Latest / Peace in a Pod / Thought-full Thursday: Recharging

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Thought-full Thursday: Recharging · Peace in a Pod

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Thank you for tuning in to this month's special edition.
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Of thoughtful Thursday with Co host ryair welcome back soul
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tribe probably noticed that it has been.
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Quite some time since we have done a good thoughtful.
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Thursday episode and there's a reason for that, as always
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stated in. Regular Peace in the Pod
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episodes. Self-care is very important.
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We got to make sure we're taking care of our bodies.
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You got to make sure you're taking care of your your mind,
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your emotions, your spirituality.
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If we're not in good places for ourself overall, we are no good
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to anyone else to be able to be a service to them.
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So taking time out for ourself is highly important.
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And today we're back after a little break, not necessarily a
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break from each other, but a break just to kind of regroup
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and get ourselves together with life and, and try to get our,
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you know, our mental, emotional, physical, spiritual selves back
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as a whole. And sometimes you just need that
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time to recharge in order to carry on for yourself, not just
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for others. So, yeah, so we're back at it.
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Sometimes it can be hard when you feel like you're not
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available for other people and you kind of get in that place of
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like, you feel like you're letting folks down where rather
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than you looking at, at it and a way of you trying to get
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yourself charged up and, and in a good place to be of that
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service for someone else to, to, to be available for that person.
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And sometimes you, you know, you get in this place where you're
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just, you're always that person that's like, you know, they know
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they could call me, they know they can reach out to me if
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they're, if they're going through something, I, you know,
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you, you're just that person that is there.
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And sometimes when you're not there, it can be hard on you and
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you kind of feel that little bit of guilt of like not being
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available. But I mean, once I think once
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you understand that you have to take care of yourself in order
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for you to be able to be available for other people.
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I think once we get past that and understand that we have to
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be in a good place, then we can be available to others.
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Because if we're not, we're just basically just draining
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ourselves even more to the point where that person's going
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through something and we're like barely there mentally or
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emotionally because we got our own stuff going on.
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So we're not really giving, you know, that 100% that we know
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that we could give. So, you know, I just, I don't
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know sometimes. I I do.
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Feel like when I'm not available to friends, I mean I do reach
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out but it may be a little time in between me reaching back out
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to them. But that's because I have to
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take care of myself and I try not to allow that to tear me
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down inside as like not being as good friend or not being like
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there for them like I used to. But sometimes it can be tough.
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Showing up in a certain manner. So it was like when I have to
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put myself first, is it selfish? Is it selfish that I'm doing it?
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Not that it is. I don't know how to really
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explain it. Like it's not that it's selfish,
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it's just like, I don't know the balance and maybe I get to
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thinking for the other person too.
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They maybe they feel this way or maybe they feel that way, or
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maybe I could do more showing up even at a time I feel like I'm
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putting myself in isolation and I don't know, like right now I
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just man, I'm just, I'm in a, a spot in my life where it's like
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it's a hard spot. I'm really trying to figure out
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something big and I don't need the influence of other people's
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problems or other people's anything.
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You get what I'm saying? Not that it's even anything bad.
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It's just like, man, I'm trying to work on myself.
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I'm trying to work on my habits. I'm trying to work on all the
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things. And I don't want all the things
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that I'm working going to even in some way, at the smallest, be
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influenced by anybody else. Because I feel like right now is
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the time for me to worry about me.
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Yeah, but I'm just feeling bad on whether or not I'm being
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selfish. Well, you can't put others
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before yourself because if you're not in a good place, how
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can you be there for the people that you want to help?
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You won't be in the right place, right state of mind to even be
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available. And you don't want to put all
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your energy into others and put nothing into yourself.
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So you just, I mean, I don't think it's selfish, but I did
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kind of go a little bit through the feeling selfish.
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And I do sometimes I feel like, I do feel like some people, like
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you say, feel like they're being neglected when I choose to make
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myself a priority. And I try to explain it that I'm
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not. And that's the problem.
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And I, and I think that's, that's a problem with me too, is
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like, I don't want to have to explain something that I'm
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trying to work through myself. You give what I'm saying because
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if I speak when it's not time for me to speak, you're not
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going to have the perception that I want to give.
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Yeah. And you're not going to have the
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perception of like, I don't know, like I think that
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sometimes I find myself like, let me hurry up and rush my
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progress to get back to serving other people.
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You get what I'm saying? So they could be fulfilled.
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And they don't think certain ways about the sabbatical that
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I'm going on. You get what I'm saying.
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Sometimes I feel like myself, I try to put a time limit on my
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going through or my figuring out.
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And sometimes it's to the point where I'm like, what, what, how
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do the people that do have friends, mm hmm.
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That literally fall off the face of the earth and nobody hears
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from them? Like how does that affect
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relationships? Like are the relationships OK?
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Like, could they just, could they just do that?
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You know what I'm saying? And that's sometimes what I want
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to do. Like I don't want to say run
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away as if like something really, really bad is happening.
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But I feel like running away would give me the space that I
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need to figure out me. Yeah.
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And sometimes I feel I'm conflicted with feeling those
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things too because it's running away quote UN quote solving
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problems. If like are am I resting or am I
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doing the work or am I resting and doing the work?
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Sometimes I'm always so burnt out.
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I don't know if I'm supposed to be resting or doing the work.
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And sometimes doing the work ain't like straight up physical.
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You know what I'm saying? Like it's mental and that's come
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on, you go I I. I don't think, I don't think
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it's running away though. I think it's just taking some
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time to reflect to to refresh, regroup, recharge and get build
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your energy back up because when you're constantly there for
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people, it is draining. And, and I don't mean it in a
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bad way, I just mean it, it is it can take a toll on your
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mental, physical and emotional state because you're constantly
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trying to help them. I want.
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To I want to make sure you're OK.
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And I think that sometimes just making sure somebody else is OK
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is usually like the first the forefront of your service rather
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than making sure you're OK and then making sure the other
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person is OK because you always want to quote UN quote, like
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show up. Like you feel like it's the
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right, It's, it's, it's friendship, it's family, It's
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all of the things like I want to be able to show up.
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Yeah, and it's in my character to show up.
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So when I'm no longer showing up, like I don't know, is my
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character question. Like I'm a overthinker.
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So I'm overthinker. I put the pressure on like I put
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the pressure on myself. I probably do it worse than
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anybody else. Like nobody is probably thinking
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the things that I'm thinking, but it's I get that.
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I just be thinking it because of the way that I am and how I show
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up and like you would expect, you would expect me to be always
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the happy one because I'm always the happy 1.
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You feel what I'm saying? Like you would expect me to be
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always the one that's a listening ear because I'm always
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the listening ear. And I know for myself, I will
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push the limits until the limits can't be pushed.
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And then I'm crashing out. Yeah.
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And nobody knows that I'm crashing out.
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I'm the only person that knows that I'm crashing out.
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And they didn't even know that I was like barely burying their
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things. Not that they're getting on my
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nerves. Not that it's just, it's just
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life. Just be life enough.
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Right, right. And I think that's why you have
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to take time for yourself so that you don't crash out.
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I think that's that's why the importance of self-care comes
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in. So when you mentioned about
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like, running away or, or like pulling away from people, it
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made me think about my friendship with my bestie,
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Vicki. Yeah.
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And how we, I mean, we live in two different places.
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It's been years now since we've seen each other.
