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Why Not At My Age? Do Dreams Expire? · My Sexy Menopause Body

• 0:01
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome to my sexy menopause body.
• 0:04
  SPEAKER_00: Not just a podcast, but a movement.
• 0:07
  SPEAKER_00: Menopause isn't something to dread.
• 0:09
  SPEAKER_00: It's something to own with strength, confidence, and yes, sexiness.
• 0:15
  SPEAKER_00: Because menopause doesn't mean fading into the background, it means stepping fully into who we are.
• 0:22
  SPEAKER_00: And now here's your host, Kim Nicholson.
• 0:26
  SPEAKER_00: Let's get started.
• 0:34
  SPEAKER_01: Hey, it's Kim and welcome back to my sexy menopause body.
• 0:39
  SPEAKER_01: So I want to start today by asking you a question you probably haven't been asked in a very long time.
• 0:50
  SPEAKER_01: Remember when you were a kid and adults would ask you, so what do you want to be when you grow up?
• 0:58
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, come on, we heard it all the time, right?
• 1:02
  SPEAKER_01: What do you want to be?
• 1:05
  SPEAKER_01: A teacher, a doctor, a veterinarian, an actress, an artist, a firefighter, a writer, an astronaut, whatever it may be.
• 1:21
  SPEAKER_01: And when we were little, nobody thought it was strange that we had enormous ideas about our future, right?
• 1:31
  SPEAKER_01: Nobody said, oh well, that's probably unrealistic.
• 1:35
  SPEAKER_01: And nobody asked whether the return on investment was good enough.
• 1:41
  SPEAKER_01: Nobody wanted to know whether, you know, we would use the degree.
• 1:47
  SPEAKER_01: We simply were allowed to imagine, right?
• 1:51
  SPEAKER_01: And then somewhere along our lives, people stop asking us that question, right?
• 1:58
  SPEAKER_01: Because what?
• 1:59
  SPEAKER_01: We get jobs, we build careers, we raise families, we pay mortgages, we take care of parents, we take care of children, we take care of everybody.
• 2:07
  SPEAKER_01: And eventually that question shifts from what do you want to be?
• 2:13
  SPEAKER_01: to hey, when are you going to retire?
• 2:15
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, I cannot tell you the amount of people that ask me that.
• 2:19
  SPEAKER_01: Mainly it's my family.
• 2:23
  SPEAKER_01: And I don't know about you, but I think there is an enormous amount of life missing between those two questions.
• 2:32
  SPEAKER_01: So today I want to ask you again, what do you want to be when you grow up?
• 2:41
  SPEAKER_01: Sit there and think about that for just a second.
• 2:44
  SPEAKER_01: And before you laugh and say, Kim, I am grown up.
• 2:48
  SPEAKER_01: Just stay with me, just stay with me.
• 2:50
  SPEAKER_01: Because I'm not suggesting that, you know, if you wanted to be a firefighter when you were, you know, eight years old, you need to run down to the fire department tomorrow and apply for a job.
• 2:59
  SPEAKER_01: That is not what this is about.
• 3:02
  SPEAKER_01: I want you to go underneath the answer.
• 3:07
  SPEAKER_01: So, what was it about that dream that fascinated you?
• 3:12
  SPEAKER_01: What did that little girl think that life would feel like?
• 3:17
  SPEAKER_01: What did that little boy think that life would feel like?
• 3:21
  SPEAKER_01: Was it an adventure maybe?
• 3:24
  SPEAKER_01: Was it helping people?
• 3:26
  SPEAKER_01: Was it being creative?
• 3:28
  SPEAKER_01: Or, you know, was it independence?
• 3:32
  SPEAKER_01: Was it a leadership role?
• 3:34
  SPEAKER_01: Was it learning?
• 3:36
  SPEAKER_01: Did it require travel?
• 3:38
  SPEAKER_01: Was it exciting to you?
• 3:40
  SPEAKER_01: Did it involve animals?
• 3:42
  SPEAKER_01: Or was it all about science that you liked?
• 3:45
  SPEAKER_01: Was it the performing arts?
• 3:48
  SPEAKER_01: Was it being useful to someone?
• 3:53
  SPEAKER_01: Was it belonging to something?
• 3:56
  SPEAKER_01: Because that part may still be there.
• 4:00
  SPEAKER_01: And maybe this is your opportunity to bring some of that back.
• 4:05
  SPEAKER_01: I think about this in my own life.
• 4:08
  SPEAKER_01: You know, just a few years ago, I graduated with another advanced degree.
• 4:13
  SPEAKER_01: And yes, I had people ask me, why would you do that at your age?
• 4:19
  SPEAKER_01: Actually, I kind of played a game with it because I would tell people that I'm going back to get my master's in health and science and nutrition.
• 4:28
  SPEAKER_01: And there would be this pause, this kind of empty pause.
• 4:33
  SPEAKER_01: And I always wondered if do you I know that they're asking, or they're at least thinking to themselves, why is she going back at her age?
• 4:41
  SPEAKER_01: Only a few people really asked me, but I know that they thought about that.
• 4:47
  SPEAKER_01: And you know what my answer was?
• 4:48
  SPEAKER_01: And it still is today.
• 4:50
  SPEAKER_01: Why not at my age?
• 4:53
  SPEAKER_01: Why not?
• 4:53
  SPEAKER_01: Why not?
