Latest / Bomb Life / Creating an Environment for Success: Fitness Beyond Motivation with Melissa Vogel |314

Transcript

Creating an Environment for Success: Fitness Beyond Motivation with Melissa Vogel |314 · Bomb Life

• 0:00
  [SPEAKER_00]: We can convince ourselves that I'll start one day.
• 0:03
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'll start next year.
• 0:04
  [SPEAKER_00]: Oh, I deserve this.
• 0:06
  [SPEAKER_00]: And this is why you deserve this.
• 0:08
  [SPEAKER_00]: We can convince ourselves that, oh, I need to have this to shut my brain off.
• 0:12
  [SPEAKER_00]: I have to take this gummy because this is the only way I'm going to get sleep.
• 0:16
  [SPEAKER_00]: And this is the only way that I'm going to be able to just sit and relax and like be chill.
• 0:19
  [SPEAKER_00]: you do that over and over and over again and you keep telling yourself and you keep convincing yourself of that, that is going to become reality.
• 0:27
  [SPEAKER_00]: But in the beginning and right now it's a lie, you don't need that, you just like that and it helps you get there, but there are ways to get to your goal without those things and to knock off the line.
• 0:51
  [SPEAKER_00]: Welcome to the Bond Life Podcast where fitness, vines, and real talk collide.
• 0:56
  [SPEAKER_00]: This is it just about workouts.
• 0:57
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's about transforming your body, mind, and life.
• 1:00
  [SPEAKER_00]: Get ready for unfiltered conversations, expert advice, and the motivation you need to level up in every way.
• 1:19
  [SPEAKER_00]: Hey everyone, welcome to the bomb life podcast.
• 1:22
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'm Melissa Vogel your host.
• 1:23
  [SPEAKER_00]: Welcome to the show.
• 1:25
  [SPEAKER_00]: If you're returning listener, welcome back.
• 1:27
  [SPEAKER_00]: Oh, it's going to be a good one.
• 1:29
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'm going to give it to you straight today because you just get me today's a solo episode.
• 1:33
  [SPEAKER_00]: I love doing solo ones.
• 1:34
  [SPEAKER_00]: You guys ask for of all the time and I'm just like it's hard.
• 1:39
  [SPEAKER_00]: It is hard to do a solo episode.
• 1:41
  [SPEAKER_00]: It is not the easiest thing in the world because you don't get like feedback.
• 1:45
  [SPEAKER_00]: you know, it's just kind of you talking.
• 1:48
  [SPEAKER_00]: And I have ideas.
• 1:49
  [SPEAKER_00]: I know what I want to say, but like to not bounce them off of anyone or be like, what do you think about this?
• 1:53
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's a challenge, but I don't know.
• 1:55
  [SPEAKER_00]: You guys love them.
• 1:56
  [SPEAKER_00]: So here I am.
• 1:57
  [SPEAKER_00]: And if you're a brand new listener, welcome.
• 1:59
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'm so glad that you found this episode.
• 2:02
  [SPEAKER_00]: Maybe someone passed it on to you.
• 2:04
  [SPEAKER_00]: Maybe you just doubled upon in social media.
• 2:06
  [SPEAKER_00]: Whatever the case, I'm really glad that you're here because the show is not possible without you guys.
• 2:11
  [SPEAKER_00]: Couple housekeeping things.
• 2:12
  [SPEAKER_00]: Oh, I was going to say this
• 2:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: rate and review this podcast.
• 2:15
  [SPEAKER_00]: Five stars if you feel appropriate.
• 2:17
  [SPEAKER_00]: Leave a review on all platforms.
• 2:19
  [SPEAKER_00]: You can do it like on Spotify or iTunes or whatever, but I say this all the time.
• 2:23
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's like leaving me a huge tip in the tip chart.
• 2:27
  [SPEAKER_00]: The ratings and review does just wonders for the show.
• 2:30
  [SPEAKER_00]: So like I said today is going to be a solo episode and I have been having so many hard conversations lately with my clients, good conversations, but they are difficult, they truly are difficult and it's been really interesting to go through.
• 2:47
  [SPEAKER_00]: all of the holidays, vacations, shifts with kids, schedules.
• 2:53
  [SPEAKER_00]: And, you know, it's always interesting to go through seasons of life with people.
• 2:57
  [SPEAKER_00]: And that's what we do through coaching.
• 2:59
  [SPEAKER_00]: And then, you know, through my program, busy department stuff.
• 3:01
  [SPEAKER_00]: But there's so many lessons that people learn.
• 3:06
  [SPEAKER_00]: And I'm like, man, this would make for a good episode.
• 3:08
  [SPEAKER_00]: Man, this is a lesson that I wish I could duplicate and teach.
• 3:12
  [SPEAKER_00]: You know, thousands of other people, this lesson, this is one person and I'm so grateful to have the platform of the podcast to be able to do that because that's kind of what I do.
• 3:21
  [SPEAKER_00]: I kind of take like real life experiences and coaching and my clients failures and wins and my own personal stuff too.
• 3:29
  [SPEAKER_00]: And then I can put it in a episode and put it out there and I'm like, hey, you guys, this is what I learned like take it use it and I've said this before on I think I've said this recently on the last several episodes that I've done is that you just you never know what messages going to hit you.
• 3:45
  [SPEAKER_00]: differently and then change your life.
• 3:48
  [SPEAKER_00]: You never know what book you're going to read.
• 3:49
  [SPEAKER_00]: You never know what person you hear speak.
• 3:51
  [SPEAKER_00]: Sometimes you never even know what kind of a real you're going to see and you're like you never forget that example before I dive into everything.
• 4:01
  [SPEAKER_00]: I have this sticky note on my it's sitting on my bulletin board in front of me and it says all as well everything is working
• 4:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: only good will come from and I am safe.
• 4:16
  [SPEAKER_00]: It got me through some really, really dark moments.
• 4:20
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'm going to say it again, all as well, everything is working out for my highest good and all the situation, only good will come and I am safe.
• 4:27
  [SPEAKER_00]: Like every single line of that spoke to me during some of my darkest moments.
• 4:32
  [SPEAKER_00]: and I saw that like on social media or something and I wrote it down really quick and I have it like right in front of me and it brings so much calm and peace to me.
• 4:42
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's not even funny.
• 4:44
  [SPEAKER_00]: I have another one too.
• 4:44
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'm going to share this.
• 4:45
  [SPEAKER_00]: This totally is on topic.
• 4:46
  [SPEAKER_00]: You guys this is not what I want to dive into but I always trust for my squirrel brain goes into.
• 4:51
  [SPEAKER_00]: I have another one over here on my wall.
• 4:53
  [SPEAKER_00]: And again, I saw this somewhere just on social media or whatever, and it spoke to me.
• 4:58
  [SPEAKER_00]: And that's, I'm just sharing it because you never know what's going to speak to you.
• 5:01
  [SPEAKER_00]: So maybe mine are going to speak to you too.
• 5:04
  [SPEAKER_00]: It says, live by three simple rules.
• 5:07
  [SPEAKER_00]: one, love needs action.
• 5:09
  [SPEAKER_00]: Two, trust needs proof.
• 5:12
  [SPEAKER_00]: And three, sorry needs change.
• 5:15
  [SPEAKER_00]: That has guided me through being like a single woman.
• 5:19
  [SPEAKER_00]: It has guided me in relationships.
• 5:21
  [SPEAKER_00]: That sticky know it fades because it gets in the sun and I just keep rewriting it.
