Latest / Camp Classics / Madame Web (2024)

Transcript

Madame Web (2024) · Camp Classics

• 0:00
  Hope the spiders were worth it. Mom Get.
• 0:02
  Away from her, you bitch. Classic.
• 0:07
  He was in the Amazon with my mom when she was researching spiders
• 0:11
  right before she died. No.
• 0:15
  Hannah, I thought you become a prostitute or a GOG at it.
• 0:20
  I used to love doggy chow. I used to love doggy chow too.
• 0:26
  The best thing about this podcast?
• 0:29
  It hasn't happened yet. I'm Crystal.
• 0:32
  Enough, your voice is drilling into my skull.
• 0:36
  I need to think. I think I've actually delivered
• 0:38
  that with way too much. Let me just go back again.
• 0:42
  OK? Let me just get my decoter on.
• 0:44
  OK. Enough.
• 0:46
  Your voice is drilling into my skull.
• 0:48
  I need to think better. Maybe still too much energy.
• 0:52
  Wait, I'm just going to. Right?
• 0:53
  I've got bangs. I'm beautiful enough.
• 0:57
  Your voice is drilling into my skull.
• 0:59
  I need to think I'm baby lame. And welcome to Camp Classics, A
• 1:04
  thoughtful podcast about stupid movies.
• 1:09
  And wow, we're going to have to be extra thoughtful for today
• 1:12
  because I don't think they get much stupider.
• 1:15
  It's it's pretty stupid, isn't it?
• 1:18
  And that says a lot for a film. A superhero film really does.
• 1:22
  When you are starting to question the plot in a superhero
• 1:25
  film, I think you have a big issue, don't you?
• 1:28
  Yeah, when you're really like, I don't think this makes sense in
• 1:33
  a movie about spider powers. Every two weeks we are here
• 1:38
  discussing, exploring, raiding, some of the peaks and valleys in
• 1:43
  the genre of camp in the search for the campus of camp classics.
• 1:48
  And this week we are covering 2024's Madame Web Bon Appetit.
• 1:55
  Wow, is this our newest? I think this is our newest film
• 1:58
  we've done, isn't it? Yeah, it might be.
• 2:00
  What did this come out after? Love lies, bleeding.
• 2:03
  Yeah, yeah. Yeah, it did.
• 2:05
  Yeah. I think it did.
• 2:06
  Oh, look at us, Karen. Karen, it's only it's only a
• 2:09
  year old. And you know what it was
• 2:12
  actually, it's Dakota's last movie.
• 2:13
  She's got 1 coming out, but yeah, ever.
• 2:16
  She's been pretty quiet since, hasn't she?
• 2:19
  She needed a break. Bless her God, this one really
• 2:22
  put her through it. You.
• 2:24
  Pushed me down the stairs. We have a gay Tron where for
• 2:28
  only £4 you can get a bonus episode every month and access
• 2:32
  to our growing back catalog of camp classics.
• 2:36
  Our last gay Tron episode was on Basic Instinct 2.
• 2:39
  Risk addiction. Now that's a movie.
• 2:42
  That's a that's a movie, people that has a plot.
• 2:46
  It has an actress. Yeah, similar to this one, I
• 2:50
  would say it also has a plot and an actress.
• 2:52
  There you go. And some high speed chases.
• 2:56
  Well, yeah, I'd also as well. Imagine if you had Sharon Stone
• 3:01
  as Catherine Trammell chasing you.
• 3:02
  She'd fucking hunt you down. Oh yeah, that would get you.
• 3:05
  That would be much. Well then, then we're back in
• 3:07
  the Catwoman universe. Yeah, we'll this is what I'm
• 3:13
  learning. Everything links to the Catwoman
• 3:15
  universe. This movie is definitely in the
• 3:17
  Catwoman. Universe, hello to the stray
• 3:19
  cat. I was like, is she Catwoman?
• 3:22
  And did you notice? Sorry, we'll get to it.
• 3:24
  Sorry, yeah, but basically everything comes back to our
• 3:27
  first ever episode. Catwoman.
• 3:29
  Yeah, Cat Classics, Revolver and Catwoman.
• 3:31
  There is a big multi universe space around Catwoman.
• 3:34
  We're learning. Yeah, Sony, stop chickening out.
• 3:36
  Release the Catwoman universe. I mean, I mean, it's probably
• 3:43
  not the worst idea because they're like throwing them out
• 3:45
  there now, aren't they? They're all like it's turning
• 3:47
  into a sack of shit, these these superhero multiverses, aren't
• 3:53
  they? I used to be very religious
• 3:56
  about watching all superhero movies because I was a huge
• 3:59
  comic books fan as a kid. Like huge.
• 4:02
  And so when superhero movies started getting made, I was
• 4:05
  like, it is my duty to encourage this industry because I was just
• 4:08
  so appreciative that a thing that I loved that was kind of
• 4:11
  underground had become mainstream.
• 4:13
  And I was like when the X-Men started to being big, I was so
• 4:17
  stoked. So I've seen basically every
• 4:18
  Marvel movie. I'm I'm really falling bad.
• 4:20
  I don't think I've lost, watched the last like 5 releases.
• 4:23
  But what What's been the last like, successful one?
• 4:27
  The last success? I mean, I know they I know they
• 4:29
  all kind of gross like, but well.
• 4:31
  Morbius was a huge flop. This is also in the spider
• 4:34
  universe. Craven the Hunter, I think flop.
• 4:36
  Yeah, even though he's so fit. So fit.
• 4:39
  Oh my God, I haven't seen. I haven't seen either of them.
• 4:41
  Is he the fittest person to front one of these superhero
• 4:45
  films so far? Aaron Taylor, What's it?
• 4:49
  Yeah, he's welfare. He sounds like David Beckham
• 4:52
  though, which is a big boner kill straight away.
