Latest / Tea Time w/Amie & Bev / Episode #265: Write a New Chapter

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Episode #265: Write a New Chapter · Tea Time w/Amie & Bev

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Hi, everybody, Welcome to tea time with Amy and bed
• 0:04
  Speaker 1: Ex up girl.
• 0:07
  Speaker 2: Not much just beautiful out today.
• 0:09
  Speaker 1: It is beautiful.
• 0:10
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 0:11
  Speaker 1: I've been uh seeing people making changes in life lately.
• 0:20
  Speaker 1: And one of the things I put I frequently will
• 0:25
  Speaker 1: put on this on social media in the comments is, uh,
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: you know you're you're entering a new chapter in your life,
• 0:38
  Speaker 1: and remember you're the author, so make it amazing and
• 0:43
  Speaker 1: looking forward to hearing hearing about it type of things.
• 0:47
  Speaker 1: So I'll put different versions of that in the comments.
• 0:52
  Speaker 1: And it's it's interesting because because lately, Uh, a job
• 1:01
  Speaker 1: offer came up to me and I told him no, sa,
• 1:03
  Speaker 1: I'm actually really pleased with where I'm at right now
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: with my life and my job and all the things.
• 1:08
  Speaker 1: And but I thought about another person. And this other
• 1:13
  Speaker 1: person has some qualifications to do this job, and I'm like,
• 1:19
  Speaker 1: oh my gosh, she'd probably be great at it. So
• 1:22
  Speaker 1: we connected on the phone and they're in the process
• 1:26
  Speaker 1: of starting a business for her husband and she's like,
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: I don't know, I don't know if I can handle
• 1:31
  Speaker 1: this and then and starting a new job and blah
• 1:34
  Speaker 1: blah blah. And I was like, okay, nice, you know,
• 1:38
  Speaker 1: I know you had these qualifications, and I thought of you,
• 1:40
  Speaker 1: and maybe just give this lady a call and just
• 1:44
  Speaker 1: get more information before you say no, Okay, I will.
• 1:48
  Speaker 1: I will. It's like, okay, my job is done, right,
• 1:51
  Speaker 1: I lit it over. My hands are done.
• 1:55
  Speaker 2: I'm out.
• 1:56
  Speaker 1: I'm not going to ask her. You know, I'm not
• 1:59
  Speaker 1: following up with her. This is not my deal. I
• 2:02
  Speaker 1: was the resource, the link, the bridge. I did my part,
• 2:07
  Speaker 1: and if I think about somebody else, I'm gonna let
• 2:10
  Speaker 1: them know too. It's not just exclusive to this one person.
• 2:14
  Speaker 1: So anyway, I got off the phone and I was thinking, man,
• 2:18
  Speaker 1: how many times did I do that? How many times
• 2:21
  Speaker 1: were doors open for me? And I totally resisted it
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: and totally like I don't have time. I don't I
• 2:28
  Speaker 1: can't handle this. There's too much going on. When the
• 2:31
  Speaker 1: universe was answering my prayers opened the doors and I
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: would not why. I cannot tell you how many times
• 2:38
  Speaker 1: that has happened. And then later I kicked myself in
• 2:41
  Speaker 1: the butt for not doing it, and I just kind
• 2:44
  Speaker 1: of thought that about her as we're having this conversation
• 2:47
  Speaker 1: on the phone, and in my head I was like, wow,
• 2:52
  Speaker 1: I remember those days. I remember doing that and sometimes sure,
• 2:55
  Speaker 1: there's been times recently I've done it. And and it's
• 3:03
  Speaker 1: interesting when we ask, we're asking for something new, different, fresh,
• 3:11
  Speaker 1: get it, you know, get get me out of this
• 3:13
  Speaker 1: space I'm in type of thing, and the door opens
• 3:19
  Speaker 1: and we stay where we're at.
• 3:22
  Speaker 2: Like so, there's been.
