Latest / Brooke and Jeffrey: Phone Taps / Phone Tap: Slice Finder
Transcript
- 0:00Speaker 1: It is time for your prank phone call. It's Brooke
- 0:01Speaker 1: and Jeffrey in the morning. And in the world we
- 0:03Speaker 1: live in today, it's ever-changing. Literally anybody can create some
- 0:09Speaker 1: business and be a millionaire by next Tuesday. Yeah!
- 0:13Speaker 2: Why can't it be us?
- 0:14Speaker 1: Just look at our technical director, Ashton. Our producer has
- 0:18Speaker 1: given him multiple opportunities to make chump change off of
- 0:22Speaker 1: AI slop. and Ashton refuses to do it and exploit
- 0:27Speaker 1: people for their money. You're absolutely correct. Yeah, he would
- 0:30Speaker 1: rather live with his parents at home and eat a
- 0:33Speaker 1: big bowl of shit every single day. That's his choice. Well,
- 0:38Speaker 1: I am happy to announce not everyone is as soft
- 0:41Speaker 1: as Ashton is. Some people are actually willing to take
- 0:45Speaker 1: advantage of the golden opportunities presented to them. Doesn't that
- 0:50Speaker 1: make Ashton stronger? Absolutely not.
- 0:52Speaker 2: Oh, Ashton.
- 0:54Speaker 1: Weakness will not stand on this show. We are going
- 0:57Speaker 1: to take advantage of people and make it a business
- 0:59Speaker 1: like the guy you're about to hear in your phone
- 1:02Speaker 1: tap right now.
- 1:04Speaker 2: Brooke and Jeffrey's phone taps on the 20s.
- 1:06Speaker 3: Hi, this.
- 1:08Speaker 2: Is Amy. Hi.
- 1:11Speaker 1: I'm calling from Slice Finder.
- 1:13Speaker 2: From Slice what?
- 1:16Speaker 1: Slice Finder. Is this Amy from Human Resources?
- 1:22Speaker 2: Yes, it is. And you are?
- 1:25Speaker 1: My name is Rob. I'm a triple gold star member
- 1:29Speaker 1: on Slice Finder. Okay.
- 1:31Speaker 3: Hi, Rob. I'm sorry, you keep saying Slice Finder, and
- 1:34Speaker 3: I don't know what you're referring to.
- 1:36Speaker 1: Well, it's just because your business was just highlighted about
- 1:40Speaker 1: like 30 seconds ago on the app.
- 1:43Speaker 2: I'm sorry, again, I don't know what Slice Finder is.
- 1:46Speaker 1: It's pretty cool. If a business ever has a pizza
- 1:49Speaker 1: party or a work lunch or something, and they can't
- 1:52Speaker 1: finish all of it, one of the attendees can post
- 1:56Speaker 1: it on Slice Finder, and then me and a few
- 1:59Speaker 1: friends will show up to eat the rest of your
- 2:01Speaker 1: leftover pizza.
- 2:05Speaker 2: What? That's a thing? Yeah.
- 2:07Speaker 1: Yeah. And actually, according to the app right now, it
- 2:11Speaker 1: says there's a half-eaten Canadian bacon pineapple medium in the
- 2:16Speaker 1: break room of your office.
- 2:18Speaker 2: Okay, yes.
- 2:20Speaker 1: And it said that if we came by, we could
- 2:22Speaker 1: help ourselves to the ranch in the fridge.
- 2:25Speaker 2: No, I'm sorry.
- 2:26Speaker 3: This is what pizza was provided for employees in the
- 2:30Speaker 3: break room as a courtesy.
- 2:32Speaker 2: That is something that we provided for them.
- 2:34Speaker 3: There is No entitlement to any outside people, regardless of
- 2:38Speaker 3: if any of our employees are a member of your platform.
- 2:41Speaker 1: Well, you just sound like a total hater. But I'm
- 2:44Speaker 1: just going to tell you the perks and why you
- 2:46Speaker 1: should allow this. Because we'll even eat half-eaten pizza slices.
- 2:51Speaker 2: What?
- 2:51Speaker 1: Like, let's say somebody goes, like, a quarter in on
- 2:54Speaker 1: the slice. I'll polish that off for you.
- 2:57Speaker 2: Yeah, Rob, that's disgusting. And you don't even work here. Oh, okay, right.
- 3:02Speaker 1: I think I see what's going on. If you're worried about, like,
- 3:05Speaker 1: the image of how it's going to look for your company.
