Latest / She Rises with Ashy & Tijana / We don't agree - why would they say that? 🙄

Transcript

We don't agree - why would they say that? 🙄 · She Rises with Ashy & Tijana

• 0:05
  Speaker 1: Apoday production.
• 0:10
  Speaker 2: We begin today by acknowledging the traditional custodians of the
• 0:13
  Speaker 2: land on which we gather today and pay our respects
• 0:16
  Speaker 2: to their elders past and present. We extend that respect
• 0:19
  Speaker 2: to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander people's here today. Welcome
• 0:25
  Speaker 2: to the Grow and Glow Podcast.
• 0:27
  Speaker 1: I'm Ashy, I'm Kiara. This is a podcast where we learn, laugh,
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: and level up together. Let's go deep, let the emotions flow,
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: and find the lessons to grow and glow. Nothing is
• 0:37
  Speaker 1: off the table with Grow and Glow, and we're here
• 0:38
  Speaker 1: to be your expander.
• 0:43
  Speaker 2: Hello, It's time to Grow and Glow.
• 0:47
  Speaker 1: Hacky Wednesday or mad Monday? What are we? What day
• 0:52
  Speaker 1: is today? Wednesday? Wacky Wednesday? Yeah, so funny. Well today
• 0:59
  Speaker 1: we're not talking about quotes, but not the inspiring ones
• 1:02
  Speaker 1: that really light us up, dent the quotes that we
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: don't like, we don't agree with. Yes, and there's a few. Yeah, yeah, First.
• 1:11
  Speaker 2: Okay, My first one is don't let the hard days win.
• 1:15
  Speaker 2: Sometimes we just need to sit in a hard day
• 1:17
  Speaker 2: and let a hard day win and go.
• 1:19
  Speaker 1: I'm just having the better of me. I'm just having
• 1:21
  Speaker 1: a bad day today.
• 1:22
  Speaker 2: And you know, what you can say that and then
• 1:24
  Speaker 2: you can go I want to wake up fresh tomorrow
• 1:26
  Speaker 2: morning and it's a new day.
• 1:28
  Speaker 1: It's allowed. It's okay to have You're always gonna have
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: good days. I just like embrace the bad days. That's it.
• 1:33
  Speaker 2: And I feel like a lot of quotes are like that,
• 1:35
  Speaker 2: but sometimes we just have bad days and so notimes
• 1:37
  Speaker 2: you need a day Like Honestly, when I was going
• 1:39
  Speaker 2: through a lot of my hard times, I was going
• 1:41
  Speaker 2: through like once a week probably at that point in time,
• 1:44
  Speaker 2: I actually need like a whole day to just like
• 1:47
  Speaker 2: cry and like feel crap, feel sorry for myself. And
• 1:49
  Speaker 2: the next I was like okay, Like I'm okay now,
• 1:51
  Speaker 2: Like of course I had those moments and stuff, but
• 1:53
  Speaker 2: sometimes you do just need to let the day win
• 1:55
  Speaker 2: and go, Okay, tomorrow's a new one.
• 1:57
  Speaker 1: Let's wake up fresh and try again. Yes, that's normalized
• 2:00
  Speaker 1: having a bad day. Yeah, it's okay. I love that one.
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: My next one is don't quit? What do you mean
• 2:07
  Speaker 1: don't quit? Like? Why have we been sold the story
• 2:10
  Speaker 1: that you should never quit? And I have definitely taken
• 2:14
  Speaker 1: that on board from my whole life until now, And
• 2:17
  Speaker 1: I'm like, you know what, I actually look at other
• 2:19
  Speaker 1: people that quit and stop doing something that doesn't serve them.
• 2:22
  Speaker 1: I see them as so inspiring, Like how incredible and
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: brave for them to say, no, this doesn't serve me anymore. Yeah,
• 2:29
  Speaker 1: that's so freaking cool, because it's really hard to do. Yeah,
• 2:32
  Speaker 1: because you think giving up means that you're weak or
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: you're not good at it, or you've failed, or you're
• 2:36
  Speaker 1: letting people down, and all those thoughts keep you attached
• 2:39
  Speaker 1: to something, because you shouldn't give up if it's not
• 2:41
  Speaker 1: feeling good anymore, it doesn't feel aligned, or it's not
• 2:44
  Speaker 1: serving you, it doesn't let you up, you don't look
• 2:45
  Speaker 1: forward to it. You're allowed to quit on the relationship,
• 2:48
  Speaker 1: on the job, on the business, whatever it is. You
• 2:50
  Speaker 1: are allowed to quit when it doesn't feel good. So true.
• 2:53
  Speaker 2: I was listening to a podcast the other day and
• 2:55
  Speaker 2: they were saying that growing up in society, people had
• 2:58
  Speaker 2: a job and that was all that they did. Like say, like,
• 3:00
  Speaker 2: if your dad was a plumber, he was a plumber
• 3:02
  Speaker 2: at fifteen, and then he was a plumber all the
• 3:04
  Speaker 2: way up into so he was sixty. And then your
• 3:06
  Speaker 2: mum was a nurse, and then maybe she stopped when
• 3:08
  Speaker 2: she had children and then was just a stay at
• 3:09
  Speaker 2: home mum.
• 3:09
  Speaker 1: And that's all that she did. But it's so cool
• 3:11
  Speaker 1: that this.
• 3:12
  Speaker 2: Day and age, we can go, oh, I'm going to
• 3:13
  Speaker 2: try something new, isn't it? But we don't hold so
• 3:15
  Speaker 2: much like value in what we do and sticking to something,
• 3:19
  Speaker 2: and instead we're more fluid and just honoring ourselves and like, oh,
• 3:22
  Speaker 2: I want to try something new and spicing up our
• 3:24
  Speaker 2: life and it makes it more.
• 3:25
  Speaker 1: Interesting, it does. Or you do something that then you
• 3:28
  Speaker 1: get an opportunity to go over here. Yeah, it doesn't
• 3:30
  Speaker 1: mean you're quitting. It means that you're leveling up and
• 3:32
  Speaker 1: you're trying something new and you're learning new things and
• 3:34
  Speaker 1: you're expanding. Like how cool is that You're pivoting.