• 4:54
  So that's right, everyone boner kill.
• 4:57
  I. Haven't watched the last venom.
• 5:01
  The Marvel Marvels was a a flop I think.
• 5:03
  Yeah, flaccid. Yeah, we're in the we're in the
• 5:06
  flaccid era for superheroes. Let's look actually, what are
• 5:10
  the next big ones? What are the ones?
• 5:11
  Thunderbolts is the next one coming out and I'm I'm
• 5:14
  cautiously optimistic about that.
• 5:16
  And what about like, what about the DC universe?
• 5:19
  Because they've they've got to shit as well.
• 5:21
  That they were never, they were never good.
• 5:23
  But yeah, they did get shitter. But Batman?
• 5:26
  I like the Batman films. Oh right, I thought you meant
• 5:29
  them like Justice League. Well, Oh yeah, that was shit,
• 5:33
  Wasn't. It Wonder Woman bad.
• 5:34
  Oh, it's What about Fantastic Four?
• 5:37
  Is that coming? Yeah, that'll Fantastic Four, I
• 5:39
  think has potential and I think Thunderbolts will be good.
• 5:42
  OK. All right.
• 5:44
  OK. We'll see.
• 5:45
  We'll see. Anyway, yeah, that's not why
• 5:48
  we're here. No.
• 5:50
  What was I going to say? Oh, yeah, We were talking about
• 5:53
  the Gatreon. I was just going to say you
• 5:54
  should subscribe to the Gatreon because it helps us out.
• 5:59
  Help me, I'm poor. And you can now do that directly
• 6:02
  on your Apple or Spotify feeds. You can click on the locked
• 6:06
  episode and I think you can get a free trial so you can try
• 6:09
  before you buy. And also as well, you can just
• 6:11
  DM me your bank details and I can just sort it out for you as
• 6:15
  well. She won't take more than she's.
• 6:17
  Due No, exactly no. I just think sometimes I think,
• 6:19
  you know, it can be a lot of effort doing all of these
• 6:21
  subscriptions. So just send me a picture of
• 6:23
  your card and I'll happily. Deal with front and back.
• 6:27
  Yeah, and signatures as well would be great.
• 6:29
  And any extra pins, codes, passwords that you might use
• 6:34
  across all of your accounts useful.
• 6:38
  We've had a couple new Patreon subscribers, some on Apple
• 6:43
  Podcasts, but thanks, I presume to GDPRI cannot see what your
• 6:47
  names are, so thank you anonymous folks.
• 6:50
  Oh, they like that. They like sticking anonymous, do
• 6:52
  they? They like playing that one in
• 6:53
  the corner. And we've also had Hugh who
• 6:56
  signed up on Patreons. Thank you.
• 6:57
  Everyone. Is that Hugh Grant?
• 6:59
  I I think it's huge ass. Oh, OK, OK, don't know who that
• 7:03
  is, but. If you're not in a position to
• 7:05
  subscribe to the gay Tron, well, I can see your future and you
• 7:11
  giving a five star rating on whatever platform you're
• 7:14
  listening on. See what you did there?
• 7:16
  Madam Web tie in. That was about as successful as
• 7:19
  the film as well that time. What movie should we cover next?
• 7:23
  You could follow us on Instagram at Camp Classics Podcast and
• 7:27
  message us with your suggestions.
• 7:28
  And we have had Cliff get in touch with a suggestion Cliff
• 7:33
  has said, can I suggest Poltergeist 3 to be added to the
• 7:36
  list? Laura Flynn, Boyle, Tangina, the
• 7:39
  name Carol Ann shouted every 3 seconds and the most 80s setting
• 7:43
  of a shopping mall turned tower block.
• 7:45
  I mean, sounds sounds promising. I mean that that does sound
• 7:48
  promising and I guess at some point we better take one of
• 7:50
  these suggestions as well. We get to have done it so far.
• 7:54
  Yeah, thank you. Well, Cliff, it's on the list.
• 7:58
  I haven't seen any of the Poltergeist movies, have you?
• 8:00
  Yeah, a long time ago but I just remember like the the key bits
• 8:04
  like the girl levitating I think.
• 8:06
  But I get very confused because Emma Bunton did it in the Too
• 8:09
  Much video from the Spice Girls. Too much.
• 8:12
  No seriously, there's a bit where she is in a nightie on a
• 8:16
  bed and telekinesis and things going around her based on
• 8:20
  Poltergeist for the Too Much single.
• 8:23
  That's for her little setup, looking at everyone, I swear to
• 8:25
  God. Now I'm just picturing Emma
• 8:29
  Bunton crawling down the stairs with her head swiveling
• 8:32
  backwards. Fuck me, fuck me, fuck me, fuck
• 8:37
  me. That was Jerry.
• 8:41
  I can't wait. Actually, Jerry Halliwells, you
• 8:44
  know, she's the Harry Potter RIP off books that she's done Rose
• 8:47
  past or whatever. Apparently she's just insult
• 8:50
  them to get movie rights for them.
• 8:52
  So there you go. That's one to look forward to
• 8:54
  down the line. Tori Potter.
• 8:57
  Yeah, fucking grim. Oh God, I forget.
• 8:59
  You and Jerry go back, don't you?
• 9:01
  Yeah, let's not get into it. I'm not giving her any more her
• 9:05
  time. Isn't it the best?
• 9:07
  Baby, before we go any further, what makes a camp classic?
• 9:12
  Well, actually, Crystal, I thought in keeping with this,
• 9:17
  this episode and that we're doing Madden Web and I don't
• 9:20
  know if you recall in the film, there's quite a lot of
• 9:22
  questionable dubbing. So I was wondering if we could
• 9:26
  maybe get some sort of AI machine to tap in.
• 9:31
  Could you just start, could you just tap in a couple of codes,
• 9:34
  please? I think, I think it's going to
• 9:35
  generate. There you go.
