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Tuesday TAKE CARE OF NEW MUMS - 4th trimester with doula Lauren🤰👶 🪴 · She Rises with Ashy & Tijana

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Speaker 1: Apologie Production, Grow and Glows Twelve Days of Christmas. Hello everybody,
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Speaker 1: and welcome back to Twelve Days of Christmas. And I'm
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Speaker 1: really really excited to have today's guests on. She played
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Speaker 1: a really, really beautiful part in my postpartum journey and
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Speaker 1: I honestly wish I could clone her times a million,
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Speaker 1: and for every mama to have someone like her support
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Speaker 1: you girls in your postpartum journey. Welcome Lauren to the podcast.
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Speaker 2: Thank you, my love much for beautiful but you just
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Speaker 2: said that.
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Speaker 1: I honestly don't know how I would have got through
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Speaker 1: that without you like I would have, but it just
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Speaker 1: made it so much more easier and more beautiful. And
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Speaker 1: I understood my body more and I was just taking
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Speaker 1: much more better care of myself and I learned so
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Speaker 1: much about nutrition. And that's why I wanted to get
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Speaker 1: you on today because I really wanted to talk about
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Speaker 1: all things dula. And before we get started, in your
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Speaker 1: own words, could you tell me what is a dulla?
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Speaker 1: Because I really hadn't heard much about it until my
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Speaker 1: girlfriend Megsie was like, you need to hire a douler.
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Speaker 3: I was like, a what, so, yeah, what is a doller?
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Speaker 2: Duelers have supported women since the beginning of time, like
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Speaker 2: we've always supported and held women through write the passage.
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Speaker 2: These women may have been like wide women of the community,
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Speaker 2: or the mothers, or the supers or the aunt even
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Speaker 2: the grandma's And I guess it looked a little different now,
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Speaker 2: but it's essentially the same. And the word doula mean
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Speaker 2: serving women, and I guess by definition, a dueler is
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Speaker 2: a trained companion who offer non medical support for pregnancy,
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Speaker 2: birth and postpartum period. And I'm obviously just speaking mostly postpartum.
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Speaker 2: Fair vital emotional and physical support from others or duellers
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Speaker 2: come with their own wisdom and live body experiences and
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Speaker 2: you know, knowledge of skills in the ways that they
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Speaker 2: want to support a mother, especially in the first six
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Speaker 2: weeks of postpartum. You know, it can vary greatly as
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Speaker 2: well up to the mother as well as the dueler
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Speaker 2: of what she requires. But adula will provide emotional, physical
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Speaker 2: and spiritual support. You know, six weeks is the minimum
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Speaker 2: we should be supporting women as post button dula in
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Speaker 2: home packages. That should be at least maybe three hours
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Speaker 2: a week. Whatever that care looks like is what it
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Speaker 2: looks like. But you know I do all my cooking
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Speaker 2: outside that my visits are purely mother centered. But yeah,
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Speaker 2: DULA is there for the mother, and I think if
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Speaker 2: we support the mother, then she can focus on the baby.
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Speaker 2: And you know, the baby is going to be fine.
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Speaker 2: The baby only needs the mom. So if we can
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Speaker 2: look after the mom, they then can have the space
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Speaker 2: to look after and nurture their children. Yes, we are theirhore,
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Speaker 2: you know, birth trauma, birth debris. We can support the
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Speaker 2: day to day running of a home. We can cook meals,
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Speaker 2: we can massage or do any of those traditional sort
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Speaker 2: of practices. Reptims support women. You know, we're there for
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Speaker 2: emotional support, but also we are there for family support,
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Speaker 2: lactation support. As dulas, we also have such a beautiful
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Speaker 2: connection with other women and other professionals in the area,
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Speaker 2: so we can always support you to find people you need,
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Speaker 2: life to lactations consultants, duellers are there without judgment, and
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Speaker 2: we're not there to save you or fix you, but
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Speaker 2: we're they're just to be with you. And I always
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Speaker 2: say I walk with women. Do we walk, you know
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Speaker 2: in that postcardum period together?