• 3:24
  Speaker 1: Different things coming up lately, and it's one of those
• 3:28
  Speaker 1: kicking me in the ass type of thing and really
• 3:30
  Speaker 1: pulling at my getting my attention, and I'm like, okay,
• 3:34
  Speaker 1: I gotta do something. I gotta do something because my soul,
• 3:38
  Speaker 1: my spirit is stirring that even though I'm comfortable with
• 3:42
  Speaker 1: where I'm at, that's the issue. I'm comfortable with where
• 3:46
  Speaker 1: I'm at and I'm not pursuing what really lights me up.
• 3:50
  Speaker 1: And I was like, so it showed up through this, Yeah,
• 3:56
  Speaker 1: it showed up through this conversation with this this lady
• 3:58
  Speaker 1: just the other day, like what two days ago, three
• 4:02
  Speaker 1: days ago, and and then a training free training was
• 4:09
  Speaker 1: available and I listened to that and it's just those
• 4:13
  Speaker 1: deep breath moments you're like, okay, okay, I know I
• 4:20
  Speaker 1: hear you, but the universe just saying listen, this is
• 4:24
  Speaker 1: what lights you up. This is what's passionate, what you're
• 4:27
  Speaker 1: passionate about. This is your time, this is your opportunity.
• 4:30
  Speaker 1: There's no better time. You know, I could have started
• 4:33
  Speaker 1: five years ago, ten years ago, but it's been like
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: I've just been dragging my feet and being in a
• 4:42
  Speaker 1: comfort zone. And my mentor says, if you're in a
• 4:47
  Speaker 1: comfort zone, it's tied to time to stir it up.
• 4:50
  Speaker 1: It's time to get out of it, because you need
• 4:51
  Speaker 1: to do something different if you're comfortable.
• 4:53
  Speaker 2: And I was like, I.
• 4:54
  Speaker 1: Could just hear her right now as I just said that,
• 4:57
  Speaker 1: and I'm like, you know, rolling my eyes and like
• 4:59
  Speaker 1: f whatever.
• 5:03
  Speaker 2: But you said it well, just because you really did
• 5:06
  Speaker 2: talking about all this stuff and how we feel that
• 5:09
  Speaker 2: stirring withinside south and it's like this we can label it.
• 5:14
  Speaker 2: Don't get caught up in the labels, but we can
• 5:16
  Speaker 2: label it so easily, like anxiety, feeling like you've got
• 5:22
  Speaker 2: to go do something, Like there's all these feelings that
• 5:24
  Speaker 2: come on, and I do feel like it is the
• 5:26
  Speaker 2: universe's a way gently trying to push us forward, and
• 5:30
  Speaker 2: we don't listen right so, and then little things come
• 5:33
  Speaker 2: after that. But I think we're getting better at listening
• 5:35
  Speaker 2: and airing all that stuff, but it does feel it
• 5:38
  Speaker 2: does feel uncomfortable because it's trying to push us into
• 5:40
  Speaker 2: another space, which does not always feel good. But it's
• 5:44
  Speaker 2: like if when we can see the light at the
• 5:46
  Speaker 2: end of the tunnel, then we then we look back
• 5:48
  Speaker 2: and we're like, oh, this wasn't so bad. But sometimes
• 5:51
  Speaker 2: we just know when it's going to end, or how
• 5:52
  Speaker 2: far it's going to go, or you know, there's just
• 5:55
  Speaker 2: there's the unknown of things, and it's really a choice
• 5:58
  Speaker 2: of how we're showing up in that moment. Lately, I've
• 6:01
  Speaker 2: noticed some some ways that I had shown up to
• 6:05
  Speaker 2: Jim and the relationship, and then how that behavior my
• 6:10
  Speaker 2: old version of myself has shown up outside of myself,
• 6:14
  Speaker 2: so I could see that's how it was before. So
• 6:16
  Speaker 2: I've apologized to Jim some more and then recognize why
• 6:20
  Speaker 2: do we stay in places of struggle or stay into
• 6:24
  Speaker 2: those places when they don't feel good? And it's because
• 6:27
  Speaker 2: we're It's the same thing as before. It's ignoring the
• 6:29
  Speaker 2: emotions and the feelings, Rub some dirt on it, go
• 6:32
  Speaker 2: out and play, you know, whatever whatever the situation, and
• 6:37
  Speaker 2: go go do something so that you can go do
• 6:39
  Speaker 2: something that distracts you from the way you were feeling
• 6:41
  Speaker 2: at that moment, and it doesn't really address anything. So
• 6:44
  Speaker 2: but it's like a lot of that stuff I've looked
• 6:46
  Speaker 2: at and before I used to get so emotional about it.
