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Why Making More Money Feels Unsafe: Money Identity & Nervous System Healing · Regulating & Raising

• MaKenzie: All right, today's conversation is for the mom who is ready to make more money, build something of her own or step into a bigger version of her life. But every time she gets close, something in her body whispers, this is not safe. So I am joined by Amy, a money and empowerment coach, transformation expert and host of the Manifesting Millions podcast. Amy has spent over 20 years studying money, manifestation, and psychology, and she now helps women break through limiting beliefs around money to build confidence, freedom, and massive wealth on their own terms. So today we're gonna dive into one of the most invisible identities we carry as women, our money identity. So we are talking about what really happens in the body when income changes. the messy middle of stepping into a new version of yourself and the markers that prove the work is working, even when it does not feel like it yet. So this conversation, every mom needs to hear if she is ready to stop shrinking and start building. So Amy, I am so honored to have you here. Amy Diamond: I'm delighted to be here. Thank you for having me, Mackenzie. MaKenzie: All right, the first question that I've been dying to ask you is, know, money identity is one of the deepest and like I said, most invisible identities we carry. And so much of it is wired into our nervous system from childhood. So can you walk us through what is actually happening in the body when a woman's income changes, whether she steps away from corporate or build the business or maybe she's starting to earn more than she ever has? and her old identity is screaming at her that this is not a safe zone. And also talk to me about like what role does nervous system regulation play in being able to hold the version of herself that earns more, lives more freely and takes up more space. Amy Diamond: love the question, I'm going to start with an annoying answer to say, there's no there's no clear way to move through it. Let me give you some examples. When I was working in tech, I was doing very, very well. I had a moment where I was earning way more money than I'd ever experienced in my life. My chief concern was that I was now out earning my husband. So I had the conversation with him to say like, look, I'm still taking the promotion. I'm still taking the raise, but like, if this is going to be an issue for us, then let's talk about this head on. But in the increase, there was no, there's no dysregulation in my body of experiencing the increase. What I think helped a lot was that I was mentally preparing and already stepping into like, how would I move? What would I do differently with my income as it increased? One of the things that really helped, this is such a big thing for all of us as we are moving through increases in particular, find a place that all of your, I'll call it bills, your life necessities are covered. What is that amount that you need month over month? When we start creating increase, the natural tendency is to then also increase the circulation that goes out. And that's actually your nervous system is attempting to try to hold this stasis of, hey, we're used to having this much money coming in and this much money coming out. And if we can keep that match going, then we're okay. But what happens when we're doing that is that then we are earning more, but we keep looking at our bank account going, What the hell? Like I'm making twice what I was making a year ago, but I don't have any more money in my bank account. For a lot of us, this is where we start to go. Something's not right. If we can shift it right from the beginning, because it's harder to pull back. Typically we find ourselves, you know, we've found some creature comforts that we really like that we don't want to give up. And so we're like, well, how do I change this? If we can do that from the beginning. So we know we're heading into a season of increase, whether it's a promotion, whether your business starts doing well, whatever it is, and move through that from the pattern of, okay, I'm going to keep all of my expenses, the bills, the money circulating out, basically the same. And then look at that increase to go, so this is still me, I can handle this very well, I've had a ton of time doing this. And this increases the place for me now to go, Well, what would feel good to do with that money? So maybe it's we're paying debt. Maybe it's putting money in savings. Maybe it's, you know, I don't know, going on a honeymoon or a baby moon or a vacation or whatever. But instead of going into an immediate need to spend, that's what happens. Our nervous system is going, whoa, I'm like feeling all this increase and I need to make it go away. And it's very subtle. MaKenzie: Hmm. Amy Diamond: And you won't even notice it. This is the thing, because we're so socialized to go shopping, to feel better, to treat ourselves to like spa treatments and stuff. None of that is wrong. But if you aren't paying attention, your body will just quietly make sure that you're staying in this same sort of homeostasis of, we have this much coming in and so therefore we have this much coming out. It's not logical. And that's the part that most people get tripped up on. like, well, this doesn't make any sense. I know. That's not the point. Our nervous system isn't here to speak to us in a logical manner. Our nervous system is here to make sure that like no matter what happens, we're used to this feeling. MaKenzie: So, so good. Because I can relate to that like so much in my own journey. So many of the moms in my audience have spent, you know, years