• 9:37
  Tap, tap. Tap.
• 9:38
  Tap. Tap.
• 9:39
  Tap. Tap.
• 9:40
  Tap a camp classic. Unlike Queer Joy, has an ongoing
• 9:46
  legacy, informs pop culture, is stupid fun, and has underdog
• 9:54
  flopped by. So there we go.
• 9:57
  Oh, did you believe? That you were in the room?
• 10:00
  Yeah. What's your history with this
• 10:04
  movie? Well, I saw it in the cinema by
• 10:08
  myself. Yeah, I was.
• 10:11
  I was doing a Circus of Horrors tour and I was just going all
• 10:15
  around to like the regions in the UK and I just would find
• 10:18
  myself with like nothing to do in the day times and then
• 10:21
  literally frantically search for any kind of cinema nearby and
• 10:25
  then just see whatever was on it.
• 10:27
  And that was that was on it. And I was there and there were
• 10:29
  two older women there and we all had a lovely time, chuckling all
• 10:31
  the way through it to be honest. Oh great.
• 10:33
  What about you? Yeah, I start with Frida slaves
• 10:37
  and I had a lovely time. It was so funny.
• 10:40
  It was just, it was a cinematic experience.
• 10:43
  I feel you had to be there. You had to be in the room.
• 10:45
  You had to feel the stupidity coming at you in like full
• 10:49
  screen vibes. It was so fun.
• 10:51
  I can't remember the last time I, I think a movie was this
• 10:55
  celebrated for being bad in a, in a, in the queer community.
• 10:58
  Yeah. And whenever that happens, I'm,
• 11:01
  I'm sat down, I've got my ticket.
• 11:03
  Yeah, did you know about the fallout with Dakota before
• 11:07
  viewing it? What fallout is that?
• 11:09
  Well, that she hated everything about this movie.
• 11:13
  I was, I think we were starting to get a sense of it because I
• 11:15
  think I saw it after she did that interview where the the
• 11:19
  person asked her about her mom dying in the spiders in the
• 11:22
  Amazon thing. He was in the Amazon with my mom
• 11:26
  when she was researching spiders right before she died.
• 11:29
  And she was like, what's funny about that line?
• 11:31
  Oh yeah, she's it. She just like it.
• 11:32
  Sounds like a basic plot device to me.
• 11:34
  Yeah. I mean, isn't every line out of
• 11:36
  context out of context? I mean, that is factual though,
• 11:41
  isn't it? It is.
• 11:41
  Factual. I mean, it's hard to ask someone
• 11:44
  about. So why does this movie seem so
• 11:46
  shit? And that's what he wanted to
• 11:50
  say, but he couldn't say it. And so he asked it in the wrong
• 11:53
  way. And she was like, well, you
• 11:54
  didn't say it. But there's just this weird
• 11:56
  like, because I, I did a bit of a deep dive today and I, if
• 11:58
  anyone else has got a couple of hours to just throw themselves
• 12:01
  into, I would suggest you watch every single junket that she's
• 12:05
  done covering this film. Because there is this weird
• 12:07
  tension, isn't there? Where it's like all of the
• 12:10
  interviewers want to ask those questions like, why is this so
• 12:14
  terrible? And at the same time, Dakotas,
• 12:16
  like they're trying not to be like, I fucking hate everything.
• 12:20
  But there's that all of this subtext because it's like
• 12:22
  they're asking the generic questions about how fabulous it
• 12:25
  is. And there she is pretending she
• 12:27
  knows about the Marvel Universe, pretending she gives a shit.
• 12:30
  And it's just, it's, it's kind of poetry.
• 12:32
  And I think for me, I, I was really aware of the fallout and
• 12:36
  how it was all kind of collapsing.
• 12:38
  So I went in and it just gave me like, I don't know if I would
• 12:41
  have felt differently about like her performance, but I, I knew
• 12:45
  from the get go how much she hated it and it just made me
• 12:47
  kind of view and read everything a little bit.
• 12:50
  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, you go in kind of thinking
• 12:54
  surely she's not going to like Dakota Johnson her whole way
• 12:57
  through this movie. And then she does.
• 12:59
  And the the more deadpan she is, the more I I loved it.
• 13:04
  Have you seen her in any other movies?
• 13:05
  I don't. Think so?
• 13:07
  No, I I'm mostly familiar with her.
• 13:10
  For destroying Ellen's career, yeah.
• 13:14
  Actually, no, that's not the truth, Ellen.
• 13:16
  You were invited. And for her thing about Limes?
• 13:20
  Oh yeah, when she did the AD. Yeah.
• 13:24
  And again, I love limes. I love limes, I love them,
• 13:28
  they're great. I love them so much and I like
• 13:30
  to present them like this in my house.
• 13:32
  Destroying that isn't she? She just doesn't play the
• 13:34
  fucking game, does she? She literally just like they put
• 13:37
  them now. I didn't know what to do.
• 13:38
  I'm actually allergic to lions. It's like, OK, Dakota, there are
• 13:43
  a lot, there are a lot of things about her personality, like you
• 13:45
  said, destroying Ellen DeGeneres career that I quite respect with
• 13:49
  her. And then I, I do often, you
• 13:50
  know, I'm watching her interviews.
• 13:52
  I'm like, she, she seems pretty cool and just like I'm bothered.
• 13:55
  But then I think about the fact that she's going out of Chris
• 13:58
  Martin, and that just makes me hate everything about her.
• 14:01
  I don't think you can trust someone that goes out with Chris
• 14:02
  Martin. Yeah, she's kind of.
• 14:04
  I feel like she's like straight people's Aubrey Plaza.
• 14:08
  Yes, yes. Aubrey Plaza is also very
• 14:12
  chaotic, but there's something gay about.
• 14:15
  Her. Yeah.