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But and we, we used to talk every single day, multiple times
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a day when I first left. And now it's to a place where we
9:47
talk every couple months or so. But when we do talk, it's not
9:52
like any time was lost. It's the only way to explain it.
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And I think because of we, the understanding of our friendship,
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how we both value the friendship.
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It's not like she feels neglected or I feel neglected
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now. I miss her.
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I miss her all the time. But there are things going on in
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our lives that we just can't spend that as much time as we
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used to talking on the phone or being in person hanging out.
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So I think if if you have the right people around you.
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There'll be understanding. Exactly.
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And that's how how you, I think that's how you'll be able to
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kind of see the difference between people who just want
10:31
your energy and people who value you and your energy.
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I guess my level of control is like, I'm hoping that these
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would be the people who would be understanding, you know, having
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confidence that even if they'd be like, I'm understanding that
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I believe that they're understanding.
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You know what I'm saying? Sometimes I don't take things
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for like just kind of like face value, like having the
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conversation and then things being said.
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Like I sometimes I may still overthink these things you what
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I'm saying because like I would really want, and I, I think it's
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just so much passion and having so much care for, you know, like
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other people. Like no, like, I know that
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you're saying like you get it, but like I really would hope
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that you would get it because I would not want this to strain
11:22
the relationship. And I wish that you would
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understand. You get what I'm saying that
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listen, like this is just, and sometimes I don't be feeling
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like that. And, and I don't, it sounds just
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so horrible because maybe if I was having a conversation with
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my, one of my friends and she was just like, you know,
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sometimes you just got to let people like show up for you.
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And I was just like, I just be trying.
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But it's like, I have like a, a hard hold on, you know, just
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like certain things that I'm like, I haven't been able to
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release yet. And some things is just like, or
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sometimes it's like I got to, I got to wait options on who, who
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I will release it to, you know what I'm saying?
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And I don't know, I feel like I'm a better friend.
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We're just showing up. And I'm also a better friend
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being distant too. And you know, and I do have a
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lot of friendships where I'm distant with the the person.
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Like we don't always talk on the phone.
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Like we don't always text. We don't always meet up.
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But like when we do, it's just like, oh, I'm so happy to see
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you. Like I needed this.
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Sometimes I just need those friendships where it's just like
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that. Doesn't require any maintenance.
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Yeah, yeah. And I and I, I don't know if
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that's lazy, but I. Think that's more of just like a
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genuine the the realness of the friendship you that like they're
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not, it's not really like a they're dependent on you in
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order to make it, but they enjoy when you are around you bring a
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little more life and and and happiness into their
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environment. I guess that's what my mind is
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like, stuck on thinking that people are dependent on me.
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And I just, I just think that through just like repetition of
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what my relationships have been. You give it, I'm saying like I'm
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not much of A talker. Like if I'm going through
13:14
something, oh man, I'm I'm dead silent.
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Yeah. I'm not really saying anything
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like. And then it it, it didn't.
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One day it may just be like a sign and I just, I just said
13:24
this big thing like, oh, nobody do.
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But I was going through this thing like I'm just not a talker
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and. And sometimes you got to be
13:32
careful when you're talking about stuff because some people
13:35
are, you know, may not be for you and they might be hoping
13:39
some worse things come out of that rather than things get
13:42
better. So I mean, me, I proceed with
13:44
caution and I'm very similar to you.
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I don't share a lot of things that's going on.
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I try to keep it to myself, work it out.
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And once I get past that point, then I'll talk a little more
13:57
about it, but I don't like to. Just put it out there.
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I'll be in isolation so long. So the reason why I feel like
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people are dependent on me is because how I show up, like in
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ways that I've seen that I've contributed to their life.
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Like when they need a ear, like even if it's like the same
14:15
things, like I'll be the ear. You get what I'm saying?
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So that's why I believe that sometimes people have a
14:21
dependency on me. And maybe the the dependency
14:24
isn't bad, like I'm using you, but I know that I can talk to
14:28
you. And sometimes just that just
14:31
being available is literally sometimes too much for me.
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Sometimes I do not want to be available, and it's not that I
14:40
don't care, it's not that I don't want to hear, but I just
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don't want to be in use right now.
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I. Don't and there's nothing wrong.
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With that in service right now, then I think that that's the
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thing that beats me up or feeling like I'm selfish to
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think those things. And you're letting someone down
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when? You do it but.
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You're not, you're not, and you just have to get out of your
15:00
head on that and just know that sometimes you need some time for
15:03
yourself and hopefully those individuals, when you do
15:08
eventually get in touch with them, will understand that.
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Yeah. I mean, you can only do so much,
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but you can't like put your all into other people and not do
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anything for yourself. Yeah, that's that's every bit of
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the truth. I guess I got to.
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I mean, I got to hear it, see it, believe it, breathe it, eat
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it, sleep it, you know, because sometimes it's just not the way
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that my mind works and I'm just and I'm just like, I overthink
15:41
her. I don't want any strained
15:43
relationships. I don't want but I just lately.
15:47
I take that weight off yourself. Lately, I just don't want to
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break. Yeah, Like, it's not like a
15:52
crazy break. It's not like a let's say it for
15:55
the. Because this piece of the pie,
15:56
this is not a suicidal break, guys, You know, this isn't
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anything like that. It's just like I'm tired.
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And truth of the matter is I feel like I get to be tired, you
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know, like all this, you know, all these ways that I show up
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for myself, for others, all these goals that I try to chase,
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all these things that I want to commit to say yes to, don't do
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all of the things. Like, I just want to be like, I
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don't want to hear nothing. I don't want to see nothing.
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I don't want to be seen. Yeah.
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And that's just where I am. I'm.
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And I don't see anything wrong with that.
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We all should have those moments where we can feel like there's
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nothing wrong with taking time out for yourself and there isn't
16:52
anything wrong with that. Let me come and no one.
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Should kill you though. No one should even make you feel
16:56
bad about taking time for yourself, and if they do, that's
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probably someone you should reevaluate being in your circle
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if they're making you feel bad for taking care of yourself.
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Yeah, Yeah, that's the truth. See, I don't have anything to
17:12
say, but it's just that's the truth because, you know,
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sometimes you just have like the knowing and then you have the
17:19
emotion of things. So you're wrestling with the
17:21
knowing that you deserve these things and you should be this
17:25
and you should do that. And then you have the the
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emotion of things. It's just like, should I feel
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this way? Yeah.
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And why do you feel this way? And how do you feel this way?
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Yeah. You know, so I just been
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spending a lot of time and like dissecting piece of the pie.
17:44
I had a birthday not too long ago.
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I turned 30 Happy birthday. Thank you And I don't know it's
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like I can't really tell you like how the signs are are
17:56
coming across for me to do certain things and to be
18:00
obedient to God in certain ways. And I don't know, like I'm just
18:05
like, I know it looks like I just stepped into 30, but I feel
18:10
like I've been in preparation to turning 30 for a very long time
18:14
mentally. And right now I'm just trying to
18:17
take all of it in. I'm trying to take all of it in
18:22
on my 30th. Like at first I was overthinking
18:25
everything, like how should I arrive into 30?
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What should 30 look like for me? And when I showed up, I had a
18:33
birthday dinner. And when I showed up to my
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birthday dinner, I was just like, I just want to be free.
18:37
Like, I just don't want to have a care in the world.
18:40
And even during that time, I was like pretty much in isolation.
18:43
I hadn't been surrounded myself with anybody.
18:45
I was just like, you know what? Like, this is what I want to do.
18:48
Like I have to get out of the house.
