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Black Widow Russian Brides · Microphone Monkeys

1:05
SPEAKER_07: Here we come, walking down the street.
1:08
SPEAKER_07: Got the gold, no taxes to me.
1:12
SPEAKER_07: Free to speak and free to trade.
1:16
SPEAKER_07: Markets have no need for okay.
1:21
SPEAKER_07: We're the microphone monkeys.
1:24
SPEAKER_07: People say we're at our kids' front trees.
1:27
SPEAKER_07: But we're too busy being free.
1:31
SPEAKER_07: Hey, we're the microphone.
1:33
SPEAKER_05: Hey guys, this is Microphone Monkeys, and this week we have Russian wives sending husbands to war for profit.
1:39
SPEAKER_05: What?
1:40
SPEAKER_05: Uh Booby Aerodynamics.
1:43
SPEAKER_05: Yay.
1:44
SPEAKER_05: Does that go with that uniboob?
1:46
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, uniboob would be even more for the tour de France.
1:50
SPEAKER_05: Nipples up.
1:51
SPEAKER_05: We have dildo bomb squads.
1:54
SPEAKER_05: Jeez.
1:54
SPEAKER_05: Rampaging Indonesian monkeys and North Korean dog soup.
1:58
SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
1:59
SPEAKER_05: That's a good one.
2:01
SPEAKER_05: This is we just did one podcast.
2:02
SPEAKER_05: We're going straight into the second one.
2:04
SPEAKER_05: That's right.
2:05
SPEAKER_05: This has been a uh this has been a wild day so far in our podcast world.
2:10
SPEAKER_05: Yep.
2:11
SPEAKER_05: But the first story that I have to get up on my phone real quick if we want to do some filler.
2:19
SPEAKER_06: Look at my wife over there with the million apps open.
2:22
SPEAKER_06: That's right.
2:25
SPEAKER_01: All that and the uh uh the government's probably throttling them because they're trying to get through his phone.
2:31
SPEAKER_05: I was researching these these dildo bomb squads, so don't look at my lab suicide dil dildo bomb squads.
2:39
SPEAKER_05: Well, this is related to DC.
2:41
SPEAKER_05: They had a whole meltdown.
2:42
SPEAKER_01: Well, I thought it was something that the uh Israelis were doing to eliminate the rest of the uh the new pager.
2:48
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
2:49
SPEAKER_05: Exploding.
2:53
SPEAKER_05: If these left wingers keep opposing Israel, there's gonna be some dildos exploding.
3:00
SPEAKER_05: Giving up on men, ladies, watch out.
3:04
SPEAKER_05: But our first story.
3:07
SPEAKER_05: So Russian black widows marry vulnerable men before sending them off to war for profit.
3:15
SPEAKER_05: Hey, that's it.
3:16
SPEAKER_06: How does that work?
3:17
SPEAKER_06: How are you convincing me to go off to war just by marrying them?
3:24
SPEAKER_04: Who are these men though?
3:24
SPEAKER_04: Like in Russia, they have the draft, right?
3:26
SPEAKER_05: Well, once they deplete the draft and and they're having a hard time getting everyone to go, I guess this m this is their new honeypot strategy.
3:34
SPEAKER_06: Is this Putin's way of uh drafting?
3:37
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, this is the way he's doing some new tactics on the former, or are they rushing?
3:43
SPEAKER_05: Well, it's all in Russia.
3:45
SPEAKER_01: Well, what what it is is is these these women are finding the a lot of them that have already had men that have died in the war are finding other men that are of military age, getting them down the aisle so that they get the insurances and the benefits.
4:01
SPEAKER_01: Oh, yeah, yeah.
4:02
SPEAKER_01: And crossing their fingers that they get eliminated during the war so they get to get paid off.
4:08
SPEAKER_05: See, I thought American women were bad.
4:10
SPEAKER_05: At least American gold diggers, they just want a rich husband.
4:13
SPEAKER_05: I guess in Russia.
4:15
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, they want the in Russia, they just apparently want to skip all that.
4:19
SPEAKER_06: We don't need sex here.
4:21
SPEAKER_06: You just go into war and I go-ching, ch-ching.
4:24
SPEAKER_06: That's right.
4:25
SPEAKER_06: Wow.
4:25
SPEAKER_04: Yeah, they're this this is a real thing.
4:27
SPEAKER_04: Oh, yeah.
4:29
SPEAKER_01: I like the sex stuff.
4:31
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, I don't know.
4:32
SPEAKER_05: I don't like the war-death draft stuff.
4:37
SPEAKER_06: You go.
4:39
SPEAKER_05: It says materialistic women in Russia are tricking gullible men into sham marriages before sending them to be killed on the front lines in the Russia-Ukraine conflict.
4:49
SPEAKER_05: Now, their spouses or closest relatives received lump sums of money starting at five million rubles, which is about sixty thousand dollars.
4:57
SPEAKER_01: I guess they ran out of uh uh uh North Koreans and Cubans on the front lines, so they have to be on the front lines themselves now.
5:06
SPEAKER_05: Now they're doing tender warfare.
5:10
SPEAKER_05: But sometimes exceeding eight million rubles, which is over a hundred thousand dollars.
5:14
SPEAKER_05: Oh this is the government's way of reassuring cons con conscripts that if or rather win, they lose their lives on the battlefield, their families are taken care of.
5:24
SPEAKER_05: It's a straightforward system, but it's being exploited by some ruthless profiteers.
5:29
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, of the female persuasion.
5:33
SPEAKER_05: Wow, that's the female Russian mafia.
5:36
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, yeah.
5:37
SPEAKER_05: Eastern European women have always been a little more uh they got a racket.
5:42
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, yeah.
5:43
SPEAKER_05: They they they're a little less uh empathetic, you might say, than others.
5:47
SPEAKER_01: Come on, she's our first lady still.
5:53
SPEAKER_04: Whoa.
5:53
SPEAKER_04: Well, see, that's how she absorbs all this.
5:55
SPEAKER_04: I wasn't going there, but you know.
6:00
SPEAKER_05: You keep the Manhattan Penthouse, and I'll let you be in the Epstein files.
6:03
SPEAKER_05: There you go.
6:06
SPEAKER_05: Ever since the Russia-Ukraine war began, Russia media has been reporting about so-called black widows, women who approach and trick men into marriage, just so they can send them off to war and cash their compensation check as soon as they get killed.
6:18
SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
6:18
SPEAKER_05: CNN recently sat down with Maria, a 37-year-old from St.
6:22
SPEAKER_05: Petersburg.
6:22
SPEAKER_05: Ooh, I've been there, yeah.
6:24
SPEAKER_05: Ooh, yeah.
6:25
SPEAKER_05: Whose father, which is where Ayn Rand's from, by the way, too.
6:28
SPEAKER_05: Whose father had recently been shot on the front lines in Ukraine.
6:32
SPEAKER_05: She didn't even know that her father had enlisted in the Russian army, nor that he had married his someone 22 years his junior.
6:39
SPEAKER_04: That makes sense.
6:40
SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
6:40
SPEAKER_04: That's what you do.
6:42
SPEAKER_04: Just run out there and marry somebody 22 years younger than you.
6:45
SPEAKER_05: That is why not.
6:47
SPEAKER_04: It makes sense.
6:47
SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
6:48
SPEAKER_01: Well, you get older, it's like the other way around.
6:50
SPEAKER_01: He he knows he has to go to war.
6:53
SPEAKER_01: He's been conscripted.
6:55
SPEAKER_01: So he's got a chance chance that somebody is 22 years younger before you go.
7:01
SPEAKER_01: He's parlaying the whole thing.
7:03
SPEAKER_04: I bet, I bet though, I bet, like while they're over there fighting, these women are collecting a check.
7:10
SPEAKER_04: Right?
7:10
SPEAKER_04: They don't have to die.
7:11
SPEAKER_04: They're they're probably getting a check.
7:13
SPEAKER_04: Well, but think about it though.
7:14
SPEAKER_05: He's not there, they don't have to deal with them.
7:16
SPEAKER_05: They're only getting like 60 to 100,000 like one time.
7:18
SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
7:19
SPEAKER_05: If they die.
7:20
SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
7:21
SPEAKER_05: So I don't know how many rubles they're getting per month.
7:24
SPEAKER_05: If uh, you know, if they don't die.
7:26
SPEAKER_04: But that's yeah, yeah.
7:27
SPEAKER_05: You know, it's a it's a St.
7:28
SPEAKER_04: Petersburg is not cheap.
7:30
SPEAKER_04: Neither is Moscow.
7:31
SPEAKER_04: It's expensive.
7:32
SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
7:33
SPEAKER_05: Well, that's how they have to pay for all those fancy palace uh frosting looking buildings.
7:40
SPEAKER_05: Pay for the maintenance.
7:41
SPEAKER_05: Uh the the 22-year-old who was his junior, who apparently had no problem seeing him go off to war just two days into their marriage.
7:48
SPEAKER_05: Two days.
7:48
SPEAKER_05: That same woman at least get one hit at it, maybe two.
7:51
SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
7:52
SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
7:52
SPEAKER_05: The same woman who Maria has never met conveniently cashed the handsome compensation following her husband's death immediately.
7:59
SPEAKER_05: I'm still in shock and can't accept what happened.
8:02
SPEAKER_05: So I just thought this was a good one.
8:04
SPEAKER_05: Was he going anyways, though?
8:05
SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
8:06
SPEAKER_05: It's it's probably.
8:07
SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
8:08
SPEAKER_06: He was probably going in anyway.
8:10
SPEAKER_06: Yeah, so they're just I might as well get some noogie noogie before I go in.
8:14
SPEAKER_04: Well, it's she's targeting whoever the the widow, the black widows, like they know the demographic, and they're like, that's they're going.
8:21
SPEAKER_05: These are the most advanced prostitutes of all time.
8:24
SPEAKER_05: They bang the guy once or twice and get$100,000.
8:27
SPEAKER_05: It's a pretty good system.
8:28
SPEAKER_06: That's even better than you guys.
8:32
SPEAKER_01: Both parties are taking a pounding on this.
8:37
SPEAKER_04: We talked to Wolf Blitzer on the front lines.
8:40
SPEAKER_02: Wolf, do you have an update on this, on the Black Widow situation?
8:43
SPEAKER_02: In the Ukraine war that we started.
8:46
SPEAKER_02: You know, NATO's got to get in on this.
