Latest / You Know What I Mean? / The High Highs, The Low Lows - And Everything In Between

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The High Highs, The Low Lows - And Everything In Between · You Know What I Mean?

• 0:00
  Welcome to the You Know what I Mean podcast by Kate and
• 0:02
  Bethany. To keep up with us on the daily
• 0:05
  outside of the podcast, follow us at Canine Dog Training and
• 0:08
  Walking Dog Training on Instagram.
• 0:10
  To stay up to date with all of our newest episodes, like and
• 0:13
  subscribe. Now let's get to the show.
• 0:21
  This way I. Know hi hi how are.
• 0:25
  You. I'm doing pretty good.
• 0:28
  I feel like going into this podcast, it was like high of
• 0:32
  high last week. I was in like vibes to like I, I
• 0:36
  feel OK, and we'll obviously jump into like life updates, but
• 0:39
  then it's like we're we're at low of low coming on to this
• 0:43
  podcast. But this is life, right?
• 0:45
  It's. Just the reality of life.
• 0:46
  Yeah, yeah. Tell us what's going on.
• 0:49
  Yeah, so I obviously don't want to like, derail the entire
• 0:51
  podcast episode and have it be like all about me.
• 0:54
  But so last time we talked, obviously I was telling you guys
• 0:58
  we were heading to Savannah. I was heading to Savannah for a
• 1:01
  couple of nights with one of my girlfriends.
• 1:03
  So I drove. So it was last Wednesday, April
• 1:06
  Fools, which is like, joke's on me.
• 1:09
  Literally, I'm like F April Fools.
• 1:12
  So I was driving to where my sister and my niece live, and I
• 1:15
  was having, like a belated birthday lunch with my parents,
• 1:19
  and I was 10 minutes out from getting to their house.
• 1:24
  And I was like, in a great mood. I even had just talked to Casey
• 1:27
  and I was like, oh, I was gonna kind of pull a prank on my
• 1:29
  parents and, like, call and tell them I got a flat tire 'cause my
• 1:32
  mom's always been like the jokester of like April Fools.
• 1:35
  Oh, yeah. But we're all like, we all try
• 1:37
  to do one that's not gonna like actually freak someone out.
• 1:42
  Like my mom one year did. Like I fell down the stairs and
• 1:44
  I'm like, mom, I can't. No, I can't handle that.
• 1:46
  Like you can't. Do that.
• 1:48
  So I'm like, oh, I could do like, I'm gonna, you know, I got
• 1:50
  a flat tire or whatever. Yeah.
• 1:52
  But actually in Florida, we had noticed on Bertie's leg like a
• 1:58
  little bit of a lump and you know it, you kind of think as
• 2:02
  like she had just turned 7 and we're just thinking like lumps
• 2:05
  and bumps happen. But to give a little bit of back
• 2:08
  story, I know some people know about this.
• 2:09
  Obviously you and Bobby know all the details, but I have not like
• 2:12
  really outwardly. And I asked permission if I
• 2:14
  could talked about over a year ago.
• 2:18
  So it was January 2024. So it was a year this past
• 2:21
  January. Casey had a cancer diagnosis and
• 2:24
  that totally rocked our world. He had to have the surgery for
• 2:28
  an amputation and the type of cancer that it was, it requires
• 2:33
  us to luckily not do like any chemo or him to do any
• 2:36
  radiation, but a lot of scans and treatment.
• 2:39
  So that like really, really, really rocked us and still like
• 2:42
  it's something that, you know, Casey's going to therapy for.
• 2:45
  We are set up to go to our first therapy session together just to
• 2:49
  like continue to learn how to like best support each other.
• 2:53
  So whenever we notice something on our dogs or ourselves, we're
• 2:56
  very, very like, Oh my gosh, let's just make sure.
• 3:00
  So I brought birdie by myself to just get the little cyst as I
• 3:04
  thought it was checked out. And even when I was in there
• 3:07
  talking to the vet, she was kind of like, you know, this is so
• 3:10
  common for dogs to get like fatty tumors as they start to
• 3:12
  get older and things like that. So they took a sample of it.
• 3:15
  And if it was the fatty tumor thing, they would have been able
• 3:18
  to read that in house and they couldn't.
• 3:21
  So when I saw like both the vet and the vet tech come in, of
• 3:23
  course, my like, heart starts racing because she was like, if
• 3:26
  it, you know, I'll just have that tech come in basically, if
• 3:29
  it's, you know what we think it is.
• 3:31
  Oh, yeah. So when I see the vet come in
• 3:32
  too, I'm like, so she's like, we don't know what it is.
• 3:35
  She's like, I can't read it in house.
• 3:36
  Like again, I'm not too concerned.
• 3:38
  And when people tell me that now I'm like, I just don't even want
• 3:41
  to hear that. You're not like I, I try to say
• 3:43
  it like nicely. I'm like, you know what?
• 3:45
  I let's just get it sent out and I'll wait to get the feedback
• 3:48
  from you when you have it, because that's exactly what we
• 3:50
  were told with Casey is everything we went to was it'd
• 3:53
  be so rare. Like it's the, the chances of it
• 3:57
  being. So I'm like, I don't want to
• 3:59
  hear that stuff because it's it's not helpful for us from
• 4:04
  what we've been through. So on April Fools, 10 days or 10
• 4:09
  minutes before I get the call that it was cancer.
• 4:12
  And it is cancer. I shouldn't say it was on
• 4:15
  birdie. And when they told me what kind,
• 4:18
  like I lost it because it's like the same kind that Casey had.
• 4:23
  And so like my mind just starts going wild of like, sorry, I
• 4:29
  didn't think I was getting emotional because I felt like
• 4:30
  I've been doing OK. And I'm like, what's in our
• 4:33
  house? What's like in our soil?
• 4:36
  What? But like it's so it's like the
• 4:38
  more and we are doing a ton of testing just because we're like,
• 4:41
  we want to know, but it's so uncommon for humans to get this.
• 4:45
  And it's really not that uncommon for dogs too.
• 4:49
  So it's just we're thinking it's a fluke.
• 4:51
  But still we want to like double, triple check.
• 4:54
  So we're doing like every water testing you think you can do.
• 4:56
  I know mold testing has nothing to do with it, but we're
• 4:59
  getting, you know, additional mold testing in our home.
• 5:01
  Just it'll give us Peace of Mind.
• 5:02
  We're getting soil testing done because I don't think there's,
• 5:05
  we don't use any like pesticides or anything in our property, but
• 5:08
  like we bought up to a farm field.
• 5:09
  So I'm like, I don't know. So we're just like it rocked us
• 5:14
  because I'm like, not my birdie girl, like, you know, she's been
• 5:17
  our, you know, having it just feels like one thing after
• 5:20
  another after another after another.
• 5:22
  And I know you feel this and know that, but like with
• 5:26
  Roadie's health stuff and like luckily his energy's up and he's
• 5:29
  doing OK, but like he doesn't look healthy.
• 5:31
  You know, it's just like in like with birdie and it's like we try
• 5:35
  to go above and beyond to like feed everything, right?
• 5:38
  Just doing everything we possibly can.
• 5:41
  So that obviously just totally took us for a whirlwind.
• 5:46
  So we had her pre op appointment this morning and just had to do
• 5:51
  like a blood draw to make sure she's healthy and stuff to do
• 5:53
  anesthesia. We haven't gotten the results on
• 5:55
  that, which is normal. Like we just had the
• 5:57
  appointment, but we elected to do a chest CT just because of
• 6:01
  what we went through with Casey is since it's a soft tissue type
• 6:04
  of cancer, we were like, OK, well, even if it's just they
• 6:08
  think, you know, based on the pathology that was sent, they're
• 6:11
  like, we're really like feeling confident that's just in that
• 6:13
  area, like the removal of the tumor.
• 6:16
  And if there's any potentially some muscle will have to go on
• 6:20
  her leg and stuff. But we just are like, you know
• 6:24
  what, knowing it's soft tissue, like we want before we put her
• 6:28
  under the surgery, we want to check.
• 6:29
  So we elected to do radiology and stuff and check her X-rays
• 6:34
  and stuff. And based on what our vet said,
• 6:36
  she sees nothing, which is good. Yeah.
• 6:39
  So that was really good news, but she's like, I'm obviously
• 6:42
  not a radiologist. Like if you guys would feel more
• 6:45
  comfortable having it sent out to read.
• 6:47
  And I, I was like, you see nothing that would like concern
• 6:50
  you. And she's like, no.
• 6:51
  And so I was kind of like, okay, in case he was immediately like
• 6:53
  she was at this appointment with me, like, no, I want to send it
• 6:55
  out. So I'm like.
• 6:56
  Yeah, Yep. We'll we'll send it out.
• 6:58
  So I'm sure we're gonna the it'll still be good news, I'm
• 7:02
  assuming with that. And then so her you guys will be
• 7:06
  listening to this on Wednesday. So her her surgery will be a
• 7:08
  week from today, Wednesday, so a week from tomorrow that we're
• 7:12
  talking. So if you guys can just send all
• 7:14
  good vibes to our birdie girl, we would greatly, greatly
• 7:19
  appreciate it. It's just crazy that we're like
• 7:24
  we can't get away from this. It's like what, you know, it's
• 7:27
  just it you can't help but go through like, what did we do
• 7:30
  wrong? Like of course, what, what is
• 7:32
  this trying to teach us? Like this is crazy.
• 7:35
  And then the cherry on the top, and I just had to find humor in
• 7:37
  it at this point was that same night, you guys, I, I was again
• 7:42
  heading to Savannah with my girlfriend.
• 7:44
  She was the friend that was supposed to come visit when we
• 7:46
  were in Florida and we were flying a different airline that
• 7:49
  I normally didn't like wouldn't choose to fly.
• 7:52
  The only reason we're flying it is because she had to use the
• 7:55
  flight credit that she was coming to visit for Florida.
• 7:58
  And that's the whole reason we're like, well, let's go on a
• 8:00
  girls trip because like, you know.
• 8:02
  And so I'm like, oh, I should go download this app to make sure I
• 8:06
  can have like my boarding pass for the morning.
• 8:08
  I go on and it just says cancelled, my flight's
• 8:11
  cancelled. And I'm like FML like.
• 8:15
  God. What?
• 8:16
  Why I I do care. I do care, like I do fucking
• 8:21
  care. I'm like, I'm like, this has got
• 8:24
  to be a joke because she's my friend that like she's very like
• 8:27
  attention, like I'm shocked I didn't hear from her yet because
• 8:30
  she's like when if you were to travel with her, she'd be like
• 8:34
  at the airport plenty of time. She's got every I dotted every T
• 8:38
  crossed, like she knows she's got it covered.
• 8:41
  So I'm like, you know what, I'm gonna let her take the lead
• 8:44
  here. Like she booked my flight for
• 8:46
  me. Cool, we're good to go.
• 8:49
  So I text her. I'm like, hey, I don't know if
• 8:51
  it's just my app because I've never flown with them, but have
• 8:53
  you seen anything? And she literally since she
• 8:56
  booked it, she's like, I'm just getting the texts and emails
• 8:58
  right now. Like, and there was no other
• 9:01
  flights out, no other. And I, I again, I am looking at
• 9:04
  like, OK, you know, the universe made me knew I just needed to
• 9:07
  like be home and stuff like that.
• 9:08
  But at the same time, I really freaking wanted to go with my
• 9:11
  girlfriend. And there was nothing I was
• 9:12
  missing, you know, with birdie and stuff like that.