• 5:26
  [SPEAKER_00]: But that post in the first one that I said, it just changed me.
• 5:31
  [SPEAKER_00]: And this is one of the reasons why I'm constantly
• 5:34
  [SPEAKER_00]: kind of, I kind of talk about the same things, but just in different ways.
• 5:39
  [SPEAKER_00]: And you never know what time you're going to hear a message or in a different way, and it's literally going to change your life.
• 5:47
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'm not even joking.
• 5:48
  [SPEAKER_00]: I've had this happen to me several times.
• 5:51
  [SPEAKER_00]: And I want you guys to remember, too, that, oh, and if you're watching me live right now, I have surf in here with me.
• 5:59
  [SPEAKER_00]: He just had to come into the,
• 6:00
  [SPEAKER_00]: They're recording studio today.
• 6:02
  [SPEAKER_00]: So if you guys get to see this, you could see Mr. Surf in the background.
• 6:05
  [SPEAKER_00]: He'll just wander around and like jump up up on my lap and say hi.
• 6:08
  [SPEAKER_00]: So if you guys see if I had to say that.
• 6:10
  [SPEAKER_00]: If you're just listening, sir, you don't get to see surf.
• 6:12
  [SPEAKER_00]: Maybe you'll see a cut of a month social media.
• 6:14
  [SPEAKER_00]: But you have to hear a message like 800 times before even sticks into your brain and that you like fully comprehend it and then remember it and then put it into action.
• 6:24
  [SPEAKER_00]: So remember that.
• 6:26
  [SPEAKER_00]: Today I wanted to talk about motivation.
• 6:28
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay, duh, like this is nothing new, right?
• 6:31
  [SPEAKER_00]: We talk about motivation all the time.
• 6:33
  [SPEAKER_00]: And we also talk about how you can't rely on motivation.
• 6:36
  [SPEAKER_00]: It is going to come.
• 6:38
  [SPEAKER_00]: It is going to go.
• 6:39
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's going to make you feel amazing.
• 6:41
  [SPEAKER_00]: And then when it's not there, it's going to make you feel like shit.
• 6:43
  [SPEAKER_00]: And I want to point out how important it is.
• 6:46
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yes, to show up and do things when the motivation isn't there, right?
• 6:50
  [SPEAKER_00]: Like that's super important.
• 6:52
  [SPEAKER_00]: But also, I want you to realize all of the things that you can do and start to put into practice to change yourself to be able to show up when the motivation isn't there.
• 7:02
  [SPEAKER_00]: And one of the key factors and one of the key points to getting your ass up and getting out the door when you don't have the motivation is your environment.
• 7:12
  [SPEAKER_00]: Again, not a new topic we've talked about this before.
• 7:14
  [SPEAKER_00]: You've heard me say things like this before.
• 7:17
  [SPEAKER_00]: But that environment and who you surround yourself with, it is going to make a break you.
• 7:23
  [SPEAKER_00]: It truly will.
• 7:24
  [SPEAKER_00]: There are very, very few people that you will find in this space that are doing amazing that don't have some type of team or environment or people around them.
• 7:36
  [SPEAKER_00]: It would be really, really shocking if you found someone that looked,
• 7:41
  [SPEAKER_00]: Like a certain way and you're like, wow, day on, like, what do you do?
• 7:45
  [SPEAKER_00]: And you talk to them, and they don't have maybe a gym partner or a gym community that they go to or even a coach or have had a coach in the past or have friends that share that.
• 7:54
  [SPEAKER_00]: I don't know if it'll look different for everyone.
• 7:56
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's very rare to find like a lone wolf wolf in this situation of wolf.
• 8:01
  [SPEAKER_00]: You know what I'm saying?
• 8:02
  [SPEAKER_00]: I know some people look at me and they think that I am that person and I'm like, oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, because I use my program and my group as a client.
• 8:10
  [SPEAKER_00]: And even though I'm leading people, I'm still in that environment.
• 8:14
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'm still talking about what are you eating today?
• 8:16
  [SPEAKER_00]: What are your sets and wraps like get the fuck up?
• 8:19
  [SPEAKER_00]: Like, come on, let's go.
• 8:20
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'm in that environment.
• 8:21
  [SPEAKER_00]: Like, yeah, I'm leading it, but I'm still in it.
• 8:24
  [SPEAKER_00]: I don't go to the gym and work out with people unless I'm like really with my kids.
• 8:28
  [SPEAKER_00]: I haven't worked out with a partner in a really long time.
• 8:30
  [SPEAKER_00]: And I don't do group classes or anything like that anymore.
• 8:33
  [SPEAKER_00]: So from the outside looking in, it would look like, oh, no, Melissa does it on her own.
• 8:37
  [SPEAKER_00]: She's here a lot, you know, by herself or she just has her kids.
• 8:40
  [SPEAKER_00]: And it's not true.
• 8:41
  [SPEAKER_00]: I have a whole community and it's that environment that I want you guys to really start taking a look at today.
• 8:47
  [SPEAKER_00]: And really think about this of like, what is your team?
• 8:50
  [SPEAKER_00]: What does your space look like?
• 8:53
  [SPEAKER_00]: Because if you have this in place, if you get this in place, and it doesn't matter if this is for
• 8:58
  [SPEAKER_00]: a few weeks, a few, I mean, obviously you don't want it just for a few weeks, but it doesn't matter if it's for months long or years long or honestly for the rest of your life, like who's to judge, right, and here's where we always get stuck.
• 9:12
  [SPEAKER_00]: Like this is like super common for people.
• 9:14
  [SPEAKER_00]: So here's the scene that I see all the time.
• 9:17
  [SPEAKER_00]: people show up and they start crushing it.
• 9:19
  [SPEAKER_00]: You know, usually, obviously around New Year's time is very common time.
• 9:24
  [SPEAKER_00]: Around New Year's time, people are crushing it.
• 9:26
  [SPEAKER_00]: They get really excited.
• 9:27
  [SPEAKER_00]: We get new work out gear.
• 9:28
  [SPEAKER_00]: A new gym opens up.
• 9:30
  [SPEAKER_00]: Oh my god.
• 9:30
  [SPEAKER_00]: We had a new gym open up last, I think they were opened for a year now, last January.
• 9:36
  [SPEAKER_00]: you wouldn't believe the rush in the crowd and all those people and a guarantee if we went back and could like mark the humans that were there and like color coded people, all the people that were there those first three months of the granite opening, we went to the system and looked, they probably haven't been there since.
• 9:52
  [SPEAKER_00]: But we do this.
• 9:53
  [SPEAKER_00]: You know, we get excited about things.
• 9:55
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's endorphins.
• 9:57
  [SPEAKER_00]: You know, we get an adrenaline hit by starting something new.
• 10:00
  [SPEAKER_00]: I talked about this another in another podcast or maybe it was on the webinar that I did about how actually stopping like doing something and stopping and then starting over again gives us.
• 10:11
  [SPEAKER_00]: And adrenaline rush, it's crazy.
• 10:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: And then you get kind of hooked on that, the like, oh, the new beginning.
• 10:17
  [SPEAKER_00]: And it plays into why people start and stop.
• 10:20
  [SPEAKER_00]: Like, how crazy is that?
• 10:21
  [SPEAKER_00]: Like, you actually like the feel good feelings of failing and then starting again.
• 10:26
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, hold the podcast.
