Latest / Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families / Why Restricting Sugar Can Backfire (a Q&A About Sugar & ADHD)

Transcript

Why Restricting Sugar Can Backfire (a Q&A About Sugar & ADHD) · Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families

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  Speaker 1: Every Tuesday on the Happy Families Podcast, we answer your
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  Speaker 1: tricky question. She can send tricky questions to us by
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  Speaker 1: a Happy families dot com dot you. There's a simple,
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  Speaker 1: is to say, by the sounds of things, a super
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  Speaker 1: simple system at happy families dot com dot you where
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  Speaker 1: you can scroll down, click the record button and start talking.
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  Speaker 1: Tell us what's on your mind. We love answering questions
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  Speaker 1: about pretty much anything at all, and today we've got
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  Speaker 1: another one of your tricky questions. Well answer that next. Hello,
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  Speaker 1: Welcome to the Happy Families podcast, where you get real
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  Speaker 1: parenting solutions every single day. This is Australia's most downloaded
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  Speaker 1: parenting podcast where Justin and Kylie Coulson the parents of
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  Speaker 1: six kids, grandparents to one grand baby. We've been through week.
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  Speaker 1: We're currently going through the teen years with our fifth child.
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  Speaker 1: She's sixteen, got a twelve year old, we've got a twelvey.
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  Speaker 1: We have years of experience and our granddaughter is reminding
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  Speaker 1: us what it's like to have a titlerr again because
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  Speaker 1: she's two and a half. Kylie, somebody has sent us
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  Speaker 1: a voice note with a question. Here it comes let's
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  Speaker 1: check this out.
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  Speaker 2: Hi, my name is Sam. I'm just inquiring as to
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  Speaker 2: how you ensure with an ADHD child when reducing sugar
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  Speaker 2: intake that you're also not setting the child up for
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  Speaker 2: I suppose unhealthy anxiety regarding weight, especially in a girl.
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  Speaker 2: I listened to your podcast this morning regarding ensuring children
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  Speaker 2: have positive outlooks regarding their weight. But I also am
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  Speaker 2: mindful when reducing her sugar intake, as it helps her
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  Speaker 2: behavior to not create anxiety or more surrounding that.
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  Speaker 1: Okay, so I'm going to jump in first, Kylie. I
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  Speaker 1: know you've got a whole bunch of stuff that you
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  Speaker 1: scribbled down as we were listening there. I just want
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  Speaker 1: to highlight the desire to be hot. And I'm using
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  Speaker 1: the word intentionally because when I did my book Misconnection,
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  Speaker 1: while your teenage daughter hates you expect the world to talk,
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  Speaker 1: that was precisely the language that everybody was using when
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  Speaker 1: they were talking to me about body image issues. It's
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  Speaker 1: primarily a female thing. Over the last few years, there's
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  Speaker 1: been a slight shift. Boys are now more worried about
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  Speaker 1: it than girls in terms of this looks maxing movement.
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  Speaker 1: But basically this is an ongoing challenge neudiversity or not.
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  Speaker 1: The World Health Organization conducted a survey of more than
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  Speaker 1: two hundred thousand people nearly a quarter million people in
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  Speaker 1: forty two countries, and in every single country surveyed, girls
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  Speaker 1: at age fifteen were more likely than boys to report
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  Speaker 1: that they were fat. Get this, Even though the girls
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  Speaker 1: were saying that they were the ones that were carrying
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  Speaker 1: too much weight, the boys were actually more likely to
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  Speaker 1: be overweight. In other words, gender gender predicts who's going
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  Speaker 1: to feel fat much better than it predicts who's going
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  Speaker 1: to be carrying that additional weight. So Sam's question is
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  Speaker 1: really a question I think about body image. It's a
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  Speaker 1: question about physical health, and it's a question that Vexa's
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  Speaker 1: parents of daughters in ways that we just we don't
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  Speaker 1: encounter it to the same level and in the same
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  Speaker 1: way with boys.
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  Speaker 3: Sam's asking a few questions here. She wants to be
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  Speaker 3: able to utilize the limitation of sugar intake to help
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  Speaker 3: modify behavior, but she's also concerned that in doing so
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  Speaker 3: she creates a body image issue. For me, there's actually
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  Speaker 3: a really simple response to that. When we have these
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  Speaker 3: conversations with our children, this is not about behavior modification.
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  Speaker 3: This is not about a weight issue. This is about
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  Speaker 3: a well being issue.