• 9:16
  I was already away from home. So the worst part, I think like
• 9:18
  I when I showed up to my sister's house, my parents were
• 9:22
  there. My mom like opened the door and
• 9:23
  she's like, hi and I'm just bawling and I'm like, I'm like,
• 9:26
  I'm. And then I was like so scared to
• 9:28
  walk in just because I didn't want to like traumatize Eloise.
• 9:31
  I was like, she's never seen me like this.
• 9:33
  Like it's OK for like they very much want her to be exposed to
• 9:37
  emotions and stuff like that. But like when your Kiki comes
• 9:41
  in, who's always like hi, my honey and I'm like bawling.
• 9:44
  She was just looking at me like, Oh my gosh.
• 9:46
  And my mom immediately was like, Oh my gosh, what's wrong?
• 9:49
  And I like couldn't get it fully out, but I was, I think all they
• 9:52
  heard was cancer and they're just like, Oh my gosh.
• 9:55
  And so I'm like trembling and like hugging my mom just by
• 9:59
  bawling. And I think the thing that was
• 10:01
  the most traumatic for me is like getting the news by myself,
• 10:04
  but then knowing I have to call Casey like as as scared as I am,
• 10:08
  like I hate that this is happening to birdie, But luckily
• 10:11
  she's the, you know, dogs. That's amazing thing.
• 10:13
  She they feel our energy and stuff, but she's just like, I'm
• 10:16
  so happy, like we're doing our normal things.
• 10:18
  They don't feel it. They don't get to like freak
• 10:21
  themselves out on the way to the appointments.
• 10:23
  Like that's all I so I'm so glad she doesn't have to take any of
• 10:27
  that like mental load on her. But I was just like, I'm like,
• 10:30
  how do I call him? And that was the thing that was
• 10:32
  this like, because like it's things like this that really get
• 10:36
  him like totally like freaked out and his anxiety gets so
• 10:41
  high. And I'm like, Oh my gosh, like
• 10:43
  how am I going to call him? How am I thinking like, do I
• 10:45
  wait till after my trip? Because this was before it was
• 10:47
  cancelled. And my dad was like, no, no, no,
• 10:49
  no. And I'm like, I know, I know.
• 10:51
  So I just had to like get my bearings.
• 10:53
  But one of the sweetest things, like literally once I start like
• 10:59
  calming down, like Eloise like came up to me and she's just
• 11:02
  like grabs my arm and just squeezes it.
• 11:05
  And I was like, oh, I'm like Eloise, can Kiki have a hug?
• 11:08
  And she gets on my lap and she gives me a hug.
• 11:10
  And she's not, she's not even 2. This is like how pure children
• 11:15
  at this age. And she looks at me and I know
• 11:18
  her mom, my sister, has been teaching her this when she's
• 11:21
  feeling overwhelmed. She looks at me and she takes a
• 11:24
  big. She goes to tell me to take a
• 11:28
  deep breath. And I was like, it was this.
• 11:31
  I know this. That gives me chills.
• 11:33
  I know. And I just like I was like,
• 11:35
  thank you. I'm like, I'm going to take a
• 11:36
  deep breath with you, honey. I just and then like that made
• 11:40
  me feel so much better. And then she comes back from the
• 11:43
  kitchen like she got down and then she comes back from the
• 11:45
  kitchen with a kitchen rag and goes for Kiki.
• 11:47
  For Kiki, you need to wipe my eyes.
• 11:51
  I'm like, I'm like, I need you around Anytime I'm feeling like
• 11:56
  I'm going to have a mental breakdown because it immediately
• 11:59
  made me feel like I wanted to cry again, but just from like
• 12:02
  pure, like love for her. So I'm like, you sweet soul.
• 12:07
  Yeah. And then she was going around.
• 12:09
  Regulator. Literally just big deep breath
• 12:11
  in front of me. And I'm like, yes, like I need
• 12:14
  to take a deep breath. Which then again, it's just a
• 12:16
  testament to like, how amazing. Like my sister and of course her
• 12:19
  husband too, but my sister's with her all day long as, yeah,
• 12:22
  you're going to take deep breaths and stuff like that when
• 12:24
  she's feeling overwhelmed. Yeah.
• 12:28
  But I have a value, guys. Like literally, I, I told, I
• 12:33
  called Casey. Obviously my family was there.
• 12:36
  And then you were the next person that I told because I'm
• 12:38
  just like, Oh my gosh. I, I mean, I feel for you.
• 12:43
  It's like it's hard when life kind of feels that way where
• 12:45
  it's like one thing after the other.
• 12:47
  And then I'm sure you're like, well, whenever I'm thinking like
• 12:50
  that, I'm always like, oh, but don't like, think this way.
• 12:54
  Like, try to think positive. But sometimes you just want to
• 12:56
  be like, this sucks. Like, why is this happening?
• 12:59
  Yeah. Totally.
• 13:00
  I definitely felt that like that day for sure.
• 13:03
  And then it's just so interesting because it's like,
• 13:06
  you know, like I think about it when I had like a drop off or
• 13:09
  something like I'm never gonna like no one knows what I have
• 13:12
  going on right now. And just like I don't know what
• 13:14
  anyone else has going on. So you know, like when people
• 13:16
  like, hey, how are you? And like, I'll be like, good.
• 13:20
  But like with you like on here, I'm like I, I can't, like I'm,
• 13:23
  it's so weird 'cause it's like 2 things can exist at the same
• 13:26
  time. Like I feel actually like, like
• 13:28
  even this weekend, we ended up having like a really nice
• 13:31
  weekend and like really good things, but still like a cloud
• 13:34
  that just feels like, Oh my gosh, like there and frustrating
• 13:38
  and annoying and just like why? But yeah, it's just like, I'm
• 13:44
  I'm not good, but I'm not bad. You know?
• 13:46
  It's just like you. How do you even answer that when
• 13:49
  people ask you and you just have, you know, again, everyone
• 13:52
  just has stuff going on, but just feels like one thing after
• 13:55
  another of like, and again, the trip stuff is so like minuscule,
• 13:59
  but it's still just like, why are things just like not working
• 14:03
  out? Like what is what is Maybe
• 14:05
  there's no lesson here, but I always try to think like, what
• 14:08
  is this lesson here? Like what am I?
• 14:10
  What is going on? And that can drive you crazy of
• 14:13
  just trying to think like maybe it's nothing.
• 14:15
  It's just like, I don't know, a fluke?
• 14:17
  Who knows, but dumb. I was thinking of you because I
• 14:23
  know how hard it is to also like, hold how you're feeling
• 14:26
  and hold someone else's feelings.
• 14:28
  Like just being in that kind of a team with Casey.
• 14:31
  And that's its own kind of challenge where it just adds a
• 14:35
  whole other layer of really loving someone so much and not
• 14:38
  wanting them to be upset and then also carrying those
• 14:41
  feelings yourself and. It's.
• 14:43
  A wild experience. Well, and that was why I like
• 14:45
  when I went for her first appointment just to get it
• 14:48
  looked at. I even told him like he was
• 14:49
  planning on going with me and stuff.
• 14:51
  And I just know that even just walking into any sort of, even
• 14:54
  though it's a vet office and not a doctor's office, like walking
• 14:57
  into any sort of environment like that, I, I, his whole mood
• 15:01
  shifts and it can affect our whole day.
• 15:03
  So I'm like, you know what, let me go and I'll, I'll do this.
• 15:08
  But then like once I got the news about birdie, like I was
• 15:10
  saying this and my sister and I told this to Casey too.
• 15:13
  So it's not like he would, you know, be offended to hear this
• 15:15
  or anything, but I was just like, you know, I, I try to
• 15:18
  protect him from all of this. Like I try to.
• 15:20
  And then Kristen, who's also been just a really awesome
• 15:23
  sounding board for Casey's last year of like she's just had more
• 15:28
  experience with mental health stuff than I personally have.
• 15:30
  So she's been just a really, they're just really close, which
• 15:33
  I love. And she said to me she's like,
• 15:36
  you know, at like some point, as much as you guys like you want
• 15:39
  to protect him, like he he needs to hear the information and take
• 15:44
  it and accept it as the adult that he is and he can feel what
• 15:48
  he needs to feel. But like you need the support
• 15:51
  just as much like you, you both went through this.
• 15:53
  Like this is not just a what happened to Casey.
• 15:57
  I just, you know, I obviously saw the overall fear for both of
• 16:02
  us, but especially for him being the one going through all of it.
• 16:05
  And I'm just like, I just want to like protect, you know, the
• 16:09
  people that I love as much as I can, but like, I need protecting
• 16:13
  too. Like I need I can't go through
• 16:15
  this by myself type of thing. And that's one thing that I've
• 16:18
  admired so much about y'all, is how open you are about that.
• 16:21
  And I think a lot of other people would probably hide that
• 16:23
  from each other or try to protect in that way where it's
• 16:26
  like I'm not feeling this way. And just like kind of like a
• 16:29
  strong front where I feel like y'all have just been so open
• 16:33
  about it. And I think that's a strength
• 16:35
  for sure. Yeah.
• 16:36
  But it's just, it's the stuff feels it's, it is really hard
• 16:40
  when you're trying to protect someone else and then also
• 16:43
  trying to take care of yourself. Totally.
• 16:45
  And when it's like one of those things too, that I feel like I
• 16:47
  am really good at regulating like my nervous system and how
• 16:50
  I'm feeling. And I know that Casey struggles
• 16:52
  with that more than I do. So then I feel like, well, I can
• 16:54
  take on more. But then, you know, with this
• 16:56
  kind of stuff where it's like it's happening to birdie versus
• 17:01
  like one of us, the humans, I'm like, you know what this is like
• 17:05
  we can do this together. Like this is not just a thing
• 17:08
  that you know, and that's the thing.
• 17:10
  It's like he would never expect that.
• 17:11
  That's me doing that. That's me trying to like take it
• 17:15
  all on by myself. But no, it was really helpful.
• 17:19
  Like even the day I told him like, you know, I wasn't with
• 17:22
  him. So I don't know how he was after
• 17:24
  the phone call, but I knew he actually needed to like collect
• 17:26
  himself just like I did. But he was right there with me
• 17:29
  of like, we're calling all the right people.
• 17:32
  You know, he's did all of the like ordering all the house type
• 17:34
  of test things that we want to do.
• 17:35
  So it was definitely like all hands on deck and then we were
• 17:39
  at her appointment together today and we'll be, you know,
• 17:42
  it's actually interesting because I'm like, and I, I had
• 17:45
  reached out to next week. I have a shadow program and
• 17:47
  starts on the day of her surgery.
• 17:49
  And I'm like, so I just reached out to them and I'm like, you
• 17:52
  know what, like in one person's traveling from Florida.
• 17:55
  So I know it's not like I can just like cancel.
• 17:59
  And so I was just like, you know, the starting day, like,
• 18:03
  part of my heart is not going to be with me.
• 18:04
  Like, and I'm probably gonna like, I, I know she's gonna be
• 18:08
  OK. Like, I just have to keep saying
• 18:10
  that. Like, we've got a plan.
• 18:11
  I trust the vet, you know, So, but I'm still gonna be like, oh,
• 18:16
  my God, my, like my brain's just gonna be elsewhere.
• 18:19
  So I had told them that. And just to be ahead of time,
• 18:22
  like, you know what? I'm human.
• 18:23
  I'm gonna still, you know, try to show you.
• 18:25
  But hey, this is gonna be a true day in the life because what's
• 18:28
  happening in my life right now is that and, you know, just like
• 18:31
  I, you know, things, it's just, it's weird, you know, things
• 18:36
  just like Hitch and you're just not expecting it and got to
• 18:39
  figure out how to live with it because, well.
• 18:42
  Especially when you are a dog trainer, like that is the thing.
