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From healing to alignment: what I am leaning into in 2026 · SAY GRACE | Weight Loss + Health for Overwhelmed Women- Stress, Busy, Consistency, Realistic, Motivation, Starting Over, No Restrictions

• 0:40
  Okay, y'all. So we have talked on several episodes now about 2025.
• 0:46
  I have reflected on the year. I have given you guys all my tea on my life,
• 0:51
  you know, and, and it was a really impactful year.
• 0:56
  Right. And so I think I'm a sharer.
• 0:59
  So I, so, you know, I just were vomited all over y'all all throughout the year.
• 1:03
  I think if you notice, like if you were to go back and listen to some episodes
• 1:06
  from, you know, the spring and the summer, you would notice now that like,
• 1:09
  I was really working through a lot.
• 1:13
  And so with that, though, I'm like,
• 1:16
  I've been so excited to look ahead to 2026 because of the struggle that was
• 1:25
  2025, because of the hard work that was 2025.
• 1:29
  Now I'm like, oh my gosh, I'm ready for 2026.
• 1:32
  And like, I hope, I hope you can say that about your own life,
• 1:36
  you know, sure, things may not have gone the exact way we all hoped,
• 1:40
  you know, and mine, y'all, mine shawl didn't turn out the way I thought it was gonna, right?
• 1:45
  And if you've listened to those episodes, you know that.
• 1:49
  But we, I hope we all can at least look back and say, oh my gosh,
• 1:52
  but this, like, because it happened that way, now I'm able to walk in this way, you know?
• 1:59
  And so in doing that I
• 2:02
  have been really preparing for 2026 like okay
• 2:06
  I've been trying to come up with my word and I'm still
• 2:09
  struggling with my word I mean maybe by the time this one airs I'll have I'll
• 2:12
  have my word set in stone it's like I have a lot of words like I think I need
• 2:17
  to narrow down on my own on one word but anyway you know and so I've been able
• 2:23
  to kind of just dive in and say, okay, how do I want this to look?
• 2:26
  Because 2025 was, it began like looking back this time last year,
• 2:33
  right? It began with total exhaustion.
• 2:36
  Total overwhelm and total surrender because I was at like my emotional bottom.
• 2:42
  Like I had control freaked myself to death and it was getting me nowhere,
• 2:48
  but, but exhausted and overwhelmed and, you know, autoimmune stuff and sick all the time.
• 2:55
  And you know what I mean? So it was, so I had done enough myself that I had
• 3:00
  gotten to a point where I was like, okay, I think I'll just let you handle it, God.
• 3:04
  He's probably up there like, finally, you know what I mean? And so,
• 3:09
  but because of that, I started very weary.
• 3:11
  And I think if you've been in a season like that, you know what I mean.
• 3:16
  Like when you've tried your best to, you know, do it all, control it all,
• 3:21
  understand it all, whatever, and then nothing is still is aligned.
• 3:25
  You become weary. And so that's where I was this time last year.
• 3:29
  And so it's crazy because even when I went to the retreat in January,
• 3:33
  like I just wanted to rest.
• 3:36
  Like I just, you know, I'm like, I don't even have it in me to think about goals or the future.
• 3:42
  Like the future sounded really hard and really overwhelming and really dreadful, to be honest.
• 3:48
  You know, regardless of what it brought, it could have brought tons of blessings,
• 3:51
  but like the thought of having to show up for it was really stressful you know what I mean and so.
• 4:00
  It's just been such a beautiful thing even as I
• 4:03
  have prepared for this and like you know thought about okay what am I leaning
• 4:06
  into in 2026 like what do I want to see for myself in 2026 it's been so awesome
• 4:11
  to reflect back and see how vastly different like I feel about looking ahead to the year.
• 4:21
  And so I thought today I would just share with you guys like what I personally
• 4:24
  am leaning into for this year.
• 4:27
  And I hope that, you know, it can inspire you to do the same or inspire you
• 4:31
  to at least think about it for yourself.
• 4:34
  And again, like thinking about how 2025 helped us to get to this point of what we want for 2026.
• 4:45
  Right. And that's for some of us that could be really like a bad,
• 4:48
  like not bad things, but yeah, like, you know, for me in 2025,
• 4:52
  I thought back to 2024 and I thought, oh my God, I was sick and I was tired
• 4:56
  all the time. And so that led me to.