• 14:16
  Aubrey Palsa hasn't been fully embraced by the straight
• 14:18
  community just because she's just that little bit too
• 14:21
  difficult. She's the person you'd have at a
• 14:23
  dinner party that would destroy it, but you kind of enjoy it.
• 14:26
  Do you know what I mean? Yeah, I just, I was thinking
• 14:28
  about her with Chris Martin today.
• 14:29
  And then I just Googled to see what they were up to, if they
• 14:31
  were still together. And apparently, like, it was
• 14:33
  just, like, the trashiest article.
• 14:35
  But apparently Chris Martin is stopping her from having more
• 14:38
  sexy film roles. Oh no.
• 14:42
  I don't really believe that either.
• 14:45
  A what? So she wants to be making more
• 14:47
  50 Shades of Grey movies. No, but she hated doing those
• 14:50
  too, of course. She hates everything.
• 14:52
  Yeah, she she doesn't. She doesn't need the work.
• 14:56
  She's third generation, nepo baby.
• 14:59
  Third generation. Her parents, what?
• 15:02
  Melanie Griffiths and Don Johnson.
• 15:04
  Her stepfather is Antonio Banderas.
• 15:06
  She's married to the lead singer from Cowboy, who are probably
• 15:09
  one of the most successful. Are they married?
• 15:11
  Are engaged? Are they?
• 15:12
  Engaged. Yeah, they're engaged.
• 15:14
  They've been together a long time as well.
• 15:16
  And then her grandmother is Tippy Hedren from The Birds.
• 15:19
  I did not know that. So she's third generation nepo
• 15:21
  baby. She like she could never work
• 15:24
  again and be absolutely fine. So the fact that she keeps doing
• 15:26
  movies that are apparently very unpleasant for her to be making
• 15:30
  is really funny. It just.
• 15:32
  Kind of makes you wonder what what brings her joy.
• 15:34
  Do you know what I mean? But I, I just was thinking about
• 15:37
  her, her and Goop and Chris Martin because they're all like,
• 15:40
  they're kind of that open family relationships and stuff.
• 15:43
  And I'm like, oh God, imagine, Imagine hanging out at Goop's
• 15:47
  house with Chris Martin and that's sack of sad potatoes,
• 15:50
  Dakota. Gwyneth has also famously done
• 15:54
  superhero movies and you get you're like why is Gwyneth here
• 15:58
  kept enjoying this? Do you think Gwyneth gave her
• 16:01
  one of her candles is like a Christmas present?
• 16:03
  That would be such a little Conti thing to do wouldn't it be
• 16:06
  like here we go, here's my new life, Smell my vagina in your
• 16:09
  bedroom while you're making love to my ex-husband.
• 16:12
  You bitch, I can smell your nappy pussy.
• 16:17
  I love the smell of Gwen's vagina when I'm having sex.
• 16:21
  I love limes. I like to fill my house with it.
• 16:24
  There you go. That's a bit insight into
• 16:26
  Crystal, everybody. I know what you were going to
• 16:28
  ask in a second and have I done a quiz?
• 16:30
  And well, no, because I was in the in the mind of Dakota, I
• 16:33
  frankly couldn't be asked with this film.
• 16:35
  Fine. So there we go.
• 16:37
  OK, great. Moving on, there will be no quiz
• 16:40
  today. But I did look at her Instagram
• 16:42
  to try and work out who she was showbiz friends with.
• 16:44
  Yeah, she only follows 75 people.
• 16:47
  Oh, anyone good? Let's have a look now.
• 16:51
  But yeah, I. Feel like we could.
• 16:52
  We've got time to list them all, frankly. 75 people.
• 16:56
  Let me go through because again, a lot of them aren't famous
• 16:58
  people so let me just let me go. So she has 6.7 million viewers
• 17:04
  herself. The only thing she's really
• 17:06
  posting about is her tea time book club every month.
• 17:09
  Oh God, boring. OK and who does she follow?
• 17:13
  She follows don't Chi Elton John.
• 17:16
  OK. Portal A paints.
• 17:20
  Paint a paint supplier. A paint supplier.
• 17:23
  She follows NASA. Who else does she follow?
• 17:29
  She follows the Tate. There you go.
• 17:34
  This is culture. OK, OK, I'm I'm full.
• 17:38
  I take back what I said about gay.
• 17:40
  Oh, and Greta Thunberg. And that's basically it.
• 17:45
  Dochi, NASA, Greta Tunberg, a paint supplier and the Tate.
• 17:50
  That is wild. Imagine her feed.
• 17:54
  It's. Just like, yeah, that's it
• 17:58
  basically. That's really, really fab.
• 18:03
  What? A confusing character she is.
• 18:06
  OK, great. Well, I've got some some context
• 18:09
  for this movie. I've got some box office and
• 18:11
  reviews. This movie made $100 million at
• 18:15
  the box office, which sounds like a lot of money, but is also
• 18:19
  unfortunately a huge bomb. It probably lost Sony something
• 18:22
  like 50 to $100 million, so. That sounds like a made-up
• 18:27
  number, by the way. 50 to $100. Oh, right.
• 18:30
  Between 50 and 100. Oh, OK, Because that's like 50
• 18:33
  to $100 does not sound like a real.
• 18:35
  That isn't a real number. The limit does not exist.
• 18:39
  It's got 11% on Rotten Tomatoes, which is real bad.
• 18:42
  Up there with some of the worst that we've covered, I'd say.
• 18:45
  Yeah, it was nominated for six Razzies, which we always love to
• 18:50
  see. How did it do?
• 18:51
  And it won. It won worst picture, worst
• 18:55
  actress and worst screenplay. Yes.
• 18:58
  Did she, did she go to it? I don't think she went.
• 19:01
  No, of course she didn't. She's not like a Halle Berry, is
• 19:03
  she? She's.