of overworking, over giving. Amy Diamond: Mm-hmm. MaKenzie: burning out and then they wonder like why money feels so hard. So from your perspective, like how does living out of alignment with how we are actually wired like as a woman's like relationship with money, like her ability to receive and the income ceilings that she keeps hitting, like what changes when she finally starts making money from a place of alignment instead of force? Amy Diamond: Okay, so the first thing that we have to talk about is social conditioning. Men and women are conditioned extremely differently when it comes to money. It's beginning to change. We're starting to see the stories shift, but we have to keep in mind that there's generations of conditioning and pre-programmed beliefs and patterns and paradigms that exist within us, right? One of the things that I love to talk about, everybody's like, get out of the scarcity mindset. I'm like, that will never happen because the oldest part of your brain is hardwired to monitor for scarcity. That's how we manage to make it through the however many thousands of years that humans have existed to be here today. So it's not about trying to change that. It's understanding that that is happening. So what happens when we are thinking about, you know, we're overworking, we're burning out, while we are starting to shift the social story that says men are the earners and women are the caretakers. What we have not shifted is that a woman's primary job is to take care of every single other person above herself at all times. And as moms that gets like 10x'd, right? You are in a way kind of required you have to take care of this little tiny human and make sure that they don't die. so when especially when they're really young, you're giving so much of yourself to take care of this little creature, make sure that they're healthy and happy and growing and have everything that they need to. The tricky thing is being able to start to shift when the season changes. When we start to see that there is some independence happening in our little ones, that's actually should be our cue to go, okay, hang on. They're like figuring some things out on their own. And what an amazing thing for them to do. Cause as the human that they are developing into, they actually need that. And this is now my calling to say, okay, it's actually time for me to shift where I'm giving energy. Now, The important thing is to realize that that giving does not mean always out. The hardest thing for women to do is actually to give to ourselves. It's insane. It's something that I'm very confused about and like it, I find it very frustrating, but it is actually the hardest thing. I will spend hours like baking an amazing cake for my nieces and nephews. I will spend... you know, hours like cutting the grass and doing the dishes and making the meals and making sure that like when my husband comes home from work, things are pretty prepped and like he can chill and relax. But the mere idea of taking 20 minutes to just like have a nap, I have to go through so much like internal jungle gym stuff to be like, you know, it's okay. You're allowed to like take a nap and give back into ourselves. So the trick is it's a, it's a little bit of a mental and a nervous system. And this is where I said at the very beginning, there's no clear answer because it isn't one step that we do one time and then we're done. You're going to make progress. You're going to have the mental side where you're saying, it's completely okay for me to give in to myself. It's completely okay when we come to talk about money. It's okay to put money into my retirement versus into my kids' college fund. or it's okay to put money into a savings account versus, you know, getting, I don't know, like this extra level of groceries or different kind of clothes for my kids or paying for more school programs, whatever it is. We need to begin to mentally talk ourselves through that and then notice, and that's the hard part actually, is noticing when is our body saying, well, hey, what's happening here? and it'll be very, very quiet and you'll find yourself, you'll over index, you'll feel guilty or ashamed or like you're being a bad mom or something like that as it relates to, you're giving into yourself, which we're not socially conditioned to be okay with. So naturally your body is going to try to find a way to over index and give into somebody else. And you're going to do that by accident a few times. And then you're going to go, what the hell was I doing? Why am I doing it this way? And you're going to go, right, okay, because I'm actually learning this new way of being I'm learning this new way of operating with money as my income increases. This is meaning these things, but I haven't been trained for that. From birth, I've been trained to just give and give and give and give and always on the outside. So now it's actually a way for me to figure out balancing the two. And there are seasons for overwork. Babies are little, businesses are new, careers are growing. And there are seasons for us to go, you know, it's okay if I can just like chill and watch some YouTube. My husband can do that like a boss. I'm just like, I don't understand. You could just watch YouTube for hours. I cannot, but I could read for hours. And I had to really do the work to go, you know, it's okay for me to do that. I don't have to like qualify for the time to sit and pour into myself. MaKenzie: for sure. So one thing that's been working for me and going through what Amy is talking about is birthdays. I used to just say like, my birthday's no big deal, just another day. And I'm like, last year, I completely changed my mindset. And I was like, no, like I