• 3:36
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you're not just stuck going to the same thing
• 3:39
  Speaker 2: every day, complaining about it, unhappy. You're going, Oh, that
• 3:42
  Speaker 2: doesn't feel good anymore, let's change it up.
• 3:44
  Speaker 1: So cool, but so brave, So brave. True strength is
• 3:47
  Speaker 1: knowing when to let go and when to give up
• 3:51
  Speaker 1: and being okay with that and having peace around that
• 3:53
  Speaker 1: and just being proud that you made that decision that's
• 3:56
  Speaker 1: right for you right now. Yeah, regardless of what anyone
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: else says.
• 4:00
  Speaker 2: I like consistency. Do not introduce me to a vibe
• 4:04
  Speaker 2: if you cannot make it. So it's basically saying that
• 4:07
  Speaker 2: if you meet someone on their best day and a
• 4:09
  Speaker 2: high vibe and great, you need to stay consistent with
• 4:12
  Speaker 2: that person rather than evan flowing out of like whether
• 4:15
  Speaker 2: you're going through a hard season, whether something's popping up,
• 4:18
  Speaker 2: whether you're feeling stretched, whether you're feeling this, whether you're
• 4:20
  Speaker 2: feeling uncomfortable. I would just read that and I was
• 4:22
  Speaker 2: like freaking honestly, it made me feel the same way.
• 4:26
  Speaker 2: So we spoke about this probably a month ago, and
• 4:28
  Speaker 2: we were screenshotting them. I saw this one pop up
• 4:29
  Speaker 2: and I was like, oh, it got me. Yeah, I
• 4:31
  Speaker 2: don't like that the person you show up for, that's
• 4:33
  Speaker 2: what it's saying. You have to be that person every
• 4:35
  Speaker 2: time time, all the time.
• 4:36
  Speaker 1: God, that's so much pressure, so much pressure. I wake
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: up tomorrow and I'll feel different how I feel today. Yeah,
• 4:41
  Speaker 1: that's really not a great one.
• 4:43
  Speaker 2: And there were so many likes on some of these, Yeah,
• 4:45
  Speaker 2: and I was like, wow.
• 4:47
  Speaker 1: The expectations people have on other people. Yeah, that's a
• 4:50
  Speaker 1: big reflection there. Right, there's no room for mistakes. There's
• 4:54
  Speaker 1: no room for different lous. Yes, even in your relationship.
• 4:59
  Speaker 1: Imagine getting with someone, like meeting someone and they expect
• 5:02
  Speaker 1: you to be the high Vibe twenty four seven no
• 5:04
  Speaker 1: matter what. It's dehumanizing people, isn't it. Yeah. My next
• 5:07
  Speaker 1: one is around toxic diet culture. But nothing tastes as
• 5:11
  Speaker 1: good as skinny feels. Oh do you remember hearing that?
• 5:14
  Speaker 1: I remember hearing this, I don't know, maybe ten years ago.
• 5:17
  Speaker 1: That was like the whole thigh gap and like just
• 5:20
  Speaker 1: being as skinny as you can was so in And
• 5:22
  Speaker 1: that's what people used to say, like, nothing tastes good,
• 5:25
  Speaker 1: and I'm like, what chocolate does? Got that chocolate? Chocolate
• 5:28
  Speaker 1: tastes really good. I forgot that quote until you said that.
• 5:30
  Speaker 1: I'd rather be chocolate and have a bit more curves
• 5:32
  Speaker 1: and be skinny and not enjoy chocolate. First of my
• 5:34
  Speaker 1: life be happy and comfort for chocolate makes me happy exactly.
• 5:39
  Speaker 1: So yeah, I really don't like that one, and I
• 5:41
  Speaker 1: really hope my daughter never hears that. That's awful.
• 5:44
  Speaker 2: Yeah, And you know the crazy thing is all these
• 5:45
  Speaker 2: people that are super skinny are probably way less happy,
• 5:49
  Speaker 2: definitely then they would be if they just enjoyed themselves,
• 5:53
  Speaker 2: enjoyed life.
• 5:54
  Speaker 1: Yeah, like we say, enjoy going out to dinners and
• 5:56
  Speaker 1: enjoying that dessert and that birthday cake and that celebratory
• 5:59
  Speaker 1: drink whatever. It is actually enjoying life and life's celebrations,
• 6:03
  Speaker 1: which a lot of the time involved you know, food
• 6:06
  Speaker 1: and drinks and sweets and whatever, but never enjoying that
• 6:10
  Speaker 1: because you want to be skinny. Yeah, that's bad. It's
• 6:13
  Speaker 1: sad because a lot of women would still be living
• 6:15
  Speaker 1: by that. Yes, but no, thank.
• 6:17
  Speaker 2: You expect nothing, appreciate everything. I don't think we should
• 6:21
  Speaker 2: expect nothing.
• 6:22
  Speaker 1: Expect nothing. Yeah, you've given me some hard twitters.
• 6:26
  Speaker 2: I think that we should definitely have expectations on how
• 6:29
  Speaker 2: we want to be treated, how we should be respected,
• 6:33
  Speaker 2: how people should make us feel. I think, yeah, we
• 6:36
  Speaker 2: should have expectations and standards.
• 6:38
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and you've really helped me with that because I've
• 6:40
  Speaker 1: gone to Kiara. I think we're just a certain friendship,
• 6:42
  Speaker 1: I think, and I'm like, you know, I shouldn't expect anything,
• 6:45
  Speaker 1: and blah blah blah, and you're like, why the bare minimum?
• 6:48
  Speaker 1: Is that? What all you think that you're worth? And
• 6:50
  Speaker 1: it was like really challenging to hear that, and I
• 6:52
  Speaker 1: was like shit, and it really made me reflect and go,
• 6:55
  Speaker 1: holy shit, I'm allowed to have standards of how I
• 6:58
  Speaker 1: would like to be treated in a friendship or a connection.
• 7:00
  Speaker 1: We have that in our intimate relationships. Why do we
• 7:03
  Speaker 1: not have that in other relationships? That's so true. Yeah,
• 7:06
  Speaker 1: Like we have a certain stand of how you want
• 7:07
  Speaker 1: to be treated and not treated with our intimate partner, right,
• 7:10
  Speaker 1: lots of them. It's not unconditional, it's like, yeah, but
• 7:13
  Speaker 1: in other relationships. So that's a really good one. So true.