• 6:50
  Speaker 2: Now I'm just like, I'm sorry, Jim. You know I
• 6:52
  Speaker 2: couldn't could it be any different than I was without
• 6:55
  Speaker 2: this knowledge. And that's why it's so very important for
• 6:57
  Speaker 2: everybody to go find you resonate with find tools. Find
• 7:03
  Speaker 2: you know, if you're listening to a speaker, or you
• 7:05
  Speaker 2: overhear a conversation and they're talking about a certain speaker,
• 7:09
  Speaker 2: whether it's our recordings or somebody else's recording, go listen
• 7:12
  Speaker 2: to it, and then whoever space pops into your mind
• 7:14
  Speaker 2: when you're listening to share it with them too. It's
• 7:16
  Speaker 2: like it's it's listening to the messages all the way,
• 7:19
  Speaker 2: because when we're listening all the time, which is what
• 7:21
  Speaker 2: I hear all the time. So I'm quiet now lately,
• 7:23
  Speaker 2: except for right now, I'm quiet, and because there's nothing
• 7:27
  Speaker 2: for me to discuss, I'm just listening. I'm listening to
• 7:29
  Speaker 2: what's not being said. I'm listening to the silence in
• 7:32
  Speaker 2: between the words, because the words don't matter in a
• 7:37
  Speaker 2: lot of ways. They don't matter on an energetic level.
• 7:40
  Speaker 2: When we're going to lepathy and any of that kind
• 7:42
  Speaker 2: of stuff, we can't The words don't matter. They're not
• 7:45
  Speaker 2: gonna My anxiousness might be just the fear for you, you know,
• 7:48
  Speaker 2: and your feelings. So it's like there's it's a whole
• 7:51
  Speaker 2: different dimension when you start going in and feeling how
• 7:54
  Speaker 2: this shows up on your body and feeling how you
• 7:56
  Speaker 2: feel right now, and feeling how that feels when that happens,
• 8:00
  Speaker 2: and recognizing, you know, seeing the flash, knowing that all
• 8:03
  Speaker 2: of it's part of a process for you to move forward.
• 8:05
  Speaker 2: It's not trying to punish you. It's not trying to
• 8:08
  Speaker 2: make you look at how bad you were. It's free
• 8:11
  Speaker 2: to look at things and see how you can show
• 8:13
  Speaker 2: up and do better. Yeah, what feels better?
• 8:17
  Speaker 1: Yeah, And you do get to write this story and
• 8:24
  Speaker 1: we we'll oftentimes do things because quote unquote that's the
• 8:34
  Speaker 1: way it's always been done. That's a comfort zone. We know,
• 8:39
  Speaker 1: this is this is how it's been done. This is
• 8:45
  Speaker 1: the guidelines, and we don't default from that. We're gonna
• 8:48
  Speaker 1: keep doing this over and over and over and over
• 8:50
  Speaker 1: and over again. Well, at some point this is what
• 8:53
  Speaker 1: I'm recognizing with different in different ways of my life,
• 8:58
  Speaker 1: in different areas, is that gets that starts feeling old
• 9:03
  Speaker 1: or stagnant, and then other people start expecting that too.
• 9:08
  Speaker 1: They're like, Okay, well this is what's happening. And when
• 9:12
  Speaker 1: you don't. One of the things I heard long time
• 9:17
  Speaker 1: ago was keep eighty percent the same and change twenty percent.