• 10:27
  [SPEAKER_00]: But you know, you're crushing it.
• 10:29
  [SPEAKER_00]: You're in the gym.
• 10:29
  [SPEAKER_00]: You're tracking.
• 10:30
  [SPEAKER_00]: You feel super unstoppable.
• 10:32
  [SPEAKER_00]: And this can last for a long time.
• 10:34
  [SPEAKER_00]: But truly can.
• 10:34
  [SPEAKER_00]: And I would say even like a week or a month is a long time, you know, to feel this good about things.
• 10:40
  [SPEAKER_00]: And then you have to travel, like maybe you go on vacation, you know, traveling for work or you go on vacation, coming back from vacation and feeling just like I just don't have that motivation before I went on vacation because looking good for your vacation was your motivation, right, that got you going because I'm going to be in a beginning a few weeks or whatever and then you come back and it's not there and that's what you were relying on this happens a lot.
• 11:09
  [SPEAKER_00]: like a lot and that's why I tell people one of the worst things that you could do is get in shape for like a wedding of a patient, a special trip, a special like date.
• 11:19
  [SPEAKER_00]: Like yes, have that be part of what lights a fire under your ass, but my God do not make that like what you're training for.
• 11:28
  [SPEAKER_00]: It will come back and bite you in the ass.
• 11:30
  [SPEAKER_00]: Because then when the travel's done or the vacation's done, it just gets in the way, what about like when work gets super insane, right?
• 11:36
  [SPEAKER_00]: Or your kids get sick, or you get sick, you're exhausted, you're living off of like a protein bar and freaking coke, you know, the drink.
• 11:44
  [SPEAKER_00]: And then suddenly like you're off track, what happens?
• 11:48
  [SPEAKER_00]: That motivation completely leaves you and I know many of you listening to this can relate.
• 11:52
  [SPEAKER_00]: I can relate.
• 11:53
  [SPEAKER_00]: I have to regroup and regain my motivation all the time, all the time.
• 11:59
  [SPEAKER_00]: And this has been happening really recently.
• 12:01
  [SPEAKER_00]: This is one thing that I want to talk about was sickness.
• 12:05
  [SPEAKER_00]: I have clients that had been really sick over the last few weeks.
• 12:10
  [SPEAKER_00]: Some of them are newer clients, some of them they've been with me for a while.
• 12:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: And I can see the difference.
• 12:18
  [SPEAKER_00]: And it has been like fighting a toddler to get into a car seat.
• 12:22
  [SPEAKER_00]: If you're a father toddler to get into a car seat and you got to literally push them down because they're like a board and bridging their body and they don't want to get in and you're like trying to buckle the chest strap and the bottom strap, that's what it's like for me, sometimes with new clients.
• 12:35
  [SPEAKER_00]: And they get sick and then I'm like, okay, come on, let's go.
• 12:38
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's time to get back at it.
• 12:39
  [SPEAKER_00]: And they're like, yeah, but I still know, feel good.
• 12:41
  [SPEAKER_00]: Boom, bored in the car seat.
• 12:42
  [SPEAKER_00]: You know, they're like, I just, I don't have an appetite.
• 12:45
  [SPEAKER_00]: And if, and it's not that they're lying, I believe them.
• 12:48
  [SPEAKER_00]: Like, I totally live, I've been there.
• 12:50
  [SPEAKER_00]: But come on now, you know, if you continue to do this and you just don't eat, you're never going to feel better.
• 12:56
  [SPEAKER_00]: You're never going to have enough fuel in your tank.
• 12:58
  [SPEAKER_00]: And it's just like it's like pulling teeth and if they didn't have a coach in place, if they didn't have this success and many of you can relate to this, like what the fuck would have happened?
• 13:08
  [SPEAKER_00]: Like really think about that.
• 13:09
  [SPEAKER_00]: And they're like, oh, I would I wouldn't have shown up.
• 13:11
  [SPEAKER_00]: I probably would have waited till the summer or like until like summer got close again.
• 13:14
  [SPEAKER_00]: And then I would have gotten worried because I would have had extra weight on and like sometimes coming and shorts and bathing suits and all of that.
• 13:21
  [SPEAKER_00]: And they're like, then I would
• 13:23
  [SPEAKER_00]: and they don't have the environment in place and they no longer have the motivation because it was just knocked right out by an illness.
• 13:32
  [SPEAKER_00]: And it's really hard when your immune system has been compromised when your body has gone through hell, whether that was like the whole sore throat thing in the chest, you can't breathe, maybe you were vomiting, and your body's been through the wringer.
• 13:45
  [SPEAKER_00]: It takes everything in you to get back on your feet.
• 13:47
  [SPEAKER_00]: And most people aren't taking even the right supplements
• 13:51
  [SPEAKER_00]: When people get sick, they usually stop taking it.
• 13:53
  [SPEAKER_00]: And I'm always like, hey, are you on your spirulina?
• 13:55
  [SPEAKER_00]: Are you on your Corella?
• 13:56
  [SPEAKER_00]: Are you using infrared light?
• 13:58
  [SPEAKER_00]: And I'm like, they're like, push them.
• 13:59
  [SPEAKER_00]: But my whole point is that, if you don't have someone in your corner and that motivation is gone and everything is rocked by life events, what happens?
• 14:08
  [SPEAKER_00]: And I want you to remember this.
• 14:09
  [SPEAKER_00]: I want you to write this down.
• 14:11
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's not that you lost motivation, it's that you were relying on something that was never designed to carry you.
• 14:18
  [SPEAKER_00]: Think about that.
• 14:20
  [SPEAKER_00]: You were relying on something that was never, ever meant to carry you.
• 14:25
  [SPEAKER_00]: That vacation was never meant to carry you.
• 14:28
  [SPEAKER_00]: Those classes that you sign up was never meant to carry you.
• 14:31
  [SPEAKER_00]: That app.
• 14:32
  [SPEAKER_00]: that you rely on that you like just get workouts from, you know, and you just kind of like log in and put on your from ground and you follow it, whatever that app isn't calling for you when you don't show up.
• 14:44
  [SPEAKER_00]: And you were relying on that to like get through the workouts, well, what happens when you I mean, I can go to a whole other discussion about this, but what happens when you start to plateau what happens when you're like, I don't want to do it and that app isn't going to be like, come on, let's go.
• 14:57
  [SPEAKER_00]: what happens if you were going to the gym with someone else, and they're not going anymore, and you were like, I was really counting on them to show up, but now they're not.
• 15:06
  [SPEAKER_00]: You were relying on something that was designed to not carry you.
• 15:10
  [SPEAKER_00]: You want to make sure you have things in place in an environment in place that is designed to carry you when you don't show up, and most people are missing that.
• 15:21
  [SPEAKER_00]: And we have to remember, too, that motivation, it's emotional.
• 15:26
  [SPEAKER_00]: And how many times, and that's kind of scary, but really think about it.
• 15:30
  [SPEAKER_00]: Like, if we're being brutally honest with ourselves, motivation is completely based on emotions.
• 15:36
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's all emotions.
• 15:38
  [SPEAKER_00]: And one of the things that I'm even constantly telling my kids is like, don't let your emotions guide you, which I have to laugh saying this because I'm guided by my emotions all the time.
• 15:47
  [SPEAKER_00]: There are times where I am just spit and fire, and I'm like, I'm speaking completely from emotion right now.
• 15:51
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'm fully aware of that.
• 15:52
  [SPEAKER_00]: And I need to take a step back and calm down.
