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Power of Giving 2/7: The Courage to be Imperfect on Any Given Tuesday · Dr. Derek H. Suite MD - The SuiteSpot

• 0:06
  Speaker 1: Hey there, welcome.
• 0:07
  Speaker 1: Welcome back to the Sweet Spot.
• 0:09
  Speaker 1: This is Take Action Tuesday.
• 0:11
  Speaker 1: I'm Dr Sweet and, for those of you who don't know me, I'm a board-certified psychiatrist who specializes in sports and performance.
• 0:20
  Speaker 1: I have helped many world-class athletes and top executives break through mental barriers and take decisive action in moments of conflict and crisis.
• 0:32
  Speaker 1: Here's what I've learned Clarity comes from movement, not just thinking.
• 0:39
  Speaker 1: I used to believe that clarity and decisive action was all about thinking.
• 0:44
  Speaker 1: It's actually a bit of both.
• 0:47
  Speaker 1: You've got to take action and move for something to happen.
• 0:51
  Speaker 1: In fact, albert Einstein's favorite quote of mine is nothing happens until something moves.
• 1:00
  Speaker 1: Nothing happens until something moves.
• 1:03
  Speaker 1: Nothing happens until something moves.
• 1:08
  Speaker 1: So today, on take action tuesday, we're turning thoughts into action, and our theme this week is around the power of giving.
• 1:11
  Speaker 1: Yesterday, in making moves monday, we spoke about the power of giving giving to yourself as the very first thing you do when you wake up in the morning, filling your own cup as the first giving thing that you can do so that you can be in a position to give to others.
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: Today, take Action Tuesday, I've got a story that might just change the way you think about and face your next big challenge.
• 1:39
  Speaker 1: Let's go, let's get started.
• 1:41
  Speaker 1: Let's go, let's get started.
• 1:49
  Speaker 1: Well, you know, a few years ago I worked with a successful film actor who had found himself facing what felt to be an impossible task, or wall for him, as he put it.
• 1:56
  Speaker 1: He'd been cast in a Broadway show, a dream role.
• 2:01
  Speaker 1: But there was just one problem he was paralyzed by stage fright.
• 2:07
  Speaker 1: You see, for film actors it's a little different than being with stage actors.
• 2:13
  Speaker 1: Right On the stage, you have the immediacy of live theater, the challenge of unforgiving lights, an audience that's sitting right there.
• 2:23
  Speaker 1: It was rather overwhelming for him, but here's where it got interesting.
• 2:29
  Speaker 1: One night I suggested something simple but powerful let's just go to the theater.
• 2:36
  Speaker 1: I said, no pressure, just you and me and an empty stage and the lights on.
• 2:42
  Speaker 1: And I talked him into allowing me to have one friend who was a critic or acted like a critic, to sit in the audience.
• 2:52
  Speaker 1: Just one person watching.
• 2:54
  Speaker 1: Now, this is where most people think success stories take off with some magical transformation, and I wish I could have told you that it went beautifully because we did that.
• 3:06
  Speaker 1: But that's not what happened.
• 3:08
  Speaker 1: What happened was more real and more powerful.
• 3:13
  Speaker 1: Even this accomplished actor gave himself the permission to be a beginner again and make mistakes.
• 3:21
  Speaker 1: He gave himself the space to feel uncomfortable, to have to start over several times.
• 3:26
  Speaker 1: He also gave himself the right to practice without judgment.
• 3:33
  Speaker 1: And that's what it took several nights.
• 3:35
  Speaker 1: And notice, I mentioned three types of giving.
• 3:41
  Speaker 1: One, he gave himself permission to be a beginner.
• 3:45
  Speaker 1: Two, he gave himself the space to feel uncomfortable.
• 3:49
  Speaker 1: And three, he gave himself the right to continue to practice without judgment.
• 3:57
  Speaker 1: You see, we often think taking action means making some bold, perfect move.
• 4:02
  Speaker 1: Maybe, yeah, it does at times, but sometimes the most powerful action is giving yourself permission to take the small steps each night as we return to that stage.
• 4:17
  Speaker 1: Each time he gave himself a little more grace, a little more trust.
• 4:23
  Speaker 1: He became stronger and stronger, and I watched it happen.
• 4:27
  Speaker 1: For him, it took time, and here's what I want you to take away from this Before you can take action on something that you are tackling or facing, you need to give yourself three things Permission to be imperfect, space to practice and patience with the process.
• 4:56
  Speaker 1: Let me say those three things again Permission, give yourself, give All right.
• 5:02
  Speaker 1: This is Take Action.
• 5:03
  Speaker 1: Tuesday.
• 5:03
  Speaker 1: We're talking about the power of giving and we're saying right now that you've got to give yourself permission to be imperfect, give yourself the space to practice and then give yourself patience with the process.
• 5:20
  Speaker 1: So I want you to try this Next time you're facing your own stage Whether it's a presentation, a difficult conversation, maybe it's a challenge that feels overwhelming Give yourself permission to rehearse in the small ways my actor friend did.
• 5:36
  Speaker 1: Take imperfect action and then show up for yourself.
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: Show up for yourself first.
• 5:42
  Speaker 1: That's a concept.
• 5:44
  Speaker 1: So, my actor friend, what happened with him?
• 5:48
  Speaker 1: He actually went on to have an incredible Broadway performance and, yes, I did get a complimentary ticket or two, but look, he didn't succeed because he was just amazing.
• 6:04
  Speaker 1: He conquered his fear.
• 6:06
  Speaker 1: And he didn't conquer it completely, he still was a bit jittery, but he learned to give himself what he needed to take action in spite of the fear.
• 6:18
  Speaker 1: And there's a book that I read a while back Goodness, I can't remember the author but the name of the book.
• 6:23
  Speaker 1: You can look it up.
• 6:24
  Speaker 1: It's called Feel the Fear, but do it anyway.
• 6:28
  Speaker 1: And that's a great book.
• 6:31
  Speaker 1: Feel the fear, but do it anyway.
• 6:33
  Speaker 1: You know that's about.
• 6:34
  Speaker 1: It's about taking action no matter how you feel, and and that, recognizing that the fear is not your enemy, fear might just be the catalyst that you need.
• 6:47
  Speaker 1: So, yeah, if you are going through something, I want you to remember that concept.
• 6:53
  Speaker 1: Feel the fear and do it anyway, and that's how you will get through it.
• 7:00
  Speaker 1: Go pick up that book.
• 7:01
  Speaker 1: It's a great book.
• 7:03
  Speaker 1: I apologize that I don't remember the author.
• 7:05
  Speaker 1: I think it might be her first name might be Susan Susan Jeffries, dr Susan Jeffries, but don't quote me on that, all right.
• 7:14
  Speaker 1: So remember every great performance starts with a simple decision to show up.
• 7:22
  Speaker 1: I want you to give yourself that gift today.
• 7:26
  Speaker 1: That's how you move forward.
• 7:29
  Speaker 1: That's the giving that you have to do.
• 7:32
  Speaker 1: Give yourself the chance to be imperfect, give yourself the chance to practice and give yourself the chance to make it happen.
• 7:41
  Speaker 1: Slowly Doesn't always have to be magic.
• 7:44
  Speaker 1: All right, until next time, keep taking action and keep giving to yourself.
• 7:50
  Speaker 1: This is, dr Sweet.
• 7:51
  Speaker 1: We're working on the power of giving and you are in the sweet spot.
• 7:56
  Speaker 1: Thank you.