• 18:45
  So many things come up that are have nothing to do with dog
• 18:48
  training, but it's still you have to carry it and figure out
• 18:51
  what to do with it when you have people and dogs to work with.
• 18:54
  And I love that you were so honest.
• 18:56
  Wow. Yeah, I know.
• 18:58
  So I could have just been like, hey guys, I'm like, I can on
• 19:03
  this one. I can on other things, but not
• 19:05
  on that, not on that one. No.
• 19:08
  Man, so that's what's going on in my world.
• 19:11
  You guys just, I was on a high high last time.
• 19:17
  The biggest thing that I was concerned about is you painting
• 19:19
  your toenails white this time. I wish I was still concerned
• 19:23
  about that Which? I have.
• 19:26
  So many opinions about that, OK. Did I?
• 19:28
  I did not tell you I wanted to save it for the podcast but I
• 19:31
  should have taken screenshots but I just deleted them 'cause
• 19:33
  they creeped me out. Made me feel so weird.
• 19:35
  But on Facebook, again, people wild on Facebook, I just want to
• 19:39
  boycott it. I, I just whatever.
• 19:40
  But on that I guess it shares to Facebook.
• 19:44
  Oh no. There were three comments.
• 19:47
  One of them was like, Oh my God, you're so boring.
• 19:50
  Like I hate white, grey and black stuff like choose a color.
• 19:54
  This is how I'm assuming that they're talking to me.
• 19:56
  I'm like you're. So boring they clearly don't
• 19:59
  know you're the least boring person.
• 20:02
  So and then. What colors you're wearing.
• 20:05
  I know I really want to get because I was watching an
• 20:07
  episode of A Great British Bake Off.
• 20:09
  I want to get some readers in bright pink like Crew.
• 20:13
  Yes, you need to. Yeah, I try not to be boring.
• 20:16
  But so then the other one was like, oh, that's such an elitist
• 20:19
  thing. Like getting a white nail Polish
• 20:23
  or something about like being an elitist.
• 20:24
  And I was like, really? I didn't even know.
• 20:28
  It would never even cross my mind.
• 20:30
  Literally never. I thought they were gonna come
• 20:32
  at me for being like, why do you have such opinions?
• 20:35
  It's like literally I don't have that kind of opinions about it.
• 20:38
  It just, I don't know, it just became a topic of our
• 20:41
  conversation. I.
• 20:43
  Was surprised how many people commented with their opinions to
• 20:45
  be honest. Yeah.
• 20:47
  I love I love the one comment I was like I hope this isn't
• 20:51
  creepy but like I love when my wife wears like white or light
• 20:53
  pink. I'm like not creepy at all.
• 20:55
  We. Like that, yeah.
• 20:57
  I love when like stuff is posted and someone that like never
• 21:01
  comments on anything that I've ever seen and then they comment
• 21:03
  on something like. Yes.
• 21:05
  The most random things and I'm like, how can we share more
• 21:08
  random things, which is basically what this podcast.
• 21:10
  Is I know I literally told Casey, I'm like, OK, so I know
• 21:13
  you're definitely not going to want to listen to the first half
• 21:15
  of the podcast because just things that you you already know
• 21:19
  what's going on And like, I'll let you know if we like come
• 21:22
  back from it and have anything funny because clearly those are
• 21:25
  the reals that people want to see is US talking about nothing
• 21:28
  that matters. Which same.
• 21:30
  Well, and I so I want to talk about TV for a second.
• 21:33
  Yes, but first, can you like, how are you?
• 21:34
  What's going on in your world? Oh, everything.
• 21:37
  I'm fine, I mean. I saw your post today.
• 21:41
  Well, I feel like maybe once or twice a year, I just want to,
• 21:45
  like, be obnoxiously honest about things on the Internet.
• 21:49
  Love that. Thank you.
• 21:51
  But because I love that you share on here because this feels
• 21:54
  intimate even though it's like people are gonna listen.
• 21:56
  It feels more intimate than Instagram.
• 22:00
  Yeah. Like yesterday I was feeling sad
• 22:02
  about my dad and saw someone walking who looked just like
• 22:05
  him. Which didn't make you want to
• 22:07
  get out of the car. No, Bobby asked me that.
• 22:09
  He was like, did you stop and talk to him?
• 22:10
  And I was like no like what am I see?
• 22:12
  I would. No, because then I would just
• 22:14
  think, oh, it's just going to ruin.
• 22:16
  He's not even making sure it's. Yeah, it's not going to be what
• 22:20
  you want from it. Yeah, not that I was like, happy
• 22:22
  that I was seeing someone that looked like my dad, but I also
• 22:25
  don't want to know this person's personality.
• 22:27
  No, no. Odds are he's not someone I'm
• 22:28
  ever going to want to talk to again, you know?
• 22:30
  There's no way he's as cool as your dad.
• 22:32
  No. So I was like, no, I would
• 22:34
  never. I was just what?
• 22:36
  What I. Like we.
• 22:37
  Were both asked what? I like we both asked that I know
• 22:41
  you both. Interesting, similar things,
• 22:42
  sometimes just odd, but yeah. So yeah, I was in my feelings
• 22:47
  about that and I, I don't know, I think gems are are like a
• 22:51
  coping mechanism or crystals. For you what?
• 22:54
  Yeah. So I, I don't know in general
• 22:56
  maybe like the feeling of it because I don't know what it
• 22:58
  means. I looked it up one time on
• 23:01
  ChatGPT and I totally forgot but.
• 23:03
  It's still like the. The feel of it, it's like AI
• 23:07
  feel like in my mind this is what I think.
• 23:10
  I want all of my sad thoughts to go into the crystal.
• 23:13
  I love that. OK, so.
• 23:15
  Well, you're thinking it, so it probably is.
• 23:18
  We kind of, I like to believe it is.
• 23:19
  Yeah, I. Need like 17 crystals in each
• 23:22
  hand right now. Need.
• 23:24
  To get. I need some sage and crystals in
• 23:27
  this house. You you guys come here in August
• 23:30
  and I just have an entire shelving of crystals everywhere.
• 23:35
  Oh my God, we need to do that before the trainer.
• 23:38
  You walk around saging the whole place.
• 23:40
  Totally, yes, Oh my gosh. But I'm so like just a what?
• 23:46
  So you're good, you're good. You're no a bit of all of it.
• 23:51
  Well, I just one thing that really helps me whenever I'm
• 23:53
  feeling like anxious or down is watching ATV show that comforts
• 23:57
  me. So I watched a show called Julia
• 24:00
  on HBO. It's about Julia Child.
• 24:04
  Julia Child. Oh but it's so good they stopped
• 24:06
  after two seasons, which was so upsetting.
• 24:08
  So I just watched the same same two seasons over and over.
• 24:11
  Because why not? Yeah, but it's just the whole
• 24:13
  feel of it makes me feel so much better.
• 24:15
  Good. I'm.
• 24:16
  Glad you have that comfort show. Yeah.
• 24:18
  So no, I'm good, but OK, Well, there are a few shows I want to
• 24:22
  talk about. First of all, I have that the
• 24:24
  love on the spectrum I have not finished.
• 24:27
  OK, where are you at? I am at my new favorite person
• 24:31
  on that show, Logan. OK, this is hilarious to me.
• 24:36
  That's Casey's new favorite person too.
• 24:38
  And I like him, but I have a little bit of and Casey's like
• 24:42
  he's like, no, I like literally align with him.
• 24:44
  He's like I, I feel like some of the things that he feels, I'm
• 24:48
  like really where with me he gives me a little bit of anxiety
• 24:51
  because really James clearly gives me anxiety like for.
• 24:55
  Sure. I couldn't watch it yesterday
• 24:56
  because I was feeling anxious and I was like this is just
• 24:58
  going to be more. Anxious I shouldn't, I shouldn't
• 24:59
  imitate him. Oh my gosh, what am I doing but
• 25:01
  like. People will know and yeah.
• 25:03
  It is it's in like love him. You know, I know he can't help
• 25:08
  that, but I literally have to take that in doses.
• 25:11
  Logan I really do like and I think that like his realness of
• 25:15
  his like the first date. Did you get to that one where
• 25:18
  just. About to show up.
• 25:20
  Oh my gosh, OK you need to for next week.
• 25:22
  I've literally re watched the season now twice because I
• 25:25
  watched it. Yes it's only 7 episodes so you
• 25:29
  need to do some binge watching of it because there's so much I
• 25:32
  want to talk about on it because Oh my gosh.
• 25:34
  Even though some of it gives me anxiety, it right now has
• 25:37
  definitely been a comfort show. And I love, I do love Logan, but
• 25:41
  I love Madison, love her so much.
• 25:43
  And then Connor, I mean, oh, he's my tried and true.
• 25:47
  He's the one in like, Atlanta, right?
• 25:49
  Yeah, how he, like, literally, you didn't get to the episode
• 25:51
  yet that his dad's coming just to have like, have tea with him,
• 25:54
  right. No.
• 25:55
  OK, make sure you notice as his. Dad.
• 25:58
  Yeah, as his dad arrives, he's pulling out a fake sword 2
• 26:04
  times. He just like does his whole
• 26:06
  like, I'm pulling out my sword and it's just I can't.
• 26:10
  And then his dog gets out and he's running.
• 26:12
  He's like, oh Coco, I do not have time for this.
• 26:17
  I love it so so much. It is so pure.
• 26:20
  Please watch it and we just we could do an entire episode just
• 26:24
  on shows don't. Think that is that's basically a
• 26:28
  dream of mine come true if we do, which we should.
• 26:30
  Yes. OK, So what else are you
• 26:32
  watching? I have not watched the NY
• 26:34
  whatever one that you told me about yet on Netflix.
• 26:37
  The murder mystery ones. Don't watch that right now.
• 26:39
  I feel like that's anxiety inducing for sure.
• 26:42
  Well, we are watching a different one, but tell me what
• 26:44
  you're watching and then I'll tell.
• 26:45
  You about the one once you once you mentioned jury duty.
• 26:47
  Yes. We went back and rewatched the
• 26:49
  first season. Hilarious.
• 26:51
  I forgot how. Hilarious.
• 26:53
  I did too. It is.
• 26:55
  How much do you love Ronald? Like.
• 26:58
  He's. Just wait.
• 26:59
  Which one's Ronald? Ronald's the only one that
• 27:01
  doesn't know what's going on and.
• 27:03
  He's the one that they're playing it on.
• 27:04
  Yes, he's just a nice guy. Like one of the parts when him
• 27:08
  and James are like practicing that scene because he's trying
• 27:12
  to, you know, help him prepare for his audition.
• 27:16
  Yes, the actual actor and Ronald is just like James is telling
• 27:21
  him like a little bit more like gruffy and stuff.
• 27:23
  And then Ronald's like like really trying.
• 27:27
  And I'm like, this poor guy is just.
• 27:30
  He's so sweet. So sweet.
• 27:32
  So thoughtful. And like the girl that just like
• 27:35
  standing there with her bikini top in the hotel and he's just
• 27:38
  like not saying anything about it and he's just keeping a
• 27:42
  straight face. I'm like, bless this man.
• 27:44
  He is just a St. because I'd be like, what's going on?
• 27:50
  What's happening? Why?
• 27:51
  He's just like talking to her naturally.
• 27:53
  Normally I'd be like, I can't look at anything else right now.
• 27:57
  Well, in the part where because there's things where like what
• 27:59
  if he would have said yes to like going and jumping on the
• 28:02
  bed? The only.
• 28:06
  Way they can do it is if someone else is providing the momentum.
• 28:09
  That is wild. Good point.
• 28:11
  I didn't even think of that. I mean, they would have done it.
• 28:15
  I know we we started it. So it's different.
