Latest / She Rises with Ashy & Tijana / Thursday thoughts - cosmetic surgery, the media, regret, change, motherhood and more - this is interesting with Katie Ford 🤔 🔪 🫨

Transcript

Thursday thoughts - cosmetic surgery, the media, regret, change, motherhood and more - this is interesting with Katie Ford 🤔 🔪 🫨 · She Rises with Ashy & Tijana

0:05
Speaker 1: Apologie production Grow and Glows Twelve Days of Christmas. Hello everybody,
0:15
Speaker 1: welcome back to Grow and Glow twelve Days of Christmas.
0:17
Speaker 1: I've got one of my oldest beautiful girlfriends on here, Katie.
0:20
Speaker 1: Thank you so much for joining us.
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Speaker 2: Ah, thank you so much for having me. I'll take
0:23
Speaker 2: any opportunity to chat with you.
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Speaker 1: I love our conversations that we have, and I always
0:27
Speaker 1: love your perspective on things. So today it's just called
0:30
Speaker 1: Thursday Thoughts, and I've got a bunch of random questions
0:33
Speaker 1: going to ask you because I'm just genuinely curious and
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Speaker 1: I think a lot of these topics people will be
0:37
Speaker 1: chatting about with their girlfriends and just called a here
0:39
Speaker 1: different perspectives. So are you ready for some real random questions?
0:43
Speaker 2: Throw them at me? Okay?
0:46
Speaker 1: My first one is, what are your thoughts on changing
0:48
Speaker 1: your mind? Why are we so afraid or why do
0:52
Speaker 1: we think it's wrong to change jobs or change relationships
0:55
Speaker 1: or to change friendships. I feel like there's this like
0:58
Speaker 1: icky stigma around it being a bad thing. What's your
1:01
Speaker 1: thoughts on it?
1:02
Speaker 2: It's hard, right, Like, when ever we approach change, it's
1:07
Speaker 2: always difficult for us to do and we come up
1:09
Speaker 2: against roadblocks. But the thing is, our brains don't care
1:13
Speaker 2: if we're happy. They just care if we're safe. And
1:17
Speaker 2: the way that our brains work is that the same
1:20
Speaker 2: equals safe, So it doesn't care if you're miserable or
1:25
Speaker 2: it will always choose a familiar hell over an unfamiliar happiness. Right.
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Speaker 2: So that's what makes change, and you know, doing anything
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Speaker 2: new so challenging, and our brain's going to throw everything
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Speaker 2: that we possibly can at us. It's going to think
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Speaker 2: of every possible reason that could go wrong. It's going
1:45
Speaker 2: to bring up all of our old stuff, it's going
1:47
Speaker 2: to bring up all of our insecurities, and that's its job.
1:51
Speaker 2: When you understand why things are coming up for you
1:55
Speaker 2: and what that's doing. It doesn't necessarily and change doesn't
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Speaker 2: necessarily mean that you shouldn't be doing something. It just
2:01
Speaker 2: or that you're incapable of doing something. It just means
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Speaker 2: that it's new you and that can totally change the
2:07
Speaker 2: way that you look at it. So your brain is
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Speaker 2: meant to keep you safe. So that's why change feels
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Speaker 2: so daunting and unfamiliar, and it can feel icky, and
2:19
Speaker 2: then you know, if you've got other limiting beliefs, around
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Speaker 2: you know what you've always done, and living for other
2:28
Speaker 2: people and making other people happy. Then that adds another
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Speaker 2: layer of it as well.
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Speaker 1: I love the old saying too that friendships and relationships
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Speaker 1: and even jobs and stuff, like some things in your
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Speaker 1: life for a reason or for a lesson or to
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Speaker 1: expand us, Like there's always a purpose for someone being
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Speaker 1: in your life. But it doesn't necessarily mean it has
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Speaker 1: to be forever.
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Speaker 2: I totally agree. And it's so okay if the answer changes.
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Speaker 2: It's so okay if that relationship evolves and changes, and
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Speaker 2: every chapter has an ending, so true, every single one.