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Speaker 1: I absolutely love that. And I just feel like in
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Speaker 1: today's society and different cultures obviously do things differently, but
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Speaker 1: in our Australian culture, so many women are just doing
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Speaker 1: this alone. They don't have a village, they don't have
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Speaker 1: a tribe, they don't have this beautiful community that is
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Speaker 1: there to help with all of that. And then it's
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Speaker 1: almost celebrated being the boss babe and like handling it
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Speaker 1: all and like, you know, you see women post on
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Speaker 1: social media and there's no judgment, like gotta do what
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Speaker 1: you gotta do, and everyone's different. But like you know,
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Speaker 1: in hospital getting out their laptop and getting straight back
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Speaker 1: into work and not really focusing on their healing fourth
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Speaker 1: trimester period, which is so important emotionally, mentally and physically
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Speaker 1: to actually take the time to allow your body to
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Speaker 1: rest and recover because it's such a huge event to
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Speaker 1: be pregnant, go through labor, and.
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Speaker 3: Then get to know your baby. So could you talk
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Speaker 3: a little.
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Speaker 1: Bit more about the importance of the fourth trimester because
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Speaker 1: it's not spoken about enough.
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Speaker 2: The thing about the fourth trimester, or even the first
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Speaker 2: forty days of postpartum, is that we live in a
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Speaker 2: culture that doesn't honor rights of passage and we don't
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Speaker 2: have the reverence or that mother baby diad. We are
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Speaker 2: fed this that culture, like you said, and we are
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Speaker 2: also really unaware of the potency of that fourth trimester
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Speaker 2: and what it holds. Postpartum will affect us literally for
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Speaker 2: the rest of our life, so on many many different levels,
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Speaker 2: and it will set my mother up to thrive or
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Speaker 2: basically not thrive, you know. In terms of why postpartum
4:53
Speaker 2: is so important, there's so many different revenues. I could
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Speaker 2: go down and so many different tunnels and talk about
4:59
Speaker 2: why it's important. So I will try and be concife
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Speaker 2: about seven one. But if you haven't heard of the
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Speaker 2: first forty day or understand why there is such an
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Speaker 2: emphasis on this time, it is so much about or
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Speaker 2: on the mother's recovery, And as you said, places around
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Speaker 2: the world have the most amazing forty day you know,
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Speaker 2: confinement or support and they hold the mother so well
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Speaker 2: because as a culture, if the mother isn't well after
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Speaker 2: her first forty day, it's actually on the culture, not
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Speaker 2: on the mother. It means that they haven't supported her enough.
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Speaker 2: And when people hear that, they're like, oh, it's so
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Speaker 2: elabyrinth for it too much, or you know, why would
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Speaker 2: you bother like or whatever it might be. Just get
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Speaker 2: back into it. It's really sad that that's how we think,
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Speaker 2: and that here on the West we emphisize the baby
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Speaker 2: and it's all about the baby. And it is a
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Speaker 2: time where the mother should be resting as much as
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Speaker 2: she can horizontally as possible, establishing a feeding relationship, and
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Speaker 2: learning about her baby. It's such a powerful time where
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Speaker 2: all these things could be done with the distractions of
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Speaker 2: people and outside, you know, in the world. But if
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Speaker 2: a mother had given the space, she can really tune
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Speaker 2: into her intuition and she can obviously then learn about
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Speaker 2: her baby and that connection with her bubba. And then
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Speaker 2: I find that mothers and mother from their venture and
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Speaker 2: from their intuition, which is something that I really feel
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Speaker 2: like a complete change in you. Like you're obviously such
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Speaker 2: a beautiful mother and such a wonderful mom, but the
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Speaker 2: light and that change in your intuition, as soon as
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Speaker 2: you know that first six week was up, I was like,
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Speaker 2: you are a completely different woman, Mike, And that was
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Speaker 2: so cool and really like such an honor to watch
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Speaker 2: a weakness.
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Speaker 1: It was so so beautiful to go through that transition
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Speaker 1: and to do things so differently to my first I
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Speaker 1: just felt so much more confident to trust my intuition
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Speaker 1: and to trust my body, and also just knowing that
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Speaker 1: I'm worthy, deserving and like that's okay to rest, that
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Speaker 1: I don't have to do all the things, and my
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Speaker 1: body and my health is so important, and it's like
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Speaker 1: that overflow, you know, filling up your own cup first.
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Speaker 1: We don't have to be running on empty in that
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Speaker 1: first forty days. That is going to overflow for the
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Speaker 1: rest of your time being a mum.