18:49
I got to like, give myself a break for my own thoughts.
18:53
And that day, I just felt so free.
18:55
And after the birthday, I was just like, OK, right back to it.
18:58
I had to get back in my hole. I want to be in my hole.
19:00
I want to be in my own space. And there is nothing wrong with
19:04
that. Yeah.
19:06
So how do you feel like you've been navigating your mental
19:13
battles or you know, when you do your overthinking and things
19:16
Like I know earlier you mentioned just kind of being at
19:19
a place of seeing and not being overwhelmed by your thoughts and
19:24
your emotions. Like how did you feel like you
19:26
overcame that? Well, honestly, there are waves
19:30
of like self doubt in some of the decisions I've made.
19:36
But then there are moments where I know that this is the path I'm
19:41
supposed to be on. I know that I the choices I've
19:43
made or the choices that needed to be made at that moment.
19:46
And I don't regret the decisions I've made.
19:48
But there are moments where there is a little bit of self
19:52
doubt coming in like should have I have really done that?
19:57
Like I really don't know what's coming next.
19:59
And I think that's that little bit of fear.
20:02
Trying to sneak in throw me off. Already just.
20:06
And when, whenever that happens, honestly, I just so yesterday I
20:12
was feeling good in the morning, I was feeling real good.
20:14
And throughout the evening something happened.
20:17
I had some thoughts sneaking in. I don't know if I've seen
20:19
something on TV or what, or all I know is something happened and
20:23
in my brain just went to this like, girl, what are you doing?
20:27
And then I'm just like, I don't know, I started like freaking
20:30
out a little bit. I had to like ground myself and
20:34
I did some heavy praying to get myself back on track because
20:37
that was like a a few minutes of like, am I doing what I need to
20:43
be doing right now? Like, what in the heck am I
20:46
doing? But I was able to get myself
20:48
back on track. So by the night time, I was good
20:51
to go. So this morning I woke up like
20:54
blessings are on the way and I cannot wait.
20:57
What I'm getting from that is just, I don't know, you just
21:02
have to endure, yeah. And we're human, so everything's
21:06
going to come in waves. And you just have to, to, to
21:10
allow your mental to not let the, the, the, the doubts come
21:17
in and take over. Yeah, you have to stay strong
21:20
mentally and prevent that. Try to prevent that as much as
21:23
you can. Yeah, I guess.
21:26
I guess that's where I am too. It's just it's coming in waves.
21:31
It's coming in waves. And, and a part of my isolation
21:36
is like, I'd rather already be covered when the wave comes than
21:41
to just be out here before it even gets here.
21:44
So I'd rather just, like, be by myself and just, like, figure
21:48
out my, my own emotions and worry about my own things
21:52
because when it's time to seek shelter, I don't really want to
21:55
just kind of disappear abruptly. You know, that's just kind of
21:59
how I think about things. But I guess I'm the same way.
22:03
Sometimes I feel like, been measuring the time, like, all
22:08
right, you got you. You got this amount of time to
22:11
make this happen or to, you know, put yourself in this
22:14
position. And that's so stressful.
22:18
Yeah, I don't always want to have to be ready.
22:21
You get what I'm saying? Like, I know that sounds, that
22:24
sounds a little crazy, but like I was like, it's just you just
22:28
always on guard. You just always clenched up in
22:34
preparation for something to happen, Like, and I don't want
22:37
that stress on my shoulders. I don't want that stress on my
22:39
mind. I don't want to feel like I have
22:42
failed myself by the decisions that I made.
22:45
Like, I don't want to beat myself up based off of the
22:48
things that at when I was feeling at the time.
22:51
And not that the feelings are still not valid.
22:53
Just having to weather the storm.
22:56
Jesus. I don't be 1.
22:58
I don't want to have to weather the storm.
23:00
That's just that's that's sometimes.
23:02
Yeah, Nah. So since you're bringing up
23:05
storms, so I was a little Mia and of course, people I'm sure
23:12
have noticed that we have not recorded, recorded a thoughtful
23:16
Thursday session in quite a while.
23:19
Taking some time off for ourselves is important.
23:23
Yes, I enjoy recording, but I'm not here to pressure you or
23:28
anyone into doing any episodes just for the sake of doing an
23:32
episode. And I needed some time for
23:34
myself. So the path that I'm on, I am
23:38
seeking independence is really the only way to explain it.
23:45
So for me, and part of how I was able to get through some of the
23:50
things that I've, I've managed throughout life is reflecting
23:55
inward because a lot of times we want to like try to fix a
23:59
problem and not really look at like what's happening
24:01
internally. And sometimes when there's an
24:05
issue, it's not about the issue. It, it might be trying to alert
24:09
us of something about ourselves that we need to look at.
24:12
So with that time that we weren't recording together and
24:17
just over the past few months, I have been like deep into, into
24:21
some thoughts of and ideas and I'm always talking about
24:25
journaling and like changing your perspective on how you
24:30
handle situations. And it, it got me to this place
24:34
where I created the self help guide and I, I will have the
24:39
link in the description. I also created some daily
24:42
journals for people to get their journaling out.
24:46
But the self help guide, it's called Thriving through chaos, a
24:50
guide to finding strength in life's storms.
24:54
So in this self help guide, I broke down situations like how
25:02
first of all, how a situation starts.
25:05
And this is, this could be personal, it could be
25:07
professional. Whatever you're facing, this guy
25:10
will be able to help you evaluate the situation and
25:13
maneuver through it and not feel defeated in any situation that
25:18
you're you're facing a. Step process.
25:22
A step process. I think that we, we often times
25:27
take a look at like the bigger picture and never get down to
25:31
the roots cause something stemmed from somewhere.
25:36
And I think that that's why there's got to be really helpful
25:40
because it stops us in our tracks to take a look at the
25:44
road ahead of us, like to really see what, how did we get here?
25:50
And listen, it was definitely something that I needed because
25:54
I get ahead of myself all the time.
25:57
I overthink all the time. Listen, I just overthought the
26:00
1st 15 minutes of the podcast about the things that I feel.
26:04
And sometimes we just need to redirect and reposition
26:08
ourselves in order for us to see what we really need to be
26:11
seeing. Yeah, our minds could definitely
26:15
play tricks on us, definitely make us believe things.
26:20
Sometimes we think about so much that it becomes fact.
26:23
And truth of the matter is it was never a fact.
26:26
Yeah. So yeah, thriving through chaos.
26:31
It, it took a lot of, a lot of sitting down note taking to try
26:40
to put into words just a way of maneuvering through chaos.
26:45
Because man, I mean, sometimes it, it can really take a toll on
26:50
you. Just dealing with life and not
26:53
having a way of evaluating certain situations can it can be
26:58
hard, especially if you don't have a support system around
27:01
you. If you are the person who's
27:03
providing all the support, then what?
27:05
Yeah. So it's like, well, who's
27:07
helping me get through stuff? So I didn't create the guide
27:11
just for myself. I did create it for other people
27:14
who are going through situations to just kind of have a different
27:17
view. And there's questions in there
27:19
to help you bring up whatever it is that you're, you're, you're
27:23
facing and how you viewed it. And then there's questions to
27:27
help you change how you're viewing it.
27:29
And there's a few exercises and some, a few pages for notes, but
27:36
I wanted to just be able to create something that was an
27:39
overall help through any situation that life throws at
27:43
us. And there's some affirmations, a
27:46
couple quotes in there just to kind of keep you on the right
27:48
track and keep you motivated and, and getting to where you
27:53
need to get to in life without the stressors of challenges
27:58
really. Yeah, yeah, 'cause listen, I
28:06
need all of that. I need all of that.