• 9:22
  Speaker 1: That way it feels fresh and new. And so I've
• 9:25
  Speaker 1: been taking that into consideration in the different areas of
• 9:29
  Speaker 1: my life and I'm like, yeah, we can keep eighty
• 9:32
  Speaker 1: percent the same and then just make a little shift
• 9:35
  Speaker 1: here and there to help it be feel fresh and different.
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: That's one of the things I like. I like variety,
• 9:43
  Speaker 1: and when things start getting stale, stagnant, redundant, I'm like, who,
• 9:52
  Speaker 1: I gotta change something because I'm going to get bored
• 9:54
  Speaker 1: out of my brain and I am not going to
• 9:57
  Speaker 1: be it's not going to be pretty like when things
• 10:01
  Speaker 1: like I check out. When I get to that point,
• 10:06
  Speaker 1: and really, I keep eighty percent of it the same
• 10:09
  Speaker 1: and change twenty percent, it's just enough variety that I'm interested.
• 10:14
  Speaker 1: I'm like, Okay, let's keep doing this and let's see
• 10:17
  Speaker 1: what happens. So it's still it could still you're still
• 10:22
  Speaker 1: staying in a somewhat comfort comfort zone. However, you're also
• 10:28
  Speaker 1: adding a little bit of lightness or a little bit
• 10:31
  Speaker 1: of change that keeps you interested, keeps you going, and
• 10:35
  Speaker 1: keeps you curious because that twenty percent of change. You
• 10:40
  Speaker 1: need to figure out what that is. What do I
• 10:41
  Speaker 1: want to what's the twenty percent I want to change?
• 10:44
  Speaker 1: How am I going to change that? How can I
• 10:46
  Speaker 1: play with that? How can I have What information do
• 10:50
  Speaker 1: I need? So there's still a lot of curiosity there
• 10:54
  Speaker 1: and maybe some research or just getting some data to
• 11:01
  Speaker 1: help you make that shift. So that's been that's been interesting,
• 11:05
  Speaker 1: and that's one of the things we're implementing with a
• 11:10
  Speaker 1: big event that we plan every month at work.
• 11:13
  Speaker 2: It's keep keep eighty.
• 11:15
  Speaker 1: Percent of it the same and only change about twenty percent,
• 11:19
  Speaker 1: so the community feel will feel like it's a little
• 11:24
  Speaker 1: different each time. So like, I'm going to do that.
• 11:30
  Speaker 2: And this expansion, right, this expansion, it's gosh, I get bored.
• 11:37
  Speaker 2: Everything you said is just one hundred percent. I get bored.
• 11:40
  Speaker 2: And that's it. Like I don't even want to do
• 11:42
  Speaker 2: it anymore. It's mundane. It's so it is just taking
• 11:46
  Speaker 2: that time to really reflect for that twenty percent, what
• 11:50
  Speaker 2: do you really want? What stuff do you want in
• 11:51
  Speaker 2: your experience and really following that direction. And in the beginning,
• 11:55
  Speaker 2: it's not easy, because I will tell you I'm doing
• 11:58
  Speaker 2: a little bit more and more of that, but I'm
• 12:00
  Speaker 2: not doing it all the time because it's that the
• 12:04
  Speaker 2: old routine, right, it's the autopilot. Autopilot steps in and
• 12:08
  Speaker 2: it's like we'll just do the same old stuff. And
• 12:10
  Speaker 2: it's like I've noticed even recently, even on Mother's date
• 12:13
  Speaker 2: was it Mother's Day, might've been my birthday, I don't remember,
• 12:18
  Speaker 2: but I was outside. I was outside working on a
• 12:21
  Speaker 2: sitting area. And that's that's my old patterns because I'm
• 12:24
  Speaker 2: looking at the stuff that I'm wanting to go do
• 12:26
  Speaker 2: because I'm in the house, and I'm like, no, it
• 12:29
  Speaker 2: was my birthday. So i decided to go outside and
• 12:32
  Speaker 2: clear out this area and start calling sand and you know,
• 12:35
  Speaker 2: bucket by bucket from the wash up to the sitting
• 12:38
  Speaker 2: area and putting that stuff down. And it's not completed
• 12:40
  Speaker 2: at this point. And I'll tell you, I wasn't listening
• 12:43
  Speaker 2: to my body. I got a freaking fried in a
• 12:45
  Speaker 2: couple of areas, you know, and I having looked in
• 12:49
  Speaker 2: the book to see at the sunburn, that what that
• 12:51
  Speaker 2: meaning was. But it's definitely definitely gotten there. So irritation
• 12:57
  Speaker 2: for sure. But I was irritated even that day going
• 13:01
  Speaker 2: into it. Just really it's probably the same thing. It's
• 13:06
  Speaker 2: really that pushing you to shift out of this space.