have had three babies. I am a mom, I'm running a business. Like I am doing... everything for everybody and this is one day for me. So I have started the trend that I take myself to the happiest place that I know right now, which is 30A, Florida. We actually just got back from it Saturday. So my birthday was last week. So like I'm fresh off of it. Thank you. But it's also Mother's Day too in the same week. So it is like. Amy Diamond: Happy belated birthday. Right. MaKenzie: a double whammy, but doing things like that for yourself, and I can tell, I come back and I wanted to dive into my business, I'm ready to, I feel like a better mom, I just got the space and did something for myself. So what she's saying, it works. You do have to treat yourself, you have to be a little bit selfish, and that's what I've realized through my journey. And that makes me a better mom, like to go get my nails done and to like, you know, buy, you know, a really nice hat that I like. I do put myself first and it's made a world of a difference. Amy Diamond: Well, I mean, everybody cites the example like you're on the airplane, right? Put your own oxygen mask first. And I love that they always call out, parents, put your oxygen mask on first before you help your littles. Let's talk about that word selfish for just a very quick second. We have this, and again, it's been very, very, very strongly conditioned that selfishness means that you are doing things to the exclusion and the detriment of everybody else. But that's actually not true. There are people, of course, that are operating in a way that is doing it that way. But to be self-ish, you're saying, okay, I'm focusing into myself. And to just, let's turn this on its head for a half a second. We think that it's selfish in a bad way to pour into ourselves, but could we consider that perhaps it's even worse to consider that everybody else is supposed to pour into us? in order for us to feel okay. That just seems kind of silly, right? And they're always gonna get it wrong no matter how hard they try because they don't actually know what we need, what we want. And sometimes we can't articulate it. The amount of times that I'm just like, I don't know what I need, but I just, blah. And so then I go for a run or I make a cake or whatever. But this idea that focusing into ourselves is selfish in a bad way. we can start to play with that and turn it on its head and go, okay, I'm not the kind of person who is going to focus in on me to the detriment of everybody around me. And if we're really going to call a spade a spade, everybody around me is actually going to benefit hugely from me focusing into myself for a little moment of time and doing this thing that feels good and doing this thing that is joyful for me. So when we can start to, but it takes that reminder. We have to remind ourselves that like, it's not just that it's okay. Of course it's okay. But if we can start to alter how we perceive this idea of selfishness and go, you know, maybe it's worth considering that it's actually a worse version of being selfish. If I assume everybody else is required to pour into me in order for me to feel okay. And I just want to say, I love that you are like, owning your birthday and taking it on. Everybody who knows me and my personal sphere knows that the most important day of the year in Amy's life is August 31st because that is my birthday. It is the day that it's all about me. We go to the mountains. We do things that feel really, really, really great. My husband after 13 years still hasn't quite clued in that like this is the day that everything matters. But when people go, I've had lots of people in my life that have said similar to you. MaKenzie: Mm-hmm. Amy Diamond: That's just another day. It's not a big deal. How is it not a big deal? It is the day you like arrived onto the planet as this lovely little creature that you are that deserves to be celebrated. Yeah. Yes. Yeah. 100%. MaKenzie: Yeah. Yeah! Nobody else is like you. Thank God. It's so beautiful. One thing that I've learned lately in healing my relationship with money is that you have to spend time with it. That's one thing that I'm kind of experimenting with. So investing in certain courses, I have a money day on Monday. Usually I do some money education. You got to... To learn about it, you got to spend time with it. You can't avoid it. I feel like it was a misconception that maybe I had or somewhere along the line that if you just manifest it, will all just come to you. But that's not the case. So can we talk about that scenario and what your take is on that? Amy Diamond: So here's the thing about money. You said a really lovely thing at the beginning that you talked about our relationship with money is one of the most invisible relationships that we have. It is considered gauche, not okay. all kinds of like gross vibes for us to have desires for what I'll call excessive wealth. It's, considered to be okay if you're like getting by, taking care of your family. Maybe, maybe you can afford to go on a vacation, but if you start talking like, Hey, I want to have multiple millions. People are like, you know, life's not all about money. The thing that I've been trying to figure out is, okay. MaKenzie: Or they're like, that will never happen. feel like they're like, that's not real life. And I'm like, no, I know people who make a million in a day. Amy Diamond: Yes! Yeah! Yeah, yeah, of course, maybe it's not real life for you and it doesn't need to be real life for you, but that doesn't mean that that desire that I have is any less real, right? The thing that I've been trying to figure out and I have yet to figure out is there is no way to decouple from money in the world. MaKenzie: Yeah. Amy Diamond: We, it's like, it is as silly to say, don't think about money, don't focus on money, try just to like, you know, manifest it in. It's like, well, what does that even mean to just manifest it in? Because then someone will say, I was just lucky. I just happened to meet this person. it's, you know, whatever, I work really hard for it. It's my favorite one. really work hard for it. You deserve it. You know, you don't have to work hard for it. You just get to have it. Like, that's okay. It's like oxygen. There's not a single human on the planet that goes, okay, I need to like really focus on oxygen. I need to really believe that I deserve to have it, that it's okay for it to be around me in like absolute abundance and like for everything. Like I don't have to prove to somebody that I've done enough work to earn having enough molecules of oxygen to keep myself going. Of course not. If money was something that like we could exist in the world without, then perhaps those things might make more sense. But there isn't a way to exist in the world without money. Now, way, way, way back when, like deep in the history of money, money obviously did not always exist. It actually was created because our societies were becoming bigger and more complex. there was always some means of exchange and that's really all that money does. It's a way for us to exchange across like things that make sense, right? Inflow, outflow, totally. Yeah. So, but we've, we've made it mean all these like gross things. I love that you have a money date. Part B, I have never, I think I've had one money date in my life. MaKenzie: and flow outflow, like, yeah, so flow. Isn't it so funny how everybody's just wired differently and we're both generators too, which is another crazy thing. So it means that there's different layers of the human design types and how we work. Amy Diamond: Yes. Yeah. Correct. So I think what happened was, I'm going to say 10 to 15 years ago, people who were further along the energetic path started talking about money in a different way. And so they said, go on money dates with the intention of imagine like just changing how you relate to money. When we think about dating as it relies to, because really the only place that exists otherwise is a romantic relationship, we We see it as a place of like exploration. We're testing out, this person a good fit? It feels joyful. It feels exciting. And the times that it falls flat, you're like, cool, that person's not a match for me. Maybe a waste of time, but whatever, I got a free dinner, right? Like those are the things we think about. Using a money date to make it okay for you to start to explore. What does this feel like to me? How do I, how am I relating to this? Does it feel good or am I kind of like, crap, I gotta go sit down with my money, right? So we don't have to do money dates, but it is really. powerful when we allow ourselves to start stepping into a place of kind of looking at it and going, okay, what, how am I relating into this? And does it feel good? And what might I want to change? And what are the things that I'm not even aware of that I'm doing? It's a little bit like, I said this years ago, I said a sentence to my younger sister and then slapped my hand across my mouth and I was looking around at something and I was like, my God, we just live like pigs. And I was like, did that happen? How did my mother just come out of my mouth? The same thing happens in our money. The exact same thing happens in our money, but they are... There's no, I'll call it no auditory, no visual necessarily for us to go, my gosh, I just did that exactly the same as my parents do. Here's an example for how we can start to practice some awareness. And because nobody talks about money, and this is the part that I find so challenging. So my dad had a business for 32 years. had a long haul transport company. like, I grew up around Kenworth trucks and big long trailers and like very cool things. And a few years ago, he finally closed the business. Now, all the way through, we never ever talked about money, but I have only ever, of course, observed him moving through the business, doing different things and how he energetically was showing up. Literally in the last nine months, I don't know what has changed. I'm so here for it. but we've started having conversations a little bit about money and his approach. And he just said, he'd say things like, I never had a budget for building a shop. I just would go to the bank and say, I need this much money. And then if I need more, I go back and say, I need more. And I was like, wait, that's how I operate. I'm like, I don't understand. It was for so long I would I would do these things. I have no issue taking a risk. I have no issue investing in a business. I have no issue like putting myself out there financially, especially in order to build the dream. But I couldn't figure out why do I seem to do it so differently from everybody else around me? And then my dad says this to me and I'm like, my God, that's exactly where you learned it from. So when we. Right, when we start to. MaKenzie: Mm-hmm. So funny. Amy Diamond: of look at some of the ways that we're operating and go, cool okay so that's a learned behavior. The next natural question is well how do we start to shift the behavior? One of the things that I want to very very clearly say so much of teachings and work around money and and altering our relationship and experience with money talks about limiting beliefs. Of course we have limiting beliefs. MaKenzie: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Amy Diamond: We also have really amazing beliefs. MaKenzie: Mm, totally. Amy Diamond: We don't honor those enough. We don't