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Speaker 2: Well, yeah, sets you up as a mother, and you know,
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Speaker 2: mothers should be relieved of houseful duties and tending to
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Speaker 2: children and cooking and cleaning, because the first forty days
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Speaker 2: should be about the mother allowing herself to rest and
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Speaker 2: to restore and to heal and nourish. A mother's postpartum
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Speaker 2: and how well she recovers is critical because it can
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Speaker 2: affect you for ten years after childbirth and even into menopause.
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Speaker 2: You may not see the effects of not rething. You know,
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Speaker 2: in the first year of your brother's life, you know,
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Speaker 2: you may get depleted. You may not, but you may
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Speaker 2: enter menopause and once thing happened in menopause, you might
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Speaker 2: actually you know, there's women who have prolapsuge because they
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Speaker 2: didn't rest in their postpartum that they don't until they
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Speaker 2: get to menopause. And they say the first forty days
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Speaker 2: affect the next forty years of your life.
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Speaker 3: Yeah, and I do think too.
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Speaker 1: It made me a better mum because I was well
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Speaker 1: rested and my nervous system was so calm. I could
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Speaker 1: show up for my kids and especially my new baby
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Speaker 1: so much better, you know. And it's not only that,
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Speaker 1: it's also the importance of the nutrition side of things,
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Speaker 1: which I would love to dive deep into with you,
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Speaker 1: because gosh, I learned so much about and like you
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Speaker 1: provided all of my food, Like I literally didn't have
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Speaker 1: to cook or make any kind of drinks or anything.
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Speaker 1: It was all there, you dropped it off like and
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Speaker 1: that was one of my favorite parts, because one, I
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Speaker 1: just I didn't want to have to cook, but two,
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Speaker 1: I just knew that everything I was putting in my
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Speaker 1: body was made for a postpartum mum's body to be
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Speaker 1: nourished and to give me the fuel and the energy
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Speaker 1: and all the nutrients and minerals that I needed to
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Speaker 1: actually recover the best that I could. So let's talk
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Speaker 1: about the food, because I think I think a lot
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Speaker 1: of mums think, oh, I could just eat healthy, but
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Speaker 1: it's actually some dos and don'ts, different things that you
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Speaker 1: should and shouldn't have.
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Speaker 3: In that force.
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Speaker 2: The size of the belly changes, you know, the size
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Speaker 2: of our uterus, our pelvis change is shape. Obviously, our
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Speaker 2: baby is born and then we do everything in reverse.
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Speaker 2: And I gas, I said, we take a slow, long
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Speaker 2: nine months to do this, but in postpartum, this quick
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Speaker 2: six weeks. I feel like it's like this vacuum that
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Speaker 2: sucks you back. The drop of hormone after pregnancy is
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Speaker 2: the largest hormonal change anyone will ever experience in their lifetime,
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Speaker 2: and it is also the single largest sudden hormonal drop
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Speaker 2: as well. You're going through the changes in your body.
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Speaker 2: Your newborn is completely dependent on you. But also like
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Speaker 2: in an Aavetic sense in relation to food, is our
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Speaker 2: mother loses what they call fire, and i'm that through
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Speaker 2: the blood, and then water through the sweat and amniotic fluid,
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Speaker 2: and then earth through the placenta and the baby. And
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Speaker 2: this lead like a whole lot of air and space.
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Speaker 2: And this is what we call vata in Avetta, and
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Speaker 2: what it is, it's this dry, light and cold in
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Speaker 2: nature kind of create cart digestion and guiding depression, lung immunity.
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Speaker 2: Why this is super important is we need to balance
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Speaker 2: this energy with warming, grounding, maurishing foods in the first
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Speaker 2: forty days because there's so much healing and so much
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Speaker 2: like restoration to do. A woman learned how her culture
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Speaker 2: values her role in the writer package, so we bleed,
10:31
Speaker 2: we go through birth and post pardon, menopausal, the death,
10:35
Speaker 2: so our mother learns how her culture value and fee
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Speaker 2: that mother in that writer package. So if we're not
10:44
Speaker 2: supporting women, if we're not being in awe of a
10:47
Speaker 2: mother and what she's done, you know, that's fly. Women
10:51
Speaker 2: don't trust their intuition, you know, don't think their role
10:54
Speaker 2: is important, or you know, they're not seeing or heard
10:57
Speaker 2: because we are unraveled and we are craft open, and
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Speaker 2: then we rebuild when we come back, and every time rebirth,
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Speaker 2: we rebirthself again and again. And this transition is like
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Speaker 2: a really beautiful coming home to ourself that we never
11:12
Speaker 2: really for I guess coming I didn't, that's for sure.