• 19:03
  Not a Halle Berry, but yeah, Halle Berry going to the Razzies
• 19:08
  with her Oscar is truly some iconic shit.
• 19:13
  That's how you do it. That's how you do it.
• 19:14
  I've got this quote from Kevin Mayer of The Times, who said
• 19:18
  this movie represented the death of the superhero genre, the
• 19:22
  burning of the superhero genre to the ground, and then the
• 19:25
  returning in the middle of the night to piss on the Super
• 19:27
  genre's ashes. So that kind of sums up how the
• 19:33
  critics felt about this movie, which again, only makes me love
• 19:36
  it a little bit more. Yeah, absolutely.
• 19:39
  Yeah, absolutely. So I just skipped to the end,
• 19:42
  but I mean, we've, I think we've ticked our underdog plot vibes.
• 19:46
  Totally. OK, well, should we get into the
• 19:49
  plot? Yeah, no, yeah.
• 19:52
  Yeah, I've actually, I'm sorry to say, but I've gone into too
• 19:55
  much detail on the plot, but it's because there's so many
• 19:58
  lines that I just really want to include in this podcast.
• 20:01
  So anyway you can just tell me to speed it up if I need?
• 20:03
  I might need to because I'm viewing this for a second time.
• 20:07
  It wasn't quite as punchy a movie as I recalled it being so.
• 20:12
  I all of my notes have exclamation marks in them.
• 20:15
  I just couldn't believe that. I couldn't believe that line got
• 20:18
  said. I can't but I couldn't believe
• 20:20
  it got said and in some cases it got said twice because it had to
• 20:22
  be re dubbed. Oh yeah, or God knows what they
• 20:24
  were saying in the re dubbing. Yeah, OK.
• 20:27
  So we've got a research team in the Amazon rainforest in Peru,
• 20:31
  led by a pregnant Constance Webb in 1973.
• 20:34
  She's looking for a spider with rare healing properties, got a
• 20:38
  crazy info dump and yeah, minutes, and we're getting some
• 20:41
  of the worst dialogue that I think you may have ever heard in
• 20:43
  a movie. They really don't signpost the
• 20:46
  the areas very well, do they? Like nothing about it is sort of
• 20:49
  saying 70s to me. Oh, she had that analogue
• 20:52
  camera. Oh, I didn't notice.
• 20:54
  Oh. Sorry.
• 20:56
  OK. And she had that.
• 20:58
  She had that journal. She was writing by hand.
• 21:01
  It was the 70s, yes. I remember it well, yeah.
• 21:03
  Yeah, Ezekiel Sims, the man Constant hired for protection
• 21:07
  and security but praise her, claims the spider for himself
• 21:11
  and shoots her before fleeing with the spider and leaving
• 21:15
  Constance to die. Constance is rescued, sort of by
• 21:19
  an indigenous tribe. And that that whole thing is
• 21:23
  giving like AI nightmare right there.
• 21:25
  Oh God. When he's, when he's in the pool
• 21:27
  and when he's. In the pool.
• 21:29
  Oh, the pool, yeah. Like AI has generated this image
• 21:32
  and I don't know what the prompt has been but it looks fucking
• 21:35
  atrocious. They they get one of the spiders
• 21:38
  to bite her at, but unfortunately she dies shortly
• 21:40
  after giving birth to her daughter Cassandra.
• 21:43
  Then we skip forward 30 years and Cassandra, now going by
• 21:46
  Cassie, works as a paramedic in New York City.
• 21:49
  It's unclear how she got out of rainforest.
• 21:54
  Yeah, well, doesn't she say I didn't?
• 21:56
  Don't they say the foster care didn't do her wrong or
• 21:59
  something? I don't.
• 22:00
  Yeah, I don't. I'm just not sure why like the
• 22:03
  spider tribe that gave her spider powers didn't raise her.
• 22:07
  The other thing I didn't understand, and we're skipping
• 22:09
  forward, is I didn't when she went back to see him while he
• 22:12
  was dressed like an art teacher. I didn't really.
• 22:14
  Get that I know. Why are you not wearing your
• 22:17
  indigenous spidery outfit? No, it didn't make any sense.
• 22:22
  Right. So she's a paramedic in New York
• 22:24
  City. We learned quickly that Cassie
• 22:26
  is not like the other girls. She's mean.
• 22:30
  It's also our first CPR scene, of which I promise there will be
• 22:35
  many. Yes, in fact, more than you will
• 22:38
  believe at this point. They get to the hospital, a
• 22:40
  nurse comes over and this is a great line.
• 22:42
  The nurse says to Cassie, she's going to be OK.
• 22:45
  And Cassie says who? And this is our first indication
• 22:51
  of us learning that Cassie does not give a shit about any human
• 22:55
  life. She she is responsible for a lot
• 22:57
  of death in this movie. She really is.
• 22:59
  And it's just like, yeah. And again, the nonchalance that
• 23:03
  that she has with everything because.
• 23:05
  She doesn't give a fuck. But then I was wondering, I was
• 23:07
  like, well, maybe that's the training of being a paramedic in
• 23:10
  New York City. You've got to be steely focused.
• 23:13
  You can't be letting emotions get in your way.
• 23:14
  And I was actually maybe this is a real character study from
• 23:18
  Dakota Johnson in who this person.
• 23:20
  Is Oh, she actually spent time on the words, like seeing the
• 23:24
  callousness of those people risking their lives to save
• 23:28
  others. Also, she never had a mother
• 23:30
  figure in her life, so yeah. Well, that will, yeah.
• 23:33
  Heaven help any woman without mother figures in.
• 23:36
  Their lives I know exactly, but also as well like her Avengers
• 23:40
  are like why did you hate me so much?
• 23:42
  It's like, give the mother a fucking break, OK?
• 23:45
  Yeah, well, that brings us to the next scene.