recognize those enough. It is very, very easy to have a look at this experience of, my God, like I have no problem taking risk and just like, you know, really investing in, but like, man, it's creating this like, why am I always in debt? Why am I always feeling this way? Why am I always feeling strapped? Why does it feel like my back's always against the wall? And so we want to change that. But can we talk about the fact that there's a huge amount of people who have no ability to take risk at all? MaKenzie: No. Amy Diamond: Like that is actually a really, really impressive paradigm to have that in place and go, whoa, okay. So like to build something big, you need to have an ability to weather through some risk and to have some things go completely sideways. And you're like, well, shit, like that didn't work out like I wanted. the thing, actually the thing that I'm working my way through right now is MaKenzie: Go. Yes. Amy Diamond: how am I recognizing and honoring the winds when they don't look like giant winds? Because that was never ever something that was talked about in our house. So this is actually the learning that I need to do, not how to weather risk. That part I've got down, that is such a supportive belief paradigm that I picked up. from observing my father and my mom, they're both entrepreneurs. So it's in my blood, which I remind myself of the days that I feel frustrated. They're like, why do I want to go down this pathway? We want to understand that we have some really supportive beliefs because when we can start to see the two of them, it's like if you were married and your husband, all you ever looked at in a relationship with your husband were the things that were limiting and that were frustrating you. MaKenzie: Mm-hmm. Amy Diamond: Well, eventually you're going to get really resentful of him. Really like, can you do anything right? Could you please just show up in my life in a good way? My focus with my husband, even on the days that I want to like push him in front of a bus. OK, he's a really great guy. He's you know, maybe he doesn't have this part figured out, but he he's smart. He's funny. He's kind. He's warm. He's loving. He's you know, I. MaKenzie: Yeah. Amy Diamond: Remind myself I'm aware of this thing that's going on that I don't love but my focus always holds on the things that are good because I am aware that if I start holding all of my focus on the things that aren't great and then trying to change those I've completely missed the point. MaKenzie: This is so gold. I have also started to transform the way that I teach my clients and just my process of, I don't know, healing or whatever you want to call it, what I've changed is just focused on the expansion. the gratitude first, like you're already held, and that has changed my world, there was a topic about feminine and masculine and energy a lot lately, and that I feel like correlates into the money portion. And so... somebody had said, household. And honestly, like I am realizing that like, I'm better equipped for it though too. And actually, like what you're saying, looking at that as an amazing thing, because my dad, he's no longer with us, but he was an entrepreneur. He was a risk taker. He loved investing money. And I just started getting into investing money and myself within like the last year. And in this call, though, somebody was like, disgusting. Like, why would you want to invest in money? And it kind of like took me aback. Like, that's a you know, that's too masculine energy. And I'm like, but it kind of like brought me closer to my dad. So it was like, I don't know, very like disrupting to me. And whenever I have like reflected on it the past like couple months, I'm like, you know what? Like, no, like this is who I am. This is what I love to do. This brings me, I feel like joy and makes me feel, you know, a connection with my father. So I'm gonna continue to do this. So I'm just saying like, where I'm going with this is like taking little things from my dad and like just in my money. routines and looking at them as like more positive changed. Amy Diamond: And like, what a perfect example of someone reflecting back what we have been taught to believe about money. If you were to say, listen, I'm going to invest, we're going to go slightly R rated everybody, buckle up. If I were to invest money into having ridiculously great sex with my spouse, people will be like, ooh, they'd be a little like, I don't know what to ask you about this. Like, I feel like we're not supposed to talk about this, but there wouldn't really be any shade thrown on that because they'd be like, well, who doesn't want really awesome sex in their life? we know how powerful that is to build that passion in a relationship, to really like glue a relationship together. But the minute we start saying like, you know what, I really want to invest in like building money in my life, building my money knowledge, growing my income, growing the resources I have available, people are like, gross. MaKenzie: especially with their wife. Amy Diamond: Why would you do that? That's icky. That's guys do that. Why? Why do guys do that? Why can we create actual beings from our body using nothing but two cells, but somehow it's not okay for us to go, you know, I could take $2 and make them into like a million dollars. Why is that? Right? It seems so illogical when we start to think about it that way, but that's actually the biggest part of the many work as it relates to each of us in our lives is understanding that those things that people are saying back to us is only a reflection of what they still believe to be true. And I try to remind myself even on the days that like it hurts and I kind of want to punch a