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Speaker 2: But yeah, in terms of the food and the nourishment,
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Speaker 2: according to ada Veda, a new or mother has this
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Speaker 2: excess of air and it's due to fluid, the blood
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Speaker 2: and the potentia leaving our body, so we're left with
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Speaker 2: this element of cold and dry in nature. So it's
11:32
Speaker 2: really important, and it's really biful, not just for the
11:35
Speaker 2: mother but for her milk as well. The amount of
11:37
Speaker 2: women that have seen they may have, you know what
11:40
Speaker 2: they want to classes, milk productions not falling as nicely
11:43
Speaker 2: as they would like. And then you look at the
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Speaker 2: food they're eating, and as soon as you change the
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Speaker 2: food they're eating, it's falling beautifully. We just need to
11:50
Speaker 2: avoid And this is what I did particular in my
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Speaker 2: first pregnancy, and I ended up getting post haartum depletion
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Speaker 2: quite severely, and post hartum viroditis from probably the nutrition
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Speaker 2: that I ate. I ate beautifully, but I ate all
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Speaker 2: cold and raw foods. I ate salads and a sigh bottle,
12:08
Speaker 2: all the things that we love so much and we
12:10
Speaker 2: think is healthy, but for post part Yeah, and I
12:15
Speaker 2: was like, this is amazing. My partner's making you all
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Speaker 2: these beautiful juices, these things.
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Speaker 3: Oh my god.
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Speaker 2: Yeah, we need to kindle that digestive fire. And if
12:24
Speaker 2: you think of the fire you've ever made out in
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Speaker 2: the open, if you just start throwing like logs and
12:29
Speaker 2: things onto it. It's not going to burn and it's
12:31
Speaker 2: not going to create that beautiful warmth and then come
12:33
Speaker 2: into the higher. So you know, we want to prepare
12:37
Speaker 2: really grounding, nourishing and restorative foods, so soup and broths
12:42
Speaker 2: and shoes and curries, especially in the first few weeks.
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Speaker 2: We don't want too much like meat or anything really
12:49
Speaker 2: hard to digest, maybe very mushy and easy to digest.
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Speaker 1: The chicken conchie hue. Oh, I still like think about
12:58
Speaker 1: that chicken conchi.
12:59
Speaker 2: Oh, you're another one.
12:59
Speaker 1: It's so friggin yummy. It's probably one of my favorite
13:02
Speaker 1: meals you ever made.
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Speaker 2: And do you know what, even my girls of it.
13:05
Speaker 2: And it's so funny every time, I like, what would
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Speaker 2: you feels like for lunch? Konji?
13:08
Speaker 1: Oh?
13:09
Speaker 2: Everybody loves kanji.
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Speaker 3: It's so norm and.
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Speaker 1: It feels so nourishing and like warm, and just like
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Speaker 1: feels like that home cooked wholesomeness just is so yummy.
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Speaker 2: The home cooked is really important as well, because you know,
13:20
Speaker 2: when we look at the food, if we are receiving
13:23
Speaker 2: foods from our community, maybe through our meal train, when
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Speaker 2: people are making food with loves and they really put
13:30
Speaker 2: that intention into it, and they know that they're going
13:32
Speaker 2: to serve a newborn mother. I think even just the
13:36
Speaker 2: intention of somebody bringing your home cooked milk, not they
13:39
Speaker 2: drop it at the door. They don't even want to
13:40
Speaker 2: feed the baby, they just want to nourish you. I
13:43
Speaker 2: think that is also so important for the newborn mother,
13:47
Speaker 2: knowing that people are around her, surrounding her and cooking
13:50
Speaker 2: her food. But as I said, like yeah, all of
13:52
Speaker 2: that auto not only is warming and healing for the mum,
13:55
Speaker 2: but it's also means that she doesn't have to get
13:57
Speaker 2: up right if she being cooked for, she doesn't have
14:00
Speaker 2: to be in the kitchen and neither did depart, which
14:01
Speaker 2: would be also beautiful. But it's also very supportive of
14:05
Speaker 2: that beautiful breath milk and the production breast milk. Another
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Speaker 2: really important thing about food that I found, especially in
14:12
Speaker 2: my first pregnancy. If you're taking supplement for your health
14:16
Speaker 2: and to support yourself, a lot of women stop them
14:19
Speaker 2: because you know, they prenate all bit vitamins and whatnot,
14:22
Speaker 2: a lot of women stop them, like you know, a
14:24
Speaker 2: week after birth. So keep up with your vitamins and
14:27
Speaker 2: keep up with you know, whatever you're taking that you
14:30
Speaker 2: had beforehand, because that obviously is really important as well.