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Speaker 2: That means that the good things are also going to
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Speaker 2: come to an end, which could be like your newbornce
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Speaker 2: no one. I don't know very many people who really
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Speaker 2: love the newborn stat you know, like the best holiday
3:12
Speaker 2: is going to come to an end, that best honeymoon
3:14
Speaker 2: phase in your relationship might come to an end. And
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Speaker 2: that's not to say that things won't get better, but
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Speaker 2: they will change. And getting comfortable with the discomfort of
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Speaker 2: knowing what's going to come next, that's a really cool
3:28
Speaker 2: place to dive into as well, and you start to
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Speaker 2: get to know yourself more. But yeah, change can be
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Speaker 2: really uncomfortable because it's new, not because it's not what
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Speaker 2: you should be doing.
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Speaker 1: So true, and the only thing that we are really
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Speaker 1: guaranteed in life has changed totally.
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Speaker 2: Change is the only constant. Yeah, the only constant thing
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Speaker 2: is that this second is not going to come again,
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Speaker 2: and that we don't know what's going to happen tomorrow.
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Speaker 2: And that can be as comforting or as scary as
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Speaker 2: what you choose to make it right. It's like when
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Speaker 2: nothing is possible, anything is possible, When nothing is certain,
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Speaker 2: anything is possible. And that can I either expand your
4:06
Speaker 2: world or scare the diesels out of you. Jesels, you
4:11
Speaker 2: need to bring it back. I feel like it's forgot
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Speaker 2: some late. It sounds like a caffin kim thing totally,
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Speaker 2: but Jesels, dazzle it or something. Oh thank you.
4:21
Speaker 1: My next question is really random because I feel everyone
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Speaker 1: has different opinions on it. But what's your opinion on.
4:27
Speaker 2: The news radio media?
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Speaker 1: Because I know Steve at the moment, he is just
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Speaker 1: all about Twitter because it's just so unfiltered and everything
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Speaker 1: can be put on there and the truth and what's
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Speaker 1: actually going on in the world and what gets I
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Speaker 1: suppose filtered through our mainstream media is on there, so
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Speaker 1: we don't watch news as it is. But I definitely
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Speaker 1: know some people are like, oh my god, you see
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Speaker 1: this on the news, and I'm like, I just don't
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Speaker 1: fully trust it, though, what's your opinions on it?
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Speaker 2: All? One hundred percent? My family, my parents are one
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Speaker 2: hundred percent news watches. Like they sit there and it's
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Speaker 2: the mainstream media or bust. Like their world consists of
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Speaker 2: what they see come through their screen. Now the way
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Speaker 2: I sort of see it, it's in two parts. Do
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Speaker 2: I think it's really important that we stay up to
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Speaker 2: date and across current world demands? Absolutely? Do. I think
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Speaker 2: that we'll get that through the standardized media outlets that
5:19
Speaker 2: are owned by big corporations and all that jazz. No,
5:23
Speaker 2: And we've learnt that what is brought to us through
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Speaker 2: mainstream TV and news outlets that way and the newspapers generally,
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Speaker 2: it's filtered, and it's chosen, and it's specific, and it's
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Speaker 2: for certain agendas now, whatever the agenda may be. So
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Speaker 2: I think it's really important that you seek out your
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Speaker 2: own reputable sources, that you are conscious of every piece
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Speaker 2: of information that you consume, and you're also really mindful
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Speaker 2: about when you choose to do that. So stay across
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Speaker 2: it all, of course, and I definitely try to. But
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Speaker 2: I'm also I know, with so much that's happening overseas
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Speaker 2: far out, I can't get my head around it, and
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Speaker 2: I can't get my heart can't hold it. I'm as
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Speaker 2: up to date as what I can be. As humans,
6:12
Speaker 2: we have never been privy to so much of the
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Speaker 2: world's horrors and things that are going on in one
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Speaker 2: moment in time, and that can be a whole lot
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Speaker 2: to hold. So I think it's really important that on
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Speaker 2: a personal level we watch our consumption of it, but
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Speaker 2: on a humanitarian level, we need to make sure that
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Speaker 2: we're aware and doing everything that we can. But you've
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Speaker 2: got a question, and like come at it with a
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Speaker 2: gentle curiosity. Yes, I think with the headlines that are
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Speaker 2: getting our attention and these big, broad sweeping statements that
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Speaker 2: you often see come across And even the kids came
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Speaker 2: to me with something the other day and I was like,
6:52
Speaker 2: lean in, like get curious with that. It's good to
6:55
Speaker 2: start questioning, Like obviously, don't question you, mother, but question
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Speaker 2: everything else. Kidding, they can question me as well, and
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Speaker 2: I'm sure they do. But I think that it's really
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Speaker 2: important part of when it comes to media in general,
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Speaker 2: whether it's your Instagram or what or like that seems
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Speaker 2: quite light, or Twitter or your news outlets or what
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Speaker 2: you're reading that is this true for you? What's the
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Speaker 2: benefit of whoever's sharing this information? What are they going
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Speaker 2: to get out of this? Or is this factually true?
