Latest / Cage Match: A Roundabout Way of Meeting Nicolas Cage / Vampire's Kiss vs Mandy
Transcript
- 0:00What you are listening to is real. The participants are not actors. They are real people with a case pending in Podcast Court.
- 0:10Hello, I'm Producer Peter and welcome back to Cage Match, a roundabout way of meeting Nicolas Cage, Podcast Court.
- 0:16Today's case is between a man with a penchant for heavy metal and really bad Eric Estrada jokes, and a man who knows his alphabet a little too well.
- 0:26Oh god.
- 0:30Oh my god.
- 0:37Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.
- 0:43Fuuuuuuuuck.
- 0:48Perfect. Sean, I think your audio sounded great last episode too. I don't know if you listened to it, but...
- 0:53I have touched nothing.
- 0:56Great. That's exactly what we want then.
- 0:59That's how I prefer you live your life. Touching nothing.
- 1:04Touching nothing and no one.
- 1:06No hearts, no spirits, no bodies.
- 1:09Especially no spirits.
- 1:11That's fucking why I skipped town.
- 1:16Well, welcome back Lauren.
- 1:18Thank you.
- 1:20Yeah, thanks for being our last minute filth.
- 1:23Yay, woo!
- 1:24Oh great, I'm so glad I'm a ringer.
- 1:27Yeah, well it's kind of funny too because we've never had the same person in the same part of a bracket come back.
- 1:33So you are a special case here.
- 1:36So you are twice in the slicks team.
- 1:40Double, double slick.
- 1:42Yes, slide right off your chest.
- 1:47Gross.
- 1:50You made that phrase up. This is it. Your words, your words.
- 1:54It's true, we did. I mean you can thank Nick for any naming conventions.
- 1:59Not Nick's team though. I think I said this last time too.
- 2:02Yeah.
- 2:03Well, I mean, the way we're collecting Knicks, we'll eventually be able to do this again, but with Knicks.
- 2:09It's true. I would have liked to have pulled in at least one more Nick this run.
- 2:15Oh, I see. I think we could probably do a Knicks team.
- 2:18Yeah, part of the stipulation of being a guest on your podcast should be that you legally change your name to Nick.
- 2:24That would be good.
- 2:25Yeah, that's reasonable. I mean I was supposed to name either of my children Nicholas Michael Gearhart.
- 2:31Tennessee.
- 2:32Yeah, exactly.
- 2:34Noonan Nesvig.
- 2:35Yeah, right.
- 2:36Nunesvig.
- 2:37Nunesvig, right.
- 2:38Ooh, hi Noon.
- 2:39Yeah, there you go.
- 2:41Nesnan.
- 2:42One of these days somebody is going to name their child Nicholas Michael Gearhart.
- 2:46Tennessee.
- 2:47Thank you for remembering Poonin Q Noonan.
- 2:50Poonin, forgot about Poonin Q Noonan.
- 2:55Thank you for putting your respect on Poonin Q Noonan's name.
- 3:01To this day, the funniest, the hardest I've laughed out in public.
- 3:06Wasn't that like just a random letter? Just like a weird mail?
- 3:09Yes.
- 3:10Speaking of weird mail, fucking government came after me for fucking thousands of dollars this week.
- 3:15Oh, lame.
- 3:16Probably we should kill a CEO about it.
- 3:20It worked for health care.
- 3:22Yay!
- 3:23When I first called they're like, your wait will be 35 minutes. Would you like us to call you back?
- 3:27I'm like, yes. And then I called them back and they're like, cool, we're going to transfer you the billing.
- 3:32Then the machines like your weight is going to be 65 minutes.
- 3:36Please hold.
- 3:38Oh, did they have like that one 10 second loop of like bad jazz too?
- 3:46Sounds like it was recorded in a dishwasher.
- 3:48Yep.
- 3:50Oh, no. The absolute worst one is anyone here at USAA.
- 3:54Have you ever seen the USAA commercial with their little jingle?
- 3:57It's just that on loop.
- 3:59A USAAAA.
- 4:03That's like how low V and like now I will treat like now I will train every listener to absolutely hate this sound and like want to punch something every time they hear it.
- 4:15Speaking of annoying noises that waste your time. Welcome back to Cage Match.
- 4:19Yay!
- 4:20I'm Sean, my co-host.
- 4:25Nick.
- 4:27And our producer.
- 4:28I'm Nick.
- 4:29Peter, hello.
- 4:31And our last minute save returning guest.
- 4:37Lauren Freeman.
- 4:40Welcome back.
- 4:41So Lauren, you had the delightful realization that the Vampire's Kiss movie is the one that all the memes are from.
- 4:49Oh my God.
- 4:50Had you never seen it before?
- 4:51I hadn't. No, most. Okay. Literally most of these movies like I hadn't seen before.
- 4:56So you have given me the gift of having having to watch them.
- 5:02I didn't end up watching Mandy, by the way.
- 5:03I wanted to. And then I saw a review that was like this movie is not for the faint of heart.
- 5:07And I was like, well, that's me then.
- 5:11It was like dark out and I was like, it sounds like a scaly movie.
- 5:14But I did watch a shit ton of like YouTube trailers and clips and like him talking about it.
- 5:19There's like analysis videos everywhere.
- 5:21So I feel like I did my homework.
- 5:23Yeah, that sounds like you did a good job.
- 5:25It is kind of like a creepy movie.
- 5:27It's a little unsettling.
- 5:28I am I am terrible with scary movies.
- 5:30I do this thing like if a scary movie is interesting to me and I want to see it, I will just do the like just see as many clips that are allowed on the Internet or like analysis videos that are allowed on the Internet or just like reading plot summaries.
- 5:42So I feel like I got the experience.
- 5:44This is also how I consumed like mid-Somar and like hereditary.
- 5:48Like I'm like, oh, that sounds scary.
- 5:50I'll just watch some little clips on my phone so it's not like immersive.
- 5:55If I watch it small, it can't hurt me.
- 5:57The scariest part about Mandy is the Cheddar Goblin commercial.
- 6:01Cheddar what?
- 6:02I love Cheddar.
- 6:03Oh, you don't know Cheddar.
- 6:05If you haven't seen them, you would.
- 6:07Fuck.
- 6:08I'll watch it while it's daylight.
- 6:10It's a Goblin.
- 6:11Yeah.
- 6:12Cheddar Goblin is they made a commercial for like a mac and cheese is sponsored by a Goblin.
- 6:20Yeah, it's Cheddar Goblin brand and it barfs mac and cheese on children.
- 6:24Yeah.
- 6:25Oh, Jesus.
- 6:26I just love the idea that they were on set and they were doing this like, you know, very arty kind of scary movie.
- 6:32And then they're like, what if we have a dumb Cheddar Goblin commercial in the middle of it?
- 6:36Why the fuck not?
- 6:37Do you guys know a puppeteer?
- 6:38I know a puppeteer.
- 6:41I just love Nicolas Cage staring at it and then being like Cheddar Goblin.
- 6:47That was a really good Nicolas Cage.
- 6:49I assume you've all worked up a really good impression by now.
- 6:53You know, what's kind of amazing and very disappointing is when we do the tabletop RPG, I'm going to have to do Nick Cage voices and I'm just they're all going to be this.
- 7:01So.
- 7:03Or just like every like speaking of speaking of all the means you just have to like recite everything in the like alphabet recitation voice.
- 7:12Exactly.
- 7:13Give me a perception jack.
- 7:17I like that.
- 7:19I think I can handle that.
- 7:20Peter Lowe, I think I could probably channel weird affectation.
- 7:24That's like unhinged to you.
- 7:26I was a little drunk and I was horny.
- 7:29Oh my God.
- 7:30It's like halfway to Zoolander.
- 7:31It's like just like a little it's like what Zoolander became.
- 7:36But it's like never go to Zoolander.
- 7:39It's fucking accent.
- 7:42So this was sight unseen for you.
- 7:44What was your takeaway?
- 7:45Like, I mean, it's a it's a real wild movie.
- 7:49It's a wild fucking ride.
- 7:51Oh my God.
- 7:53I didn't realize like I thought that my interpretation of it was like, oh, well, that's I mean, maybe this is how everybody works.
- 7:59But it's like, oh, well, I'm obviously right.
- 8:01And I know what it's about.
- 8:02And then I like watch this like commentary.
- 8:04There's like, you know, the commentary track with the director and Nicholas Cage on Vampire's Kiss is like a commentary track on like the DVD or whatever.
- 8:11There's several, several times of them being like, well, we don't really know what it's about.
- 8:15Do you know what it's about?
- 8:16I don't know what it's about.
- 8:17And we made it like fucking like I thought that I was like I had this like elevated like, oh, it's obviously about addiction.
- 8:25It's not cocaine.
- 8:26It's not some way that like misery is about like, oh, she's your biggest fan.
- 8:29And like and then I'm like looking online to see, like, confirmation that like this is what they intended when they made this movie and like nobody else, nobody else.
- 8:40Well, what's interesting is everybody's had a different take.
- 8:43You know, our first guest, Gary and Rocks, they were like full on, he is an actual vampire, you know, Sean's take is a little more like he has rabies because he probably got bit by a real bat.
- 8:54I think he was just a little drunk and a little horny.
- 8:58Yeah.
- 9:00Who amongst us hasn't been?
- 9:02I think business just kind of broke him.
- 9:04It's that middle management, like throw yourself out a window moment.
- 9:08Well, it's like, and it's also about like just being lonely and isolated.
- 9:12And he wants clearly wants a part of some relationship.
- 9:15Yeah. Yeah.
- 9:16He wants some relationship.
- 9:18I like at this point watching it, I was my kind of takeaway this time was just like,
- 9:23is this therapist even real?
- 9:25Like is any of any of those scenes real or is that just hallucinations?
- 9:30Yeah. Yeah.