• 23:49
  So we've got Cassie looking through her mom's journal at
• 23:51
  home. I only bring up the scene
• 23:52
  because she says. Hope the spiders were worth it,
• 23:55
  mom. She's got a real chip on her
• 23:57
  shoulder about it. Anytime someone disappoints me
• 24:01
  from now on in my life I'm going to say hope the spiders were
• 24:05
  worth it mom, it's so good. I feel like you are quite Dakota
• 24:11
  Johnson, actually, aren't you? I feel like there are some
• 24:14
  similarities here. So that Cassie's on a dangerous
• 24:19
  call, she falls into the water and her heart stops.
• 24:23
  It's a near death experience. Did I die?
• 24:26
  And that's now we're at CPR count 2.
• 24:28
  Yeah, we're about 5 minutes in, just to be clear.
• 24:32
  But yeah, Ben revives. Ben is her partner.
• 24:35
  He revives Cassie with CPR and she begins to experience visions
• 24:39
  of the future, but she's not bothered because she just wants
• 24:42
  to go home and watch Idol. Oh yeah, that's another
• 24:45
  important time stamp. It's the year 2003, everybody.
• 24:48
  So that didn't feel crowbar din at all.
• 24:51
  No, no. She just wants to watch American
• 24:53
  Idol. I was going to say the fact she
• 24:55
  had bangs might have been another stamp as well, but I
• 24:57
  think that's just something that consistently she's always had.
• 25:00
  I wonder what her forehead looks like.
• 25:03
  She does look great in this movie.
• 25:05
  She's stunning. She's so beautiful.
• 25:08
  She's so hot. She also doesn't seem like the
• 25:10
  kind of girl who watches American Idol.
• 25:12
  No. She hates everything too much.
• 25:14
  She. Doesn't she doesn't have any joy
• 25:15
  in her life? Yeah, yeah.
• 25:17
  Anyway, interesting choice. Now, we've got an amazing scene
• 25:21
  with our villain Ezekiel. So he's at the opera for some
• 25:26
  reason, and he seduces. He seduces a woman who, if you
• 25:30
  are watching this on Amazon Prime, you'll know is Jill
• 25:32
  Hennessy, who is billed as Beautiful Woman.
• 25:35
  Big boobs What? No, it's not her character name.
• 25:41
  Beautiful woman doesn't. She work for like.
• 25:44
  Yeah, yeah. She has scenes.
• 25:45
  She has a dialogue. She has.
• 25:46
  She's a no scenes, no name beautiful woman.
• 25:50
  To be fair though, I there are worse things to be cast as like
• 25:54
  do you know what I mean? Like slightly slightly old.
• 25:58
  Yeah, older spy. Yeah.
• 26:02
  Yeah, exactly. They have sex and then Ezekiel
• 26:08
  has a dream of the future where 3 spider women including Sydney
• 26:13
  Sweeney kill him and he says the great line in this dream,
• 26:17
  Where's my spider? They took my spider.
• 26:22
  Also, did you not get like a sight sight bit of excitement
• 26:25
  when you saw that? Because I was kind of like.
• 26:27
  Oh yeah, this is coming. Sure.
• 26:29
  Yeah, I was like, OK, I'm, I was kind of here for it by this
• 26:32
  point, you know, because like, you know, even the, the sort of
• 26:35
  the superhero films that you enjoy, like this is the, it's
• 26:38
  the same sort of fucking territory, isn't it?
• 26:40
  The sort of origin of it and all.
• 26:42
  But then when I saw that much action and kind of different
• 26:45
  female superheroes, I was like, Oh yeah.
• 26:48
  Yeah, this will be fun. I'm looking forward to this
• 26:51
  developing for sure. Spoiler alert, it does not
• 26:55
  develop, no. Not at.
• 26:57
  All there's not going to be a swimming pool, you stupid slut.
• 27:01
  So then he wakes up from his dream and he info dumps his
• 27:04
  entire deal to this lady he's just met.
• 27:07
  And this is where I think we realized that every line the
• 27:10
  villain speaks has been re dumped.
• 27:14
  Every single line. When I tell you that whenever
• 27:18
  this man's mouth is moving, the words do not match like it's, it
• 27:22
  actually has to be seen to be believed.
• 27:24
  It's wild. It's absolutely wild.
• 27:27
  It's giving original Power Rangers reader Repulsa and.
• 27:30
  Like because I was looking into this and it's I think it's
• 27:32
  called like AD. RADR Yeah.
• 27:35
  ADR and it's often used on film sets when you know, if there's
• 27:39
  been an audio defect or they need to re record something or,
• 27:44
  you know, sometimes you might retest audiences need to punch
• 27:47
  up a joke or something. So there are sort of, this is
• 27:50
  quite a common thing in films to kind of redub things and to do a
• 27:53
  bit. It sounds like they fucking
• 27:55
  rewrote the entire plot. Yeah, there are bits where he
• 27:59
  speaks and like the characters just not reacting to react.
• 28:03
  There's separate dialogues going on, isn't there?
• 28:06
  Yeah, it's very, very, very camp.
• 28:11
  It's right now, it's great and you are just like looking at you
• 28:15
  are just watching this going. This is a huge Hollywood
• 28:18
  superhero film. Like this isn't some like Little
• 28:21
  Pony thing that's got no budget. It's like, why are they not
• 28:24
  reshooting this or, or why do they think that's acceptable?
• 28:28
  Have they got to the point in the edit where they're just
• 28:30
  like, oh God, whatever then? Because how many people does
• 28:33
  this need to go through like? This.
• 28:36
  It's the equivalent I remember watching Van Helsing.
• 28:39
  Have you ever seen Van Helsing? But maybe I can't fully
• 28:42
  remember. I remember watching that in
• 28:44
  cinema and you there's many points where you can see a boom
• 28:47
  mic in shot like in the castle with vampires.
• 28:50
  It's the equivalent of that. But.