• 5:00
  Decide I had to show up differently for 2025. And so for some of you,
• 5:04
  it may be the case for 2026, right?
• 5:07
  So I'm just going to run through some things that I'm leaning into this year.
• 5:10
  I have high hopes for, and I just feel kind of in my soul that this is where
• 5:16
  I need to focus for the year.
• 5:19
  And so the first one is growth.
• 5:21
  Okay. And so last year was a lot about healing.
• 5:26
  And so I did heal. I healed in all kinds of areas, right?
• 5:30
  And that in itself is growth, right? When you are actively healing, you are growing.
• 5:35
  But it's a different kind of growth, right? It feels like you're patching up
• 5:39
  a wound instead of building something bigger, you know?
• 5:43
  And so that's what I was doing. I was just patching up the windows in the house.
• 5:47
  I wasn't putting the second layer on top of it. And so today,
• 5:51
  not today, this year, for me, it's about finding like growth that is multiplication.
• 6:00
  Okay, that is, okay, we've healed. We are, you know, feeling whole.
• 6:06
  We are feeling energized again because we are feeling whole, you know.
• 6:10
  And so now I know, like, I have a purpose here on this earth,
• 6:13
  you know, and I've known that all along.
• 6:15
  But last year, I just kind of took this pause and it was like,
• 6:18
  okay, you've got to fix yourself before you can, you know, continue with your
• 6:22
  drive for your purpose and everything.
• 6:23
  And so now I'm just like, okay, what's next? You know, because I know I'm here
• 6:28
  for a reason. And I know that there are big things ahead.
• 6:32
  And so really trying to find that excitement and find that spark again,
• 6:38
  now that I have done this unraveling and feel more grounded in my life and in
• 6:44
  my day to day, it's like, okay,
• 6:46
  it's cool too, because it's like, now I have a different perspective on it.
• 6:53
  You know, like in the past.
• 6:54
  I've never really been grounded. I've never really been regulated, you know?
• 6:59
  And so excitement and spark and motivation and, you know, growing to me meant imbalance.
• 7:08
  It meant, you know, I'm ignoring my family to grow my business,
• 7:12
  right? Or I'm ignoring my business to build a home.
• 7:14
  Or I'm ignoring my husband to pour more time into my kids.
• 7:17
  Like, I couldn't find balance because I was so passionate about whatever I was
• 7:22
  focused on for growth in that season.
• 7:25
  And so it's really exciting to me to finally like feel this balance and feel
• 7:30
  this grounding and feel the ability to be able to kind of spread it across the
• 7:35
  board evenly and still go to sleep at night like, okay, we're good.
• 7:41
  You know, we've seen, yeah, some areas more than others maybe today,
• 7:44
  we've seen growth, right? But we've still seen some progress.
• 7:49
  And so that is like one thing that I just, this recording is going out before
• 7:53
  I go back to my retreat that I'm talking about.
• 7:56
  I'm going again in January. This will probably be my last one for a while before
• 8:00
  I have this baby, you know.
• 8:01
  And so I am going back. And so I'm recording this before I go.
• 8:05
  And I'm so excited to go because I talked about how in July when I went,
• 8:10
  I was like, I don't want to grow my membership. I don't see a future for my business.
• 8:18
  Like, I just want to stay steady and rest. You know, that was kind of my mindset
• 8:22
  in the room. And I stood out in a negative way because of that, you know.
• 8:28
  And now I'm so excited to be able to go back and be like, okay,
• 8:31
  I'm ready for what you've got at this retreat.
• 8:35
  Like, I'm ready to talk about growth. I'm ready to talk about ideas.
• 8:38
  Like y'all, even just my team, they're probably so tired of me.
• 8:42
  I have sent so many emails with ideas and things I want to do.
• 8:45
  And, you know, and that's just, that has not been the case for me for the past year.
• 8:50
  And so that's just, it's just super exciting for me. But,
• 8:54
  At the same time, another thing that I really want to lean into is slowing down, okay?
• 8:59
  And I think, again, year after year, I do a better and better job at this.
• 9:03
  But I think it's something that I can't take my foot off the gas with this or
• 9:07
  else, you know, we'll get swallowed up whole.
• 9:10
  And so still finding that discernment to say no where I need to say no,
• 9:15
  right? to prioritize my time so that.
• 9:23
  I will then open up time, open up bandwidth, open up, you know,
• 9:28
  mental space to truly be present for the memories that I want to be present for, right?