- 9:30Because we have clear proof that it's a hallucination later.
- 9:34So like, right.
- 9:35Yeah. It makes you sort of reflect back and go like, was any of this fucking.
- 9:39But then he hallucinated her with that like beefcake.
- 9:43Because at least she has a scene where she exists outside of him.
- 9:45But he could be imagining it because he's still calling her.
- 9:48And like the one woman in his life who gives him like all the attention,
- 9:53like does he imagine her with another man or is that real?
- 9:56Because that just seems like such an odd like detail to throw in.
- 10:00Right. And that would be his worst case scenario.
- 10:03Yeah.
- 10:03Like if he's in crisis, her being with another like much hotter,
- 10:06much younger man with a towel around his neck would still be his like worst.
- 10:11You know, like, no, you're supposed to prioritize me only.
- 10:14Sure. No, ask. It's a look that I'm not sure I could pull off.
- 10:18I'm sorry. No, sure.
- 10:19As God.
- 10:20I think you're currently pulling off the look of Sean's just out here living like shirtless.
- 10:27As got life.
- 10:28Oh, yeah. There you go.
- 10:30Wish there's a guy in my office who pulls up and has got and it upsets me.
- 10:33No. Yeah. Fucking great.
- 10:35And I, you know, I'm just like, I just since just moving to Portland, I'm in the office more.
- 10:40I've gotten like hard on like wildfang apparel because I'm like, I need I need to have something
- 10:47and I got to compete with Ascot guy and I want to be the fanciest fanciest lad here.
- 10:51The fanciest boy.
- 10:53I just I'm not I'm not confident enough for an Ascot.
- 10:56I don't have that Freddy from Scooby Doo confidence.
- 10:58We all have an Ascot within us, Sean. You can get there.
- 11:01Yeah, that's beautiful.
- 11:03Within every person, there is an Ascot waiting to come out.
- 11:07I think there are two Ascot's.
- 11:16I do like the idea of just getting more and more confident and Ascot just sort of like blooms.
- 11:21Like it starts out as like a like a thread, just like a little string.
- 11:24No one can see it. And then, yeah, it just slowly like blossoms.
- 11:28I think you should misunderstand the assignment and go dressed as a mascot.
- 11:33Oh, or what if you just get like a mascot costume of your coworker with a bigger Ascot?
- 11:41So you could be an Ascot mascot.
- 11:44Oh, this this I want to do.
- 11:46Unhinged.
- 11:48But with a big felt head.
- 11:50All right, Lauren. So give us the quick summary of this movie.
- 11:53OK, so let's see. So Peter Lowe played by Nicolas Cage is a arguably high powered
- 12:01executive literary agent in Manhattan, who's somehow raking in an insane amount of money
- 12:09as a literary agent.
- 12:11But since he's in a suit and lives in New York, that means he's a high powered corporate executive fellow
- 12:19with an assistant who he cannot help but abuse at every opportunity.
- 12:25He's a womanizer.
- 12:27He's a womanizer. He on one of his dates, a bat flies in through his window and he gets super
- 12:34horny up about it, tells his therapist who's like, that's nothing. Don't worry about it.
- 12:41Goes on, goes on, goes at the bar to pick up a different woman
- 12:49and meets question mark. Maybe she's real.
- 12:52A lady named Rachel, who he takes back to his place and she immediately bites his neck,
- 12:58which he's also super horny up about.
- 13:00And then that's maybe the first 10 minutes of plot.
- 13:04And then everything else is just absolute unhinged unraveling of Nicolas Cage, the
- 13:13inventing the caricature of Nicolas Cage so early in his career, fresh out the gate,
- 13:18fresh off a moonstruck, he just went bonkers. Just the dissent like the rest of the movie is
- 13:25just absolute dissent into madness.
- 13:28It is a terrific little spiral that he sends himself down on. And I think with my watches,
- 13:36I assume that the time he meets Rachel, that's like his first like open, like breaking moment,
- 13:45like mental break. I really like when he's just talking to her and it's so I think he's middle
- 13:51middle management, not super high powered because of the quality of his kitchen.
- 13:56His kitchen is like really bad.
- 13:58There is notably a roach in his kitchen.
- 14:01Yeah, a water beetle.
- 14:03Right. But what were you going to say?
- 14:05Oh, and he's just like holding that coffee over the bed. It's like, oh, man, your bed's going to
- 14:10have like such a gross stain when you spill all that coffee on it.
- 14:13You're going to have to like try to have sex on top of that coffee stain.
- 14:19I'm pretty sure he doesn't have sex again in that movie.
- 14:24Well, he gets bitten again and they reuse the same footage from the previous bite.
- 14:30Well, part of that is because he was really not hornt up for Jennifer Beals, like not into her at
- 14:38all. Just super soft.
- 14:39Not that we needed to see anything beyond faces in the shot.
- 14:46It is important, though, like it breaks the immersion if I know he doesn't have at least.
- 14:51Yeah, just so it's semi.
- 14:52Yeah.
- 14:53I mean, that kind of works, though, for the fact that she's not real, like it's just reusing the
- 15:00same footage. So like I always assume like he met this woman and then started fantasizing about her.
- 15:06And then when he meets her again at the end of the movie and she has no idea who he is.
- 15:09Yeah, yeah.
- 15:10Because none of it was real.
- 15:13And at the point where he meets her again, he's.
- 15:16That's crazy.
- 15:17He also killed a woman.
- 15:20Also killed a woman.
- 15:21And I those two things.
- 15:23Yeah.
- 15:24But I absolutely love the little detail of him putting the fake plastic teeth back in his mouth
- 15:31after he bites the woman.
- 15:32After barfing.
- 15:33Yeah.
- 15:34Yeah.
- 15:35Also, like in the in that scene, like I feel like I've heard people debate about like,
- 15:41well, those like those stupid teeth, like he couldn't have possibly done any damage.
- 15:44Like, obviously, he took them out and like you can do damage even with human teeth,
- 15:48biting somebody in the jungle.
- 15:49But like it's clear, like the makeup effects is like for like human teeth marks.
- 15:54Like they made sure to do like for, you know, like dull teeth marks.
- 16:00Right.
- 16:00Yeah, like.
- 16:00And there I mean, it's there is the very like slow like he turns around face covered in blood.
- 16:06And you just seem like pop the teeth back in.
- 16:08Yeah.
- 16:09Yeah.
- 16:09They were paying attention.
- 16:11Right.
- 16:12I love I love that.
- 16:13I mean, I truly can't imagine why how you could come away from the movie thinking that he did,
- 16:20in fact, turn into a vampire because I feel like the movie is so clear, like so fucking clear.
- 16:25Like this man is just insane.
- 16:27He's just insane.
- 16:28Insane, he's just insane, like the like reflection moment where he's like, where am I?
- 16:34Oh, Christ, where am I?
- 16:35Like, like with like seven different reflections visible in the shot, like six different like
- 16:42reflections of reflections is like, no, you're right there, buddy.
- 16:45Hey, bud.
- 16:45Hey, bud.
- 16:46We can you're there.
- 16:48I think this movie really suffers from its reputation and people just saying how like how bad it is.
- 16:55Because if you have to watch it critically, which I've had to now four times, it's got it's got it's
- 17:03got a through line start to finish.
- 17:06It's not a long movie.
- 17:07So it's a pretty it's a pretty tight film.
- 17:10So yeah, I think that people are just like, oh, he's a vampire.
- 17:13Oh, this movie is terrible or like unhinged.
- 17:15It's like you're only watching the means you're only watching like that the performance side of it.
- 17:20You're not actually paying attention to the whole movie holistically, which yeah, I don't think
- 17:24it's a hard film to follow.
- 17:26And I don't think it's difficult to like understand what's going on.
- 17:30No, and I think I think that's a benefit of it.
- 17:32So I watching it like it was like, oh, this is this is basically like parallel to American Psycho.
- 17:40Like this is just like high powered executive in Manhattan is bad to people and goes down
- 17:46just descends into madness and violence.
- 17:49And, you know, because because who he is, like somehow he just goes off the deep end.
- 17:53But I think so, A, this came out before American Psycho.
- 17:56So this potentially inspired it.
- 17:59But B, I love the fact I feel like in a world where people can take Fight Club seriously
- 18:05or take Joker seriously and go like, yeah, that's my guy.
- 18:09Like, I'm supposed to root for this narrator.
- 18:12I'm supposed to identify with this man.
- 18:14Like in a world where people can do that, I appreciate I appreciate the fact that in
- 18:19this movie they're like, he's an insufferable man, baby.
- 18:23You are not allowed to like him.
- 18:24He is objectively unlikable.
- 18:27Like, do not root for this man.
- 18:29He's awful.
- 18:31I think they want you to relate more to the character and maybe think about what that
- 18:35means for you as a person.
- 18:36But most people can't think critically.
- 18:38Whereas with Peter Lowe, you just have that great scene of I'm a vampire.
- 18:43I'm a vampire.
- 18:44I'm a vampire.
- 18:44I'm a running.
- 18:46Also, I heard that like that.
- 18:48So those all those shots like in public.
- 18:51This is incredible.
- 18:52Fucking insane is like those are long shots.
- 18:55Those are like the camera was way far away and those are real bystanders.
- 19:00And I feel like having so having moved to New York a couple a couple years ago,
- 19:04that shit is so true.
- 19:08Like, yeah, someone could be trucking down the street screaming, I'm a vampire.
- 19:12And you just go like, not my problem.
- 19:15I didn't see it.
- 19:16Yeah, it's Tuesday morning.
- 19:18I'm going to work right now.
- 19:19Right. Like I didn't see I'm not a snitch.
- 19:22I didn't see nothing.
- 19:23Like, yeah, fine.
- 19:24You're a vampire.
- 19:26Holy shit, though, he is really like terrifying.
- 19:29I'm just imagining being Alva in those situations.