• 28:52
  This is the thing I just don't understand with this movie as a
• 28:54
  whole. It's like you, anything that is
• 28:57
  made on this scale has to go through so many layers.
• 29:01
  And we know this like anything that's on like a big platform,
• 29:04
  there are multiple levels of people signing off stuff like
• 29:07
  how did how did this start in like the writers room?
• 29:10
  And then how did they get through casting and kind of
• 29:13
  developing it, like storyboarding it, like how does
• 29:17
  this happen? Probably in like 5 to 10 years
• 29:20
  we will get some kind of tell all or documentary into the
• 29:23
  making of this and it'll all become clear.
• 29:25
  But definitely something, something's happened where
• 29:29
  they've had to like redo this entire villain story.
• 29:32
  And I've, I've heard a few things I've heard, I've heard
• 29:36
  that it was they thought it was creepy that he was kind of after
• 29:40
  these girls and they thought it seemed kind of sexual and they
• 29:43
  wanted to make it seem less sexual, OK.
• 29:47
  I've heard that he had a stronger South American accent,
• 29:53
  maybe Peruvian accent, and they thought it seemed racist.
• 29:56
  OK. So they didn't like his the
• 29:59
  accent choice? I've heard that the original
• 30:02
  script was all about him trying to kill an unborn Peter Parker.
• 30:07
  OK. Yeah, yeah.
• 30:08
  Which would explain why the movie focuses so much on the
• 30:11
  unborn Peter Parker, who is not otherwise in this movie, we all
• 30:15
  get. To And it will also explain why.
• 30:18
  What's the name? Julia Roberts's niece is in it.
• 30:20
  Yeah. I was like, Emma Roberts is kind
• 30:22
  of too big to be playing this bit part.
• 30:25
  She's Julia Roberts niece. Yeah.
• 30:27
  God, it's this is a NEPA baby. Fest a NEPA baby fest?
• 30:31
  Yeah, 100%. Oh, she kind of does have like
• 30:35
  suburban Julia Roberts Energy, actually.
• 30:37
  Yeah, definitely, definitely. OK well we'll never know why
• 30:42
  they've re dubbed it probably, but I just wanna say once again
• 30:45
  I would change nothing about this movie.
• 30:50
  Once I realized this was happening I was like Oh my God
• 30:54
  I'm getting so much more from for my money than I ever thought
• 30:56
  possible. Okay, so the villain kills the
• 31:01
  NSA lady. Can I just say something really
• 31:03
  problematic? She deserved to die.
• 31:05
  Okay, sure. Because how fucking obvious was
• 31:08
  it that she was going to pull a gun out of her purse?
• 31:11
  Oh my God, it. Was like, she made such a
• 31:13
  fucking meal of that. I was like, I was like, you are
• 31:15
  clearly in trouble and that's not how you do it.
• 31:19
  And I was like, that was a error.
• 31:21
  And I'm sorry, I know it's problematic, but I was like,
• 31:24
  quite frankly, you deserve to die for that.
• 31:27
  Yeah, poor beautiful woman recipes.
• 31:31
  Well, she was lucky that she didn't know that how she was
• 31:33
  going to die, wasn't she? Yeah, she was.
• 31:36
  How are you poisoning me? Do you think this is probably
• 31:43
  getting too interested in what the plot's trying to do?
• 31:45
  But was she at the opera to try and seduce him to like, was she
• 31:49
  spying on him or was he? Did he like pursue an NSA agent?
• 31:54
  Oh, I just, I just viewed her as beautiful woman.
• 31:57
  I didn't really I. Didn't.
• 31:58
  I didn't really understand what she was, I just know she had
• 32:01
  like a code or something that she gave.
• 32:02
  Yeah, yeah, exactly. Well when you see a beautiful
• 32:05
  woman on screen, like what's the point of of anything else
• 32:08
  really? He's he's killed her to steal
• 32:11
  some NSA technology so that he can use facial recognition
• 32:16
  cutting edge software to find the girls before they can kill
• 32:19
  him. The the three spider woman from
• 32:21
  his future. And that's another thing because
• 32:23
  I know that like they have to do it in this time period to set up
• 32:26
  the Spider Man and stuff. It's kind of not that exciting
• 32:29
  to be like, oh, facial recognition technology.
• 32:33
  It's like, what are we meant? Are we meant to be kind of like
• 32:35
  excited by this kind of how they're going to track them
• 32:38
  down? It's like we're living in a like
• 32:40
  AI nightmare. We're literally months away from
• 32:42
  like Terminator 2, like Skynet or whatever.
• 32:46
  Yeah, yeah, it's real. Just just set it in the present.
• 32:50
  Yeah. Or or have them get tracked down
• 32:53
  in another way that doesn't. But if they did that, would we
• 32:58
  have Joshua Mamet? What's that?
• 33:01
  What's that? Joshua Mamet, that from girls.
• 33:04
  Who's that? Oh, OK.
• 33:07
  I don't. I don't watch girls, but I know
• 33:08
  who you're talking. But I put computer cow because
• 33:11
  she's like such a cow. I loved her though.
• 33:13
  She was spectacular. Oh my God.
• 33:16
  I'm probably saying her name wrong, but I thought.
• 33:19
  You're having a stroke. It's fine.
• 33:21
  Joshua yeah, this is kind of hard to get out anyway.
• 33:25
  What's what was her name? And girls, hang on, Shoshana
• 33:28
  Shosh from Girls. Oh gosh, where are we?
• 33:31
  OK, so that now we've got a scene with Cassie at BBQ slash
• 33:34
  Baby Shower. We've got our third CPR
• 33:37
  mentioned for those keeping track.
• 33:39
  And then we've got Emma Roberts that we've mentioned as Peter
• 33:42
  Parker's mother. She's very pregnant.