• 13:10
  Speaker 2: And so I went and did that. But it wasn't
• 13:12
  Speaker 2: the same behaviors that I would have done before all
• 13:15
  Speaker 2: day long like that, because I would have gone, I
• 13:17
  Speaker 2: would have gone till nighttime. I would have gone to
• 13:19
  Speaker 2: it was done, to be quite honest with you, and
• 13:21
  Speaker 2: it wasn't. But it's like it was just taking the
• 13:25
  Speaker 2: time to look at it and to go through those feelings.
• 13:27
  Speaker 2: And I wasn't. I wasn't the kid that needed to
• 13:30
  Speaker 2: be seen, seen and heard like I was before when
• 13:33
  Speaker 2: I was doing outside stuff. Look at the job that
• 13:36
  Speaker 2: I'm doing. Look how amazing me this? I'm doing it perfect?
• 13:39
  Speaker 2: And if it wasn't perfect, I would take it out
• 13:40
  Speaker 2: and do it again. And now it's like I don't
• 13:43
  Speaker 2: care as long as I'm comfortable with how it is.
• 13:46
  Speaker 2: Art is art. It's like that's your perspective, that's all
• 13:52
  Speaker 2: that it is it's like, what are you picking up
• 13:54
  Speaker 2: from it? What are you feeling from it? So it's
• 13:55
  Speaker 2: like I've noticed a lot of different changes, but I've
• 13:58
  Speaker 2: noticed the like the psych come back around. But it's
• 14:01
  Speaker 2: like it's not the same. It's not the same. There's
• 14:03
  Speaker 2: different stuff that's going on right now. It's just weird.
• 14:06
  Speaker 2: But so on the other side of all that stuff,
• 14:09
  Speaker 2: I had to stamina to be out there all day long.
• 14:12
  Speaker 2: I was pretty pretty sore that day. I haven't been
• 14:16
  Speaker 2: sore since, so, I mean it's like my body's healing fast.
• 14:19
  Speaker 2: There's things that are happening differently now, almost as if
• 14:23
  Speaker 2: it was reminding me of how I could handle things before.
• 14:25
  Speaker 2: So it's like looking at both sides because there is
• 14:28
  Speaker 2: a plus to it, and then there is the sunburn,
• 14:30
  Speaker 2: right so, which means at that time I have to
• 14:33
  Speaker 2: come inside and I have to take extra care for myself.
• 14:35
  Speaker 2: So I'm giving myself attention that probably needed the attention
• 14:38
  Speaker 2: in the first place, but I was putting it outside.
• 14:41
  Speaker 2: I was working and doing because sometimes that helps me
• 14:43
  Speaker 2: to get those wheels turning, to get that foot going forward,
• 14:47
  Speaker 2: to just do something. And so that's kind of where
• 14:50
  Speaker 2: that's at right now. But it's like I'm recognizing all
• 14:52
  Speaker 2: this process of BEV. What is BEV doing right now?
• 14:56
  Speaker 2: Why does bet? Why is BEV doing that right now?
• 14:58
  Speaker 2: And so it's just it's it's it's an interesting journey
• 15:02
  Speaker 2: for sure to process it. Life is an interesting journey.
• 15:13
  Speaker 1: Yeah, No, it doesn't matter. You could have you could
• 15:15
  Speaker 1: have carried a thousand bucks and buckets of sand and
• 15:18
  Speaker 1: then said, oh that's too much. I don't need that much,
• 15:21
  Speaker 1: and then you got to move the sand, and it's.
