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Why Our Family Does Halloween Differently · Praise, Prayer & Protein

• 0:09
  SPEAKER_00: Hey, I'm Kate, mom of seven, coffee lover, and believer in finding joy in every season of motherhood.
• 0:16
  SPEAKER_00: This is Praise, Prayer, and Protein, where we talk faith, family, frugal living, and the real life mom hacks that make it all work.
• 0:24
  SPEAKER_00: Let's dive in.
• 0:26
  SPEAKER_00: Hey friends, and welcome back to another episode of Praise, Prayer and Protein.
• 0:32
  SPEAKER_00: So today I'm doing something a little bit different, and I have to admit, I have gone back and forth about whether I wanted to record this episode or not because we are going to be talking about Halloween.
• 0:45
  SPEAKER_00: And I know this is one of those topics where people have some really strong opinions.
• 0:51
  SPEAKER_00: But with Halloween coming up this weekend, I thought it would be a good time to have this conversation, especially because it is a question that I do get asked quite often.
• 1:02
  SPEAKER_00: People ask why our family doesn't go trick-or-treating, what we do instead, and how we have navigated Halloween with seven kids and as a family.
• 1:13
  SPEAKER_00: Last year I had the opportunity to go on the Back Corner podcast and talk with Pastor Brent and Pastor AJ on this topic.
• 1:20
  SPEAKER_00: We had a conversation about it during my visit there.
• 1:24
  SPEAKER_00: And then recently I was listening to their episode last week and a viewer had a question about Halloween.
• 1:32
  SPEAKER_00: You can check that in the show notes.
• 1:33
  SPEAKER_00: My episode on there, I'll have it there.
• 1:36
  SPEAKER_00: So I thought, um, you know what, maybe it's time I share a little bit more about um how we've approached Halloween as a family.
• 1:45
  SPEAKER_00: I can share about it here on our podcast.
• 1:48
  SPEAKER_00: But before I get into anything, I need to make something really clear.
• 1:52
  SPEAKER_00: This episode is not telling you and your family what you should or shouldn't do.
• 1:57
  SPEAKER_00: It is not about making anyone feel guilty, and it's definitely not about judging people who celebrate Halloween differently than we do as a family.
• 2:05
  SPEAKER_00: I have wonderful friends who participate in Halloween.
• 2:09
  SPEAKER_00: They dress up with their kids, they plan amazing family costumes and they go trick-or-treating in their neighborhood.
• 2:14
  SPEAKER_00: And I absolutely love those friends.
• 2:16
  SPEAKER_00: This is simply me sharing why Micah and I have made the decision we have made for our family.
• 2:22
  SPEAKER_00: And hopefully, whether you agree with us or not, it will encourage you to think intentionally about the choices that you are making in your own home because that's really what it comes down to for me.
• 2:34
  SPEAKER_00: So here we go.
• 2:35
  SPEAKER_00: Here are five reasons why our family does Halloween a little bit differently.
• 2:41
  SPEAKER_00: Number one, we want to ask God first.
• 2:44
  SPEAKER_00: I really talked about this on the back corner.
• 2:46
  SPEAKER_00: This is definitely the biggest one for me.
• 2:48
  SPEAKER_00: It's something that Micah and I have had to learn to do over the years.
• 2:52
  SPEAKER_00: When we're making a decision for our family, we want to start by asking the Lord for wisdom.
• 2:56
  SPEAKER_00: Not just that we're not just doing something because everyone else is doing it, not automatically saying yes because it's what we grew up doing, and not even automatically saying no because someone else told us that we shouldn't.
• 3:10
  SPEAKER_00: We want to actually take time to pray about it.
• 3:13
  SPEAKER_00: And I think sometimes as Christian parents, we can spend so much time asking everybody else what we should do.
• 3:19
  SPEAKER_00: Like, what do our pastors think?
• 3:21
  SPEAKER_00: What do our friends do?
• 3:23
  SPEAKER_00: What does that person on Instagram say?
• 3:25
  SPEAKER_00: And those conversations can be very, very helpful.
• 3:29
  SPEAKER_00: I love learning from other people.
• 3:31
  SPEAKER_00: But ultimately, Mike and I are responsible for the decisions we make for our family.
• 3:35
  SPEAKER_00: And we want those decisions to come from a place of prayer and conviction.
• 3:40
  SPEAKER_00: One of the scriptures that comes to mind is James 1.5, which encourages us to ask God for wisdom.
• 3:46
  SPEAKER_00: And I think that's such a good place to start.
