Latest / RiseUp - Live Joy Your Way / The Inside-Out Approach to Self-Care
Transcript
- 0:00SPEAKER_01: Today's episode is produced by my friends at Walk West.
- 0:03SPEAKER_01: If you're looking to grow your brand and generate leads through podcast or video production, head over to walkwest.com.
- 0:10SPEAKER_01: Okay, let's start the show.
- 0:14SPEAKER_00: Rise up, live joy your way.
- 0:19SPEAKER_00: From emotional intelligence through cognitive distortions, certified life and wellness coach Comedy Wood is on a mission to help people see the magnificence of their own unique human spirit.
- 0:30SPEAKER_00: Through these small bites of self-visualization and self-confidence, you can have healthy relationships, success in business and career, and live the life you want to live.
- 0:40SPEAKER_00: Rise up, live joy your way.
- 0:45SPEAKER_01: Hi there and welcome to another episode of Rise Up, Live Joy Your Way.
- 0:49SPEAKER_01: Whether it's morning, afternoon, or evening when you have chosen to tune in to this episode, I just want to say thank you for taking some time out of your day to spend with me.
- 0:59SPEAKER_01: And today we are going to be talking about self-care.
- 1:03SPEAKER_01: Self-care has become such a buzzword, it seems, these days.
- 1:54SPEAKER_01: And to take time to do certain things that make you feel good.
- 1:58SPEAKER_01: And absolutely a face mask, a scrub bath, all those things are wonderful.
- 2:03SPEAKER_01: So I'm absolutely in in alignment with that.
- 2:06SPEAKER_01: The what I'm saying though is that the the thing that the issue that pops up for me is that when we talk about self-care and self-love with the air quotes around self, we kind of start to lose the work on the inner self, the inner being, the inner knowing.
- 2:23SPEAKER_01: And so those of us who work in this area of just because this is what my coaching practice is all about, is that relationship with self, it it starts to um, I think it starts to that those those words of self-love and self-care start to lose meaning or they become um just covered up with layers of what that really means.
- 2:44SPEAKER_01: So, you know, how should we really be talking about self-care and self-love?
- 2:49SPEAKER_01: Um, really just recognizing that self-care doesn't always feel like it's self-care.
- 2:57SPEAKER_01: And what I mean by that is it's not always um when we're doing when we're practicing self-care, it might not always feel great.
- 3:06SPEAKER_01: For instance, self-care is taking time to ask yourself what you're feeling and to name those feelings and become aware of those feelings.
- 3:15SPEAKER_01: That doesn't always feel good, that doesn't always feel wonderful.
- 3:20SPEAKER_01: Um, it it can be kind of hard sometimes to recognize what you're feeling.
- 3:25SPEAKER_01: It can be a challenge, it can be uncomfortable, and sometimes it's that in and of itself can be exhausting and tiring.
- 3:32SPEAKER_01: So, and while that may sound um counterintuitive or counter-impro counterproductive to the concept of self-care, when you are taking the time to become emotionally aware of what you're going through, you are actually caring for yourself in a totally different way, and it allows you to learn and build the muscle of how to focus on yourself for long-term health and well-being, long-term growth rather than just a small portion of time or just um what I would refer to as putting a band-aid on a situation as to for temporary relief.
- 4:07SPEAKER_01: So, self-care is about doing things that help us grow and help us heal and help us transform and help us integrate and move into the place that we really truly want to be for ourselves and in and and to really live into that vision we have.
- 4:26SPEAKER_01: So, when I'm talking about self-care and and self-love, again, absolutely take the time to pamper yourself.
- 4:34SPEAKER_01: That that that's not what this episode is about, but it's about talking about other ways that we can practice self-care with a more of a focus on the inside out approach.
- 4:45SPEAKER_01: So, for instance, things like setting boundaries, you know, making sure that you're drawing lines around, you know, what works for you and what doesn't.
- 4:54SPEAKER_01: So setting boundaries for yourself is really, really important.
- 4:58SPEAKER_01: What that also helps do is separate yourself from codependent toxic relationships.
- 5:03SPEAKER_01: And so when you're able to do that, that's an act of self-care.
- 5:08SPEAKER_01: Um, making sure that you know what triggers you, you know, what sets you off.
- 5:15SPEAKER_01: Taking time to make, you know, have a list of them, understand when you're gonna be triggered, not because you're gonna overfocus on it, but because once you're aware of it, you can then take aligned action, you can then make commitments to yourself, you can then put in place what you're going to do when you feel that way, when you feel triggered.
- 5:34SPEAKER_01: How are you going to handle that?
- 5:36SPEAKER_01: That's an act of self-care.
- 5:37SPEAKER_01: You know, again, going back to somewhat of the boundaries, it's about learning how to say no without the guilt, right?
- 5:44SPEAKER_01: Learning how to say no without your inner critic popping up to say, oh, I probably should have, I should have done that.