• 4:54
  SPEAKER_01: Why does education have to belong only to the beginning of your adult life, right?
• 5:00
  SPEAKER_01: Why does curiosity have to have an expiration date?
• 5:05
  SPEAKER_01: Why does a degree only have value if you can immediately turn it around into a promotion or a bigger paycheck, right?
• 5:13
  SPEAKER_01: Because here's why.
• 5:15
  SPEAKER_01: Sometimes being educated in something you care deeply about is enough of a reason to do it.
• 5:24
  SPEAKER_01: And that's why I went back and got another advanced degree.
• 5:29
  SPEAKER_01: Sometimes it's just that important.
• 5:34
  SPEAKER_01: You may or may not even use it, but it's the knowledge that I wanted.
• 5:40
  SPEAKER_01: It was the deeper understanding of topics that I wanted.
• 5:45
  SPEAKER_01: I wanted to, you know, be with others and challenge them and really learn.
• 5:52
  SPEAKER_01: And yeah, you know what?
• 5:54
  SPEAKER_01: It's I doubt if I'll, I mean, I I am a national board certified health and wellness coach, but will I go and use it in the healthcare system?
• 6:03
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe.
• 6:03
  SPEAKER_01: Who knows?
• 6:04
  SPEAKER_01: Who knows?
• 6:06
  SPEAKER_01: But I just want you to understand that, you know, sometimes just being educated in something you care deeply about is just enough of a reason, right?
• 6:18
  SPEAKER_01: So maybe you want to go back and finish that degree you never completed.
• 6:23
  SPEAKER_01: Why not?
• 6:25
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe you want that master's degree or that PhD.
• 6:30
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe you just want to take one class in something that you've always wondered about.
• 6:36
  SPEAKER_01: And I know that there are incredible classes out there, you know, at uh community colleges.
• 6:42
  SPEAKER_01: I used to teach at a few a community college, so I know what's available out there.
• 6:48
  SPEAKER_01: So no, if you went back and took just one class, you know, maybe it's history class that you want, or a nutrition class, like you know, like me, psychology class.
• 6:59
  SPEAKER_01: How about art?
• 7:01
  SPEAKER_01: How about astronomy?
• 7:03
  SPEAKER_01: How about literature or religion or learning a new language like Italian?
• 7:09
  SPEAKER_01: You know, whatever it is, and some whatever it is that you feel like you want to follow, just do it.
• 7:17
  SPEAKER_01: And again, there somebody may come up and ask you, what are you going to do with that?
• 7:24
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe your answer gets to be, I'm going to learn.
• 7:28
  SPEAKER_01: And that counts.
• 7:29
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, that gets them all the time.
• 7:32
  SPEAKER_01: So let's go back to some of those answers that we as kids gave when we were asked, What do you want to be when you grow up?
• 7:41
  SPEAKER_01: So let's think about this.
• 7:43
  SPEAKER_01: I know for me, I wanted to be a teacher.
• 7:47
  SPEAKER_01: Now, I may not or you may not want to walk into an elementary school classroom today and begin a new full-time career.
• 7:55
  SPEAKER_01: Nope, don't want to do that.
• 7:57
  SPEAKER_01: But what did being a teacher represent to you?
• 8:03
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe, like me, you love explaining things.
• 8:06
  SPEAKER_01: That's why today I am a teacher.
• 8:09
  SPEAKER_01: I'm a National Board Certified Health and Wellness Coach.
• 8:12
  SPEAKER_01: So maybe that is my fulfillment of being a teacher.
• 8:17
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe you liked helping someone finally understand something.
• 8:22
  SPEAKER_01: I know I do.
• 8:24
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe you liked being that person who encouraged or encourages someone else.
• 8:30
  SPEAKER_01: I know I do.
• 8:31
  SPEAKER_01: So let me ask you this question.
• 8:33
  SPEAKER_01: If yours was being a teacher, and I know so many uh kids that still today, that's their answer, what they want to be when they grow up.
• 8:41
  SPEAKER_01: So, what does a teacher look like now to you?
• 8:46
  SPEAKER_01: You could be a tutor.
• 8:47
  SPEAKER_01: Yep, you could.
• 8:49
  SPEAKER_01: You could teach English as a second language.
• 8:52
  SPEAKER_01: How about that?
• 8:53
  SPEAKER_01: You could lead a Bible study, you could teach cooking classes like I do, you could become a museum docent.
• 9:01
  SPEAKER_01: I actually did that too when I lived up in Boston.
• 9:05
  SPEAKER_01: You could mentor younger women, you could actually teach a community class like I did, you could teach workshops, you could become an adjunct professor.
• 9:17
  SPEAKER_01: Yes, you can.
• 9:19
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe the dream wasn't actually about having a classroom, but you know what?
• 9:24
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe it was about sharing what you know.
• 9:26
  SPEAKER_01: And guess what?
• 9:27
  SPEAKER_01: You can still do that.
• 9:29
  SPEAKER_01: How about maybe you wanted to be a doctor?
• 9:31
  SPEAKER_01: Let's look at that one.
• 9:32
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe you were fascinated by the human body, maybe you've loved science like I did.
• 9:38
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe you wanted to help people feel better.
• 9:41
  SPEAKER_01: That doesn't mean you have to go back to medicine medical school right now, right?