• 3:48
  SPEAKER_00: You have to ask him, Lord, what would you have us do?
• 3:52
  SPEAKER_00: What is wise for our family?
• 3:54
  SPEAKER_00: And how can we honor you in the decision we are making?
• 3:58
  SPEAKER_00: And here's something I really want to encourage you to do.
• 4:01
  SPEAKER_00: If you have never even taken the time to look into the history of Halloween or what the Bible says about darkness, spiritual warfare, or the occult, I would definitely encourage you to do that.
• 4:12
  SPEAKER_00: Not because I want you to come to the same conclusions as Micah and I have, but because I think it's really important that we as Christian and as Christian parents understand what God's word says about the things we allow into our homes and the things we participate in.
• 4:27
  SPEAKER_00: And sometimes we just do things because that's what everyone else does.
• 4:31
  SPEAKER_00: It's what we did growing up, it's what our friends are doing, it's what this pastor does, it's what everyone else's school is doing.
• 4:39
  SPEAKER_00: And we don't necessarily stop to ask the questions.
• 4:42
  SPEAKER_00: But I want to encourage you to open your Bible for yourself.
• 4:45
  SPEAKER_00: Look up those scriptures, read them in the context they're in, learn a little bit about the history of Halloween and how the traditions have changed over the years, and then pray about it.
• 4:54
  SPEAKER_00: Ask the Lord for wisdom.
• 4:56
  SPEAKER_00: Ask him to help you discern what is right for your family.
• 4:59
  SPEAKER_00: Because I don't want you to make a decision about Halloween based on what Katie Peterson thinks, trust me, or what the pastors think or what your friends are doing.
• 5:07
  SPEAKER_00: I want you to know what you believe in and why.
• 5:10
  SPEAKER_00: And I think that's something we need to teach our kids to do too.
• 5:13
  SPEAKER_00: Not just to follow rules because mom and dad say so, but we learn how to seek the Lord, study his word, ask questions, and make wise decisions as they grow up.
• 5:23
  SPEAKER_00: Because someday they're going to be making these decisions for themselves.
• 5:26
  SPEAKER_00: And I want my kids to have the faith that is their own, one that isn't just based on what their parents believed, but one that is rooted in their own relationship with Jesus.
• 5:35
  SPEAKER_00: And I don't think that means every Christian family is going to make the exact same decision about every single thing.
• 5:41
  SPEAKER_00: There are a lot of areas in our life where families make different choices.
• 5:45
  SPEAKER_00: But I do think it is important that we actually are being intentional.
• 5:49
  SPEAKER_00: And this is something we've tried to explain to our kids as they've grown up.
• 5:53
  SPEAKER_00: It's not just because I say so.
• 5:55
  SPEAKER_00: We try to explain that we've prayed about these things, and that is the decision that mom and dad have made for their family.
• 6:01
  SPEAKER_00: And as they get older, they are going to have opportunities to make their own decisions too.
• 6:06
  SPEAKER_00: They'll have their own family someday, Lord willing, and they'll need to seek the Lord and make those decisions for themselves.
• 6:12
  SPEAKER_00: But while we're responsible for raising them, this is what we have chosen.
• 6:17
  SPEAKER_00: And I think that is okay.
• 6:19
  SPEAKER_00: Also, we have been very intentional in making sure our kids know that this is a conviction for our family and that we need to be obedient for the Lord and we don't put those convictions on other people.
• 6:30
  SPEAKER_00: So when they see other kids in school participating or doing things that we don't do, um, that's not necessarily a bad thing.
• 6:38
  SPEAKER_00: It's that their family has a different standard and a different conviction than we are.
• 6:42
  SPEAKER_00: Number two, we are intentional about what we expose our kids to.
• 6:47
  SPEAKER_00: Now, this is probably one of the biggest practical reasons we have chosen not to participate in Halloween, uh, in a traditional Halloween activities that happen on the 31st of October.
• 7:00
  SPEAKER_00: It is scary stuff.
• 7:02
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm not talking about the cute pumpkins or kids dress up as firefighters or the amazing family outfits that people come up with.
• 7:08
  SPEAKER_00: I love a good costume.
• 7:10
  SPEAKER_00: I love dressing up, and I love a good theme.
• 7:12
  SPEAKER_00: Like sometimes my friends, I just cannot wait for what their family costumes are every year.
• 7:17
  SPEAKER_00: I think they're hilarious.
• 7:19
  SPEAKER_00: But can we just be real?
• 7:21
  SPEAKER_00: The real dark, frightening, gory side of Halloween.