28:09
I need all of that. I am just I just been trying to
28:13
just build back up my strength physically and mentally,
28:18
spiritually, all of the things and listen, I sometimes I just
28:24
need a little help with with redirecting.
28:27
I'm glad that Loretta started this podcast because one me and
28:31
her have a lot of relatability. Relatability anyway, like we
28:35
work together, we experience some of the same things.
28:38
We've made similar decisions in our life and you know, we have
28:43
each other to talk to about those things.
28:45
That's like, OK, you get it. Yes.
28:48
And today I'm finally ready to talk because I know that she
28:51
gets it. And I'm.
28:54
I'm just, I'm just here. I'm just, I'm showing up.
28:57
And yeah, I don't. Yeah.
29:00
I think it's like really crazy that some of the stuff that
29:04
we've experienced almost simultaneously is kind of crazy
29:09
'cause it's like, how? How is someone else going
29:12
through staying there the same exact thing almost at the same
29:16
exact time? That's what we need though.
29:18
It's like that's what we that's that's what we need.
29:21
But you. Usually don't like know the
29:23
person first hand. That's that's I mean because we
29:25
were like sitting next to each other while when this first
29:28
started like when life really started throwing challenges hard
29:31
at us, we were like cubicle neighbors and then it just and
29:35
then it just kind of got here free.
29:39
Yeah, exactly, literally. And that's my point with the
29:43
whole like being independent, the independency is about living
29:49
life that is fulfilling for me and not living life for the way
29:55
other people say I should live life the way society says I
29:59
should live life or some boss says I should behave or.
30:03
And it's like, no, I want to live my happiest life and I
30:07
don't want to have the restrictions of someone telling
30:10
me that it's not right or someone telling me that what I
30:16
said or how I am is affecting. Yeah, yeah.
30:22
Others. When if I know I'm not doing
30:24
anything to harm myself or anyone else and me just being me
30:29
seems to to bother people, I know that it's because I'm
30:32
vibrating at a higher frequency and.
30:34
You know, I'm trying to, I'm trying to get with that.
30:37
Like I got a lot of confidence that I'm just me.
30:40
You know, my name is Ryair. If if y'all did not know and
30:46
y'all don't know another one. And I think that is just so much
30:49
power in that like it's I'm me. And I think that that's
30:54
sometimes why I stray away from people as well is because and
30:59
people are just people. And I really don't want to be
31:02
perceived. Like, I want to be like, let me
31:05
be Casper or somebody like, I don't want to be perceived.
31:08
I don't want you to think that, you know, I don't want you to
31:11
influence other people to believe that you think that, you
31:14
know. Yeah.
31:18
Like I just, I don't know, like I just want to be free and
31:21
independent to, to the place where I'm just like, I don't
31:26
want to be influenced or be an influencer, to be honest with
31:30
you. Sometimes that's how I feel.
31:31
I don't, I won't say it all the time, but yeah, people are
31:35
people. So I try to stay out of the way
31:37
of people. I don't know how how much that
31:40
makes sense when you have to live a life to encounter people,
31:42
but that's how much I've been wanting to be unseen, that I
31:46
don't want any. I don't want any dealings.
31:49
I think that I've had enough work, you know, bad friendships,
31:54
bad relationships, bad experiences with just people
31:58
that I'm just like, man, I'm. Tired of people?
32:01
You know, that's it. I'm so tired of people I don't
32:05
know. I'm getting to a place now where
32:07
sometimes I'm like, am I turned into like one of the weird ones?
32:11
No, you know, 'cause I'll say this, my friends circle has
32:15
gotten so much smaller and it's not that I'm just like wedding
32:19
out folks. It's just simply where I want my
32:22
energy and the energy I want around me.
32:24
There is a select few people that I feel like are not trying
32:29
to distract me from where I'm trying to get to talk me out of
32:34
my my goals and and my life path.
32:37
I feel like the people that I'm surrounded by, that I keep close
32:41
are the people that support me and encourage me.
32:47
And I don't, I don't really. I'm to a place that honestly,
32:51
I'm 42, about to be 43. Like, I don't know, in a couple
32:55
weeks actually. Wow.
32:57
I didn't realize we're already in August.
33:00
But I'm to a place where I do not care what people think of me
33:05
because my name and my reputation has been slandered
33:08
over the years by people who just don't like me.
33:11
Because they know that I am someone who could do great
33:14
things in life. And they don't want to see that.
33:16
It's whatever it is about me that puts them in this place of
33:19
where they feel like they need to talk bad about me, try to
33:22
convince other people that I'm a bad person.
33:24
That is something that they can live with and continue with.
33:27
And I literally do not care. I was, I was talking to my
33:31
friend the other day and I said something on the lines of I
33:37
can't change the recipe to a product that people already
33:41
have. Yeah, I'm, I'm forever changing,
33:44
you know what I'm saying? And if you choose to stick with
33:48
whatever perspective of know or knowing that you had of me then
33:52
and believe that I'm the same person as I was then that I am
33:57
now, then you're just wrong. I can't change the recipe to the
34:00
product that you already have. You know, you know, when
34:04
somebody buys something off the shelf like they could, they
34:07
could just they could tell the difference.
34:08
Oh, like they changed some of these recipes.
34:10
Like you either going to keep buying it or you ain't going to
34:13
keep sticking around or you know what I'm saying, sustaining the
34:16
relationship or whatever the case may be.
34:18
Or you going to say, well, I don't like this taste and I'm
34:23
going to go on about my business now that's just.
34:29
You can't. You can't change people's minds,
34:34
but people have the power to change their own situation and
34:38
their own mind and their own environment.
34:43
The question is, do they want to, do you want to, or are you
34:47
comfortable with the bad taste? I guess really the whole way to
34:52
put it. Oh, and sometimes I think that
34:55
people just need to get get just for themselves, not even just
35:00
like people like, are you tired of the bad taste?
35:04
You know, are you tired of constantly saying what you're
35:08
going to do and not doing it? Like, do you really want the
35:11
change that you want? Like, especially if you believe
35:14
that people are supposed to treat you accordingly to
35:16
whatever your thoughts are. Like, what are your actions?
35:18
Like? What are you showing up as?
35:19
Like, I think that's that's another thing to consider too.
35:25
I just want to be the best me that I could be.
35:29
I just, I would hope that people just believe that I'm a good
35:32
person, that my track record says that I am.
35:35
Even if I decide to go on sabbaticals and you don't see me
35:39
and I don't show up in the ways like, are you OK with this
35:42
product? Right.
35:43
And if you're not, I know I'm not OK with my own product.
35:47
I'm doing a lot of, I'm doing a lot of correcting and trying to,
35:52
you know, self development for myself because, you know, I'm
35:55
not satisfied, but you know. And every day we are every new
36:06
day we are a different version of ourselves from the previous
36:11
day. Yeah.
36:13
And it's either you're a better version or you're a worse
36:16
version. Depends on what choices you make
36:17
in life. But we're never the same person
36:22
as each day goes on and people who want to be in a stagnant
36:28
life where they stay the same person forever, that's a
36:32
personal choice. But there are people who have
36:35
goals for them, for themselves and their family of where they
36:38
want to be in a certain time frame.