- 19:32Like my favorite scene, I think, is him.
- 19:35He starts his head is down on his desk.
- 19:37Alva.
- 19:39Oh, my God.
- 19:39Alva.
- 19:40Oh, my God.
- 19:42Alva.
- 19:44And then he runs up, leaps onto the desk.
- 19:46Holy shit.
- 19:47There you are.
- 19:47It's like, holy fuck.
- 19:50Fucking terrifying.
- 19:52I mean, yeah, I do feel like like there's like so many failures of bystanders in her orbit.
- 19:59Like even even as she's getting like chased into the bathroom and there's an old lady
- 20:03who's like, what the hell is going on?
- 20:05Like, sorry.
- 20:06What is he doing in here?
- 20:07Do something.
- 20:08What?
- 20:10And like Peter Lowe throws that other secretary's shit on her floor and she's like, he's so eccentric.
- 20:15It's like, oh, God.
- 20:18But even in that bathroom scene with the old lady, Alva says, I have a gun.
- 20:23I will use it.
- 20:24And she's just like, what the hell?
- 20:26It's just like no concern whatsoever for a man being in the bathroom and a terrified
- 20:31woman saying she has a gun.
- 20:33Well, it's a man's world.
- 20:36Yeah.
- 20:36I mean, I think Nick has the point of it.
- 20:38Yeah, I think that's what they were trying to say, like, because immediately after that
- 20:40bathroom scene, it's like the boardroom where they're like, she asked me for a raise.
- 20:45You know, which I think is like, thank you for being so unsubtle.
- 20:52Like, thank you, movie, for beating us over the head with the fact that we are not on
- 20:56these people's side.
- 21:00Like, lest they, you know, lest the audience take away the idea that this man is somehow
- 21:06someone to aspire to.
- 21:09He knows his alphabet, though.
- 21:11Oh, he sure does know his alphabet.
- 21:13Very good, Peter, you know, your alphabet.
- 21:15So, OK, now that you've seen the movie, is there like a context for a meme that you like
- 21:22the most or?
- 21:25Gosh, I mean, you know, the big eyes, the.
- 21:32Tilty face.
- 21:32Yeah, big eyes, tilty face.
- 21:34I mean, obviously, like, that's the classic.
- 21:36That's the one.
- 21:37But I actually did feel sort of a thrill going like, oh, this is the context for the yelling
- 21:43the alphabet, because like every time I'd seen that clip, it was like, what could possibly
- 21:50trigger someone yelling the alphabet at a sitting down woman?
- 21:53Like, what could possibly make this circumstance occur?
- 22:00So it's a filing issue.
- 22:03All right.
- 22:03I mean, it's not making a goddamn sense, but like, all right, I mean, I mean, I mean,
- 22:07all right, here's the context.
- 22:08Now I understand.
- 22:09Yeah.
- 22:10What a bonkers, what a bonkers movie.
- 22:12OK, no, I do want to talk about I want to talk about what y'all think is happening
- 22:17because I feel so certain that it's about cocaine.
- 22:20Cocaine makes you an insufferable man, baby.
- 22:23Like every problem he has is of his own making.
- 22:28I'm like, like every problem he has is of his own making.
- 22:31Like even the way he dies, he's like, do it, do it, please, please, please kill me.
- 22:38Yeah, I mean.
- 22:41Mescaline.
- 22:44I'm still convinced he has rabies because like I love that.
- 22:47I love that.
- 22:49Like there's the bat and then like.
- 22:51Descent into madness and bite somebody physically bite somebody.
- 22:57It's all like that's all there.
- 22:59But it's just like I think he's just lonely and clearly nobody cares about him,
- 23:03probably because he's an insufferable prick, but he's clearly having some type of mental break
- 23:07and just nobody seems to care.
- 23:09And I think he just wants any type of connection whatsoever.
- 23:15But then, like even when he gets even in the midst of his psychotic break,
- 23:18even as he is fucking talking to the corner of a building and thinking it's his drink,
- 23:24as as he gets set up with this imaginary perfect woman,
- 23:27instantly he starts being an absolute prick to her, too.
- 23:30Yeah, it's like he can't even not abuse his imaginary girlfriend like seconds later.
- 23:38Like he's not the victim here.
- 23:40No, he's not.
- 23:44I think my first read of it from the first time we watched it was just like
- 23:48that guy you see on the street corner just talking to no one like this is that story.
- 23:52Like this is how that guy got there.
- 23:54Yeah, like had.
- 23:56Right, right.
- 23:58Like he started somewhere and he had an arc downward.
- 24:03Well, I was I always think about like at the end when he's like dragging like the large chunk of.
- 24:10I'm just like, how come no one's concerned about that?
- 24:12And then last night I'm I'm in just hanging out in Portland,
- 24:16just standing on the street waiting to meet someone.
- 24:18Guy's just taking his axe for a walk and I'm like, that's not my problem.
- 24:22Because if you make it your problem, then it is a problem.
- 24:28Probably competitive axe throwing.
- 24:30That seems like something Portland would be into.
- 24:34This was an American psycho type like that axe is being put to some use.
- 24:40I mean, you could you could throw that axe to you, but.
- 24:43You can throw any axe if you put your mind to it.
- 24:47Or was it axe body spray?
- 24:48Axe body spray, because that's also concerning to see an adult man walking down the street carrying his axe body spray.
- 24:58What what are your favorite scenes from this movie?
- 25:01Oh, my God.
- 25:02I mean, I think the ones that specifically just dunk on the character as soon as he makes an assertion about who he is.
- 25:09Like, I feel like the movie is not on this man's side, and that is deeply satisfying to me
- 25:14because I think that they're specifically trying to make a movie about,
- 25:17you know, I keep saying this phrase insufferable man, baby, but like, you know, like, like they've set up this awful person that I don't want to root for.
- 25:26And then the movie just had a dunks on him, and I appreciate that.
- 25:30So like the scene where like all of the things that he thinks or all of the moments he thinks he's turning into a vampire.
- 25:37And then the movie immediately goes, no, you're not.
- 25:40Like, I think those might be my like just like the sunlight, you know, reaching his hand into the sun.
- 25:46Light and like making it like sound as if it burns him and then immediately like disproving that or like, you know, when he's like in the mirror, like touching his teeth and like checking to see if they've lengthened and then like, no, they have not.
- 26:01And then he goes to buy some fucking teeth.
- 26:04Another another Nick Cage movie where he doesn't have enough dollars.
- 26:09He's often very broke.
- 26:11Yeah.
- 26:12What about you, Sean?
- 26:13Favorite scene?
- 26:14Oh, I'm still so impressed by him doing the standing leap onto the desk and loafers like I'm just so from no running, no running start just from standing two feet on the ground to suddenly two feet on the desk like that's Olympian right there.
- 26:33Yeah, his box jump skills were pretty good.
- 26:35Across all of the like unpredictable vampire like scenes, I probably still like the scene where they're in the the cab and he's telling Alva like she's the one who's going to do the job.
- 26:52She's the one who's going to do the job and like he has those like little power trips, which I I just love him sitting there like even if you were even if there was one other person who worked here for one day longer, I'd still make you do it.
- 27:10He's such a fucking asshole.
- 27:12He's such a shit.
- 27:13And I love when he just kind of leans into that shitness.
- 27:16And you're right, Lauren. I think that the big key to this is that like he isn't likeable and they don't make it like, oh, you're kind of rooting for him. It's just like you root for him failing.
- 27:26You are like, yeah, this guy sucks. It's kind of fun watching him just absolutely eat shit and the tortures of the dead.
- 27:33Yeah, oh my God, that fucking line.
- 27:36There's one thing in this movie I noticed this time that I never grok down before and it bothered me and I want other people's opinion on it when he takes when he goes to the museum with the girl he was out with.
- 27:50Yeah, Jackie.
- 27:52Jackie, she's wearing a wide brim hat.
- 27:56Oh, yeah.
- 27:57Like her hair sticking out the top wide brim hat.
- 27:59It's a style.
- 28:00It's a visor.
- 28:02Yeah, it's just it's a really fancy visor.
- 28:04And I'm like, this is weird. I don't know that I dislike it, but I don't understand it.
- 28:10Okay.
- 28:10It's the late 80s.
- 28:11Fuck the ascot.
- 28:12Crazy.
- 28:13Do that now.
- 28:13Yeah, you're now going to be the hat person.
- 28:15Yeah, and like the poof out the top.
- 28:17Put your hair out through the top.
- 28:19Yes.
- 28:20I like this a lot.
- 28:20This is your vibe now, Sean.
- 28:23I've worn weirder.
- 28:26So good. Embrace it.
- 28:29Yeah.
- 28:29No shirt, though.
- 28:30Get the hat.
- 28:31Never a shirt.
- 28:32Yeah.
- 28:32No.
- 28:33Just shirts are for cowards.
- 28:35Yeah. Let it be free.
- 28:37Oh, you know, I really like the part where he runs up to that guy at the church and he's like,
- 28:42pull out your rosary.
- 28:43Show me the cross.
- 28:44Burn me with it.
- 28:45And the guy's like, I don't speak English and like turns away.
- 28:50It's every time I watch the movie, something happens and I'm like, oh, I wasn't expecting
- 28:54that even though I've seen it so many times and I know what's going to come.
- 28:57It's like, ah,
- 28:59I know the scene that always cracks me up and I always forget about it until I see it again
- 29:02is when he gets he gets the fake plastic teeth, he puts them in his mouth and he just.
- 29:07Hands and knees crawls off the cat out of the.
- 29:10That's so good.
- 29:12Toward some pigeons.
- 29:14So the commentary also reveals how much of that movie is just Nicholas Cage doing an insane
- 29:20thing on a take and the director going, yeah, all right.
- 29:23Wait, click.
