Latest / Ay Mijita ✨ Embrace your raíces. Reclaim your esencia. / When Life Gets Chaotic — How to Emotionally Regulate, Ground, and Recenter Yourself

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When Life Gets Chaotic — How to Emotionally Regulate, Ground, and Recenter Yourself · Ay Mijita ✨ Embrace your raíces. Reclaim your esencia.

• 0:05
  Dora: Hola hola mi gente bella welcome back to another episode of I Mijita Embracing Your Rices Reclaim Your Essentia Where we heal from inside out Step into our truth and find our grounding even in the middle of life's pinche chaos.
• 0:23
  Dora: Today's episode is for the woman who feels like she's drowning in responsibilities, for the first-gen daughter who always has to be on, for the mom, the wife, the amiga, the healer, who holds everyone else while trying not to crumble herself, for the mujer navigating illness, heartbreak, financial stress, family chaos, uncertainty, and still trying to keep her nervous system from living in survival mode 24-7.
• 0:53
  Dora: Hoy vamos a hablar about emotional regulation, nervous system awareness, grounding, and how to recenter yourself when everything feels like too much.
• 1:03
  Dora: Let's breathe into this together because you deserve softness, space, and sovereignty even in the storm.
• 1:10
  Dora: So grab yourself cabecito, your té or whatever beverage of choice, and let's dive in.
• 1:41
  Dora: Like hold.
• 1:42
  Dora: You gotta suck it up, but handle it.
• 1:46
  Dora: You're strong, you'll figure it out.
• 1:49
  Dora: But nobody taught us how to regulate our emotions, notice our internal signals, or soothe our nervous system.
• 1:57
  Dora: So as adults, chaos doesn't just happen outside of us, it shows up inside our body, like our heart racing, your chest getting tight, your stomach in knots, flight, fight or freeze, overthinking, numbness, shutdown, snappy snapping at people, crying out of nowhere, or feeling disconnected from your body.
• 2:20
  Dora: And then we ask ourselves, why am I like this?
• 2:24
  Dora: Miyamor, because you were never taught safety, but emotional regulation, it's not about perfection, it's about awareness, learning cues, learning what safety feels like, learning how to come back home to yourself when la vida se siente demasiado, when life gets way too above beyond.
• 2:44
  Dora: And so that's where as a daughter, as a mother, as everything, I felt overwhelmed multiple times in my lifetime, and I still feel uh overwhelmed all the time.
• 2:56
  Dora: And that's where years ago I was conditioned to just push through it, we could do this.
• 3:02
  Dora: I would go through my crying little spells every three to four months, every quarter, especially when I was in school and working three jobs in my early 20s and in my teen years.
• 3:12
  Dora: It was really hard, especially as a young parent, as a young mom.
• 3:17
  Dora: And going through all those emotions, like my parents never taught me to emotionally regulate.
• 3:22
  Dora: I didn't even know what that was until like four years ago, well into my mid-30s.
• 3:29
  Dora: Before grounding, you need awareness.
• 3:31
  Dora: So ask yourself, number one, what am I actually feeling right now?
• 3:37
  Dora: Not what you should feel, but what you actually feel.
• 3:40
  Dora: What is your body?
• 3:41
  Dora: What is your mind?
• 3:42
  Dora: Like what are what is coming up for you in this particular moment?
• 3:45
  Dora: And really hone in on that.
• 3:47
  Dora: Identify it, even if it takes you a few.
• 3:49
  Dora: Number two, where do I feel it in my body?
• 3:53
  Dora: Your body always speaks, and that's where do a body, a quick body scan.
• 3:58
  Dora: Like start from the top of your head, all the way down your body, through your head, down to your throat, your neck area, and then keep working through your shoulders, your arms, your chest, your stomach and abs, your hips, down your legs, your knees, your calves, all the way down to your feet, and then into the ground, into mama earth, into Pachamama.
• 4:22
  Dora: And what is it that your body's telling you?
• 4:25
  Dora: Where do you feel it?