• 7:24
  SPEAKER_00: It is out there.
• 7:26
  SPEAKER_00: You can see it when you're driving past people's houses in the broad daylight.
• 7:30
  SPEAKER_00: That is where I personally struggle.
• 7:32
  SPEAKER_00: And part of that comes from something that happened, an experience we had when one of our kids were little.
• 7:37
  SPEAKER_00: We lived in Moncton, we lived in a neighborhood, and one Halloween, a boy came to our door wearing a costume that was really scary.
• 7:44
  SPEAKER_00: That frightened one of our kids so bad.
• 7:47
  SPEAKER_00: They were screaming and crying.
• 7:48
  SPEAKER_00: And I remember thinking afterwards that we work really hard as parents to be intentional about what our children watch and what kind of images they're exposed to.
• 7:57
  SPEAKER_00: And then on this one particular night, we were going to open our door to things we had no control over.
• 8:02
  SPEAKER_00: And for us, it just didn't really make sense.
• 8:05
  SPEAKER_00: Some kids can see some really scary things and forget about it five minutes later.
• 8:09
  SPEAKER_00: Other kids think about it for days.
• 8:11
  SPEAKER_00: They have nightmares.
• 8:12
  SPEAKER_00: They start worrying about things that weren't even on their radar before.
• 8:15
  SPEAKER_00: And I know my kids, I know their personalities, I know what they're sensitive to.
• 8:20
  SPEAKER_00: And as their mom, I want to be really thoughtful about what I expose them to.
• 8:24
  SPEAKER_00: And as Christians, we also believe there's a real spiritual reality beyond what we can see.
• 8:29
  SPEAKER_00: And because of that, Mike and I take the darker themes of Halloween very seriously.
• 8:35
  SPEAKER_00: That doesn't mean we live in fear.
• 8:37
  SPEAKER_00: Actually, it's quite the opposite.
• 8:38
  SPEAKER_00: Our faith reminds us that we don't need to be afraid.
• 8:41
  SPEAKER_00: But it does mean we want to be discerning about what we invite into our homes and what we encourage our kids to participate in.
• 8:49
  SPEAKER_00: Philippians 4.8 is a scripture I come back to when thinking about what we fill our minds with.
• 8:54
  SPEAKER_00: And again, I'm not saying every costume or Halloween activity is harmful.
• 8:58
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just explaining why our family, we have chosen to be careful about this.
• 9:02
  SPEAKER_00: Number three, we don't feel like we have to participate in everything.
• 9:06
  SPEAKER_00: Something else we've learned as a family is that it's okay to do things differently.
• 9:10
  SPEAKER_00: We're actually called to be different.
• 9:12
  SPEAKER_00: And I think that's an important lesson for our kids too.
• 9:15
  SPEAKER_00: We live in a culture where there are always activities, holidays, events, and traditions happening.
• 9:20
  SPEAKER_00: And sometimes it can feel like everyone else is doing something we should be doing too.
• 9:24
  SPEAKER_00: But we don't actually have to participate in everything.
• 9:26
  SPEAKER_00: We can appreciate that other families have different traditions while still making different choices for our own home.
• 9:32
  SPEAKER_00: And I think there's real freedom in that.
• 9:34
  SPEAKER_00: One question I sometimes hear is but isn't Halloween a great opportunity to be a light in your neighborhood?
• 9:40
  SPEAKER_00: And I understand that perspective.
• 9:42
  SPEAKER_00: I really do.
• 9:42
  SPEAKER_00: I think there are families who are intentional about using Halloween to connect with their neighbors, show kindness, and build relationships.
• 9:49
  SPEAKER_00: And I think that's wonderful.
• 9:51
  SPEAKER_00: But for us, we never felt like we needed to participate in Halloween to do that.
• 9:55
  SPEAKER_00: Mike and I are both pretty outgoing people and we love getting to know our neighbors.
• 10:00
  SPEAKER_00: When we lived in neighborhoods, we made every effort to talk to people, spend time outside, say hello, and build relationships throughout the year.
• 10:07
  SPEAKER_00: And I think that's something we can all be encouraged to do, not just on Halloween, but all year long.
• 10:12
  SPEAKER_00: Be friendly, get to know the people living around you, invite somebody over, look for opportunities to serve.
• 10:18
  SPEAKER_00: And if your family does choose to hand out candy, I think you can make it really meaningful opportunity as well.
• 10:24
  SPEAKER_00: Be welcoming, generous, and have fun with it.
• 10:26
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe you include a little encouraging note or scripture with treats if that fits your approach.