• 15:54
  [SPEAKER_00]: and it's taken me a long time to have that growth to realize and stop what I'm in that moment of like this is purely emotion striving me right now.
• 16:02
  [SPEAKER_00]: Emotions are completely driving me right now.
• 16:04
  [SPEAKER_00]: I am all up in my feelings and this is making me behave and act a certain way.
• 16:09
  [SPEAKER_00]: How many of you are guilty of that?
• 16:11
  [SPEAKER_00]: And when you look at it with motivation, if motivation is purely emotional and we're letting that drive us to the gym,
• 16:17
  [SPEAKER_00]: mother, fucking, shit, or in trouble.
• 16:21
  [SPEAKER_00]: How much do your emotions when you're all up in your feelings get you in a trouble in real life?
• 16:25
  [SPEAKER_00]: We say things we don't mean, we eat things that we know we shouldn't.
• 16:29
  [SPEAKER_00]: We don't show up, we don't follow the timeline and the schedule that we had set for ourselves.
• 16:33
  [SPEAKER_00]: We miss things, we skip things all because of emotions.
• 16:37
  [SPEAKER_00]: And we can't, we can't turn those off, we're human, and who me and other people listening, we're women.
• 16:43
  [SPEAKER_00]: We are very emotional creatures, even more than men.
• 16:46
  [SPEAKER_00]: But men, you guys get all up in your feelings, too.
• 16:48
  [SPEAKER_00]: And that drives you.
• 16:49
  [SPEAKER_00]: And that causes you to act and behave a certain way as well.
• 16:54
  [SPEAKER_00]: Well, shit, if we're all talking about this right now and we're going, this is what I rely on to get me into the gym.
• 17:00
  [SPEAKER_00]: No wonder I'm not moving forward.
• 17:03
  [SPEAKER_00]: No wonder.
• 17:05
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's completely reactive.
• 17:07
  [SPEAKER_00]: And here's another thing.
• 17:09
  [SPEAKER_00]: Like it spikes.
• 17:11
  [SPEAKER_00]: And then we're really in trouble because you just got a real big shot of some endorphins.
• 17:15
  [SPEAKER_00]: And it spikes when you feel like inspired.
• 17:17
  [SPEAKER_00]: And even if you're mad or like you go through a breakup, you're like, yeah, fuck that guy.
• 17:21
  [SPEAKER_00]: And like you get motivated.
• 17:23
  [SPEAKER_00]: You know, you hear a podcast.
• 17:24
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's a Monday.
• 17:25
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's a new year.
• 17:26
  [SPEAKER_00]: it's reactive and then it spikes.
• 17:29
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's amazing when it's there, but it's unreliable.
• 17:33
  [SPEAKER_00]: And I want you to remember this because, you know, we can talk about this and like, hey, motivation, don't rely on it.
• 17:39
  [SPEAKER_00]: I don't know, but like put it in a real world situations.
• 17:43
  [SPEAKER_00]: Hey, Bob and my fam, I have a question for you.
• 17:46
  [SPEAKER_00]: Are you the kind of person who crushes it at work?
• 17:48
  [SPEAKER_00]: Shows up for your family, checks off every to-do list.
• 17:51
  [SPEAKER_00]: But when it comes to your fitness, your energy and your confidence, it feels like something's missing.
• 17:55
  [SPEAKER_00]: You might be doing the workouts listening to all the right podcasts.
• 17:58
  [SPEAKER_00]: I mean, you are listening to this one.
• 17:59
  [SPEAKER_00]: but deep down you know you're just kind of going through the motions and you're done playing small in this area of life.
• 18:04
  [SPEAKER_00]: That's exactly why I created FitMine Coaching.
• 18:07
  [SPEAKER_00]: My private one-on-one program for high-achieving women and men who are ready to level up.
• 18:12
  [SPEAKER_00]: This isn't just another fitness plan.
• 18:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: This is about building the body and the mindset to match the life you're working so damn hard for.
• 18:18
  [SPEAKER_00]: And because success in business means nothing if you're hiding in hoodies avoiding mirrors or dragging through your day with your energy, or showing up on Zoom meetings feeling good from the chest up, but praying no one ever sees what's going on below the screen.
• 18:31
  [SPEAKER_00]: We're talking about fat loss, muscle building, and real confidence that bleeds into every area of your life.
• 18:36
  [SPEAKER_00]: Your boredom, your bedroom, and your parenting.
• 18:38
  [SPEAKER_00]: You want it all?
• 18:39
  [SPEAKER_00]: Good.
• 18:39
  [SPEAKER_00]: You should have it all.
• 18:41
  [SPEAKER_00]: Let's go.
• 18:42
  [SPEAKER_00]: Click the link in the show notes and book your free call with me today.
• 18:48
  [SPEAKER_00]: You're ready for more, and I'm ready to show you how back to the show.
• 18:52
  [SPEAKER_00]: Can you build a business fully on motivation?
• 18:56
  [SPEAKER_00]: How, no.
• 18:58
  [SPEAKER_00]: Can you build a marriage or a relationship just on motivation?
• 19:03
  [SPEAKER_00]: No, could you imagine what your marriage or your relationship would look like if you were only in that marriage when you felt motivated?
• 19:11
  [SPEAKER_00]: And then when you didn't feel motivated, you were looking up with someone else.
• 19:17
  [SPEAKER_00]: Motivation does not work in any other situation of our life, but we think that we can build a body and our fitness based off of it, right?
• 19:26
  [SPEAKER_00]: It blows my mind.
• 19:28
  [SPEAKER_00]: Now, we're talking about all of this motivation, right?
• 19:32
  [SPEAKER_00]: You want to become the person and it is totally possible to do this,
• 19:41
  [SPEAKER_00]: and shows up when the motivation isn't there, but you have to practice this.
• 19:47
  [SPEAKER_00]: It will not happen overnight.
• 19:48
  [SPEAKER_00]: I just told my daughter this like yesterday and I told her I was like, look, I want you prepared for the real world and right now is the time to practice and right now is the time to practice
• 19:58
  [SPEAKER_00]: right now is the time to do hard things in a quote unquote safe environment.
• 20:03
  [SPEAKER_00]: So you're ready.
• 20:04
  [SPEAKER_00]: I don't know why you think you're going to just become this magical person that can take on the world or stand up for herself or do A, B, and C when you have no practice doing it.
• 20:14
  [SPEAKER_00]: And the way to get practice to be able to do it on your own is your environment.
• 20:21
  [SPEAKER_00]: I can't stress enough.
• 20:25
  [SPEAKER_00]: how much motivation is not there and being able to do all the things is connected to your environment.
• 20:32
  [SPEAKER_00]: Like if you have been looking for like the secret sauce like how do I do this?
• 20:36
  [SPEAKER_00]: How do I make gains?
• 20:37
  [SPEAKER_00]: How do I hit my goals?
• 20:38
  [SPEAKER_00]: It is who you have around you.
• 20:41
  [SPEAKER_00]: It is who you have around you.
• 20:43
  [SPEAKER_00]: It is your environment.
• 20:44
  [SPEAKER_00]: It is where you're going.
• 20:45
  [SPEAKER_00]: It is the people that you're interacting with.
• 20:48
  [SPEAKER_00]: that is what's going to set you up to show up and practice.
• 20:51
  [SPEAKER_00]: And then one day, maybe you don't need the environment as much.