• 7:16
  Speaker 2: And like even like when all these things come up
• 7:18
  Speaker 2: with Ashley too, Like what I say to her is
• 7:20
  Speaker 2: I'm like, you are such a loyal friend, you are
• 7:22
  Speaker 2: such a caring friend. You are so giving and kind
• 7:24
  Speaker 2: with your time, like your effort, just everything. So why
• 7:28
  Speaker 2: should you not expect that back? Yeah, to an extent.
• 7:32
  Speaker 1: To an extent, Yeah, I don't expect you to be
• 7:34
  Speaker 1: exactly how I am. We do have different love languages
• 7:37
  Speaker 1: and like different resources and different amounts of money or whatever.
• 7:41
  Speaker 1: But I think just in that particular situation, you were like,
• 7:44
  Speaker 1: you're literally asking for the bare minimum. You are not
• 7:46
  Speaker 1: asking for it. No, that's when you check in with
• 7:49
  Speaker 1: your standards. That's exactly right.
• 7:51
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and then what was the second half of it,
• 7:53
  Speaker 2: Appreciate everything.
• 7:54
  Speaker 1: I do love a quote that's like swap expectations for appreciation.
• 7:58
  Speaker 1: I feel like we try to really live in that
• 8:00
  Speaker 1: energy of appreciating, you know, the cards that life gives
• 8:02
  Speaker 1: us and what we do have, rather than focusing on
• 8:04
  Speaker 1: what you don't have.
• 8:05
  Speaker 2: But I think everything's a little bit that positive positive.
• 8:09
  Speaker 1: Definitely, the pensure's gone swung a little bit that way. Yeah, yeah,
• 8:12
  Speaker 1: and everything all the time. Yea sounds great. Yes, you're
• 8:15
  Speaker 1: allowed to have a little pity party for yourself. Yeah.
• 8:17
  Speaker 1: I feel like a few episodes ago, I'm going to
• 8:19
  Speaker 1: contradict myself here. I said nothing worthwhile is ever easy.
• 8:23
  Speaker 1: I take that back. How good that we can just change?
• 8:26
  Speaker 1: I take that back. I don't like it. I've changed
• 8:29
  Speaker 1: my mind. And guess what, that's okay to change your mind.
• 8:31
  Speaker 1: It is ok to change. I really hope we listened
• 8:33
  Speaker 1: back to episodes in a couple of years time and go,
• 8:35
  Speaker 1: oh oh we will. Yeah.
• 8:36
  Speaker 2: I would even listen back to last year's ones and
• 8:38
  Speaker 2: do that.
• 8:38
  Speaker 1: Which is great. It's anyone listening. If you think we
• 8:40
  Speaker 1: have different opinions and change our mind. We have we
• 8:42
  Speaker 1: hope we contradict ourselves. Yeah, I don't understand. I hope
• 8:45
  Speaker 1: I listen back and go ooh yeah, because you grow
• 8:48
  Speaker 1: and you learn and you know, do things differently. But yeah,
• 8:51
  Speaker 1: nothing worthwhile is easy. I feel like this business with you,
• 8:55
  Speaker 1: which we didn't mean for it to turn into a
• 8:57
  Speaker 1: business but it is now, it's been so easy. It's
• 9:00
  Speaker 1: been really easy and so flowy and so fun. And
• 9:03
  Speaker 1: there's been no drama and stress, like apart from taking
• 9:07
  Speaker 1: a few wrong turns this morning, and like delays in
• 9:11
  Speaker 1: a shipment order or like there's been little bits and
• 9:14
  Speaker 1: pieces that are like, oh, what are we gonna do here?
• 9:16
  Speaker 1: But this has been the easiest, most fulfilling, fun project.
• 9:21
  Speaker 2: And I think it's because we don't put pressure on it.
• 9:23
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and it is so worthwhile and it's so impactful
• 9:26
  Speaker 1: and it's so positive and it fills up so much
• 9:29
  Speaker 1: of my buckets. So that's been really easy. So it
• 9:31
  Speaker 1: doesn't always have to be hard. I mean, I think
• 9:34
  Speaker 1: business can be very very hard, and relationships can be
• 9:37
  Speaker 1: really hard, and inner work can be really hard, and
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: that's so still worthwhile. But not everything is going to
• 9:42
  Speaker 1: be really hard. Some things can just be really easy
• 9:45
  Speaker 1: and flowy. Yeah, some friendships, some relationships, some things in work.
• 9:48
  Speaker 1: I mean, it is cool, amazing.
• 9:50
  Speaker 2: This has been the most flowy, easiest thing compared to
• 9:53
  Speaker 2: all the other businesses I've done.
• 9:54
  Speaker 1: You know, it's just like you know, launches and everything
• 9:57
  Speaker 1: just pops up and happens. And to this, even the launches,
• 10:00
  Speaker 1: we've had no website issues and nothing like.
• 10:02
  Speaker 2: But we've said since day OT, we're like, we want
• 10:04
  Speaker 2: this to be like a passion project. We don't want
• 10:06
  Speaker 2: the pressure. So we don't want it to be like there's.
• 10:08
  Speaker 1: No deadline, no pressure. If one person can't do something,
• 10:11
  Speaker 1: the other person picks up the extra effort. It's so amazing,
• 10:15
  Speaker 1: Like the times we want to launch things or do things,
• 10:17
  Speaker 1: it's just whenever it feels good for us. So we've
• 10:20
  Speaker 1: got time and space, Like, it's so nice not to
• 10:22
  Speaker 1: have that pressure. And I think because we're in that energy,
• 10:25
  Speaker 1: we were unconsciously in that energy or we were conscious
• 10:27
  Speaker 1: with it, in that energy, it just creates us. Yeah,
• 10:30
  Speaker 1: it creates more of that opportunity and more of that energy,
• 10:33
  Speaker 1: and more of that abundance with goals and hitting milestones
• 10:36
  Speaker 1: and financial things and everything. It just it does keep
• 10:39
  Speaker 1: coming to us because we're in that energy.
• 10:41
  Speaker 2: So true, we're not resisting with anything, We're just flowing
• 10:44
  Speaker 2: with it.
• 10:44
  Speaker 1: That's manifestation, right, We're in the flow.
