Latest / Brooke and Jeffrey: Phone Taps / Phone Tap: Turd Track Your Dog

Transcript

Phone Tap: Turd Track Your Dog · Brooke and Jeffrey: Phone Taps

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Today, we call a woman who the other night took
• 0:02
  Speaker 1: her dog outside of her apartment.
• 0:03
  Speaker 2: To use the bathroom.
• 0:05
  Speaker 1: Sure enough, she forgot to bring a doggie bag with her,
• 0:08
  Speaker 1: so dog went number two and she just left.
• 0:14
  Speaker 2: She did.
• 0:14
  Speaker 1: She came back the next morning and it was gone.
• 0:19
  Speaker 1: She told her brother she's worried because other people in
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: the building have been fined for stuff.
• 0:24
  Speaker 2: Like this before.
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: Luckily, her brother snitched to us, and we have a
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: creative way of getting her to admit it. In your
• 0:33
  Speaker 1: phone tap right now, it's a hello, Hey, I think
• 0:42
  Speaker 1: I live in the apartment next door to yours. Okay, sorry,
• 0:47
  Speaker 1: I got your number from our landlord because you have
• 0:50
  Speaker 1: a dog, right.
• 0:52
  Speaker 3: Who wants to know, like, what is this about?
• 0:55
  Speaker 1: Well, the other night a person came by with their
• 0:58
  Speaker 1: dog and it went number two on the public lawn
• 1:02
  Speaker 1: where the signs say don't let your dog go to
• 1:04
  Speaker 1: the bathroom here.
• 1:06
  Speaker 2: You know what I'm saying about.
• 1:08
  Speaker 3: I mean, I'm familiar with the sign, yeah, and I
• 1:10
  Speaker 3: know what that's not allowed for sure?
• 1:13
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:13
  Speaker 1: Well, according to the footage, the dog looks like a
• 1:16
  Speaker 1: Chihuahua kind of a mix there.
• 1:19
  Speaker 3: I mean, there's a few tu wahas on the property.
• 1:22
  Speaker 3: So what are you suggesting?
• 1:24
  Speaker 1: Well, I showed it to other people too, and they
• 1:26
  Speaker 1: said the dog looks like yours.
• 1:28
  Speaker 3: I mean, I don't really like being called and just
• 1:31
  Speaker 3: accused of not picking up my dog. It's like that's
• 1:36
  Speaker 3: a big accusation.
• 1:37
  Speaker 1: And sure, I hear you not answering the question. We
• 1:41
  Speaker 1: could just get back to that was that your dog?
• 1:44
  Speaker 3: I mean, until I see the video, I'm not going
• 1:47
  Speaker 3: to say that it was my dog or not, because I.
• 1:49
  Speaker 1: Know, like if it wasn't your dog, you would probably
• 1:52
  Speaker 1: just say no, that wasn't my dog.
• 1:55
  Speaker 3: I mean, I'm pretty sure I said that. I'm not
• 1:57
  Speaker 3: gonna now.
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: You gave me like a very long, long winded explanation
• 2:01
  Speaker 1: for why you weren't willing to commit yes or no
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: until you see the footage.
• 2:05
  Speaker 2: And I mean that's a lot, right.
• 2:08
  Speaker 3: Are we done with this conversation?
• 2:11
  Speaker 1: Well, I guess almost. I mean, let me just tell
• 2:13
  Speaker 1: you this. I do have a friend of mine who
• 2:16
  Speaker 1: works over at turd Track.
• 2:18
  Speaker 2: Where turd Track.
• 2:21
  Speaker 1: It's a database that matches pet's poop to the animal that.
• 2:24
  Speaker 2: It came from. I stop it. I'm serious. It's a
• 2:27
  Speaker 2: real thing.
• 2:29
  Speaker 1: Okay, So look, no big deal, you know, I'm just
• 2:31
  Speaker 1: gonna pop by your place a little bit later and
• 2:33
  Speaker 1: have your dog poop into a bowl for me.
• 2:36
  Speaker 3: You're gonna what kind of a mean? I just goes
• 2:39
  Speaker 3: to somebody's house and picks up their dogs poop.
• 2:42
  Speaker 1: No, I'm not doing it for me. It's for turd track.
• 2:45
  Speaker 1: I mean, how else am I going to get his
• 2:46
  Speaker 1: digestive footprint for forensic analysis?
• 2:49