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  Speaker 1: Yeah, I was thinking that as well. I wrote down
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  Speaker 1: three things, four things, four things like this might be
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  Speaker 1: the shortest podcast that I've ever done, because this is
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  Speaker 1: kind of all I've got. Focus on physical activity, not wait,
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  Speaker 1: focus on nutritious food, not weight, focus on minimizing screens
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  Speaker 1: not wait, focus on getting enough sleep, making sure that
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  Speaker 1: sleeps healthy.
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  Speaker 3: And it's a holistic change. It's not about one.
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  Speaker 1: Child, it's the whole family.
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  Speaker 3: Like in our home, we have recognized that we actually
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  Speaker 3: feel better as individuals when we limit our sugar intake.
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  Speaker 3: It's not about For some of us it is a
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  Speaker 3: weight loss journey, but that's not what the focus is.
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  Speaker 3: The focus is how do I want to feel? I
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  Speaker 3: want to feel vibrant, I want to feel vital, I
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  Speaker 3: want to feel strong. And if I want those things,
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  Speaker 3: then it's being aware of how different foods or different
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  Speaker 3: activities impact those feelings.
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  Speaker 1: Yeah, how do we feel? It's as simple as saying,
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  Speaker 1: let's actually stay off process stuff this week and just
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  Speaker 1: do an experiment, and then at the end of the
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  Speaker 1: week we're going to go and have a little bit
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  Speaker 1: of a party and We'll buy a whole lot of
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  Speaker 1: process food and need a whole lot of junkie stuff.
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  Speaker 1: We'll have some donuts and lives of hot chips and
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  Speaker 1: whatever else. And at the end of it, you say,
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  Speaker 1: had that feel like as it was going in, had
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  Speaker 1: it feel amazing? How it feel five minutes later, an
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  Speaker 1: hour later that night. And as the kids start to
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  Speaker 1: have that recognition, then you start to have conversations about
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  Speaker 1: how you want to to construct your family's health, habits, lifestyle,
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  Speaker 1: diet free decisions.
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  Speaker 3: So I don't know if we're oversimplifying this for you, Sam,
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  Speaker 3: but to me, that just seems like the logical response
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  Speaker 3: moving forward. It's not about weight, it's not actually even
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  Speaker 3: about behavior. It's about well being and how I want
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  Speaker 3: to feel. And when we're dealing with children, they just
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  Speaker 3: listen to their brain, no matter what it says, and
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  Speaker 3: their brain tells them that they want the stuff in
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  Speaker 3: the bright colored, glossy papers in the packets, and we
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  Speaker 3: just need to help them recognize the difference between what
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  Speaker 3: it feels like to eat well and what it feels
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  Speaker 3: like to not eat well and help them through that process,
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  Speaker 3: because regardless of whether they have that Aha moment, depending
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  Speaker 3: on what age they are, they're still going to want
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  Speaker 3: to go back, but the idea is that we kind
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  Speaker 3: of continue to bring them back to the idea that
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  Speaker 3: as a family, we're working towards this, this is how
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  Speaker 3: we want to.
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  Speaker 1: Feel after the break. To build on that. It's really
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  Speaker 1: important that we touch a little bit deeper on what
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  Speaker 1: you're discussing. And one more key thing that every family
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  Speaker 1: needs to know when it comes to making these kinds
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  Speaker 1: of lifestyle and health choices. If that's the part you
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  Speaker 1: decide to go down and stay with us, this is
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  Speaker 1: the Happy Famili's podcast, Kylie. I want to really lift
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  Speaker 1: off what you've just highlighted. We've discovered in our family,
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  Speaker 1: in our own lives. Forget the kids, just you and
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  Speaker 1: I with our own decisions. These things are not one
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  Speaker 1: and done like you do. Not say we're going to
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  Speaker 1: be healthy and make the commitment and then everything's perfect
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  Speaker 1: from that point forward. You will revisit this again and
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  Speaker 1: again and again and again before you really start to
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  Speaker 1: get traction like this is a it's an uphill climb.
