Latest / Brooke and Jeffrey: Phone Taps / Phone Tap: Granny Got Sweet N' Low

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Phone Tap: Granny Got Sweet N' Low · Brooke and Jeffrey: Phone Taps

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Most of the time when people ask us to do
• 0:02
  Speaker 1: prank calls, they say their friend has a really short
• 0:05
  Speaker 1: temper about X, or their uncle is really irritable about
• 0:10
  Speaker 1: Why what do we do when we're asked to prank
• 0:17
  Speaker 1: a really nice guy who's very mellow and level headed
• 0:20
  Speaker 1: about everything, not normally, But they asked us to sure
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: we could say we detained his grandmother. Then what are
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: we supposed to do when he's still being kind and
• 0:32
  Speaker 1: reasonable about it? So I understand maybe I took it
• 0:37
  Speaker 1: possibly too far this time?
• 0:39
  Speaker 2: Already? Did you break someone?
• 0:41
  Speaker 1: This probably is going to be the last time this
• 0:43
  Speaker 1: phone tap ever airs before finds out about it. But
• 0:47
  Speaker 1: enjoy it while you can. It's your phone.
• 0:49
  Speaker 2: Tap right now. The twenties.
• 0:56
  Speaker 1: Hello, Hey, I'm looking for Gary.
• 1:00
  Speaker 2: This is him, they ask, she's calling?
• 1:02
  Speaker 1: Yeah, my name is Max. I'm the owner of the
• 1:05
  Speaker 1: cafe on sixth Street, and I have your grandma. Wait
• 1:12
  Speaker 1: what grandma Josie? She's here? Oh and I don't know
• 1:16
  Speaker 1: if you know this, but she comes into our cafe
• 1:18
  Speaker 1: quite a bit for breakfast, so just kind of a regular.
• 1:22
  Speaker 2: Okay, Well, what can I do for you? How can
• 1:25
  Speaker 2: I help you?
• 1:25
  Speaker 1: Well, unfortunately, today one of our waitresses spotted your grandma
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: shoving a handful of sweet and Lows into her old
• 1:32
  Speaker 1: lady purse. I was trying to make a run for it.
• 1:36
  Speaker 2: Aren't those free? I'm pretty sure you guys just will
• 1:39
  Speaker 2: leave him out for people.
• 1:40
  Speaker 1: Right, Normally that wouldn't be a huge deal, but we
• 1:43
  Speaker 1: forced her to open up her bag and it was
• 1:46
  Speaker 1: filled with tiny condiment packages from all over the city.
• 1:51
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, I'm that would make sense.
• 1:54
  Speaker 1: I mean, Grandma, oh, that would make your You know
• 1:57
  Speaker 1: about that, You're cool with that.
• 1:58
  Speaker 2: I mean, she's always all grown up. She's always had
• 2:00
  Speaker 2: like condom a packets and stuff we at her house.
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: But clearly your granny gets off on this sort of
• 2:06
  Speaker 1: thing because there's mustard packets in there, mayonnaise, even just
• 2:10
  Speaker 1: some loose honey in a ziplock bag.
• 2:13
  Speaker 2: She does love her honey, That's why she probably separated it.
• 2:15
  Speaker 2: That's weird, you.
• 2:16
  Speaker 1: Think, dum, Sorry, you think this is funny. She's not
• 2:19
  Speaker 1: stealing from restaurants.
• 2:21
  Speaker 2: Well, I don't know that's true. I mean, how could
• 2:23
  Speaker 2: you be feeling when they're things that you're allowed to take.
• 2:27
  Speaker 1: She's not allowed to grab like fifty sweet and lows
• 2:30
  Speaker 1: and toss it in her bag. She's allowed to use
• 2:32
  Speaker 1: a couple and use them at the table.
• 2:34
  Speaker 2: So wait, how do you even get my number? Like?
• 2:37
  Speaker 2: Did she my grandma give you my number?
• 2:40
  Speaker 1: Yes, she gave me your number after I zip tighter
• 2:42
  Speaker 1: to the grill in the back.
• 2:44
  Speaker 2: What you gip tighter to the grill?
• 2:46
  Speaker 1: That's yeah, okay, I had no choice.
• 2:49
  Speaker 2: Let me speak to my grandma right now.
• 2:51
  Speaker 1: I can't do that right now because last time I
• 2:53
  Speaker 1: tried to get close to her, she bit me.
• 2:56
  Speaker 2: What bit you?
• 2:57
  Speaker 1: It was probably my fault, honestly, because I had some
• 2:59
  Speaker 1: barbecue sauce on my hand and I should have known
• 3:03
  Speaker 1: better than to get close to a condiment crusher like Josie.