• 15:22
  Speaker 2: Just a it's okay, Yeah, it's okay.
• 15:27
  Speaker 1: Each experience just gives us this opportunity to really just
• 15:31
  Speaker 1: look at it, look at the have some self reflection,
• 15:36
  Speaker 1: take note, what would I do different? What what do
• 15:40
  Speaker 1: I like? What? How? How much of this did I like?
• 15:44
  Speaker 1: Maybe it was just being in the sun and moving
• 15:46
  Speaker 1: the body is what you needed? Was it not the sand? Yeah?
• 15:50
  Speaker 1: Or maybe it was the weight of the sand and
• 15:53
  Speaker 1: the bucket for the strength of the body. So there's
• 15:55
  Speaker 1: so many different avenues you could go with that, and
• 16:00
  Speaker 1: just being outside.
• 16:01
  Speaker 2: Breath of fresh air.
• 16:03
  Speaker 1: Yep. Right, So all of any and all of it it's okay.
• 16:10
  Speaker 1: And if you too much stand then okay, now I
• 16:12
  Speaker 1: gotta take some out, or if it's not enough, stand okay,
• 16:16
  Speaker 1: at some point I'll bring some more in. So we
• 16:19
  Speaker 1: just look at it as uh in gosh, we could
• 16:22
  Speaker 1: go so many directions with this. We could look at perfectionism.
• 16:26
  Speaker 1: We could look at like you already said, I need
• 16:30
  Speaker 1: the accolades, I need the I need somebody to see
• 16:33
  Speaker 1: me doing this and telling me what a good job
• 16:35
  Speaker 1: I'm doing. Maybe it's I don't want to be around people,
• 16:41
  Speaker 1: just leave me alone. So like, there's so many directions
• 16:46
  Speaker 1: we could go with that story, and and just listening
• 16:49
  Speaker 1: to the story, how does the story resonate with the listener?
• 16:54
  Speaker 1: How how have you felt that way and recognized how
• 16:58
  Speaker 1: you've been showing up in different experiences needing some of
• 17:04
  Speaker 1: this stuff or just wanting to be alone. Really, I'll
• 17:13
  Speaker 1: do things. I just want to be by myself. I
• 17:15
  Speaker 1: don't want to people just like I don't I don't
• 17:19
  Speaker 1: even want to talk to my husband like I'm just
• 17:21
  Speaker 1: like and not out of a meanness. It's just I
• 17:24
  Speaker 1: need the time for myself to process whatever I'm processing,
• 17:28
  Speaker 1: or just need to be quiet. I could still be
• 17:32
  Speaker 1: doing something, but just be quiet. And so for the listener,
• 17:39
  Speaker 1: It's like just observing yourself as you're moving through your
• 17:43
  Speaker 1: experiences and taking note, what are you thinking about, how
• 17:47
  Speaker 1: are you feeling about it, what is it you're expecting
• 17:49
  Speaker 1: from it, what is it you're seeking from it? And
• 17:54
  Speaker 1: just notice it's just being curious about yourself. And that's
• 17:59
  Speaker 1: that's That's one of the things. The more, of course,
• 18:02
  Speaker 1: the more I practice this, the better I get at it,
• 18:04
  Speaker 1: and the more I more self awareness I have. And
• 18:09
  Speaker 1: I don't always get it right. I'm not always good
• 18:11
  Speaker 1: at it. I have my moments of timber tantrums, as
• 18:14
  Speaker 1: we talked about in the last episode, but I do
• 18:19
  Speaker 1: keep getting better in myself, which is matters to me.
• 18:22
  Speaker 1: That matters to me. I'm taking a position where I'm
• 18:28
  Speaker 1: going to be front and center of an organization of
• 18:31
  Speaker 1: like fifty women. That's huge. There are going to be
• 18:37
  Speaker 1: things that I would never thought I would ever be
• 18:40
  Speaker 1: doing because I'm taking this position. So I keep comparing
• 18:48
  Speaker 1: myself where I'm at to where I used to be.