• 9:45
  SPEAKER_01: But that curiosity still has somewhere to go.
• 9:49
  SPEAKER_01: You could study anatomy, you can take nutrition courses, you can study public health, you can volunteer at a hospital, you can become involved with a health nonprofit, you can become a patient advocate, you can earn a legitimate certificate in a health field that genuinely is interesting to you.
• 10:11
  SPEAKER_01: You can become the person in your community who helps people understand good health information without pretending to be their doctor, right?
• 10:19
  SPEAKER_01: So the question becomes: what was that original spark to that six-year-old or that eight-year-old's you?
• 10:28
  SPEAKER_01: What was it?
• 10:30
  SPEAKER_01: The question is not how do I recreate that exact job?
• 10:35
  SPEAKER_01: What was the original spark?
• 10:38
  SPEAKER_01: Here's another one that many of my friends and family members, my little cousins, one of them said that they wanted to be a writer.
• 10:46
  SPEAKER_01: Well, why aren't you writing now?
• 10:49
  SPEAKER_01: Huh?
• 10:50
  SPEAKER_01: You don't need a book contract first.
• 10:52
  SPEAKER_01: You can start a book.
• 10:54
  SPEAKER_01: Take the writing class that you've been wanting to take, join a writer's group.
• 10:59
  SPEAKER_01: There's so many of those online right now.
• 11:02
  SPEAKER_01: Write essays, um, write down your family stories.
• 11:06
  SPEAKER_01: Write about your mom or your dad, or write about your marriage, or write about your divorce, or how about the house you grew up in?
• 11:16
  SPEAKER_01: Or how about the recipes everybody forgot to write down?
• 11:20
  SPEAKER_01: Write letters to your grandchildren about who you were before they knew you.
• 11:26
  SPEAKER_01: And you know what?
• 11:27
  SPEAKER_01: Submit something for publication, or don't.
• 11:30
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe the value is just simply in becoming a woman who wants to write.
• 11:35
  SPEAKER_01: There is nothing wrong with that.
• 11:37
  SPEAKER_01: You don't have to have a published book to be a writer.
• 11:42
  SPEAKER_01: And I also uh have self-published books as well, so I have uh both.
• 11:49
  SPEAKER_01: And I still have books that I want to write.
• 11:51
  SPEAKER_01: Matter of fact, I've got another children's book that I'm writing right now, and um anyway, it's a lot of fun.
• 11:58
  SPEAKER_01: So you can still be a writer.
• 12:00
  SPEAKER_01: Now, how about my friends, and one in particular, Mona?
• 12:06
  SPEAKER_01: You wanted to be an artist when you were little.
• 12:09
  SPEAKER_01: Some of us decided very early that maybe we're not talented enough, like my stick figure drawings.
• 12:15
  SPEAKER_01: That's about as far as I can go.
• 12:16
  SPEAKER_01: But I appreciate art, I love it.
• 12:19
  SPEAKER_01: So we looked at the child next to us who could really draw perfect chores and think, well, I can't do that, so that ends my career.
• 12:28
  SPEAKER_01: And that was it, it was over with.
• 12:29
  SPEAKER_01: Dream over.
• 12:31
  SPEAKER_01: But what if the point now isn't whether you are talented?
• 12:36
  SPEAKER_01: But what if the point now is if you love color or beauty or making something with your hands?
• 12:43
  SPEAKER_01: You know, take a take watercolor classes or a ceramic course.
• 12:48
  SPEAKER_01: Um, something I'd like to do is take a photography course.
• 12:52
  SPEAKER_01: Um, a friend of mine is doing a floral design class right now.
• 12:56
  SPEAKER_01: You could take a drawing class, or how about even jewelry making?
• 13:00
  SPEAKER_01: You could even go to museums and actually learn about the artists.
• 13:05
  SPEAKER_01: Instead of walking through in 45 minutes and then heading down to the cafeteria, you could actually learn about them.
• 13:12
  SPEAKER_01: And you don't have to become a professional artist for art to become a part of your life.
• 13:17
  SPEAKER_01: It's simple.
• 13:18
  SPEAKER_01: There are a lot of options out there.
• 13:21
  SPEAKER_01: How about those of you who wanted to be an actress?
• 13:23
  SPEAKER_01: Hmm, okay, why?
• 13:26
  SPEAKER_01: Did you love performing?
• 13:28
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe.
• 13:28
  SPEAKER_01: Did you love storytelling?
• 13:31
  SPEAKER_01: Did you love dressing up in costumes in theater?
• 13:33
  SPEAKER_01: I can hear you guys saying yes right now.
• 13:36
  SPEAKER_01: Did you love making people laugh?
• 13:38
  SPEAKER_01: Oh my goodness, absolutely.
• 13:40
  SPEAKER_01: I'm sure the answer is yes.
• 13:42
  SPEAKER_01: Well, guess what?
• 13:43
  SPEAKER_01: There are community theaters everywhere.
• 13:46
  SPEAKER_01: Take an acting class, take an improv class, audition for a local production, or even try a voiceover.
• 13:55
  SPEAKER_01: For this podcast, I hired a professional person who did the voiceover for my intro and my outro.
• 14:01
  SPEAKER_01: And guess what?
• 14:02
  SPEAKER_01: She I've heard her do Toyota commercials.
• 14:05
  SPEAKER_01: She's on television.