- 3:08Speaker 2: No.
- 3:09Speaker 1: We wear business suits.
- 3:10Speaker 2: Stop.
- 3:10Speaker 1: So other people in the building won't know that we're
- 3:12Speaker 1: only there for the za.
- 3:13Speaker 2: I'm sorry, the za?
- 3:15Speaker 1: I mean, that's just the slang that we use because,
- 3:18Speaker 1: you know, if you were a Slice Finder Gold member
- 3:21Speaker 1: like me, you'd use it too.
- 3:24Speaker 3: Okay, Rob, I appreciate you being a gold star member
- 3:28Speaker 3: of this platform.
- 3:29Speaker 1: Well, thank you very much.
- 3:30Speaker 2: You don't even work here. You won't even make it
- 3:33Speaker 2: past security. So, again, if there's any way that you can.
- 3:36Speaker 1: Did you say security? Because I think I know some
- 3:40Speaker 1: of the security people that work there. They're slice finders, too.
- 3:44Speaker 3: Okay, well, if they are employed by the building, then
- 3:48Speaker 3: they are entitled to whatever leftover pizza is in the
- 3:50Speaker 3: break room.
- 3:51Speaker 2: You, however, are not, Rob.
- 3:53Speaker 1: Okay, do you think that's kind of racist?
- 3:56Speaker 2: No.
- 3:58Speaker 1: You had to think about whether it was or wasn't.
- 4:02Speaker 3: I'm thinking that I don't know how race could possibly be.
- 4:06Speaker 1: No, listen to me. It's Zazist. It's racist against Zaw lovers.
- 4:12Speaker 3: I'm sorry, you do understand that this is the human
- 4:14Speaker 3: resources line, okay?
- 4:15Speaker 2: Pizza, the last I checked, is not a human, okay?
- 4:18Speaker 3: It might be a resource, but it's not one that
- 4:20Speaker 3: I deal with, and so I'm going to need to
- 4:22Speaker 3: end this call, and I'm going to wish you your best.
- 4:24Speaker 1: Well, before you make any type of crazy, rash decisions...
- 4:28Speaker 1: I've already made those, Rob. Well, I really, really don't
- 4:32Speaker 1: think you want your business downgraded on Slice Finder.
- 4:36Speaker 3: I would like my business removed entirely from Slice.
- 4:38Speaker 2: Finder, in fact.
- 4:39Speaker 1: That's not an option. And honestly, I'm looking at the
- 4:42Speaker 1: comments for your company right now on the app. There's
- 4:46Speaker 1: one from 2023 that says you were extremely welcoming.
- 4:50Speaker 2: I was not here in 2023. I was not a
- 4:54Speaker 2: member of this company.
- 4:55Speaker 1: You know, can I just tell you, even though you
- 4:58Speaker 1: talk a lot and you're kind of mean, I like you.
- 5:02Speaker 2: The feeling is not mutual. I don't like you.
- 5:06Speaker 3: I don't understand the purpose of this call other than
- 5:09Speaker 3: to possibly infuriate me.
- 5:11Speaker 1: It's funny you say that because that actually was the
- 5:14Speaker 1: entire purpose of me making this phone call in the
- 5:16Speaker 1: first place. Your coworker Camille is going to be really
- 5:20Speaker 1: happy when she hears this.
- 5:22Speaker 2: Is Camille the one who signed us up for this?
- 5:25Speaker 1: Well, yeah, not to slice find her. That's a made
- 5:27Speaker 1: up thing. She signed you up for this prank phone
- 5:29Speaker 1: call on the radio.
- 5:35Speaker 2: Wait, from the radio?
- 5:36Speaker 1: Yeah, my real name is actually Jeff from the show
- 5:38Speaker 1: Brooke and Jeffrey in the Morning.
- 5:40Speaker 2: Okay, this is absolutely insane. That makes a lot of sense.
- 5:45Speaker 1: No, what's insane is how Zazist you are being, Amy.
- 5:49Speaker 2: Oh, I have no words.
- 5:52Speaker 1: I mean, you're in HR. You should know better than that.
- 5:54Speaker 2: Zazist is a new one for me. We will have
- 5:57Speaker 2: a workshop on that. Thank you.
- 5:59Speaker 1: I've done my job.
- 6:00Speaker 2: Great.
- 6:02Speaker 1: Brooke and Jeffrey's phone taps on the 20s.