• 18:51
  Speaker 1: I can only compare myself to me, and this is
• 18:56
  Speaker 1: this is I look in the mirror sometimes I'm like,
• 18:59
  Speaker 1: who is this? I don't even know who this person
• 19:01
  Speaker 1: is because this is so far from the person I
• 19:05
  Speaker 1: used to be that I never thought, well, I must
• 19:08
  Speaker 1: have had the thought it was possible in some way,
• 19:10
  Speaker 1: but really never thought or ever imagined, you know, thirty
• 19:14
  Speaker 1: years ago, that this is the person I would be today.
• 19:17
  Speaker 1: When they say, you know, how do you see yourself
• 19:19
  Speaker 1: in ten years, I'm like, I'm fucked.
• 19:22
  Speaker 2: That's where I see myself.
• 19:24
  Speaker 1: Like it's not going to be good. And when I
• 19:27
  Speaker 1: you know, just even having that thought, I was like, oh,
• 19:30
  Speaker 1: if I'm thinking that, then something better change. Something has
• 19:33
  Speaker 1: got to change, because I cannot imagine living this way
• 19:36
  Speaker 1: for another ten or fifty or one hundred years, Like,
• 19:40
  Speaker 1: I do not want to be this person that I
• 19:43
  Speaker 1: was at when I'm older. I couldn't even imagine what
• 19:50
  Speaker 1: this physical body would be like right now. If I
• 19:54
  Speaker 1: was still in that same mindset and an emotional state
• 19:58
  Speaker 1: that I was in, I would probably I'm going on,
• 20:02
  Speaker 1: I'm fifty four going on fifty five, and I would
• 20:05
  Speaker 1: probably look like I was in my seventies or eighties.
• 20:08
  Speaker 1: If I would have stayed mentally and emotionally where I
• 20:12
  Speaker 1: was at it, there's no doubt in my mind, and
• 20:16
  Speaker 1: my physical body would have been crumbling it. Yeah, I
• 20:21
  Speaker 1: don't even want to try to even imagine fully what
• 20:24
  Speaker 1: that would probably could have been. Like, I just know
• 20:27
  Speaker 1: that the more I practice on myself and the better
• 20:30
  Speaker 1: I get with myself, the better I feel life is getting.
• 20:33
  Speaker 1: And of course I have those moments where I just
• 20:39
  Speaker 1: had one couple weeks where I feel like nothing's going
• 20:42
  Speaker 1: right and what the hell? And I get through it.
• 20:47
  Speaker 1: I don't may not get through it in my best,
• 20:49
  Speaker 1: best version of me, but I get through it, and
• 20:52
  Speaker 1: then I reflect and Okay, how could have done this better?
• 20:57
  Speaker 1: That all of that is just writing a chapter. All
• 20:59
  Speaker 1: of that's being the author of my story. And if
• 21:02
  Speaker 1: I want my story to get better, I got to
• 21:04
  Speaker 1: be the writer. And that's exclamation point. I have to
• 21:09
  Speaker 1: be the one writing the story, not everybody else.
• 21:14
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I agree, because because I feel like most of
• 21:18
  Speaker 2: my life someone else has been writing a story, I've
• 21:21
  Speaker 2: allowed someone else to be the author of my story.
• 21:23
  Speaker 2: I've allowed someone else to decide whether I'm worthy or not.
• 21:27
  Speaker 2: I've allowed someone else to make decisions and choices for
• 21:31
  Speaker 2: me because I didn't have my own strength in myself,
• 21:34
  Speaker 2: my own confidence in myself to make a decision that
• 21:37
  Speaker 2: I felt was a good decision, you know, because when
• 21:39
  Speaker 2: we make bad decisions, then we don't make any decisions
• 21:42
  Speaker 2: later on sometimes, And so it's just recognizing all those things,
• 21:46
  Speaker 2: and then it's like, under all that is, you're finding yourself.
• 21:50
  Speaker 2: And it's not like it's a victim story. It's a
• 21:52
  Speaker 2: oh God, I know she's in here, somewhere, underneath all
• 21:55
  Speaker 2: these clothes, all this junk exactly, but oh, there she is.