• 14:06
  SPEAKER_01: I've heard her voice multiple times.
• 14:09
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe you've got one of those incredible voices and you could do a voiceover.
• 14:15
  SPEAKER_01: So look into local commercials.
• 14:18
  SPEAKER_01: Or guess what?
• 14:19
  SPEAKER_01: Just take a class because you've always wondered what it would feel like to be up on stage.
• 14:23
  SPEAKER_01: You don't have to become Merrill Street for the dream to count, right?
• 14:27
  SPEAKER_01: How about those of you who wanted to become a singer?
• 14:31
  SPEAKER_01: Guess what?
• 14:32
  SPEAKER_01: You could join a choir.
• 14:33
  SPEAKER_01: You can take voice lessons, you could sing at church, you could learn piano, you could even go to open mic night somewhere, perform anywhere somewhere, or just sing because music makes you feel like yourself.
• 14:50
  SPEAKER_01: You don't need a record deal for music to belong in your life, right?
• 14:55
  SPEAKER_01: How about those of you, I another group of my friends, actually it was my niece.
• 15:00
  SPEAKER_01: She always wanted to be a vet.
• 15:02
  SPEAKER_01: She wanted to be a veterinarian because she loved animals.
• 15:06
  SPEAKER_01: Well, she chose a different career, but if that's still within her, she could do things like volunteer at a shelter, foster animals, right?
• 15:17
  SPEAKER_01: How about help a rescue organization or help train a therapy dog?
• 15:24
  SPEAKER_01: Or how about something like learn about, you know, like wildlife rehabilitation, right?
• 15:30
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe this childhood job title was veterinarian, but the deeper call was something, I want animals in my life.
• 15:36
  SPEAKER_01: Well, that's great.
• 15:37
  SPEAKER_01: So guess what?
• 15:39
  SPEAKER_01: Put animals in your life.
• 15:42
  SPEAKER_01: For some of you, maybe you wanted to be that firefighter or that police officer.
• 15:46
  SPEAKER_01: Again, I'm not suggesting that tomorrow morning you report for Academy Dream.
• 15:53
  SPEAKER_01: Ask yourself, what was it that attracted me to that?
• 15:58
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe it was the act of courage.
• 16:02
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe it was the act of action, just being in the middle of action.
• 16:07
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe it was the act of service or teamwork, or maybe you had a heart for helping in an emergency.
• 16:17
  SPEAKER_01: So being the person who knows exactly what to do when everybody else is panicking, maybe that's your personality.
• 16:23
  SPEAKER_01: So there are adult versions of that calling you right now.
• 16:27
  SPEAKER_01: There are community emergency response teams, right?
• 16:31
  SPEAKER_01: There's the Red Cross, you can volunteer at the Red Cross, an outstanding organization.
• 16:36
  SPEAKER_01: There's also disaster relief organizations.
• 16:40
  SPEAKER_01: Heck, there's even neighborhood emergency preparedness.
• 16:44
  SPEAKER_01: There's even volunteer organizations that train people to help during crisis times.
• 16:50
  SPEAKER_01: And maybe you wanted to be useful at a moment that mattered, but guess what?
• 16:55
  SPEAKER_01: You can still find places where that matters.
• 16:58
  SPEAKER_01: So don't give up on that dream.
• 17:00
  SPEAKER_01: How about those of you who wanted to be an explorer?
• 17:03
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, I love this one.
• 17:05
  SPEAKER_01: So what does explore mean now?
• 17:10
  SPEAKER_01: Does it mean travel?
• 17:12
  SPEAKER_01: Does it mean hiking?
• 17:13
  SPEAKER_01: Does it mean national park?
• 17:15
  SPEAKER_01: Does it mean, you know, genealogy trips?
• 17:19
  SPEAKER_01: Does it mean learning another language or studying archaeology?
• 17:23
  SPEAKER_01: How about traveling to places your grandparents came from?
• 17:26
  SPEAKER_01: I did that.
• 17:27
  SPEAKER_01: We went back to uh outside of Oslo, Norway.
• 17:31
  SPEAKER_01: We still have relatives there, but it was so fascinating to see where my relatives came from.
• 17:37
  SPEAKER_01: How about going somewhere alone, traveling alone?
• 17:41
  SPEAKER_01: How about, you know what, taking the back road somewhere.
• 17:44
  SPEAKER_01: You know, those Sunday afternoon drives that the family used to pack in the car and take those back road drives.
• 17:50
  SPEAKER_01: Those are wonderful times.
• 17:52
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe you could still do that.
• 17:54
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe that satisfies that little urge for you.
• 17:57
  SPEAKER_01: Or how about learning the history of your own city?
• 18:01
  SPEAKER_01: One of the businesses that I work for in Dallas years ago wanted me to write kind of an yeah, for anyone who came new into the company, wanted me to do a little background of the history of the company, of the excuse me, of our city in Dallas.
• 18:16
  SPEAKER_01: And I went and interviewed people and I went into the libraries and I got this.
• 18:21
  SPEAKER_01: I I learned things about Dallas that I never even was aware of.
• 18:25
  SPEAKER_01: It's fascinating.
• 18:26
  SPEAKER_01: So anybody, you can do this, you can learn the history of your own city.
• 18:32
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe you uh don't need to discover a new continent, huh?
• 18:37
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe you, you know, you need more of a discovery in your life.