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Speaker 2: And is it true for me? And is this something
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Speaker 2: that is going to benefit me to learn more on? Yeah,
7:33
Speaker 2: it's such a fine line, is it.
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Speaker 1: Because Steve will feed me different things that are going
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Speaker 1: on in the world, and sometimes they say what you
7:38
Speaker 1: just said, I'm like, I can't hold that, babe, Like
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Speaker 1: I don't want to know any more details of what
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Speaker 1: they're doing to the children over there, Like, oh, we're
7:44
Speaker 1: consumed in it. I go down a rabbit hole. It
7:46
Speaker 1: then affects my energy. I can't be the mom I
7:48
Speaker 1: want to be. And I've done it before with the
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Speaker 1: sex slavery. I've went in this deep, dark rabbit hole
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Speaker 1: and it consume me for months, and I just it's
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Speaker 1: really really hard. You want to be able to do
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Speaker 1: your bit, but yeah, you can only hold so much and.
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Speaker 2: Yeah, how is it benefiting you?
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Speaker 1: And at the end of the day, like, you can't
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Speaker 1: save everyone. It's no hard consuming all the information, it
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Speaker 1: doesn't make you be able to save every kid on earth.
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Speaker 1: You know, you do what you can and what you
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Speaker 1: hold what you can hold. And I think it's important
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Speaker 1: to be informed as to what's going on and support
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Speaker 1: who you can support and whatever charities organizations. But there
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Speaker 1: becomes a line for me.
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Speaker 2: Absolutely, And I think there's so much stigma around that
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Speaker 2: saying that as well, Like some people are like, you
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Speaker 2: should be watching everything twenty four to seven? Did it?
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Speaker 2: And it's like, how is that helping? How? Yeah, how's
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Speaker 2: it imperspossible? There's so much happening, so much happening, and
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Speaker 2: it's like, when we can, we do. Yes. I think
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Speaker 2: that's that when you can, you do and you don't
8:44
Speaker 2: look away. I think that's really important as well. When
8:46
Speaker 2: you're in a conversation, or you find yourself given an
8:49
Speaker 2: opportunity to have an insightful conversation, or you hear something
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Speaker 2: that perhaps doesn't maybe align with what you know you
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Speaker 2: believe to be true, and you feel safe enough to
9:00
Speaker 2: do so, challenge it a little, have the deeper, meaningful conversation,
9:05
Speaker 2: connect with the people around you and grow that way
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Speaker 2: and see if you can do it that way. Donate
9:11
Speaker 2: where you can. I mean, the possibilities are endless in
9:15
Speaker 2: the ways that we can help. But I don't believe
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Speaker 2: that just constantly filling our mind and our hearts with
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Speaker 2: information that we as one person can't do anything about.
9:28
Speaker 2: Worded it so perfectly. What are your thoughts on regret.
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Speaker 1: It's a big open air question, but I'd just love
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Speaker 1: to hear your perspective on regret in general.
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Speaker 2: It's so dank, isn't it. Like regret is such a
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Speaker 2: heavy well. It feels really heavy for me and my
9:44
Speaker 2: body because I think I left little I left. I
9:47
Speaker 2: did leave my twenties, but I lived most of my
9:50
Speaker 2: late twenties and early thirties filled in a shame spiral
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Speaker 2: of all sorts, like whether that's just because I had
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Speaker 2: new babies. Well, I made some very questionable life choices,
10:01
Speaker 2: as we all have. That shame spiral got me nowhere.
10:05
Speaker 2: It just kept me digging down and down and down
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Speaker 2: and down. The regret and reflection are two sides of
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Speaker 2: the same coin. Regret feels dark and heavy. But if
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Speaker 2: we regret something and it gives us the opportunity to
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Speaker 2: reflect then on that moment, on that instance, on that situation, choice,
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Speaker 2: the way that we showed up that can then become
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Speaker 2: something really beautiful and a stepping stone within our life.
10:31
Speaker 2: I don't have now as this person. I mean, I
10:37
Speaker 2: regret what I wore the other day because I can
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Speaker 2: have those, But the big situations they've softened over time.