• 9:35
  I know, right, with this third baby's coming, and I know how fast our days are
• 9:39
  going to be with this baby.
• 9:41
  And, like, it was really fast with Sarah Mason, but, like, she was our only child, right?
• 9:46
  So we kind of, I mean, she was our baby, and we kind of, like,
• 9:49
  went to work and came home and obsessed over our baby, right? Right.
• 9:52
  And then with Glory, same thing.
• 9:55
  Sarah Mason was in school. So we had a little bit more going on, but then COVID hit.
• 9:59
  And like, that was such a blessing for us because we were able to truly slow
• 10:03
  down. We were forced to slow down.
• 10:05
  Right. And so the few things that Sarah Mason was active in got canceled.
• 10:11
  And we were at home a lot with Sarah Mason and the baby. And those are some
• 10:14
  of our most cherished days.
• 10:16
  And so now I'm like, oh my gosh, we're going to have this third baby,
• 10:20
  but we also have these two older kids that are like involved in all the things that, you know,
• 10:26
  we do have to, you know, cart around that, you know, birthday parties and dance.
• 10:32
  Performances and just, you know, all the things that come with having older kids.
• 10:35
  And so I know that having this third baby isn't going to leave as much room
• 10:41
  for soaking in those memories and cherishing that time unless I force it, unless I'm very,
• 10:48
  very purposeful about making sure there is time.
• 10:53
  And so we've already kind of started that now. Like we're just kind of,
• 10:56
  you know, making space in our days, making space in our schedule,
• 11:01
  really kind of trying to set up.
• 11:04
  A rhythm around here that allows for it.
• 11:08
  So then when the baby does come, everybody won't be shell-shocked, right?
• 11:12
  So that is one thing that I'm really, really leaning into as I head into 2026.
• 11:18
  And so the next thing is fuel, okay? And this is two parts. And I really,
• 11:23
  I was like, okay, the word, the word, you know, what word?
• 11:26
  I really think it's fuel, right? And so I'm going to tell you the first part
• 11:30
  of it, which is obviously like the first part of the year right now.
• 11:35
  Obviously, I'm trying to fuel my body well to have a healthy pregnancy,
• 11:39
  okay, to serve myself and my baby well, okay?
• 11:41
  And so, you know, it's not just about like staying a decent size in my pregnancy,
• 11:47
  but also like noticing now more than ever how certain foods are affecting my
• 11:53
  energy, are affecting how I feel physically.
• 11:56
  If you've been if you follow me on social, you know, I've been really trying
• 11:59
  to focus on protein because like, protein foods don't sound delicious to me
• 12:03
  ever, but especially in this pregnancy.
• 12:06
  And I but I know that it like I notice it if I avoid protein ish all day long.
• 12:13
  I'm like really tired. I don't have much energy.
• 12:16
  I definitely don't feel like working out. You know, I just it's such a difference
• 12:20
  in who I am and how I show up.
• 12:22
  And so really just being very focused there on how I feel my body.
• 12:27
  And so it will be the same once I have the baby, right?
• 12:32
  And it won't be just about like hurrying up and getting this baby weight off as fast as I can.
• 12:36
  It's, it's, and I think that comes with like the third kid, you know,
• 12:40
  the first one with Sarah Mason, I kind of was like, oh my God,
• 12:44
  am I capable of losing this weight after having a baby?
• 12:47
  You know what I mean? And And then after glory, I almost felt like I had something
• 12:51
  to prove. Like, okay, I'm going
• 12:53
  to, you know, I'm going to show people how fast I can lose this weight.
• 12:56
  And so with this one, I'm just going to be kind of like, or I feel like,
• 12:59
  you know, I hope to be, you know, just like, okay.
• 13:02
  I got these three kids and I got a business to run.
• 13:07
  Yes, I want to lose this weight and I want to lose it in a healthy and yeah, somewhat quick way.
• 13:12
  But I also want to make sure that I am fueling my body well for it,
• 13:18
  right? Because too, at the same time, I'm not getting any younger.
• 13:20
  So I'm also thinking about fueling my 39 year old body while I'm trying to lose
• 13:26
  that baby weight, you know, and while I'm breastfeeding an infant and while
• 13:29
  I'm trying to keep my energy up for all the things that are going to be demanded of me.
• 13:34
  And so thinking about it as fuel to support my overall bodily energy, mood, sleep,
• 13:45
  everything, hormone needs, is just really where my head is at this year with
• 13:51
  everything that I have coming.