  Speaker 3: This is out of absolutely not okay.
• 2:52
  Speaker 2: So you're saying no to turd.
• 2:54
  Speaker 3: Track, that's right, absolutely not no.
• 2:57
  Speaker 2: To pooping in a bowl, No.
• 2:58
  Speaker 3: To pooping in a exactly what I said. Thank you?
• 3:02
  Speaker 2: Fine, Well, honestly, it's too bad. It is too bad.
• 3:06
  Speaker 3: It's too bad that you've wasted all of my time
• 3:08
  Speaker 3: right now.
• 3:09
  Speaker 2: No, that's not what I ellen. That's not what I meant.
• 3:11
  Speaker 1: It's just it's too bad because the excrement that I
• 3:13
  Speaker 1: found on the lawn is actually top quality. What and
• 3:17
  Speaker 1: I was hoping to make your dog an offer if
• 3:20
  Speaker 1: it did.
• 3:21
  Speaker 2: Belong to him.
• 3:21
  Speaker 3: What is going? What? Oh?
• 3:24
  Speaker 1: My god?
• 3:24
  Speaker 2: Ill to tell you.
• 3:26
  Speaker 1: I partner with a company, it's called Eco Gold Fertilizer,
• 3:29
  Speaker 1: and we look all over the place for the top
• 3:32
  Speaker 1: quality excrement and that night, the droppings that were left
• 3:36
  Speaker 1: on the lawn. It was like pristine chef's kiss quality stuff.
• 3:44
  Speaker 1: What are you talking about?
• 3:46
  Speaker 3: I thought you were calling because I was in trouble
• 3:50
  Speaker 3: and I like to see the footage of my dog
• 3:53
  Speaker 3: because it could be my dog.
• 3:54
  Speaker 2: What kind of ah? Oh, now it might be your dog.
• 3:58
  Speaker 3: You're saying, my dog's fool could be worth an lout
• 4:00
  Speaker 3: of money and my dog is in excellent shape. Oh
• 4:04
  Speaker 3: it's so what like, what's the offer?
• 4:07
  Speaker 1: I can't give you like an official number at this
• 4:09
  Speaker 1: point because we haven't had a match yet.
• 4:12
  Speaker 2: We'd have to go back to turn track.
• 4:14
  Speaker 3: Oh my god.
• 4:15
  Speaker 1: Then with the turn track, if it did come back
• 4:17
  Speaker 1: as a match for your dog, you could be making
• 4:20
  Speaker 1: upwards of ten grand a month.
• 4:24
  Speaker 3: Oh my god.
• 4:24
  Speaker 2: All right, listen, listen, listen, listen.
• 4:26
  Speaker 3: What let's just let's save the time. I thought I
• 4:30
  Speaker 3: was in trouble. It was me. It was me a
• 4:33
  Speaker 3: million percent. That is my dog. Nugget.
• 4:37
  Speaker 1: That is nugget, nugg Ou nuggets, Nuggets nugget.
• 4:43
  Speaker 3: Oh dude, it's perfect nuggets. I feel so bad. I
• 4:48
  Speaker 3: had I left my bags.
• 4:49
  Speaker 2: At home bars.
• 4:50
  Speaker 3: I was gonna pick it up, like I wasn't just
• 4:52
  Speaker 3: gonna leave it there like, but by the time I
• 4:54
  Speaker 3: went to pick it.
• 4:54
  Speaker 2: Up, it was gone.
• 4:55
  Speaker 3: They sign you here, you get in trouble.
• 4:58
  Speaker 2: That's a great story. Well put it on the back
• 5:00
  Speaker 2: of the bag.
• 5:01
  Speaker 3: Where do okay, where do I sign? How do we
• 5:03
  Speaker 3: get the how do we get this going to me?
• 5:06
  Speaker 1: So I already actually sent a copy of the contract
• 5:09
  Speaker 1: to your brother John.
• 5:12
  Speaker 2: Wait, he'll probably give that to you after we're done
• 5:15
  Speaker 2: doing this prank. Phone call on. Yes, Oh my god,
• 5:20
  Speaker 2: you're actually on the radio right now. My name is
• 5:25
  Speaker 2: jeff from brook and Jeffrey in the Morning. John sets
• 5:27
  Speaker 2: you up for a phone tap.
• 5:28
  Speaker 3: Oh my god, listen, my head was sitting.
• 5:33
  Speaker 2: I didn't know if I was in drum.
• 5:34
  Speaker 3: I was like, oh my god, I'm gotta be rich.
• 5:36
  Speaker 3: I can't wait to pay off these credit cards.
• 5:39
  Speaker 1: So wait, if I stop by your apartment later, is
• 5:41
  Speaker 1: your dog good to go in a bowl?
• 5:42
  Speaker 3: Are you kidding me? For ten thousand dollars, you can
• 5:44
  Speaker 3: come over and he poop in a hat.
• 5:48
  Speaker 1: Wake Up.
• 5:48
  Speaker 2: Every morning was phone taps weekday mornings on the twenties
• 5:52
  Speaker 2: Brooking Jeffrey in the Morning