wall that I'm like, okay, you know what? I actually feel for them. that they are still locked in these old paradigms, that they are still more invested in the idea that growing money is bad, that having money is bad, that focusing on increasing money in my life makes me greedy or makes me selfish or makes me bad. It's a shame that they feel and believe that way. And it's now my choice to go, am I gonna index more on what they're saying and agree with them? Or am I gonna go, Well, I am already aware that that is actually a broken paradigm. And I've tried that paradigm. Didn't feel great. So perhaps I try something different because very few of us, there's probably some, but like I'd have to go find them. Very, very few of us want increase in dollars in our lives just to like sit on it and like have a picture of us sitting in our stacks of cash. Most of us, the vast, vast majority of us, want to have more increase so that we can do more things. Take our families on vacation, pay our mortgage off sooner, buy a bigger house so the kids don't have to share bedrooms, have a car that feels reliable, have a retirement savings so that we know that when we are done being, you know, producers and creative experts in the world, that we're financially taken care of. We don't become a burden or a draw on the people in our lives. What about that is greedy and selfish? Like it seems silly, right? And so if we can just keep reminding ourselves of that, and it does, takes, because the money beliefs that we are built in is built in as deeply as our scarcity programming. It's just deep inside our brains. And it doesn't mean that we have to fight it. It definitely doesn't mean that we have to like heal everything. I mean, I love that you said like I'm, don't love the idea of healing because it had me thinking I have a scratch on my ankle no idea where it came from for two days it's been on my ankle and it's been driving me crazy because it sits against my leg shoe and this morning I'm like you know Amy if we have boo-boos we just put a band-aid and some polysporin on it and it goes away in two days that's it our money doesn't work quite as quickly and it's not about like making the money boo-boo go away it's about going You there might be a better way to operate with this. Maybe one of these things needs a bandaid. Maybe one of these things just needs me to is asking me to show up differently. MaKenzie: and finding what works for you. I am investing in coaches all the time, which has been another thing that's like life-changing that I feel like more people do not do, which needs to be a trend. feel like if you're not investing in yourself, like you're not growing. Like you can only get so far on Chappie GT and Claude. But your intuition, like listening to your body and yourself like is your foundation. Amy Diamond: Mm-hmm. MaKenzie: And it's, like you said, it's so much harder to do the work than to just say it. But I feel like the change will happen. Do you feel like that? Amy Diamond: Yeah. Yeah. And let's talk about that for a second, because here's the thing that is hard for us to understand. our intuition, I'm sure that you and most of your audience are very aware, your intuition is the part that speaks quietly. It doesn't panic. It doesn't freak out. It's not like, my God, like pull the cord. Things are going back. No, that's not how our intuition speaks. However, money is a lived thing. We, we feel it in our bodies. And if you're like, Amy, that's not true. then I would dare you to like get a bill that you have no friggin idea how you're going to pay for and tell me that your physiology doesn't change or that you just won, I don't know, $62 million and that your physiology does not change. Of course it does. Money is an experience that we feel in our body. When we are tuning into our intuition, which also comes from our body, it's very, very quiet and soft. And because it's coming through our body and our nervous system is also of course part of our body, it's not so much that we can maybe get the wires crossed, but we hear the intuitive thing. Like I'm going to just say this right now. When I am, I never planned to teach money. there's never been like no point ever in my life was like, I think that at some point I'm going to build a business teaching people about money. Like, no. And even now I'm just like, what am I even doing? Doing this kind of work. But the call kept coming in and I kept hanging up the phone. Like, I'm sorry, I think you've called the wrong person. It just quietly kept coming in and it kept coming in. And when it would, I would hear it and my body would go, I can't do that. That's not okay. But eventually it came in enough times that I'm like, okay, I'm really over having this call, keep coming in, what do want from me? So I started leaning into it to go, what is it that I could be doing with this? All the way through though, I'll call it the work, is in a way like reminding my body that it's okay, reminding myself that it's okay. stepping into this space of going, okay, everybody needs this. Nobody wants to talk about this. And yet I think I'm brave enough to go into this arena, but holy shit, does it scare the crap out of me. And allowing yourself to be aware that that intuitive feeling, intuitive movements through your money, There are going to be things that just don't make any sense, but pay attention when your body starts to go a little haywire because that doesn't mean that your intuition is wrong. It just means that your nervous system is like alert, alert, alert. We're about to operate in a way that we have never done before. We don't know if we can survive this, you know, all hands on deck. We might die. That's actually what your nervous