• 4:27
  Dora: Do you feel it in your chest, like a track a constriction in your chest?
• 4:30
  Dora: Do you feel a headache?
• 4:32
  Dora: Do you feel a tug in your stomach or not in your throat?
• 4:36
  Dora: Like what is coming up?
• 4:37
  Dora: Number three, does this emotion belong to the present moment or is it an old wound being triggered?
• 4:45
  Dora: Now this, my friends, is huge.
• 4:48
  Dora: And this is where you could definitely have a breakthrough in what comes up.
• 4:52
  Dora: And of course, I'm always here to assist.
• 4:54
  Dora: If you need to reach out, let me know.
• 4:56
  Dora: Number four, am I dysregulated?
• 4:59
  Dora: And if yes, how?
• 5:01
  Dora: Am I activated?
• 5:03
  Dora: Like is it a fight or flight?
• 5:05
  Dora: Or am I collapsing?
• 5:06
  Dora: Is it a freeze or fawn?
• 5:08
  Dora: Like, do I just paralyze myself?
• 5:11
  Dora: Awareness is power, and you cannot shift what you do not need.
• 5:16
  Dora: So identifying these things is super important.
• 5:19
  Dora: And quick disclaimer here: I am not a professional therapist.
• 5:23
  Dora: However, I have done a lot of these different modalities on myself, but I just want to invite you to have people in your corner, such as a therapist, a professional counselor, and someone that can help guide you through these things.
• 5:38
  Dora: Um, I definitely can become a resource, and I will definitely refer you to a resource that I know.
• 5:44
  Dora: Um, if there's something that we're not able to do in our time together, if you so choose.
• 5:48
  Dora: But that's where becoming aware of all these things is the first step in order to unlocking what is coming up for you and how to figure out your emotions because I didn't know there were so many emotions, and there was something when I was young, and especially working with my life coach at the beginning, years back, she taught me that I could be angry, and I was always taught to be the good girl, right?
• 6:13
  Dora: And good girls apparently couldn't be angry, that's what I thought.
• 6:16
  Dora: And one exercise she gave me to release some of this anger was to punch a pillow, and I punched it so hard, and there was a lot of anger I held inside, and I could never channel it out.
• 6:27
  Dora: So we can feel anger, and I could also feel happy at the same time, so it's not like you just choose one and that's it, it's not exclusive, and you can feel multiple things at the same time.
• 6:38
  Dora: So there you go.
• 6:38
  Dora: It's like a Dr.
• 6:39
  Dora: Pepper, right?
• 6:40
  Dora: 23 flavors or something, all in one.
• 6:42
  Dora: So there you go.
• 6:45
  Dora: Now let's practice a few grounding practices that I have as my go-to's in my toolbox, and so this is gonna help reset some of that nervous system and also ancestral and very simple grounding mechanisms.
• 7:02
  Dora: So, grounding practice number one, la respiración de raíz.
• 7:07
  Dora: This is where I call it the root breathing.
• 7:12
  Dora: So you can sit or you can stand, and I invite you to inhale through your nose for four, hold it for two, and then exhale for six.
• 7:21
  Dora: And that's where when you're doing this, you want to visualize the roots growing from the tailbone into the earth.
• 7:30
  Dora: So let's practice this together.
• 7:33
  Dora: Inhale for four, inhale through your nose, one, two, three, four, hold it at the top for two, and then exhale through your mouth for six.
• 7:41
  Dora: One, two, three, four, five, six.
• 7:45
  Dora: And then keep doing that rhythm.
• 7:47
  Dora: So inhale for four, hold it for two, and then exhale for six through your mouth.
• 7:56
  Dora: And then one more time, inhale through your nose.
• 8:00
  Dora: One, two, three, four, hold it at two, and then exhale for six.
• 8:10
  Dora: And you can say, I am sure I am supported, I can come back home and take as long as you need here.
• 8:24
  Dora: Now, practice number two is the five four three two one check-in.
• 8:29
  Dora: So this gives some somatic regulation.