36:42
And not that everything is going to work out in our time frame,
36:44
because that's that's up to God. But we can have a plan and kind
36:50
of Co create the plan to work out in our favor.
36:56
But each day we are a different person from the person we were
37:01
the previous day. And some people are not OK with
37:06
that. Some people want you stop
37:08
changing and stay who you were when I met you.
37:11
Like who are you? Like I'm on shelling a new
37:15
version of me that I haven't experienced before either.
37:18
So we're experiencing something that I haven't experienced
37:21
before. At the same time, you get what
37:24
I'm saying? Like, give me some grace.
37:26
Yeah. I'm trying to be gentle with me.
37:28
Be gentle with me, please. Like, be gentle with me, please.
37:32
But I also think to reinforce people, especially the
37:36
relationships that you have in my life.
37:37
And this was a thought that I had because sometimes my
37:41
isolation is good. Sometimes my isolation is bad.
37:44
Like when I really need to be surrounded by people, I choose
37:47
to be alone. But I realized sometimes it
37:51
could have an effect on my friendships and I, and I speak
37:54
about friendships and like the care that I have of not making
37:59
anybody feel some type of way. Like I, I, I, I should not
38:03
overthink it in the way, in the manner that I do, but I hope
38:06
that it comes off in the podcast is that you all understand the
38:10
how I feel about my friendships and the care that I actually do
38:13
have for them is a reason why I overthink some, you know,
38:17
sometimes. But also, I think that in order
38:21
for to sustain those relationships that you have in
38:24
your life, like the changes that you're trying to make, I think
38:28
that in a lot of times in my relationships, I change.
38:32
And no, you don't have to give. Give the people a heads up that
38:35
I'm changing. You give it, I'm saying, but
38:38
also to reinforce the changes or to enforce the changes that
38:43
you're making in your life. Those things have to be present
38:46
in the friendship. You get what I'm saying?
38:48
Like just say, for example, one of the things I think that I'm
38:51
struggling on is when I have a friend that's going through
38:55
something, because I'm their friend, I may sometimes tell
39:00
them what they want to hear to I affirm them in a way you give
39:03
it, I'm saying. But also me affirming them goes
39:06
against what I believe because I OK, I'm doing this work and
39:10
these are things that I believe. But because it's you and how you
39:14
operate, I give you what you feel like you need.
39:17
Yeah, you're tailoring the response.
39:18
Yeah, I'm tailoring the response and what I believe in order to
39:22
sustain the the friendship is to just show up with your changes
39:26
in that relationship and allow that person and to decide,
39:29
right. Sometimes I keep it away from
39:31
them because it's just like, OK, just say if, if, if that person
39:35
is a gossip and I'm no longer trying to gossip and I reinforce
39:39
you on your gossiping, how would you take the reinforcement of
39:43
your gossiping? Like, hey, like girl, you trying
39:46
to like you was just you get what I'm saying?
39:49
Like will you be, will you be met with a reminder of what you
39:52
used to do? You know what I'm saying?
39:53
Will it be accepting? Because like, girl, I know you
39:56
was this and I know you was that, But in order to kind of
39:59
like, you know, who's supposed to be around and who's not
40:01
supposed to be around because they'll be accepting of your
40:03
changes, They'll adjust and you won't feel like, you know, you
40:08
won't feel like it's, it's, it's pressure to be your old self and
40:12
your new self at the same time. And I think that that's
40:14
sometimes something that I struggle with.
40:16
I have a a relationship in my life right now where I.
40:21
Nothing bad against them, but things that I'm no longer trying
40:24
to be involved in, they do a lot of those things and I currently
40:32
am doing some of those things but no longer want to do some of
40:35
those things. And how do I, how do I show up
40:41
with this? Like I'll come to work the next
40:43
day with a new attitude. You get what I'm saying?
40:45
Like who is she that just got a promotion that think that she
40:48
can't do this thing anymore? You get what I'm saying?
40:51
And I'm, I think that I'm fearful of how relationships
40:54
will change in my life if I, if I make a stance on what I
40:58
believe, because one, if that is the, is that if that is the
41:03
foundation of the relationship, how much does it change the
41:06
relationship if that's how we connect?
41:08
Yeah. I think that's where, because my
41:12
approach, and this could be different for other people, but
41:14
my approach when in situations like that is I slowly transition
41:19
the conversation into something that is not like for instance,
41:23
the gossiping. I'll slowly transition that and
41:27
like, you know what? I don't even want to talk about,
41:28
you know, that person putting that energy into let's talk
41:30
about something a little more upbeat, a little more uplifting,
41:33
and I'll just transition the conversation into something else
41:35
because I don't want to put that energy into talking about people
41:38
or situations that are negative. So I just use that approach to
41:43
kind of guide the conversation elsewhere, but let them know I'm
41:47
not interested in that type of conversation, but being
41:51
straightforward, but also just gently, like changing the angle
41:56
of the conversation. Absolutely.
41:58
Because I'm not me. I I cannot sit here and be like,
42:02
somebody's gossiping and I'm like, girl, yeah, no, no.
42:06
And I'm guilty. And I've, I've had people who, I
42:10
have friends who have brought up situations that I don't like.
42:14
I don't like to speak names of people from negative situations
42:18
because I don't like to bring that energy.
42:20
I don't want it out in the universe where they're saying
42:21
that as an invite to come drop their thoughts or try to channel
42:25
into me or whatever they, they do.
42:27
I don't want to open that window for them to try to connect or
42:31
just putting that energy out into the, the universe.
42:33
So for me, I don't use people's names from bad situations.
42:37
I really don't even like to talk about this like the specific
42:40
person themselves, but I I'll just tell the person like, well,
42:44
their name's not important. Like they did what they did.
42:47
There's nothing I can do to change it.
42:49
That's pretty much what it is at this point.
42:51
I'm past that and I'm on to something else and I just kind
42:53
of leave it at that. So I just kind of feel like
42:56
being direct, like straightforward, what you're,
43:00
you're, what you stand for, but also just kind of guiding the
43:02
conversation somewhere else, but letting them know like that's
43:05
just not something they and. I feel like I and I and I I
43:09
totally 100 a thousand 2000% like you are right on the money.
43:16
I think it's that that second piece that if so much of what
43:23
I'm changing is what this relationship is, it would be
43:30
nothing. And maybe it wouldn't.
43:33
Maybe it would not be anything. Like maybe I'm overthinking it.
43:37
You get what I'm saying? Because OK, if you, if you, if
43:39
you don't have nothing to talk about, what do you talk about?
43:42
Like, OK, you find new things to talk about, but if this is this
43:45
is how we've connected, this is what we've always done.
43:50
And then one of this is what we've always done and there was
43:54
nothing in between that gives us like, let's give us give us
43:57
another leg to stand on. Where are we standing?
44:02
You hear what I'm saying? And I'm nervous about that and
44:07
not nervous to the I don't know, man.
44:09
I think that just been in my life where it's just like I'm
44:13
trying to lean into what whatever God is calling me to do
44:17
and I'm trying to find balance on how to be me, how to stand
44:23
firm in being me with other people.
44:26
Sometimes there will be moments that pop up that try to drag you
44:30
back into that environment of where you used to be and how you
44:34
used to be, and I think that's where you have to stand in who
44:39
you are. Yeah.
44:40
And not allow those people or that energy to pull you back.
44:44
Yeah. Because you're you've outgrown
44:46
that environment. Like you either coming with me
44:50
or like you don't have to or or maybe you'll see the changes in
44:54
me and and and be influenced by the changes you know I'm.