8:48
SPEAKER_05: We need to have Ukraine and NATO and start World War III.
8:51
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, we let's call Victoria Newland on the front lines.
8:54
SPEAKER_02: Victoria, how's it going?
8:55
SPEAKER_02: Have enough people died for you yet?
8:58
SPEAKER_05: That will be coming up.
8:59
SPEAKER_05: Miss Newland will be a theme in one of our upcoming podcasts.
9:03
SPEAKER_04: She's one of my favorites.
9:04
SPEAKER_05: Oh, yeah, she's so cool.
9:08
SPEAKER_05: Fan boys.
9:10
SPEAKER_05: She's like the uh who was the one who wrote in the New York Times Judy something in 2003, and she just repeated all the intelligence agency stuff.
9:19
SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
9:20
SPEAKER_05: I forget her name.
9:21
SPEAKER_05: I just saw her on YouTube the other day.
9:23
SPEAKER_05: Uh, but this one real estate agent said, It's simple, says real estate agent Marina Orlova said with a laugh, find a man who's serving in the special military operation, and when he gets killed, you get eight million rubles,$102,000.
9:37
SPEAKER_05: Lots of women are buying cheap apartments uh like these this these days.
9:41
SPEAKER_05: It's business.
9:42
SPEAKER_04: Oh, it's a business.
9:42
SPEAKER_04: You know, it's a business.
9:43
SPEAKER_04: It's okay.
9:44
SPEAKER_04: It's okay, it's just it's just business.
9:46
SPEAKER_05: It's kind of like a gallows business.
9:49
SPEAKER_05: That's the done, yeah.
9:51
SPEAKER_05: Oh, see, I didn't know Darren does the accents.
9:56
SPEAKER_05: He does.
9:56
SPEAKER_05: He he it's a squirrel.
9:59
SPEAKER_05: Darren's been to like Slovenia and Transylvania and I've been to Romania for Romania and Hungary.
10:07
SPEAKER_05: That's how I refer to Romania.
10:08
SPEAKER_05: It's just Transylvania.
10:10
SPEAKER_06: Kinda.
10:12
SPEAKER_06: But you know, in the same orbit.
10:13
SPEAKER_06: So which ones were the most difficult?
10:15
SPEAKER_06: I the well women.
10:17
SPEAKER_04: I mean, I don't know about the women really.
10:19
SPEAKER_04: I like I did doing work in Russia is extremely challenging.
10:23
SPEAKER_04: Like, because if you don't, you know, you look for tonality, you look for uh facial expression, body movement.
10:30
SPEAKER_05: They don't get any.
10:31
SPEAKER_05: Not the right part of Europe to look for that.
10:32
SPEAKER_04: Well, but that's how you understand business, right?
10:35
SPEAKER_04: That's how you understand the work that you're doing, is you have to focus on those things.
10:39
SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
10:39
SPEAKER_04: The Russians, it's you they're they always seem like they're angry, the men.
10:43
SPEAKER_04: It's like you never know if you're making progress because of the tonality, it's just all the time.
10:48
SPEAKER_04: And the women we were we were taught a bunch of lies.
10:51
SPEAKER_04: They they sound like the French.
10:52
SPEAKER_04: It's really, really soft spoken.
10:54
SPEAKER_04: They're quiet, they're delicate for the most part in the business setting.
10:59
SPEAKER_04: They're easier to read the situation, but the men I could never read the situation.
11:03
SPEAKER_04: I mean, I could understand terms because when you're talking technology, the terms are very English-oriented, but the facial expressions are absolutely rough.
11:13
SPEAKER_04: Rough exterior.
11:14
SPEAKER_04: Yeah, really rough exterior.
11:16
SPEAKER_04: Interesting stuff though, with them is like you'd ask them, you know, how were how were things?
11:21
SPEAKER_04: And they would just go, it was all a lie.
11:24
SPEAKER_04: It was all fraud.
11:25
SPEAKER_04: Nothing got done.
11:27
SPEAKER_04: So everybody would just pass the buck to somebody else, and nobody took responsibility for anything, and nothing ever got done, and nothing needed to get done.
11:36
SPEAKER_04: So it was all about moving up the ladder and the party, not about moving production forward.
11:44
SPEAKER_04: Right.
11:44
SPEAKER_05: Very similar kind of Chinese style.
11:46
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, similar government.
11:48
SPEAKER_06: I could do well over there.
11:49
SPEAKER_06: I got my eyes, and I know how to make things move.
11:53
SPEAKER_06: Yeah.
11:54
SPEAKER_06: If I could just be an angry garbage man and they won't be able to tell what I'm what my thoughts are, poker face it.
12:00
SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
12:03
SPEAKER_04: But they all they all thought I was English.
12:05
SPEAKER_04: No matter where in Eastern Europe, no matter where I went, it was like Englander.
12:09
SPEAKER_04: And I'm like, no, no, no, Coca-Cola.
12:11
SPEAKER_04: No, American Englander.
12:12
SPEAKER_05: Coca-Cola.
12:14
SPEAKER_06: Hamburgers.
12:18
SPEAKER_05: Well it's keeping on the female theme as as a uh transition.
12:24
SPEAKER_05: We have transitioning in the drag transitions.
12:29
SPEAKER_05: When are we going to this drag show?
12:33
SPEAKER_04: I love draws.
12:34
SPEAKER_04: We need to go.
12:34
SPEAKER_04: But yeah, you'd make a good, good Russian uh black widow transition.
12:39
SPEAKER_05: Oh, yeah.
12:39
SPEAKER_05: It'd be a little transitional, uh get the makeup on, shave up the beard a little bit.
12:46
SPEAKER_05: Oh, with the beard on.
12:47
SPEAKER_05: There you go.
12:48
SPEAKER_05: That might be fine with drag.
12:50
SPEAKER_05: I mean, I'll just keep it full beard and just go for it.
12:53
SPEAKER_05: But speaking of females, female cyclists accused of using bra padding to increase bus size and improve aerodynamics in the Tour de France.
13:04
SPEAKER_04: I thought that's yeah, that seems like it's in reverse.
13:09
SPEAKER_06: You would think you want less.
13:12
SPEAKER_06: Yeah, you want to wear those those tight sports bras.
13:17
SPEAKER_06: Well, yeah, they reduction.
13:18
SPEAKER_05: Well, wait a second now.
13:20
SPEAKER_05: When just like hey, you have the front of a car and how it's curved or like a Hayabusa, like a uh sport bike.
13:25
SPEAKER_03: Man, really.
13:31
SPEAKER_04: Well, if you got it.
13:32
SPEAKER_04: Well, she doesn't yeah, what the it might accelerate speed.
13:34
SPEAKER_06: You know, airlift on how airplanes are tape it into a uniboob.
13:38
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, they well, here's the thing.
13:40
SPEAKER_05: You know, it's just wrong on every level.
13:42
SPEAKER_05: It's like well now a uniboob, yeah, it might be a speed bullet fucking train.
13:52
SPEAKER_05: So here's the thing though, how do planes lift?
13:54
SPEAKER_05: You have a certain angle and it pushes up on the bottom and it raises the big thing.
14:01
SPEAKER_05: Emphasis on flying.
14:02
SPEAKER_04: Did she work with a team of scientists to come up with?
14:05
SPEAKER_04: Maybe physicists who is physicist, like that's her boyfriend or something.
14:08
SPEAKER_05: Maybe a female porn physicist.
14:10
SPEAKER_04: What do you need to do is lift these?
14:13
SPEAKER_05: Lift them at this angle, lift them at this angle, you fly right by.
14:16
SPEAKER_05: Fly right by.
14:17
SPEAKER_05: Well, what's happening is cyclists in the woman's tour de France are using padding in their bras to gain aerodynamic advantages during the race.
14:27
SPEAKER_06: And where is this again?
14:28
SPEAKER_06: France?
14:29
SPEAKER_05: This isn't France.
14:29
SPEAKER_05: This is the old Lance Armstrong.
14:31
SPEAKER_05: French women don't have big boobs anyway.
14:34
SPEAKER_05: It's hard to say.
14:35
SPEAKER_05: Maybe you get a little uh too many croissants and all of a sudden they have a little extra weight on them.
14:40
SPEAKER_05: Get the boobies plumped up.
14:42
SPEAKER_04: I think I think didn't they, didn't they, didn't they say, speaking of conspiracy, that uh the English women got their boobs are so big big because of the hormones and the milk?
14:52
SPEAKER_05: Oh, I think the cow milk.
14:55
SPEAKER_05: This is something you read.
14:56
SPEAKER_05: We were not discussing this.
14:57
SPEAKER_04: Well, we're talking about big boobs, and that they generally they're well.
15:02
SPEAKER_05: They got that.
15:03
SPEAKER_05: That's why they talk about those Irish titties or like two watermelons.
15:06
SPEAKER_04: We're really deviating here.
15:09
SPEAKER_05: Deviance.
15:10
SPEAKER_05: Deviance in many ways.
15:12
SPEAKER_05: The world of women's cycling is currently embroiled in a bizarre scandal involving the alleged use of bra padding to increase bust area in female competitors and modify airflow around the body, known as chest fairing.
15:27
SPEAKER_08: Chest fairing.
15:29
SPEAKER_05: Wasn't it waterboarding or what was it?
15:31
SPEAKER_05: What do they call it?
15:36
SPEAKER_05: A bizarre scandal, more like a brassier scandal.
15:40
SPEAKER_05: Chest fairing, I guess that might be like airplane lift.
15:43
SPEAKER_05: The controversial practice can allegedly decrease drag and give competitors an unfair advantage during races.
15:50
SPEAKER_05: According to experts, a smaller bust can favor the formation of a kind of air pocket at the level of the cyclist abdomen, which marginally increases the drag coefficient.
16:00
SPEAKER_06: Oh, so this is the it the what is it?
16:02
SPEAKER_06: Air tunnel between the bulbs?
16:04
SPEAKER_05: Well, this is why Chris Christie isn't uh a bicyclist.
16:08
SPEAKER_05: I know.
16:08
SPEAKER_05: He he gets a little too much too much of Brazier drag.
16:12
SPEAKER_04: The judges go by and measure them or something.
16:14
SPEAKER_04: Well, it's gonna be a big thing.
16:15
SPEAKER_04: Oh, you're treating with the uh these same too.
