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Phone Tap: Potty Police · Brooke and Jeffrey: Phone Taps

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: One eight hundred d ui away now offering free remote
• 0:02
  Speaker 1: consultations by phone or video conference for any criminal offense.
• 0:06
  Speaker 1: Trust Brooke, Jeffrey and Jose's friends with a free remote
• 0:09
  Speaker 1: consultation from Bradley Johnson Lawyers. Visit one eight hundred d
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  Speaker 1: Uyowa dot com or call. Some people are very liberal
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  Speaker 1: with their restroom time while at work. I can't think
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  Speaker 1: of anybody on this show, but some people, and I
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  Speaker 1: can definitely see why you'd want to spend a lot
• 0:27
  Speaker 1: of time in there because it's it's a nice quiet place.
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  Speaker 1: You can play games on your phone, FaceTime your sister
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  Speaker 1: while you're on the can. It's the only safe haven
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  Speaker 1: where your boss can't bug you to do stuff. Your
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  Speaker 1: sister answers, that is that's not true. They still bug you. Yeah,
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  Speaker 1: that's right. And until now, because we call a guy
• 0:47
  Speaker 1: to tell him the company knows that he's been abusing
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  Speaker 1: his toilet privileges and we have an interesting yet strange
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  Speaker 1: solution to fix it. In your phone tap right now,
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  Speaker 1: it's a Hello. This is Carl. Hi Carl, My name's
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: Lady guenevere Um. Excuse me, who did you say you were?
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  Speaker 1: I know, it's just what my parents named me. I'm
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  Speaker 1: from Hrum. I don't remember lady Guenevere from human resources.
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  Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I'm based out of Atlanta, so we haven't met. Okay,
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  Speaker 1: nice to meet you. Yeah, I was just seeing here
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  Speaker 1: your time card is due today and I just wanted
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  Speaker 1: to know if you wanted me to adjust it or
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  Speaker 1: if you were going to because I do have the
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  Speaker 1: number right in front of me. I'm sorry, I'm not
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  Speaker 1: sure what you're referring to. Well, I'm looking at it
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  Speaker 1: and it says you've put down full hours for the week. Yes,
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  Speaker 1: so what come on, Carl, we both know that's not true. No,
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  Speaker 1: it is. Yeah, having this today, you're correct about that,
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  Speaker 1: But you have been spending a lot of time building
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  Speaker 1: a log cabin. Sorry it's slang for using the restroom. Yeah,
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  Speaker 1: apparently you've been in there a lot, and we recently
• 2:10
  Speaker 1: set limits on that. So you can find it in
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  Speaker 1: the company handbook. Yeah, we passed it out earlier this year.
• 2:15
  Speaker 1: There's no way so there's anything about that. Oh it does. Yeah.
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  Speaker 1: Too many employees were taking advantage of, you know, time
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  Speaker 1: and just going in there with their phone while they
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  Speaker 1: were free in the turtles. I didn't do that and
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  Speaker 1: it's weird that you're using these type of references. Listen,
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  Speaker 1: I have had so many conversations like this, and I
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  Speaker 1: just need to change it up. Okay, different words, different
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  Speaker 1: slang saved me from this boring job. I'm not abusing
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  Speaker 1: my bathroomntil it is, I promise you, and I think
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  Speaker 1: anyone should be able to use the bathroom whatever they
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  Speaker 1: need to. Yeah, you know, I absolutely agree with you.
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  Speaker 1: They should be able to use the bathroom whenever they
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  Speaker 1: need to at home. And according to your direct supervisor,
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  Speaker 1: you are one of the top violators and releasing chocolate hostages.
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  Speaker 1: Oh god, can you stop doing that. That's what I'm
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  Speaker 1: asking you to do. Stop doing it. I cannot stop
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  Speaker 1: going to the bathroom. Okay, I have to use it
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  Speaker 1: a few times a day. That's just how a human
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  Speaker 1: body works. We have an idea. When you feel like
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  Speaker 1: it's time to squeeze a steamer, I just what what
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  Speaker 1: do you have? It's a souris for pooping. I'm just
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  Speaker 1: saying I need you to go to your supervisor and say,
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  Speaker 1: put a clock on me for four minutes. I'm about
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  Speaker 1: to park a custard. Oh god, oh my god, this
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  Speaker 1: is so gross. But he'll understand what you mean. He'll
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  Speaker 1: give you a thumbs up, and then just be back
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  Speaker 1: before the timer runs out and we'll all be good.
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  Speaker 1: Oh my god, this is so unprofessional. How am I
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  Speaker 1: having a conversation with a human resources person who's using
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  Speaker 1: just all this like gross flag about going to the bathroom.
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  Speaker 1: I'm just trying to relate here, okay, And you shouldn't
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  Speaker 1: be telling me when I can go to the bathroom. Well,
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  Speaker 1: then you shouldn't be spending hours in the bathroom, and
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  Speaker 1: then we wouldn't be having this conversation. Spending hours in
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  Speaker 1: the bathroom. Stop what your cor Dylan said. Okay, he said,
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  Speaker 1: you're in there at least four times a day baking
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  Speaker 1: some brownies. What does Dylan have to do with is
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  Speaker 1: why would he do that? Because Dylan actually wanted me
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  Speaker 1: to broadcast the whole thing over the radio. What's what
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  Speaker 1: he asked for? What? Yeah, I'm not really an HR.
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  Speaker 1: My name's Broke from the radio show Brooker Jeffrey in
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  Speaker 1: the morning, we're doing a phone tap on you. Oh god,
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  Speaker 1: i'd be a terrible HR person. Your coworker, Dylan set
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  Speaker 1: you up. He said, he said that you've been running
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  Speaker 1: late to meetings because you're spending so much time in
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  Speaker 1: the bathroom. Man, I'm not. Oh my god, you're not.
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  Speaker 1: Come on, so you can be honest with me, I'm not,
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  Speaker 1: actually hr okay, maybe sm but like not as much
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  Speaker 1: as he's saying. I'm baking he said, baking brownies. Yeah,
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  Speaker 1: that's right. I'm just gonna advise you right now to
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  Speaker 1: check with your supervisor next time you want to give
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  Speaker 1: birth to a state trooper. Okay, oh yes, way up
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  Speaker 1: every morning with Funk Tap Week The Twenties, Broke and
• 4:58
  Speaker 1: Jeffrey in the Morning