• 20:56
  [SPEAKER_00]: Maybe, or you realize like, no, I need some form of this in my life at least for the next one, two, three years.
• 21:04
  [SPEAKER_00]: There is no shame in that at all.
• 21:06
  [SPEAKER_00]: Like, really make sure that that's clear to yourself.
• 21:09
  [SPEAKER_00]: we like to have a lot of shame and guilt, especially women.
• 21:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: And they're like, but I should be able to do this on my own.
• 21:16
  [SPEAKER_00]: Oh yeah, why?
• 21:17
  [SPEAKER_00]: Does your business run on its own?
• 21:20
  [SPEAKER_00]: Think about the company that you work for.
• 21:22
  [SPEAKER_00]: Does that go on its own?
• 21:24
  [SPEAKER_00]: No, you got CEOs, global CEOs, secretaries, assistants, managers, clients, the environment is what keeps that business going and every single piece is necessary.
• 21:36
  [SPEAKER_00]: But we don't go, oh, well, that business should be operating completely on its own right now.
• 21:40
  [SPEAKER_00]: What?
• 21:41
  [SPEAKER_00]: No.
• 21:42
  [SPEAKER_00]: Your body is the same exact way.
• 21:45
  [SPEAKER_00]: Don't treat it any different.
• 21:47
  [SPEAKER_00]: There is no reason that you should be able to just do this on your own.
• 21:49
  [SPEAKER_00]: And you guys, I've said this before, we are fighting an environment that doesn't set us up for success.
• 21:54
  [SPEAKER_00]: We are fighting an environment that is, we just live in this chemical soup all day, every day, what we breathe, the cars that we drive, the EMFs that we're exposed to, the toxins in our food.
• 22:07
  [SPEAKER_00]: I mean, we can just go on and on and all of those things are set of, they're not helping us.
• 22:12
  [SPEAKER_00]: We are going against and losing a, losing the battle in some ways and the only way to win or have any chance of success is to fight for yourself.
• 22:22
  [SPEAKER_00]: and you need a team to do that.
• 22:25
  [SPEAKER_00]: I was at Vegas this weekend and I don't know if you saw my story or not, many of you follow follow me on social media and I had posted, I went to the gym, I got up on Friday.
• 22:35
  [SPEAKER_00]: I think I don't know Friday or Saturday and I went to the gym and there was like one person in there on the treadmill and then they left and I was literally in the gym by myself for like an hour, which is glorious, like don't get me wrong.
• 22:48
  [SPEAKER_00]: I was totally stoked.
• 22:50
  [SPEAKER_00]: But it was crazy just thinking about how many people were in this hotel right now with me just thousands of people and I'm the only one in the gym just it just blew my mind and I got it people go on vacation, you know, I was in Vegas, so most people are there for vacation.
• 23:07
  [SPEAKER_00]: I was there for a cheer cop and they're like, I want to do it.
• 23:10
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'm not going to get up like no, this is my vacation.
• 23:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: This is my time off and they don't go.
• 23:15
  [SPEAKER_00]: Most people don't have someone going, hey, you're going to Vegas this weekend.
• 23:21
  [SPEAKER_00]: So when you're going to work out, just the hotel of Jim, did you check it out?
• 23:24
  [SPEAKER_00]: Like, what's it like?
• 23:25
  [SPEAKER_00]: What are you going to do?
• 23:26
  [SPEAKER_00]: Instead, I don't have someone checking on me, but you better believe that I was posting and sharing with my group.
• 23:31
  [SPEAKER_00]: Hey, guys, I'm in Vegas.
• 23:33
  [SPEAKER_00]: This is my schedule.
• 23:34
  [SPEAKER_00]: This is what I'm doing.
• 23:34
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'm staying on track.
• 23:36
  [SPEAKER_00]: Just sharing this to you guys can help me stay on track.
• 23:39
  [SPEAKER_00]: It blows my mind of just how many people just weren't there and really could have been there.
• 23:44
  [SPEAKER_00]: So a couple of things that I see with coaching, environment, and I really want you to think that's, and I'm totally not sitting here just plugging my coaching and my group busy to Bob.
• 23:55
  [SPEAKER_00]: I mean, of course I am, but I'm not.
• 23:56
  [SPEAKER_00]: That's not what this is all about.
• 23:58
  [SPEAKER_00]: I want you to take a real honest to God look at your life and really start evaluating what you have in place.
• 24:06
  [SPEAKER_00]: Now some of you might be listening to me like, yeah, I coach with myself.
• 24:10
  [SPEAKER_00]: I got this in place
• 24:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: But really think about, okay, beyond that, what else do I have in place is my spouse supportive?
• 24:20
  [SPEAKER_00]: Are they working out?
• 24:21
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay, is that working for me?
• 24:23
  [SPEAKER_00]: Is that not working for me right now?
• 24:25
  [SPEAKER_00]: And another question is like, long term, what happens if I stay on this track?
• 24:30
  [SPEAKER_00]: And they don't in a year or two years?
• 24:33
  [SPEAKER_00]: Is that going to cost problems?
• 24:34
  [SPEAKER_00]: Does there need to be a conversation around that now?
• 24:37
  [SPEAKER_00]: That's your environment, that's something to think about and consider, okay?
• 24:41
  [SPEAKER_00]: If you are moving, how does that shift things?
• 24:44
  [SPEAKER_00]: You know, if you think that you're going to have to travel coming up in a year, and you might have to change locations, like, what does that look like, put something in place?
• 24:53
  [SPEAKER_00]: Will that move in that shift?
• 24:55
  [SPEAKER_00]: Whatever that shift might look like moving or whatever.
• 24:58
  [SPEAKER_00]: Do you have something in place to help support you through that?
• 25:01
  [SPEAKER_00]: Think about other big things that you could have coming up.
• 25:04
  [SPEAKER_00]: Maybe just summer, you know, think about the summer time.
• 25:07
  [SPEAKER_00]: And that's, you guys, that's going to be here around the corner.
• 25:10
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay, we're in winter right now.
• 25:11
  [SPEAKER_00]: Spring is going to be here before we know it.
• 25:14
  [SPEAKER_00]: And then it's going to be summer.
• 25:15
  [SPEAKER_00]: How does that shift with your work?
• 25:16
  [SPEAKER_00]: How does that shift with kids?
• 25:19
  [SPEAKER_00]: Do you have an environment or something in place now?
• 25:22
  [SPEAKER_00]: Now, right now, that can help you get through that vet.
• 25:26
  [SPEAKER_00]: Because right now, you want to be in it.
• 25:29
  [SPEAKER_00]: Stable, have a good routine, so you're not trying to figure those things out later when everything shifts.
• 25:37
  [SPEAKER_00]: And we can look ahead and we can always see things that are going to happen.
• 25:41
  [SPEAKER_00]: But people don't like to, they don't want to look ahead because they're like, Oh, I don't want to have to worry about that right now.
• 25:45
  [SPEAKER_00]: If I don't have to, that's tomorrow's problem.
• 25:48
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yes, true.
• 25:49
  [SPEAKER_00]: I get it.
• 25:49
  [SPEAKER_00]: However, when it comes to your health and fitness journey, those things that are tomorrow's problem can derail today's goals.
• 25:56
  [SPEAKER_00]: And what you're doing today is going to set you up for success.
• 25:59
  [SPEAKER_00]: Next month in the following month, what you do today is going to reflect and be how you show up in June, right now.
• 26:07
  [SPEAKER_00]: That's what determines it then.