16:17
SPEAKER_06: Drag coefficient.
16:19
SPEAKER_05: Now they're gonna go from uh they're illegal size.
16:23
SPEAKER_05: They're gonna check if they're factory stock or not.
16:26
SPEAKER_05: It'll be like the helmets.
16:31
SPEAKER_05: It said, according to experts, this air pocket increases the drag coefficient.
16:35
SPEAKER_05: For example, uh Bert Blocken, professor of aerodynamics at uh here at Watt University in Scotland.
16:43
SPEAKER_05: He's making up names now.
16:47
SPEAKER_04: I'm a chest exerciser to make sure your chest is in line with your aerodynamic structure here.
16:53
SPEAKER_05: I'm a breast aerodynamic uh checker.
16:55
SPEAKER_04: Bert Blocken.
16:57
SPEAKER_05: Blocken.
16:58
SPEAKER_05: Aerodynamic expert.
17:00
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, he's the cock blocker of the Ivy Leagues.
17:04
SPEAKER_05: Uh told the British newspaper, The Telegraph, that chess fairing could provide a reduction of up to 3.6% in drag.
17:11
SPEAKER_05: The small percentage might not sound like a lot, but in a sport where even the slightest edge can make a huge difference, chess fairing is considered an unfair advantage.
17:20
SPEAKER_05: Originally reported in a Dutch newspaper, Wheeler Flitz, the chest fairing trend.
17:26
SPEAKER_05: I could just be fully picking these up, but it does it for itself.
17:30
SPEAKER_05: He sounds like a pervert.
17:33
SPEAKER_05: I want to analyze these chest aerodynamics.
17:41
SPEAKER_05: We did.
17:42
SPEAKER_04: What if they're born this way?
17:44
SPEAKER_05: Then what?
17:44
SPEAKER_05: Well, that's well, that's why they have to double check.
17:47
SPEAKER_04: You're double you're you're disqualified.
17:49
SPEAKER_04: You're you're born like that.
17:50
SPEAKER_05: Well, they need to frisk and make sure it's all natural materials in there.
17:54
SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
17:55
SPEAKER_05: This caused quite the scandal in the woman's cycling circuit.
17:58
SPEAKER_05: The cyclists taking part in this year's tour de France underwent an additional check of their clothing.
18:02
SPEAKER_05: It's unclear if the check uncovered the use of breast padding, but it's clear the organizers aim to discourage the practice.
18:09
SPEAKER_05: So I like the idea of further breast examination.
18:14
SPEAKER_05: So I think I should be part of the FBI.
18:17
SPEAKER_05: He's gonna retire from being the money sweeper.
18:20
SPEAKER_06: You're gonna be the judge over there to see if they're illegal or not.
18:25
SPEAKER_01: I still think money sweeper is better than FBI.
18:28
SPEAKER_04: You know, the the pre-race event on TV is probably gonna get more ratings than the race itself.
18:34
SPEAKER_04: They're like, okay, they're doing the rest examination.
18:41
SPEAKER_06: The honker test.
18:42
SPEAKER_04: They gotta look like it's no fun.
18:44
SPEAKER_04: I'm not having fun.
18:48
SPEAKER_05: Let me dial this in to look at the nipple angle real quick.
18:51
SPEAKER_05: Let me imagine a nipple.
18:54
SPEAKER_05: Quarter inch, okay.
18:55
SPEAKER_05: This, you know, this is titty aerodynamics.
18:58
SPEAKER_05: So these are things that have to be uh why don't we have a woman here on the panel?
19:03
SPEAKER_01: I know it'd be so much easier to un unravel these mysteries.
19:08
SPEAKER_05: Emphasis on unravel.
19:09
SPEAKER_05: What's the age restriction on this race?
19:14
SPEAKER_05: But I just thought, you know, speaking of uh speaking of potentially sexually related subjects, a DC I said nothing about any of this, man.
19:26
SPEAKER_04: I'm just like I'm biting my tongue because going, uh These are very What was the guy's name, Bert Bickelickel?
19:32
SPEAKER_04: What?
19:32
SPEAKER_05: Blocking.
19:33
SPEAKER_05: Bert Blocken.
19:34
SPEAKER_05: Burt Blocken.
19:38
SPEAKER_05: He's cock blocking the other professor so we can do the examination.
19:43
SPEAKER_02: You're disqualified.
19:47
SPEAKER_05: It feels a little too hard on this titty.
19:49
SPEAKER_05: I think we we're gonna take you out of the race.
19:52
SPEAKER_05: Uh DC Bomb Squad identifies suspicious device as adult toy.
19:58
SPEAKER_05: Well, weren't you just leaving DC?
20:00
SPEAKER_05: Did you did you forget anything in your packaging?
20:02
SPEAKER_05: Well, let me think.
20:03
SPEAKER_06: Did you leave your your uh dildo bag in there?
20:06
SPEAKER_06: Isn't that what DC stands for?
20:11
SPEAKER_04: A relative of mine is that will go unnamed.
20:14
SPEAKER_04: Uh-huh.
20:15
SPEAKER_04: Um, we were going through the detector in a court proceeding.
20:20
SPEAKER_04: Yep.
20:20
SPEAKER_04: And her purse set it off by one of these devices.
20:24
SPEAKER_04: And they took it out in front of everybody.
20:26
unknown: Oh my god.
20:27
SPEAKER_04: And I was in front of her, and so I'm they're all looking at me.
20:31
SPEAKER_04: They're all looking at me, they're all looking at me like, oh, that's your girlfriend?
20:35
SPEAKER_04: And I'm like, oh no.
20:39
SPEAKER_06: A silver bullet.
20:43
SPEAKER_06: You don't want the floppy plastic bullets.
20:47
SPEAKER_01: Mind it, mind.
20:51
SPEAKER_04: I set things off all the time with my blinking.
20:55
SPEAKER_05: I'm surprised it didn't go off when I blocked her.
21:01
SPEAKER_05: That is a very strange.
21:03
SPEAKER_05: I always, when I have to go to court as a property manager, I have to go to the low-level magic.
21:08
SPEAKER_01: You're always carrying your dildo.
21:11
SPEAKER_05: Leave it in the gold.
21:12
SPEAKER_04: It's my magic wand.
21:14
SPEAKER_05: This is my uh long term.
21:18
SPEAKER_04: This is my this is my rents due.
21:20
SPEAKER_05: You have to take the batteries out beforehand.
21:22
SPEAKER_05: Okay.
21:23
SPEAKER_06: This is my rifle.
21:25
SPEAKER_06: This is my gun.
21:26
SPEAKER_06: Is that a silencer?
21:30
SPEAKER_05: Well, and this this is an interesting turn.
21:32
SPEAKER_05: I cannot believe she did that.
21:34
SPEAKER_04: That is absolutely if you if you had come in contact with her with her, you'd you'd understand.
21:39
SPEAKER_04: You'd be like, oh yeah, of course.
21:41
SPEAKER_05: Oh, yeah.
21:42
SPEAKER_04: This makes sense.
21:42
SPEAKER_04: What's next?
21:47
SPEAKER_05: You don't have to go with your grandmother that much anymore.
21:52
SPEAKER_05: My aunt doesn't get to come to court anymore.
21:57
SPEAKER_05: A suspicious object left outside a Washington, D.C.
22:01
SPEAKER_05: firehouse shut down rush hour traffic and prompted a bomb squad response before being identified as an adult toy.
22:10
SPEAKER_05: Police were called to the station of D.C.
22:13
SPEAKER_05: Fire and EMS on Wisconsin Avenue.
22:16
SPEAKER_05: Of course.
22:18
SPEAKER_05: Of course.
22:18
SPEAKER_05: See, this is where it's getting suspicious, Will.
22:20
SPEAKER_05: I think Trump left uh one of his uh toys out there.
22:25
SPEAKER_05: I know.
22:26
SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
22:26
SPEAKER_05: Milani is starting to do sabotage moves now.
22:29
SPEAKER_05: That's right.
22:30
SPEAKER_05: He for the report of a suspicious electronic device when it with exposed wires.
22:36
SPEAKER_04: Exposed wires?
22:37
SPEAKER_04: What kind of weird kink is that?
22:40
SPEAKER_02: It was used and abused.
22:42
SPEAKER_02: This is like it's like a lucky charm.
22:46
SPEAKER_02: I've just kept this with me my whole life.
22:47
SPEAKER_05: This may have been an older lady.
22:49
SPEAKER_05: This is like a ham radio of mild.
22:51
SPEAKER_06: It doesn't even sound like it had batteries.
22:52
SPEAKER_06: It look like they were too connected to vacuum tube.
23:00
SPEAKER_06: Let me get a real charge.
23:04
SPEAKER_05: It's a crank start.
23:06
SPEAKER_05: It's like an old Harley.
23:09
SPEAKER_05: Start that fucker.
23:12
SPEAKER_05: Crank the thing.
23:13
SPEAKER_05: Plug it in.
23:14
SPEAKER_05: The person who left the object outside the building had reportedly spoken to an employee prior to tossing the device and leaving the scene.
23:22
SPEAKER_05: Traffic was shut down, which you know DC traffic.
23:25
SPEAKER_05: I-95 gets shut down every day over DC traffic.
23:28
SPEAKER_04: I don't even know anything about it.
23:29
SPEAKER_04: But okay.
23:32
SPEAKER_05: I don't know.
23:32
SPEAKER_05: No comment.
23:33
SPEAKER_05: Undisclosed family member.
23:36
SPEAKER_04: Of the Mason Dixons and Offer Me.
23:39
SPEAKER_05: There you go.
23:40
SPEAKER_05: Causing delays to the morning rush, while the police explosive ordnance disposal unit investigated the object.
23:47
SPEAKER_05: A police report identified the device as an electronic sex portable pump device.
23:52
SPEAKER_05: A pump device.
23:54
SPEAKER_05: Oh, this explains the wires.
23:56
SPEAKER_05: How did you know this already, Will?
23:59
SPEAKER_03: What do you do with the wires?
24:00
SPEAKER_03: Is what I want to know.
24:03
SPEAKER_02: It's growing in the shock.
24:05
SPEAKER_01: I guess I have to take it off Facebook Marketplace.
24:09
SPEAKER_06: I'm pussing up myself up and I shock myself for being a bad boy.
24:14
SPEAKER_06: So naughty.
24:15
SPEAKER_05: It's like half Azer.