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  Speaker 1: The second thing that I wanted to add is that
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  Speaker 1: we can become really fanatical as parents about it. We
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  Speaker 1: can get it in our head that our child can't sugar,
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  Speaker 1: or we're done with process stuff, or we're going to
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  Speaker 1: make sure that there are no more screens, and like,
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  Speaker 1: we get really hardcore about it, and that fanaticism actually
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  Speaker 1: creates a whole lot of resistance. It creates a whole
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  Speaker 1: lot of tension, a whole lot of fights, and sometimes
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  Speaker 1: we set the standard impossibly high for ourselves and for
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  Speaker 1: our children. There's no flexibility. I remember I was in
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  Speaker 1: the Channel Line studios one time having a chat with
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  Speaker 1: David Campbell. I think he's vegan, at least vegetarian. I'm
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  Speaker 1: pretty sure hes vegan, though, and I asked him what
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  Speaker 1: his kid's diet is like, and the words he used
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  Speaker 1: literally were I'm not a fanatic about this. So the
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  Speaker 1: kids are allowed to go to parties, eat sugary stuff,
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  Speaker 1: have party pies, whatever they want. This is a decision
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  Speaker 1: that I've made for me, but I'm not making the
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  Speaker 1: decision for the whole family. And I'm just hoping that
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  Speaker 1: my children will see my good example and choose over
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  Speaker 1: time to interrogate, think through, investigate the food and other
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  Speaker 1: health choices that they're making.
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  Speaker 3: We've been working on this with our kids for the
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  Speaker 3: last nearly six months now.
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  Speaker 1: And like hardcore for the last six months. I was
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  Speaker 1: going to say the last sixteen years, yea, but yes,
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  Speaker 1: properly hardcore for the last six months.
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  Speaker 3: And our youngest is by far the one who's most
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  Speaker 3: challenged by this.
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  Speaker 1: Oh yeah, it probably fits that profile that Sam's highlighted
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  Speaker 1: with her daughter as well.
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  Speaker 3: Yeah, and she loves Natella. That's her number one spread
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  Speaker 3: of choice. But I won't have it in the house.
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  Speaker 3: But every now and again she'll ask if she can
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  Speaker 3: make some crapes, and can I get her a jar
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  Speaker 3: of Natella? So I buy the smallest jar I can.
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  Speaker 3: And the other day when she decided that that's what
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  Speaker 3: she wanted to do, she woke up the next morning
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  Speaker 3: and she said, Mom, I don't think I want to
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  Speaker 3: tell her anymore. And I said, what do you mean,
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  Speaker 3: And she said, well, I made myself some crepes and
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  Speaker 3: I had some and she said, I just didn't feel great,
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  Speaker 3: and I was on the toilet for a little bit
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  Speaker 3: last night, and she said, I just think my body's
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  Speaker 3: kind of telling me that this isn't good for me.
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  Speaker 1: I didn't know this story. You haven't shared that with.
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  Speaker 3: Me, so what's the AHA moments, But it's how many.
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  Speaker 1: Years it's been four or five years.
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  Speaker 3: No, no, no, no, I'm going to let you know
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  Speaker 3: that just because we've had an our Har moment does
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  Speaker 3: not mean by any stretch that we have won the battle,
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  Speaker 3: because that jar of Natella disappeared very quickly, and I
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  Speaker 3: mean in spite of these in spite of that insight.
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  Speaker 3: And so that's what I'm kind of suggesting for some
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  Speaker 3: of us. We have to have our Har moments, often
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  Speaker 3: right in the same area before it finally sinks. But
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  Speaker 3: that was a really important AHA moment that she's had,
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  Speaker 3: and as a result, what it's teaching me is that
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  Speaker 3: even though she's still craving the thing that is not
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  Speaker 3: making her feel good, she's actually starting to eat with
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  Speaker 3: more consciousness. She's actually starting to become aware of how
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  Speaker 3: she feels in her body when she's eating certain foods.
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  Speaker 1: Okay, I mean that's not resonating with what I've been
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  Speaker 1: seeing in the last couple of days in the kitchen,
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  Speaker 1: but you're having more of these conversations with her than me,
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  Speaker 1: and that's really refreshing to hear. So Sam, there is hope,
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  Speaker 1: but it is incremental Oh my goodness. It takes a
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  Speaker 1: long time, and just when you think you're making progress,
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  Speaker 1: you discover that the progress is not everything that you
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  Speaker 1: hope that it would be. Consistency, hope, conversations, insights, getting
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  Speaker 1: the kids to actually endorse the decisions rather than you
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  Speaker 1: being the unilateral arbiter who just says, here's how it's
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  Speaker 1: going to be. Those the ideas that we've highlighted, plus
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  Speaker 1: those three pillars of health, getting enough sleep, getting enough nutrition,
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  Speaker 1: and getting enough movement, and minimizing those screens. Good luck.
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  Speaker 1: Thanks for the question. If you've got a tricky question,
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