• 8:33
  Dora: So let's start with five things you can see and scan the room.
• 8:38
  Dora: You can start from left to right and just scan the room on five things you can see.
• 8:50
  Dora: All right.
• 8:52
  Dora: Now we'll focus on four things you can touch.
• 8:55
  Dora: So something that's like I'm in my closet right now, so I'm gonna touch some fabric.
• 9:00
  Dora: Touch a purse.
• 9:02
  Dora: You can touch the four things.
• 9:07
  Dora: Next, you'll focus on three things you can hear.
• 9:12
  Dora: Right now, I can hear someone taking a shower in the next room.
• 9:17
  Dora: I hear a light buzzing, and I hear the TV at a distance.
• 9:24
  Dora: Now let's focus on two things you can smell.
• 9:28
  Dora: So I I put on my favorite perfume today, so you can smell that.
• 9:33
  Dora: And I'm gonna go ahead and smell an armpit.
• 9:37
  Dora: And then one thing you can taste or remember tasting.
• 9:41
  Dora: So today my mom came over and made enchiladas, and mmm, do I remember tasting them?
• 9:46
  Dora: I actually even shared them with a friend, so we stopped by at a friend's house to drop off some enchiladas.
• 9:52
  Dora: So I do remember the cheese enchiladas.
• 9:55
  Dora: She makes it without onion because I don't like onion.
• 9:58
  Dora: Now, this 54321, this pulls your nervous system out of the chaos and back into presence, uh back into this present moment.
• 10:09
  Dora: So practice this whenever you are feeling like kind of like out of like out of the ordinary, like everything's overwhelming and stuff.
• 10:19
  Dora: I like to do that when just to go come back to present moments, like here and then now and focus, refocus and reset.
• 10:27
  Dora: Now, this third grounding practice is a cold reset.
• 10:31
  Dora: So this is when you're in a panic, overwhelm, or spiraling thoughts.
• 10:35
  Dora: So I want you to go ahead and go to the nearest sink and splash some cold water on your wrists, or if you want on your face.
• 10:46
  Dora: You can also try holding an ice cube if you have ice near you or outside it's snowing.
• 10:52
  Dora: You can go outside and grab like some snow.
• 10:56
  Dora: And this also helps by stepping outside for uh fresh cold air, especially right now when it's winter in Chicago.
• 11:04
  Dora: You can also try putting your feet on the ground barefoot, and that's that gives you connection.
• 11:11
  Dora: And it could be cold on your feet.
• 11:15
  Dora: Usually in the summertime or when it's nice, I like to like step out in the grass and feel it, like with my bare feet.
• 11:22
  Dora: And this interrupts the panic signal and resets your vagus nerve, which is the receptor and the one that triggers all the stress in our bodies.
• 11:31
  Dora: The one other thing I love to do is put my hands in cold water and sing like happy birthday or the chinkle chinkle little star song.
• 11:38
  Dora: Those are the two things that's those are two songs that I go to for that as well.
• 11:43
  Dora: Now, my last grounding practice for you is an energetic limpia.
• 11:47
  Dora: And this I love because it comes from my ancestors, and it and the more I research the limpias, the more I see that there it is not only a Latin American culture, it's actually transcendent to different cultures, which is amazing.
• 12:00
  Dora: But I like to use my choice, you can use your choice of huevo, sage, palosanto, ruda, so rue, or a candle, and that's where you go ahead, and if you have the huevo, the egg, the sage, or the palo santo, or the rue, ruda, you can go through and just scan your body down the body and say, Todo lo que no es mío, se va, everything that I'm carrying that doesn't belong to me, release.
• 12:30
  Dora: And so you could do that, or you could say I release all negative energy three times.
• 12:34
  Dora: I love to do that with the palo santo, and you can always bring this ancestral grounding to you whenever you need it, and that's something that I go to all the time.
• 12:47
  Dora: And if you do an egg, I know how to read the egg and the different strands in that, and you could definitely send me your egg pictures.
• 12:52
  Dora: You could text it to me.