- 29:24So much of the commentary is just them is just them admitting to the fact that they were like,
- 29:28and what exactly is this?
- 29:31And the other one being like, I don't know.
- 29:35Like, yes, I think the reason that it's so iconic is that they just gave him a free reign to like
- 29:40fucking do whatever and it stayed in the movie.
- 29:43Like they're just like, yeah, all right, like your reflection burns you too, I guess,
- 29:47or like putting in teeth means you crawl like what?
- 29:49All right.
- 29:50Yeah, all right.
- 29:51Go for it.
- 29:54It's such a wild movie.
- 29:55I just I don't think it could work in any other city than New York City.
- 29:59Like it you see crazy people in other cities, but there's something about New York City.
- 30:05And I agree with that, too.
- 30:06It could not be a different actor.
- 30:08I don't think there's any other movie that could do this either.
- 30:14Like this amount of just like absurdity that's unscripted and unlike practiced,
- 30:21just like open the floodgates and let something happen.
- 30:24I don't think any other movie could capture the same kind of just appeal and allure
- 30:32in doing this and like still work as a cohesive thing.
- 30:36Yeah.
- 30:36Lauren, if you could just give like your thesis why this movie deserves to go on,
- 30:42you know, what's your argument?
- 30:43What's your push?
- 30:45From what I've seen of Mandy, like, you know, pitting the two against each other,
- 30:49like obviously the auteurship.
- 30:51Without seeing Cheddar Goblin.
- 30:52Without having seen Cherry Goblin.
- 30:55So like.
- 30:55So you're a pain in me.
- 30:56Take it with take it with a grain of cheddar.
- 30:59Yeah.
- 31:00I think the auteurship of the director and the writer of Mandy,
- 31:04it's clear that there's an artistic vision and I fucks with that.
- 31:08Like that's great for me.
- 31:10I love that.
- 31:11However, if the criteria for moving forward in the in the bracket is quintessential Nicholas
- 31:19Cajerry, like this is it, this is the one like this is the one that's going to go to the end.
- 31:26Like this is this is the most Nicholas Cage he's ever been and shall ever be and was allowed to be.
- 31:33I think other movies got in his way of being the batshit insane
- 31:37over the top fucking clown that he is and must be.
- 31:42It's really just this and G-Force.
- 31:44Get fucked, Sean.
- 31:50Don't make me think about boom boom pow ever again.
- 31:54Yeah, the Avarice case is quintessential.
- 31:56Like it is it is it is the the alpha and the omega.
- 32:00It is the birth of the Nicholas Cage identity that we all think of when we think of Nicholas Cage.
- 32:07Like that's the one like no question, no question at all.
- 32:12Everything like the other the qualities of other films that are like good films,
- 32:17they're good for for other people's influence.
- 32:20But this one is good because of Nicholas Cage.
- 32:23That's awesome.
- 32:24I was just sitting here thinking like, oh man, if it hadn't been for Vampire's Kiss,
- 32:28if Vampire's Kiss never happened, we never would have had Face Off or.
- 32:32Yeah, it's true.
- 32:33I mean, that's a really good point.
- 32:35So Lauren, at this point, do you want to pitch anything?
- 32:38Thank you for being on, by the way.
- 32:40I don't I don't have anything to pitch yet, I unfortunately.
- 32:44But I've got an Instagram account that you're welcome to follow me at.
- 32:47It's freeman.band, f-r-e-1-e.
- 32:49Like the Fremen.
- 32:50Like the Fremen.
- 32:51Yeah, I had recently read Dune when I changed my last name and.
- 32:56That you can do that.
- 32:57They let you do that.
- 32:57You can just change it.
- 32:58You can just pick one.
- 32:59Two court dates in the state of Washington.
- 33:01You can just be.
- 33:02You can your first name can be Nicholas Michael Gearhart.
- 33:05Oh, yeah, Nicholas Michael Gearhart.
- 33:07Michael Gearhart.
- 33:08Michael.
- 33:09Michael or like McCauley Culkin Culkin McCauley.
- 33:13Yeah, exactly.
- 33:15What is it? McCauley McCauley Culkin Culkin.
- 33:17Yes.
- 33:18Yeah, that's so good.
- 33:20That is a really good middle name.
- 33:21McCauley McCauley Culkin Culkin.
- 33:25Almost as good as Dunan Q.
- 33:27Noonan.
- 33:29You all can be Q.
- 33:32Awesome.
- 33:32Thank you very much.
- 33:34Yeah, thank you, Lauren.
- 33:34Sorry for the weird time confusion.
- 33:36This is so fun.
- 33:39Chris, you still working for the college?
- 33:44Yeah.
- 33:47They brought me back after the pandemic and instead of doing maintenance stuff,
- 33:50they decided to put me as the undergraduate services coordinator for the psychology department.
- 33:58What?
- 34:01It's the weirdest shit.
- 34:02Like, so I don't know how much time we got, but I can tell you the story of how it happened.
- 34:07That's mostly our podcast.
- 34:09So yeah.
- 34:12Like straight up year one of the pandemic, they go through like, all right, we got to sit down
- 34:20to college, everyone who's not essential or whatever, we're laying you off.
- 34:24And the entire time I'm like telling him, hey, so I get it.
- 34:28But there are I've been there for at that point, I've been there for about maybe 13 years
- 34:33and had held several positions.
- 34:35So they have a rule at SFSU where if you get before you get laid off, they put you in a position
- 34:42that you were in previously, you know.
- 34:45So basically, they call it retreat rights.
- 34:49They ignored this rule that they wrote in their own book and just cut my head off.
- 34:53Right.
- 34:54So I'm sitting on my ass for like most of the year.
- 34:57SFSU calls me, the union calls me and says, hey, so we made oopsie poopsie.
- 35:03We weren't supposed to lay you off.
- 35:04And you have two options.
- 35:06Take us to arbitration and you're most likely going to win because we shouldn't laid you
- 35:10off or you can have your job back.
- 35:13And I'm thinking like, well, I don't really like driving these computer cars and I want
- 35:19some benefits.
- 35:20So I'm like, yeah, sure.
- 35:21I'll take the job back.
- 35:21Right.
- 35:22The union person is like, for real?
- 35:24You want the job back?
- 35:24You like, I just told you that you can sue us and you're going to win.
- 35:30Win.
- 35:32No, I think I'll take the job back.
- 35:33Right.
- 35:34And they're like, OK, I'm thinking like, I'm going to get my old position back where
- 35:38I'm just like the guy with the hammer.
- 35:40Right.
- 35:41And they say, well, that position doesn't exist anymore.
- 35:44We've literally dissolved it.
- 35:46We've outsourced hammers.
- 35:48Basically.
- 35:49Yeah.
- 35:49They outsourced the hammers on me.
- 35:51And the position that the position was created for me because there was no training in this
- 36:00department.
- 36:00It was like nobody to train me on anything, basically.
- 36:02I had to learn everything all on my own.
- 36:04I mean, it's pretty chill.
- 36:05I'm almost certain that the game plan was stick me somewhere where nobody will bother
- 36:10me because the time limit on me taking in arbitration is like like a 10 year window.
- 36:17Oh, shit.
- 36:18OK.
- 36:18Yeah.
- 36:20Just leave them alone.
- 36:21Let them do what everyone.
- 36:22Love that.
- 36:23Yeah.
- 36:23So it's pretty cool.
- 36:25Yes.
- 36:25It's cool to get tenure over like a threat.
- 36:28Basically.
- 36:29Right.
- 36:30Just the implication.
- 36:31I'm literally Ralph Wiggum here like I'm in danger.
- 36:38Welcome back to Cage Match, colon, a roundabout way of meeting Nicolas Cage.
- 36:41I'm Sean here with my co-host Nick and a producer Peter.
- 36:46Hello.
- 36:47And special guest and one of my oldest friends.
- 36:50I think we figured 21 years.
- 36:53Chris Fields.
- 36:54Hey, man.
- 36:55Yeah, I'm going to say 15 because I don't want anybody to know exactly how old I am yet.
- 36:59You know, still kind of struggling with the mortality.
- 37:02You don't want to know that we're we are very much middle aged.
- 37:06Well, the stories we have to tell suddenly have a different color to them
- 37:10when they realize the actual age we are.
- 37:12Right.
- 37:12Wow.
- 37:13That was like literally three years ago and you're still that stupid.
- 37:17Yeah.
- 37:17Yeah, I haven't gotten any smarter.
- 37:19Nah.
- 37:20Luckily, I have some sipping cream in the mini fridge.
- 37:23So if I bust that out, don't mind me once in a while.
- 37:26But yeah.
- 37:28Sipping cream is only half and half.
- 37:31Just got that joke.
- 37:32A half and half.
- 37:34Yeah, that joke at half and half, man.
- 37:35I don't know if you guys are sponsored by anybody,
- 37:37so I don't want to say exactly what kind of sipping cream it is.
- 37:40But it's definitely a me kind of drink, Sean.
- 37:44Tell me about your cream adventures.
- 37:46All right.
- 37:46I'm going to show it to you guys because you have the camera,
- 37:48but because it needs to be like part of the whole setup.
- 37:51It is a jar of egg or waffle sipping cream.
- 37:57I saw this when it came out.
- 37:58I have not tried.
- 37:59Well, it tastes like an egg or waffle.
- 38:01It tastes like an egg or waffle.
- 38:04Judging by last night's sipping test, it definitely passes the mark.
- 38:09Absolutely recommend it.
- 38:11This is not a sponsor gig.
- 38:12This is just me as a alcoholic connoisseur telling you that this is probably
- 38:17one of the best sipping creams I've ever had in my life.
- 38:19And I've had quite a few.
- 38:20What is a sipping cream?
- 38:21I've never heard this term.
- 38:24It is so upset.
- 38:26It's mood side, bro.
- 38:28Okay.
- 38:29It's just.
- 38:31It is very creamy.