• 10:32
  SPEAKER_00: There are lots of ways to show kindness.
• 10:35
  SPEAKER_00: I just don't think there's only one night or one particular activity where we get to do that.
• 10:40
  SPEAKER_00: And for us, we've chosen to build those connections in other ways.
• 10:44
  SPEAKER_00: Number four, we want to be thoughtful about excess.
• 10:47
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, now I'm putting on my former dietitian hat for a minute because can we just talk about the candy?
• 10:53
  SPEAKER_00: Oh my goodness, I remember trick-or-treating as a kid.
• 10:55
  SPEAKER_00: I was literally a California raisin one year.
• 10:58
  SPEAKER_00: Anyone remember the California raisins?
• 11:00
  SPEAKER_00: Please tell me I am not the only one.
• 11:02
  SPEAKER_00: But I had a big raisin costume that I slipped on and I went off.
• 11:06
  SPEAKER_00: And I remember having maybe a little bucket.
• 11:08
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe I had a smaller pillowcase.
• 11:09
  SPEAKER_00: I'm not sure.
• 11:10
  SPEAKER_00: And I remember having a little bucket for candy, or maybe I had a small pillowcase.
• 11:14
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know.
• 11:14
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe you guys remember taking pillowcases around your neighborhood back in the day.
• 11:18
  SPEAKER_00: But I feel like things have gotten bigger and bigger over the years.
• 11:21
  SPEAKER_00: And I think sometimes we can get caught up in the idea of more, more, more, more candy, more houses, more events, more treats.
• 11:28
  SPEAKER_00: And I just find myself asking, how much do we really need?
• 11:32
  SPEAKER_00: Now please don't misunderstand me.
• 11:33
  SPEAKER_00: My kids eat candy.
• 11:34
  SPEAKER_00: Y'all know that.
• 11:35
  SPEAKER_00: We buy treats, we love chocolate.
• 11:37
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm absolutely not the mom who never lets the kids have sugar.
• 11:40
  SPEAKER_00: We buy a lot of Halloween candy.
• 11:43
  SPEAKER_00: But I do think it's good to teach our kids that we don't need to collect as much as possible just because we can.
• 11:49
  SPEAKER_00: And this just isn't a Halloween conversation.
• 11:51
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, this can go into Christmas, birthdays, and all your celebrations.
• 11:55
  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes less is enough.
• 11:57
  SPEAKER_00: And number five, we choose to make our own fun traditions.
• 12:00
  SPEAKER_00: Now, this is probably uh my favorite part because we don't just um not go trick-or-treating, close our house down, and have absolutely no fun and make our kids miss out.
• 12:09
  SPEAKER_00: Um we've just changed things around a lot.
• 12:11
  SPEAKER_00: So when our kids were little and we lived in Moncton, we would often plan something special for that evening.
• 12:16
  SPEAKER_00: We would go out for pizza, we would go bowling, we went to Crystal Palace, like remember Crystal Palace.
• 12:22
  SPEAKER_00: Um, or we'd spend the evening with other families.
• 12:25
  SPEAKER_00: And now that we live in the country and we have the opportunity to open our house up to other families, we 1000% throw a party.
• 12:31
  SPEAKER_00: And I love that.
• 12:32
  SPEAKER_00: We order pizza, we buy treats, we hang out together, and the kids have a really fun evening with their friends.
• 12:39
  SPEAKER_00: We even make sure that they have their own candy bags because I don't want them to show up at school the next day and everyone have has treats and they don't.
• 12:47
  SPEAKER_00: I don't want my kids to feel like they're missing out on every single fun thing.
• 12:51
  SPEAKER_00: The candy is not bad part of Halloween.
• 12:54
  SPEAKER_00: The excess, yes, but uh, the candy itself.
• 12:57
  SPEAKER_00: So we make our own fun and we still enjoy all kinds of fall activities.
• 13:01
  SPEAKER_00: We carve pumpkins, we roast pumpkin seeds, we go apple picking, we enjoy all the beautiful colors, we do all the fun things together.
• 13:08
  SPEAKER_00: We just choose not to do the traditional trick-or-treating part of Halloween.
• 13:12
  SPEAKER_00: And I think sometimes as parents, when we decide not to participate in something, we can get so focused on what we're saying no to that we forget to create something wonderful and say yes to.
• 13:23
  SPEAKER_00: And I want my kids to look back on their childhood and remember the fun things we did together.
• 13:28
  SPEAKER_00: No, not just the things we didn't do.