44:59
Always my hope. I'm thinking, yeah, and I think
45:01
that I'm thinking every perspective.
45:03
But, you know, often times the worst case scenario is the one
45:07
that gets highlighted because it's like, oh, like I don't, you
45:10
know, worst case scenario comes with another scenario, you know,
45:13
so when that happens, then you think about this and then you
45:15
navigate through this and I just just a, just a.
45:19
Thought No, I never really think into.
45:23
I'm overthinking. No, well, because I mean,
45:25
usually when you're in the conversation with someone,
45:27
you're not really thinking at that moment like I'm going to
45:29
tell them this you. It usually just kind of happens
45:31
like as like or it just happens organically.
45:34
Yeah. So for me it's not something
45:36
like, OK, when she call, I know she going to be talking about
45:39
this that like I don't know what whoever is calling going to talk
45:42
about. So for me, I go into the
45:44
conversation very open minded and whatever happens happens.
45:48
But I do have a friend who tends just to like bring up things
45:53
that are from the past or like negative things.
45:56
And I just kind of direct the conversation and I, I get very
46:00
clear that that's not something I want to put energy into.
46:03
And I get, I'm very clear on that and that I prefer to talk
46:06
about something else, you know, different energy of something.
46:10
And she's OK with that. And we just kind of move on.
46:13
And then we talk about, you know, some whatever it like if,
46:15
if she has some challenges, she's going through that, we'll
46:18
discuss that. Or if there's some good things
46:21
happening in life, we'll discuss like everything.
46:23
We just change the energy from the thing that I don't want to
46:26
go back to. Yeah.
46:28
And the fact that she is OK with that and we just continue the
46:32
conversation shows me that she is a person who is willing to
46:36
move on from those types of behaviors.
46:39
You got to give. You got to give the people a
46:42
opportunity. Yeah, yeah.
46:44
Because I don't, I don't ever go in thinking like, OK, right,
46:48
here we go. Now we'll say this like now, and
46:52
this is this. I probably shouldn't say it, but
46:55
I'm gonna say it anyway. So I was on, I was on the phone
46:57
with my mom the other day and she was like talking about
47:01
someone. And I'm like, Mama, OK, Like I'm
47:04
not trying to like sit here and badmouth people.
47:07
And I'm from Texas, so it's that that whole Southern, you know,
47:11
everybody, the neighbors know everybody.
47:13
Yeah, yeah. And so she's just kind of
47:15
telling me something and I'm just like, OK, yeah, I'm not
47:17
trying to put energy into this person.
47:20
Let's talk about something else. And then she was like, you know
47:22
what, you right, you right. Let's let's not even talk about
47:24
that person. And I'm like, God, already seen
47:26
the bad that they've done. It's not up for us to sit here
47:29
and talk about it like it's too. Much.
47:31
That's why I'll be feeling like it's just too much life to to
47:35
work and and OK, the fact that you can have those experiences
47:41
with people that would that's what makes me draw away from
47:45
people because people just be being people.
47:47
Like I'm just like, that's like my slogan.
47:49
People be being people. If people be being people with
47:52
other people stuff, baby, they being people about your stuff
47:58
too. That's why I say you can't share
47:59
everything with everybody. So I'm just like, and it's just
48:02
so much life going on that it's just like, I don't really want
48:06
to like slander anybody else for going through life because what
48:11
may not be in the hands of others, it's like I'm still
48:14
dealing with life too. And just imagine my life being
48:18
handed to someone else for them to gossip.
48:21
And that's why, you know, that's why I'm just like not
48:25
interested. Now maybe maybe there's not
48:28
really a distinction the way that I try to make it.
48:31
But I always say they're like, oh, I'm not a gossip, but like I
48:34
will talk some stuff. You know, when stuff just seem
48:37
like girl, like, you know, like, well, like boy, you already
48:40
know, like yeah, I probably say something.
48:42
So I don't know if you know, if it's just gossip all around and
48:45
maybe I need to correct myself. But to just straight up bad
48:50
mouth somebody that could like, I don't know, they live their
48:55
life a certain way based off of like a certain perception of
48:58
life that they have. And like, you know, it ain't my,
49:03
it ain't my job to like step in and talk about how they're
49:07
living life like, I don't know. And that's what just makes me
49:11
just like draw away from people. I I got too much to worry about
49:15
on my own to to be bringing up names about such and such, a who
49:19
did what and when they did it and how they did it like.
49:23
Right, right. I think if someone is living
49:26
their life how they see fit and they're not causing harm to
49:29
themselves or others, there should be no reason that someone
49:33
is passing judgment on how they're doing it.
49:36
Now if they're constantly complaining to you about some
49:39
things that aren't going well and you know how they just can't
49:43
seem to get past certain points in life.
49:47
I mean, it depends on if they're open to some honest feedback on
49:53
some changes they can make or not let.
49:55
Me ask this though, everybody wants honesty.
49:59
They say that that's the. Thing.
50:01
You get what I'm saying? Till they hear it.
50:03
Everybody wants someone to be honest.
50:07
They want true opinions. They want like, I don't know,
50:12
but do they really? Because sometimes, like, honesty
50:16
is not necessarily ugly, but it's already going to look ugly
50:19
when it's something that you don't want to hear.
50:22
I think it depends on it's. Like how you said how who says
50:26
it? Like I kind of feel like I ain't
50:28
going to say it don't matter because I wouldn't want the
50:29
wrong person to tell me something that was just truthful
50:32
because it's just like who are you?
50:34
You know, like you have a defense up, but do people really
50:38
want honesty? I think certain people want
50:41
honesty. I don't think everyone wants
50:43
honesty. I think there are a lot of
50:44
people who say they do and they actually don't.
50:46
The moment you drop that honesty on them, they're looking at you
50:49
like, what in the world? Why would you say that to me?
50:52
But then there are. People who are like, I
50:53
appreciate that. Yeah, like I I needed to hear
50:56
that and are like that stunned a little bit, but you're right.
51:01
I feel like I fall into the category, like I want people to
51:05
be honest with me because I'm projecting honesty and I would
51:11
like that in return. Yeah.
51:13
Because I don't like to beat around the Bush up.
51:15
Sometimes I can be extremely blunt and I don't like that
51:18
about myself. And that's something that I try
51:20
to tailor to certain friends because I don't want to hurt
51:24
anybody's feelings. That's not my angle.
51:27
I just want to be truthful, but I don't want to be hurtful.
51:31
So sometimes I do like tailor how I say things in order to not
51:35
be as blunt because I like to just get straight to the point.
51:38
I don't like to be beating around the Bush.
51:40
I just like whatever needs to be said or done.
51:43
Like let's just do it like stop dilly dallying around and and
51:47
get stuff done. So sometimes I do tailor how I
51:50
speak to certain friends in order to not hurt feelings, but
51:54
I am honest with what I say. I just say it differently,
51:59
different words I guess is the best way to.
52:00
Say, yeah, yeah, OK, I guess I I guess I could learn to be a
52:07
little bit more honest. I know it sound like I'm a liar
52:12
podcast, but it's not even that. It's not even that I'm a liar.
52:17
I think that I'm just like I I don't even want to say sugar
52:20
coat either. I'm just so nice.
52:23
I know it's hard to believe y'all, but it's like I'm so nice
52:29
that I would not want to offend anybody.
52:32
I would like to articulate what I'm trying to say in the most
52:35
cozy way that I could deliver this is possible that no, no
52:40
backlash comes behind this, That even honesty makes you feel
52:46
comfort. You know what I'm saying?