14:34
Speaker 2: And then we have healing and warming herbs and spices
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Speaker 2: that we can add your foods, which is really beautiful
14:39
Speaker 2: as well.
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Speaker 3: What about the drinks you used to make me?
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Speaker 2: Yeah, so again there's obviously herb that we can you
14:45
Speaker 2: to heal women and to support women. That there's the drinks,
14:49
Speaker 2: and then you know, just warm chies because they're full
14:52
Speaker 2: of goodness fat, and also all the spices and herb
14:56
Speaker 2: that women need postpartum, allowing women to drink warm drink,
15:01
Speaker 2: even if it is just warm water. So then the
15:04
Speaker 2: cold war, we don't want ice in our water or
15:07
Speaker 2: anything like that, because again I will not support the
15:10
Speaker 2: digestive fire to kindle.
15:13
Speaker 1: Yes, I can't remember how long I had you for
15:16
Speaker 1: it was it eight weeks?
15:18
Speaker 3: Six weeks? Six weeks? Was it?
15:19
Speaker 1: So? Each week when you came around, you had something
15:22
Speaker 1: different that we would do, and I know it was
15:24
Speaker 1: like felt quite intuitively to what I needed. But like
15:27
Speaker 1: one week it was a massage, the next week it
15:28
Speaker 1: was a yoni steam, the third week we like talked
15:31
Speaker 1: about my birth. And then there was another time where
15:33
Speaker 1: you set up this beautiful bath and you gave me
15:35
Speaker 1: all these different things to put in my bath were
15:37
Speaker 1: actually really healing for my vaginal health. Can you talk
15:41
Speaker 1: about the different things that you do with mothers each
15:43
Speaker 1: week when you come to the.
15:45
Speaker 2: Room, And obviously, like everybody's going to be different, everybody
15:49
Speaker 2: has trained differently or has belief in what's important for
15:54
Speaker 2: women post part of dumb women really focus on the
15:58
Speaker 2: family and the home and you know, helping mind out
16:01
Speaker 2: in that sense, especially that you know, maybe second, third,
16:04
Speaker 2: fourth kid kind of thing. I really like to support
16:07
Speaker 2: women as much as I can while there to help
16:10
Speaker 2: them to heal. The practices I do on you I
16:13
Speaker 2: do on myself, and so yeah, there's things like you're
16:16
Speaker 2: only seeming and massage is really important for the mother
16:19
Speaker 2: and she's a new mom because she's on to the stars.
16:22
Speaker 2: To collect her baby and to ground her and to
16:25
Speaker 2: bring her back on this earth is really important, so
16:28
Speaker 2: you know, giving her that massage and to ground her
16:31
Speaker 2: in her body. I fear a lot of changing women
16:33
Speaker 2: after we do something like that.
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Speaker 1: With the packages, I know there was a few different options.
16:39
Speaker 3: How many packages do you have?
16:40
Speaker 1: And obviously it then depends on budgets and what the
16:43
Speaker 1: moms are needing, and I know there's options for you
16:46
Speaker 1: to be supportive during pregnancy. You can be there at
16:48
Speaker 1: the birth, or you can just be their postpartum. I
16:51
Speaker 1: had you a little bit during pregnancy and then I
16:53
Speaker 1: had you postpartum. Could you quickly go over your packages briefly?
16:57
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, And everyone's different. I mean, obviously, if you
17:01
Speaker 2: are supporting women in birth, you may not have a
17:05
Speaker 2: a big postpartum package. You may have a big postpartum package.
17:09
Speaker 2: Some women just do both, and people just do postpartum.
17:12
Speaker 2: The cost of a doula can vary, and what they
17:15
Speaker 2: offer can vary. At the moment, I'm just offering my
17:19
Speaker 2: six week postpartum packages, you know. Obviously that can be
17:23
Speaker 2: so different for everybody, and you know what they do,
17:26
Speaker 2: it could be different to me. But I cook outside
17:30
Speaker 2: the home, so I'm not cooking while I'm in the
17:31
Speaker 2: home with you. I offer, yeah, around three hours, four hours,
17:36
Speaker 2: however long. I end up saying, that's not really something
17:39
Speaker 2: that I put a time on mostly once a week,
17:42
Speaker 2: but obviously I'm there throughout the week for talking, for
17:45
Speaker 2: voice messaging, all the things as well. Yeah, and then
17:49
Speaker 2: each week is different and it's very specific to the woman.