• 10:47
  Speaker 2: Sometimes it's better to just say nothing and just take
• 10:50
  Speaker 2: note of what you see. I think as long as
• 10:52
  Speaker 2: we can calmly communicate, we should say something if we
• 10:55
  Speaker 2: feel like we need to.
• 10:57
  Speaker 1: Mmmm, that's a really interesting one. Mm. Sometimes I do
• 11:01
  Speaker 1: choose to say nothing because I feel like I'm talking
• 11:04
  Speaker 1: to a brick. Yeah, and are we trying to reason
• 11:06
  Speaker 1: with the unreasonable and emotionally protecting yourself? Yeah, because I
• 11:10
  Speaker 1: feel like sometimes if I voice something and they can't
• 11:12
  Speaker 1: hold space or even try to begin to understand what
• 11:15
  Speaker 1: I'm saying, I end up more frustrated. So then it's
• 11:18
  Speaker 1: like it's just not worth it. I prefer to just
• 11:19
  Speaker 1: devent it out to Steve or a friend or journal
• 11:21
  Speaker 1: on it sometimes. But then sometimes, like it depends on
• 11:25
  Speaker 1: the situation. Hey, I see where you're coming from, and
• 11:27
  Speaker 1: I like to attempt at least once. Yeah.
• 11:29
  Speaker 2: Personally, yeah, I like to try to reason or explain
• 11:33
  Speaker 2: or even if it's not getting through, sometimes writing a letter, yeah,
• 11:35
  Speaker 2: because it's not very often that things don't get through
• 11:37
  Speaker 2: some only one of there's like really big situations. But yeah,
• 11:40
  Speaker 2: I just think that we shouldn't always be okay with
• 11:43
  Speaker 2: just being like, okay, that's happened to now, I don't
• 11:45
  Speaker 2: have to say anything.
• 11:46
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you don't have to put up with them. And
• 11:47
  Speaker 1: you're big talkers. I feel like, yeah, and as.
• 11:49
  Speaker 2: Long as you can calmly communicate and you're not reactive
• 11:52
  Speaker 2: and you're at that point.
• 11:53
  Speaker 1: I feel like, yeah, this last couple of years, me
• 11:55
  Speaker 1: and you've had to have quite a lot of hard
• 11:56
  Speaker 1: conversations with people in our lives. And some have stuck
• 11:59
  Speaker 1: around and some have like dwindled away. But we're definitely
• 12:02
  Speaker 1: big communicators. Like we're not one to just sweep under
• 12:04
  Speaker 1: the rug and like don't say anything because they might
• 12:06
  Speaker 1: upset us. That's a hard thing to learn to do though,
• 12:08
  Speaker 1: because it, once again, it takes such to be vulnerable, Like, yeah,
• 12:11
  Speaker 1: you have to be so brave because you're putting your
• 12:13
  Speaker 1: heart on the line. Whether they'll write back, what will
• 12:16
  Speaker 1: they say, how they respond, can they hold space? And
• 12:19
  Speaker 1: if none of that's being received, it's like a hard
• 12:21
  Speaker 1: pill to swallow. But I love that you know where
• 12:24
  Speaker 1: you stand. Yeah, like you know how some say nothing,
• 12:27
  Speaker 1: it says a lot, that's it.
• 12:28
  Speaker 2: But like we know where we stand. Whereas when you're
• 12:30
  Speaker 2: in that in between, you're like, what's going on?
• 12:31
  Speaker 1: This?
• 12:32
  Speaker 2: What's going on the fact. When you communicate and you
• 12:33
  Speaker 2: get it across and you get your answer, it's like closure.
• 12:36
  Speaker 1: It's closure. Yes, yeah, nothing worse than not having closure.
• 12:39
  Speaker 2: Hey, I know it's a really uncomfortable feeling.
• 12:41
  Speaker 1: I think that's a bit of the anxious attachment style though. Hey, yeah,
• 12:44
  Speaker 1: because you like want an answer and you want to
• 12:46
  Speaker 1: like know where you're at. That's it. But it definitely
• 12:49
  Speaker 1: feels good for me. Yeah. Closure, Oh yeah, you move on,
• 12:53
  Speaker 1: be free, and they can move on. You can energetically
• 12:56
  Speaker 1: like unplugged. I think we have so many are like visuals.
• 12:59
  Speaker 1: I remember Taylor teaching me this, Like we are energetically
• 13:02
  Speaker 1: plugged into so many different people. And when you got closure,
• 13:05
  Speaker 1: you can pull out that cord and be free, let
• 13:07
  Speaker 1: it go.
• 13:08
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 13:08
  Speaker 1: But if there's no closure, I feel like you keep
• 13:09
  Speaker 1: the cord plugged in. Even if it's like from Afar
• 13:11
  Speaker 1: and it's a really long cord, it's still like plugged
• 13:13
  Speaker 1: in over there. Yeah, it lives in your head rent free.
• 13:16
  Speaker 1: But until you finally unplug and that's done, you just
• 13:19
  Speaker 1: feel so much better, so true, so much light. You're
• 13:22
  Speaker 1: not holding onto it anymore. It's really hard when you
• 13:24
  Speaker 1: have energetic plugs to people that you're biologically plugged into,
• 13:27
  Speaker 1: like your mother and father, it's not as easy to
• 13:31
  Speaker 1: unplug and let go. You're a part of them. Yeah,
• 13:33
  Speaker 1: you like literally grew inside your mom's stomach, even like
• 13:36
  Speaker 1: not knowing my real father. It's every now and again,
• 13:38
  Speaker 1: it still pops into my head. I'm biologically unplugged into
• 13:41
  Speaker 1: this man somewhere along the lines, you know, I'm part
• 13:44
  Speaker 1: of his DNA. Yeah, it's really hard to unplug from family.
• 13:47
  Speaker 1: But like other people, if you can do that, it's
• 13:50
  Speaker 1: so healthy. Yeah, it is so healthy. That's the exact
• 13:52
  Speaker 1: right word. Yeah. Yeah, that's strange energy. Oh so draining.
• 13:56
  Speaker 1: No thanks. My last one is another toxic diet culture.
