Latest / The Art of Love With Lucia / Episode 610: How Long Will It Take To Get My Ex Back?

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Episode 610: How Long Will It Take To Get My Ex Back? · The Art of Love With Lucia

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  Hi, this is Lucia with The Art of Love.
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  I'm a dating and relationship expert specializing in helping
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  you get your ex back or to get over your ex.
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  This week I want to answer the question, how long will it take
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  to get my ex back? Besides the question of whether
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  I will get my ex back, the second most asked question from
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  my clients is how long will it take?
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  Everyone wants their ex back as soon as possible and.
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  They make mistakes where it actually takes longer to get
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  their ex back. They become their own worst
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  enemy, and they're actually standing in their own way of
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  getting their ex back by trying to get them back as soon as
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  possible. You have to go slow initially in
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  order to go fast, because by trying to go fast, you'll
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  actually go slow. What do I mean by that?
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  Well, stay tuned and you'll find out first.
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  I have of course want to welcome back my beautiful no contact
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  army. If you haven't already, be sure
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  to download my app Solencio to help you stay in no contact and
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  give you a better chance to get your ex back.
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  And the link is below every single video and podcast.
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  And if you too would like to join our no contact army, all
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  you have to do is hit the subscribe button and the bell
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  notification and you're in. And to read on manual, go to
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  nocontactsecrets.com where you can read two free chapters
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  before purchasing the book. All right, so you want your ex
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  back, huh? Everybody wants their ex back
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  yesterday. Nobody wants to wait.
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  Everyone's in a hurry. That's because of the pain that
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  you're feeling, of course, and for some of you, the anxiety
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  that you're feeling. And also because we live in a
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  Society of instant gratification and we figure that everything
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  should be wrapped up neatly and back to normal within a very
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  short amount of time. And that's just not realistic
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  when it comes to getting your ex back.
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  So I said in the intro that in trying to go faster, you're
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  actually going to slow it down, and by going slow you're
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  actually going to speed it up. So what do I mean?
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  It means that trying to go fast means that you don't stay in no
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  contact. You contact your ex, you're
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  doing everything to get them back and that just pushes them
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  further away and makes them not want to deal with you and makes
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  them happy actually to have broken up with you.
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  Whereas if you. Go slow or it looks like you're
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  going slow and you don't contact them and you do nothing, as I
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  say to do, you are actually speeding things along.
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  You are actually going fast and the time will be shorter when
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  you're trying to get them back shortly after the breakup.
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  That does not work, as I talked about in my video about the
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  stages that a dumper goes through, and I'll put the link
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  up here in the right hand corner.
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  On YouTube, one of the first stages is relief.
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  So if they're in the relief stage, what makes you think that
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  they are going to want to get back in the relationship when
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  they are relieved to be out of it?
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  Well, they're not getting back, so leave them alone.
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  They have to be out of the relief stage and the sooner you
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  leave them alone, the quicker they'll be out of that stage.
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  As long as they are in relief, they ain't coming back.
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  Okay. And if you contact them when you
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  don't have to, for those of you that have to be in contact
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  because of children or work, again, you're going to prolong
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  the amount of time that they are in the belief stage, meaning
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  that it's going to take longer to get them back.
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  They need to miss you in order to start even thinking about
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  coming back. They can't miss you if you're
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  not gone. How can they miss you if you're
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  still around? And I talked about that in my
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  video, How to make Your Ex Miss you after a breakup.
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  And I will of course post the link in the right hand corner.
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  So This is why I say to do absolutely nothing during no
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  contact. Don't reach out.
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  Don't like their posts, don't respond to bread crumbs, don't
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  look at their stories, don't talk to their friends about
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  them. Nothing.
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  Be a ghost. Go into witness protection and
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  just disappear. The more things you do right
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  after a breakup, the sooner and the more likely it is that
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  you'll get your ex back. And the more things you do
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  wrong, the longer it will take to get your ex back and may even
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  prevent them from ever coming back.
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  You can't just go off of your feelings every time your
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  triggers like, oh, I'm going to contact them.
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  Nope, feelings do not have an IQ and they will betray you.
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  I suggest that instead, if you're triggered and you want to
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  contact your ex that obviously use my app Silencio, push the
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  panic button and also listen to my no contact playlist to
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  understand how to handle the time between when you were
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  broken up and when your ex contacts you.
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  Now when your ex broke up with you, they thought they were
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  making the right decision, they thought they could do better and
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  until they find out for themselves.
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  That they did not make the right decision, or that they can't do
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  better. They are not going to be
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  interested in coming back. This could take months, and
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  sometimes it can take years. A client of mine recently got
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  his ex back after a little over 2 years.
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  That's right, two years. Yes, it was a long journey.
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  He wasn't interested in anyone else.
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  He did date others, but he didn't find anyone he was more
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  interested in than his ex, and luckily he ran into her at the
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  grocery store. Things escalated from there and
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  they are now back together. So what does it matter how long
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  it takes to get your ex back as long as you finally get them
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  back, right? Think of it this way, even if
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  you win the lottery tomorrow for half a billion dollars, which is
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  possible with the jackpots these days, you still have to wait a
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  period of time to collect the money.
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  It's not like you win the money tomorrow and you get the check
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  the next day or whatever it is they give you.
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  But you're going to be happy to wait because you know that
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  eventually you're going to get that half a billion dollars,
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  right? So if you know that waiting and
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  being patient and not reaching out will give you your best
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  chance to win the lottery of getting your ex back, then who
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  cares whether it takes six weeks or six months or like my client,
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  two years? In the end, you're going to get
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  what you want. So just carry on with your life,
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  continue leveling up, and have faith.
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  In the knowledge that there is a chance to get your ex back if
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  they aren't 1000% done with you, which they usually aren't, and
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  if you do everything correctly after the breakup, then the
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  chances of them coming back sooner rather than later are
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  excellent. Okay.
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  So now I want to hear from you. How long have you been broken
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  up? I'm very curious to know how
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  long people have been waiting and if you would like my help to
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  get your ex back, like my client of two years hopefully won't
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  take two years with you. No, that's an exception.
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  Doesn't usually take that long. You can contact me at
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  theartoflove.net. The direct link is below every
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  single video and podcast and we will send you the rates.
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  If you're listening to this as a video, please like, subscribe
• 7:26
  and share. If you're listening to this as a
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  podcast, please rate and review and finally remember.
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  That love inspires, empowers, uplifts, and enlightens.