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Speaker 2: But time won't heal all forms of regret. Reflection has
10:50
Speaker 2: to do that. So it comes back to the way
10:53
Speaker 2: that we choose to perceive and the way that we
10:57
Speaker 2: choose to live through our moments. I think that is
11:02
Speaker 2: what gives you the relationship with regret. Steve Jobs say,
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Speaker 2: we could only connect the dots looking backwards, and there
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Speaker 2: I can see now in hindsight, and the moments where
11:10
Speaker 2: I didn't listen to my intuition. They get me for years.
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Speaker 2: They kept me up at night. They were a big
11:17
Speaker 2: because of the flow on effect from that. But rather
11:20
Speaker 2: than regret, if we can soften it in time when
11:23
Speaker 2: the time's right, we don't want to take away the punch,
11:25
Speaker 2: the weight of the punch of whatever it is that
11:27
Speaker 2: we needed to learn, because you're not going to, you know,
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Speaker 2: make a life choice that has large ramifications upon you
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Speaker 2: and then go, oh, well, let's all just reflect, shall
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Speaker 2: We know you're going to go out or be devastated
11:43
Speaker 2: or be heartbroken, and you're not just going to like
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Speaker 2: double gun it and be stoked and positive thinking way
11:49
Speaker 2: out of that. It has to hurt before you can heal,
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Speaker 2: and so regret hopefully leads to reflection, which then hopefully
11:56
Speaker 2: leads to growth. That's beautiful.
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Speaker 1: Does that whole statement you just put there? Have to
12:01
Speaker 1: hurt to be able to heal.
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Speaker 2: So then we have in order we regret to reflect
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Speaker 2: to grow. Oh, that's beautiful, to reflect to grow, mic Drop.
12:11
Speaker 1: I always feel like you have these amazing white jobs
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Speaker 1: and like they stick with me for life. There's been
12:15
Speaker 1: so many open years.
12:16
Speaker 2: I'm so glad they clearly go in one ear and
12:20
Speaker 2: out the other for me. But at least we can
12:22
Speaker 2: get it back or record it back exactly. All right?
12:26
Speaker 1: Next question, what's your thoughts on plastic surgery? I know
12:29
Speaker 1: you got your implants out, but overall, what are your
12:32
Speaker 1: thoughts on it? And has it changed you know, from
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Speaker 1: your twenties to where you are at now?
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Speaker 2: Oh? For sure, I have no issues with anyone doing
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Speaker 2: whatever they feel or they want to do in order
12:46
Speaker 2: to make themselves feel good. I don't think that we
12:49
Speaker 2: have any right to say what anyone else should be doing.
12:53
Speaker 2: And if you're feeling fillers or botox or you know,
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Speaker 2: like I had giant double D breast implants, did I
13:03
Speaker 2: enjoy them? No? Did I get them for the right reasons?
13:05
Speaker 2: Absolutely not. But again I don't have regret because I
13:08
Speaker 2: got that opportunity to reflect on that. But I didn't
13:11
Speaker 2: have that until ten years down the line. But you
13:16
Speaker 2: couldn't have talked me out of it. No one could
13:18
Speaker 2: have talked me out of it. I thought it was
13:19
Speaker 2: going to fix everything, but the deeper issues often don't
13:24
Speaker 2: come to the surface right until far later down the line.
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Speaker 2: We don't have that emotional capacity. I am all about aging. Well,
13:34
Speaker 2: I'm forty two now, so I'm absolutely working with what
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Speaker 2: I've got in the ways that are available to me.
13:41
Speaker 2: I want to look my best self and feel how
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Speaker 2: I feel. On the outside. I feel young, but then
13:49
Speaker 2: I wake up and I'm like, dang, you look tired
13:54
Speaker 2: doing all the things. And that's okay, because then it's
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Speaker 2: like that for me. And I don't know if this
13:59
Speaker 2: is a controversial take, but you look good, you feel good. Yes,
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Speaker 2: as well as feel good, you look good. So it's
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Speaker 2: not get the inside right and the outside will fall
14:08
Speaker 2: into place. It's a mixture of both. Like if you're
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Speaker 2: taking care of yourself in a way that feels good
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Speaker 2: to you and you're giving a shit like as in
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Speaker 2: you're doing your hair, I know it doesn't look like it,
14:20
Speaker 2: but no, you put a bit of time and energy
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Speaker 2: into your appearance. Or if I do that, I feel
14:28
Speaker 2: better when I'm going out there. It shows up in
14:31
Speaker 2: your energy, it does. It all works together and it's
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Speaker 2: all pieces. So do I think that getting plastic surgery
14:38
Speaker 2: will help you feel better about yourself? That depends. That
14:41
Speaker 2: would not be my first protocol ever, But if there's
14:45
Speaker 2: something that you can do that's within your availability that
14:49
Speaker 2: will support you in feeling the way that you wish
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Speaker 2: to feel about yourself, feel your boots.