• 18:41
  SPEAKER_01: So again, there are so many options if you always wanted to be an explorer.
• 18:47
  SPEAKER_01: Now, another one, maybe you wanted to be a scientist.
• 18:51
  SPEAKER_01: Well, guess what?
• 18:52
  SPEAKER_01: You can study astronomy today, you could study geology or biology, or join a citizen science project, or learn how to use a telescope.
• 19:04
  SPEAKER_01: That would be a ton of fun.
• 19:06
  SPEAKER_01: Or go on a science-oriented trip.
• 19:09
  SPEAKER_01: You know, again, there's so many of those online that you can sign up for, and they're those, you know, tour travel guides that are that specific with specific needs in mind.
• 19:21
  SPEAKER_01: So find a science-oriented trip.
• 19:23
  SPEAKER_01: That would be so cool.
• 19:25
  SPEAKER_01: How about again, just like other ones, take college courses or join a local astronomy club?
• 19:31
  SPEAKER_01: There's plenty of those out there, and there are scientists all over this world using data gathered by ordinary citizens like us.
• 19:42
  SPEAKER_01: So don't give up.
• 19:44
  SPEAKER_01: Your curiosity is just not reserved for people with lab coats and laboratories.
• 19:49
  SPEAKER_01: It's reserved for you if that's what you want, if you wanted to be a scientist.
• 19:55
  SPEAKER_01: Um one of my kids wanted to start their own restaurant.
• 19:59
  SPEAKER_01: So maybe owning or opening a restaurant today sounds like an absolute nightmare.
• 20:05
  SPEAKER_01: It would be for me.
• 20:06
  SPEAKER_01: I like cooking, but I I love it, but I would never want to open my own restaurant.
• 20:13
  SPEAKER_01: So fair enough, yeah, it could be a nightmare.
• 20:16
  SPEAKER_01: But what did you really want when you said you wanted to open up a restaurant?
• 20:21
  SPEAKER_01: Did you want to cook for others?
• 20:24
  SPEAKER_01: Did you want to feed people?
• 20:26
  SPEAKER_01: Did you want to create these beautiful meals?
• 20:31
  SPEAKER_01: Or did you want to host parties or friends or strangers?
• 20:37
  SPEAKER_01: Did you want to develop recipes?
• 20:40
  SPEAKER_01: Did you want to bring people together around a table?
• 20:43
  SPEAKER_01: Guess what?
• 20:44
  SPEAKER_01: There are things that you can do.
• 20:45
  SPEAKER_01: You can host a supper club, you can teach a cooking class, you can develop your own recipes or create your own cooking channel.
• 20:54
  SPEAKER_01: I've got one on YouTube, Kim's Tech's Mediterranean Kitchen.
• 20:59
  SPEAKER_01: But you could do the same.
• 21:00
  SPEAKER_01: There's nothing stopping you from doing the same.
• 21:03
  SPEAKER_01: You could have monthly dinners where everyone, you know, brings something new.
• 21:07
  SPEAKER_01: So you teach each other new recipes.
• 21:11
  SPEAKER_01: You can actually honor the dream without taking out a you know a commercial lease and spending your life worrying about food costs.
• 21:18
  SPEAKER_01: So the possibilities are still there.
• 21:21
  SPEAKER_01: How about those of you who wanted to be a dancer?
• 21:25
  SPEAKER_01: Guess what?
• 21:26
  SPEAKER_01: Take ballroom lessons.
• 21:27
  SPEAKER_01: It's a blast.
• 21:29
  SPEAKER_01: Take country western dance again.
• 21:32
  SPEAKER_01: So much fun.
• 21:34
  SPEAKER_01: How about salsa?
• 21:36
  SPEAKER_01: How about adult ballet?
• 21:38
  SPEAKER_01: How about tap lessons?
• 21:40
  SPEAKER_01: You know, go on a dance trip somewhere.
• 21:43
  SPEAKER_01: You know, maybe performing sounds exciting to you, or maybe just don't perform, maybe just dance for yourself.
• 21:49
  SPEAKER_01: Just become the woman who dances in the kitchen while you're making dinner.
• 21:55
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe she has been waiting for you for the past 50 years.
• 22:00
  SPEAKER_01: You know, that's the beauty of allowing yourself to continue to dream.
• 22:06
  SPEAKER_01: Let's see, those of you who wanted to be a professor, this one really speaks to me because sometimes women think education after a certain point is so frivolous.
• 22:14
  SPEAKER_01: But guess what?
• 22:15
  SPEAKER_01: It's not.
• 22:16
  SPEAKER_01: Go back to school, earn that master's degree, pursue that doctorate degree, audit university courses, teach workshops, lecture, research something simply because you can't stop wondering about it.
• 22:29
  SPEAKER_01: You know, we talk so much about like exercising the body.
• 22:32
  SPEAKER_01: Learning asks something of the brain too.
• 22:35
  SPEAKER_01: And beyond that, it gives you something to wake up and to be curious about.
• 22:40
  SPEAKER_01: So maybe you wanted to be a journalist.
• 22:43
  SPEAKER_01: Guess what?
• 22:44
  SPEAKER_01: You can interview fascinating people, start a podcast, write profiles, document your local history, talk to people whose stories might otherwise just completely disappear.
