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Healing After Parental Alienation: Finding Hope, Patience, and Peace · Bent Not Broken: Starting Over After Divorce | Post Divorce Life

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome back to this Ben's Not Broken Bonus episode.
• 0:04
  SPEAKER_00: I'm Coach Deborah and today I want to take a few moments to dive deeper into the conversation I had with Kendra Foley, a mother, an advocate, and a survivor who turned one of life's hardest experiences into a mission of healing and hope.
• 0:24
  SPEAKER_00: Parental alienation.
• 0:27
  SPEAKER_00: It's something many don't want to talk about, yet so many families are living it.
• 0:34
  SPEAKER_00: And it happens when one parent, intentionally or sometimes unknowingly, turns a child against the other parent.
• 0:44
  SPEAKER_00: It can start small, a comment here, a bit of guilt there, but over time it can erode the bond between a child and the parent they once loved deeply.
• 0:57
  SPEAKER_00: And that is heartbreaking.
• 0:59
  SPEAKER_00: Kendra's story was raw and real, full of heartbreak, confusion, and loss.
• 1:05
  SPEAKER_00: But what struck me most was her courage.
• 1:08
  SPEAKER_00: Even after years of separation from her children, she refused to let bitterness take root.
• 1:15
  SPEAKER_00: Instead, she chose understanding, forgiveness, and advocacy.
• 1:21
  SPEAKER_00: So let's talk about some of the lessons that she shared and what we can all take away from them.
• 1:29
  SPEAKER_00: Lesson one, educate yourself.
• 1:32
  SPEAKER_00: When you're in the middle of an emotional chaos, clarity is power.
• 1:37
  SPEAKER_00: Kinder reminded us how important it is to understand what's happening emotionally, legally, and psychologically.
• 1:47
  SPEAKER_00: Read books by experts like Dr.
• 1:50
  SPEAKER_00: Amy J.
• 1:50
  SPEAKER_00: Baker, connect with organizations such as the National Parents Organization, and learn the patterns of alienation.
• 2:01
  SPEAKER_00: When you know better, you can respond better.
• 2:05
  SPEAKER_00: Not out of fear or anger, but from a place of informed strength.
• 2:12
  SPEAKER_00: Lesson two, embrace the three P's patience, persistence, and prayer.
• 2:19
  SPEAKER_00: Healing takes time.
• 2:22
  SPEAKER_00: Patience teaches you that reconciliation won't happen overnight.
• 2:27
  SPEAKER_00: And persistence reminds you to keep showing up, sending love, cards, messages, even if it feels one-sided.
• 2:37
  SPEAKER_00: And prayer that keeps your heart open when everything else feels closed.
• 2:44
  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes the best thing you can do is pray for your child's heart and for your own to remain soft.
• 2:52
  SPEAKER_00: Lesson three, heal yourself while you wait.
• 2:56
  SPEAKER_00: Oh this one is so important.
• 2:58
  SPEAKER_00: Kindra shared how she rebuilt her life in the waiting, boxing, yoga, long walks, new friends, even getting a puppy.
• 3:07
  SPEAKER_00: And that season of waiting became a season of rebuilding.
• 3:12
  SPEAKER_00: Because you must prepare yourself emotionally, spiritually, and physically.
• 3:18
  SPEAKER_00: When your child comes back, they'll need the healthiest version of you.
• 3:23
  SPEAKER_00: Lesson four, set boundaries and protect your peace.
• 3:27
  SPEAKER_00: Boundaries are not walls.
• 3:30
  SPEAKER_00: They're bridges to healthy healing.
• 3:33
  SPEAKER_00: Turn off the phone when you need to.
• 3:36
  SPEAKER_00: Silence toxic messages.
• 3:38
  SPEAKER_00: And give yourself permission to breathe again.
• 3:41
  SPEAKER_00: You can't control what others say or do, but you can control how much access they have to your peace.
• 3:50
  SPEAKER_00: Lesson five.
• 3:55
  SPEAKER_00: Forgiveness is never easy, but it's not about letting someone off the hook.
• 4:01
  SPEAKER_00: It's about freeing yourself from the weight of resentment.
• 4:04
  SPEAKER_00: And as Kendra said, you can say you forgive, but true forgiveness happens when the anger no longer controls your emotions.
• 4:14
  SPEAKER_00: Forgiveness is a process and a gift to your future self.
• 4:20
  SPEAKER_00: My final reflection: if you're listening right now and walking through alienation or any type of family separation, please hear me.
• 4:31
  SPEAKER_00: Your worth hasn't changed.
• 4:33
  SPEAKER_00: You're still a good parent, and you are still deserving of love and peace.
• 4:39
  SPEAKER_00: Healing isn't linear.
• 4:42
  SPEAKER_00: Some days you'll feel strong, and other days broken.
• 4:47
  SPEAKER_00: But every small act of love, every breath, every prayer, it matters.
• 4:55
  SPEAKER_00: Stay patient, stay persistent, keep praying, because your story isn't over.
• 5:01
  SPEAKER_00: It's just being rewritten.
• 5:04
  SPEAKER_00: As Kendra's journey reminds us, there is hope.
• 5:08
  SPEAKER_00: With time, love, and faith, relationships can heal.
• 5:13
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you for joining me for this Bent Not Broken bonus episode.
• 5:18
  SPEAKER_00: If today's message spoke to your heart, share it with someone who needs a reminder that healing is possible.
• 5:25
  SPEAKER_00: Subscribe for more stories of courage, healing, and new beginnings.
• 5:29
  SPEAKER_00: And remember, you may be bent, but you are not broken.