- 38:33So it's got the mouthfeel of milk.
- 38:37The mouthfeel of milk.
- 38:38Yeah.
- 38:39The mouthfeel of milk and the flavor of egg or waffle and the kick of a shot of bullet bourbon.
- 38:46Oh, this is the perfect intro to discuss the movie Mandy,
- 38:50because this conversation is just as unhinged.
- 38:55I'm still waiting for hot dog water flavored ice cream.
- 38:58Full tilt.
- 38:59One day.
- 38:59Yeah.
- 39:00I would love to be licking down on a creamy hot dog water cone.
- 39:04Oh, God, that really yucked me out.
- 39:07Real quick before we start discussing Mandy.
- 39:09Chris, what is it you do?
- 39:11Like, who are you besides a guy I met right after high school?
- 39:15You mean besides the guy you met after high school
- 39:17and the current undergraduate service coordinator for SS State University's psychology department?
- 39:22I am also.
- 39:23I love when people just straight up dox themselves on our podcast
- 39:27because I'm about to get into some really fucking gross shit to talk about.
- 39:30I already told you they can't touch me, guys.
- 39:32In addition to that, I am also an e-sports analyst,
- 39:37particularly focusing on fighting games.
- 39:39I travel the world commentating and basically talking about video games for a living.
- 39:44I most recently was spotted at Tokyo Game Show in October,
- 39:49basically being a booth babe at the SNK booth for their upcoming release of Fatal Theory,
- 39:54City of the Wolves.
- 39:56Holy shit.
- 39:57Yeah, man, they're making another Fatal Theory.
- 39:58It's crazy, right?
- 39:59I know.
- 40:00I'm fucking so excited.
- 40:04Yeah, it's awesome.
- 40:05No, SNK invited me out.
- 40:06They we hung out in Japan for a couple of weeks and
- 40:10they paid me to basically stand in front around the booth, teach people how to play the game.
- 40:15I'm glad one of us made it.
- 40:18Did I?
- 40:19Did I make it?
- 40:21I mean, you're doing it.
- 40:21I don't know.
- 40:22You're doing stuff, too.
- 40:23What are you talking about, man?
- 40:24I'm talking about Nicolas Cage for.
- 40:26Oh, that's true.
- 40:27Yes, you are talking about Nicolas Cage.
- 40:28I'm talking about the two people.
- 40:30We've got more than 12.
- 40:33Oh, that's right.
- 40:34I was thinking about the toilet cams again.
- 40:36Chris, have you seen Mandy before this?
- 40:39I can't remember.
- 40:40No, I hadn't seen it until you told me that we were going to do this show.
- 40:45Because this seems something that would be up your alley from
- 40:47our old getting trashed with Kevin and watching bad movies at 3 a.m. days.
- 40:53Absolutely.
- 40:54You know, like I mean, if if it had been in my normal circle of streaming platforms,
- 41:02I probably would have seen it already.
- 41:03But it's on the Amazon platform, which is like a 50 50.
- 41:06It's on Amazon or it's on Amazon as another subscription option.
- 41:11Basically, right.
- 41:12Right.
- 41:13So I just it just kind of slipped under my radar because it was a pay option,
- 41:18which is weird because that other cage movie that was basically
- 41:21Five Nights at Freddy's was free on Amazon.
- 41:24Will is Wonderland.
- 41:25Yeah.
- 41:26The superior of the films to like.
- 41:29Oh, versus Five Nights.
- 41:30Yeah.
- 41:30Yeah.
- 41:31Yeah, I have to agree with that.
- 41:33And I didn't even see Five Nights with my daughter.
- 41:35Then she was like, yeah, it's kind of kind of ass, you know.
- 41:39Well, show her Willie's Wonderland.
- 41:42That's a bad phrase.
- 41:44Yeah.
- 41:45Words that shouldn't come out of Sean's mouth.
- 41:47You say hold on a second, brother.
- 41:50That doesn't work for me, brother.
- 41:51Yeah.
- 41:55So what was your takeaway from Mandy for your first viewing of it?
- 41:58I mean, it's this fucking wild movie.
- 42:00It is extremely wild.
- 42:02The first thing that I saw, first of all, I'm going to say I actually enjoyed it quite a bit.
- 42:08I'm kind of biased, though, for a couple of reasons.
- 42:11One love Nick Cage movies, good and bad, two huge heavy metal fan.
- 42:16So the entire vibe of the movie was like, oh, yeah, we're doing it.
- 42:21Fuck. Yeah, bro.
- 42:23I'm right there all the way.
- 42:24Is it heavy metal, the music or heavy metal, the animated film that you're a fan of?
- 42:29The music mostly.
- 42:31I mean, the film is.
- 42:31Yeah, I like the film, too, but mostly just like the the the imagery and the vibe
- 42:37that is created by most of the bands I listen to was kind of represented well in this movie.
- 42:43And you get that right out the gate.
- 42:45Like it's a very light, dark and like sludgy kind of opening.
- 42:50And it felt like I'm listening to like some stoner metal band
- 42:53in a rusty barn somewhere in Tennessee, basically, as I'm watching this movie.
- 42:59My takeaway, though, is that I actually don't know why they called it a horror movie.
- 43:04I felt more John Wick than I felt like slasher flick, you know?
- 43:08Yeah, it's got the revenge vibe for sure.
- 43:10I mean, an hour of the movie is revenge cycle, you know?
- 43:14Right. For a two hour movie.
- 43:16I guess you could say like the first act is about as horror as it gets because the vibe
- 43:21is entirely just like tense.
- 43:24Everything is just I guess the only way I can describe it as something feels off the entire time.
- 43:29Like they seem happy.
- 43:30The couple seems happy, but something seems off.
- 43:33And I know something bad is going to happen.
- 43:34But at every moment, almost every scene, it feels like it could happen at any moment.
- 43:39Is it going to happen now?
- 43:39Is it going to happen here?
- 43:41And ultimately, it felt a little on the nose the way the incident occurred.
- 43:46And we can get into that later.
- 43:47But I don't I thought the movie did a good job of like building that tension.
- 43:52This is definitely one of those movies that I don't really I don't feel really fits into
- 43:57any singular genre, which is probably why it's some weird artsy film made by a director
- 44:01who's only made two movies.
- 44:04Of weird artsy films.
- 44:06Right. Both artsy weird movies.
- 44:08What was the other movie he made because I did some research.
- 44:11Rambo. Yeah.
- 44:13Yeah, that was like I have to I still have to watch that.
- 44:16But I just remember reading about that thing and like, OK, this guy definitely doesn't
- 44:20just make movies to be making movies, right?
- 44:22Which is funny because he's working with Nick Cage, who makes movies to be making movies.
- 44:24Something out of his system.
- 44:26Yeah, exactly. Something is moving through this man.
- 44:29Nick Cage does the working actor thing, but every once in a while he'll he does stuff like
- 44:33this too, because he genuinely like wants to do weird shit.
- 44:37Absolutely. And it's a spectra vision, too.
- 44:39So it's tied to Elijah Wood and, you know, he and Elijah are both like horror movies
- 44:43and that kind of stuff.
- 44:44So I don't think it was like doing a favor necessarily.
- 44:46I think he really genuinely wanted to be in something like this.
- 44:49He really chewed the scenery and like the role he plays is it.
- 44:54At first, I was kind of like.
- 44:57He's a little too mild mannered for me, so I couldn't really believe the unhinged.
- 45:03I was I knew he was going to have the transformation eventually, but I was not sure I would believe it.
- 45:10And then it happens and I'm like, oh, yeah, he's he's nailing it.
- 45:12That man's falling apart.
- 45:15That brain is falling off the bone, bro.
- 45:18How did you like his knock knock joke?
- 45:23Bro, just knock knock.
- 45:27Who's there?
- 45:28Erica Strada.
- 45:30Erica Strada who?
- 45:31Erica Strada from chips.
- 45:33It was from she is.
- 45:35She is.
- 45:36I'm like, put some horny on that.
- 45:41Every time I hear that joke, I'm like, this is just absurd.
- 45:45Yeah, I think so.
- 45:47I've got like mixed feelings on this movie just in general.
- 45:50But the thing that I struggle with most is feeling anything about Mandy, the character,
- 45:58like she's just kind of nothing to me.
- 46:01And then he's also to your point, Chris, he's also kind of nothing to start with.
- 46:05Right.
- 46:05Like they're just sort of this like tame couple having a bland dinner and then like talking
- 46:10about planets for a little bit and then falling asleep.
- 46:14You know, it's like.
- 46:16Cool.
- 46:17They seem super happy, man.
- 46:18They do seem happy.
- 46:19I will give you that.
- 46:20I will give you that.
- 46:21I think it's less about the character, Mandy, and just like, you know, it's like, you know,
- 46:26very milk toast, like safe couple gets their entire world fucked up and guy just snaps.
- 46:36Yeah, I think you care more about Red and Red's like pain in losing Mandy.
- 46:44Like Mandy doesn't have to mean anything to us, but it's what she meant to him that you're
- 46:49supposed to care about.
- 46:50Right.
- 46:51That's fair.
- 46:51I appreciate that she laughed at Jeremiah's penis.
- 46:54Me too.
- 46:55Yeah. So I was not super impressed by Jeremiah as a villain.
- 47:00I pretty much called in my mind.
- 47:03I called it immediately.
- 47:04Oh, this is a guy that is absolutely paper thin, fragile, marshmallow.
- 47:11No, he's a cult leader.
- 47:12Right.
- 47:12Not only laughing at his penis, but his music.
- 47:15Oh, man.
- 47:17Like, like, Sean, Sean, we know if you laugh at the music, you can't come over no more.
- 47:21You and I know that I just love his immediate reaction to being laughed at was just to fucking
- 47:27angrily jacket.
- 47:29Yeah, it's like, knock it off.