• 13:54
  But on the second, on the second half of that fuel, still on fuel,
• 13:59
  is fueling my energy levels.
• 14:02
  Okay. And again, this kind of is the same. It kind of ties into slowing down, but not really.
• 14:09
  Y'all, if I'm so busy trying to give a little bit of myself to everything,
• 14:14
  then all the things get watered down.
• 14:18
  Hello, hear it again. man, you mama who's driving, eating fast food,
• 14:24
  taking somebody to some practice, you know, texting your boss back at 7 p.m.
• 14:29
  Like, I'm talking to you, okay?
• 14:31
  If I'm busy trying to give a little bit or a little of myself to everything,
• 14:37
  then all the things get watered down.
• 14:40
  And just over my years as I've done this, as I have proved this to be true,
• 14:46
  right, and I have seen so many missed opportunities and.
• 14:52
  Potential not met from myself. I'm not talking about from others.
• 14:56
  Like I can look back and just see, like I was overstimulated.
• 14:59
  I was overstretched, was dysregulated, right?
• 15:03
  So I was constantly busy moving, trying to do things all the time,
• 15:06
  trying to blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, you know, and the potential wasn't met.
• 15:10
  And it sucks. And it hurts my heart because I'm like,
• 15:14
  the Lord put whatever it was, you know, this has been several different cases
• 15:18
  in my life, but the Lord put whatever it was in front of me,
• 15:21
  knowing that I had the potential to give it all that it needed and all that it required.
• 15:27
  But because I couldn't say no to the other things, because I couldn't slow down
• 15:36
  or stop the distraction or whatever, I missed it. I missed the mark, you know?
• 15:42
  And so by preserving my energy and only pouring into the things that matter
• 15:47
  most to me and that I'm best at, right?
• 15:49
  The things that I feel called towards, that I feel drawn towards, right?
• 15:53
  I am serving myself better because my days are obviously going to be a lot more peaceful, right?
• 16:00
  I'm serving everyone else better because they're getting a result that they hope to get from me.
• 16:06
  But most of all, I'm serving the Lord better, y'all.
• 16:10
  Like I am not trying to be all, do all, have all, show that I've got it all together, right?
• 16:15
  But I am wanting to say like, but these are the things that I feel are the most
• 16:21
  important and the most pressing.
• 16:22
  So that's what I'm going to do. And so I will say, I'm trying so hard to like
• 16:27
  force myself into, I mean, I have adopted this, you know, a good bit over time.
• 16:33
  But like, we just, we just, we are changing some things inside the business.
• 16:40
  And so I am such a person of, I'll just do it myself.
• 16:44
  Like, I'll just handle it. I'll let y'all know, you know, and so it's been very,
• 16:49
  very hard for me inside the business right now to not do that,
• 16:56
  to say like, no, like I hired this person to do this job.
• 17:01
  So let me ask her to do her job. Like she would probably love to get paid, you know what I mean?
• 17:07
  So let me ask her to do her job, you know?
• 17:10
  And so I think I started that at home first, where I started asking Jess for
• 17:17
  things, you know, just things he may not even recognize that needed to be done.
• 17:22
  Like I started speaking up and saying like, hey, can you help me out with this?
• 17:25
  And I have such a wonderful husband that he always, you know, would. He was willing.
• 17:29
  He just sometimes his eyes don't see things the way my eyes see things, right?
• 17:33
  So he's not going to always just know it needs to be done. But if I ask him, he will.
• 17:38
  And then I started realizing my kids are six and 10 years old.
• 17:42
  They can hang up their own daggum clothes.
• 17:45
  They can help us put the dishes away. They can learn how to run a vacuum.
• 17:50
  You know, like these are things that...
• 17:53
  Was control-freaking, to be honest, you know, and I was thinking,
• 17:58
  in my mind, I'm just like, it would take too long to go ask them to stop watching
• 18:01
  TV, to get up and do blah, blah, blah, you know, or whatever.
• 18:04
  It would take me too long to explain to Jess how I want this to look and how
• 18:08
  I need this to go, and, you know, that was really where my mind was,
• 18:12
  and so, but I started, especially,
• 18:15
  like, working with a therapist, this was years ago, I started to slowly do those
• 18:19
  things, like ask for help, explain what I needed to be done, you know, whatever.