• 28:18
  Are you seeing the vibe? It's like it's, it's a little
• 28:21
  bit more like if you've ever seen the office, it's more like
• 28:23
  that. It almost feels like whoa, this
• 28:26
  is too not real or like. Yeah, so Steph and AJ watched it
• 28:32
  and they I think that they I can't totally tell.
• 28:34
  They like both a lot. I almost feel like they like the
• 28:37
  second one better. And from the my first
• 28:39
  impression, I feel like I'm not going to like it as much as jury
• 28:42
  duty because it almost seems so much like a production.
• 28:47
  Yes. Like how does it feel like even
• 28:49
  just the Dougie guy? I'm like, how would he even be
• 28:52
  real and how would he be passed off to the company?
• 28:55
  Like that's as far as we've gotten is I think like they just
• 28:58
  arrived at the what do they call it?
• 29:01
  Not the getaway, but the I don't know the thing that they're
• 29:04
  going to where they're staying for the.
• 29:05
  Retreat. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 29:07
  Oh yeah. So it's totally did you?
• 29:08
  Guys watch the whole thing Oh yeah OK to be determined of how
• 29:12
  we because. There were somewhere it felt
• 29:13
  like kind of a little more boring to me.
• 29:17
  Some parts where jury duty, I feel like it was just
• 29:20
  constantly, I don't know if it was the setup or the character
• 29:23
  like the one and this is something I forgot.
• 29:26
  I I love when there's like moments where I literally, I
• 29:29
  mean, I laugh a lot, but where I am like can't breathe laughing.
• 29:32
  Yes. And it's the one where they go
• 29:34
  upstairs and there's the mannequins.
• 29:37
  That's when Casey was literally laughing out loud during.
• 29:41
  That one little guy is like standing there.
• 29:43
  I love him, I love him. And get so scared, Oh my gosh.
• 29:48
  And then also I love like, I, I think the humor of stuff like
• 29:51
  the old lady falling asleep on and, and he's just like, like
• 29:56
  wake up. Like I love that kind of stuff
• 29:58
  because that to me is like, that would really happen.
• 30:00
  Yeah, I could see that being. And he's like in charge of the
• 30:03
  jury because he's the whatever they call it.
• 30:06
  God, it's so funny. For men.
• 30:08
  Oh, and then like when the guy, it's almost on the lines of like
• 30:12
  when someone almost throws up. It's almost that kind of funny
• 30:14
  to me. Not really.
• 30:15
  I love that. I love that so much.
• 30:17
  But when the guy gets fake drunk and so he comes in, he's all
• 30:21
  dishevelled and he's really good at acting it.
• 30:23
  Really good. Yeah, that one.
• 30:25
  There's a couple of things that I'm like, I would not believe
• 30:27
  that. Like the guy coming in with the
• 30:29
  crutches as a chair, like as funny as I find him.
• 30:32
  I just don't think that I would. I would.
• 30:34
  Maybe I would. I don't know, like if ever.
• 30:39
  Yeah, Would it ever be? I would never think.
• 30:41
  Now that I've seen this show, I would.
• 30:42
  But if you've never seen a show like it, I would never think
• 30:44
  like what is going on? Like where's the production?
• 30:47
  No, I would think like something's I would think
• 30:51
  something's bizarre, but I don't know that I would necessarily
• 30:53
  think like this is an actor. I'd be kind of thinking like,
• 30:55
  how did he pass to get on jury duty?
• 30:59
  Like what is going on? But yeah, it was so funny.
• 31:04
  Another show we're watching right now, which is not funny,
• 31:06
  but it's still very like, I like it A lot, is Cross on on Amazon
• 31:14
  Prime. It's a detective show they're
• 31:18
  trying to solve basically a serial killer.
• 31:21
  And so I'm actually surprised Casey's really into it as well.
• 31:24
  But when I was watching it, I'm like, oh, I think Bethany and
• 31:27
  Bobby would both really like this 10.
• 31:29
  My gosh, I can't believe I haven't seen.
• 31:30
  It Yeah, so the episodes are like an hour long.
• 31:33
  I think it's just one season so far and we're not totally
• 31:38
  through. Hold on.
• 31:39
  Hey, Case, can you? I'm sorry, but like, he's making
• 31:43
  lunch stings so loud behind me. Like all I can take is him in
• 31:48
  the background and he's like pouring out cheese.
• 31:52
  We've got crinkling and crackling.
• 31:54
  I'm so distracted like if this and I can't.
• 31:57
  Hear anything but I know you. Can't.
• 31:59
  Oh my gosh, it's like a dog licking themselves right now.
• 32:03
  All I hear is like everything. But if he was recording his
• 32:06
  podcast right now, he'd be Which?
• 32:09
  Wouldn't get annoyed. He he recorded his first ever
• 32:13
  episode on his podcast. He has not shared about it yet.
• 32:17
  Bethany, you're gonna love it. It is so random and so out
• 32:21
  there. You should have seen.
• 32:24
  I'm totally OK. So watch cross.
• 32:26
  But this first. He sends it to me while I was
• 32:29
  still visiting with my sister and niece.
• 32:31
  His cover photo that he was doing for his podcast, the title
• 32:35
  of it if anyone wants to look it up, is your Weirdest Friend,
• 32:39
  which is. So perfect.
• 32:41
  So perfect but he sends me the cover photo and I'm like what in
• 32:46
  the AI is this? It is like a picture of him that
• 32:49
  kind of looks like him but not fully.
• 32:52
  Like the beard was bearding and it almost looked like he kind of
• 32:54
  had like a weird mustache but he was like shirtless but only up
• 32:58
  to here. But I know what picture he sent
• 33:00
  them to use and there's like rubber duckies around him, 8
• 33:05
  balls. The worst part of it that he
• 33:07
  didn't even notice. That's where it's like, you
• 33:10
  know, if you're going to like use something as your podcast
• 33:13
  cover, you're going to analyze all of it, right?
• 33:15
  Like, do I like the colors? Do I like everything that's on
• 33:17
  it? He just went with like first
• 33:19
  impression perfect, put it out there.
• 33:22
  I literally sent to him. There's like a tarot card next
• 33:24
  to him and it says death on it. And I'm like Casey, I, I can't,
• 33:31
  I can't get on board with the death card next to you.
• 33:33
  And he's like, Oh my God, I didn't even notice that.
• 33:35
  So then I'm think he's like, get that down, get that down.
• 33:38
  I don't want this voodoo around me.
• 33:39
  And I'm like, dude. So we, we've he's adjusted his
• 33:44
  cover photo thing 'cause I should have screenshotted what
• 33:47
  it used to look like so you could see it.
• 33:49
  Maybe you still, I'm sure you. Still have that.
• 33:51
  So it's like it's like up right now.
• 33:53
  Yeah. So I will find, Yeah.
• 33:57
  So do it on Spotify. Yeah.
• 34:01
  Your weirdest friend. It is very, very him.
• 34:07
  OK, so now it's just he's just in the wilderness.
• 34:10
  Yep, that's and just standing there with like his mouth half
• 34:13
  open in those boots. Is he bottomless?
• 34:16
  No, he's got shorts on. The words are.
• 34:19
  Just going I can only see it this far away so.
• 34:21
  Yeah, I will find. I'm sure he still has it.
• 34:24
  I will send you what it used to look like.
• 34:26
  You're going to be like what? And it looks like.
• 34:30
  OK, so how I would have explained is it almost looks
• 34:32
  like there's like jukeboxes behind him or it looks like a
• 34:36
  run. It looks like a like a rundown
• 34:39
  laundry mat or something. I don't I don't know.
• 34:42
  And it just gives off vibes that he's like this hardcore partier
• 34:44
  or something. And I'm like furthest thing from
• 34:47
  it. So this one is much more him,
• 34:49
  just like standing there with his shirts and boots on in the
• 34:52
  wilderness makes much more sense with his mouth kind of hanging
• 34:55
  open. OK, but yes please send me the
• 34:57
  other one. Yeah, I will just figure I love
• 35:00
  it. Yeah.
• 35:01
  Context. Yes, you definitely need that.
• 35:03
  Oh my gosh. OK.
• 35:04
  I'm very excited. Oh yeah.
• 35:07
  It's like there's no rhyme or reason to what he's talking
• 35:11
  about. He's talking by himself.
• 35:13
  There's TV going on in the background.
• 35:16
  I'm like, I'm distracted just listening to this.
• 35:19
  He has like a weatherman on while he's recording a podcast.
• 35:24
  That's how it should be. Honestly true.
• 35:26
  That is exactly how it should be.
• 35:27
  Just like letting it flow with like whatever random things are.
• 35:30
  Behind, well, he says about 3 or 4 times on it.
• 35:32
  He's like, this is just a stream of consciousness while I'm on
• 35:35
  here. It's just whatever comes to my
• 35:36
  mind is coming out of my mouth. I'm like perfect.
• 35:40
  Perfect. Oh my God.
• 35:43
  It's kind of like a If you guys are wondering what's going on in
• 35:46
  his brain 24/7, you're going to get an inside book.
• 35:49
  But I. Love it.
• 35:53
  He really did it because he said he's going to when you're not
• 35:56
  there. Yeah, he did it while I was not
• 35:58
  there, so it was perfect. Amazing, man.
• 36:01
  Yeah, it's good, Yeah. Are you watching anything else?
• 36:08
  No. What did we?
• 36:10
  Well, Bobby really likes. We've watched it before, so this
• 36:13
  is where we're at now. We're great with Queen.
• 36:15
  What? Not Queen.
• 36:15
  What is it? Cross.
• 36:18
  Yeah. What do you mean you're great
• 36:19
  with it? Well, have you heard about it?
• 36:22
  No. What did I say?
• 36:23
  I don't know. You said we're great with Queen,
• 36:25
  I mean cross, so I don't know what that means.
• 36:28
  Well now that I know that there's a new show out there
• 36:30
  that we need to watch, we were re watching.
• 36:32
  It's called Jack Ryan on Prime. Oh yeah, it's like we watch that
• 36:36
  as well. Oh, OK.
• 36:37
  I think it's a it's a good put it on show, but like it's fine.
• 36:43
  If you miss a couples like episode you be like I can catch
• 36:46
  up. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 36:47
  This one that we're watching cross, like you have to pay
• 36:50
  attention. I will say my opinion on it is
• 36:53
  it is very what's what's the word I'm looking for?
• 36:58
  Like you're gonna be able to guess what's gonna happen.
• 37:00
  What's that word? It's very predictable.
• 37:05
  Predictable. Yeah, but I don't mind that.
• 37:08
  I love being able to, like, solve a mystery.
• 37:10
  I don't know, maybe I think it's just predictable.
• 37:11
  Maybe Casey didn't. But like, I literally can call
• 37:14
  it before it's happening what's going to happen.
• 37:16
  But I like that kind of stuff. You do.
• 37:18
  Yeah. Did you ever watch the show?
• 37:21
  It's on Netflix with, you know, Claire Danes.
• 37:26
  It sounds super familiar but I can't put a name do.
• 37:29
  You know the show Homeland? Oh, see, I have watched so much
• 37:32
  TV that I swear to God I've watched everything.
• 37:34
  Yeah. I know the show never watched
• 37:36
  Homeland. Do you remember what the lady
• 37:38
  is? Oh, see, that's OK.
• 37:40
  Honestly, I don't. I forget to say yes, but I'd be
• 37:42
  lying. I think you don't have to lie.
• 37:46
  I think the monster in me, I think you mentioned it.
• 37:50
  Oh yeah, I watch Monster in me. She, she's in that.
• 37:53
  Yeah, she's like the writer. She's worrying about the guy who
• 37:57
  possibly. Killed.