24:22
SPEAKER_05: Most important.
24:24
SPEAKER_05: Most important, the person who left the device outside the station has not been identified.
24:28
SPEAKER_05: So you're good for now.
24:29
SPEAKER_05: Oh thank God.
24:31
SPEAKER_06: Until the flock cameras spot them.
24:33
SPEAKER_06: Yeah, the flock might get them.
24:36
SPEAKER_06: And you know there's a lot of flock cameras in DC.
24:39
SPEAKER_06: So if they find them within a week.
24:42
SPEAKER_05: Would this be considered finding weapons of ass destruction?
24:50
SPEAKER_04: That is a blow below.
24:52
SPEAKER_04: It's in DC.
24:53
SPEAKER_08: Where's Donald Rum?
24:56
SPEAKER_04: Just throw the midgets in there next.
24:58
SPEAKER_06: I know.
24:59
SPEAKER_08: Throw the midget under the bus.
25:01
SPEAKER_05: That was ChatGPT, so.
25:03
SPEAKER_05: Oh, you they they spit out a one-liner for the thing.
25:06
SPEAKER_03: We're trying to be funny with this.
25:07
SPEAKER_05: This isn't funny.
25:08
SPEAKER_05: This is very serious.
25:09
SPEAKER_05: It's painful.
25:10
SPEAKER_05: There's wires.
25:11
SPEAKER_05: Embarrassing for the embarrassing for the community and the family.
25:16
SPEAKER_05: This is well, speaking of you know, undisclosed things from Wisconsin, especially Florida Steakhouse.
25:25
SPEAKER_05: Florida Steakhouse touts clothing optional nude dining experience.
25:29
SPEAKER_04: This is good.
25:30
SPEAKER_04: See, this is that in that retirement community, the the what is it called?
25:34
SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
25:35
SPEAKER_04: Is that in the villages?
25:36
SPEAKER_05: I'm not sure.
25:36
SPEAKER_05: I'm not seeing the villages.
25:38
SPEAKER_05: We got to look this up.
25:39
SPEAKER_05: Well, this a Florida restaurant is inviting guests to disrobe on the first Monday of every month for a nude dining experience.
25:47
SPEAKER_05: Nude Monday.
25:49
SPEAKER_04: Do you want to sit on those seats on Tuesday?
25:51
SPEAKER_04: Do you think it's a buffet?
25:58
SPEAKER_04: Is there is there a law against this?
26:00
SPEAKER_04: I don't know.
26:00
SPEAKER_04: I mean, in Utah, maybe.
26:02
SPEAKER_04: I guess we do say they have seats.
26:04
SPEAKER_06: I hope so.
26:06
SPEAKER_06: Anything flies in the vote.
26:08
SPEAKER_01: Like, really?
26:09
SPEAKER_01: We don't want skid marks on the sea.
26:11
SPEAKER_01: Who's going to have an appetite if most of the people that you see at the nude beaches?
26:15
SPEAKER_06: Well, I don't agree.
26:18
SPEAKER_05: I don't agree because nothing says fine dining like a ribeye six inches from someone's balls.
26:23
SPEAKER_06: Yeah.
26:23
SPEAKER_05: So you know, people are all yum.
26:26
SPEAKER_06: How's that working with the health department?
26:29
SPEAKER_04: Yeah, there's got to be some serious restrictions and taxes going on here.
26:34
SPEAKER_05: They're not making the food they're still to eat it, but yeah.
26:37
SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
26:38
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, but it's still that's that's contamination, cross-contamination from uh visitors to the restaurants.
26:44
SPEAKER_05: That's what you say.
26:45
SPEAKER_05: That's what you say.
26:45
SPEAKER_05: Others call it a delicious, uh delightful.
26:48
SPEAKER_01: Some of us when we we don't interact with other people that are eating, but you know, it's a Randy thing where he's tasting their food.
26:55
SPEAKER_05: How would you like your meat is now a dangerously open-ended question.
26:59
SPEAKER_05: How would you like your meat?
27:01
SPEAKER_05: Would you like to do that?
27:02
SPEAKER_06: ST only is humping the husband while they're eating.
27:07
SPEAKER_05: This is the only steakhouse where bone in describes half the dining room.
27:12
SPEAKER_01: I needed to throw those in.
27:14
SPEAKER_01: You must have it set on dad jokes.
27:21
SPEAKER_03: Don't criticize my problem.
27:25
SPEAKER_05: Well, it says Do you get a tip with that?
27:28
SPEAKER_02: Just the tip, honey.
27:31
SPEAKER_06: We can't go any further.
27:33
SPEAKER_06: How much should I leave for the tip?
27:35
SPEAKER_06: It's the waitresses naked.
27:36
SPEAKER_06: Are they getting naked?
27:37
SPEAKER_06: No.
27:37
SPEAKER_06: No, the waitresses.
27:38
SPEAKER_06: That's what D-Heck gets them both.
27:42
SPEAKER_04: There's union rules regarding a lot of that.
27:44
SPEAKER_04: There might be.
27:45
SPEAKER_05: This might be some hazard pay, some union rules.
27:47
SPEAKER_04: Over double triple time.
27:49
SPEAKER_01: Give this.
27:50
SPEAKER_01: You're not going to get the attractive people, though, to come in to do this.
27:54
SPEAKER_02: Oh, you never know.
27:55
unknown: You never know.
27:56
SPEAKER_01: Never know until you try.
27:58
SPEAKER_02: That's right.
27:58
SPEAKER_02: You got to let it all hang out.
28:00
SPEAKER_06: Okay.
28:01
SPEAKER_02: It's Florida.
28:02
SPEAKER_02: What do you expect?
28:03
SPEAKER_06: The silver surfers, really?
28:04
SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
28:05
SPEAKER_05: Oh, yeah.
28:05
SPEAKER_05: Can you imagine the mud ass and humidity?
28:10
SPEAKER_06: And the guys.
28:12
SPEAKER_05: They roll up in their fancy golf carts.
28:14
SPEAKER_06: And the guys are diapers.
28:17
SPEAKER_05: A diaper would be more sanitary than probably what's going on here.
28:20
SPEAKER_05: Oh Lord.
28:21
SPEAKER_05: Can you imagine the swamp ass and it's Florida and humid and these old people coming in?
28:29
SPEAKER_05: So you're leaving a little frosting present on the seat for the next customer.
28:34
SPEAKER_01: How do you get into the place?
28:36
SPEAKER_01: You know, did they have like a disrobing room?
28:38
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
28:39
SPEAKER_06: I mean, you have to like walk in.
28:41
SPEAKER_05: You have to be tied into the Florida swinger community to get on a list.
28:45
SPEAKER_05: Darren?
28:46
SPEAKER_04: I don't do anything like that.
28:47
SPEAKER_05: Oh, okay.
28:48
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, right.
28:49
SPEAKER_04: I'm not even I'm not even near Florida.
28:52
SPEAKER_04: Technically.
28:55
SPEAKER_04: Technically, I'm not.
28:56
SPEAKER_04: I'm no.
28:57
SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
28:57
SPEAKER_05: Well, Mirade Ali, chef and owner of Class C-L-A-S-S, Sorre Steakhouse in Hollywood, Florida.
29:05
SPEAKER_05: That's down south of Florida.
29:07
SPEAKER_01: Yep.
29:07
SPEAKER_05: That's where all the 9-11 hijackers were colluding.
29:10
SPEAKER_05: Came up with the idea of the monthly event as a means of attracting attention at the eatery in an unusual way.
29:17
SPEAKER_05: As the restaurant is in this rough environment, we have to be remarkable, and remarkable means people are talking.
29:23
SPEAKER_05: See, this is a stretch.
29:26
SPEAKER_01: Well, he just recently added the C and an L too.
29:29
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I know.
29:32
SPEAKER_04: The southern part ended at Jacksonville.
29:35
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, and then it goes into Latin America.
29:38
SPEAKER_05: I don't know what it goes into, but I'm just the Everglades.
29:41
SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
29:42
SPEAKER_04: It goes off a cliff.
29:43
SPEAKER_05: It's just a bowl of mosquitoes and alligators after that.
29:48
SPEAKER_05: The chef said the servers will remain clothed in their usual dress attire, but they've been trained to be respectful to the unclothed customers.
29:57
SPEAKER_05: I'm the chef and owner, and my crew, we're all professionals.
30:00
SPEAKER_05: Tickets cost 250.
30:03
SPEAKER_05: What?
30:03
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, this is like this is like$250 to what?
30:10
SPEAKER_06: To go to eat naked?
30:12
SPEAKER_01: See, like dried eggs.
30:15
SPEAKER_01: I get at home every night for free.
30:18
SPEAKER_06: So I don't see the what embarrassing myself.
30:22
SPEAKER_06: Without TV camera.
30:23
SPEAKER_01: I still get embarrassed, yeah.
30:26
SPEAKER_01: Just embarrassed for the TV camera.
30:28
SPEAKER_01: Well, every time I run outside to get my mail, you know.
30:34
SPEAKER_05: The neighbors get all weird.
30:35
SPEAKER_05: They're not let me fit the dog anymore.
30:41
SPEAKER_08: Or let the dog beat me.
30:48
SPEAKER_05: They just go in their house when they come out.
30:54
SPEAKER_05: No wonder I'm so popular in the neighborhood.
30:59
SPEAKER_05: They offered to take my garbage up for me now.
31:04
SPEAKER_04: I was saying we could take a field trip down there for this, but it's way too damn expensive.
31:08
SPEAKER_05: I know.
31:11
SPEAKER_05: Arm and a leg just to see a bunch of 70-year-old naked fat men uh leave little uh this one baffles me.
31:19
SPEAKER_01: Now, back in the day, uh years ago, when I was living in uh Clearwater, uh on the other coast in Fort Lauderdale, they had a uh a breakfast donut shop that went topless.
31:34
SPEAKER_01: And it became very popular.
31:36
SPEAKER_01: Really?
31:36
SPEAKER_01: Now that makes sense.
31:38
SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
31:39
SPEAKER_05: Topless is less unsanitary.
31:42
SPEAKER_05: That's also depending on the lactate.
31:45
SPEAKER_01: Plus, it's it's the the women who work there, it's not randos that are coming off the street.
31:49
SPEAKER_01: Oh, well.
31:50
SPEAKER_05: And so once you add the customers being naked and it's a bunch of old guys, it's a wild card.