• 18:23
  And now it's so cool because in the household, everybody feels a little bit
• 18:27
  more a part of, of keeping things running, you know, and it doesn't feel like
• 18:33
  it's just mom's job, you know, because we have clearly made it apparent that it's not.
• 18:38
  And so now I'm really trying to like take that the next step further with,
• 18:43
  with things inside the business. I mean, obviously our girl's,
• 18:46
  that work for me. They have things to do,
• 18:49
  right? But like, it's additional responsibilities that I'm talking about.
• 18:54
  And so it's been really, so far, it's been a really great thing for me.
• 18:59
  And it's been a really great thing for them too. Because what do people want?
• 19:02
  People want to be trusted. They want to be involved.
• 19:04
  They want to feel valuable, you know?
• 19:07
  And so I'm helping them get fulfilled by trusting them with the things that
• 19:12
  they were hired to be trusted with.
• 19:15
  And then I am being fulfilled because I feel like I'm reaching my arm closer
• 19:20
  to reaching that potential by not quickly doing a hundred different tasks,
• 19:26
  but rather asking the people whose responsibility it could be to get it done.
• 19:31
  You know, so that is that is my next one is just leaning into fuel.
• 19:35
  That was kind of a long one.
• 19:37
  So kind of along those lines, I would say is discipline in my day.
• 19:44
  Okay. And so again, it all goes back to 2025, y'all.
• 19:49
  I was so just, I was just so overwhelmed and like exhausted all the time.
• 19:55
  But like my daily routine, other than my morning routine, I mean,
• 19:59
  I've had that forever, right?
• 20:01
  But my daily routine just was kind of like whatever I could muster up the energy
• 20:06
  for, you know, like I stopped using my daily planner halfway through the year.
• 20:11
  Like I just was kind of like I'm trying to make it you know and so now that
• 20:17
  I do have this more growth mindset and I do have goals that I want to achieve
• 20:20
  for for the business specifically it's like okay,
• 20:25
  I got to get some discipline back in my day-to-day, like, to-dos so that I know
• 20:32
  what to expect. I know what's next.
• 20:34
  You know, I know, you know, what I'm setting out to do today.
• 20:38
  And so I've gotten so good. And I've been this way my whole life.
• 20:41
  I'm ADHD and I'm unmedicated, so hello.
• 20:44
  But I'm so good at procrastinating. You know, like, even the littlest things.
• 20:50
  You know, like, emailing my kid's teacher about something. I will wait three days to do that.
• 20:56
  And so I'm really leaning into doing the things that I know I need to get done
• 21:03
  right when they cross my mind.
• 21:05
  You know, of course, when I'm sitting down at work, I'm not trying to do it
• 21:08
  while, you know, eating dinner with my family or whatever.
• 21:11
  But and then also in the same in the same sense, trying to find what works, right?
• 21:17
  Like what what works for me as far as the flow now?
• 21:21
  Because like I just said, I'm offloading some tasks to my team, right?
• 21:25
  I also, Jess is also in a new position at work, which means I'm taking a little
• 21:30
  more responsibility at home, whereas he used to share some of it.
• 21:34
  Now he's going to be out in the field, you know, like a normal person working
• 21:38
  until five, you know, and so I've got carpool duty every day.
• 21:43
  Like, you know, there are other tasks. And so I'm like, okay, what is my new flow?
• 21:49
  And so that is something I'm really still working through because it is,
• 21:52
  I mean, right now, this recording, we're not even halfway through January. And so,
• 21:57
  I'm trying to figure it out, but it is a goal that I have.
• 22:00
  It's something I'm really leaning into because I know with discipline,
• 22:03
  now, not drill sergeant, not forcing, not, you know, suffering.
• 22:10
  Those aren't the words I'm talking about, but discipline, which we all need
• 22:16
  in areas of our lives, right?
• 22:18
  I know that discipline is going to be what helps me turn that corner, what helps me,
• 22:26
  do the things that I'm setting out to do, right?
• 22:29
  Instead of spinning my wheels or procrastinating myself to death,
• 22:33
  missing, you know, goals, missing deadlines, missing, you know.
• 22:38
  A lot just because I didn't buckle down and do what I set out to do, right?
• 22:45
  So that's something I'm really leaning into after I spent a whole year of healing
• 22:49
  and just trying to be zen and trying not to put too much pressure on myself,
• 22:53
  which I do think I needed that season so much,
• 22:57
  you know, and now I can, I can walk into this next season whole without the
• 23:03
  pressure, but with again, that balance that I talked about earlier.
