Latest / Dr. Derek H. Suite MD - The SuiteSpot / The Ceiling You Don’t See 3/7: You Don’t Rise to Confidence — You Perform to Belief #WinItAllWednesda

Transcript

The Ceiling You Don’t See 3/7: You Don’t Rise to Confidence — You Perform to Belief #WinItAllWednesda · Dr. Derek H. Suite MD - The SuiteSpot

• 0:06
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know about you, but I'm sure glad it's Wednesday.
• 0:10
  SPEAKER_00: And not just any Wednesday, my friends, it is Win It All Wednesday here.
• 0:14
  SPEAKER_00: Good morning, good morning, good morning.
• 0:16
  SPEAKER_00: I hope you have your coffee.
• 0:17
  SPEAKER_00: I hope you're ready.
• 0:18
  SPEAKER_00: I hope you're doing your thing.
• 0:19
  SPEAKER_00: And if you don't drink coffee, maybe it's tea, maybe it's some OJ.
• 0:23
  SPEAKER_00: Alright, or I hope it's organic, whatever it is, right?
• 0:26
  SPEAKER_00: So that it's really healthy.
• 0:28
  SPEAKER_00: Or good evening or good afternoon, depending on when you're listening here at the Sweet Spot.
• 0:32
  SPEAKER_00: I'm Dr.
• 0:32
  SPEAKER_00: Derek Sweet.
• 0:34
  SPEAKER_00: I'm your host.
• 0:35
  SPEAKER_00: I love working with you.
• 0:36
  SPEAKER_00: I love talking with you.
• 0:38
  SPEAKER_00: We talk every day here on The Sweet Spot.
• 0:40
  SPEAKER_00: We find ourselves this week in a the Ceiling You Don't See series.
• 0:45
  SPEAKER_00: The Ceiling You Don't See series.
• 0:49
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, we've been talking about beliefs.
• 0:52
  SPEAKER_00: And in today's episode, The Sealing You Don't See on Win It All Wednesday, we're saying this.
• 0:58
  SPEAKER_00: You don't rise to confidence, you perform to belief.
• 1:04
  SPEAKER_00: I'll say that again.
• 1:06
  SPEAKER_00: You don't rise to confidence, you perform to belief.
• 1:13
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, and as your fellow traveler here on this journey we call life, sitting across from you today, wherever we're sitting, I want to remind you that on Monday we said we don't see the ceiling until we hit it.
• 1:27
  SPEAKER_00: And that it's not until the pressure rises that it reveals the beliefs that we're quietly governing who we are all along.
• 1:36
  SPEAKER_00: We're all running around with our values and our beliefs.
• 1:40
  SPEAKER_00: And it's until not until they get tested with pressure, stress, or something big that we come up against our limits.
• 1:51
  SPEAKER_00: On Tuesday, we named a trap a lot of disciplined people fall into effort.
• 1:58
  SPEAKER_00: They work harder when they feel limit, they work harder when they hit that invisible ceiling.
• 2:03
  SPEAKER_00: But effort doesn't break ceilings.
• 2:05
  SPEAKER_00: We talked about that yesterday.
• 2:07
  SPEAKER_00: Please go back and listen to Take Action Tuesday.
• 2:10
  SPEAKER_00: We talked about this in detail.
• 2:12
  SPEAKER_00: Effort doesn't break ceilings.
• 2:14
  SPEAKER_00: Working harder inside your limiting belief is just costing you more energy.
• 2:20
  SPEAKER_00: You gotta change the belief.
• 2:23
  SPEAKER_00: Today, win it all Wednesday.
• 2:26
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, today's Win It All Wednesday.
• 2:28
  SPEAKER_00: We gotta go for it.
• 2:29
  SPEAKER_00: And today we need to correct something almost everyone misunderstands.
• 2:34
  SPEAKER_00: Confidence, my friend, is not the ceiling.
• 2:38
  SPEAKER_00: Belief is.
• 2:39
  SPEAKER_00: I'll say it again.
• 2:41
  SPEAKER_00: Confidence is not the ceiling, belief is.
• 2:44
  SPEAKER_00: Confidence, you see, goes up and down, it fluctuates.
• 2:49
  SPEAKER_00: It fluctuates with how much sleep you got, the results you're getting, the feedback, your mood.
• 2:55
  SPEAKER_00: But belief, belief, my friend, it sets the range of what you will attempt, how much you're gonna tolerate, what you're gonna persist and persevere through.
• 3:05
  SPEAKER_00: What do you believe?
• 3:07
  SPEAKER_00: I had a very, very powerful athlete tell me that it's not about belief, it's about what you believe.
• 3:14
  SPEAKER_00: What are you believing?
• 3:16
  SPEAKER_00: And that's why elite performers can feel doubt and still execute.
• 3:20
  SPEAKER_00: You ever wonder why some of these ice cold performers, they're really clutch performers, are able to execute, and why confident people sometimes shrink when the moment stretches them.
• 3:34
  SPEAKER_00: People you thought would deliver, they don't.
• 3:38
  SPEAKER_00: It's belief.
• 3:39
  SPEAKER_00: The difference is what they believe.
• 3:41
  SPEAKER_00: So let me make that concrete for you.
• 3:43
  SPEAKER_00: Think about someone who's about to step into a really big moment, a big presentation, a hard conversation, a medical decision, a life transition, something huge.
• 3:57
  SPEAKER_00: They might say to you, I don't feel confident.
• 4:01
  SPEAKER_00: But here's the real question.
• 4:03
  SPEAKER_00: Do they believe they can stay present and function under pressure?
• 4:10
  SPEAKER_00: Do they believe they can adapt if it doesn't go perfectly?
• 4:16
  SPEAKER_00: And do they believe that they can recover if it goes badly?
• 4:21
  SPEAKER_00: If they don't have any of these beliefs, staying present, adapting, recovering, my resilience, my ability to bounce back, that's a belief too.
• 4:31
  SPEAKER_00: If they don't have these beliefs, that's why they're in the invisible limited scenario that they're in.
• 4:41
  SPEAKER_00: If the belief is there, the performance shows up, even with the nerves.
• 4:46
  SPEAKER_00: And I've seen this over and over again in the sports where I function.
• 4:52
  SPEAKER_00: If belief is missing, confidence doesn't save you.
• 4:56
  SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna say that again.
• 4:58
  SPEAKER_00: If belief is missing, you can be as confident as you want.
• 5:01
  SPEAKER_00: It's not gonna save you.
• 5:02
  SPEAKER_00: And athletes know this, performers know this.
• 5:05
  SPEAKER_00: You'll hear them say things like, I didn't feel great today, but I trusted my work.
• 5:11
  SPEAKER_00: That's the belief talking.
• 5:13
  SPEAKER_00: You'll also see the opposite.
• 5:14
  SPEAKER_00: Someone looks confident, talks confident, talks a whole lot of trash, and then tightens and rushes and disappears when the game speeds up and the pressure rises.
• 5:25
  SPEAKER_00: That's not really a lack of confidence, it's a lack of belief.
• 5:28
  SPEAKER_00: That's a belief sealing that's asserting itself.
• 5:32
  SPEAKER_00: And the scripture, the ancient wisdom, is very, very clear about where you gotta put your beliefs.
• 5:42
  SPEAKER_00: In the message Bible, Mark 11, verses 22 to 23, have faith in God, embrace this God life, really embrace it, and nothing will be too much for you.
• 5:56
  SPEAKER_00: Let's listen to the King James version.
• 5:58
  SPEAKER_00: Have faith in God.
• 6:00
  SPEAKER_00: Whosoever shall say unto this mountain, be thou removed, and shall not doubt in his heart, but shall believe that person, whoever they are, whatsoever they say it, will have whatever they want.
• 6:17
  SPEAKER_00: I had lived in that, I just had to go there.
• 6:20
  SPEAKER_00: So, what am I saying?
• 6:21
  SPEAKER_00: Do you have a mountain in front of you?
• 6:23
  SPEAKER_00: Is there a mountain in your life right now?
• 6:28
  SPEAKER_00: Push it, climb it, dig around it, whatever it is, you're gonna have to believe in order to move it.
• 6:35
  SPEAKER_00: And changing your beliefs might be the first big step to removing the mountain.
• 6:43
  SPEAKER_00: And that's what's emphasized in these ancient verses, right?
• 6:47
  SPEAKER_00: It's not a feeling of fearlessness, it's not projecting confidence.