• 14:00
  Speaker 1: One moment on the lips forever on the hips. I've
• 14:04
  Speaker 1: heard someone actually can this one. No, do you know
• 14:08
  Speaker 1: it takes like like seven thousand calories or something to
• 14:10
  Speaker 1: put on a killer of fat. Wow, No, a moment
• 14:14
  Speaker 1: of chocolate is not going to be on your hips
• 14:18
  Speaker 1: on the lips for ever on the hips, and what
• 14:19
  Speaker 1: do I mean for ever on the hips? You can
• 14:21
  Speaker 1: lose weight, you can tone up, you can go to
• 14:23
  Speaker 1: the gym. Like no, it's the stupidest quote I've ever heard,
• 14:26
  Speaker 1: But I remember this being really prominent and float around
• 14:29
  Speaker 1: heaps back when I first started in the health and
• 14:31
  Speaker 1: fitness industry. I feel like the health and fitness industry
• 14:33
  Speaker 1: years ago was so much more toxic. There's such a
• 14:37
  Speaker 1: movement now.
• 14:38
  Speaker 2: But none of us even realize that, isn't it crazy.
• 14:41
  Speaker 2: I'm sure like I contributed to it, but like me too.
• 14:43
  Speaker 2: When we were speaking on that other episode about certain
• 14:45
  Speaker 2: ways that you know, I appeared online and that like, yeah,
• 14:47
  Speaker 2: me too, but definitely at the time and place that.
• 14:50
  Speaker 1: Was then am I actually saw this video the other day.
• 14:52
  Speaker 1: It was not nice to see and it was I
• 14:55
  Speaker 1: don't know, it's so this TikTok trending sound and it's
• 14:59
  Speaker 1: something in the past. Anyways, they put up my old
• 15:01
  Speaker 1: diet plans and then there was all these comments. I
• 15:03
  Speaker 1: never read this stuff, but I kept getting tagged and
• 15:05
  Speaker 1: tagged and tagged, and I was like, shit, what is this?
• 15:07
  Speaker 1: And it just caught me the vunerable moment I read
• 15:09
  Speaker 1: the comments and just so many were like, oh, Ash,
• 15:11
  Speaker 1: you know, toxic diet culture, and she used to encourage
• 15:14
  Speaker 1: us to eat rye bread wraps and kangaroo sausages. And
• 15:18
  Speaker 1: my whole philosophy around health has been clean eating, and
• 15:21
  Speaker 1: I still stand by that. I think the less processed
• 15:24
  Speaker 1: foods that we eat, and the more we can eat
• 15:25
  Speaker 1: whole foods that nature has grown us, and like meat fruits,
• 15:29
  Speaker 1: very paleo wave living, I believe that is the best
• 15:32
  Speaker 1: for majority of us. So I still stand by that.
• 15:35
  Speaker 1: But it's interesting how so many people think they accused
• 15:38
  Speaker 1: me of causing them to have an eating disorder because
• 15:40
  Speaker 1: I'm so focused on the healthy food that they more
• 15:42
  Speaker 1: took it as like I'm saying there's good and bad foods.
• 15:45
  Speaker 1: But I was just like, let's be as clean as possible,
• 15:48
  Speaker 1: and these are healthier alternatives. Yeah, but because I recommend
• 15:51
  Speaker 1: certain products, and then these girls got obsessed with these products,
• 15:54
  Speaker 1: like the ry wraps, like I don't care what wrap
• 15:56
  Speaker 1: you have. That was just a rap that I really enjoyed. Yeah,
• 15:58
  Speaker 1: Like kangaroo sausages are very high protein and very lean meat. Yeah,
• 16:03
  Speaker 1: I wanted to be lean and strong, so I went
• 16:05
  Speaker 1: for the leanest, highest protein option. But like these days,
• 16:08
  Speaker 1: I'm not as strict, but yeah, I definitely think I
• 16:11
  Speaker 1: probably contributed to parts of that. But once again, like
• 16:14
  Speaker 1: we all have a choice through follow and what we eat,
• 16:16
  Speaker 1: what we take on, So I can't take full responsibility
• 16:19
  Speaker 1: where everyone's at. But back then that's what it was
• 16:23
  Speaker 1: for a lot of people, whereas now there's this movement
• 16:26
  Speaker 1: of intuitive eating and I love that. It's like more
• 16:28
  Speaker 1: listening to what feels good for your body. For you. You
• 16:30
  Speaker 1: don't love gluten, I can tolerate it really well. Some
• 16:33
  Speaker 1: people can't have dairy, choose a vegan protein paddle, And
• 16:35
  Speaker 1: there's a big movement on looking after our hormones, getting
• 16:38
  Speaker 1: off the pill and healthy fats are good for you.
• 16:40
  Speaker 1: They good for your brain, healthy, good for your skin,
• 16:42
  Speaker 1: They're good for you.
• 16:42
  Speaker 2: Know.
• 16:43
  Speaker 1: I feel like there's a movement more towards health. There's
• 16:46
  Speaker 1: still a very heavy focused on and I never went
• 16:49
  Speaker 1: down this path, but a lot of finished coaches are
• 16:52
  Speaker 1: still around calories and macros, which for me, personally working
• 16:56
  Speaker 1: with women, I found that quite toxic because they're so
• 16:58
  Speaker 1: focused on the number is and it's like if you
• 17:01
  Speaker 1: eat five hundred calories of McDonald's compared to five hundred
• 17:04
  Speaker 1: calories of beds. It's not going to compare. It can't compare.
• 17:07
  Speaker 1: Process is different in your body. You have different nutrients
• 17:10
  Speaker 1: and well, lack of nutrients McDonald's is going to affect
• 17:13
  Speaker 1: your skin, your digestion, the way you feel, the insulin spike, vegetables, fiber, vitamins, minerals, nutrients, like,
• 17:21
  Speaker 1: you can't compare them. But yeah, when you're focus on
• 17:23
  Speaker 1: calories or macros like that can sometimes cause you know,
• 17:27
  Speaker 1: not a healthy relationship with food. So anyway, that's a
• 17:30
  Speaker 1: whole other topic. It's good. Yeah, that quote just does
• 17:34
  Speaker 1: not sit okay with me. No, I can't wait for
• 17:37
  Speaker 1: our girls to grow up like with us as role models,
• 17:39
  Speaker 1: Like I can't wait to just even now, I feel
• 17:42
  Speaker 1: like we've got such a nice healthy balance with our kids,
• 17:45
  Speaker 1: Like I think people think me being in the health
• 17:46
  Speaker 1: and fitness industry, that my kids be on this super
• 17:49
  Speaker 1: strict like everything's healthy and whole foods, And yeah, majority
• 17:52
  Speaker 1: of the foods that I feed them are really good
• 17:54
  Speaker 1: for them. Because I want them to feel their best.