• 23:07
  And so that leads me to my next one, which is alignment.
• 23:10
  Okay. And so that is a little different than the discipline,
• 23:14
  because I think over the past few years, I've, there are some things in my life
• 23:19
  that feel just a little out of balance. They feel a little misaligned.
• 23:24
  Some things in the business specifically, some things in day-to-day routine,
• 23:30
  some things in the way that I communicate with, you know, some people in my life.
• 23:38
  It's like there's just some things that don't feel, especially after I have,
• 23:42
  you know, had such a powerful 2025, right?
• 23:46
  When you go through such a massive change like that.
• 23:48
  There are going to be things that stay the same in your life.
• 23:52
  And now you're like, wait, I can't unsee what I've already seen.
• 23:55
  So I've got to adjust so that everything feels comfortable now.
• 24:01
  And so that's really where I'm at. There's some decisions in the business that
• 24:05
  I'm like, golly, what do I want to do here?
• 24:08
  Because I know I don't feel aligned in these areas. Right.
• 24:12
  But I don't know what's going to get me to alignment, you know?
• 24:16
  And so that is something that I'm really just praying on.
• 24:19
  I am going to sit in. I'm going to, you know, beg the Lord to reveal to me, you know what I mean?
• 24:25
  So that then I can't be disciplined, right, to do the things that I need to
• 24:31
  do to then get that area of my life fully aligned.
• 24:36
  And you know, y'all, when we feel fully aligned with something,
• 24:39
  everything just comes easier. Everything just feels more peaceful, more joyful, right?
• 24:45
  And so I just really have that focus this year of, okay, this is where we've come.
• 24:51
  You know, this is how far we've come. This is where we've been.
• 24:54
  These are the changes we've seen. And so what is next?
• 24:58
  Like, what is next so that we can be fully aligned after all these shifts and
• 25:04
  changes have happened over, you know, the past?
• 25:07
  And so I've been really
• 25:10
  talking to chat GPT about this and about my word for
• 25:13
  the year and all the things and so I liked I
• 25:16
  liked how chat defined alignment okay and he he defined it as living in harmony
• 25:22
  with who you are with a clarity of direction with confident choices with contentment
• 25:31
  in where you stand and gratitude for the path.
• 25:35
  So it's like alignment doesn't mean you know exactly like what's going to come of the effort, right?
• 25:43
  Or what's going to come of you going in this direction.
• 25:47
  But it means you know this is the direction you need to go right now.
• 25:51
  You're comfortable there.
• 25:53
  And you're just so happy and you're so thankful. Maybe not happy all the time,
• 25:57
  but you're thankful. You have the gratitude for the fact that you're on this path right now.
• 26:04
  You know, and that can be across the board, right?
• 26:07
  Like motherhood is not always easy and we don't always feel, you know, valued.
• 26:14
  And, you know, it doesn't, it's not always rainbows and butterflies,
• 26:18
  but we can still be thankful. We can still have gratitude for the things that
• 26:23
  it's taught us along the way, right?
• 26:26
  And so that could be said for anything, right?
• 26:29
  Even a job that you hate. if you
• 26:32
  have a job that or if you had a job that you hated
• 26:35
  like and now you can so look back right and
• 26:38
  have gratitude for the things it taught you if not about that specific trade
• 26:43
  it it taught you a lot of things about yourself probably or about managing other
• 26:49
  people and so I just I want to feel that full alignment with my day-to-day,
• 26:58
  my direction after a year of really kind of like unraveling and unpacking and
• 27:06
  looking back on misalignment and, you know, digging in deep.
• 27:10
  You know, now I am so fully ready to truly get into alignment as I move forward.
• 27:16
  And then my last word is contentment. Okay. And so again, kind of along the
• 27:21
  same lines, but kind of not.
• 27:23
  Last year was a lot about like undoing things, which meant that I was uncomfortable a lot.
• 27:31
  Like if I think about 2025, it was mainly discomfort because I was learning
• 27:37
  a lot about myself, right?
• 27:41
  And I was learning that I was going
• 27:44
  against who I knew myself to be for 37 years. You know, like I was...
• 27:51
  I was learning about who I truly was and how vastly different that actually
• 27:58
  was from how I was behaving for the past, you know, however many years, right?