• 37:58
  Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. I know exactly who you're
• 38:00
  talking about. OK, see, I love a show like that
• 38:02
  where it's like you have no idea what's going on.
• 38:05
  Totally. Oh, there is another good show.
• 38:06
  Oh my God. OK, It's really going to turn
• 38:08
  into ATV show podcast. It's like not 3 Best Friends or
• 38:14
  something. It's on Apple with three really
• 38:17
  good actresses. But that's a really good crime
• 38:20
  drama. That's Arpetta.
• 38:23
  No, that's on Prime. Oh, OK.
• 38:26
  Did you watch that? I've heard not great things
• 38:29
  about it. And like the cast is like bomb.
• 38:34
  Literally. There's never been something
• 38:36
  that she's been in that I'm not like, yes, 10 out of 10, like.
• 38:40
  Did you ever see Big Little Lies?
• 38:41
  Yes. OK, this show on Apple is kind
• 38:44
  of similar vibes. OK, so I'll have to tell you
• 38:46
  what the name is, but yeah, I love that show.
• 38:50
  Do you guys this is nothing to do with shows?
• 38:52
  Do you guys have, I don't think you do have bird feeders.
• 38:55
  We did, and then squirrels made it an insane situation.
• 38:59
  Oh. And then and.
• 39:01
  Then our dogs started getting diarrhea.
• 39:03
  Oh no, what do you? Mean the bird seed and so
• 39:06
  Charlie would take some shit everywhere.
• 39:08
  So it was like. Weird your dogs would eat bird
• 39:10
  seed. Oh, go to town, you know Charlie
• 39:13
  was you had just get some for worms.
• 39:16
  Literally, we walked past. We were in Blaine's farm and
• 39:18
  fleet the other day. We walked past a bag of worms.
• 39:20
  We're like, we should get these for Charlie and send them to
• 39:23
  him. Well, that was something this
• 39:26
  weekend that we did that made us happy is we got a Hummingbird
• 39:30
  feeder, another bird feeder. It's not the hummingbirds have
• 39:35
  not found it yet. I mean, I just put it out
• 39:36
  yesterday, but I made the sugar water to go in it.
• 39:39
  That's something you could do 'cause it's not seed.
• 39:42
  Sugar water. Yeah, and do a Hummingbird
• 39:44
  feeder. OK, 'cause I, it's so funny
• 39:47
  you'd say that, 'cause I was looking today, I was bricked out
• 39:50
  on my phone when we were working out and I was like, what am I
• 39:52
  going to? I want to look at my phone at
• 39:54
  something. So I was looking at pictures and
• 39:55
  I was like, what are they doing last year at this time?
• 39:57
  And I went back and looked at pictures and some of them were
• 40:00
  of the garden and we put the bird feeder out and there were
• 40:05
  birds. I mean, a bird landed in our, a
• 40:09
  Bluebird landed in our. Water not water feeder.
• 40:13
  What is it? The Yeah, the bird bath.
• 40:15
  Bird bath, Yeah. Took a bath in it.
• 40:17
  I could watch that. I swear to God I'm going to be
• 40:19
  like a bird. Water.
• 40:20
  Bird bath is now like sitting by your rusty table.
• 40:24
  Do you fill it up with fresh water?
• 40:25
  Becoming one. Oh yeah, I do.
• 40:27
  I'm good about that. Well, I wasn't for months and
• 40:29
  months, but now I am. You're like I am now.
• 40:32
  Did you order that new table? No, not yet, because Bobby was.
• 40:37
  Measuring. Yeah, and it is a little longer.
• 40:40
  OK. The only thing is when we go out
• 40:42
  of town, because I'm literally, which is fine.
• 40:44
  Like it is a good habit to get into of cleaning something
• 40:48
  daily. So I was, I'm wiping it down.
• 40:50
  I have a little towel out there. But then when we're out of town,
• 40:53
  if I come back and it's like so insanely dusty, it's going to
• 40:56
  bother me, I think. So this is my thought process.
• 41:00
  So yeah, I need to get the. Other one and it's I not totally
• 41:03
  surprised that you sent me a picture that it had like some
• 41:06
  water damage just because it's like technically that was an
• 41:08
  inside table that we got for that so.
• 41:12
  And that's not from drinks. I am using the coasters.
• 41:14
  Very. So that's just from being in a
• 41:16
  humid space, living in Florida, being outside and.
• 41:19
  Coming in and watering the ferns and it.
• 41:21
  Totally water falling on. The table and then Bobby's
• 41:25
  following me like don't get this we need to move the table so
• 41:29
  that the water doesn't get on and I'm like Oh my God, I know
• 41:31
  Bobby said that yeah, he didn't say it like that I'd.
• 41:33
  Be I know, but go Bobby caring about the table I'm here for.
• 41:37
  That OK, but then I shouldn't call him out for that's.
• 41:42
  Call him out, I do. Love him so much.
• 41:45
  I love my husband. Obviously he has a a a bench.
• 41:51
  I don't know. If he has a workout, bench a
• 41:53
  workout. Bench.
• 41:54
  Oh, that third one that's still around.
• 41:57
  It has been in this would make you insane.
• 42:00
  I have been so good. I really have.
• 42:01
  I mean, I'm constantly now noticing how cluttery things and
• 42:04
  I'm like, why did I why has this been here for three days?
• 42:06
  I'm not saying that to myself, but that it's collecting pollen.
• 42:11
  It's turning yellow on the top. It's in the driveway.
• 42:14
  It's almost hard to get out of the car.
• 42:16
  Why? Don't you guys just put it out
• 42:17
  front and write free on it? I I said that to Bobby and he
• 42:20
  was like, I don't want the lady down the street to get it.
• 42:23
  Why? She's at the gym, yes, who's a
• 42:27
  little bit not nice. She just doesn't seem like not
• 42:30
  the nicest to us. He.
• 42:31
  Doesn't want her to have it, he said.
• 42:33
  That. That's hilarious, I love it so
• 42:39
  much. I love a petty Bobby.
• 42:40
  Who knew? Who knew he was petty?
• 42:44
  AFI don't. Want to get it?
• 42:47
  I, I feel like it's a little bit of a like excuse for sure, just
• 42:52
  because he has some people in his family that are hoarders.
• 42:57
  Uh huh. And I think he's a little
• 42:59
  nervous that it's in his chair he fall.
• 43:01
  Far from the tree. And so I'm like, fine.
• 43:06
  So I actually, I've been inching it closer and closer and one
• 43:11
  time I inched it close to the door where he has to get into
• 43:13
  the car. Bobby uh oh.
• 43:15
  I ran the Tesla into it and it's like he's going to want to move
• 43:18
  it then if it's going to Ding his car.
• 43:20
  No, he'll, it will be. That would be my fault.
• 43:22
  Like what? What is it behind the car?
• 43:24
  What? Why did you veer to the left?
• 43:27
  I don't know. So he even now parks closer to
• 43:29
  the right so that I can hang out on the left.
• 43:32
  I'm telling you. Yeah.
• 43:34
  Bobby, you're being called out. So now if you're listening to
• 43:37
  this, you're going to have to get rid of the punch.
• 43:40
  Well, it started back on the pool deck and then it migrated
• 43:45
  to the gym again and. We actually had more people and
• 43:49
  it was like, Oh yeah, we could use this extra 1.
• 43:52
  Totally not 100% necessary, but we did, yeah.
• 43:55
  Now it's just been out there for as long as you have been gone.
• 43:58
  Well, you're just going to have to wipe it off, clean it up and
• 44:01
  bring it with you guys in August and we'll take it.
• 44:05
  There. You go.
• 44:05
  Can you imagine moving or literally traveling here with a
• 44:08
  bench? I swear.
• 44:10
  Actually we've done weirder things.
• 44:13
  We travelled in our van, not this last time, at the time
• 44:16
  before with those fold down chairs for the trainer, you
• 44:21
  know, So it wouldn't be that weird.
• 44:23
  Well this is ridiculous, it should not be here still in
• 44:26
  August and travelling with US cross country because probably
• 44:31
  would have much rather people he knows and really likes to have
• 44:33
  it than some random lady. Oh my God, that's so good and.
• 44:37
  I don't even want to say Can you imagine, because I know it's
• 44:39
  going to. Happen.
• 44:39
  Yes, you're like, I can't imagine.
• 44:42
  Oh my gosh, that's too funny. You.
• 44:45
  Know what's funny about the? I'd be curious if Casey thinks
• 44:48
  this too because just because of what you said about Logan.
• 44:52
  But whenever I watch Love on the spectrum, to me, it almost makes
• 44:57
  me want to be even more. I don't want to say odd, but
• 45:04
  like more authentically, like, you know, the parts of yourself
• 45:07
  where you try to hide or you try to like minimize because yes,
• 45:10
  unless you're really. Like I probably shouldn't say
• 45:11
  this out loud, and it's not even from a reason of like it being
• 45:14
  like politically correct or anything like that.
• 45:16
  It's just like, it's weird. Yes, I think that's where part
• 45:19
  of my post today came from, just being like just rebelling
• 45:22
  against, Yeah. You're just like, put it out
• 45:24
  there. Yes, so that is the sound that
• 45:27
  should come with a post like that.
• 45:30
  So yeah, that's what it makes me feel like when I watch it.
• 45:33
  It makes me a little anxious. Like when is it not Connor?
• 45:37
  Who's the blonde one? The long hair?
• 45:41
  James. James when he's at the kitchen
• 45:43
  table with his new girlfriend and with.
• 45:47
  His parents there too. Yes.
• 45:49
  And then when he gets up to go find, and I love that you can
• 45:52
  hear how he's talking to himself when he goes to find the poem.
• 45:55
  And, like, the mom and dad are like, you can tell 'cause the
• 45:58
  girl's really quiet, too. And they're like, so what's the
• 46:00
  weather like outside? And I was like, oh, wow, that's
• 46:03
  the line you use when you're like, I don't know what to say.
• 46:06
  Yeah. Literally, literally.
• 46:09
  Oh yeah. And doesn't Bobby like have a
• 46:12
  little bit of a hard time watching it?
• 46:13
  Was that Bobby then? Yeah, yes.
• 46:15
  He doesn't like awkward things. It makes him feel awkward.
• 46:18
  Go figure. Yeah, doesn't.
• 46:19
  Like I love it so much. I do too.
• 46:23
  I just find myself like I I think it's like a Madison is a
• 46:26
  great example of like she is so authentically her and I love her
• 46:31
  little crinkly nose smile. She's just precious and it makes
• 46:37
  me want to just like I want to be friends with her.
• 46:39
  I love obviously Abby. She's not as they're not in that
• 46:43
  this season as much, but they are near the end in like the
• 46:45
  last episode. They're just amazing humans.
• 46:49
  And I totally know what you're saying.
• 46:52
  And that's literally, I feel like sometimes with Casey is
• 46:55
  he'll say things that like some people just don't get.
• 46:58
  And but like, I appreciate that he doesn't feel like, like it
• 47:02
  came to his mind. He wanted to say it.
• 47:03
  So he says it. Yeah.
• 47:04
  Which I think is great. And I get it 'cause I'm just
• 47:07
  like, so used to it. And like, he very much is like
• 47:10
  that with you guys. And I think that's why he also,
• 47:12
  it comes out even stronger on you is you're such a good
• 47:15
  audience. Like you laugh at everything he
• 47:17
  says and he loves the reaction. I'm not just thinking about
• 47:21
  what? He's talking about literally and
• 47:22
  then sometimes it just does not land with other people, like
• 47:25
  very logical people that are taking or very literal people.
• 47:29
  Oh, it goes over their head. Really hilarious to me because I
• 47:32
  know it's just like randomness coming out of his brain right
• 47:36
  now and then it just comes out of his mouth.