system is trying to tell you. It's just trying to say like, please don't kill us. We want to keep surviving and we only know how to 100 % survive what we have already done. MaKenzie: And do you agree that like you must like process that to get to the other side? Amy Diamond: Yes and no. think that one of the tricky things, and I certainly like, if you were to look it up in the dictionary, there's a picture of my face right next to it of like, keep processing until it feels better. She needs to let go of this. So yes and no, we don't want to ignore it because that's not going to help us. And the thing is, my love so much, there's that saying of like, You know, if God wants to get your attention first, they'll throw a pebble. And then if the pebble doesn't work, they throw a rock. And then if that doesn't eventually throw you a boulder and you're just like, what the hell? Like God's like, I've been trying to get your attention for a while. So we are aware that just ignoring this is not helping. But I think the mistake is if we feel like we need to process it before we can move forward, we process as we move forward. And in fact, moving forward is of the processing. So this is why I say yes and no. Yes, it's important to process through and sometimes it's going to look really simple like a quick conversation in your head. Sometimes it's going to look like, you know, a few days or weeks sitting down with your journal. It depends on what it is that you're altering. So very, very, very layered. One of the big things that MaKenzie: And I feel like sometimes it's layered too. Amy Diamond: is really present in my life right now is a what I can really only describe as a massive shift in my identity in particular as it relates to money and even more in particular as it relates to earning through a business. I have no issue earning in a job very very good at it have no like my nervous system doesn't go crazy as it relates to earning money in a job but earning money through a business is a whole different realm. I just have been looking at my life and looking at like, what is existing in reality in the last two and a half years have been very, very difficult for me, like on a personal level. And I was like, Honest, I can't make this up. I was sitting on the toilet. I was just thinking about this and I was like You know what burn it all down MaKenzie: I love the honesty. Amy Diamond: If I need to burn everything to the ground to get out of this, then burn it all down because I am so tired of sitting in this constant like muddy water and feeling like I'm working so hard to do all the things right and nothing seems to be working. And if we have to burn the whole friggin show to the ground, then burn it to the ground. And that feels terrifying because nobody is like, hey, that sounds like a great idea. Like, let's just burn everything to the ground. Yeah. But it also was very clear. I know this. I know this in myself. I've had some pretty wild experiences in my life where things have burned down around me. And I know that everything and everyone who is intended and ready to go to the next level with me, they will come. MaKenzie: Right. Right. All your effort. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Amy Diamond: I don't have to fight for them. I don't have to convince them of it. I don't have to prove myself worthy of them. They will be there. The ones who are not will fall away. That sucks. It hurts. It makes you question everything. But the willingness to go, I'm tired of holding onto this and trying to tweak it. So I'm like, burn it all to the ground. And I got to tell you in the last week, the stuff that has been coming through that has been saying to me, Amy, you need to look at this. You need to have a look at this. You need to have a look at this. And I'm like, OK. And one of the messages that has been coming through so clearly has been to say, you don't need to stop everything and try to process and figure it out and be like perfect in this. Like, what is my new identity? How is my new paradigm? Hold the question and keep going forward. Follow the taps that are saying, hey, here's this thing that's coming up for you. Step into it fully. Today is a great example. Like 20 minutes before you and I sat down to have our conversation, I updated my Instagram handle and I changed it to be, it's actually XO Amy Diamond. And I sat with this for like two weeks. Like, can I really be Amy Diamond in the world? Is that what that looks like? I'd only ever operate it as my full like first and last legal name, but it has just been coming through. This is actually in the realm of the work that you are meant to do in the realm of how you are meant to help people and how to connect. This is the thing. I didn't go from like reaction of, God, OK, I'm just going to like blow out and do everything. I let it sit. I let it settle. And then then there was just this knowing. I think it was actually filling out the form that like you sent out, which I was like, I'm so sorry I didn't send this to you earlier, but holy moly, what a perfect time. Cause it was just everything in my body went quiet and it said, it's time we're ready. Let's do it. And that's the, that's the processing. That's the movement. We, we grow as we move, which all of us know logically, we all know this, but it feels scary as heck. And we're just like, my God, am I doing the right things? And you're never going to know. Little challenge for the moms out there. How much are you using your kids as an excuse to stay safe? One of my dearest friends, she, so I live in Calgary. She lived in Calgary as well. And for years, she's a hairstylist. So she'd do my hair and we'd talk while I was in the chair. And she'd talk