• 17:55
  Speaker 1: I want them to feel their bodies, I want them
• 17:57
  Speaker 1: to have good sleep, I want them to have balanced
• 17:59
  Speaker 1: hormones as they grow. That's super important to me. I
• 18:01
  Speaker 1: want them to live till their hundred feeling amazing. But yeah,
• 18:04
  Speaker 1: we go for ice. Yeah yeah. Me and Tarji we
• 18:06
  Speaker 1: love having a little Oh my god, if you had
• 18:08
  Speaker 1: the minicyclone, oh yeah, they're amazing. Oh yeah. Our kids
• 18:11
  Speaker 1: will love them too, the cyclones for the mini ones,
• 18:14
  Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, I love them. Like yeah, we have
• 18:17
  Speaker 1: treats and it's all about this balanced approach of living.
• 18:19
  Speaker 1: And even when we go to birthday parties or whatever,
• 18:21
  Speaker 1: I let TARGI whatever he wants. If it feels sick,
• 18:23
  Speaker 1: I'm like, cool, what have we learned from this? Do
• 18:25
  Speaker 1: you have five cupcakes? You feel lucky? That hurts your tummy?
• 18:28
  Speaker 1: Let's time next time? Just have one and he gets
• 18:31
  Speaker 1: to learn what feels good for his body and what doesn't.
• 18:33
  Speaker 1: But there's no pressure around it.
• 18:35
  Speaker 2: And I just gosh, that's so cool, so cool. And
• 18:37
  Speaker 2: even Miller, babe, you would be shook. You know, she's
• 18:40
  Speaker 2: little old woman, Miller, sixty years old. Her with her
• 18:46
  Speaker 2: intuitive eating is insane.
• 18:48
  Speaker 1: It's a greater, aren't they? Hey, babe, do you want
• 18:50
  Speaker 1: me to make her up? Never had too much gluten
• 18:51
  Speaker 1: today because she's gluten intolerance. I did not know that.
• 18:53
  Speaker 2: So she's gluten intolerance, so she only has specific amounts.
• 18:56
  Speaker 2: And then I'll even say she's like, I feel like
• 18:57
  Speaker 2: I really need like a smoothie, Mom, can you make
• 18:59
  Speaker 2: me a smoothie? And like sure, Hey, Mom, I really
• 19:01
  Speaker 2: feel like I want a banana. Like she's just so
• 19:04
  Speaker 2: and she goes, oh. Usually when I feel like this,
• 19:06
  Speaker 2: for have a banana, like gives me more energy. Like
• 19:08
  Speaker 2: she's insane, babe. You would hear her talk.
• 19:10
  Speaker 1: About food and you would literally be so hackled. Would
• 19:13
  Speaker 1: feel like she's like my little spirit animal. Honestly, she's
• 19:16
  Speaker 1: so cute. She's so funny.
• 19:18
  Speaker 2: And even if we go to a birthday party she
• 19:20
  Speaker 2: got gluten, has I got gluten because obviously it makes
• 19:22
  Speaker 2: her tummy soft.
• 19:22
  Speaker 1: She but she knows.
• 19:24
  Speaker 2: She's like she can pretty much have like a little
• 19:25
  Speaker 2: palm full of gluten a day. Any more than that,
• 19:27
  Speaker 2: like she's literally vomiting, like she's really struggles with gluten.
• 19:31
  Speaker 1: I do not know.
• 19:32
  Speaker 2: She has like two meals with gluten in it. She's
• 19:34
  Speaker 2: done for the next day, I know.
• 19:36
  Speaker 1: But what it's taught her.
• 19:38
  Speaker 2: Is to listen and now she really she's way more
• 19:42
  Speaker 2: in true with her body, like even then Lincoln, I
• 19:44
  Speaker 2: know she's older and everything like that, but like, fuck,
• 19:46
  Speaker 2: she's more true with her body sometimes than me.
• 19:48
  Speaker 1: That's incredible. I'm like, girl, you're amazing. I just feel
• 19:51
  Speaker 1: like some people are on this earth to heal. I
• 19:53
  Speaker 1: feel like she's going to just have a big impact
• 19:55
  Speaker 1: on the world.
• 19:56
  Speaker 2: And even like I was saying to Ashi when we're
• 19:57
  Speaker 2: coming up here, I was explaining to her what Ashi
• 19:59
  Speaker 2: and I do and I said, like, we go on
• 20:00
  Speaker 2: the podcast and we helped to make other women feel empowered,
• 20:03
  Speaker 2: me feel this, and she like got it. And when
• 20:05
  Speaker 2: I she's like, you have a great day talking to
• 20:07
  Speaker 2: all the women and the men and whoever listens, and
• 20:09
  Speaker 2: like she fully like she just got it. And she
• 20:11
  Speaker 2: went from being like upset that I was leaving to
• 20:13
  Speaker 2: being like, oh wow, you go mum.
• 20:15
  Speaker 1: Wow, which is so cool, so cool and so like
• 20:19
  Speaker 1: awesome for her age to have that awareness to understand it.
• 20:22
  Speaker 1: She's so funny, funny character. You know. A charge asked
• 20:26
  Speaker 1: me the other day and Steve was cracking up. It
• 20:28
  Speaker 1: was a really good question. We're just driving to footy
• 20:32
  Speaker 1: and he goes, Mom said yeah, honey, why do you
• 20:35
  Speaker 1: wear makeup? When you said it doesn't matter what we
• 20:37
  Speaker 1: look like? Oh yeah, I've had that one as well.
• 20:39
  Speaker 1: I was like wow, and Steve laughed and like what's funny?
• 20:43
  Speaker 1: And I was like, we're just geeling because like you're
• 20:45
  Speaker 1: so clever and you're so smart. And Steve was like,
• 20:47
  Speaker 1: really good pick up, Mum, why do you wear makeup?
