does not require you to pretend that you are pleased.
• 11:00
  SPEAKER_01: It helps you use your energy toward the outcome you need.
• 11:07
  SPEAKER_01: So your challenge this week is to listen to the opening of your next difficult conversation.
• 11:15
  SPEAKER_01: Make sure it gives the other person a clear place to begin.
• 11:19
  SPEAKER_01: So let's go into lesson three.
• 11:23
  SPEAKER_01: Mike knows Roz expects paperwork.
• 11:28
  SPEAKER_01: He does not initially understand the full scope of her role.
• 11:33
  SPEAKER_01: That gives us our third lesson through her perspective, which is explain why your contribution is important.
• 11:44
  SPEAKER_01: You might be the person who asks follow-up questions, check in the details, or returns incomplete work, but other people may experience you primarily through those requests.
• 11:58
  SPEAKER_01: Help them understand what your attention makes possible.
• 12:02
  SPEAKER_01: It can be something like: I review the information before submission so missing deadlines can be corrected before they cause a delay.
• 12:14
  SPEAKER_01: I coordinate the schedule so we have the courage that we need.
• 12:25
  SPEAKER_01: These explanations connect your expectations to a purpose.
• 12:33
  SPEAKER_01: They also help you recognize your own value.
• 12:37
  SPEAKER_01: Because if you have been describing skill work as just something I do, take a closer look at that judgment, that experience, and the care that's involved.
• 12:50
  SPEAKER_01: And you know, this is where the brag comes in.
• 12:53
  SPEAKER_01: So the acronym for brag is be responsible for amplifying God's gifts in you.
• 13:00
  SPEAKER_01: You can acknowledge your contribution honestly and communicate it in language that people understand.
• 13:08
  SPEAKER_01: Your tone then becomes part of how you put that gift to work.
• 13:12
  SPEAKER_01: If you are gifted at organizing, help people understand a plan, gifted at teaching, give them room to ask questions, spot in problems, explain the concern, and then the next step?
• 13:29
  SPEAKER_01: Now that's a practical way to unbox your brilliance.
• 13:34
  SPEAKER_01: You are making your ability visible through both the work and the experience of working with you.
• 13:44
  SPEAKER_01: So your challenge is to finish the sentence.
• 13:47
  SPEAKER_01: The reason I pay attention to this is, and you need to fill that in.
• 13:53
  SPEAKER_01: Use an answer that explains the benefit.
• 13:57
  SPEAKER_01: You can discover that people respond differently when they understand what your standard is protecting.
• 14:07
  SPEAKER_01: So let's return to the top to my missing tacos.
• 14:11
  SPEAKER_01: My experience with the restaurant includes every order that went well.
• 14:17
  SPEAKER_01: It now also includes a moment when something went wrong and I needed help.
• 14:32
  SPEAKER_01: So your customers, your co-workers, clients, family members have their own version of their experience with you.
• 14:41
  SPEAKER_01: They may respect your knowledge and still hesitate to approach you.
• 14:48
  SPEAKER_01: What about appreciate your work and still need you to explain something with a little bit more care?
• 14:55
  SPEAKER_01: You can pay attention to that without abandoning your standards.
• 15:00
  SPEAKER_01: So this week, ask yourself one question before a difficult response.
• 15:09
  SPEAKER_01: Will my words help this person understand the next step?
• 15:16
  SPEAKER_01: Then communicates the then communicate the facts, acknowledge the concern, and explain what can happen next.
• 15:26
  SPEAKER_01: That is your sparkler challenge.
• 15:29
  SPEAKER_01: So if this episode gave you something to think about, share it with someone who leads a team, serves customers, or keeps a busy operation moving.
• 15:41
  SPEAKER_01: You can consider the conversation with me in Spark Out Loud, which is my free school community where we explore confidence, leadership, creativity, and putting your ideas into action.
• 15:58
  SPEAKER_01: The community link is in the show notes.
• 16:01
  SPEAKER_01: And so once again, thank you for joining me, Leslie George, on Mosaic Sparks.
• 16:06
  SPEAKER_01: So until next time, recognize the value of your work and pay attention to the way your voice delivers it.
• 16:17
  SPEAKER_01: People should leave your conversation knowing, understanding what happens next with their dignity still intact.
• 16:28
  SPEAKER_01: Preferably, they should also leave with their tacos.
• 16:34
  SPEAKER_01: Until next time, bye for now.