• 22:00
  Speaker 2: So I'm catching glimpses of myself and I and I
• 22:03
  Speaker 2: refer to it as as she and Bev and Nikki.
• 22:07
  Speaker 2: And because of how I'm talking to that part of
• 22:10
  Speaker 2: my ego, because those are that's part of my story,
• 22:13
  Speaker 2: that's part of my ego, good or good or bad.
• 22:15
  Speaker 2: Sometimes sometimes good, sometimes not so great. And that's okay.
• 22:20
  Speaker 2: But like you said, we just don't spend as much
• 22:22
  Speaker 2: time in those spaces like we used to. We can,
• 22:24
  Speaker 2: we can go to those spaces, but we don't live there.
• 22:27
  Speaker 2: And I used to live there for years, And like
• 22:29
  Speaker 2: you said, we don't want to be that way. You
• 22:32
  Speaker 2: don't want to be a curmudgeon in life, and then
• 22:34
  Speaker 2: and then as your end of days, you're still that
• 22:36
  Speaker 2: same curmudgeon. You're not allowing anyone into your life and
• 22:38
  Speaker 2: you're being that hateful and angry. No, thank you. If
• 22:43
  Speaker 2: that's the way it's gotta be. I'll see you guys
• 22:45
  Speaker 2: later on the next trip around the sun, because peace out,
• 22:50
  Speaker 2: bro out.
• 22:55
  Speaker 1: Out, yep, yep, right there with you, all right, my friends,
• 23:04
  Speaker 1: be the author of your story. I wanted to add
• 23:08
  Speaker 1: to that just real quick. Was when you said, you know,
• 23:11
  Speaker 1: other people have been writing the story or have allowed
• 23:14
  Speaker 1: other people to write the story. I think it's important
• 23:17
  Speaker 1: to mention as well. What that looks like is when
• 23:20
  Speaker 1: you're being the people pleaser and the fixer. That especially
• 23:25
  Speaker 1: the people pleaser, you're doing things for other people out
• 23:28
  Speaker 1: of guilt or obligation or the need to feel accepted
• 23:35
  Speaker 1: and loved. So that's kind of what that was. I'm
• 23:39
  Speaker 1: going to say. What you're referring to is when other
• 23:44
  Speaker 1: people are writing your story or filling your calendar, it's
• 23:47
  Speaker 1: because you're allowing them to do that, and you're allowing
• 23:50
  Speaker 1: yourself to be in that space of wanting to please
• 23:54
  Speaker 1: everybody else or be a fixer of everybody else's problems,
• 23:57
  Speaker 1: meaning you're all up in their business instead of addressing
• 24:01
  Speaker 1: your own. So keep that in mind when you're writing
• 24:05
  Speaker 1: your story. So with that, thanks for hanging out with us.
• 24:11
  Speaker 1: Tea Time with Amy and Bev, and be resourceful. Share
• 24:15
  Speaker 1: this podcast, share a book you've read, Share somebody somebody
• 24:21
  Speaker 1: else you've listened to, an influencer that resonates with you,
• 24:24
  Speaker 1: that's helping you be and do better on your journey,
• 24:28
  Speaker 1: and or have the conversations. Be courageous and have the conversations.
• 24:33
  Speaker 1: If you want to be resourceful, you can share our content,
• 24:36
  Speaker 1: which is found on many platforms, so we're on social media.
• 24:40
  Speaker 1: We're on Facebook, Instagram, YouTube, Spotify, Spreaker podcast, Attic, and iHeartRadio.
• 24:49
  Speaker 1: So just share us with your friends and family and
• 24:53
  Speaker 1: co workers. Any final words.
• 24:57
  Speaker 2: Make a patch of a week, make it a med
• 25:00
  Speaker 2: to go a week that's your That's right, it's your choice, all.
• 25:04
  Speaker 1: Right, friends, thanks for hanging out with us, Tea Time
• 25:06
  Speaker 1: with Amy Bev. We'll see you next time.
• 25:08
  Speaker 2: Bye,