• 47:38
  But I'll have, I've seen people try to respond to something that
• 47:42
  it's like he wasn't actually looking for a response, he was
• 47:45
  just looking for a reaction. And I'm like, Oh no, they
• 47:48
  thought he was like really serious.
• 47:49
  And I can't even think of a good example.
• 47:51
  But yeah, I very much feel like Casey says whatever comes to his
• 47:56
  mind once in a while, he'll probably filter it a little bit,
• 47:59
  but not much. So good.
• 48:03
  I love that. I think I, that's so telling
• 48:06
  too, that like when you watch that you really, but you like
• 48:09
  them so much and you want to be around them because I think it,
• 48:12
  I mean, I never feel this way with you, but there are some
• 48:15
  people when you're around them. It's like my mother and
• 48:17
  father-in-law came over. They will never listen to this
• 48:20
  podcast, which by the way, I'm going to really work on not
• 48:22
  sharing so many things when I'm feeling it in the moment.
• 48:24
  PS That's just a byline from the last episode, but they came over
• 48:30
  and it, it feels kind of like not authentic.
• 48:33
  And I'm so I, I've been trying to figure this out where I am so
• 48:37
  judgy. And I think it's probably
• 48:41
  something like that, you know, like the thing when you're
• 48:43
  annoyed and somewhat not and something and someone else, it's
• 48:45
  really a reflection of what you're annoyed at and yourself.
• 48:48
  So I've been trying to think about this cuz it helps.
• 48:51
  Me or like are you saying you feel super judging with them?
• 48:56
  Yeah, well, cuz like one thing, I'm standing talking to their
• 48:59
  parents, his parents and his mom is closest to me, but I can tell
• 49:05
  she wants Bobby to be included in whatever the conversation is.
• 49:09
  So she'll almost start talking to me and then kind of stop and
• 49:11
  like wait for Bobby to look her way or something.
• 49:16
  Yeah. And to me, it's all my
• 49:18
  insecurities about someone, not like caring about what I say or
• 49:22
  like wanting to talk with, I don't know.
• 49:24
  So then I I said something because Charlie walked past her
• 49:28
  and she was like, how's Charlie? And I was like, Oh, did Bobby
• 49:32
  tell you how we thought we were going to have to put him down
• 49:35
  because he was acting so weird? And she kind of acted flippant,
• 49:37
  like, oh, no, like I don't remember him saying that.
• 49:41
  And I'm like, what? Like what?
• 49:43
  You don't remember? So I it's those little things
• 49:46
  where it's like, I think I'm also, I don't ever really ask
• 49:51
  about the personal things in her life.
• 49:55
  So why? I don't know so.
• 49:58
  I just also this is just my personal opinion and but also
• 50:02
  like they're still the parents and like I know you guys are
• 50:05
  adults, but like I don't know. I just feel like my, like my
• 50:11
  parents or like if I had children, I would, regardless
• 50:15
  about how old they get, I would want to know anything they want
• 50:19
  to share with me about their life.
• 50:20
  And I know that like my parents very much feel that way.
• 50:23
  And like if we're hurting, they're hurting type of thing.
• 50:26
  And you know, everyone's just so different too.
• 50:28
  So it's like I, I do see what you're saying.
• 50:31
  And I, the reason I'm just like, I very much relate to this is I
• 50:36
  feel like yes, it can be a reflection of something that you
• 50:40
  are dealing with, but you're also, or like that you've, you
• 50:42
  know, felt self-conscious about in the past.
• 50:44
  But also I just feel super strongly that we're just allowed
• 50:47
  to feel how we feel. And like, it could just be like,
• 50:50
  this is just how I feel in this moment.
• 50:52
  And they, you know, there might be, there probably is no ill
• 50:56
  will whatsoever, but it's still allowed to hurt your feelings.
• 51:00
  And that's what I've had to learn like through, you know,
• 51:02
  similar situations. It's just like I'm still allowed
• 51:05
  to feel hurt, like, but even if there was nothing intentional,
• 51:10
  you know, whatsoever, because the Charlie thing was still such
• 51:14
  a huge thing for you guys in such a big momentum or momentous
• 51:18
  moment where it's like, it could have been like that would have
• 51:21
  just shifted everything for you guys.
• 51:22
  And obviously right now it ended up in the good way.
• 51:25
  But like, you know, that still was really hard.
• 51:28
  And it's like, yeah, it's not flimping to you guys.
• 51:31
  Yeah. Well, and you're so right,
• 51:32
  because I think a lot of times the instinct is to validate why
• 51:36
  or like, oh, that hurt my feelings, but they probably
• 51:39
  didn't mean anything by it, where it's OK to just be like,
• 51:42
  no, that that hurt me like, and it started that's what started
• 51:45
  me like thinking about my dad and missing him because I think
• 51:49
  like your parents, he was very much wanted to hear everything
• 51:53
  about our life. He was very interested in Bobby
• 51:55
  and I don't, I don't really get that from his parents.
• 51:59
  And they have tried in their own way.
• 52:01
  And again, it's taught me so much about everyone tries to
• 52:05
  help in different ways or not everyone communicates the same
• 52:08
  so. Yeah, it's one of those things
• 52:11
  that I think it's like learning to not expect things.
• 52:14
  Like I, I feel like I've really done a much better job of this.
• 52:18
  But I definitely think I used to in the past, like expect someone
• 52:22
  to treat me or like to engage with something in the same way
• 52:25
  that I would try for them. And it's like, that's not always
• 52:28
  going to be the case. Like even with what we have
• 52:31
  going on right now, like someone I would expect to hear from
• 52:33
  about hearing about birdie, I've heard nothing.
• 52:36
  And it's like like someone very close to us that should have
• 52:41
  like reached out to me and been like, you know, I'm just
• 52:44
  thinking about you guys. But then we're get I'm getting
• 52:46
  tons of like texts about their travels and I'm like.
• 52:49
  Oh yeah. OK, like I'm sorry right now
• 52:53
  that like I don't care about that.
• 52:55
  Like I can't even get a text of like, you know, that kind of
• 52:58
  news. And that's where it's like I'm
• 52:59
  putting an expectation where I have to like manage my
• 53:01
  expectations of like, again, I'm sure there's zero ill will.
• 53:05
  Probably not even like the assumption is of course we're
• 53:08
  thinking of you. Of course we're thinking of
• 53:09
  birdie. But to me, I'm like, my gosh,
• 53:14
  you know, cancer is a huge deal. Yes.
• 53:17
  I don't care if it's a dog. Like to me, it's like, this is
• 53:20
  my child. And like, after what we've just
• 53:23
  gone through over the last year, so like, I feel like we are
• 53:27
  allowed to feel how we feel, but also we don't have to put like a
• 53:31
  ton of pressure on other people to like, understand how we feel.
• 53:35
  But I totally get that. That's exactly how I felt so
• 53:37
  many times. Yeah, it's such a yeah.
• 53:39
  It's a weird. I don't, I don't remember ever
• 53:44
  feeling that way about things where it's just you're way more
• 53:47
  aware of. And maybe it's when the bigger
• 53:50
  things happen where then you're, you're much more aware of like
• 53:54
  how you would like someone to respond when it's something that
• 53:57
  feels bigger in your life. And yeah.
• 54:01
  That person too, like I can definitely think back on like,
• 54:04
  you know, even past friendships and stuff of like, you know, the
• 54:08
  thing that they were going through probably felt way
• 54:09
  heavier than the way that like I saw it because I wasn't the one
• 54:13
  going through it. So like, I'm not here saying
• 54:15
  that I've always been like the perfect person of like reaching
• 54:19
  out when I should or you know. You're the most thoughtful
• 54:23
  friend I. Thank you.
• 54:25
  I I definitely try to be and I 'cause I want to be like, not
• 54:28
  because I feel like I should, like I want to be that because
• 54:32
  I, I want people to think of me too when I'm like, and I'm not
• 54:35
  doing it in like a way of like, I'm gonna treat people this way
• 54:38
  so they treat me that way. No, but I just know what it
• 54:40
  feels like to be thought of. Yeah.
• 54:42
  You know, to be cared for and stuff like that.
• 54:45
  I think that's why like on here, I feel like a little bit more
• 54:49
  comfortable, like talking about personal things is because
• 54:51
  obviously I'm getting like it's a conversation with you.
• 54:55
  I, I think I struggle sometimes about like posting, like if I
• 54:59
  were to post something about birdie or like what we went
• 55:02
  through with Casey is like, I, I don't want to be and I know it's
• 55:07
  not, but it's just like, I don't want to put that on other people
• 55:11
  or like, and so it's so weird for me.
• 55:14
  It's like sometimes I'm like, I, I appreciate when people share
• 55:17
  what they have going on in their life because it just makes
• 55:19
  everyone so human and I want to be able to put thoughts towards
• 55:22
  them, you know, send well wishes or something like that.
• 55:25
  But sometimes I feel like I don't want someone to have to
• 55:28
  like, you know, maybe they're not in a, maybe it's just from
• 55:31
  this last year and a half. Maybe they're not in a space
• 55:33
  right now to hear that, to like see that word like, and I know
• 55:36
  how like triggering it is for Casey to see people post like
• 55:39
  my, I'm just going to use this as an example.
• 55:41
  My, you know, grandfather passed away from this.
• 55:44
  And it's like the C word. Like, I just know how like even
• 55:47
  just seeing that on his feed, it's like he can't look at that.
• 55:51
  But then we've done a lot of like reflection and stuff of
• 55:54
  like, OK, well then don't don't be scrolling, right?
• 55:57
  You know, it's like we can't also protect everyone that's,
• 56:01
  you know, choosing to scroll, choosing to look through things.
• 56:03
  But that's kind of like my own battle, I think.
• 56:06
  I don't think I've always been that way.
• 56:07
  I definitely this past year and a half has definitely made me
• 56:09
  more like, I don't know what what I should share, what I
• 56:12
  shouldn't because like, again, want to protect KC, want to
• 56:15
  protect other people and stuff like that.
• 56:18
  But again, we, we can't control how people feel and we just are
• 56:23
  gonna try to do our best. And same with us.
• 56:24
  We're allowed to feel hurt feelings.
• 56:26
  Hurt, annoyed, pissed. Yes.
• 56:28
  All the stuff. Yeah, well, it's like whatever I
• 56:30
  see where like someone I know, her dad passed away recently and
• 56:34
  I have a really hard time being totally like there for someone.
• 56:40
  Would that happen with them? So I feel like that's just what
• 56:42
  you were talking about, where I just think it's a good reminder
• 56:44
  of you never know what someone else is going through.
• 56:47
  So also when I think about my mother-in-law, who knows, maybe
• 56:50
  she's having a really hard time and the way she showed up that
• 56:53
  day was just the best she could do.
• 56:54
  And that does help me when those situations happen.
• 56:58
  But yeah, I think, Oh yeah, coming back to you are the most
• 57:02
  thoughtful friend I have ever had.
• 57:05
  Seriously. But yeah, I think with like
• 57:07
  sharing stuff because sometimes when I share things, it's coming
• 57:10
  from a place of like I'm almost rebelling where it's not Even so
• 57:15
  much like I from a specific of like, oh, I want to be
• 57:19
  vulnerable and that kind of thing.
• 57:22
  It's more like recently having a feeling about Instagram is it's
• 57:25
  a highlight reel and and also knowing that I probably
• 57:29
  perpetuate that in some way. But yeah.
• 57:32
  That, but I well, I really like when you post it.
• 57:34
  I was like, yeah, I feel like that so much right now of like
• 57:37
  that the highlight reel, even though I've not been posting at
• 57:39
  all, but like, you know, I'm so I still have like, thank
• 57:43
  goodness I am a person that does like my scheduled posts because
• 57:46
  I'd be not posting anything right now because I don't freak
• 57:48
  like I don't care. But then I like I don't care.
