Latest / Overwhelmed Working Woman: Boost Productivity, Master Time Management, Overcome Overwhelm & Stop People Pleasing / #202| Why Hoping for a Perfect Holiday Is a Bad Idea (Unpopular Take)
Transcript
- 0:00Michelle Gauthier: It's like putting on your raincoat when you see the clouds, not because you want it to rain, but because you're smart enough to plan ahead for it.
- 0:07Michelle Gauthier: You're listening to Overwhelmed Working Woman, the podcast that helps you be more calm and more productive by doing less.
- 0:19Michelle Gauthier: I'm your host, Michelle Gauthier, a former Overwhelmed Working Woman and current life coach.
- 0:24Michelle Gauthier: On this show, we unpack the stress and pressure that today's Working Woman experiences.
- 0:29Michelle Gauthier: And in each episode, you'll get a strategy to bring more calm, ease, and relaxation to your life.
- 0:36Michelle Gauthier: Happy Thanksgiving to everybody celebrating here in the U.S.
- 0:43Michelle Gauthier: If you are hosting 12 people or showing up with a store-bought pie or hiding from your in-laws in the laundry room, this episode is for you.
- 0:53Michelle Gauthier: I have one solid tip for you that can make your Thanksgiving day smoother, calmer, and less emotionally draining.
- 1:02Michelle Gauthier: And if you are not in the US and you don't celebrate Thanksgiving, this is still a great tip that you can use on any old day of life, and especially when you're getting together with a whole bunch of people.
- 1:15Michelle Gauthier: So that one tip is lower your expectations to match reality.
- 1:21Michelle Gauthier: This is such a simple tip, but it can literally change your entire day.
- 1:26Michelle Gauthier: So you might go into Thanksgiving thinking everyone will be grateful and loving and emotionally mature, and nobody's going to be judgmental and all the food's going to be great and all the kids are going to be well behaved.
- 1:41Michelle Gauthier: Now we know that that is not going to happen, but there's something that happens in our mind where despite what we know as reality, for example, you could look at last year's Thanksgiving, and maybe that could be a predictor for this year's Thanksgiving.
- 1:53Michelle Gauthier: But somehow in our mind we always get these high expectations that everything is just going to be stress-free and easy.
- 2:00Michelle Gauthier: So the goal of this tool is to lower your expectations, not because you're giving up or thinking negatively, but just accepting reality ahead of time so that you're not surprised and resentful all day.
- 2:12Michelle Gauthier: It's like a kindness to yourself, a way to let yourself off the hook.
- 2:16Michelle Gauthier: So instead of thinking some version of today's going to be perfect, think instead, this is probably going to be chaotic, but I can handle that.
- 2:25Michelle Gauthier: It's like putting on your raincoat when you see the clouds, not because you want it to rain, but because you're smart enough to plan ahead for it.
- 2:32Michelle Gauthier: So think about this as putting on your raincoat.
- 2:36Michelle Gauthier: Here are some of the expectations that I think our brains offer on big days where everyone's getting together for a holiday, like Thanksgiving.
- 2:43Michelle Gauthier: Everyone will get along and be kind to each other, even if you have in the past experienced this not being true.
- 2:49Michelle Gauthier: And I think a good expectation to have is someone will definitely say something mildly offensive.
- 2:54Michelle Gauthier: And I'll nod and change the subject or just go refill my drink or what however I want to react to that.
- 3:00Michelle Gauthier: And that way, when the mildly offensive thing comes out, you don't have to be upset about it.
- 3:04Michelle Gauthier: You're like, oh, okay, yeah, I was right on that.
- 3:07Michelle Gauthier: In fact, sometimes it can be fun to play a little game inside your own mind that you try to predict what's going to happen in reality.
- 3:14Michelle Gauthier: And when it happens, you give yourself a point.
- 3:16Michelle Gauthier: It just gamifies and makes it kind of a funny experience that you're good at guessing what will really happen instead of having high expectations.
- 3:24Michelle Gauthier: If I'm the host and I don't check my expectation, it will be like dinner will be hot and on time and it will be perfect and everybody will love it.
- 3:32Michelle Gauthier: There's no way that's gonna happen, no matter where you're eating.
- 3:35Michelle Gauthier: Like something will be cold or late or somebody forgot to bring something, and we'll all survive anyway.
- 3:41Michelle Gauthier: So have that as your expectation.
- 3:43Michelle Gauthier: My kids are older now, but when they were little, I used to always think, well, they know it's a big day and they're all dressed up nice, and so they'll probably be really good today.
- 3:52Michelle Gauthier: Nope.
- 3:52Michelle Gauthier: Nope.
- 3:53Michelle Gauthier: A realistic expectation is that little kids will be kids, they'll be like overstimulated and asking for snacks five minutes after the Thanksgiving dinner because I didn't eat anything but the rolls.
- 4:04Michelle Gauthier: Just be really realistic about how the kids will probably act today, especially if you have littler kids.
- 4:11Michelle Gauthier: And then sometimes we get the idea because Thanksgiving is a holiday, that you'll feel rested and relaxed.
- 4:17Michelle Gauthier: Maybe you will.
- 4:18Michelle Gauthier: That would be great.
- 4:19Michelle Gauthier: But a more realistic expectation is I might feel stretched or tired or peopled out by 4 p.m.
- 4:25Michelle Gauthier: And that's totally normal for the holidays.
- 4:27Michelle Gauthier: And by the way, as a bonus, if you do have that expectation and then you do end up feeling relaxed all day, great.
- 4:34Michelle Gauthier: You can be wrong about your expectation, and then nothing is lost.
- 4:38Michelle Gauthier: By the way, I want to remind you if you have not listened to the episode from Monday yet, episode 201, I mentioned on there that my Black Friday offer comes out tomorrow.
- 4:49Michelle Gauthier: Unless you're a podcast listener, podcast listeners get early access.
- 4:53Michelle Gauthier: You can purchase the Black Friday offer today.
- 4:56Michelle Gauthier: This is the only time I ever discount my coaching.
- 4:59Michelle Gauthier: And the Black Friday offer this year is the your best year group for all of 2026.
- 5:05Michelle Gauthier: Click on the link in the show notes to get all of the details.
- 5:09Michelle Gauthier: And listen to Monday's episode if you want to know even more.
- 5:12Michelle Gauthier: I'd love to have you.
- 5:14Michelle Gauthier: So as you're going into your Thanksgiving day today, think about what you want your expectations to be.
- 5:20Michelle Gauthier: Think about if you were going to win $100, if what you predicted as reality and what really is reality match up and try to have very realistic expectations of what the day will bring and just enjoy it for what it is.
- 5:35Michelle Gauthier: That'll give you just permission to kind of laugh and to enjoy the things about the day that are good.
- 5:42Michelle Gauthier: Happy Thanksgiving, everybody.
- 5:44Michelle Gauthier: You got this.
- 5:45Michelle Gauthier: Thank you for listening to the Overwhelmed Working Woman podcast.
- 5:53Michelle Gauthier: If you want to learn more about my work, head over to my website at MichelleGauthier.com.
- 5:59Michelle Gauthier: See you next week.