52:47
Like, I never want to say anything.
52:50
That's just like, I don't know, you know?
52:53
I mean, people, people, people can be sensitive.
52:55
So sometimes I will affirm somebody.
52:59
Yeah. And affirming people sometimes
53:02
in the wrong situations is not right.
53:04
Yeah. But I, I, I do it.
53:07
I do it 'cause sometimes it could be simpler.
53:10
I don't know if that makes me a bad friend, but I don't know,
53:15
Like it's not like I guess it would depend on the situation.
53:19
Like I'm just being affirmed because, you know, I got
53:23
friends. I'll let people know what it is
53:25
spiritually. I'll let them know biblically,
53:30
you know, and sometimes, you know, people don't want to hear
53:34
it in that manner, you know, because it's just like that's
53:38
already another thing to try to understand spirituality.
53:41
Like that's that's a whole nother thing to understand.
53:43
And also, I'm already trying to understand my situation.
53:46
Well, let me tell you about God, OK?
53:48
Because that's where I'll be with stuff.
53:49
Like that's just how I deal with stuff.
53:51
And you don't want to hear about God, man.
53:53
And here I'm going to give it right back to you.
53:57
Maybe sometimes I do it because I'm tired too.
54:02
Yeah, like I don't know what else to.
54:05
I mean, sometimes speaking spiritually makes people uneasy.
54:10
Yeah, it does. I don't really know why and and
54:17
people can believe in who or whatever they want.
54:21
Whatever you have your faith in, that is your business.
54:24
Yes, peace in the pod. Have peace in your pod.
54:28
Right. Like whatever, whatever you look
54:30
up to or whoever you look up to is your business.
54:33
There is no judgment in any shape, way or form.
54:37
But some people are uneasy when you start talking spiritually.
54:42
They don't want to hear that, and that's fine.
54:47
But they. You know the relationship that
54:51
you have with me, and you know that that's how I go about
54:53
situations and how I handle things.
54:55
That man, you really probably shouldn't really expect nothing
54:57
else other than me to give it to you the way that I know how to
55:00
give. It exactly.
55:03
So I won't even necessarily say that they're they're just
55:06
against it because I believe that, you know, I show people
55:11
who don't get a chance to experience God, like I think
55:14
that they experience him through me.
55:16
I am not perfect, but I try to be.
55:19
I try to perfect myself every single day.
55:21
I have not reached perfection. I wouldn't expect anybody to
55:25
expect that out of me. But I think it's just sometimes
55:29
where it's just like how they handle situations.
55:33
It may not be in in such of a spiritual manner, but they try
55:37
to use a lot of logic. Yeah.
55:39
And if if anybody follows out to God, they know that man, stuff
55:44
just don't be making sense. I'm just.
55:45
Yeah, stuff just don't be making sense.
55:47
Like you're called to do things, you're called away from certain
55:50
things, and sometimes it just don't make sense.
55:55
Yeah. And.
55:56
She came across someone I don't want to say came across.
55:59
We're friends, yeah. This podcast stuff is getting
56:02
gets crazy. I don't want to say came across
56:05
like we, we are friends. We talk periodically.
56:10
Like we don't always go deep, deep into stuff.
56:13
But when when we do, there's a little bit bit of hesitation
56:19
with her. When I I do bring up a little
56:24
spirituality, she's kind of like looking at me like girl.
56:28
And I think some people when they, they've been through so,
56:31
so many like hard things and bad things in their life that they
56:36
just kind of give up on believing.
56:40
And it's like, well, if there was someone up there out there
56:45
that's supposed to like, help me have this better life, then why
56:48
has my life been so crappy? So that, that, that faith and
56:52
that, that belief is just like so many things have happened to
56:56
them that they just kind of lost it.
56:58
But I'm going to say this. So I that conversation, last
57:01
conversation I had with her, I was able to kind of establish a
57:08
little bit of faith and hope in her.
57:10
We had a moment and I was just like, things are going to get
57:17
better. You just have to get out of that
57:19
mindset of everything bad is happening to me and it's going
57:22
to continue to happen to me because it's not.
57:25
Yeah, when you keep believing everything bad is going to
57:27
happen, everything bad is going to happen.
57:29
Like you've already put it up. Everything bad's coming here.
57:31
It comes today, tomorrow, every other day after that.
57:34
So it's like change that mind. You have to redirect yourself
57:39
every day. Like they say it takes 30 days
57:42
to, you know, like develop a habit.
57:44
Like you have to think the same thing mentally.
57:47
Like if you're not putting in some type of effort to redirect
57:51
what you think, redirect your emotions sometimes, like I said
57:55
earlier, like your mind, well, you didn't thought something so
57:58
much that you believe that it's fact and it's not a fact at all.
58:01
Like you have to catch yourself in a moment and redirect those
58:06
things in order to see changes start to happen in your life.
58:10
You get what I'm saying. And I think that sometimes
58:13
that's where I probably get now by no means I have to keep
58:17
saying it that I am that I am not perfect.
58:20
You you hear me saying that I struggled mentally sometimes and
58:23
I'm just such an overthinker, but I'm always trying to perfect
58:27
you give it. I'm saying that's why I spent so
58:29
much time by myself. And I think that sometimes I get
58:33
a little burnt out on other people's actions when like, all
58:37
right now, like, you know, you have to to be better at
58:40
something, you have to work at it being better at something.
58:44
And you can't constantly be repetitive in it.
58:46
And the fact that you are repetitive, right?
58:50
And maybe I handle something in a certain manner.
58:53
It's just like I get a little tired of it sometimes, Like, OK,
58:56
make some changes. Yeah, if you want to see some
58:58
changes, make some changes. Because when you're not changing
59:01
and we have this relationship that we have where quote, UN
59:07
quote, you're, you're dependent like Co dependent on me, then I
59:12
always have to hear about the changes that you're not making.
59:14
Yeah. And that's very tiresome.
59:16
Yep. Like that's.
59:19
I did an episode on changing your environment.
59:21
I wish you could see my face podcast right there is is
59:27
tiring. It's it's hiding if you're.
59:29
Not willing to make any changes. It's all love.
59:31
I just, you know, man, I just believe that man, you just got
59:36
to be, you know, get, get right with yourself.
59:38
You know, sometimes you may not know that, you know, you're
59:42
deflecting or you're pushing things off on other people.
59:46
You may not know the impact. And truth for the matter is,
59:48
man, especially when it comes down to relationship and I'm
59:51
speaking, I'm guilty. Maybe I should, you know, I
59:53
should say more, I should step in more to say, Hey, you know
59:58
what things that you're doing, even though you don't know
1:00:01
they're kind of affecting me. I should I should step up and
1:00:04
say those things. But yeah, I guess I'm just ran
1:00:08
down of being a good person and yeah, it's so tiring.
1:00:12
So don't let it drain you. Find ways to recharge and
1:00:17
replenish your energy. Something floating out there.
1:00:21
You see a little white thing. The white look like it's doing
1:00:23
that. I don't know if it's like a
1:00:25
trash bag or what. A dog going out there just.
1:00:29
So we're doing this episode out in nature, sitting out looking
1:00:34
at the river. So if you hear any birds or
1:00:38
people trolley the trolleys came through.
1:00:42
That's that's because we're we're doing this nature thing.
1:00:44
We're taking a full throttle, full throttle this.