• 20:50
  Speaker 1: And I said, I personally think I wear makeup because
• 20:54
  Speaker 1: it's like, ah, you know, when you like to paint
• 20:55
  Speaker 1: a picture or whatever, and it just enhances and it's fun,
• 20:57
  Speaker 1: it's creative, and it's also Mummy's like me time just
• 21:00
  Speaker 1: makes me feel really good. But most of the time,
• 21:02
  Speaker 1: like you see, mommy doesn't wear makeup. It's like for
• 21:05
  Speaker 1: occasions when I want to like feel good, I just
• 21:07
  Speaker 1: I do look at it like art, but I definitely
• 21:09
  Speaker 1: don't need it and it doesn't define my worth and
• 21:11
  Speaker 1: I don't feel like it makes me a better person
• 21:13
  Speaker 1: or anything like that. But it's like really interesting question. Yeah,
• 21:18
  Speaker 1: all start coming up. Hey so cool and Mille is
• 21:21
  Speaker 1: so cute.
• 21:21
  Speaker 2: If I don't have my makeup on, She's like, oh Mommy,
• 21:24
  Speaker 2: I love you without your makeup. Oh She'll actually comment,
• 21:26
  Speaker 2: and I'm like, go, you make me not win away
• 21:27
  Speaker 2: makeup so nuts, it's crazy. Alright, I've got one more quote,
• 21:31
  Speaker 2: do one thing every day that scares you. I feel
• 21:34
  Speaker 2: like this would not make me have a well regulated
• 21:36
  Speaker 2: never sism.
• 21:38
  Speaker 1: So when I round to be on edge flight.
• 21:41
  Speaker 2: Constantly be on fire to flight, do one thing scares you.
• 21:43
  Speaker 2: And that's one that I've seen around a fair bit.
• 21:44
  Speaker 1: And I was like that quite a bit too. Yeah,
• 21:46
  Speaker 1: I was like, no, I don't think find new things
• 21:48
  Speaker 1: every single day that scares you. I don't know. No,
• 21:51
  Speaker 1: that's not even realistic.
• 21:52
  Speaker 2: Sometimes you just need to be well regulated.
• 21:54
  Speaker 1: And definitely especially in the hardest seasons. Yes. Wow, And
• 21:58
  Speaker 1: we're going to enter on a lighter not so.
• 22:00
  Speaker 2: For the end of this episode, we are going to
• 22:02
  Speaker 2: share with you guys some Instagram accounts that we just
• 22:04
  Speaker 2: absolutely love.
• 22:05
  Speaker 1: Yes, that we think must follow. Yes, I'll go first,
• 22:08
  Speaker 1: go for it. The Holistic Psychologist. Yes, she is just
• 22:12
  Speaker 1: my number one incredible the way that she breaks down
• 22:16
  Speaker 1: to human psychology, her quotes that she puts up and
• 22:19
  Speaker 1: then the captions, how simplified she makes everything. Yeah, and
• 22:23
  Speaker 1: it's things all of us can relate to their childhood,
• 22:27
  Speaker 1: just the inner work personality. I don't know, it's just
• 22:29
  Speaker 1: broken down so well. And I've actually interviewed her before
• 22:32
  Speaker 1: and she's such an incredible human and I've read one
• 22:35
  Speaker 1: of her books. So I just absolutely love that woman.
• 22:38
  Speaker 1: I think she's incredible.
• 22:39
  Speaker 2: Oh that's awesome, so amazing, like following accounts like that,
• 22:42
  Speaker 2: Like how much of an impact I can have in
• 22:43
  Speaker 2: your day scene? Yeah, the bits and pieces that they
• 22:45
  Speaker 2: put up each day, Yeah, so cool.
• 22:48
  Speaker 1: And the fact they're sharing it with the world for free, like,
• 22:49
  Speaker 1: I know, so cool. Amazing. Yeah.
• 22:52
  Speaker 2: So Mel Robbins, do you know Robins? I love her
• 22:55
  Speaker 2: and she always puts up such uplifting, inspiring, like amazing
• 22:59
  Speaker 2: quotes and her clips, like her reels that come up
• 23:01
  Speaker 2: on Instagram.
• 23:02
  Speaker 1: I love them.
• 23:03
  Speaker 2: I'fe through and come across her and I'm like thank you,
• 23:06
  Speaker 2: Like just those nice little pick me ups and pet
• 23:08
  Speaker 2: talks and things throughout the day. I just love following
• 23:11
  Speaker 2: her and I love seeing her face on my feed.
• 23:12
  Speaker 1: I actually don't follow on Instagram, but I listened to
• 23:14
  Speaker 1: a podcast. Yeah, I need to get her on Instagram. Yeah.
• 23:17
  Speaker 1: I love a podcast too. Yeah, I love a podcast. Great.
• 23:20
  Speaker 1: My next one is Moon memes. Oh yes, they are
• 23:23
  Speaker 1: so spot on. Steve and I send them to each
• 23:25
  Speaker 1: other whenever we see them. But like your horoscopes, your
• 23:28
  Speaker 1: daily ones, your monthly ones, Like at the moment, it
• 23:30
  Speaker 1: is crazy, how like on pointer is every time I'm
• 23:34
  Speaker 1: experiencing all the change my health. Oh like it's crazy.
• 23:39
  Speaker 1: It really whigs me out, but I absolutely love it.
• 23:41
  Speaker 1: Oh so good.
• 23:42
  Speaker 2: Whenever new ones pop up, Hey, and you prompt me
• 23:44
  Speaker 2: because you'll share them to your stories, And I'm like,
• 23:45
  Speaker 2: I'm gonna go read mine.
• 23:46
  Speaker 1: Yes, liked me to go read mine. It's so cool,
• 23:51
  Speaker 1: so good, love it. They're always on point. Steve and
• 23:53
  Speaker 1: I happen for years, Like I've followed that page for
• 23:55
  Speaker 1: Iregon five plus years. I love it. Oh so good.
• 23:58
  Speaker 1: So me next one.
• 23:59
  Speaker 2: This girl I've only been following quite recently, but I've
• 24:02
  Speaker 2: watched so much of her content on Instagram, The Queen Collected.
• 24:05
  Speaker 2: So she's all about feminine energy and.
• 24:08
  Speaker 1: Holy crap, she just talks about it so well.
• 24:10
  Speaker 2: And she also says like it's not just about feminine energy,
• 24:13
  Speaker 2: but how like to have like a masculine energy make
• 24:16
  Speaker 2: you feel more secure. There's like all the different things.