• 13:31
  SPEAKER_00: I want them to remember the pizza nights, the friends coming over, the last we have together, the special treats, and being part of a family that has their own tradition.
• 13:39
  SPEAKER_00: So those are the five reasons our family does Halloween differently.
• 13:43
  SPEAKER_00: And I want to finish by saying something that I really hope came through on this conversation.
• 13:47
  SPEAKER_00: I don't think our family is better than any other family because of the decision we've made about Halloween, not at all.
• 13:53
  SPEAKER_00: I have friends who celebrate differently than we do.
• 13:55
  SPEAKER_00: I have friends who love dressing up, I have friends who take their kids trick-or-treating, and I have friends who make the same choices as we do.
• 14:02
  SPEAKER_00: And I love them all.
• 14:03
  SPEAKER_00: I don't want Halloween to become something that divides us or makes us question each other's love for the Lord.
• 14:08
  SPEAKER_00: I think we can have thoughtful conversations about these things.
• 14:11
  SPEAKER_00: We can share why we've made certain decisions, we can listen to each other, and we can give one another grace.
• 14:17
  SPEAKER_00: For Micah and me, this has been about being intentional with our kids and the things we choose to participate in or not.
• 14:24
  SPEAKER_00: And I hope that as our kids grow up, they learn to do the same, not simply complete, not simply copying what we did, but learning to pray, seek wisdom, and make thoughtful decisions of their own.
• 14:35
  SPEAKER_00: And if you've never really thought about Halloween in that way before, maybe this episode will encourage you to have that conversation with your spouse.
• 14:43
  SPEAKER_00: Spend some time praying about it.
• 14:45
  SPEAKER_00: Not because you need to make the same decision we have, but because I think it's always good to be intentional about the things we bring into our family life.
• 14:52
  SPEAKER_00: So whether, so whether you celebrate Halloween or you don't, my encouragement is the same.
• 14:58
  SPEAKER_00: Don't just go with the flow.
• 15:00
  SPEAKER_00: Be intentional, get into God's word and seek his wisdom for your family.
• 15:04
  SPEAKER_00: And that really is the heart behind why I'm sharing the episode today.
• 15:09
  SPEAKER_00: As you know, we have been finishing praise, prayer, and protein with our things of the week.
• 15:14
  SPEAKER_00: So my praise for this week is the freedom uh we have as parents to build traditions that are meaningful to our own families.
• 15:21
  SPEAKER_00: I love that we can create special memories with our kids, even when those traditions look different from the way culture is doing it or the way our society is doing it.
• 15:29
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm also thankful for the friendships and community that we have with other families who enjoy spending time together.
• 15:35
  SPEAKER_00: My prayer for this week is for wisdom for Micah and me to continue, um, for Micah and me as we continue raising our kids.
• 15:43
  SPEAKER_00: And for all of you listening who are making um decisions for your own families, that we would seek the Lord and we would be willing to listen and we would be willing to have the courage to follow through on the convictions that we believe that He has placed on our hearts.
• 15:57
  SPEAKER_00: And that we also would be gracious and kind towards people who make different choices.
• 16:02
  SPEAKER_00: My protein this week, well, I feel like after talking about all the Halloween candy for the last little while, I should probably give you something with a little more protein.
• 16:10
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, so my encouragement this week is to keep easy protein-packed meals ready for those busy evenings, uh, especially on all these fall nights when everyone is so busy.
• 16:21
  SPEAKER_00: Although I have seen a lot of reels saying how much protein are in a lot um if you eat a massive amount of Reese's peanut butter cups, but maybe don't try to get away with that.
• 16:32
  SPEAKER_00: So, in closing, I want to thank you so much for joining me for this conversation that's been a little bit different from what we usually talk about.
• 16:39
  SPEAKER_00: I hope you heard my heart in it all.
• 16:41
  SPEAKER_00: This isn't about rules or trying to convince everyone to do things our way.
• 16:45
  SPEAKER_00: It's simply about sharing how we've navigated some things as a family and hopefully encouraging you to be thoughtful about the decisions you're making in your own home.
• 16:53
  SPEAKER_00: And if you've been one of those people who have asked me about Halloween over the years or even in this last month, I hope this answers some of your questions.
• 17:01
  SPEAKER_00: I'll include some scriptures in the show notes if you'd like to spend some time studying this topic for yourself.
• 17:06
  SPEAKER_00: Thanks so much for listening to Praise, Prayer, and Protein, and I'll talk to you next week.
• 17:11
  SPEAKER_00: Bye, friends! Protein that carry me through.