• 22:56
  SPEAKER_01: Write about your community, talk to your parents while you still can and record their stories.
• 23:03
  SPEAKER_01: There are extraordinary stories everywhere you look.
• 23:07
  SPEAKER_01: Everybody's got a story.
• 23:09
  SPEAKER_01: And maybe what you've always wanted wasn't a newsroom.
• 23:13
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe what you wanted was to ask questions and tell those stories.
• 23:17
  SPEAKER_01: Guess what?
• 23:18
  SPEAKER_01: You can do that right now.
• 23:20
  SPEAKER_01: Or maybe you wanted to be an astronaut.
• 23:23
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, well, you probably aren't going to be calling NASA tomorrow.
• 23:27
  SPEAKER_01: But what was underneath it, just like what we've just been doing.
• 23:31
  SPEAKER_01: What was underneath that desire or that dream?
• 23:35
  SPEAKER_01: Was it discovery?
• 23:37
  SPEAKER_01: Think about it.
• 23:38
  SPEAKER_01: Was it the science behind it?
• 23:41
  SPEAKER_01: Was it the adventure behind it?
• 23:43
  SPEAKER_01: So look at the world from a completely different perspective.
• 23:47
  SPEAKER_01: Go to Space Center, study astronomy, travel somewhere with a dark sky designation, learn the constellations, take a physics course, buy that telescope you've been eyeing on Amazon, or just lie outside and look up into the sky.
• 24:03
  SPEAKER_01: You don't have to recreate that literal childhood dream because you are trying to recover that feeling, that feeling inside that dream.
• 24:14
  SPEAKER_01: That is the question I really want you to sit with today.
• 24:19
  SPEAKER_01: What did that little girl in you think that that job would give her?
• 24:24
  SPEAKER_01: Was it adventure?
• 24:26
  SPEAKER_01: Was it recognition?
• 24:27
  SPEAKER_01: Was it helping people?
• 24:29
  SPEAKER_01: Was it creativity?
• 24:30
  SPEAKER_01: Was it freedom?
• 24:32
  SPEAKER_01: Was it knowledge?
• 24:34
  SPEAKER_01: Was it leadership?
• 24:36
  SPEAKER_01: Was it animals?
• 24:37
  SPEAKER_01: Or was it travel or beauty?
• 24:41
  SPEAKER_01: Or excitement or belonging?
• 24:44
  SPEAKER_01: Because maybe the career wasn't the important part at all.
• 24:48
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe it was pointing towards something that was about you that has been buried underneath responsibility for a long time.
• 24:58
  SPEAKER_01: And you can still bring that out.
• 25:00
  SPEAKER_01: So I want to give you four questions before I end this podcast today.
• 25:04
  SPEAKER_01: And I actually want you to write these down.
• 25:05
  SPEAKER_01: So if you got a journal or a piece of paper, write these down.
• 25:10
  SPEAKER_01: So ask yourself, what did I once want to be?
• 25:14
  SPEAKER_01: Now don't judge the answer.
• 25:16
  SPEAKER_01: Don't criticize yourself.
• 25:18
  SPEAKER_01: Don't make it up.
• 25:19
  SPEAKER_01: What was it that you, when somebody asked you, what do you want to be when you grow up?
• 25:23
  SPEAKER_01: Write it down.
• 25:24
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe you had 10 answers.
• 25:26
  SPEAKER_01: Write them all down.
• 25:28
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe you just had two.
• 25:31
  SPEAKER_01: Then the second thing I want you to write down now is think about this.
• 25:36
  SPEAKER_01: What attracted me to it?
• 25:40
  SPEAKER_01: You know, what was that that I really wanted from being a teacher?
• 25:45
  SPEAKER_01: Go underneath the job.
• 25:48
  SPEAKER_01: What did you imagine your days would feel like?
• 25:53
  SPEAKER_01: Third one, where is that quality missing from your life right now?
• 25:59
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe you wanted an adventure and your life was becoming incredibly predictable or boring, right?
• 26:04
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe you wanted creativity and everything you know or you do now has an outcome attached to it.
• 26:10
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe you wanted to teach and you have for decades of experience and nobody is benefiting from them.
• 26:17
  SPEAKER_01: There are people who can benefit from your experience right now.
• 26:21
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe you wanted to help people and you miss feeling connected to something larger than yourself.
• 26:27
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe you wanted to perform and you want to spend years trying not to draw attention to yourself.
• 26:33
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe that's what you really wanted.
• 26:35
  SPEAKER_01: And then the fourth thing I want you to think about, of course, and write down is what is one grown-up version of that dream that I could try now.
• 26:46
  SPEAKER_01: Not commit to forever, just try.
• 26:50
  SPEAKER_01: Just one class, one volunteer orientation, or one meeting, or one application, or one trip that you don't normally plan, one lesson, one phone call, one afternoon, just open the door because this connects you to a bigger question that I've been thinking about.
• 27:11
  SPEAKER_01: What do you want to do with the next 10, 20, 30 years?
• 27:16
  SPEAKER_01: What do you want those years to contain?
• 27:18
  SPEAKER_01: Not just how much money do I need for retirement?
• 27:22
  SPEAKER_01: We all think about those things.
• 27:25
  SPEAKER_01: Not where will I live?
• 27:27
  SPEAKER_01: Not when will I stop working and retire?
• 27:30
  SPEAKER_01: Those questions matter.