- 47:31I'm going to get real bad soon.
- 47:34Starting to get upset.
- 47:37Yeah, Jeremiah Sands album would be terrific.
- 47:40Do you think they made I mean, they made fucking Cheddar Goblin for this.
- 47:42Do you think they made a whole album of his music?
- 47:45Cheddar Goblin is amazing.
- 47:46Cheddar Goblin is amazing.
- 47:48I thought there was should have been there should have been at least 80% more Cheddar Goblin.
- 47:52Honestly, like I absolutely love this film, and there's like a slow like there's a slow
- 47:58build to the horror that, you know, the revenge aspect of it for the first hour.
- 48:04Small attention to detail.
- 48:05And then at a certain point, the movie just says, fuck it, we're done with the plot.
- 48:10We're going to kill him.
- 48:11And that is when for no reason, he is in a cave, smelting an actual monster.
- 48:17Smelting an axe.
- 48:20There are several points in this movie where I didn't fall asleep at all.
- 48:25I was watching it all the way through it.
- 48:27And there's several points in this movie where I'm like, wait, how the hell did we get here?
- 48:32I'm still not sure how he flips the truck.
- 48:35Right. Like that one.
- 48:36What the heck?
- 48:37The hellraiser dudes are just like extra strong.
- 48:41I don't know.
- 48:42I mean, a famous man once said cocaine is a hell of a drug.
- 48:46So yeah.
- 48:48And they were on some what?
- 48:50That super meth or something.
- 48:51Yeah. That weird gray Vaseline.
- 48:54Super acid.
- 48:56That the guy with the tiger made, I assume.
- 48:59Yeah. The chemist.
- 49:00Yeah. Because that's how he gets to the chemist because he
- 49:02he has the vision after tasting it.
- 49:04So yeah.
- 49:05Which apparently unlocks your GPS powers.
- 49:09The other 80% of the brain like guy just had like the most intense strength
- 49:14that he never knew he had.
- 49:16I was a little I was kind of hoping that the bikers were actually demons, though.
- 49:20Like I kind of felt like they really sold like this guy's got fucking claws, bro.
- 49:23Like he's touching his face.
- 49:25He's got these super long claws on his fingers.
- 49:27Like he's got to be an animal.
- 49:28And it turns out now he's just on meth.
- 49:30Right. Doesn't cut his nails like, oh, OK.
- 49:32But they are summoned by the horn of a Braxis.
- 49:35They are summoned by the horn of a Braxis.
- 49:36They have superhuman hearing.
- 49:38Which is an ocarina.
- 49:41Oh, I love the horn of a Braxis.
- 49:42It's so fucking dorky.
- 49:43Yeah, I love the just like world of supernatural that exists around this film.
- 49:49And you just buy into it because you're in the shadow mountains in 1983, I suppose.
- 49:54Yeah.
- 49:54But the horn of a Braxis and the the pale blade of whatever the.
- 50:00Oh, man.
- 50:01What's called a strobe lights.
- 50:03But yeah, and I like the like lighting cues that are just so like, I don't know,
- 50:08they're very over the top, but it's like, oh, here's the.
- 50:13Horn of a Braxis green supernatural light like flickering.
- 50:16It lends something really interesting to the film for me.
- 50:20So this is my first time watching this film in my new place.
- 50:23I have a better set up where my TV is, where there's not a bunch of like outside light.
- 50:26And I got some backlights from my screen so I can actually see better details in dark now.
- 50:32I never noticed in the scene where Mandy's getting burned in the sack that like you can
- 50:36see bits of her face through the sack through the fire.
- 50:38Oh, shit. Really?
- 50:39Well, you see, like, it's just like any of the things that you see in the film.
- 50:42It's so much like it's so much worse, like actually seeing like aspects of a human body
- 50:49in there. Yeah, that's that's fucking gnarly.
- 50:52There's so many more little like details I noticed on this watch.
- 50:56And I fucking I just love this movie.
- 51:00It's weird and it's gross and I love it.
- 51:01It's a weird, fun movie.
- 51:03I will say, though, the way she died kind of felt like I mean, that was the way it had to happen.
- 51:09Right. If you're going to set this man off, you make him watch her die
- 51:12and they pick the most horrible way to do it.
- 51:14But I also felt like, yeah, it was anticlimactic.
- 51:17There was it was obviously supposed to be the trigger point.
- 51:19And they they kind of rushed it, I guess.
- 51:22I felt like I wasn't really like we were we mentioned earlier, we didn't really care about
- 51:26Mandy, but it's not about us caring about Mandy.
- 51:28It's about how Red chose about Mandy.
- 51:30And I feel like they were really trying to hammer home that she's a plot device, guys.
- 51:36Don't get attached. She's going down.
- 51:39Even if you didn't read the synopsis, you know, it's coming.
- 51:42Like one of the most like one of the most upsetting and triggering points of the film,
- 51:46like the trigger point for the film is when Mandy dies.
- 51:49That's immediately juxtaposed with Red in his tighty whities,
- 51:53just screaming and stomping around.
- 51:55That is so that was the part that sold me when he's just having the mental breakdown.
- 52:02Hits the hits the bottle goes right to the rod.
- 52:05It's not helping hits it again.
- 52:07Gets that bathroom hooch that bathroom hooch.
- 52:09He just immediately grabbed this.
- 52:11He's like, I'm gonna need this for a while.
- 52:13Yeah, man, like I felt like that was like probably one of the most human performances
- 52:17I've ever seen from Nick, honestly.
- 52:19That's actually a really good way of putting it.
- 52:21I mean, for like a real over the top fucking movie.
- 52:23Yes.
- 52:24Human ass scene, right?
- 52:26Yeah.
- 52:26Like, do people really think about how would I act if the person I love just got killed
- 52:29right in front of me?
- 52:30Like, what is the response to that?
- 52:31And I don't think anyone has an answer other than like cry, pray.
- 52:35I don't know.
- 52:35But there's no way to capture that unless you're you've been through it, I guess.
- 52:40And he had also like just been through some real shit, too, like being tortured and like
- 52:46bound up with barbed wire and having to like free himself from that after seeing this incident.
- 52:51So there's a lot of trauma that gets unpacked in that moment of bathroom vodka.
- 52:59Yeah.
- 52:59And you know, a lot of movies use this.
- 53:02A lot of movies will use that plot device to turn the hero into the hero he needs to be.
- 53:07But they never really focus on the transformation.
- 53:10They're just like, the hero's mad.
- 53:12He wants revenge.
- 53:13He now has superhuman strength and he's suddenly good with like every type of weapon known
- 53:17to man, essentially.
- 53:18Right.
- 53:18I mean, that's basically John Wick.
- 53:19They kill his dog.
- 53:20All of a sudden, I'm back.
- 53:23I felt like it was just about him becoming the monster.
- 53:25Like he becomes the monster.
- 53:26Yeah.
- 53:26The transformation is really the center stage here.
- 53:29Like I really enjoyed watching him go through that moment, come out of it, not really OK.
- 53:36Goes to Bill Duke, rather Carruthers.
- 53:39By the way, shout out to Bill Duke.
- 53:40Love him.
- 53:42Goes.
- 53:45Bill Duke is like way more unhinged than he is.
- 53:49And I think the transformation is it's still happening in that scene.
- 53:54It's happening after that.
- 53:55It's happening all the way up to the point where he's like,
- 53:57it's happening all the way up to the point where he's in the car at the end.
- 54:01Probably the only scary moment in the movie happens where he smiles at the camera and
- 54:05he's got super white teeth.
- 54:08I'm curious to hear what you guys think in terms of like what what happens to Red now?
- 54:12Does he like does he just be is he the monster now?
- 54:16Does he like go and kill people like because he's not coming back.
- 54:19Like he's not just going to like drive off into the sunset.
- 54:23I mean, his whole worldview now is just he sees monsters and alien landscapes.
- 54:27Everywhere like what does that person do?
- 54:30Does he fashion his own like penis knife?
- 54:33I still strongly believe that Red goes off and now he is the janitor from Willie's Wonderland.
- 54:41So he drives off into the wilderness and now he's just an ultimate badass
- 54:47defeating other evils in the world.
- 54:50Supernatural evils.
- 54:51I really do like that theory.
- 54:54It kind of makes sense.
- 54:55I mean, having seen both of those movies, it's like because his character is the janitor
- 54:59in that movie is like what?
- 55:01Why is he mute?
- 55:02Why is he anything?
- 55:03It's like, oh, right, because he's seen some shit.
- 55:05Do you have a favorite a favorite death in this film?
- 55:09A favorite murder?
- 55:11Mine hands down is always going to be the mouth breather.
- 55:13I'm getting the.
- 55:13The best.
- 55:15Yeah, there are so many really good ones that are like so fun, but him polishing the car
- 55:20and like really just having a moment there.
- 55:23It's like, I, I, I, I, I, it's not the death specifically, but like the bald guy who like
- 55:31deep throats, the pointy.
- 55:33Oh, yes.
- 55:34When he gets pulled out of the car, he just goes, you're hurting me.
- 55:38Yeah, that's so good.
- 55:40Honestly, the third biker that he takes down, not the one that is taking a piss outside on
- 55:47the car, which I honestly didn't even realize that dude was there the whole time.
- 55:53I thought there was.
- 55:54I feel like there was three of them, but all of a sudden there's four.
- 55:58I don't know the movie.
- 55:59It does a bad job of explaining to you exactly what these guys are and how many there are.
- 56:03So the one that's watching the TV, I think that was my favorite on the sequence.
- 56:07Knife deck.
- 56:08Yeah.
- 56:09You know, I've never done a bunch of coke and watched porn.
- 56:11I wonder what it's like to just be that high and looking at porn.
- 56:16Like, would I be super excited?
- 56:18Well, it was a little, little high and a little horny.
- 56:21Yeah, a little bit high, a little bit horny.