• 26:09
  [SPEAKER_00]: But we wait.
• 26:10
  [SPEAKER_00]: We always fucking wait and it just drives me crazy.
• 26:14
  [SPEAKER_00]: Really think about this.
• 26:15
  [SPEAKER_00]: Are there anything that you're going to take away think about this and what you have in place to set you up for success?
• 26:21
  [SPEAKER_00]: Another big thing to that happens when you're in this and things start falling apart even if you have support because ghosting is a real thing.
• 26:32
  [SPEAKER_00]: You can 100% be in a group, have a coach and you can totally ghost someone.
• 26:37
  [SPEAKER_00]: You can just not show up and we call that isolation.
• 26:40
  [SPEAKER_00]: We call that ghosting in the dating world.
• 26:43
  [SPEAKER_00]: You're like,
• 26:43
  [SPEAKER_00]: things are going great.
• 26:44
  [SPEAKER_00]: And then all of a sudden, this pertinent, they're just gone, like, what the hell happened?
• 26:47
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, then you got ghosted.
• 26:49
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's the same thing on this.
• 26:51
  [SPEAKER_00]: And you can ghost yourself.
• 26:52
  [SPEAKER_00]: You can ghost your fitness journey.
• 26:54
  [SPEAKER_00]: Again, what do you have in place to make sure that doesn't happen?
• 26:56
  [SPEAKER_00]: And it can take, like I've already said, the most simplest things of a travel work travel, kid getting sick, you getting sick, changes at work.
• 27:06
  [SPEAKER_00]: you know, injury, bringing your ankle, having surgery, those types of things can totally throw you off track too.
• 27:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: And what do you have in place to get you through that?
• 27:16
  [SPEAKER_00]: And the isolation is real.
• 27:18
  [SPEAKER_00]: When things like this happen, people have a tendency to go into an isolation into a ghosting.
• 27:24
  [SPEAKER_00]: and I bring this up because I've had a habit many times.
• 27:28
  [SPEAKER_00]: There will be times where I'm trying to get a hold of a client for a couple of days and I don't hear from them.
• 27:33
  [SPEAKER_00]: And we communicate through an app we use Voxer and we can walk you talking and go back and forth.
• 27:37
  [SPEAKER_00]: And then I just go straight to their phone.
• 27:39
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'm like, look, I'm direct texting you.
• 27:41
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'm calling you.
• 27:42
  [SPEAKER_00]: What the hell is going on?
• 27:43
  [SPEAKER_00]: Where are you?
• 27:44
  [SPEAKER_00]: And usually like 90% of the time they have something major going on and they're like, I didn't know how to face you.
• 27:50
  [SPEAKER_00]: I didn't know how to tell you.
• 27:51
  [SPEAKER_00]: I fell off track.
• 27:52
  [SPEAKER_00]: I got drunk.
• 27:53
  [SPEAKER_00]: This happened and they isolate in the shame and I'm like, okay, we're going to get on and we're going to walk through this like what happened?
• 28:00
  [SPEAKER_00]: What were the steps that took you here?
• 28:02
  [SPEAKER_00]: Because if you didn't have me,
• 28:04
  [SPEAKER_00]: And you didn't have something in place, which they did, thank God they had something in place that was designed to support them.
• 28:09
  [SPEAKER_00]: What would this sort of look like?
• 28:10
  [SPEAKER_00]: And they're like, oh, oh, I wouldn't be going to the gym tomorrow.
• 28:14
  [SPEAKER_00]: I definitely would have been having more alcohol getting high.
• 28:16
  [SPEAKER_00]: I wouldn't be talking through it right now.
• 28:18
  [SPEAKER_00]: And we start going through the path of what happened.
• 28:21
  [SPEAKER_00]: And it's so crazy to hear the lies that people tell themselves.
• 28:27
  [SPEAKER_00]: It
• 28:27
  [SPEAKER_00]: Like just below my mind and what's crazy is that we will believe any lie that we tell ourselves, we believe our own wise.
• 28:38
  [SPEAKER_00]: We can convince ourselves of anything.
• 28:41
  [SPEAKER_00]: We can convince our self that we're still in love with someone.
• 28:44
  [SPEAKER_00]: We can convince ourselves that we don't love someone.
• 28:47
  [SPEAKER_00]: We can convince ourselves that we don't have feelings for someone anymore.
• 28:49
  [SPEAKER_00]: We can convince ourselves why we deserve this.
• 28:52
  [SPEAKER_00]: We can convince ourselves that I'll start Monday.
• 28:55
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'll start next
• 28:57
  [SPEAKER_00]: Oh, I deserve this and this is why you deserve this.
• 29:00
  [SPEAKER_00]: We can convince ourselves that, oh, I, I need to have this to shut my brain off.
• 29:05
  [SPEAKER_00]: I have to take this gummy because this is the only way I'm going to get sleep and this is the only way that I'm going to be able to just sit and relax and like be chill.
• 29:12
  [SPEAKER_00]: you do that over and over and over again and you keep telling yourself and you keep convincing yourself of that.
• 29:17
  [SPEAKER_00]: That is going to become reality.
• 29:19
  [SPEAKER_00]: But in the beginning and right now it's a lot you don't need that.
• 29:22
  [SPEAKER_00]: You just like that and it helps you get there but there are ways to get to your goal without those things and to knock off the line.
• 29:30
  [SPEAKER_00]: Again, this is an a therapy session.
• 29:31
  [SPEAKER_00]: We're not going to work through this like right now but really start thinking about this and I want you
• 29:37
  [SPEAKER_00]: Really try and catch yourself when you're starting to spit the lies.
• 29:40
  [SPEAKER_00]: I don't have time.
• 29:42
  [SPEAKER_00]: That's the biggest one.
• 29:43
  [SPEAKER_00]: Time and I don't have the money.
• 29:45
  [SPEAKER_00]: Oh my god, the amount of times that people have told me that they can't afford it and don't have the money.
• 29:51
  [SPEAKER_00]: And then what they really do, things like moving ships and I know, sometimes it's the case and people don't have money and you can't just like magically make money appear.
• 29:59
  [SPEAKER_00]: Like I get it.
• 30:00
  [SPEAKER_00]: but people use that as an excuse.
• 30:04
  [SPEAKER_00]: People 100% use that and they fully believe, no, this is why I can't, again, it's a lie that they tell themselves.
• 30:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: And we have to wash this, and this is where I want you to do this week.
• 30:16
  [SPEAKER_00]: I want you to really start paying attention.
• 30:19
  [SPEAKER_00]: what are the lies that I'm telling myself?
• 30:21
  [SPEAKER_00]: Is this true?
• 30:22
  [SPEAKER_00]: Because again, whether you have a coach, you're an environment, you had people supporting you, something designed to support you and can hold you, you can lie yourself out of that and then people isolate.
• 30:35
  [SPEAKER_00]: And when we go into isolation, when we go into isolation, I said that really weird.
• 30:40
  [SPEAKER_00]: When we go into isolation, you can start going into really dark places.
• 30:43
  [SPEAKER_00]: And I don't mean necessarily depression and anxiety and like all
• 30:48
  [SPEAKER_00]: not showing up for yourself anymore, just eating whatever, more alcohol, those are the types of things that can really start spiraling with.
• 30:57
  [SPEAKER_00]: And here's the thing, people are like, I know I should be able to pull myself out of this.
• 31:02
  [SPEAKER_00]: I know I can pull myself out of this, you know, I just need like a minute, you're lying, you're lying to yourself.