31:56
SPEAKER_05: That's yeah, you can't unplug it.
31:58
SPEAKER_01: It just changes the whole thing.
31:59
SPEAKER_01: A crapshoot of what you can't unsee.
32:01
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
32:02
SPEAKER_04: It's part of the fun.
32:04
SPEAKER_04: But not at$150.
32:06
SPEAKER_04: That is not fun.
32:07
SPEAKER_04: That's robbery.
32:08
SPEAKER_06: That's when you got to put the bomb goggles on.
32:10
SPEAKER_06: $200.
32:11
SPEAKER_06: Yeah, it's$200.
32:11
SPEAKER_06: $200?
32:12
SPEAKER_06: Yeah, that's the air lady bomb goggles.
32:14
SPEAKER_05: It does say$300 for couples.
32:17
SPEAKER_01: So you can't get a little break.
32:19
SPEAKER_01: There you go.
32:20
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, but we're we're just gonna go in there and dine alone.
32:24
SPEAKER_05: Well, talk about the liability.
32:26
SPEAKER_05: Not only do you have D heck, but they had to put in special rules of not touching another person without consent.
32:32
SPEAKER_05: So that there might be a lot of legal.
32:34
SPEAKER_05: That's a special rule.
32:35
SPEAKER_05: I like that same rule all the time.
32:42
SPEAKER_05: If you have to emphasize it, that means they've may have had some incidents.
32:47
SPEAKER_05: Possibly.
32:48
SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
32:49
SPEAKER_05: Once you walk through the door, I'll most likely be nude, no clothes on.
32:53
SPEAKER_05: So when you come in, you do feel you do feel more comfortable.
32:57
SPEAKER_05: Hostess Toshiba Hart said.
32:59
SPEAKER_05: So this is the hostess talking about all of a sudden she's getting naked too.
33:03
SPEAKER_05: Which does sound more exciting.
33:06
SPEAKER_06: Each of the horses are get are naked.
33:09
SPEAKER_06: Yeah, well, well, this would be like the nudest bar, then.
33:12
SPEAKER_07: Yeah.
33:12
SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
33:13
SPEAKER_05: But you know, now some sweaty, humid Florida ass woman is bringing your food over to you.
33:19
SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
33:19
SPEAKER_05: Each dinner will be given, each uh uh diner will be given a robe, a soft towel, and a seat cover.
33:27
SPEAKER_05: So that that was good.
33:29
SPEAKER_05: Okay, they have to have the disposable seat covers for all the skid marks on the seats.
33:33
SPEAKER_06: No wonder they're charging$300 a couple.
33:37
SPEAKER_06: This is good.
33:38
SPEAKER_06: Take out a laundry pill.
33:39
SPEAKER_05: I know.
33:40
SPEAKER_05: Well, and Joanne uh Hussey, a spokesperson for the city of Hollywood, said new dining experience is perfectly legal and they are just billed as private events.
33:50
SPEAKER_01: Oh Tandy, why does your napkin look like a tent?
33:57
SPEAKER_05: This, I mean, these are a lot of entrepreneurial ideas.
34:00
SPEAKER_05: Every week we bring these really interesting ideas to you, Will.
34:04
SPEAKER_05: We need to set up a the guy who's got the businesses is over here that we can do.
34:09
SPEAKER_01: I know.
34:11
SPEAKER_01: You don't want to do the butt naked swing or any of his businesses do the happy ending?
34:19
SPEAKER_01: I don't see the downside.
34:20
SPEAKER_01: You're an agarist?
34:20
SPEAKER_06: Where's the Dalai Lama?
34:26
SPEAKER_06: That's right.
34:28
SPEAKER_05: That's right.
34:29
SPEAKER_05: Not a Dalai Lama.
34:30
SPEAKER_05: Those are those Tibetans.
34:32
SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
34:35
SPEAKER_01: I just want to go to Darren's businesses and say, um, I want a pedicure and a happy ending.
34:43
SPEAKER_05: And see the lawsuits coming.
34:45
SPEAKER_05: It's not happening.
34:46
SPEAKER_05: They've been trained to prevent this.
34:48
SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
34:48
SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
34:48
SPEAKER_05: They they they've already been dealing with your type, Will.
34:52
SPEAKER_01: We'll be listening, Darren's businesses.
34:56
SPEAKER_05: We will not say or any stage or something.
35:00
SPEAKER_06: Or we're protesting in front of them with a sign saying, We want nakedness.
35:04
SPEAKER_06: We want nakedness.
35:05
SPEAKER_05: We want nakedness.
35:06
SPEAKER_05: We want to do that.
35:07
SPEAKER_05: Well, speaking, yeah, I guess butt-naked people could be considered primates, which would transition to Indonesia traps monkeys to end rampage that wounded 18 people.
35:19
SPEAKER_05: Good.
35:20
SPEAKER_05: Those people become monkey.
35:21
SPEAKER_01: Because of the$250 pay that they're chopping down their damn trees.
35:26
SPEAKER_01: I know.
35:27
SPEAKER_04: Chop down the trees, you're starting a war.
35:29
SPEAKER_01: Why are they trapping these poor monkeys?
35:31
SPEAKER_05: Well, they went on a rampage.
35:33
SPEAKER_05: So there was a little bit of an issue.
35:34
SPEAKER_05: Why?
35:35
SPEAKER_05: Well, the Democrats didn't.
35:36
SPEAKER_05: Why did they go on a rampage?
35:38
SPEAKER_04: Let's go back to it.
35:38
SPEAKER_04: Why did they go on a rampage?
35:39
SPEAKER_04: Well, they don't like dogs, that's for sure.
35:42
SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
35:42
SPEAKER_04: Oh, Indonesia?
35:43
SPEAKER_04: No, the monkeys don't like the dogs.
35:45
SPEAKER_04: Oh.
35:45
SPEAKER_04: They kill them all the time.
35:47
SPEAKER_05: That's interesting.
35:48
SPEAKER_04: Yeah, they don't like it.
35:49
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, monkeys are uh they can be some little bastards, especially baboons.
35:53
SPEAKER_05: Yep.
35:54
SPEAKER_05: Well, we shouldn't talk about our other guests.
35:58
SPEAKER_05: Silverback is not, he's out of state today.
36:00
SPEAKER_05: He cannot come.
36:01
SPEAKER_04: Oh man.
36:02
SPEAKER_04: But why the why did they go on a rampage?
36:05
SPEAKER_04: Why?
36:05
SPEAKER_05: Well, it says long-tailed what is it?
36:09
SPEAKER_05: M-A-C-A-Q-U-E S-KACAC macaque are a common sight in Indonesia, even in urban areas where conflict with humans occurs.
36:22
SPEAKER_05: But animal trappers have cut short short a two-week rampage of a monkey that randomly attacked 18 people on Indonesia's Sumatra Island.
36:32
SPEAKER_05: They deserved it.
36:33
SPEAKER_05: I know prompting dozens of schools to close and fear.
36:38
SPEAKER_05: The animal, an adult long-tailed macaque, macaque, wounded 18 residents.
36:44
SPEAKER_05: Whatever.
36:45
SPEAKER_05: 18.
36:46
SPEAKER_05: Took out 18 people.
36:47
SPEAKER_05: Took out wounded 18 in the town of Tembillahan, biting and clawing at its victims, most of whom it targeted when they were alone.
36:57
SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
36:58
SPEAKER_05: So like a true predator.
37:00
SPEAKER_05: Those hurt included children and elderly people.
37:03
SPEAKER_05: As of today, there were 19 attacks with 18 victims.
37:06
SPEAKER_05: One victim was attacked twice.
37:09
SPEAKER_05: The fire and rescue service said.
37:11
SPEAKER_05: It must have been his perfume.
37:13
SPEAKER_05: I know.
37:14
SPEAKER_04: What set this thing off, man?
37:16
SPEAKER_04: Was it just nuts?
37:17
SPEAKER_05: I mean, it says he this required dozens of stitches, rabies shots.
37:22
SPEAKER_05: It said the monkey was caught thirsty.
37:24
SPEAKER_05: This might have just been Indonesia.
37:25
SPEAKER_05: It might have been just from the jungle.
37:27
SPEAKER_05: He just went into town and we got something.
37:31
SPEAKER_03: But here's a couple, there's a couple of weird things about monkeys.
37:34
SPEAKER_01: Somebody took his cigarettes?
37:35
SPEAKER_01: This is like mini Godzilla.
37:36
SPEAKER_04: There's a couple weird weird things.
37:38
SPEAKER_04: So one monkey did this.
37:40
SPEAKER_04: So they're rounding up all monkeys.
37:43
SPEAKER_04: They're rounding up all the monkeys because one monkey didn't.
37:45
SPEAKER_05: Well, they said trap monkey.
37:46
SPEAKER_05: They might have said uh getting a few of them, but they were mainly concerned about this one.
37:50
SPEAKER_05: Uh Charles Brown.
37:51
SPEAKER_05: So they got this one, but did they trap all the monkey?
37:54
SPEAKER_04: I'm trying to figure this out.
37:55
SPEAKER_04: Is like this a collectivist thing?
37:57
SPEAKER_04: Like one monkey did it, so let's round them all up.
37:59
SPEAKER_05: I think it's one monkey did it, and we need to find this monkey and stop him.
38:05
SPEAKER_01: Okay.
38:06
SPEAKER_01: Okay.
38:06
SPEAKER_01: So arrest them all.
38:08
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
38:08
SPEAKER_01: Sort them out.
38:09
SPEAKER_01: Sort them out later.
38:10
SPEAKER_01: We know you're in there.
38:13
SPEAKER_06: You're meant for questioning.
38:15
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, what are you so mad about there, little guy?
38:20
SPEAKER_01: Fred, are you done with your lunch?
38:21
SPEAKER_01: We want to step have you step in the monkey bin there.
38:24
SPEAKER_01: Trying to identify somebody.
38:28
SPEAKER_05: Well, it says the monkey was caught on Thursday in a trap set in town, and the rescue service issued a video on Friday showing it alive, seemingly stressed in a cage.
38:38
SPEAKER_05: Town official Ari Saria urged residents to remain cautious because the monkey could have operated as part of a gang.
38:46
SPEAKER_05: This is where it ties in.
38:49
SPEAKER_01: This is actually a conspiracy thing.
38:51
SPEAKER_01: We should have had that in the last time.