• 3:05
  Speaker 1: But we need to figure out what to do here.
• 3:08
  Speaker 2: What do you mean what to do? Let my grandma
• 3:09
  Speaker 2: go before I called the police on your store, and
• 3:11
  Speaker 2: have you got rested?
• 3:12
  Speaker 1: I think you're misunderstanding who's the criminal here?
• 3:16
  Speaker 2: Misunderstanding the definition of kidnapping? Sir? What did you say
• 3:20
  Speaker 2: your name was?
• 3:20
  Speaker 1: You don't have to worry about your grandma. She's fine.
• 3:23
  Speaker 1: We're feeding her packets of maple syrup.
• 3:26
  Speaker 2: That's not what Grandma Ice number one I told.
• 3:28
  Speaker 1: You if you like honey, Okay, I hear what's going
• 3:31
  Speaker 1: on here. You must be one of them liberals. What Yeah,
• 3:35
  Speaker 1: you just want to let You want to let the
• 3:38
  Speaker 1: criminals out of jail and run the whole city, don't
• 3:41
  Speaker 1: you that'd be better society in your mind?
• 3:44
  Speaker 2: How dare you speak to me like that? Okay? And you, how.
• 3:47
  Speaker 1: Dare your grandma come to my cafe and steal my
• 3:50
  Speaker 1: sweet and low?
• 3:51
  Speaker 2: I'm about to steal your face if you keep talking
• 3:53
  Speaker 2: to me like this, I'm about.
• 3:54
  Speaker 1: Why don't you come down to my cafe, I'll slug
• 3:57
  Speaker 1: you right in the face.
• 3:59
  Speaker 2: Go ahead, I dare you?
• 4:01
  Speaker 1: Liberal?
• 4:04
  Speaker 2: What are you?
• 4:04
  Speaker 1: You probably want me to get wrapped the cash register
• 4:07
  Speaker 1: and hand it to your grandma on the way out
• 4:09
  Speaker 1: of the store.
• 4:09
  Speaker 2: Huh. I need to chill the out. You're obviously going
• 4:11
  Speaker 2: through something.
• 4:12
  Speaker 1: Oh I'm chill.
• 4:13
  Speaker 2: We're talking about an eighty five year old grandma right
• 4:16
  Speaker 2: now with a criminals like a criminal. Yeah, okay, I
• 4:21
  Speaker 2: have some mine come down there in jip time you
• 4:25
  Speaker 2: or something? Oh, where to God?
• 4:26
  Speaker 1: Don't get kinky with me, guy, I'm not into that stuff.
• 4:31
  Speaker 2: I cannot believe you, Honestly.
• 4:34
  Speaker 1: I can't believe you, and I can't believe your brother
• 4:36
  Speaker 1: Bill either. What he said that you are a level
• 4:39
  Speaker 1: headed guy, not some uptight liberal with a zip tie fetish.
• 4:43
  Speaker 2: Now you're talking about my brother Bill.
• 4:45
  Speaker 1: Why Bill's Bill's on his way down to the cafe already.
• 4:49
  Speaker 1: He says he's gonna help me throw your sweet old
• 4:51
  Speaker 1: granny in the slammer right after I tell you it's
• 4:53
  Speaker 1: a prank call.
• 4:55
  Speaker 2: Bill would never do. Wait wait a minute, Oh, now
• 4:58
  Speaker 2: you hear me.
• 4:59
  Speaker 1: You finally get those by out to gradable straws out
• 5:01
  Speaker 1: of your ears. What my name is Jeff from the
• 5:04
  Speaker 1: radio show Brooke and Jeffrey in the Morning. Are you
• 5:06
  Speaker 1: serious we're doing a phone tap on you.
• 5:09
  Speaker 2: I was literally like about to have a heart attack.
• 5:12
  Speaker 2: I sure.
• 5:12
  Speaker 1: Gotten question is do you do you use you? Do
• 5:15
  Speaker 1: you want me to let your grandma go? Or should
• 5:17
  Speaker 1: she just stay tied up.
• 5:18
  Speaker 2: For a while? You know, I'm literally getting off the
• 5:21
  Speaker 2: phone Colin Dyll like twenty five seconds if he doesn't answer,
• 5:26
  Speaker 2: coming straight down to whatever damn coffee shop you just said.
• 5:29
  Speaker 1: Okay, I'll have the zip tides ready for both of us.
• 5:31
  Speaker 1: That's what us freaky liberals do, not.
• 5:33
  Speaker 2: Okay, you're individual week up every morning with phone taps
• 5:40
  Speaker 2: weekday mornings on the twenties, Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning,