Latest / Get It Got It Girl: Midlife Rebuild / From Toxic Patterns To Self-Forgiveness And Joy

Transcript

From Toxic Patterns To Self-Forgiveness And Joy · Get It Got It Girl: Midlife Rebuild

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome, welcome, welcome.
• 0:02
  SPEAKER_00: This is Tina.
• 0:02
  SPEAKER_00: Get it, got it, girl.
• 0:04
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome to this bonus round.
• 0:06
  SPEAKER_00: And we're on the topic of forgiveness.
• 0:12
  SPEAKER_00: Do you ever notice how sometimes, like, the hardest part you think is the pain?
• 0:17
  SPEAKER_00: And I know the hardest part is the pain, but sometimes it's actually the energy behind the pain.
• 0:22
  SPEAKER_00: Like, there's just like a low vibe.
• 0:25
  SPEAKER_00: It's nothing good.
• 0:27
  SPEAKER_00: It I mean, I wouldn't say nothing good comes from pain because this podcast or just helping other people comes good.
• 0:35
  SPEAKER_00: Some pain is meant to teach us to help others, to share our experiences.
• 0:40
  SPEAKER_00: I do believe that it's our duty.
• 0:43
  SPEAKER_00: Like if you've been through something and you know how you felt, and maybe actually for you, maybe you discovered something, maybe an audiobook, or maybe you saw a TikTok or Instagram or some kind of reel that showed you, like, oh, it helped you step out of it.
• 1:00
  SPEAKER_00: And that's kind of like a payback.
• 1:02
  SPEAKER_00: Like, this is almost like paying it forward.
• 1:04
  SPEAKER_00: I was in a way, I was back in a way a year ago.
• 1:07
  SPEAKER_00: And now I've been through this last year.
• 1:10
  SPEAKER_00: I've left an abusive, toxic relationship.
• 1:13
  SPEAKER_00: I actually left a pattern of that after 36 years.
• 1:17
  SPEAKER_00: So I had to forgive myself because what in me thought that I only deserve that?
• 1:23
  SPEAKER_00: No, that's not acceptable anymore.
• 1:26
  SPEAKER_00: And so I had to forgive myself.
• 1:28
  SPEAKER_00: And that I think that was even harder because the blame and the shame.
• 1:34
  SPEAKER_00: I think we're we're more hard on ourselves.
• 1:38
  SPEAKER_00: And so today I just wanted to share like when we don't forgive what happens.
• 1:43
  SPEAKER_00: It just can like weigh you down.
• 1:46
  SPEAKER_00: And I feel like it blocks some of the good things from coming.
• 1:49
  SPEAKER_00: It's like almost when you're down and out, you you don't really you're surviving.
• 1:55
  SPEAKER_00: You're not revived.
• 2:00
  SPEAKER_00: You're like, you're not thriving.
• 2:02
  SPEAKER_00: I know I like that one too.
• 2:03
  SPEAKER_00: I've heard that before from many different speakers.
• 2:07
  SPEAKER_00: But you have to thrive.
• 2:09
  SPEAKER_00: We're not just gonna survive because I don't know, I'm in my 50s, early 50s, and I don't know, I might have 30 years life or left to live or 20.
• 2:18
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know.
• 2:20
  SPEAKER_00: And we just never know.
• 2:22
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm ready for the good thing, good thing.
• 2:24
  SPEAKER_00: So let's clear some space up and build like the community together.
• 2:27
  SPEAKER_00: That's what is important.
• 2:29
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I believe like it's okay to heal yourself solo, and I did that.
• 2:33
  SPEAKER_00: I took space.
• 2:36
  SPEAKER_00: I stayed home at night.
• 2:37
  SPEAKER_00: I used to go out all the time.
• 2:39
  SPEAKER_00: I took that time.
• 2:40
  SPEAKER_00: No, I've read, I don't know, 15, 20 books in the last year pieces, done book work, wrote letters, did the life coaching, took the course.
• 2:50
  SPEAKER_00: If you look in my notebooks, you'll see all these different things that I've gone through.
• 2:55
  SPEAKER_00: And so forgiveness does help.
• 2:58
  SPEAKER_00: It heals, it heals you.
• 3:01
  SPEAKER_00: And I know, like sometimes it's hard to feel like you want to forgive the other person.
• 3:07
  SPEAKER_00: But this is a person that you once loved.
• 3:09
  SPEAKER_00: You don't want, I know, like if you were in an abusive situation, this is a totally different experience.
• 3:15
  SPEAKER_00: And I get that because I was there.
• 3:17
  SPEAKER_00: I'm not gonna excuse the behavior, but I'm going to forgive him.
• 3:21
  SPEAKER_00: And it's not for him, it's for me.
• 3:24
  SPEAKER_00: It is for you to forgive the person that hurt you.
• 3:27
  SPEAKER_00: Trust me, it helps you.
• 3:29
  SPEAKER_00: I feel so much better.
• 3:30
  SPEAKER_00: I feel ready for the good things, and that's what like series, the next series starting with episode 14.
• 3:36
  SPEAKER_00: Like, we're still gonna do our meditation.
• 3:38
  SPEAKER_00: I'm still gonna do my meditation 30 days, and then we're gonna tie that into transforming because this is about transforming your toxic patterns, not staying there, but transforming them.
• 3:51
  SPEAKER_00: And maybe some of you can do this without forgiving others.
• 3:54
  SPEAKER_00: It's just a suggestion, it's just something that has worked for me, and so I'm just sharing my lived experience with you.
• 4:03
  SPEAKER_00: And just imagine what things you could do once you forgive somebody and get some new space.
• 4:09
  SPEAKER_00: Like you can put some good space in there.
• 4:10
  SPEAKER_00: You might be able to get out of bed, go take a walk, sit by some water, do something that you enjoy, treat yourself to a meal, or maybe there's a movie that you want to watch.
• 4:22
  SPEAKER_00: Go out and get some popcorn, get the popcorn, get extra butter, get the salt, get whatever you want, get yourself a soda and sit there and watch and laugh with the movie.
• 4:32
  SPEAKER_00: Call up some friends, go hang out.
• 4:35
  SPEAKER_00: People start asking you to go, and instead of you saying no all the time, maybe you say yes.
• 4:40
  SPEAKER_00: You're gonna do things that expand your life and help you feel better.
• 4:46
  SPEAKER_00: And then just notice how the shifts open up and you feel more good energy and it makes you feel better.
• 4:51
  SPEAKER_00: Like I'm already feeling better.
• 4:52
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know about you, but dancing is my go-to.
• 4:56
  SPEAKER_00: And I lately, the last couple nights, I have danced so much.
• 5:01
  SPEAKER_00: I'm happy, I'm healing.
• 5:03
  SPEAKER_00: The joy is coming.
• 5:04
  SPEAKER_00: I'm ready, ready for the joy.
• 5:06
  SPEAKER_00: I'm ready for the good life.
• 5:11
  SPEAKER_00: So, as we let go of some of these heavy feelings, we're gonna bring the good ones in.
• 5:22
  SPEAKER_00: Dive right in.
• 5:24
  SPEAKER_00: That's what we're gonna focus on next series, episode 14.
• 5:27
  SPEAKER_00: We're diving in, we're looking for the good, we're looking for the fun, we're looking for the positivity, and we're diving in.
• 5:33
  SPEAKER_00: We're becoming ourselves again.
• 5:35
  SPEAKER_00: You're not just becoming yourself, you're basically becoming who you've always wanted to be underneath.
• 5:41
  SPEAKER_00: I've always wanted to do a podcast, it took three years.
• 5:47
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, I'm so glad I helped.
• 5:49
  SPEAKER_00: I just actually started it to help people.
• 5:52
  SPEAKER_00: I had no intention of it working to help myself.
• 5:57
  SPEAKER_00: That was very interesting.