- 56:26We all appreciate the mouth breather dying after polishing his car.
- 56:32Yeah, just the axe spinning through the air and so good.
- 56:35That's a great death.
- 56:36I think the visual of that one is my favorite.
- 56:39So simple.
- 56:40I really appreciate the aesthetic of the beast, the axe.
- 56:43And I think it's so beautifully like 80s metal, like it's shiny, it's chrome,
- 56:52it's got a weird asymmetrical build.
- 56:56It's got a point.
- 56:58That's still in the front runner for my Nick Cage theme tattoo right now.
- 57:02I can't I haven't thought of anything else visually that except for the fuck you fish.
- 57:08Fuck you fish.
- 57:09The tuna, the fucking fish.
- 57:12When they go to fucking.
- 57:13Oh, big tuna.
- 57:14There's just the like metal fish on the outside outskirts of town.
- 57:17So, yeah, OK.
- 57:19I forgot about that.
- 57:21I forgot it said fuck you on it.
- 57:23But yeah, big tuna.
- 57:24Hell, yeah, that's a good idea.
- 57:26I like that.
- 57:28Fuck you fish.
- 57:29I don't know which one would be harder to explain to people who see me naked.
- 57:33Well, get the fuck you fish as a tramp stamp.
- 57:35Perfect.
- 57:36That would be nice.
- 57:37That totally works, actually.
- 57:38Yeah.
- 57:39Overall, I feel like this movie is one of the more tamer cage films I've seen.
- 57:46I'm from an era where he I guess you could say I was watching his slump in the 90s.
- 57:53And those a lot of those ended up being some of my favorite movies, honestly, like the slump movies.
- 57:58Obviously enjoy face off.
- 58:01But to me, Nick Cage overacting is kind of my favorite cage.
- 58:07That being said, didn't leave a lot of room for that here.
- 58:10And I still enjoyed it.
- 58:11I could tell he enjoyed making the movie.
- 58:12That was the best part for me.
- 58:15I think there were moments where he really just lost himself in the scenery, which I'm sure he does often, but literally felt like he was the guy.
- 58:25You know, he's not Nick.
- 58:27He's red for the next 90 minutes.
- 58:29One of the best things that this movie does is it eliminates a lot of dialogue, you know, until you get to see that kind of himself, like him engulfing himself in a character.
- 58:41You get to see that happen in real time rather than him telling you, oh, yeah, I'm red.
- 58:45I'm red.
- 58:46I'm red.
- 58:46I hate these guys.
- 58:47They killed my wife.
- 58:48Blah, blah, blah.
- 58:49You know, he's showing you the entire time that he is not a well man.
- 58:55He will never be well again.
- 58:56He will never be well again, and he does it without saying anything.
- 59:01In a way, it's a lot like the what was the Five Nights at Freddy's knockoff.
- 59:05It's a lot like that where he just doesn't say anything.
- 59:07Really wonderland.
- 59:08There we go.
- 59:09Whoever wrote this film was like, you just there's not a lot of dialogue we're going to be showing you with emotions and with violence and just basically raw, visceral shit.
- 59:18Yeah, man, like I feel like this is about as artsy as it gets for Nick Cage.
- 59:23So like they could have had some more louder guitars.
- 59:26They kind of had one in that one fight scene where he got the chainsaw and the dude just had a bigger fucking chainsaw.
- 59:33I don't think that's something we've touched really touched on a lot talking about this movie as many times as we have is like there is humor in it.
- 59:39There is comedy.
- 59:40There are comedy beats that I don't think we give enough credit to.
- 59:43And like, yeah, like, dude, like him showing up with the chainsaw, like trying to rev it up and just that big fucker just being like, yeah, bigger chainsaw.
- 59:51This is a chainsaw.
- 59:53Do you call that a chainsaw?
- 59:54Little evil dead moments kind of sprinkled in throughout where it still totally serves the purpose of the story and the film doesn't suffer for it.
- 1:00:06But you get that break in the tension and a little bit of a laugh, a little bit horny, a little bit horny.
- 1:00:13I think it's because of the of the evil dead vibe that I kind of expected some more supernatural shit, a little more on the nose stuff.
- 1:00:24I mean, it didn't hurt that it wasn't there, but I was kind of like, man, it'd be really cool if this Jeremiah dude was actually what he's fucking said he was.
- 1:00:33Yeah, instead of just being kind of a whimpering little fucking cuck.
- 1:00:37Basically, yeah, I felt like at the end I'm like, no, I called it immediately.
- 1:00:41He's a little pussy.
- 1:00:41I get it.
- 1:00:42But what if he wasn't?
- 1:00:44What if like in the middle of begging for his life, he sprouts fucking shark teeth and bites his dick off?
- 1:00:48Well, because you're right.
- 1:00:49There's that moment where he's like, I'll suck your dick, man.
- 1:00:52And then he's like, no, wait, you bow before me.
- 1:00:55And it's like that would be that power moment.
- 1:00:57But it's not.
- 1:00:57I would be in that moment.
- 1:00:58Right.
- 1:00:58Yeah.
- 1:00:58I was like, oh, shit, here we go, guys.
- 1:01:00And no, he's just a pussy.
- 1:01:03I felt like he portrayed a fragile villain really well.
- 1:01:09But I was just like, man, what if he's fragile and ego, but not in body?
- 1:01:12Those are the best kind of villain, in my opinion.
- 1:01:14You saw his dick.
- 1:01:15There's nothing hard there.
- 1:01:19I don't know if we can end on a better note.
- 1:01:25Thanks, Chris.
- 1:01:26Do you want to plug anything?
- 1:01:27You got anything coming up that you want people to know about?
- 1:01:30So I mean, other than pitching Fatal Fury City, the wolves by it, play it.
- 1:01:34I'm going to be probably one of the main commentators for that.
- 1:01:38So you'll be seeing a lot of me if you're watching streams for that.
- 1:01:40You can also catch me weekly on twitch.tv slash game goons,
- 1:01:44where I stream video games of all kinds, try to do it weekly.
- 1:01:48But you know what real life gets in the way.
- 1:01:51And other than that, you know, yeah, stay in school.
- 1:01:54Drink that Ego sipping cream.
- 1:01:56It's OK for him to goon with the games and not us for goon.
- 1:02:00Listen, man, gooning is different.
- 1:02:04Gooning is different now.
- 1:02:05I've been hearing it for the last three years.
- 1:02:09I go to an event in Vegas annually called EVO.
- 1:02:12It's a fighting game tournament.
- 1:02:13And every night before it starts on Thursday night, I have a suite
- 1:02:17where all of our fans and followers can come and play and hang out with us.
- 1:02:21I can't call the goon suite.
- 1:02:24I've been doing it since 2016.
- 1:02:26The last three years, people will be calling like people will really message me
- 1:02:30and say, it's called the what suite?
- 1:02:31It's the word changed, people.
- 1:02:35It's the goon suite.
- 1:02:36It's where you go to come.
- 1:02:39I hate this language.
- 1:02:43Ben, don't chew my toe.
- 1:02:45Yes, I know you got to go outside.
- 1:02:46Give me give me 15 minutes.
- 1:02:48Ben's into some freaky shit.
- 1:02:50He's up here shrimping.
- 1:02:52I forgot about shrimp.
- 1:02:54Oh, man, I'm always thinking about shrimp.
- 1:02:57Boo.
- 1:03:00Now, these I think we had two really good guests for two really good movies
- 1:03:04and both made great fucking points.
- 1:03:06Yeah, I agree with you.
- 1:03:07And this was one of those that I was kind of like dreading because, you know,
- 1:03:10I mixed feelings on Mandy and I think I finally got my finger on why
- 1:03:16I don't love it as much because I should.
- 1:03:19Like it's it's visually stunning.
- 1:03:21It's interesting.
- 1:03:22It moves at a clip, even though it's long.
- 1:03:24And I think what it is for me is it makes me feel like a little embarrassed.
- 1:03:29And it reminds me of being like 10 and looking at my older brother's like
- 1:03:35cool, dark comic books about like, you know, sorcerers and shit and like
- 1:03:40making up my own dumb stories without actually reading any of it
- 1:03:43and just looking at the cool art.
- 1:03:45And I think that's how I feel about this, where it's like it's a series of
- 1:03:49beautiful paintings with like a loose story that's kind of tying it all together.
- 1:03:55And I'm like, it feels like I could have written that story when I was younger
- 1:03:58and it would have been stupid and I would have felt embarrassed about it.
- 1:04:02So you would have had some boob drawings and then I don't know, there's a tiger
- 1:04:08and drugs, drugs, drugs.
- 1:04:11That's interesting because so I mean, that's I I get that and I like that.
- 1:04:16And it's but it's one of those things where I'm like, there are movies of when
- 1:04:20I was younger that like kind of had this metal aesthetic and this like
- 1:04:25the hyperviolence, the boobs and all that stuff that I would cringe at now.
- 1:04:30I'm thinking of fucking the crow as one of those era of films.
- 1:04:36But like this because of the cinematography, because of the intensity of the character
- 1:04:44and just how much it actually just leans into not trying to be a studio film.
- 1:04:51I think it this this holds up better and this has much more like weight behind it,
- 1:04:58where I don't feel that kind of awkward, like adolescent, like first boner shame.
- 1:05:05No, I think you're spot on.
- 1:05:06It's a better representation of it.
- 1:05:08I think that's just what I was finally tapping into because I've thought about like
- 1:05:11what makes me uncomfortable about this movie every time I've watched it.
- 1:05:14And at first I thought it was because it was grimy.
- 1:05:16And then I was like, I don't like violence that much.
- 1:05:18But I don't know.
- 1:05:19So anyway, I think that's my my final feeling on it is that it's like
- 1:05:23it just makes me feel a little bit dorky.
- 1:05:27Yeah, I think there is just something incredibly dorky about this film.