17:52
Speaker 2: The one thing I always took oac to me is
17:54
Speaker 2: the research shows that on average, a woman or a
17:57
Speaker 2: couple so spend more time on researching or the purchasing
18:02
Speaker 2: of a new car than they do on the post
18:05
Speaker 2: angle period or like you know, women spend thousands of
18:08
Speaker 2: dollars on a beautiful wedding dress, but then when they
18:11
Speaker 2: look at postpartum or a postpartum door, they just think, oh, no,
18:14
Speaker 2: I can't spend that money. I don't you know, we
18:16
Speaker 2: don't have that or whatever it might be. And I
18:18
Speaker 2: think it's really important that we value it and value
18:22
Speaker 2: obviously a dueler that value ourself in our postpartum and
18:26
Speaker 2: it be something that we either talk about in conception
18:30
Speaker 2: and start shaving for or have friends help pay, or
18:33
Speaker 2: however it happened, you know, instead of focusing on a
18:36
Speaker 2: nursery which maybe the kid doesn't even sleep in next
18:39
Speaker 2: first six months or whatever it might be, you know,
18:42
Speaker 2: and focus on the mom, because when a mom thrived
18:45
Speaker 2: to baby thrive, and then a family thrived in the
18:48
Speaker 2: community thrive exactly.
18:50
Speaker 1: I love that you mentioned I ongoing support, because it
18:53
Speaker 1: wasn't just when you came around once a week. It
18:55
Speaker 1: was like the moments when Tyler was like really upset
18:58
Speaker 1: at night and it like it was like, but this
19:00
Speaker 1: hasn't normally happened. Like, for example, I remember this one
19:03
Speaker 1: time I was trying to put it down at night
19:05
Speaker 1: and she was really great at going down at night,
19:07
Speaker 1: and this one time she was really unsettled and I
19:09
Speaker 1: messaged you in a panic and I was like, I
19:10
Speaker 1: don't what to do and you were like, oh, okay,
19:12
Speaker 1: like tell me where you're sitting in your house and
19:14
Speaker 1: I was like, we're in bed, we're watching movie and
19:15
Speaker 1: you were like what movie are you watching?
19:17
Speaker 3: And I was like, why is she asking this?
19:18
Speaker 1: But I was like, oh, it's a crime action And
19:21
Speaker 1: You're like, okay, is there any gun sounds or loud noises?
19:23
Speaker 3: I was like yeah.
19:24
Speaker 1: She's like okay, can you take Tyler into another room
19:27
Speaker 1: that's really quiet and you know, gently rock her and
19:30
Speaker 1: you know, maybe hummer song. And it was crazy that
19:33
Speaker 1: since I'm talking to another room and it was a
19:34
Speaker 1: calm environment with like.
19:36
Speaker 3: The noise she went down.
19:38
Speaker 1: I was like, yeah, just that little bit of like
19:40
Speaker 1: panic for me, but you were there to guide me
19:42
Speaker 1: and to just ask some further questions or there was
19:45
Speaker 1: another day that she was upset, and then like the
19:47
Speaker 1: next morning, you drop around these baby probotics and some
19:50
Speaker 1: other drinks for me, and you were like, try this,
19:52
Speaker 1: And it was just so cool to have someone there,
19:55
Speaker 1: Like I have beautiful friends, and I had friends that
19:57
Speaker 1: wanted to cook for me and be there for me
19:59
Speaker 1: as well, But there's just something really special about Adula
20:01
Speaker 1: who was so passionate, and that's what they're there for,
20:05
Speaker 1: Like there's no guilt of asking for help when you
20:08
Speaker 1: know that's why they're there for you.
20:09
Speaker 3: And I just can't recommend it enough.
20:12
Speaker 1: And I also want to say that like anyone that
20:13
Speaker 1: can't afford a douller, like this is something you can
20:16
Speaker 1: ask all of your friends instead of buying new clothes
20:18
Speaker 1: to the baby or nappis and having this big extravagant
20:21
Speaker 1: baby show, like everyone could chip in or yes, even
20:25
Speaker 1: setting up the meal train like that is something anyone
20:27
Speaker 1: can do. There's literally websites where you can set up
20:29
Speaker 1: a meal train for your friend and everyone books in
20:32
Speaker 1: the day and the week and the time that they're
20:33
Speaker 1: going to drop food off to the mum. Like there's
20:35
Speaker 1: so many beautiful ways that we can support mother's postpartum.