• 24:18
  Speaker 2: So there's heaps of things that are popping up, and
• 24:19
  Speaker 2: I'm like sending him to Kurtz and it's just it's
• 24:22
  Speaker 2: really awesome and like different ways of looking at things.
• 24:25
  Speaker 2: And yeah, I've just really thoroughly enjoyed her content.
• 24:28
  Speaker 1: That's awesome. I love learving about feminine energy. My next
• 24:31
  Speaker 1: one is Matthias Jay Barker. He's a trauma and relationship
• 24:37
  Speaker 1: expert and coach. I've never met him, but he seems
• 24:40
  Speaker 1: like the most beautiful man. I have to show you
• 24:43
  Speaker 1: his videos. I've never seen an I've never seen him
• 24:46
  Speaker 1: on Instagram. Oh the way he explains relationships and does
• 24:50
  Speaker 1: different dynamics and different situations and even how to like
• 24:54
  Speaker 1: respond to someone that's depressed or going through something like
• 24:57
  Speaker 1: the examples he's given. He's incredible. Oh sorry for a
• 25:00
  Speaker 1: lot of him.
• 25:01
  Speaker 2: My next one is Big Little Feelings all things little
• 25:05
  Speaker 2: kids and their emotions, and I just love it.
• 25:08
  Speaker 1: I just grow it.
• 25:09
  Speaker 2: I think there's just every parent should follow that page
• 25:11
  Speaker 2: and you'll get yeah, so many tips and treats popping
• 25:14
  Speaker 2: up all the time.
• 25:15
  Speaker 1: M hmm. I love that page as well. Yeah. My
• 25:17
  Speaker 1: last one is Quotes by Christy puts up a quote
• 25:19
  Speaker 1: and then like you swipe cross and it's the same
• 25:21
  Speaker 1: quote but in different colors. I just love all of
• 25:23
  Speaker 1: the little quotes. It just like land at the right time,
• 25:25
  Speaker 1: and I'm like, oh, it's a nice pick me up.
• 25:26
  Speaker 1: I love quotes. Yeah, they always land at the right time.
• 25:29
  Speaker 1: So she's a really good quote page. Oh so nice.
• 25:31
  Speaker 2: I love a good quote too. So I've got two more.
• 25:35
  Speaker 2: My next one is Chloe Bromage. So I love watching
• 25:39
  Speaker 2: her on Instagram. I feel like, if you are someone
• 25:41
  Speaker 2: who is lacking confidence or wanting to lean more into
• 25:43
  Speaker 2: your authentic self, you watch her reels and she just
• 25:46
  Speaker 2: makes you just feel unstoppable.
• 25:47
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 25:48
  Speaker 2: I really like her content and even her stories as well.
• 25:50
  Speaker 2: Sometimes I just like, sit there in the morning you
• 25:52
  Speaker 2: have a little listen. I'm like, oh, that was just
• 25:53
  Speaker 2: like a boost that I need.
• 25:55
  Speaker 1: Yeah. She really does not give zero fucks what anyone
• 25:57
  Speaker 1: thinks about her or what she doesna owns herself and
• 26:00
  Speaker 1: is so proud of herself and like loves herself sick
• 26:03
  Speaker 1: in such a good way. It's so good. Power of it,
• 26:05
  Speaker 1: so empowering.
• 26:06
  Speaker 2: So that's someone who's really been picking me up. And
• 26:09
  Speaker 2: then there's one more, And this one is a new one.
• 26:11
  Speaker 2: You will love this one, babe. I don't know how
• 26:14
  Speaker 2: to say the name. I think it's thy has loan
• 26:16
  Speaker 2: iell it out.
• 26:17
  Speaker 1: I think I follow him. Oh do you? I think
• 26:19
  Speaker 1: is it a girl a guy?
• 26:22
  Speaker 2: Maybe it's the guy. But basically it's all relationship stuff. Yeah,
• 26:25
  Speaker 2: but they coach you through relationship situation, so they will
• 26:29
  Speaker 2: replay it so they will go like, Okay, this is
• 26:32
  Speaker 2: how you would handle the situation if you were triggered.
• 26:35
  Speaker 2: And they do it and they go, this is how
• 26:36
  Speaker 2: you can handle the situation calmly. It is amazing. It's
• 26:39
  Speaker 2: so easy to digest and it's easy to also watch
• 26:41
  Speaker 2: and like see where maybe you've gone wrong previously and
• 26:43
  Speaker 2: be like, oh maybe when I word it, I could
• 26:45
  Speaker 2: word it that way.
• 26:46
  Speaker 1: Yeah that's cool, so cool.
• 26:47
  Speaker 2: So I'm going to spell it out because I think
• 26:49
  Speaker 2: I've butchered how I've said it. It's t h A
• 26:51
  Speaker 2: I h as l O A N and all about
• 26:55
  Speaker 2: like being regulated versus not being regulated, and like it's
• 26:59
  Speaker 2: just relationship wise. Yeah.
• 27:01
  Speaker 1: I was flicking through and I was like, this is awesome.
• 27:03
  Speaker 1: Oh my god. I saw this thing the other day.
• 27:05
  Speaker 1: It's like, next time you're in a heated discussion or
• 27:08
  Speaker 1: argument with your partner and you're feeling triggered or feeling upset,
• 27:10
  Speaker 1: or you're just feeling like, ugh, you're annoying me both,
• 27:13
  Speaker 1: put on a party hat because it instantly changed your stage. Dude,
• 27:18
  Speaker 1: like you instantly can't help but like giggle, and once
• 27:20
  Speaker 1: you drop out of having your weapons out and like
• 27:23
  Speaker 1: feeling defensive and blaming, then you can actually talk.
• 27:26
  Speaker 2: Oh my gosh, that's such a great idea. We all
• 27:29
  Speaker 2: need party hats in our side drawls in our bedroom.
• 27:32
  Speaker 1: Literally, I haven't done it yet, but I was like,
• 27:34
  Speaker 1: that's such a cool little tip. I love that.
• 27:36
  Speaker 2: It's so hilarious, like some funny glasses or something. Yeah, like, well,
• 27:40
  Speaker 2: you need to just lighten the mood.
• 27:42
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• 28:00
  Speaker 2: See you on Monday Friday,