- 1:05:31Like there I that might be just a side effect of the like kind of fantasy pulp novel
- 1:05:40sort of kind of exists in it.
- 1:05:42That's an interesting take that I hadn't considered that like this there is the trope
- 1:05:47of like the revenge, like the revenge fantasy, the revenge thriller, like, you know,
- 1:05:53normal guy gets revenge on those who wronged him.
- 1:05:56But this movie pushes that to the point where it's like, like Chris said, you know,
- 1:06:01like you see how that transforms red, you see like, you know, there's the John Wick,
- 1:06:07like, oh, he's going to be a bad ass because he was wrong.
- 1:06:09It's like, no, he's broken.
- 1:06:11That's why he that's why he murders because they broke him.
- 1:06:15And now there's nothing about red that I think you want to be at the end of this.
- 1:06:21He's not the cool guy.
- 1:06:22He's just a monster now.
- 1:06:24He's just sad.
- 1:06:25Yeah, I think you're spot on.
- 1:06:26And then, I mean, on the other hand, speaking of cartoonish, you have a very cartoonish
- 1:06:31performance in Vampire's Kiss, too.
- 1:06:33Right.
- 1:06:34They're both like kind of absurd and kind of silly.
- 1:06:38And in response to like what performance stands out more, I definitely feel more
- 1:06:45inclined to say Vampire's Kiss in that it I mean, it was a film of performance choices
- 1:06:53and it it highlights Nicolas Cage, whereas like, well, as Chris said,
- 1:07:00like you could have put somebody else in as read.
- 1:07:03Keith Urban, who I think is a country singer.
- 1:07:05Car.
- 1:07:07Didn't you say Carl Urban?
- 1:07:08Isn't he the guy?
- 1:07:09He said, Keith Urban.
- 1:07:10He said, Keith Urban, which is a country singer.
- 1:07:13You could probably put Keith Urban in there.
- 1:07:14I don't know.
- 1:07:17But he met Carl Urban, I assume.
- 1:07:19Yeah, undoubtedly.
- 1:07:21Although I don't know.
- 1:07:22I'm not going to put words in his mouth.
- 1:07:23It could have been Keith Urban.
- 1:07:25We'll find out.
- 1:07:25Yeah.
- 1:07:26Chris struck me as like a big country pop person.
- 1:07:29Yeah.
- 1:07:29Vampire's Kiss just has like such a could only happen once sort of element
- 1:07:37and feel to the film sort of like Mandy.
- 1:07:39So they both have to exist as white whales, great white buffaloes, white jags.
- 1:07:45White Jags.
- 1:07:46They're all these are both white jags.
- 1:07:48We got there.
- 1:07:49Like both Chris and Lauren both kind of pointed out for both these films is just like these
- 1:07:53movies cannot be remade.
- 1:07:55These movies cannot exist now.
- 1:07:57I think in terms of comparing the two, Vampire's Kiss is very much sold on Nick Cage's performance.
- 1:08:05Be that performance good or bad, like it there are performance choices and the movie is that character.
- 1:08:14Whereas I think Mandy as a whole is a much better film and is much stronger.
- 1:08:19Like the some of its parts is much better, but it's not sold on like maybe Nick Cage gets you in the door,
- 1:08:27but that's not what's going to keep you there.
- 1:08:31Vampire's Kiss is the far more approachable film to people are going to be put off by Mandy.
- 1:08:40Peter is put off by Mandy and like that's a it's totally fine.
- 1:08:45It doesn't detract from the film.
- 1:08:47But in terms of our experiment here, too, it's hard to ignore the fact that one of them is very niche.
- 1:08:55And the other one is very niche.
- 1:08:59Alice Cage and I mean, I you and I talked about this briefly that I can't recommend Mandy to most people.
- 1:09:11No, certainly not like on a first date.
- 1:09:15Wait, didn't your date like watch Mandy before you guys?
- 1:09:19She got. Yeah, I I'd asked her.
- 1:09:22We were texting and asked her if she'd ever watched Mandy and she said no.
- 1:09:25And I'm like, that's a fucking trip.
- 1:09:26And I like sent her a photo of the scene I was watching, which is him in his tighty whitey's in the bathroom.
- 1:09:31And she laughed and she's like, I'm going to put it on right now.
- 1:09:33She's like, I'm falling asleep.
- 1:09:34So I don't know how much I'll get into.
- 1:09:36And when I asked her last night how far she got into it, she's like, I got to her crying at the stillborn deer and passed out.
- 1:09:42I'm like, that's probably the safest place to fall asleep.
- 1:09:46That's a good out. Yeah.
- 1:09:49I don't know. I've been going back and forth on both of these films in terms of what I would want to see go forward.
- 1:09:57And I put on Vampire's Kiss this morning and for him alone, I think that's that's my vote.
- 1:10:05I'm definitely in the it was a hard decision, but Vampire's Kiss for me.
- 1:10:12Not only is it just a compelling film to watch because you don't know what's going to happen next, it's just so interesting trying to think how he got to the point of making these choices.
- 1:10:28Like how many of them were just spur of the moment things that he did.
- 1:10:32It's I don't know. Like I am just completely captivated by this performance.
- 1:10:38It just holds me and I'm like, there's nothing else like it. I love it.
- 1:10:43When I put it on, I just started smiling.
- 1:10:45I was like, this fucking movie.
- 1:10:47Yeah, it is one of those things.
- 1:10:49It's like, oh, I get to fucking watch Vampire's Kiss tonight.
- 1:10:53And when I was watching these, I watched them in a hotel room on traveling for work.
- 1:10:58And there wasn't even like a thought of which one am I going to watch tonight?
- 1:11:01It's just like I booted up the the old iPad and Vampire's Kiss.
- 1:11:07And it's like, oh, OK, well, I mean, that's a pretty strong and strong.
- 1:11:10These movies are both.
- 1:11:11These are both movies like we get to watch it.
- 1:11:13Like we're at the part of this record where we get to watch the movies we like.
- 1:11:17I think for me, I will probably wind up watching Mandy Moore over the course of my life, like start to finish.
- 1:11:24Whereas with Vampire's Kiss, I'm probably like I'll watch it again.
- 1:11:29But I mostly when I'm getting that itch, I'll probably just look up scenes from it as opposed to watching the whole piece.
- 1:11:37Make it official.
- 1:11:40It is decided.
- 1:11:42I did not hear that at all.
- 1:11:44Interesting.
- 1:11:44Well, tap it on the microphone.
- 1:11:48No, nothing.
- 1:11:50Weird.
- 1:11:52Clippity clop, cloop clop.
- 1:11:54I'm a judge.
- 1:11:55Did you hear that?
- 1:11:57Yes.
- 1:11:57Also, that is now the sound of him decide of it being decided.
- 1:12:02I agree.
- 1:12:03We're going to I mean, we're going to piss off some horses, but fuck them.
- 1:12:07Fuck those horses.
- 1:12:08Oh, man.
- 1:12:09All right.
- 1:12:09Thank you all for listening.
- 1:12:10If you want to chat with us on social media, we're at Cage underscore match underscore pod.
- 1:12:14Or if you want to support us on Patreon, we are cage match pod.
- 1:12:17And thank you to our Sparkle buddies, Josh, Sean, Josie, Rico, Matt, Adam and Bill.
- 1:12:22And to our cage dancers, Ira, John, Freeman, Lance, Nathan and.
- 1:12:26Cameron and yeah, clip clop.
- 1:12:32Clip clop.
- 1:12:44And you get really into I need to learn how to like make like foam costumes, like proper
- 1:12:49mascot costumes.
- 1:12:50Oh, that's an investment.
- 1:12:52I'm going to go.
- 1:12:53I'm going to be on YouTube for the rest of the day, like learning how to like a felt.
- 1:12:57I should start with I should start with a more scaled head.
- 1:13:02I'll make a I'll make a one to one head of neck that I can wear.
- 1:13:08One to one.
- 1:13:09Yeah, my giant melon.
- 1:13:11You still can fit in.
- 1:13:12Yeah.
- 1:13:13Shots fired so so gently.
- 1:13:15Wear it like a motorcycle helmet.
- 1:13:18Yeah.
- 1:13:18I'll take out an additional home loan or whatever just for the felt because you're going to
- 1:13:23need a lot of felt to cover this dome.
- 1:13:28So there's always a white elephant gift exchange.
- 1:13:31And last year I took home like this golden hand and an eight inch black dildo with a
- 1:13:38suction cup.
- 1:13:39Fucking awesome.
- 1:13:40Yeah.
- 1:13:41And I think the welcome to pound town sign also that's above our bed.
- 1:13:46We kept that.
- 1:13:47And this year I gave back the hand and the dildo, but sitting above those and concealing
- 1:13:54that I put in a Chuck Tingle book.
- 1:13:57So but again, the final days of pounding ass and found out that one of my friends is one
- 1:14:04degree of separation away from Chuck Tingle.
- 1:14:08They were asking me questions about who Chuck Tingle is.
- 1:14:10And they're like, what does he look like this and that?
- 1:14:13And I was like, oh, well, nobody knows because he wears a pink like sack over his head.
- 1:14:17That just says love is real on his forehead.
- 1:14:19And they're like, wait, that's Chuck Tingle.
- 1:14:22And apparently one of their friends is friends with him.
- 1:14:25Cool.
- 1:14:26Can we get him on the podcast?
- 1:14:29That would be an interesting episode.
- 1:14:30Yeah, we would have to do Chuck Tingle's podcast as well.
- 1:14:35I would I would be OK with that.
- 1:14:36I would go on Chuck Tingle's podcast.
- 1:14:38Let's talk about how love is real.
- 1:14:39Yeah.
- 1:14:41Buckaroos and.
- 1:14:42Yeah.
- 1:14:42How my ass can butt fuck my other ass or whatever.