about how she just like really didn't like the vibe of Calgary and was really done with the people and was really done with the whole thing. And she'd been talking for like three years, I feel like, of how she just wanted to go to Mexico. And I was probably the only person in her life that was like, so go. And she was like, I can't. You know, like her youngest was probably 12 or 13 at the time when she first started talking. She's like, she's still in school. When she graduates, then then I can go. And I just she. But she talked about it for years. And then finally one day she says to me, Amy, OK, we're going to go to Mexico. We're going to go for like six months. And that way she doesn't miss too much school and we're going to see how it goes. And I just I said to her, I kind of laughed and I was like, I know you think you're going for six months, but like you're not coming back. And she's like, yes, I am. I'm going to come back in six months. And I'm like, okay, I'm excited to see you when you're back in six months, but I'm pretty sure you're not going to come back. And sure enough, she she's come back to visit, but she hasn't come back to live. And she's like, I didn't think this would happen. I said, of course it would happen. It's where your heart wanted to be. And it just took you a few years. She ended up moving when her youngest was, I think, 15 or 16. So still in school. They had to figure out this whole different way of like, how do I finish my high school and like learn all the things while I'm in this other country? And there's regulations about attending school in Canada. And anyway, all the things. But she said only afterwards, this has actually been really good for her, for her daughter, that it's it's really like shown her a different way, which is what this is not. Yeah, and this is not me being like, I told you so. But this is the thing that I think I find so. MaKenzie: Yeah. Well, she's regulated, it's co-regulation. Amy Diamond: very sorry, frustrating when I see parents talk about this, that they use their kids as a reason to stay in what is comfortable and what is safe. It's when, you know, a couple stays together under the guise of like, well, we don't want to put our kids through a divorce. Cool. So instead, you're going to model what an unhappy, unhealthy relationship is going to be for them while they're at their most impressionable ages. That doesn't seem like a good idea to me. MaKenzie: Yeah. Amy Diamond: Divorce sucks. Don't get me wrong, but I got to tell you a lot of what I learned watching my parents and living through my parents going through a very, very messy divorce has turned me into a person who can operate in the world in a more powerful way. I'm not recommending it like, Hey, going through a divorce with your parents is awesome. This is how we can grow. But I think I really want to challenge if you keep saying when my when my son is older, when my daughter is older, when the youngest one hits, I don't know, preschool, when they graduate high school, when, if you are using their life as markers for when it's okay for you to do the thing that's on your heart, I'm gonna challenge you straight up and go, you're actually using them to stay safe. And that's actually really unfair to them. Yeah, and it's unfair to them. Why would you hang all of that, they might not know it, but that weight on them? MaKenzie: Yep. And you're letting them dictate your life, too. Amy Diamond: They're gonna learn so much from watching you go hard after your dreams. And you're gonna fall on your face and you're gonna be like ugly crying in the kitchen. And then you're gonna like try to clean it up when they come in like everything's fine, everything's fine. But I gotta tell you, they will learn so much more from watching you go through that, from standing in what feels scary AF and you're trying to be brave and you're trying to do all the things even as you are also raising a family. You're gonna inspire them so much more than you could by just going, I'll wait till they're like done high school and then I'll go do the things. MaKenzie: Amen. Just do it. If you have the urge, do it. why don't you share with us where we can find you and any resources that you have that would better prepare us for our money mindset. Amy Diamond: Just do it. I love it. So as I mentioned, I've just updated my Instagram handle. You can find me at XO Amy Diamond. All one word. You mentioned earlier that I have the Manifesting Millions podcast. So that's a podcast that I publish every week. We talk about all kinds of things. Definitely money. I will say that if you've got littles in the car, maybe have some headphones because some episodes are spicier than others. Yeah. And then there's a MaKenzie: little spicy chip. Amy Diamond: a free three-day private podcast that I developed called Unapologetic Abundance. And what it is is that we take three key things that are standing in the way of most of us, especially at the start of our money journey and definitely as we're ready for an expansion with money. We talk about money shame, we talk about perfect timing, and we talk about our ideal state. And inside that private audio, I offer you reframes and alterations to the paradigms that you're holding to be able to go maybe this actually could be upgraded and updated in a better way. So to get a hold of that I'm sure you'll put the link in the show notes. The URL currently is amyvanmiel.com forward slash unapologetic. MaKenzie: I love it. I'm gonna grab it as well. Well, thank you so much for your time, Amy, and I cannot wait to talk again soon. Amy Diamond: Yay. Yeah, that would be awesome. Thank you for having me, Mackenzie. This has been a lot of fun. MaKenzie: I love it.