• 5:58
  SPEAKER_00: I was very shocked by that and very happy because I believe that it gives people faith.
• 6:03
  SPEAKER_00: I'm an example of how doing what you want to do and doing something that is deep in your soul helps you.
• 6:12
  SPEAKER_00: Like it.
• 6:14
  SPEAKER_00: I just I have no words.
• 6:16
  SPEAKER_00: Basically, I am speechless at this moment because again, I have shivers, like real shivers going up and down my body.
• 6:23
  SPEAKER_00: If this wasn't audible, you would see it like just goosebumps up and down my arms.
• 6:28
  SPEAKER_00: And that to me is positive healing.
• 6:31
  SPEAKER_00: I can tell things are switching.
• 6:33
  SPEAKER_00: I can see I'm happy for no reason.
• 6:35
  SPEAKER_00: Like, yes, I'm not going to be stuck in my pain story.
• 6:40
  SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna use it to help others and still help myself, and but it's not gonna be my whole being.
• 6:46
  SPEAKER_00: I'm ready to be myself, the goofball.
• 6:48
  SPEAKER_00: Oh my gosh, goofy.
• 6:50
  SPEAKER_00: Like let yourself out.
• 6:51
  SPEAKER_00: If you're goofy, be goofy.
• 6:52
  SPEAKER_00: If you're quirky, be quirky.
• 6:55
  SPEAKER_00: I want to start experiencing life.
• 6:57
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know how many days I have left.
• 6:59
  SPEAKER_00: There's people that die every day and they have regrets, and that's another thing.
• 7:03
  SPEAKER_00: I listen to some.
• 7:04
  SPEAKER_00: Well, I listen to Mel Robbins a lot, which is strange because I listen to a lot of mentors, and the weirdest thing is sometimes I'm thinking about and going through the things that later they'll talk about after I've already been through the thing, and I'm like, how do they know?
• 7:21
  SPEAKER_00: It's very interesting.
• 7:24
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, so if you ever needed to forgive somebody, at least forgive yourself.
• 7:30
  SPEAKER_00: You only did what you could with what you knew.
• 7:33
  SPEAKER_00: You did your best, and sometimes our best is, you know, not ideal.
• 7:40
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know what words to fill in here, but you did your best.
• 7:43
  SPEAKER_00: You did the best that you could during the time that you were going through something.
• 7:48
  SPEAKER_00: Don't shame yourself, don't feel embarrassed.
• 7:51
  SPEAKER_00: You'll find your people, find your community, and I believe that's what I'm doing.
• 7:55
  SPEAKER_00: I'm trying to find the community and trying to search to help everybody I can in this community of get it, got it, girl.
• 8:04
  SPEAKER_00: We don't just get it, we get it.
• 8:07
  SPEAKER_00: And you are it.
• 8:08
  SPEAKER_00: You are good enough, you are worthy, you are everything that you need to be.
• 8:14
  SPEAKER_00: Don't forget that.
• 8:15
  SPEAKER_00: Don't let anybody dim your sparkle.
• 8:17
  SPEAKER_00: Nobody.
• 8:18
  SPEAKER_00: If you're silly, be silly.
• 8:20
  SPEAKER_00: Be yourself and just be.
• 8:23
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, as that goes, we're gonna close out.
• 8:25
  SPEAKER_00: This is bonus 13.
• 8:28
  SPEAKER_00: And wow, this is like the third or fourth time I had to do it.
• 8:31
  SPEAKER_00: I'm not superstitious, however, there was some technical difficulties.
• 8:36
  SPEAKER_00: All right, bonus 13.
• 8:38
  SPEAKER_00: Moving on to series 14.
• 8:39
  SPEAKER_00: We're bringing on joy and peace and just more high energy and just feeling better.
• 8:46
  SPEAKER_00: If you're not ready for it, that's okay.
• 8:48
  SPEAKER_00: But I'm here for you.
• 8:49
  SPEAKER_00: Get it, got it, girl.
• 8:51
  SPEAKER_00: Have a good week.