• 57:53
  But I do like I crave normalcy when I'm feeling like something
• 57:57
  is out of my control. So that's a little part of like
• 57:59
  I still like to kind of show up in that sort of way of just like
• 58:03
  creating something. Oops, I'm sorry, I just totally
• 58:05
  knocked the table. But creating something that like
• 58:09
  feels so easy to create. I like that because it's like
• 58:14
  gives me a piece of normalcy. But anything I have to put much
• 58:16
  thought into right now, I'm actually very, very happy that
• 58:19
  right now we just have up until Saturday boarding dogs.
• 58:24
  And I'm very, very happy about that because I just don't feel
• 58:27
  like even though I know I could show up and train the dogs
• 58:31
  totally fine right now, I know I can't show up the way I'd want
• 58:34
  to. Like on stories.
• 58:35
  I would feel like I'd be like, hey, I'm having yeah, if I
• 58:39
  especially if I didn't like talk about it on here.
• 58:41
  Like not that everyone's going to listen to it, but like when
• 58:44
  we post in our stories, like I'm going to say something about
• 58:46
  like little life update, it'll just make me feel like I got it
• 58:50
  off my chest type. Of thing, yes.
• 58:52
  Oh, I totally get that because especially with showing up on
• 58:54
  stories, I yeah, I know what you mean, right.
• 58:58
  I don't want to share anything when I'm feeling a certain way.
• 59:00
  Totally. I'm so excited for.
• 59:03
  It's obviously not going to be done for a while just because
• 59:05
  the piece of equipment doesn't deliver until May 29th, but our
• 59:08
  garage is. I painted.
• 59:10
  I love the color, how it turned out.
• 59:12
  We got our yeah, it's like a dark espresso Gray, sort of a
• 59:18
  hue of purple. And I'm loving it.
• 59:22
  Yeah. And then almost all of our
• 59:24
  dumbbells and our dumbbell rack delivered.
• 59:27
  Yeah, I'm just, it's, it's looking really cool.
• 59:29
  And I'm, we're super excited about it.
• 59:31
  So that was fun. We like, did that this weekend
• 59:33
  together, Like we did deep clean, got rid of so much stuff,
• 59:37
  got everything like reorganized and hung up and the mats put in
• 59:42
  and assembled, the dumbbell rack, the bench.
• 59:46
  So yeah, I'm super excited about that.
• 59:49
  That's so exciting. That's like a glimmer of
• 59:51
  happiness. Totally.
• 59:53
  I know. And the next couple of days
• 59:55
  should hopefully be like warming up and stuff.
• 59:57
  So I'm like, even though we only have dumbbells out there, I'm
• 59:59
  like, I'm gonna do a workout out there at some point.
• 1:00:04
  Go ahead. Well, the one of the first times
• 1:00:06
  you stayed with us when we had our gym equipment out there, at
• 1:00:10
  least like this. What I remember one time you
• 1:00:12
  were like, well, you know what you're wait, how do you say
• 1:00:15
  what? You know where you'll find me?
• 1:00:18
  Yes. I love it.
• 1:00:22
  Well, I just love the like, especially on the days because
• 1:00:26
  again, we we'll probably keep one of our Planet Fitness
• 1:00:29
  memberships just for like traveling or whatever, But I'm
• 1:00:32
  super excited to just be like, I'm just going to walk outside
• 1:00:34
  into the gym. Just going to go out there.
• 1:00:37
  I don't even have to drive. Yeah, we did that on Easter and
• 1:00:39
  I was like, other people don't get to work out right now.
• 1:00:41
  Oh, and that's a mess. I feel bad.
• 1:00:44
  I mean, like a Planet Fitness is open, like people could go work
• 1:00:47
  out, but like, Oh yeah, Planet Fitness was, I'm sure there's
• 1:00:52
  some that are not, but I didn't, I was thinking I'm like, I'm not
• 1:00:56
  going to go drive there on Easter, but like I had plenty of
• 1:00:59
  downtime. I'm like, I would have.
• 1:01:00
  So it was just fun setting it up on Easter.
• 1:01:02
  So that's. Basically, that's so exciting.
• 1:01:04
  Yeah. So we did that and then filled
• 1:01:06
  up our bird feeders and Casey's. Did I tell you that in that area
• 1:01:11
  we're doing like a Meadow wildflower thing?
• 1:01:14
  Yes, Yeah. So the seeds for that's
• 1:01:15
  delivering today. So fun.
• 1:01:18
  To make a picture of the the seed packets.
• 1:01:20
  I will, yeah, 'cause I was like, why aren't we just going to a
• 1:01:23
  store? And it's like Casey's like, no,
• 1:01:24
  no, no, I'm, I'm ordering these wildflowers.
• 1:01:27
  I'm like, OK, whatever you say. So I'm sure you'll see it and be
• 1:01:31
  like, oh. I'm so excited.
• 1:01:34
  Yeah, well, to be fair, I was thinking like we would just
• 1:01:37
  order a couple of little like packets.
• 1:01:38
  He's like, no, I needed to order like the big space.
• 1:01:41
  I'm like, all right, so I'm. Getting into my.
• 1:01:44
  Bags to be determined. I don't really know.
• 1:01:47
  I had nothing to do with this. What am I excited about?
• 1:01:50
  Yeah, I was getting upset because when I was looking back
• 1:01:52
  on April of last year and our zinnias, we're going crazy in
• 1:01:57
  our garden and right now they're like, they look like, it's like
• 1:02:02
  a bunch of different colors, really bright.
• 1:02:04
  They're like big and but I had some sprouts out there that
• 1:02:08
  we're growing and it was like my favorite thing in the morning to
• 1:02:10
  check on them slugs or eating them.
• 1:02:13
  Oh no, even though I didn't find slugs a little cute.
• 1:02:16
  Is that weird? Oh no, I was thinking I would
• 1:02:18
  like to write a children's book about a slug named Sally.
• 1:02:21
  I wrote OK, I need to get it from my parents house the next
• 1:02:24
  time I'm there and read it to you.
• 1:02:26
  It's actually really, really sad.
• 1:02:28
  I wrote a children's book when I was a kid about a snail.
• 1:02:32
  I think it was a snail or was some sort of bug and I was young
• 1:02:37
  and it is like basically talking about this bug being bullied
• 1:02:43
  from her body and like it is it has body dysmorphia and like
• 1:02:49
  written all over it. And I would have never known as
• 1:02:51
  a kid. And I like read it like my my
• 1:02:53
  sister. She's like Kate.
• 1:02:54
  I cried reading this because she's like that like made me
• 1:02:57
  feel like you were like so hurt when you were writing this and
• 1:03:00
  talking about like this little bug being bullied because of how
• 1:03:02
  she looked and because of her size and stuff like that.
• 1:03:06
  Oh my gosh, no. So I have got I'm gonna read it
• 1:03:11
  to you guys and you're. You have to bring it.
• 1:03:14
  So sad. I'm gonna be so.
• 1:03:16
  Sad literally, it's so it's like it was actually like really sad
• 1:03:20
  to read it because like, you know, we have all had our
• 1:03:23
  things, but definitely like as a young girl, I've had major like
• 1:03:28
  I was bullied for like, and I don't think I looked at it as
• 1:03:31
  bullied back then because it's just like, you know, bullying.
• 1:03:34
  You kind of think of like someone like in the cafeteria
• 1:03:37
  being like you're ugly and fat. Like no one did that.
• 1:03:41
  But like there would be comments of like, you know, like I was
• 1:03:46
  like the chubby sister and I'm like, I would like hear that
• 1:03:49
  kind of stuff and I'm like, Oh my gosh.
• 1:03:51
  And it's so interesting now because like I obviously at this
• 1:03:56
  phase, like I'm very much like focused on like strength and all
• 1:03:59
  of that. And like I love being healthy,
• 1:04:01
  but I'm definitely not in that. Like, let me try to get as small
• 1:04:04
  as I can get, which I used to feel that way.
• 1:04:06
  And when I focused on like, let me get as small as I can get, I
• 1:04:09
  wasn't getting any smaller because it was like my brain was
• 1:04:12
  just, you know, so I have such a different relationship with like
• 1:04:15
  my body and food now in such a healthy way that it's like so
• 1:04:19
  sad to see that because like, I remember it, but not to the
• 1:04:22
  extent that like my mom and sister remember it.
• 1:04:25
  Oh my gosh. Really?
• 1:04:26
  No. Yeah.
• 1:04:28
  I was also made fun of for my weight when I was little.
• 1:04:31
  What the heck? People, I think it's just, I
• 1:04:33
  know I feel like stuff like that.
• 1:04:35
  And that's why we're sometimes with like stories and like
• 1:04:37
  storytelling now. It gives purpose for me to those
• 1:04:41
  moments. Yes, because I feel like you
• 1:04:43
  wouldn't have any stories if you grew up and everything was fine
• 1:04:45
  and nothing happened. I don't know.
• 1:04:47
  Even though that's what I really wished for.
• 1:04:49
  And but Oh my God, I told you how I I wanted to write a book
• 1:04:53
  about a ladybug named Lizzie and it would be all her bug friends
• 1:04:58
  and they all have different shapes and sizes.
• 1:05:00
  I need to literally text my mom after this and be like can you
• 1:05:03
  send me a picture of that bug book I wrote so I can send it to
• 1:05:06
  you and then I need to get it so I can read it on here but like.
• 1:05:10
  You need to write the children's book about.
• 1:05:12
  No mine was depressing. Mine was sad.
• 1:05:15
  It ended up having like A and then she made friends with.
• 1:05:19
  Another snail. I don't.
• 1:05:21
  Remember if. It was some sort of bug.
• 1:05:23
  It was a bug of some sort. And the illustrations, I got to
• 1:05:26
  say pretty Dang cute. I mean, really have giant eyes.
• 1:05:31
  Yeah, but I can see the cover in my head.
• 1:05:32
  It's like this green fabric cover.
• 1:05:36
  Green fabric. Yeah, I put fabric on it Sure
• 1:05:39
  did. This is sure did love.
• 1:05:41
  Knowing this about you. Who would have thought?
• 1:05:43
  I'm really not that. Like, I am not like my sister
• 1:05:46
  has like a junk journal and she journals every day and writes
• 1:05:49
  and she's so creative. I am not.
• 1:05:50
  I'm like stick figures. But I wrote a children's book as
• 1:05:53
  a child. It's slightly trauma, trauma
• 1:05:57
  related. Oh man.
• 1:06:00
  Oh my gosh, I love that so much. Yeah, have your own send you a
• 1:06:03
  picture. I will.
• 1:06:03
  So how's our dog training podcast going?
• 1:06:06
  We never said it was dog training.
• 1:06:08
  Never. We never did happen to be dog
• 1:06:10
  trainers. And sometimes it pops in here
• 1:06:12
  and there. Here and there, not only this
• 1:06:14
  one. And that's OK.
• 1:06:15
  We talked about dogs. At least we talked about the
• 1:06:17
  cutest girl in the world. BB Yes.
• 1:06:19
  BB Mm Hmm. I mean in the sun over there
• 1:06:23
  would. It be weird if I sent her dead
• 1:06:25
  lizards in the mail. Dead.
• 1:06:28
  Well they can't be alive can they?
• 1:06:30
  Because y'all don't have lizards and she.
• 1:06:31
  Would be, I know, but she likes to chase them.
• 1:06:34
  Not don't send that lizards. Don't send me anything dead.
• 1:06:40
  I'm thinking like how people press flowers into stuff like I
• 1:06:43
  could press. No, no, I'm so glad you checked
• 1:06:48
  with me first. If that showed up I'd be like Oh
• 1:06:51
  my God, maybe like a lizard toy would be nice, like a fake.
• 1:06:56
  Like a lizard vision board or something.
• 1:06:57
  Yeah, much better than a pressed.
• 1:07:00
  Pictures not pressed dead. Lizard, It's not like a
• 1:07:03
  butterfly, like a pressed butterfly.
• 1:07:05
  I think that kind of happens because you find them dead.
• 1:07:07
  Which I mean, I guess if you found a dead lizard you could
• 1:07:10
  press it, but don't go kill a lizard.
• 1:07:13
  Oh yeah, I didn't even think about that.
• 1:07:14
  Yeah. You'd have to.
• 1:07:14
  Where would I find a? Murderer.
• 1:07:16
  Oh my God, I didn't. I didn't even enter the
• 1:07:18
  conversation of what my brain was.
• 1:07:20
  And honestly, if there was a dead lizard in your backyard,
• 1:07:23
  your chickens probably ate it. Oh yeah.
• 1:07:26
  Which is great for them, Circle of life.
• 1:07:28
  But don't send me a dead lizard, OK.
• 1:07:30
  Yeah. Oh, my God.
• 1:07:32
  Can you imagine? Yes, I can actually.
• 1:07:34
  I can imagine just being like, oh.
• 1:07:37
  That's my intention would be for.
• 1:07:38
  Me and you always have really good intentions I'd.
• 1:07:41
  Throw out a couple leaves to like, replicate the Bush
• 1:07:43
  experience she had here where she's constantly staring for
• 1:07:46
  lizard. But yeah, I can.
• 1:07:47
  Prepare her for next visit. She's right here.
• 1:07:50
  Come here. Bebe.
• 1:07:51
  Bernie, come here. Hi babies girl.
• 1:08:00
  She never wears her collar but this is the first time ever she
• 1:08:03
  had to get X-rays today and I'm like well I'm going to put a
• 1:08:05
  collar on her just in case I need to grab her because I'm
• 1:08:07
  like I have no idea how she's going to be.
• 1:08:09
  Was she still good? Well, they said she did.
• 1:08:12
  She came back to the room because we couldn't be back
• 1:08:14
  there for the X-rays and she's just like and so anxious.
• 1:08:20
  But they said she did really well.
• 1:08:21
  So I don't know what their definition of really well is,
• 1:08:24
  but we'll take it. Anytime, like something happens,
• 1:08:27
  we're like when we brought Theo and he growls at the vet and
• 1:08:31
  they were like, Oh no, we've seen way worse.
• 1:08:32
  And I'm like, Oh yeah, of course, yeah.
• 1:08:34
  Of course, but I also, I'm like, I of course feel kind of like
• 1:08:37
  she gets kind of like, well, the last couple of times we've gone
• 1:08:40
  to the vet, the first one was just like her primary like
• 1:08:42
  checking out, making sure she's good.
• 1:08:44
  So they're giving her so many treats and they give her a lick
• 1:08:47
  mat and she's so over stimulated.
• 1:08:49
  She like is food obsessed. And so this time and then last
• 1:08:53
  time she also got all of that. So she's just like, I'm like,
• 1:08:56
  whatever, I'm going to let it go.
• 1:08:57
  But this time we're in there and she couldn't have anything to
• 1:09:00
  eat because she had to be fasted for her blood draw.
• 1:09:04
  And so she's just like, I'm like, Oh no, she's being totally
• 1:09:08
  like. But of course I'm in my state of
• 1:09:11
  mind right now. I'm like, I'm not gonna yell at
• 1:09:12
  you for anything. You do whatever you want.
• 1:09:15
  My. Precious Angel.
• 1:09:17
  I love that color. Isn't it so birdie?
• 1:09:20
  B She's the prettiest girl in the Hawaii world.
• 1:09:24
  Oh my gosh, I didn't think about the picture that I told you I
• 1:09:27
  was thinking about, but and also the picture I took of her.
• 1:09:29
  I think it's a picture her curled up when I was visiting
• 1:09:32
  you and she's like all like squish and like.
• 1:09:35
  Her. I love all of it.
• 1:09:37
  Yeah, I have her hair all over my face.
• 1:09:39
  OK, well what are you doing the rest of your day?
• 1:09:42
  I have a boarding drop. Is getting dropped off toast who
• 1:09:45
  you met? Oh yeah, working on a few
• 1:09:49
  creative things and then. Watching Cross and watching.
• 1:09:54
  Love on the Well, that'll be a nighttime show, because probably
• 1:09:55
  might want to watch it. Totally.
• 1:09:57
  Yeah, maybe. Having watch Love on the
• 1:09:58
  spectrum Love on the spectrum. OK, gotta get caught up.
• 1:10:01
  On Logan's Day. Yes, you do.
• 1:10:03
  It's hilarious. She walks up.
• 1:10:05
  This is all I'll say is and she's really sweet.
• 1:10:08
  She walks up and he just goes hi, that's it.
• 1:10:13
  Like and I loved, I'm guessing you saw this part because I
• 1:10:16
  think this is where it cut off. Did you see where he made it
• 1:10:19
  through the restaurant and then sat down at the table?
• 1:10:21
  Yeah. How endearing was it?
• 1:10:23
  I don't know if you caught this, him walking through the
• 1:10:25
  restaurant because it was loud and kind of over stimulating and
• 1:10:28
  he walks through it quickly and he gets out and he goes.
• 1:10:30
  I did it. I need to rewind.
• 1:10:34
  Yes, watch those little moments. It's like, OK.
• 1:10:37
  He was so proud of himself that he made it through the loud room
• 1:10:39
  and he sat down. He's like, I, I did it.
• 1:10:41
  I was like. Oh well, I love when he's
• 1:10:44
  sitting there waiting and he's like I can or I don't know if
• 1:10:46
  it's I can do this or I deserve this.
• 1:10:48
  I. Deserve this, yes.
• 1:10:50
  And one of my favorite moments was because it's editing when
• 1:10:53
  he's doing getting the the suit and he sees the other guy and
• 1:10:58
  he's like, Oh my God, I forget his sister's name.
• 1:11:00
  He's like, oh, he's right. I'd love I need that.
• 1:11:04
  And then he's like, no, no, I'm going to let him have it or
• 1:11:06
  however he says it. And then it cuts to him wearing
• 1:11:09
  it was the. Fact that you said that is
• 1:11:10
  awesome because Casey goes that editing was epic.
• 1:11:13
  He's like, that was. So.
• 1:11:14
  Editing how he literally, yeah, he's literally like no, no, no,
• 1:11:17
  no, I'm going to let him have it.
• 1:11:18
  And then three seconds later he's wearing it.
• 1:11:20
  And during the entire date, his bow ties crooked the whole time.
• 1:11:24
  It is. So funny.
• 1:11:26
  One last thing. I.
• 1:11:26
  Have to say about this that you're going to notice now too
• 1:11:29
  is Kean, the producer who is like in the background asking
• 1:11:33
  them questions and stuff. He calls him Sean all over the
• 1:11:36
  time. It's.
• 1:11:37
  So Logan will be like, yeah, Sean.
• 1:11:39
  And then Kean will go. It's Kean.
• 1:11:41
  He's like, sorry, Kean. Logan.
• 1:11:43
  Calls him. Sean Logan calls him Sean.
• 1:11:47
  So like literally throughout the entire season, he'll do it.
• 1:11:51
  He'll call him Kean as well, but like he'll throw in a Shawn and
• 1:11:54
  then every single time and now it's just a part of the show.
• 1:11:57
  Kean. I was like, it's Kean.
• 1:11:58
  And he's like, sorry, Kean it is.
• 1:12:02
  It's so pure. That's what I loved about
• 1:12:04
  Casey's video he did. I, I am like craving like this.
• 1:12:07
  Like this is a pure real conversation.
• 1:12:09
  This is what I'm craving. It's like the stuff where no
• 1:12:12
  one's trying to like, be a certain way, it's just who they
• 1:12:15
  are. Truly.
• 1:12:17
  What are you doing the rest of the day?
• 1:12:19
  I have booked the private dog park.
• 1:12:21
  I'm going to bring these four dogs that are from the same
• 1:12:24
  household, love them and three of them are very high active
• 1:12:27
  dogs. And they also are basically like
• 1:12:30
  we're definitely in their home away from home.
• 1:12:32
  So they're just they're so good and easy when they come here,
• 1:12:35
  but they definitely need a little bit more activity.
• 1:12:37
  So I'm bringing them there to run around.
• 1:12:39
  Otherwise I don't really have anything else on the schedule
• 1:12:41
  for today. Tomorrow cat who has already
• 1:12:46
  done the trainer in you and then she's coming back to the August
• 1:12:49
  1 and the person that also just joined is they're coming
• 1:12:52
  together. That's so.
• 1:12:54
  Exciting, yeah. So she actually gets here
• 1:12:56
  tomorrow because I offered a little bit ago, basically like a
• 1:13:01
  one-on-one, come bring your dog and we'll go.
• 1:13:05
  It was kind of like a reactive reset for this owner and dog.
• 1:13:09
  She's coming for three days to work with me one-on-one with a
• 1:13:12
  training dog that she just needs extra help with and stuff like
• 1:13:16
  that. So we'll be spending the next
• 1:13:17
  three days together and I'll be helping her with a training dog.
• 1:13:21
  So it'll be really nice because that's the only like training
• 1:13:25
  I'll be doing in the next three days, which will be a.
• 1:13:27
  Cool opportunity. Yeah, yeah, it's, it is like I
• 1:13:31
  when I did it with an owner and dog, I think it was such a great
• 1:13:34
  fit because it's one of those types of situations where it's
• 1:13:36
  like this wasn't an untrained dog coming like this owner was
• 1:13:39
  already like E collar training, doing all the things, just
• 1:13:42
  really having a hard time with reactivity.
• 1:13:44
  And then of course this dog that's coming like is trained
• 1:13:47
  like cat knows what she's doing. It's just, again, sometimes
• 1:13:50
  you're too close to it or you just, you know, so she wants to
• 1:13:53
  bring the dog here to set up new situations to be able to help
• 1:13:57
  the dog and then obviously help their own that owner, so.
• 1:14:01
  That's so cool. Yeah, so she gets here.
• 1:14:04
  Tomorrow. Oh, fun.
• 1:14:06
  Yeah. OK, well that's something fun to
• 1:14:08
  do. Totally.
• 1:14:10
  But OK, I will also send you pictures of that book.
• 1:14:14
  Yes, Casey's old cover of his podcast and I'll send you an
• 1:14:18
  updated picture of what the gym's looking like.
• 1:14:21
  Yes, please. OK, cool.
• 1:14:24
  And. I'll send you a picture of the
• 1:14:26
  bench with pollen on it. Perfect.
• 1:14:29
  OK. You should put it out on the
• 1:14:31
  road and just put free and just no.
• 1:14:33
  He would not. He's still upset with me.
• 1:14:35
  I threw away that one white coffee cup.
• 1:14:39
  Oh no, OK, I mentioned it. This morning, no.
• 1:14:41
  No, really. Oh yeah.
• 1:14:44
  Oh my gosh. OK, Bobby.
• 1:14:47
  He just throws those things in. So a bench that's been sitting
• 1:14:50
  out there for whatever reason, no, no.
• 1:14:53
  Don't want to add that to the list, no.
• 1:14:54
  Yeah, No. OK, cool.
• 1:14:56
  All right. Well, you have a great rest of
• 1:14:57
  your day. You too.
• 1:14:58
  OK, I'll talk to you soon. Bye.