• 28:03
  And so it was very uncomfortable because like when you adopt someone,
• 28:09
  traits and when you create habits and reactions and, you know,
• 28:15
  rhythms and routines that all reflect this person that you've just kind of created
• 28:23
  out of the chaos, but not created because it's who you truly are and want to be at your core.
• 28:29
  It just feels like you're sitting in a hot room sweating a lot.
• 28:34
  You know, as you're having to look at that and face that.
• 28:38
  And so, you know, up until this past, you know, year, you know, anxiety has defined me.
• 28:46
  A producer, being a producer, someone who just cranks stuff out,
• 28:50
  someone who just does it all and buzzes around and, you know,
• 28:53
  whatever, that has defined me, right?
• 28:55
  A pleaser, like someone who is always going
• 28:58
  to try to please you even though I know it's like against
• 29:02
  like what I truly feel inside you
• 29:05
  know that that is who I was up until this last year
• 29:08
  and a control freak you know these were all traits about me but yeah I mean
• 29:13
  I'm not gonna say they like don't just sit there waiting to come out right but
• 29:18
  they were those things were created from a life of not being aligned number one,
• 29:27
  you know, not being regulated.
• 29:30
  Definitely not moving slow, right?
• 29:34
  Those things were created out of fear. They were created out of hurry.
• 29:38
  And so last year was full of a lot of discontentment.
• 29:44
  And so this year, I really want to get comfortable with where I am.
• 29:50
  You know, I want to get I want to get comfortable with who I am,
• 29:54
  no matter like what that looks like, you know.
• 29:59
  And so, again, that is something that is is really hard for any of us after
• 30:03
  we've spent so long living.
• 30:05
  Believing and performing and, you know, acting a certain way.
• 30:12
  And so, you know, I think because for me, I always was like,
• 30:18
  if I get this done, if I hurry up and get this done, or if I mark all my stuff
• 30:22
  off my to-do list, or if, you know, they're happy with me and I get 100 A plus,
• 30:27
  you know, then I can be content.
• 30:29
  And that's a race that you're going to always be running, sis,
• 30:33
  you know. And so now, for me, it's really, I'm just really trying to focus in
• 30:38
  on being content, even though my checklist isn't all checked off, right?
• 30:42
  Even though I haven't gotten all the things that I need to get done actually
• 30:46
  done, you know, can I still be okay with that?
• 30:50
  Can I still be comfortable with that? Can I still, like, believe I have worth
• 30:55
  and, like, love myself through that?
• 30:58
  And so that's a practice that, you know, again, this is all still really new to me.
• 31:03
  And so that's a practice that I really feel like I need to lean into hard this year and not let it.
• 31:10
  You know, go by the wayside. Because again, I'm having a baby mid-year and there
• 31:15
  is nothing like a sleep deprived mama who starts to, you know,
• 31:19
  get on a rampage and think she's got to do all the things and be all the things
• 31:22
  because she's got to catch up and she's got to get the baby to sleep and blah, blah, blah.
• 31:24
  And so it's going to be a real challenge to myself to really just try to stay
• 31:29
  content regardless of what direction I go.
• 31:35
  You know, because I can't control it and I'm not going to try to control it
• 31:40
  in the ways that I have in the past.
• 31:43
  And then still finding contentment there, right? And I think that one's going
• 31:47
  to be a really big one for me.
• 31:49
  So anyway, these were just a few things that have just been like ruminating in me.
• 31:55
  And like, I'm just like, oh my gosh, what is one word for, you know, all of this?
• 32:00
  I will say that probably alignment, like some of you, like I told y'all,
• 32:04
  some of these kind of bleed into each other. And so I think,
• 32:08
  you know, alignment would be a really good one across the board for it all.
• 32:15
  But I don't know. We'll see. We'll see if that's if that's the word that I end up landed on for 2026.
• 32:22
  So anyways, I hope you guys enjoyed this one.
• 32:25
  I hope, you know, it inspired you to kind of think about your life in the same
• 32:29
  way, because, man, as as powerful as 2025 was for me, I would I don't want to
• 32:36
  go back there, y'all. I don't want to go back there.
• 32:39
  I learned so much and I'm so thankful for it.
• 32:43
  Again, I have that gratitude for it, even though it was really hard.
• 32:48
  It healed me so much. It helped me so much just to get comfortable in being who I am.
• 32:55
  But I am really, really excited to see what that work can can now produce out of 2026.
• 33:04
  So anyway, as always, y'all say grace.