• 27:31
  SPEAKER_01: I'm not saying they don't matter, but what do these things do for you?
• 27:37
  SPEAKER_01: What do I want to keep?
• 27:40
  SPEAKER_01: What am I willing or ready to stop giving so much of my time to?
• 27:44
  SPEAKER_01: What do I still want to learn?
• 27:46
  SPEAKER_01: What do I want to spend more time with?
• 27:49
  SPEAKER_01: What do I want to experience?
• 27:52
  SPEAKER_01: What do I want to create?
• 27:54
  SPEAKER_01: Where do I want to contribute in life?
• 27:57
  SPEAKER_01: What part of my set, my own self, do I want to bring back?
• 28:02
  SPEAKER_01: And what might I still become?
• 28:05
  SPEAKER_01: Why can't?
• 28:06
  SPEAKER_01: I would love somebody to say to me, Kim, what do you want to be when you grow up?
• 28:11
  SPEAKER_01: And here I am in my 60s.
• 28:13
  SPEAKER_01: I would love, love, adore that person.
• 28:16
  SPEAKER_01: Because you know what?
• 28:17
  SPEAKER_01: I do have answers.
• 28:19
  SPEAKER_01: I'm not going to share my answers with you this one, but I want you to think about it.
• 28:23
  SPEAKER_01: No matter what age you are right now, what do you want to be when you grow up?
• 28:28
  SPEAKER_01: You still have time because we put so much energy into protecting our family and our health.
• 28:33
  SPEAKER_01: You know, we exercise, we think about proteins, we worry about cholesterol levels, we work on our sleep, we take medications when we need them, when we go to appointments, we read about, you know, the blue zones and longevity.
• 28:47
  SPEAKER_01: We want strong bones, we want strong muscles, we want a healthy brain, we want a healthy heart.
• 28:51
  SPEAKER_01: All of that does matter.
• 28:54
  SPEAKER_01: But what I keep coming back to is this health isn't the destination.
• 29:00
  SPEAKER_01: Health gives you more access to the life you want to live, though.
• 29:05
  SPEAKER_01: And if we're going to work this hard to protect our health and hopefully live a long life, what are we planning to do with those years?
• 29:14
  SPEAKER_01: That, my friends, deserves just as much attention as counting your protein and your workout sessions.
• 29:24
  SPEAKER_01: And you know, maybe right now you're thinking, Kim, I don't even know what I want.
• 29:28
  SPEAKER_01: Guess what?
• 29:28
  SPEAKER_01: That's okay.
• 29:30
  SPEAKER_01: I understand that too.
• 29:31
  SPEAKER_01: You don't need some giant revelation after hearing this podcast.
• 29:35
  SPEAKER_01: You don't even have to sit down this afternoon and discover your life's purpose.
• 29:40
  SPEAKER_01: But start with curiosity, will you?
• 29:42
  SPEAKER_01: At least start with curiosity.
• 29:44
  SPEAKER_01: What catches your attention?
• 29:46
  SPEAKER_01: Even maybe when you're scrolling through social media, what is it that catches your attention?
• 29:51
  SPEAKER_01: What do you read about when nobody, you know, uh tells you something?
• 29:55
  SPEAKER_01: When you want to research something yourself?
• 29:58
  SPEAKER_01: What places make you curious?
• 30:02
  SPEAKER_01: Like, is there places you want to travel?
• 30:05
  SPEAKER_01: Why?
• 30:05
  SPEAKER_01: What is it that you hope to achieve by going to those places and figure out your answers?
• 30:11
  SPEAKER_01: I think they may be extremely revealing to you.
• 30:14
  SPEAKER_01: How about what one gave me give me a subject that you could listen to someone talk about for hours that's telling you that you've got that desire in you?
• 30:24
  SPEAKER_01: Is there something you miss?
• 30:26
  SPEAKER_01: You know, who do you envy a little?
• 30:29
  SPEAKER_01: And what are they doing that you wish you were doing right now at our age?
• 30:35
  SPEAKER_01: And then the last one, this last one can be very revealing.
• 30:40
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe you see someone traveling and you think, I wish I could do that.
• 30:45
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe the answer isn't jealousy, maybe it's information.
• 30:50
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe there's a part of you that's saying, you know, I want some adventure too.
• 30:56
  SPEAKER_01: So pay attention to those little voices in your head.
• 30:59
  SPEAKER_01: And here's something else I want us to stop doing.
• 31:03
  SPEAKER_01: Stop believing that everything we pursue now has to become a business because it does not.
• 31:08
  SPEAKER_01: You can learn French without having to monetize it.
• 31:11
  SPEAKER_01: You can paint without having to sell a single one, you can get a degree without turning it into a brand new career, you can cook without starting a food company, you can dance without performing, you can write without building a platform, you can travel without making content, you can volunteer without putting it on LinkedIn.
• 31:29
  SPEAKER_01: Some things simply make your life richer.
• 31:33
  SPEAKER_01: And guess what?
• 31:34
  SPEAKER_01: That is enough.
• 31:36
  SPEAKER_01: And if someone looks at you and says, Why would you want to do that now?
• 31:42
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe you borrow my answer and say, Why not now?
• 31:47
  SPEAKER_01: Why not at my age?
• 31:49
  SPEAKER_01: Why not learn it?
• 31:51
  SPEAKER_01: Why not try it?