14:54
Speaker 1: Love it, love it. I agree everything you've just said.
14:58
Speaker 1: What are your thoughts on twenty twenty five? Do you
15:00
Speaker 1: have any intuition, any conspiracy theories, anything that you think
15:04
Speaker 1: is going to happen? And for me, I think they're
15:06
Speaker 1: gonna put lockdowns back in place by the end.
15:08
Speaker 2: Of next year. I fluffing. Hope not ever.
15:12
Speaker 1: I know, I hope not either. But I just feel
15:14
Speaker 1: from the information that I've been fed on Twitter and
15:17
Speaker 1: what Steve has been saying, just the things who have read,
15:19
Speaker 1: I just feel like it's part of the bigger plan.
15:21
Speaker 1: And I just I feel like if by the next year,
15:23
Speaker 1: we will be restricted to travel and they'll have a
15:26
Speaker 1: bit more control, and there'll be more rules, and they'll
15:29
Speaker 1: do it in a really slow, controlled way. I don't
15:31
Speaker 1: know conspiracy theory, but.
15:32
Speaker 2: I believe that there is bigger forces at play. When
15:36
Speaker 2: you watch what's happening overseas, especially in the US, and
15:39
Speaker 2: especially with women with reproductive rights and things like that,
15:42
Speaker 2: that makes me very nervous because what happens over there
15:46
Speaker 2: generally slowly filters over here. I am also not US,
15:50
Speaker 2: so I don't know if I can fully grasp the
15:53
Speaker 2: weight of that. I can see how different rights are
15:58
Speaker 2: being taken away from so many different like minorities an individual,
16:03
Speaker 2: so I hope that's not coming over here. What I
16:06
Speaker 2: would love to encourage people to keep doing is to
16:08
Speaker 2: keep connecting back in with themselves, and keep connecting back
16:10
Speaker 2: in with each other, and keep looking out for each other.
16:14
Speaker 2: But I can see how like without being on Twitter.
16:18
Speaker 2: I'm not on Twitter, there's movement. Oh my gosh, you
16:21
Speaker 2: rattled me with that one. I'm like, I can't go
16:23
Speaker 2: back into lockdown.
16:24
Speaker 1: And it could be completely wrong. That's what conspiracy theory is.
16:27
Speaker 1: It's just people thinking of throwing things out there or whatever.
16:29
Speaker 1: I hope it's not right, but I hope.
16:31
Speaker 2: It's not right as well. But I definitely think there's
16:35
Speaker 2: big changes coming in terms of people being aware of
16:39
Speaker 2: the choices that they're making with different governments and things
16:41
Speaker 2: like that. I think we may have taken for granted
16:45
Speaker 2: a lot of our current freedoms.
16:46
Speaker 1: Yes, that's what I think too. I think there's big
16:48
Speaker 1: changes coming, particularly by like twenty and thirty. I think
16:51
Speaker 1: we'll be living very differently and our kids will have
16:54
Speaker 1: a different upbringing in to what we've had. And I
16:56
Speaker 1: think it does come down to the freedom that we've had,
16:58
Speaker 1: but it'll be done in a very slow fed way
17:01
Speaker 1: that it just Yeah, I know, I know, You're always
17:07
Speaker 1: welcome back. I love chatting with you. Thank you so
17:09
Speaker 1: much time. Where can we find you? Anyone that wants
17:11
Speaker 1: to connect with you?
17:12
Speaker 2: Easiest ways through Instagram and I am at katie four
17:15
Speaker 2: dot com dot au and I'm always on there and
17:18
Speaker 2: popping up. So I would love to connect with your community.
17:20
Speaker 2: Oh we're in it. Yeah, i'd love to connect with
17:23
Speaker 2: your community.
17:24
Speaker 1: Oh, thank you so much for joining us, and I
17:26
Speaker 1: hope you have a beautiful Christmas.
17:27
Speaker 2: I'm sure we'll talk to you anyway, See you later