38:53
SPEAKER_01: I know.
38:53
SPEAKER_06: This is just like uh humans have their own gangs.
38:57
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, it's it's we're we're social primates.
39:00
SPEAKER_05: We have our little social gangs.
39:01
SPEAKER_05: Monkeys do it the original way.
39:04
SPEAKER_05: The concern microphone monkey.
39:05
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, especially with microphone monkey barrel.
39:07
SPEAKER_05: We get together in one room and this gets a little wild.
39:11
SPEAKER_05: The concern is there may be other monkeys attacking people, Ari said on Instagram.
39:16
SPEAKER_05: Forty schools remain closed on Friday with three days of online learning ordered for hundreds of pupils.
39:22
SPEAKER_05: The doors will reopen next Monday if deemed safe.
39:25
SPEAKER_05: Safe, the local uh government said in a statement.
39:28
SPEAKER_05: It said easy food.
39:29
SPEAKER_05: The monkey had been transferred to Pekanbaru, the capital of Sumatra's Ryu province, where the Nature Conservation Agency will carry out blood and observational tests.
39:40
SPEAKER_05: We want to establish whether the monkey is carrying any diseases.
39:43
SPEAKER_05: Human-animal conflicts are common in the vast Southeast Asian archipelago, especially in areas where the clearing of rainforest to make way for palm oil plantations.
39:54
SPEAKER_04: Kind of didn't like that, did it?
39:55
SPEAKER_04: Yeah, they didn't.
39:55
SPEAKER_04: Didn't like its home being chopped down and got a little bit upset, a little defensive.
40:00
SPEAKER_04: Didn't like its property being on my cigarettes.
40:03
SPEAKER_04: Didn't like that.
40:04
SPEAKER_05: This is like eminent domain of the monkey can't be able to do it.
40:08
SPEAKER_04: Don't want you encroaching on me.
40:10
SPEAKER_05: It said by shrinking the habitat for animals such as monkeys, elephants, and tigers, a biology lecturer, Pugie Rianti.
40:18
SPEAKER_05: Not Puj Rianti.
40:19
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, Pujie's back.
40:21
SPEAKER_05: Said some monkeys have also learned to associate humans with food.
40:26
SPEAKER_05: It's not easy to look for food in the forest.
40:27
SPEAKER_05: It's easier to get food from living for uh when the forest is gone.
40:31
SPEAKER_04: It's kind of hard to look for your food.
40:33
SPEAKER_06: The scavenging gets a little more difficult when uh so he's basically pissed off because they took all his woods away.
40:39
SPEAKER_06: Yeah, yeah, basically.
40:40
SPEAKER_06: A little upset.
40:41
SPEAKER_06: Take it to your ass in your own city.
40:43
SPEAKER_04: Wait until they figure out how to use guns.
40:45
SPEAKER_06: I'm not sure if this is like maybe.
40:46
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, exactly.
40:48
SPEAKER_06: This does sound like a lot of things.
40:48
SPEAKER_06: How does this work?
40:49
SPEAKER_06: Boom, bang, bang.
40:51
SPEAKER_03: Oh, you're the guy that did that.
40:53
SPEAKER_05: We have great ideas here.
40:55
SPEAKER_05: I believe this is the mafia Mike Origin story.
41:02
SPEAKER_06: It had to start somewhere.
41:04
SPEAKER_05: After he was kicked out of Sumatra, he went and moved to Connecticut.
41:11
SPEAKER_05: 18-person rampage.
41:14
SPEAKER_04: I mean, this this does happen.
41:16
SPEAKER_04: The elephant ones are the brutal ones.
41:18
SPEAKER_04: Where they just go frickin' bonkers and just mow down whole villages.
41:24
SPEAKER_05: Most damn Republicans.
41:26
SPEAKER_05: I was assuming the tiger might be the biggest threat.
41:29
SPEAKER_04: No, the tigers are kind of I mean, the tigers will maul and attack people and they do that.
41:35
SPEAKER_04: They don't take a whole frickin' village out.
41:37
SPEAKER_06: They don't, hey, if you're if you weigh 10 tons and walk around with an attitude, just I think who's gonna stop me.
41:46
SPEAKER_04: I think there was one recent recently in India.
41:49
SPEAKER_04: In India, there was one recently where I think they killed its calf, its baby.
41:54
SPEAKER_04: Oh, and he went full.
41:57
SPEAKER_04: That'll set the mowed down multiple villages.
42:00
SPEAKER_04: I don't know the outcome of this.
42:02
SPEAKER_04: It was like really bad, but like the footage, you can look at the footage online, and these people are on roofs, yeah, like in a state of panic.
42:09
SPEAKER_01: Don't screw with moms.
42:13
SPEAKER_05: That is like Indian Godzilla.
42:15
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, the elephant comes and just start squishing the town down.
42:19
SPEAKER_04: Yeah, it just went.
42:21
SPEAKER_05: You can't stop them.
42:22
SPEAKER_05: Tigers are also huge.
42:24
SPEAKER_05: They're like way bigger than lions.
42:26
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, they're like the most dominant feline on the planet.
42:30
SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
42:30
SPEAKER_05: And they're all over Southeast Asia.
42:32
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, they are.
42:32
SPEAKER_05: They're all over and probably India.
42:34
SPEAKER_01: I saw some cougars at uh that Annie's beach.
42:40
SPEAKER_05: Uh is this part of the uh swinger thing?
42:42
SPEAKER_05: No, maybe what cougars were you seeing?
42:46
SPEAKER_04: They were scary cougars.
42:48
SPEAKER_04: Really scary.
42:49
SPEAKER_04: They were without their vodka.
42:51
SPEAKER_04: Is that what you're saying?
42:51
SPEAKER_04: No.
42:52
SPEAKER_05: They had some strange aerodynamics.
42:54
SPEAKER_01: I felt bad for the 20-year-old guys who were hanging out there because it, you know, they're gonna get mauled.
42:59
SPEAKER_01: Everybody's got a got a job to do.
43:02
SPEAKER_01: That's right.
43:02
SPEAKER_05: Another village destruction horror story.
43:04
SPEAKER_01: Here comes another 50-year-old woman.
43:07
SPEAKER_01: Divorce.
43:09
SPEAKER_04: I ran into that in the supermarket the other day, shopping for my mom.
43:12
SPEAKER_04: Oh yeah?
43:13
SPEAKER_04: I got confused about like you normally get your your uh melon cut up, right?
43:19
SPEAKER_04: Like it's cut up, and my mom was like, I need a melon, right?
43:22
SPEAKER_04: Like, and she needed a water.
43:24
SPEAKER_04: Oh, I what kind of melon?
43:25
SPEAKER_04: The orange ones, what is it?
43:27
SPEAKER_08: Cantaloupe.
43:27
SPEAKER_04: She needed a cantaloupe.
43:29
SPEAKER_04: And normally I get them cut up.
43:30
SPEAKER_04: So I'm I'm gonna buy uh this melon, and I can't tell if it's a cantaloupe or a melon.
43:35
SPEAKER_04: I decided to ask this lady, and that was a big mistake.
43:38
SPEAKER_05: Unsuspecting Darren.
43:40
SPEAKER_04: Dude, I just did not see it coming.
43:42
SPEAKER_04: I'm like, oh no.
43:43
SPEAKER_04: And she's just engaging with a cougar here in the supermarket.
43:48
SPEAKER_04: You know, she's just growling.
43:49
SPEAKER_04: She's like, Where are you going?
43:50
SPEAKER_04: I'm like, I gotta go.
43:52
SPEAKER_04: I'm like, I'm out of here with my cart.
43:54
SPEAKER_04: I've got a whole list.
43:56
SPEAKER_04: Here, come back.
43:57
SPEAKER_04: She was kind of like that.
43:58
SPEAKER_04: It was like, wait, we can talk about this more.
44:01
SPEAKER_04: I'm like, I don't need to.
44:02
SPEAKER_04: I I'm just gonna buy it.
44:03
SPEAKER_04: It says melons, I'm buying.
44:06
SPEAKER_05: I'll show you the difference.
44:08
SPEAKER_05: Come feel mine.
44:09
SPEAKER_05: Feel the aerodynamics.
44:11
SPEAKER_05: I'll pull them off the floor and show you.
44:12
SPEAKER_04: Oh, brother.
44:14
SPEAKER_04: She was friendly, but a little bit, it was too much.
44:16
SPEAKER_04: Oh, yes.
44:17
SPEAKER_04: For me, I don't need I can't handle that.
44:18
SPEAKER_05: We have to be careful with Darren because this is like wandering in the woods.
44:23
SPEAKER_06: Was that on a Tuesday where all the old people go shopping?
44:26
SPEAKER_06: Can't remember.
44:28
SPEAKER_06: Oh, is that the uh I think that's the is that the day that you're supposed to go?
44:33
SPEAKER_05: Tuesday?
44:33
SPEAKER_05: Tuesday.
44:34
SPEAKER_05: It's part of the Ory County retirement schedule.
44:37
SPEAKER_05: I don't know.
44:38
SPEAKER_00: They set out the brazing stations.
44:42
SPEAKER_04: I usually don't do the food lion thing either.
44:44
SPEAKER_04: I don't know.
44:45
SPEAKER_05: Costco.
44:46
SPEAKER_05: I I can't stand food line.
44:47
SPEAKER_04: I can't stand it either.
44:48
SPEAKER_06: Yeah, when they when they bust out the sample, you bust your ass right out the door.
44:53
SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
44:54
SPEAKER_04: So I was out of my element to begin with at food line.
44:57
SPEAKER_06: Yeah, and you're gonna get the uh part it was food line.
44:59
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, the cougars are just there just hunting and preying on.
45:06
SPEAKER_01: I don't know.
45:06
SPEAKER_01: There's gotta be another name for if if this woman's older than we are, it's that's beyond that's a super line.
45:16
SPEAKER_01: I don't know what I call it.
45:18
SPEAKER_04: I guess I don't call it cougar.
45:19
SPEAKER_06: I mean I was Lee.
45:20
SPEAKER_04: It would be probably wasn't that much older than me, but it was still shocking to me because I just didn't see it coming.
45:26
SPEAKER_06: Like all models walking in there.
45:31
SPEAKER_06: Publix all the public.
45:32
SPEAKER_06: Oh yeah, public fancy.
45:34
SPEAKER_01: You're so silly.