• 12:54
  Dora: Um, there's a spot down below in the show notes.
• 12:59
  Dora: And if anything, you can also reach out to me on Instagram at dPraxidis.
• 13:06
  Dora: After grounding comes recentering.
• 13:09
  Dora: So this is where you remember you're not the chaos, you're the what one witnessing it.
• 13:15
  Dora: You're the anchor.
• 13:18
  Dora: So let's recenter by asking what matters right now, in this exact moment.
• 13:26
  Dora: You can go ahead and grab your journal and see what comes up with this.
• 13:32
  Dora: Prompt number two.
• 13:34
  Dora: What do I need right now?
• 13:36
  Dora: Emotionally, physically, spiritually.
• 13:39
  Dora: Take a moment to really hone in on what that means for you.
• 13:48
  Dora: And prompt number three, what's mine to carry and what's not?
• 13:52
  Dora: So is there something that you've been carrying around?
• 13:56
  Dora: This is where your boundaries get born when you ask and meditate on these questions, where clarity starts to whisper to you, and where your true self gets louder than the noise.
• 14:07
  Dora: So make sure you take some space and pause this recording and take a moment to pause after each question and allow that space, that permission, to s to see what comes up for you in your body, in your mind, and if you're journaling, you can free write and see what comes up.
• 14:26
  Dora: Chaos is uncomfortable, but también is revelador, so it's also revealing.
• 14:31
  Dora: It shows you what triggers are still unhealed, where you're abandoning yourself, where you need support, what systems are no longer serving you, where your boundaries need strengthening, what season you're in energetically.
• 14:49
  Dora: Chaos doesn't come to destroy you.
• 14:51
  Dora: Chaos comes to redirect you, to peel back the layers of survival so the real you can breathe.
• 15:11
  Dora: Now let's do a guided meditation and something where we can ground as a ritual.
• 15:18
  Dora: And if you're safe in not driving or handling heavy machinery or of anything of the like, or taking care of the kiddos, I invite you to close your eyes and place one hand on your heart and one on your belly, lower belly, and repeat after me.
• 15:39
  Dora: I am safe in my body.
• 15:43
  Dora: I am held by my ancestors.
• 15:50
  Dora: I release what is not mine.
• 15:55
  Dora: I return to my center.
• 16:01
  Dora: I reclaim my peace.
• 16:06
  Dora: Now visualize the chaos swirling outside you.
• 16:12
  Dora: But you're standing in the middle like a rooted tree, unmovable, present, centered, guided, let go, and breathe.
• 16:40
  Dora: Take a deep breath in and out, and invite you to do that two more times.
• 16:51
  Dora: Take a deep breath in.
• 16:54
  Dora: And out through your mouth.
• 16:57
  Dora: And with this last one, I want you to take a deep breath in and hold it.
• 17:04
  Dora: Hold it.
• 17:07
  Dora: And I want you when you breathe out, really make some noise with the mouth.
• 17:16
  Dora: And when you're ready, you can open your eyes, wiggle your feet, your toes, your hands, and remember to come home to your body, to the present moment, but as a reset.
• 17:44
  Dora: So I want to share with you a few practical tips for real life chaos.
• 17:49
  Dora: Number one, don't respond when you're dehydr-dysregulated.
• 17:53
  Dora: I was gonna say dehydrated, but yeah, drink your water.
• 17:56
  Dora: Dysregulated.
• 17:57
  Dora: So your response requires regulation.
• 18:00
  Dora: So again, that emotional roller coaster, if you're on it, just make sure you're off of the roller coaster and the barf bag next to you if you need it.
• 18:09
  Dora: Do what you gotta do, but then that's when you step into regulated.
• 18:14
  Dora: Number two, build micro practices into your day.
• 18:18
  Dora: So you can count to you can count for 60 seconds, take that minute before going through those motions when you're going through chaos.
• 18:29
  Dora: Just take that minute.
• 18:31
  Dora: And I love to sit on the potty and take a minute, that's always my go-to as well.