- 5:51SPEAKER_01: That's another example of self-care because what we're doing there is we're we're we're really engaging in things that we choose to do versus things that we feel like we have to do or we ought to do.
- 6:03SPEAKER_01: Um, other things that we can do to practice self-care is um giving ourselves permission to make mistakes, recognizing that we're not perfect beings.
- 6:13SPEAKER_01: And so practicing self-compassion is a huge way of practicing self-care.
- 6:18SPEAKER_01: It's kindness over judgment, recognizing that we're going to maybe choose to do something that doesn't turn out the way that we want it to.
- 6:26SPEAKER_01: And instead of beating ourselves up, it's about how can I learn from this?
- 6:31SPEAKER_01: What's the next next time, what might I do differently to move myself forward?
- 6:37SPEAKER_01: Taking time to slow down, burnout is a huge issue that I think we're facing.
- 6:42SPEAKER_01: And I've talked about it on this podcast.
- 6:44SPEAKER_01: I'm sure I'll have more episodes about it because it just seems to be a rampant thing that we we deal with throughout society.
- 6:51SPEAKER_01: But taking time to slow down, again, releasing this idea that if I don't keep going all the time, you know, constantly, something bad's gonna happen or I should feel bad about that fact.
- 7:03SPEAKER_01: It's self-care is an act of taking a moment to give yourself a breather, you know, refuel yourself.
- 7:10SPEAKER_01: That's an act of self-care.
- 7:12SPEAKER_01: Um taking time to uh forgive yourself.
- 7:17SPEAKER_01: So often the inner critic takes hold and says, You shouldn't have done it that way, and you're you're stupid, you're an idiot, you're all these things.
- 7:25SPEAKER_01: And and we actually carry that with us.
- 7:28SPEAKER_01: So slowing down enough to start recognizing what are some of those areas where you might not have forgiven yourself and taking time to work through that.
- 7:37SPEAKER_01: You know, what did I what do I perceive that I did wrong?
- 7:41SPEAKER_01: Uh, do I need to make amends for something?
- 7:44SPEAKER_01: Taking the efforts and the steps to do that, and then also allowing that room to release it from your core and not carrying it with you.
- 7:53SPEAKER_01: Other very tactical things around self-care are recognizing relationships that are no longer to your benefit and blocking people.
- 8:02SPEAKER_01: You know, it's not mean or awful of you to practice the act of self-care by blocking people who don't make you or don't, I don't want to say make you feel good because at the end of the day, you're responsible for your own feelings.
- 8:16SPEAKER_01: But when you are taking ownership of that, if you're around people that when you walk away from that conversation or time with that person, you don't feel good.
- 8:27SPEAKER_01: It's an act of self-care to recognize what relationships are raising you up and which ones are bringing you down and releasing the ones that are no longer raising you up.
- 8:39SPEAKER_01: We need to take time to pay attention to our authentic needs.
- 8:43SPEAKER_01: That is practicing self-care, our authentic needs, our authentic desires, recognizing to that when we are overgiving and over-functioning, these are ways that we can practice self-care from the inside out.
- 8:59SPEAKER_01: Taking time to keep a journal, recognize patterns, recognize cycles, and be able to learn, as I said before, to say no, being able to accept help when you need it rather than saying no, I've got this all the time.
- 9:15SPEAKER_01: That again can be an act of self-care is recognizing that you can ask for help and you can get vulnerable with the people that are your people, with the people that you feel emotionally safe with.
- 9:26SPEAKER_01: So, just some ideas of how we can practice self-care that go beyond the way that we're generally marketed to in terms of what self-care is.
- 9:36SPEAKER_01: Yes, those things are self-care, but they're mainly focused on the outside.
- 9:39SPEAKER_01: What I challenge you to do is take a look on the inside.
- 9:42SPEAKER_01: What do you need and what can you practice in terms of self-care from the inside out?
- 9:48SPEAKER_01: As I mentioned, my coaching practice is all about the relationship with self, relational self-awareness, how to become a self-leader.
- 9:55SPEAKER_01: This is one of the things that we talk about routinely in client sessions is what are you doing to really honor yourself?
- 10:02SPEAKER_01: If you feel like you might need support around something like this to help you move forward, whether it be professionally or personally, don't ever feel like you have to be shy.
- 10:12SPEAKER_01: Feel free to reach out.
- 10:13SPEAKER_01: You can book a time to talk with me at any time at chatwithcomedy.com.
- 10:18SPEAKER_01: And until next time, stay well.
- 10:23SPEAKER_00: Thank you for listening to Rise Up, Live Joy Your Way.
- 10:26SPEAKER_00: For more information, book a chat with comedy at www.chatwithcomedy.com.
- 10:32SPEAKER_00: Or visit her website at www.comedywood.com.
- 10:37SPEAKER_00: You can also find comedy on Facebook or Instagram.
- 10:40SPEAKER_00: Username it's authentic me.
- 10:43SPEAKER_00: Thank you for listening.