• 31:06
  [SPEAKER_00]: It is really tough to pull yourself out of things.
• 31:09
  [SPEAKER_00]: And we don't have to do that alone.
• 31:11
  [SPEAKER_00]: Start thinking about where are you lying to yourself
• 31:18
  [SPEAKER_00]: And I'll take it even a step further of how important this environment is to help support you when you're not feeling motivated, even if you are a pretty fit person.
• 31:27
  [SPEAKER_00]: And you're like, no, I go to the gym.
• 31:28
  [SPEAKER_00]: I love it.
• 31:28
  [SPEAKER_00]: I have a class or like, I work out at home.
• 31:31
  [SPEAKER_00]: Great.
• 31:32
  [SPEAKER_00]: There are so many other things that you're going to get.
• 31:35
  [SPEAKER_00]: And so many games you're going to have by having an environment that supports you.
• 31:39
  [SPEAKER_00]: You're going to have a place to release.
• 31:41
  [SPEAKER_00]: Like seriously, if you're someone who has a really high pressure job, you're high achieving like you are aggressive, like you go for it, like yeah, you're doing it.
• 31:51
  [SPEAKER_00]: Where's your release valve?
• 31:52
  [SPEAKER_00]: Most of them don't and they deal bullshit all day long at work.
• 31:57
  [SPEAKER_00]: And then they go home and I really don't want to talk about it again or they're like, I don't want to dump all this on my wife or my husband.
• 32:03
  [SPEAKER_00]: And it stays built up inside.
• 32:05
  [SPEAKER_00]: And that is energy in you that is not getting moving and it's toxic.
• 32:09
  [SPEAKER_00]: It is toxic AF.
• 32:11
  [SPEAKER_00]: Having an environment where you can release that and just talk about it, before you get home, it's powerful.
• 32:17
  [SPEAKER_00]: And I'm not saying, don't share with your spouse or, you know, I'm not saying any of that.
• 32:21
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yes, share, do whatever you want.
• 32:23
  [SPEAKER_00]: But having just like that slow little release, it's going to move the energy, and it's going to set you up to feel motivated a little bit later.
• 32:33
  [SPEAKER_00]: because if you don't release it, five o'clock could come around and you're like, I feel like shit because everything's been bottled up and you all day long, and you're not releasing it and getting it out.
• 32:44
  [SPEAKER_00]: And you feel like, don't you know what?
• 32:46
  [SPEAKER_00]: I feel like crap, but I haven't ended with the gym now.
• 32:48
  [SPEAKER_00]: I do feel a little bit better.
• 32:49
  [SPEAKER_00]: I feel like I do feel a little bit more motivated.
• 32:51
  [SPEAKER_00]: This is what we want.
• 32:54
  [SPEAKER_00]: I want you to, there's one more thing, okay?
• 32:57
  [SPEAKER_00]: We can normalize and we do.
• 32:59
  [SPEAKER_00]: quitting.
• 33:00
  [SPEAKER_00]: Very much so is that this is like it's so common.
• 33:04
  [SPEAKER_00]: I start working with people and they have normalized starting something and stopped.
• 33:09
  [SPEAKER_00]: They have normalized not fully hitting their goals.
• 33:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: They have normalized poor behavior.
• 33:16
  [SPEAKER_00]: They've normalized drinking.
• 33:17
  [SPEAKER_00]: They have normalized, I go every now and then I go to the gym on Monday and then make me on Saturday.
• 33:22
  [SPEAKER_00]: Like that's their
• 33:24
  [SPEAKER_00]: Whatever you have created as like your norm and that you have made completely normal to you to your environment, whatever you guys do, that can be reversed.
• 33:35
  [SPEAKER_00]: You can normalize not quitting.
• 33:38
  [SPEAKER_00]: You can normalize showing up even if you don't feel like it.
• 33:43
  [SPEAKER_00]: Whatever you've made your normal now, you can flip and make the exact opposite your norm.
• 33:49
  [SPEAKER_00]: That's encouraging.
• 33:51
  [SPEAKER_00]: That's amazing.
• 33:53
  [SPEAKER_00]: That's fucking cool.
• 33:54
  [SPEAKER_00]: And that's what we want.
• 33:56
  [SPEAKER_00]: So just remember that if it's become very normal for you to do any type of behavior, you can flip it.
• 34:03
  [SPEAKER_00]: And that sounds so great, right?
• 34:04
  [SPEAKER_00]: That sounds so motivating of me right now to just say to you, oh my god, that's so motivating, I was like, I can flip it out.
• 34:10
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, yeah, yeah, okay, let's skip all the bullshit.
• 34:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: How did you do that?
• 34:14
  [SPEAKER_00]: How do you normalize something else?
• 34:16
  [SPEAKER_00]: You have to practice.
• 34:18
  [SPEAKER_00]: You have to show up.
• 34:19
  [SPEAKER_00]: You have to do it when you don't feel like it.
• 34:21
  [SPEAKER_00]: But how do you do it when you don't feel like it?
• 34:24
  [SPEAKER_00]: Create an environment that's designed to carry you through when you know you don't got it.
• 34:30
  [SPEAKER_00]: And again, that might be coaching with me.
• 34:33
  [SPEAKER_00]: That might be my group busy to bond.
• 34:35
  [SPEAKER_00]: That might be a personal trainer.
• 34:37
  [SPEAKER_00]: That might be some other online coach.
• 34:40
  [SPEAKER_00]: I would ever again, I'm not her pitching.
• 34:43
  [SPEAKER_00]: I mean, I'm pitching, but I'm not hard pitching.
• 34:45
  [SPEAKER_00]: And this is one of the main reasons why I stopped doing personal training.
• 34:50
  [SPEAKER_00]: there was something missing.
• 34:52
  [SPEAKER_00]: I would kick people's asses, they would get results, and then for some reason at one away, whether that was a weekend, and they had it like just a binger, like terrible weekend or like whatever, then we were starting over on Monday, or it was like, oh, they were doing so good.
• 35:07
  [SPEAKER_00]: And they're like, I'm moving.
• 35:08
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay, they move.
• 35:10
  [SPEAKER_00]: And then they stopped.
• 35:11
  [SPEAKER_00]: And I think no, I'm going to find a gym when I move.
• 35:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: Awesome.
• 35:14
  [SPEAKER_00]: I follow up with them two months later.
• 35:18
  [SPEAKER_00]: we work so hard to get that offer you kidding me?
• 35:21
  [SPEAKER_00]: It happened all the time.
• 35:22
  [SPEAKER_00]: Or people are, you know, I think I could do this on my own.
• 35:25
  [SPEAKER_00]: Awesome, let's get you a game plan, let's graduate you, you know, and then I followed with them, they're like, I didn't keep going.
• 35:31
  [SPEAKER_00]: I talked with someone the other day and she's like, I, the last time I saw you, she's like, I put up 25 pounds.
• 35:36
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'm like, really, really?
• 35:38
  [SPEAKER_00]: She's like, yeah.
• 35:39
  [SPEAKER_00]: And I was like, I can't be a part of this problem anymore.
• 35:42
  [SPEAKER_00]: What is missing?
• 35:43
  [SPEAKER_00]: How do I, and then I kept thinking, like, how do I connect my clients?
• 35:47
  [SPEAKER_00]: Like, I have all these people coming in.
• 35:49
  [SPEAKER_00]: They're all on the same mission.
• 35:50
  [SPEAKER_00]: You know, they're all, they're all familiar with me.
• 35:52
  [SPEAKER_00]: How the fuck do I put them together and introduce them?
• 35:56
  [SPEAKER_00]: Then I'm like, oh my God, I could train people online.
• 36:00
  [SPEAKER_00]: I could make a group.
• 36:01
  [SPEAKER_00]: I could train them through an app and create workouts.
• 36:03
  [SPEAKER_00]: And then we all talk about it.
• 36:04
  [SPEAKER_00]: And then we all work together.
• 36:06
  [SPEAKER_00]: And then we can talk about nutrition and sex and relationships.
• 36:10
  [SPEAKER_00]: And our younger selves and what's holding us back.
• 36:14
  [SPEAKER_00]: And we can go deep into like all of it.
• 36:16
  [SPEAKER_00]: We could cheer each other on and busy to Bob and was born.
• 36:18
  [SPEAKER_00]: And then I'm like, what about the people that don't want to be in a group?
• 36:22
  [SPEAKER_00]: But they still want an environment.
• 36:23
  [SPEAKER_00]: They still need help.
• 36:24
  [SPEAKER_00]: What about the people that like need to be pushed?
• 36:27
  [SPEAKER_00]: And they're so freaking busy.
• 36:28
  [SPEAKER_00]: They don't have time to be in a group.
• 36:30
  [SPEAKER_00]: But they need it.
• 36:31
  [SPEAKER_00]: That mind coaching was born.
• 36:32
  [SPEAKER_00]: Like I can do both, let's go.
• 36:34
  [SPEAKER_00]: And it's all about having the environment in place to learn how to be the person that you want to be when the motivation isn't there.
• 36:42
  [SPEAKER_00]: You have a lot to think about after this episode.
• 36:44
  [SPEAKER_00]: And there might be parts of this episode that you're listening and going, I'm doing really good.
• 36:49
  [SPEAKER_00]: Take that in.
• 36:51
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, sometimes my episodes, I'm preaching to the choir.
• 36:54
  [SPEAKER_00]: I get that, like some of my clients listen.
• 36:57
  [SPEAKER_00]: And this is a message you need pounded into your brain regardless.
• 37:00
  [SPEAKER_00]: Even if you are doing all of the things and you're being successful, you still need to hear this message.
• 37:05
  [SPEAKER_00]: And then there's going to be other people listening going, oh man, I have a lot to think about.
• 37:08
  [SPEAKER_00]: And I do, I want you to think about the lies that you're telling yourself.
• 37:11
  [SPEAKER_00]: I want you to think about when and how you go into isolation.
• 37:14
  [SPEAKER_00]: I might have clients listening right now that go, oh my god.
• 37:18
  [SPEAKER_00]: I totally go small so she's who I was talking about or I do go into this isolation and what leads you into the isolation your lies I've had people tell me like she doesn't care like I'm not gonna bother her with this and I don't know if it's part of your journey and what you're going through I care, but we'll we'll isolate and we'll tell ourselves this.
• 37:36
  [SPEAKER_00]: I just got into a dark place and I didn't you know, I didn't show up
• 37:40
  [SPEAKER_00]: Start identifying what leads you into isolation.
• 37:43
  [SPEAKER_00]: Start identifying what takes you down that dark path because then you have power.
• 37:48
  [SPEAKER_00]: You can change it.
• 37:50
  [SPEAKER_00]: Look at your environment.
• 37:51
  [SPEAKER_00]: What is working?
• 37:52
  [SPEAKER_00]: What is not working?
• 37:54
  [SPEAKER_00]: And again, even if you're someone like super fit and you're working out, but you don't have girlfriends.
• 37:59
  [SPEAKER_00]: You're not interacting with anyone.
• 38:02
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's just you and your dog, and I say dog because Mr. Flex is on my left right now, you know, like that's not cool either and that's a form of isolation as well.
• 38:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: Lads to think about in this episode and you can be the person 1,000% that shows up even when you don't feel like it.
• 38:20
  [SPEAKER_00]: You totally can be the person that shows up for you.
• 38:23
  [SPEAKER_00]: because it's become who you are and the habit and you create change and you had someone support you to get there, that can be you.
• 38:30
  [SPEAKER_00]: It takes work, it takes reps and it takes practice, but it can be you.
• 38:34
  [SPEAKER_00]: And then you're going to live the rest of your life experiencing all the benefits of that and living, be living proof of it.
• 38:41
  [SPEAKER_00]: All right, everyone.
• 38:43
  [SPEAKER_00]: I want you to check out the show notes too.
• 38:45
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'm going to put a link in there for our new swag.
• 38:48
  [SPEAKER_00]: We have new.
• 38:48
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'm wearing mine right now.
• 38:50
  [SPEAKER_00]: My bomb life sweatshirt.
• 38:52
  [SPEAKER_00]: So we have really cool swag.
• 38:53
  [SPEAKER_00]: But we have new ones and one of them says consistency is greater than motivation.
• 38:58
  [SPEAKER_00]: I want you to get it, get in a sweatshirt, get in a shirt, get a take-tap, whatever.
• 39:02
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's really cool.
• 39:02
  [SPEAKER_00]: Then we have another one that says, build the life, not the excuse.
• 39:06
  [SPEAKER_00]: We have a couple other new ones coming in there.
• 39:08
  [SPEAKER_00]: So I'll put a link in there, go in there and get it.
• 39:10
  [SPEAKER_00]: When this comes out, we'll be running a sale.
• 39:12
  [SPEAKER_00]: So you guys can get them at totally like the cheapest price that I can possibly put it at.
• 39:15
  [SPEAKER_00]: And it's what it will be for you guys.
• 39:17
  [SPEAKER_00]: So check it out.
• 39:18
  [SPEAKER_00]: I love wearing my swag to the gym.
• 39:19
  [SPEAKER_00]: Like I'm looking at the mirror and being like, yeah, fuck yeah, consistency over motivation.
• 39:23
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's greater than motivation, fuck yeah it is.
• 39:27
  [SPEAKER_00]: wearing my sweatshirt.
• 39:28
  [SPEAKER_00]: That says let's freaking go.
• 39:29
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's it's my favorite.
• 39:31
  [SPEAKER_00]: So go go go to the show notes, check it all out, and then book a call.
• 39:35
  [SPEAKER_00]: Like if you're someone who's like, all right, Melissa, I heard this episode, like, yeah, I think I need to talk and let's see where you fall.
• 39:42
  [SPEAKER_00]: Maybe it is in a group program.
• 39:43
  [SPEAKER_00]: Maybe it's one on one.
• 39:44
  [SPEAKER_00]: Maybe it's something even smaller, a smaller step to start, but we can start somewhere.
• 39:49
  [SPEAKER_00]: All right, everyone have a wonderful week, wonderful weekend, and everyone stay safe, stay healthy, until next time.
• 39:59
  [SPEAKER_00]: The bottom-life podcast is for informational and entertainment purposes only.
• 40:02
  [SPEAKER_00]: The content shared here is not intended as medical, legal, or professional advice.
• 40:05
  [SPEAKER_00]: Always consult with a qualified professional before making any health fitness, financial, or legal decisions.
• 40:10
  [SPEAKER_00]: The opinions shared on this podcast are personal experiences and insight.
• 40:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: So if you need expert guidance, go find the right professional for you.
• 40:17
  [SPEAKER_00]: Thanks for listening.