• 18:36
  Dora: Number three, communicate your capacity so you can say and share with others something along the lines of right now, I can't hold this conversation, give me a moment.
• 18:46
  Dora: You always have the right to take time for yourself and come back when you're ready.
• 18:51
  Dora: You don't have to always handle the challenge right then and there.
• 18:56
  Dora: Number four, create an emotional emergency plan.
• 19:00
  Dora: So create these when you are like in a neutral state, your grounding tools list.
• 19:07
  Dora: So, what are things that ground you, such as the walking barefoot or the washing your hands with cold water, or things that we've discussed?
• 19:15
  Dora: Who's your go-to person if you're going through chaos?
• 19:18
  Dora: Like, do you call someone?
• 19:20
  Dora: Like, who are your favorites?
• 19:21
  Dora: Or if there's certain things that are for certain people, like I have a go-to person, like I'll have my best friend that I call when I'm going through something, especially when I got my cancer diagnosis.
• 19:32
  Dora: I called one of my good friends just to walk me through and like, okay, this is going on, and I'm going, you know, obviously it's overwhelming.
• 19:40
  Dora: And then also have your safe space.
• 19:42
  Dora: And honestly, my closet is my safe space.
• 19:45
  Dora: This is where I this is where I vibe, this is where I flow, this is where I get to change, this is where I feel safe in my ball chair.
• 19:56
  Dora: And then what are your practices?
• 19:58
  Dora: What are your go-tos?
• 20:00
  Dora: In your emotional emergency plan?
• 20:02
  Dora: Like, do you do yoga?
• 20:05
  Dora: Or do you like to move the body?
• 20:07
  Dora: Do you like to journal?
• 20:09
  Dora: Like, what are your things that you go to when you are going through chaos?
• 20:12
  Dora: Something chaotic, and it's sending you spiraling out of control.
• 20:16
  Dora: One of my favorite things that I like to practice all these tips with is when I'm going through a financial kind of scarcity mindset.
• 20:25
  Dora: Is instead of focusing on the worry, I now just try to regulate myself.
• 20:30
  Dora: And I try to go to like moving my body, moving the energy, writing it down.
• 20:36
  Dora: Um, and then I always my go-to is always like scripture, Bible is trying to go to a Bible verse or or listening to something motivational because that's going to lift my energy up.
• 20:48
  Dora: So number five is give yourself permission to pause.
• 20:51
  Dora: And that's where even in five minutes you can reset your entire day.
• 20:55
  Dora: And that's where in my teachings I also do the pause method.
• 21:00
  Dora: And that's definitely something if you want to explore, message me on Instagram, or you can send me a message down below.
• 21:08
  Dora: So as we recenter this identity, ask yourself who am I choosing to be in chaos?
• 21:18
  Dora: Not the old version of you, the healed one, the grounded one, the one who knows her worth, the one who doesn't abandon herself.
• 21:29
  Dora: Identity creates frequency.
• 21:32
  Dora: Frequency creates action.
• 21:34
  Dora: And the action creates reality.
• 21:38
  Dora: So be true to yourself, honor what's coming up, don't judge it, and just meet yourself where you're at right then and there.
• 22:04
  Dora: So chaos does not define you, your grounding does.
• 22:09
  Dora: So that's where you have the last word, you dictate how this ship's gonna go and how we're gonna sail it.
• 22:15
  Dora: And your awareness also does, your healing also does.
• 22:20
  Dora: So tu esencia, your essence, siempre te guia, it always guides you.
• 22:26
  Dora: If this episode supported you, share it with an hermana, a comadre, a sister, um, who's navigating her own storm.
• 22:34
  Dora: You can also tag me at the braxedis on Instagram, and let's keep healing juntos.
• 22:41
  Dora: And remember, embrace your raíces, reclaim your essencia.
• 22:44
  Dora: You are the medicine you've been searching for.
• 22:47
  Dora: Nos vemos hasta la próxima.
• 22:49
  Dora: Sending you so much love, big kiss, and I'll talk to you soon.
• 22:54
  Dora: Bye.