45:35
SPEAKER_01: You know the strippers go to Publix.
45:41
SPEAKER_04: I know where everything is in Publix, and I can just one, two, three, four, and I'm out.
45:45
SPEAKER_04: I'm like, I love you here.
45:46
SPEAKER_04: Lowe's foods.
45:47
SPEAKER_05: Love it.
45:47
SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
45:48
SPEAKER_05: Lowe's foods.
45:49
SPEAKER_05: Lows to the number top.
45:51
SPEAKER_04: Really, they don't have enough of anything.
45:52
SPEAKER_04: It's like the bear, the bear and drinking.
45:56
SPEAKER_04: Yeah, they're all drinking in there.
45:58
SPEAKER_06: They're all alcohol.
46:00
SPEAKER_04: I go in there and they're like, oh, is the goat.
46:05
SPEAKER_05: Aldi's.
46:06
SPEAKER_05: Okay, let's be real.
46:08
SPEAKER_05: And you get to see crazy people.
46:11
SPEAKER_06: I wouldn't need anything out of the city.
46:12
SPEAKER_06: Again, Aldi's you gotta put the quarter to get your grocery cart.
46:15
SPEAKER_04: Nuclear.
46:16
SPEAKER_06: Eat that rubber chicken.
46:17
SPEAKER_01: They don't have any bags.
46:18
SPEAKER_01: You have to have your own bags.
46:19
SPEAKER_04: You gotta have your own bags where they make you pay for the bags, and then I don't even know.
46:22
SPEAKER_04: I'm like, how many bags do I need?
46:24
SPEAKER_01: That's a California.
46:26
SPEAKER_04: But you don't mind of California.
46:28
SPEAKER_04: I don't know what the hell it is.
46:31
SPEAKER_01: What's it?
46:32
SPEAKER_01: Red Bull?
46:33
SPEAKER_01: I told them that if they went to Aldi's, there's this Red Thunder or something like that.
46:38
SPEAKER_01: I said, check that out.
46:40
SPEAKER_01: It's about one-third the price of a Red Bull.
46:43
SPEAKER_01: But you can tell it comes right out of the same factory in the same way.
46:46
SPEAKER_01: Oh, really?
46:47
SPEAKER_05: I thought that was some sort of wine box.
46:48
SPEAKER_05: You were talking about stuff.
46:49
SPEAKER_05: Oh no, that's Red Thunder.
46:51
SPEAKER_04: I thought we were going back to Lowe's again where they're all drinking.
46:54
SPEAKER_01: But the Cougars.
46:55
SPEAKER_01: But they did Aldi's does that with these really high-end name brand stuff.
47:00
SPEAKER_01: And you get it for like a third of the price of what they it is interesting.
47:04
SPEAKER_01: You could also bring it to the next level and go to Ollie's.
47:10
SPEAKER_01: Ollie's is not known for their high-end spec for things that fell out of the shipping truck.
47:18
SPEAKER_05: Oh, yeah.
47:18
SPEAKER_01: Well, I do, I do, actually, I do buy some stuff from Ollie's.
47:22
SPEAKER_01: I'm part of Ollie's army or whatever they call that.
47:25
SPEAKER_01: Uh, but these um another primate gang?
47:29
SPEAKER_01: Well, those little things that that are the diffusers, the diffusers you have for late fence that you plug in.
47:36
SPEAKER_04: That's chemical warfare, man.
47:37
SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
47:38
SPEAKER_04: What the hell are you gonna hail?
47:39
SPEAKER_04: Cheaper chemicals.
47:40
SPEAKER_04: Don't do it.
47:41
SPEAKER_04: Aaron hailing it right now.
47:42
SPEAKER_04: Don't do it.
47:43
SPEAKER_04: Don't do it.
47:44
SPEAKER_04: Aaron just toxic poisonous toxic syndrome.
48:00
SPEAKER_04: Toxin the chemicals.
48:02
SPEAKER_02: Have some chemicals with that.
48:08
SPEAKER_01: Should I turn this off?
48:10
SPEAKER_01: Is it gonna get good?
48:11
SPEAKER_01: Are they gonna stop talking about parts?
48:13
SPEAKER_01: You know, this is what people like.
48:15
SPEAKER_01: This is what they're like.
48:17
SPEAKER_04: I still don't like the fact that you're poison enough.
48:20
SPEAKER_04: Well, you know, this is low-grade.
48:22
SPEAKER_04: I get the monkeys attacking.
48:23
SPEAKER_04: I get the monkeys attacking, I'd attack too, but the chemical warfare in your home?
48:27
SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
48:28
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, that's great.
48:28
SPEAKER_05: Darren just cuts a watermelon in half and and puts a uh a Buddhist uh or a Hindu you know, seasoning salt.
48:37
SPEAKER_04: It's all the same, you know.
48:38
SPEAKER_05: That is that would be much healthier.
48:41
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, yeah.
48:42
SPEAKER_05: Will's doing like agent orange light on us.
48:47
SPEAKER_01: Hey, better light through chemistry, man.
48:51
SPEAKER_05: Well, speaking of some of these off-the-wall grocery stores, uh huh.
48:55
SPEAKER_05: North Korea does things a little different.
48:58
SPEAKER_05: So North Korea urged to beat heat with dog meat soup.
49:04
SPEAKER_05: Ooh, didn't they just stop the dogs thing there?
49:08
SPEAKER_05: I don't know if it ever ended in North Korea.
49:10
SPEAKER_04: Oh, North Korea.
49:11
SPEAKER_04: North Korea.
49:12
SPEAKER_04: South Korea, I think it ended.
49:13
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, South Korea they have all these laws and rules and stuff.
49:15
SPEAKER_04: Yeah, they got rules now about.
49:16
SPEAKER_05: I want the cali cauliflower soup, please.
49:19
SPEAKER_04: So they're eating dog up there in North Korea.
49:21
SPEAKER_04: Well, it's to cool them off.
49:22
SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
49:22
SPEAKER_04: Cool them off.
49:23
SPEAKER_05: Because nothing cools you off like a bowl of uh golden retriever.
49:26
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, what that kind of has.
49:29
SPEAKER_05: Husky and green bean.
49:31
SPEAKER_05: Well, Christopher Hitchens went to North Korea a few times, and he said they basically openly state as official party business that the Supreme Leader can time travel and he can, you know, he can't be killed and he's like a deity and this sort of thing.
49:48
SPEAKER_05: And they they decided using their supreme logic that everyone's hot, so the best thing to do would just be to eat dog.
49:57
SPEAKER_01: That'll cool them off.
49:58
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, that'll cool you down.
49:59
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, have this makes no sense.
50:01
SPEAKER_05: It does.
50:01
SPEAKER_01: Well, it doesn't address the the incredible amount of poverty and starvation they have, so it's it's really the heat that we're trying to address.
50:09
SPEAKER_05: Well, they're pres they're hoarding their own food right in their own house.
50:12
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
50:13
SPEAKER_05: We can't accept that.
50:14
SPEAKER_05: This is North Korea.
50:15
SPEAKER_05: We're in a communist republic.
50:16
SPEAKER_05: That's not a pet.
50:17
SPEAKER_01: That's tomorrow's lunch.
50:19
unknown: Yeah.
50:20
SPEAKER_05: Don't pet the meal.
50:22
SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
50:23
SPEAKER_05: As the Korean peninsula swelters with a heat wave, North Korean state media has touted everything from dog meat soup and chicken broth as a way to cope while portraying Kim Jong-un as the leader who endures harsh conditions alongside his people.
50:39
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
50:40
SPEAKER_01: So I'm sure he sets down his caviar and goes, I'm with you.
50:45
SPEAKER_05: Put the lobster down.
50:49
SPEAKER_05: State television reported on Thursday the temperature hit 36 degrees Celsius, which is 91, 98.1 Fahrenheit, in Pyongyang, the highest sense weather recordings began in their capital.
51:02
SPEAKER_05: With the accompanying string of tropical nights, state media has devoted unusual attention to the hottest weeks of the year, known locally as sambok or the dog days of summer.
51:13
SPEAKER_05: That's it.
51:16
SPEAKER_03: It gives a new meaning.
51:18
SPEAKER_03: That makes sense.
51:19
SPEAKER_03: It's all coming together now.
51:21
SPEAKER_03: Have your dog during the dog days.
51:23
SPEAKER_03: You're gonna love this.
51:25
SPEAKER_03: We got chihuahua.
51:26
SPEAKER_01: What's for lunch?
51:27
SPEAKER_01: Hot dogs.
51:30
SPEAKER_05: Cool you're right down.
51:32
SPEAKER_05: New brand of hot dogs.
51:34
SPEAKER_05: Uh so it said during these tropical nights, among the eye-catching recommendations are dog meat soup, reflecting a traditional belief it helps people with sand summer heat.
51:45
SPEAKER_05: So I don't know what biology or physics they're using, but uh in a health feature published on August 2nd, the ruling party newspaper Rodong Sin Mom.
51:56
SPEAKER_03: These are real.
51:57
SPEAKER_03: Rodong Sing Dong.
51:59
SPEAKER_05: Listen, Rodong, quoted a doctor in Pyongyang General Hospital recommending cooling foods such as watermelon cucumbers and mmung beans, as well as nutritional foods, including dog meat soup, fish porridge, and red bean porridge.
52:13
SPEAKER_05: So, you know, you mix it in with the with the cool watermelon and the dog soup.
52:18
SPEAKER_05: There you go.
52:19
SPEAKER_05: It devoted a separate feature to dog meat soup, describing it as a traditional summertime food and reviving an old saying that even if dog meat soup spills on the top of your foot during the dog days of summer, it becomes medicine.
52:37
SPEAKER_01: And this brings together foot juice.
52:39
SPEAKER_05: It does.
52:40
SPEAKER_05: This is a new level of Asian foot juice.
52:43
SPEAKER_05: I would like the Alyssa Lu foot juice, not the North Korean dog foot juice.
52:50
SPEAKER_06: Dog soup foot juice.
53:00
SPEAKER_04: This level of propaganda will get them crossing the border to look for dogs.
53:04
SPEAKER_04: That's right.
53:06
SPEAKER_02: They've got more of them down in the south.
53:10
SPEAKER_05: He is, he did say, um dog meat cooking competitions had been held earlier in the year.