• 6:52
  SPEAKER_00: It talks about belief in your heart.
• 6:55
  SPEAKER_00: That's what you have to search.
• 6:58
  SPEAKER_00: Belief governs what you will do when things aren't working out.
• 7:05
  SPEAKER_00: Belief governs what you will say when you're under pressure.
• 7:12
  SPEAKER_00: Belief governs what you stay with when outcomes aren't immediate.
• 7:19
  SPEAKER_00: And let's bring in the science for a second.
• 7:22
  SPEAKER_00: Cognitive psychology and neuroscience literally tell us that belief can shape how you perceive threats.
• 7:32
  SPEAKER_00: If the brain believes the situation is survivable, meaningful, or workable, it will keep your prefrontal cortex, the CEO of your brain, online.
• 7:41
  SPEAKER_00: You'll stay flexible, you'll adapt, you'll look at the problem, you're like, you know what?
• 7:45
  SPEAKER_00: I got this.
• 7:46
  SPEAKER_00: I figured out a way to deal with this.
• 7:47
  SPEAKER_00: I know exactly what I have to do, and you will figure it out.
• 7:50
  SPEAKER_00: And you don't, you might feel some stress, but you know you got it.
• 7:55
  SPEAKER_00: But if your belief collapses, the brain shifts into what's called threat mode.
• 8:03
  SPEAKER_00: Tunnel vision, muscle tension, urgency, no clarity, fear, jumpiness, jitteriness, overinterpreting things, misinterpreting things.
• 8:14
  SPEAKER_00: And that's why performance doesn't rise to confidence, my friend.
• 8:18
  SPEAKER_00: It drops to whatever you believe.
• 8:22
  SPEAKER_00: So when the pressure hits, ask yourself something more useful than do I feel confident?
• 8:26
  SPEAKER_00: Don't ask everybody confidence.
• 8:28
  SPEAKER_00: Don't even ask about it.
• 8:29
  SPEAKER_00: Ask this what do I believe will happen if this gets difficult for me?
• 8:34
  SPEAKER_00: What do I believe about myself if things don't go perfectly?
• 8:38
  SPEAKER_00: What do I believe that I can handle right now?
• 8:42
  SPEAKER_00: Start asking about what you believe and searching your beliefs.
• 8:46
  SPEAKER_00: Those answers will tell you where your ceiling is, and it's that knowledge that will give you the power to change the belief, change the performance, change the outcome.
• 8:57
  SPEAKER_00: Confidence helps you start.
• 8:58
  SPEAKER_00: I'm not throwing confidence away, I'm not saying don't be confident.
• 9:02
  SPEAKER_00: It's a great start, but it's the belief that will determine how far you go.
• 9:07
  SPEAKER_00: You don't need to manufacture confidence today, my friends.
• 9:10
  SPEAKER_00: You don't need to pump yourself up and do all that.
• 9:14
  SPEAKER_00: Just notice what belief is governing your response when the moment comes to you, when the moment is pressuring you, when the moment is bigger than you.
• 9:23
  SPEAKER_00: Tomorrow, tomorrow, my friends, is trust yourself Thursday.
• 9:27
  SPEAKER_00: You don't want to miss it.
• 9:28
  SPEAKER_00: Because we're gonna talk about why people say, I trust myself, but only what they really believe inside matters.
• 9:40
  SPEAKER_00: I'm Dr.
• 9:41
  SPEAKER_00: Derek Sweet.
• 9:42
  SPEAKER_00: You're listening to The Sweet Spot.
• 9:43
  SPEAKER_00: If today gave you a clearer lens for what shows up under pressure for you, please subscribe.
• 9:49
  SPEAKER_00: It's absolutely free.
• 9:51
  SPEAKER_00: There's no charge for subscribing to The Sweet Spot.
• 9:54
  SPEAKER_00: And if you know someone stepping into a big moment right now or living in a big moment, I want you to share this with them so that they can benefit from this.
• 10:04
  SPEAKER_00: For now, my beautiful sweet winners, let confidence come and go, but guard what you believe about yourself under pressure.
• 10:13
  SPEAKER_00: That's the message because that's where performance really lives.
• 10:17
  SPEAKER_00: We're building this together.
• 10:18
  SPEAKER_00: I'll see you tomorrow.