20:38
Speaker 1: And I think the more that we do the better.
20:40
Speaker 2: Absolutely. I always say the three things that your friends
20:43
Speaker 2: and family can do. One is to put money towards
20:46
Speaker 2: your post part of door. Yeah. Second is to be
20:48
Speaker 2: on the mill train in. The third is to donate
20:51
Speaker 2: your time. Yes, it might be to go and do
20:53
Speaker 2: the washes or rub the mom's feet or something like that.
20:57
Speaker 2: And you know, between all of your family's friends, community, neighbors,
21:00
Speaker 2: who you work with, whatever it will clip for you,
21:03
Speaker 2: between all those people, you're going to be able to
21:06
Speaker 2: create a little team that can support you. And so
21:09
Speaker 2: many moms don't want to ask for help, and I
21:12
Speaker 2: totally understand where it comes from. It made me really
21:15
Speaker 2: cringe when I first sled thinking about it as well.
21:17
Speaker 2: But the more I've seen it, and the more over
21:20
Speaker 2: the years that people do the middle chain or ask
21:23
Speaker 2: for help or whatever it be, you're actually doing your
21:26
Speaker 2: friends and your family a dish service because they want
21:29
Speaker 2: to help. But we just haven't been taught or shown
21:32
Speaker 2: how all we've been taught is that you come over,
21:35
Speaker 2: you google and google over the baby and make the
21:38
Speaker 2: mom make some bread or toasts and you know, coffee
21:42
Speaker 2: or what it might be and then you leave a
21:44
Speaker 2: couple of hours later and we're not taught. And even
21:48
Speaker 2: you know, my mom or anybody like, they all want
21:51
Speaker 2: to be there. They just need to be shown how.
21:53
Speaker 2: And everyone's like, oh, I couldn't ask them to put
21:55
Speaker 2: on the washing. There's nothing more like beautiful than watching
21:59
Speaker 2: your friend breathfeet on the couch while you go and
22:02
Speaker 2: do her washes like boneyes. I wait, paying people watching
22:05
Speaker 2: out nicer than I ever do my own. I just
22:07
Speaker 2: chuck mine on the water. But yeah, when you're doing
22:09
Speaker 2: it for somebody else, it's just so beautiful, and you
22:11
Speaker 2: are you're taking away something from people when you don't
22:15
Speaker 2: ask for help.
22:16
Speaker 1: Being held is so important, Like I remember there was
22:18
Speaker 1: times where you would come over and as soon as
22:21
Speaker 1: you would like walk in the room, I would just
22:22
Speaker 1: burst out crying. And it's you know these hormones. I'm exhausted,
22:26
Speaker 1: and I'm holding you know, you're holding it together for
22:28
Speaker 1: the family. At the moment you have a woman come
22:30
Speaker 1: in like yourself who just holds that space, you can
22:32
Speaker 1: finally just release and let go and you'd grab Taylor
22:35
Speaker 1: and I'd have a cry and then would get into
22:37
Speaker 1: a beautiful, nourishing treatment, and I would just feel so
22:39
Speaker 1: much better that I got to release that, and I didn't.
22:42
Speaker 1: I didn't have to hold it together all the time.
22:44
Speaker 1: But if anyone is listening and they're like, oh my gosh,
22:47
Speaker 1: I want to know more. I want to connect with you.
22:49
Speaker 1: I want to ask more questions, and maybe you want
22:51
Speaker 1: to book Lauren as your daughter, like where can they
22:53
Speaker 1: find you?
22:54
Speaker 2: So I am on Instagram mother bloom under poor.
22:59
Speaker 1: Yeah, absolutely well, thank you so so much. I will
23:01
Speaker 1: leave all of Lauren welcome. I'll leave all of your
23:04
Speaker 1: details the description box. If anyone does want to connect,
23:07
Speaker 1: you can go find her there. Otherwise, thank you for
23:09
Speaker 1: joining me and hopefully we'll talk again soon.
23:11
Speaker 2: Thank you, honey.
23:12
Speaker 1: Thanks bye bye