• 31:52
  SPEAKER_01: Why not apply it?
• 31:54
  SPEAKER_01: Why not travel there?
• 31:56
  SPEAKER_01: Why not take those lessons?
• 31:58
  SPEAKER_01: Why not wear it?
• 31:59
  SPEAKER_01: Why not create it?
• 32:00
  SPEAKER_01: Why not go back to school?
• 32:02
  SPEAKER_01: Why not start over in one little corner of your life?
• 32:06
  SPEAKER_01: Because there is no rules that say that all of your becoming has to happen before the age of 40.
• 32:15
  SPEAKER_01: You can still be who you want to be now, 10, 20, 30 years from now.
• 32:22
  SPEAKER_01: So here's what I want you to do after this episode has land has ended.
• 32:27
  SPEAKER_01: I want you to go back and I want you to find that little girl or that little boy for five minutes.
• 32:33
  SPEAKER_01: Envision her.
• 32:34
  SPEAKER_01: See her in your head, maybe pull out an old picture of yourself, and look at that girl or think about that little girl and ask, what did you want to be?
• 32:47
  SPEAKER_01: And then don't laugh at the answer.
• 32:50
  SPEAKER_01: Ask her why.
• 32:52
  SPEAKER_01: That's the part I want you to hear.
• 32:56
  SPEAKER_01: And then ask yourself, what could that look like for me in my life right now?
• 33:03
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, I got goosebumps.
• 33:06
  SPEAKER_01: Because maybe that answer will surprise you.
• 33:09
  SPEAKER_01: Because your life is not built from one enormous decision, as you well know.
• 33:15
  SPEAKER_01: Neither is your health, neither is your confidence, neither is your purpose.
• 33:20
  SPEAKER_01: It is the cumulative effect of the choices you make over time, the class you take, the person you call, the invitation that you uh send out to somebody or that you accept from somebody, the trip you finally book, how about the walk you take, the strength you build, the book you begin, the organization you begin volunteering for, the degree you decide you're still allowed to earn, guess what?
• 33:49
  SPEAKER_01: Those choices add up too, and it's never too late to start making different choices as well.
• 33:55
  SPEAKER_01: So if you've been waiting for permission to become interested in something else again, well, here it is.
• 34:00
  SPEAKER_01: If you've been wondering whether you're too old to go back to school, you're not getting that answer from me.
• 34:08
  SPEAKER_01: You've been thinking about learning something completely impractical, completely off the wall or impractical, well, good.
• 34:16
  SPEAKER_01: Because if there's something that you've wanted to do for 30 years, maybe this is the year you stop saying someday.
• 34:22
  SPEAKER_01: Because someday has a funny way of saying or staying someday.
• 34:27
  SPEAKER_01: It won't change.
• 34:29
  SPEAKER_01: Put something on the calendar, take that one step and see what happens.
• 34:35
  SPEAKER_01: Hey, before you go, I want you to do one more thing.
• 34:38
  SPEAKER_01: I know I've asked you a lot to do today, but I want you to do one more thing for me.
• 34:42
  SPEAKER_01: Send this episode to a woman or a man you would love to have this conversation with, and then ask each other, what did you want to be when you grow up?
• 34:51
  SPEAKER_01: I have a feeling that conversation that follows might be a lot more interesting than you expect.
• 34:58
  SPEAKER_01: Ask it at a party the next time you go or a group that you you meet a bunch of your friends.
• 35:02
  SPEAKER_01: Ask them.
• 35:03
  SPEAKER_01: And if you want to take it one step further, ask, what was it about that dream that you loved?
• 35:10
  SPEAKER_01: That's where the good stuff lives.
• 35:14
  SPEAKER_01: Oh my gosh, I guess I I'm I got so many goosebumps.
• 35:18
  SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna have to get a sweater on or something.
• 35:21
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you so much for listening to this podcast.
• 35:24
  SPEAKER_01: I have been wanting to do this podcast for a year.
• 35:28
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I just had to do it the right way.
• 35:32
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm really glad I think today I gave it, you know, everything that I wanted you to hear, I gave it my all.
• 35:39
  SPEAKER_01: So I hope that you receive something or it sparked your interest or inspired you to do something.
• 35:47
  SPEAKER_01: So this is Kim, and you've been listening to my sexy menopause body.
• 35:52
  SPEAKER_01: And guess what?
• 35:54
  SPEAKER_01: Remember, your choices add up, and your next choice still does matter.
• 36:00
  SPEAKER_01: It's that cumulative effect of the choices you make over time, and it's never too late to make the next one count.
• 36:07
  SPEAKER_01: So, whatever that thing is that you've been quietly calling, that's calling your name, um maybe don't question it.
• 36:16
  SPEAKER_01: Why would I do this now?
• 36:18
  SPEAKER_01: Don't say that.
• 36:19
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe it's simply why not now.
• 36:22
  SPEAKER_01: All right, thank you so much for listening today.
• 36:25
  SPEAKER_01: I appreciate all of you and have a beautiful, beautiful day.
• 36:37
  SPEAKER_00: It's a whole new beginning.
• 36:39
  SPEAKER_00: This is your time to own your power.
• 36:42
  SPEAKER_00: Rewrite the rules and show up unapologetically because sexy doesn't expire.
• 36:49
  SPEAKER_00: You define it.