53:18
SPEAKER_05: And Korea's Central News Agency praised Sengitang, a chicken soup stuffed with ginseng, glutinous rice, and jujubes, reporting Pyongyang restaurants were attracting customers seeking this along with their dog soup.
53:35
SPEAKER_05: So this is uh this is just an interesting animal angle.
53:39
SPEAKER_05: We've had wild monkeys running through Indonesia, yeah, taking down full villages as like they're an elephant in India.
53:46
SPEAKER_05: And now we have, you know, dog soup.
53:49
SPEAKER_03: So I guess the uh they're into some weird stuff over there, they really are.
53:53
SPEAKER_03: You think so?
53:54
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, they're in this weird like 1984 instruction manual.
53:59
SPEAKER_04: There was an announcement though that they're trying to end the war officially, north and south.
54:04
SPEAKER_04: Like officially end the war.
54:06
SPEAKER_04: Well, this is the one.
54:09
SPEAKER_05: It might.
54:10
SPEAKER_05: It might, especially with Americans.
54:12
SPEAKER_05: They love dogs here.
54:13
SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
54:13
SPEAKER_06: And that that might be a target for the Americans to start a war over there.
54:18
SPEAKER_06: Well, and here's the thing.
54:22
SPEAKER_05: Well, the Korean bars.
54:24
SPEAKER_05: I think that's more of a just peace, you know, gesture.
54:29
SPEAKER_05: Oh, it's a peace.
54:30
SPEAKER_05: Even though they're technically been at war for 70 years since the Korean War ended.
54:36
SPEAKER_05: Well, they want like just like uh United Ireland, they want United Korea.
54:41
SPEAKER_05: Where its north and south form into one unit.
54:44
SPEAKER_05: That's North Korea's long-term goal.
54:46
SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
54:46
SPEAKER_05: Okay.
54:47
SPEAKER_05: They don't seem too compatible.
54:49
SPEAKER_05: Not at the moment, no.
54:50
SPEAKER_05: No.
54:51
SPEAKER_05: But you know, what we shall see.
54:53
SPEAKER_05: But I just thought that that was a nice way to, you know, we talked about booby aerodynamics, we talked about nude restaurants.
55:01
SPEAKER_05: I thought the uh North Korean dog soup, super cougars, and that wasn't even on the list.
55:07
SPEAKER_05: That's that's just who Darren runs into at Foodline.
55:09
SPEAKER_04: I got lucky that one day.
55:11
SPEAKER_04: I actually talked to a human, and that's what happened.
55:14
SPEAKER_04: I'm like, oh, wait a minute.
55:15
SPEAKER_06: That wasn't a actual human to your liking?
55:18
SPEAKER_04: Yeah, I don't know.
55:24
SPEAKER_01: Somebody took care of his cucumber.
55:27
SPEAKER_05: Okay.
55:28
SPEAKER_05: That was Darren language for now.
55:37
SPEAKER_04: This is a good idea speaking to humans.
55:41
SPEAKER_05: Let's try it out, and you got hunted down almost like the people in Indonesia with the monkey.
55:45
SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
55:45
SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
55:46
SPEAKER_05: But this this was a human cougar monkey.
55:54
SPEAKER_05: See, that that was a nice end.
55:56
SPEAKER_05: I just coughed on my nicotine took the microphone.
55:59
SPEAKER_01: Have another cigarette.
56:01
SPEAKER_01: One of the nicotine pills comes shooting out like a bullet.
56:05
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
56:06
SPEAKER_01: What about our sponsors?
56:07
SPEAKER_01: What about uh you mean our our you you want me to talk about Rebel Rabbit?
56:14
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, there you go.
56:15
SPEAKER_01: Rebel Rabbit high seltzer?
56:17
SPEAKER_08: Yeah.
56:17
SPEAKER_01: Oh, well, I'll tell you what.
56:18
SPEAKER_01: Uh lately, I have been getting out so much in samples.
56:24
SPEAKER_01: People love it.
56:25
SPEAKER_01: And and Mafia Mike and I went for cigars after his uh premiere recording.
56:33
SPEAKER_01: We went to White Ash Cigar.
56:35
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
56:35
SPEAKER_01: Of the shakedown.
56:36
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
56:37
SPEAKER_01: And we went to White Ash Cigar, and uh Dean, the owner, was there, and he was sharing stories about uh they have Rebel Rabbit there and uh some of the guys and their misadventures after having some Rebel Rabbit.
56:50
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
56:51
SPEAKER_05: I could see some misadventures.
56:53
SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
56:54
SPEAKER_01: Oh yeah.
56:54
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
56:55
SPEAKER_01: We we actually ran into one of the guys.
56:58
SPEAKER_01: Um he would have been perfect for our poster because he was flipping the bird to everybody.
57:02
SPEAKER_01: Um it was it was excellent, but uh yeah, Rebel Rabbit's catching on.
57:08
SPEAKER_01: Uh more and more people are are are uh tasting it and and finding out uh the wonderful effects that it has and doesn't have the hangover, won't damage the liver.
57:18
SPEAKER_01: So uh great stuff, great stuff.
57:21
SPEAKER_05: Um if you want a natural alternative for the dog days of summer, yeah, you can have a uh uh topsicle pop, rocket pop, uh T H C drink.
57:31
SPEAKER_01: Another thing that's uh coming along, um of course is we're gonna be uh talking about Zoom and Plur.
57:37
SPEAKER_01: And uh spelled X-U-M.
57:40
SPEAKER_01: X-U-M and uh Plur is P L U R.
57:43
SPEAKER_01: And uh the uh I I've got the tomorrow I'll be getting our samples in.
57:50
SPEAKER_04: Okay.
57:50
SPEAKER_01: So any of you guys are ready to uh uh experiment, expand the minds, play with this a little bit, let me know, and we're going to get behind the microphones, describe what's going on.
58:04
SPEAKER_05: Um Will is insisting this is recorded, and I love the idea.
58:08
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, and and let's uh As a matter of fact, uh I know we're gonna probably run a little long, but I have uh a sample of the um uh this is just a precursor.
58:20
SPEAKER_01: I haven't gotten the uh the go-ahead from Ovins or anybody else to uh to be running um this little uh commercial that we put together.
58:30
SPEAKER_01: But you're a rebel.
58:31
SPEAKER_01: This is I'm a rebel, but uh yeah, because I'm gonna find out we probably have to have some disclaimers or something that I've got to roll after it.
58:39
SPEAKER_01: We'll do some pre-disclaimers right now.
58:41
SPEAKER_01: This is what it sounds like.
58:43
SPEAKER_01: Um exploring skydiving, long wilderness hiking trails, scuba diving, surfing, or taking up MME fighting not in the cards right now.
59:13
SPEAKER_01: Inner explorer, that thrill seeker inside you is still very much alive and chicken.
59:19
SPEAKER_01: How about exploring your mind experiences instead with the products like Zoom or Plural from zoom trip.com.
59:30
SPEAKER_01: That's xumtrip.com.
59:33
SPEAKER_01: Look, we get it, but not everyone has the time, energy, or desire to jump out of a perfectly good airplane or wrestle someone in a cage just to feel something exciting.
59:45
SPEAKER_01: Sometimes the best journey is the one you take right from the comfort of your own space.
59:51
SPEAKER_01: Whether you're looking to elevate your vibe, kick back, or discover a whole new level of relaxation and perception that XUM Trip has you covered.
1:00:04
SPEAKER_01: Skip the parachute, leave the surfboard in the garage, and dive into an unforgettable experience instead.
1:00:12
SPEAKER_01: Head over to xumtrip.com today.
1:00:17
SPEAKER_01: Head over to xumtrip.com today and unleash your inner traveler.
1:00:23
SPEAKER_01: No gear, no training, no physical exertion required.
1:00:29
SPEAKER_01: Xumtrip.com.
1:00:32
SPEAKER_01: Explore beyond the physical.
1:00:36
SPEAKER_05: Dive into the couch.
1:00:40
SPEAKER_05: It has a very Jefferson airplane uh.
1:00:44
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, it was uh I pretty much told the robots that we wanted to have a um uh psychedelic rock feel to it.
1:00:54
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
1:00:55
SPEAKER_05: Beautiful.
1:00:55
SPEAKER_05: So skip the parachute, skip jumping out of planes, just sit on the floor and go into space right from your living room.
1:01:03
SPEAKER_01: Exactly, exactly.
1:01:05
SPEAKER_01: So hopefully uh yeah, we'll hear back and uh be able to run these as pod rolls and um on our radio station.
1:01:13
SPEAKER_01: Beautiful.
1:01:14
SPEAKER_01: That's two cool ass companies now.
1:01:18
SPEAKER_01: Exactly, exactly.
1:01:19
SPEAKER_01: And if more people, cool ass people want to join in, get a hold of us here at Liberty Crack Media.
1:01:26
SPEAKER_01: We'll be happy to uh find out if your products and services fit our uh our vibe.
1:01:34
SPEAKER_05: Our vibe.
1:01:34
SPEAKER_05: Do they still have the bunny ranch in Nevada?
1:01:37
SPEAKER_05: They do.
1:01:37
SPEAKER_05: We need to reach re reach out in many ways.
1:01:40
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, and get but it was the chicken ranch that I actually did the tour for uh in Perump.
1:01:47
SPEAKER_01: Is this in Mexico?
1:01:49
SPEAKER_01: Perump is the city in Nevada, outside of Las Vegas, where all these places are located, because you cannot be in Las Vegas.
1:01:58
SPEAKER_01: Oh, that's right.
1:01:59
SPEAKER_01: So you drive out to Perump, which is up in the mountains, and and they've got the the chicken ranch, the bunny ranch, and a bunch of other places that are out there.
1:02:08
SPEAKER_05: See, we always have business opportunities and ideas on this show.
1:02:12
SPEAKER_05: Amen.
1:02:13
SPEAKER_05: Amen.
1:02:14
SPEAKER_05: But I think this has been a two, this was a back-to-back conspiracy podcast solid hour, and then full monkey uh full monkey barrel show.
1:02:25
SPEAKER_06: It's just a lot of monkey business going on around here.
1:02:28
SPEAKER_06: Nothing but monkey business.
1:02:30
SPEAKER_00: All right, folks.
1:02:31
SPEAKER_00: We'll tune in next week because we're gonna have some more weird, wonderful, and wild times coming out with Michael Barrel.
1:02:38
SPEAKER_00: Stay bye, monkeys.