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Phone Tap: Burial Cruise Bargain · Brooke and Jeffrey: Phone Taps

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  Speaker 1: One eight hundred Do you uy away? Now offering free
• 0:02
  Speaker 1: remote consultations by phone or video conference for any criminal offense.
• 0:06
  Speaker 1: Trust Brook, Jeffrey and Jose's friends with a free remote
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  Speaker 1: consultation from Bradley Johnson Lawyers. Visit one eight hundred douy
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  Speaker 1: away dot com Poor call eight hundred do you y Away.
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  Speaker 2: One of our listeners asked us to prank his wife
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  Speaker 2: because she's been bragging to all their friends about this
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  Speaker 2: incredible deal that she got on a cruise package. So
• 0:25
  Speaker 2: her husband thought it might be funny to call and
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  Speaker 2: reveal the real reason this particular cruise ship is offering
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  Speaker 2: such an affordable rate, and afterwards we'll find out if
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  Speaker 2: she's still as thrilled as she was before. In your
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  Speaker 2: phone tap right now? Another Hello, Hi, May I speak
• 0:49
  Speaker 2: with Hopees? Please?
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  Speaker 3: Is this Hope? How can we help you? Hi?
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  Speaker 2: This is Chip Chip Hotele from Prints Cruises. Hi Chi, Hi,
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  Speaker 2: You'll be sailing the Seven Seas with us next weekend.
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  Speaker 3: Yeah, very exciting.
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  Speaker 2: I'm the cruise director, so nice to meet you.
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  Speaker 3: Nice to meet you.
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  Speaker 2: It says here that you and your husband, Parker have
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  Speaker 2: booked an economy cabin with us for the voyage. Yes, yes,
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  Speaker 2: that's great, and they probably already told you that there
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  Speaker 2: is a special cruise, which is why you got such
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  Speaker 2: a screaming deal on that price.
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  Speaker 3: Special. Yeah, sure, I understand what you mean by that.
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  Speaker 2: So in terms of outfits that you're going to be bringing,
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  Speaker 2: we just need you to have at least two black
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  Speaker 2: dresses or suits, you know, for your husband, and we'll
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  Speaker 2: be good to go.
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  Speaker 3: Why what's the name for these outfits?
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  Speaker 2: Well, for the ceremony when we do the burials at sea.
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  Speaker 2: Excuse me, Yeah, that was in the fine print of
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  Speaker 2: that ad that we put out. You signed up for it.
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  Speaker 3: I don't recall it. Who's getting buried?
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  Speaker 2: I mean, there's too many names to list, but this
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  Speaker 2: is a special burial at sea crews, so in half
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  Speaker 2: of the cabins will be occupied by the living, such
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  Speaker 2: as yourself, and half by the ones who have passed.
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  Speaker 3: Oh my, you mean we're going to be on a
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  Speaker 3: boat with dead bodies.
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  Speaker 2: I mean I wouldn't even think about that. For the
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  Speaker 2: most part, it's just a totally normal cruise. It's just
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  Speaker 2: will be throwing bodies off the side every couple hours
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  Speaker 2: or so. No, well, it's much more fun than you think,
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  Speaker 2: you know, you'll you'll just be doing your normal cruise stuff.
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  Speaker 2: Then you'll hear the funeral procession music come up over
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  Speaker 2: the speakers, and at that point you just got to
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  Speaker 2: run to your cabin and get your black dress on.
• 2:43
  Speaker 2: Once you hear the splash, then your goods back to
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  Speaker 2: the pool, shuffleboard, casino, whatever this is.
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  Speaker 3: This is crazy.
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  Speaker 2: Well, you're the one who signed up for this. It
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  Speaker 2: was written.
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  Speaker 3: I didn't know this was included in the end the deal.
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  Speaker 2: What part wasn't included? Are you talking about the dead
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  Speaker 2: bodies or the buffet.
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  Speaker 3: The dead people?
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  Speaker 2: Okay, yeah, I'll be honest. If it was me, probably
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  Speaker 2: wouldn't be my first choice either. But the boat's going
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  Speaker 2: to be full of stiffs, so we got to get
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  Speaker 2: rid of them somehow. And don't forget, it was a
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  Speaker 2: great price, so good.
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  Speaker 3: For you that price for this.
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  Speaker 2: If you're wondering, you don't have to do any of
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  Speaker 2: the embalming yourself. We'll cover all that. We just need
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  Speaker 2: people there for the pictures in the black dresses, just
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  Speaker 2: to show that a lot of people came to say
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  Speaker 2: their final goodbyes. Let's look on the bright side. If
• 3:42
  Speaker 2: you think about it, it's more liquor available for you need.
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  Speaker 3: A lot of liquor.
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  Speaker 2: There you go, because you know the dead people aren't
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  Speaker 2: going to have any right.
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  Speaker 3: No, no, I don't think you have enough flicker to
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  Speaker 3: get me through this.
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  Speaker 2: Okay. No, I'm the cruise director. I'm here to accommodate you.
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  Speaker 2: If you could change anything about it, what would that be, Cly.
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  Speaker 3: The dead people? Okay, I would eliminate that completely.
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  Speaker 2: Okay, Well, what's the second thing that you would change that?
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  Speaker 2: How about more shrimp? We have plenty of ice on
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  Speaker 2: hand for the shrimp, because you know they're keeping the
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  Speaker 2: bodies cool. Oh my god, I think I know what
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  Speaker 2: you're worried about. And if you're thinking that this is
• 4:24
  Speaker 2: going to be some sort of weekend at Bernie's thing
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  Speaker 2: that only happened one time before where we had a
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  Speaker 2: corpse do karaoke.
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  Speaker 3: That actually didn't cross my mind.
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  Speaker 2: No Oh, I thought you had seen like the YouTube
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  Speaker 2: video of that.
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  Speaker 3: No, no, I want.
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  Speaker 2: To assure you I wasn't even there. That was before
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  Speaker 2: my time as the director. So we do things a
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  Speaker 2: lot differently, a lot classier.
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  Speaker 3: Now, Yeah, I think we're going to have to back
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  Speaker 3: out of.
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  Speaker 2: This seal wait, wait, wait, I'm sorry, So you're not
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  Speaker 2: coming or your husband Parker is it? Because I I
• 4:58
  Speaker 2: spoke with Parker earlier and already confirmed he did, and
• 5:02
  Speaker 2: he told me while I'm at ITT to do a
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  Speaker 2: prank phone call on you, my young because my real
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  Speaker 2: name is jeff I work on a radio show called
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  Speaker 2: Drink and Jeffrey in the morning, We're doing a phone
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  Speaker 2: tap on you.
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  Speaker 3: Oh my god, took a breath.
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  Speaker 2: Your husband, Parker set you up because he said you
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  Speaker 2: were talking about what a great deal you got on
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  Speaker 2: this cruise, so we wanted to measure you that were
• 5:35
  Speaker 2: you picturing it in your mind as the bodies were
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  Speaker 2: falling off the.
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  Speaker 3: Side of the crew off the boot.
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  Speaker 2: I didn't even get to tell you about our weekend
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  Speaker 2: at Bernie's shuffleboard tournament to get a partner. He's dead.
• 5:48
  Speaker 2: He can grip the stick while you push.
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  Speaker 1: The weekend every morning was Foo Taps weekday mornings on
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  Speaker 1: the twenties, freaking Jeffrey in the morning.