1:00:48
Is the piece, this is the piece right here, this is the piece in
1:00:51
the pod. This is how we're experiencing.
1:00:54
We're outdoors. And I enjoyed this more too,
1:00:57
because I obviously I just got a lot to say.
1:01:01
And obviously it sounds like I'm probably harboring a whole bunch
1:01:06
that maybe I shouldn't. I'm a very self aware person, so
1:01:12
I'm saying things that affect me, but I also know the changes
1:01:16
that I need to make. I just this peace and pie.
1:01:19
Yeah, like you said it like this is like my, this is like my
1:01:23
venting session. And it's good to talk it out
1:01:27
like, because you never know, like when you hear yourself,
1:01:30
like sometimes when I'm talking to you honestly, like you'll say
1:01:34
something or I'll hear something like hear myself say something,
1:01:38
I'm like, whoa, realize right. Like it just kind of registered
1:01:42
different when you. Hear already that I had that
1:01:45
tool. Yeah, I had it already.
1:01:48
So sometimes just talking it out helps, yeah.
1:01:50
Just gotta make sure you find the right people.
1:01:52
People that you could trust your information with not that I
1:01:57
don't know half the people who are even listening to this this
1:02:01
podcast, but that is part of the reason why I don't share very
1:02:05
specific details because there there might be some some, some
1:02:10
folks out there who may not want good for me and.
1:02:13
If you know and if you know we on I got this is so funny.
1:02:18
And if you know that we're on this podcast and you listen to
1:02:21
this podcast and being supportive and we're talking
1:02:25
about certain things and certain scenarios and you know, that's
1:02:28
not your scenario. Like if it like it's not you
1:02:31
don't try to put those shoes on. Please don't don't come right?
1:02:34
This is peace in the pod. We this is peaceful around here.
1:02:39
And I think that this is just coming from a place from just
1:02:42
like 2 loving people, loving friends that just, yeah, they,
1:02:49
we just, sometimes we just bear a lot.
1:02:52
And we just speaking through what we're getting through.
1:02:55
And this is advice that we're giving each other on how to
1:02:59
navigate sometimes difficult friendships, different difficult
1:03:03
life situations, and how to be better at these things or how to
1:03:08
put things to rest. Right.
1:03:10
And then some of you may also be going through similar
1:03:13
situations, so this might give you a different perspective on
1:03:16
how to deal with that. So we're just here to talk it
1:03:20
out and help as many people as we can, including ourselves.
1:03:23
Yes, I know that I'm being helped today.
1:03:26
Oh, being outside just. And this breeze feels nice.
1:03:29
And this really put the icing on the cake.
1:03:31
I love outdoors. See, we got to start doing more
1:03:34
outdoor recordings. This is it.
1:03:36
Those bugs just chirping, what are they?
1:03:38
I don't even know. I don't know.
1:03:40
I was thinking that earlier. They're so little, I'm sure, but
1:03:44
they're so loud. Be nice if a butterfly came
1:03:47
through. Yeah.
1:03:49
So yeah. I seen a big yellow one
1:03:51
yesterday. I was sitting on my balcony and
1:03:54
a yellow and black butterfly that was a huge one came flying
1:03:57
by. I haven't seen a yellow
1:03:59
butterfly in a long time. I sat outside the other day and
1:04:02
I seen fireflies. Oh, hadn't.
1:04:06
Seen fireflies in a long. Time.
1:04:08
Yeah, I was talking about those a while back and.
1:04:11
Used to catch them and. Haven't seen.
1:04:14
I thought they were only in the country.
1:04:17
They didn't, they didn't came to the city life you.
1:04:21
Know now it's just some peace in itself.
1:04:25
So there's been these Hawks that have been flying around my
1:04:29
apartment and I don't know, like why they're so close.
1:04:34
When I used to go out onto the river trail and sit and do some
1:04:37
recordings, I would see them out there.
1:04:41
But it's been so hot. I can't go that far out.
1:04:43
Like that's a good little journey from my car.
1:04:45
Is it Hawks or like, oh, they're Hawks?
1:04:47
Ravens. No, they're Hawks.
1:04:50
I'm talking about like when they circle around something like
1:04:53
they'd be flying above and they circle around like it's like
1:04:56
it's prey down there. You might need to.
1:04:58
Call the cops. No, no, he's a Hawks.
1:05:02
Yeah, they they fly like right past the balcony and.
1:05:05
Yeah. Some of them land on the arena
1:05:09
sign and just kind of sit up there and hang out.
1:05:12
Yeah. But lately they've been flying
1:05:15
very close to to, to my apartment, which is nice to
1:05:19
watch because I kind of miss them since I haven't been going
1:05:22
out on the the river trail. But it's it's been hot, a little
1:05:27
too hot to be outside in the direct sun, I'll say.
1:05:31
Oh, we even direct it. Don't matter where where you
1:05:35
are. Well we're we're closer to the
1:05:38
water and there isn't like shade and a nice little breeze, so
1:05:41
this is helpful. Yes, but it has been horrible.
1:05:45
It has been hell. Yeah, the humidity is not
1:05:50
helping, but yeah. So that's that's where we are
1:05:56
hanging out in nature, taking it in, relaxing and clearing our
1:06:01
minds. And I'm just like, did all that
1:06:03
talking and rambling and I just feel the weight lifted.
1:06:08
I do feel the weight lifted. At least it's been talked about
1:06:11
because at first it wouldn't even talk about.
1:06:13
I was just like, oh, I'm having all these thoughts.
1:06:15
I'm having all these these emotions, these feelings, these
1:06:18
what ifs, these all of the things and yeah, I don't know
1:06:23
where to put it. You got to get it out, got to
1:06:26
get it out. I thought it was a ice cream
1:06:28
truck here. I did too.
1:06:30
I thought it was like a. Little cart, what's going on?
1:06:32
We get some. Yeah, I thought it one of the
1:06:35
little cart ones. Yeah.
1:06:39
But yeah. So again, for those of you that
1:06:44
are looking for a nice daily journal, I have created some
1:06:49
affirmation journals. I have two, one is AI am it's
1:06:55
just an overall positive affirmations.
1:06:59
And the second one is an I am abundance affirmations.
1:07:05
And then I I do have a third one.
1:07:06
That one is just a what are you grateful for today journal.
1:07:12
All three are available on Amazon.
1:07:15
I will drop the links in the description And the self help
1:07:19
guide called Thriving through chaos, the guide to finding
1:07:24
strength in life storms is also available on Amazon.
1:07:28
And this self help guide, I think will be beneficial for a
1:07:30
lot of people that are going through situations where they
1:07:34
having a hard time trying to figure out how to maneuver
1:07:37
through it. There's a lot of questions to
1:07:39
help you evaluate the situation. There's some exercises in there
1:07:44
on how to deal with situations. There's some affirmations and a
1:07:48
couple quotes in there. And there's a few pages for
1:07:51
notes to jot down your ideas and thoughts.
1:07:54
But yeah, so if you guys need any journals or self help
1:07:59
guides, please check out my options on Amazon and we would
1:08:06
like to thank you. We're tuning in to Peace in the
1:08:09
Pod and hopefully next time we will be out here in Nature
1:08:13
again. Yes, because I'm at peace in the
1:08:16
pod. And we will catch you guys next.
1:08:21
Time bye. Thanks again for tuning in to.
1:08:28
Heartful Thursday. I'm Loretta.
1:08:31
And I'm right here. And we will catch you guys.
1:08:34
Next time, bye.