• 33:45
  Peter Parker is in her belly. But they don't, they can't say
• 33:48
  that because you can't say Peter Parker or Spider Man or
• 33:53
  anything. You actually have to say Spider
• 33:56
  people. Which is, but I, I appreciated
• 34:00
  Dakota in that scene because I was like, this is me at any kind
• 34:03
  of straight event where it was like, she literally was just
• 34:06
  like, Oh my God, this is hell on earth.
• 34:08
  And then and then those vacuous women who were not remotely
• 34:11
  interested in the fact that her mother died and weren't like,
• 34:14
  oh, how awful for you that was just like, you've destroyed her
• 34:17
  baby shower now. How selfish.
• 34:19
  That's how I felt the first time.
• 34:21
  And then watching it a second time, I was like, why did she
• 34:24
  put in a blank piece of paper during that game where
• 34:27
  everyone's writing on a piece of paper?
• 34:29
  Like, put in a memory of your mother.
• 34:31
  And instead of just not putting in a piece of paper, Dakota
• 34:35
  Johnson puts in a blank piece of paper so that when it gets
• 34:38
  called, everyone's like, oh, well, don't.
• 34:40
  What about you and your mother? And she's gets to say, actually,
• 34:44
  my mother died in childbirth. She's like, no, I don't want to
• 34:51
  be the center of attention. I'll just no, don't make me talk
• 34:54
  about it. I hate talking about it.
• 34:56
  I mean, it's quite a slave move if you ask me.
• 34:59
  I'm like, yeah, let's do it. She's been preparing that,
• 35:02
  hasn't she? It's very like I don't want to
• 35:06
  be in a situation for even a minute where I'm not enjoying.
• 35:08
  She's such a fucking fun sponge as well.
• 35:11
  Like the way she's like, you're destroying the the flavour of
• 35:13
  those burgers. It's like, all right, darling,
• 35:16
  like Jesus that in fact, the only time up until this point,
• 35:20
  the only time she laughs in the movie is when they open the the
• 35:23
  fortune cracker and then he goes oh, and her her fortune isn't
• 35:28
  like it's like hasn't been finished.
• 35:30
  There's a gap and he's like, oh, this place is Prince is broken.
• 35:34
  We definitely can't eat at that Chinese anymore.
• 35:36
  And then she's like, oh, and I was like, that's literally the
• 35:39
  only joy. That doesn't deserve a laugh.
• 35:42
  No, no, what she should have done is laughed right after
• 35:47
  saying my mother actually died in childbirth and just watched
• 35:50
  all of those women react. Yeah, exactly.
• 35:54
  Now we've got a scene set at a fireworks factory.
• 35:57
  Because this movie is like a a kids cartoon, Yes.
• 36:03
  It does make you realize God, it must be dangerous being at a
• 36:06
  fireworks factory like like what can happen at a firework.
• 36:09
  What could happen? One match.
• 36:11
  Yeah, one match. But also apparently a car
• 36:14
  accident. Quite, quite a, quite a risk at
• 36:17
  a fireworks factory. Anyway, we're at the fireworks
• 36:19
  factory. There's something's gone wrong
• 36:22
  and Cassie's doing CPR. So that's our our CPR count 4
• 36:28
  and then she has a vision of her boss O'Neill dying and then he
• 36:33
  dies just like in her vision. She doesn't prevent it, but she
• 36:37
  does try and do CPR on him. So that's CPR count 5 and don't
• 36:42
  worry about the fact that the fireworks factory is on fire.
• 36:47
  We'll get back to it later. Right now it's just a fireworks
• 36:50
  factory on fire. But she died in a car accident.
• 36:54
  It's it's a thing. OK, great.
• 36:56
  OK. So now we've got a scene.
• 36:57
  Yeah. With our villain and our girl
• 36:59
  Shoshana from Girls, which, Yeah, more amazing casting.
• 37:04
  It's like they they were like, who are the most deadpan women
• 37:08
  in show business? We need them for this movie.
• 37:11
  And again, she's so deadpan. I don't quite know what level
• 37:14
  she's meant to be playing at because she's obviously like
• 37:15
  super intelligent, but she's not like kind of mean.
• 37:19
  She's just efficient. Like she's super efficient.
• 37:25
  But then the thing I do appreciate is that she's not
• 37:28
  like flirting with him like because although she is his like
• 37:31
  little lap dog and the thing it's not because she's like, oh,
• 37:34
  you know, I'm going to get with the guy, but then she doesn't.
• 37:39
  She's just efficient. She just seems to be good at the
• 37:41
  technology and I appreciate she's one of the few people
• 37:44
  that's giving me naughties fashion a bit more of what she's
• 37:49
  wearing. Yeah.
• 37:50
  Yeah, she kind of looks like Yeah, if Girls Aloud.
• 37:54
  We're doing a scene set in an office in a music video.
• 37:57
  What I would love to have seen with her character, though, is
• 37:59
  like a section you're, you know, where he's fucking it up or
• 38:02
  something trying to fight Madam Webb.
• 38:03
  And then she has a moment where she's like, oh, for God's sake,
• 38:06
  if you can't do it, I guess I'll have to sort it out.
• 38:09
  And then she's like program some.
• 38:11
  Yeah, and then she's like changing the traffic light.
• 38:13
  Yeah, just like, ha ha, ha, ha ha.
• 38:15
  Fuck you. Yeah.
• 38:16
  Yeah, Like that. She's got a beef with Dakota.
• 38:20
  Yeah. No, we don't actually know what
• 38:22
  happens to her, no. But at least she's got a
• 38:23
  character name. That's one, yeah.
• 38:26
  OK, send Cassie saves a pigeon from dying and she begins to
• 38:30
  believe in her powers. I only bring that up because she
• 38:33
  says to the pigeon. Guess you didn't die after all.
• 38:43
  She goes to Grand Central Station and then she runs into
• 38:46
  the three girls from our baddies vision and then she sees a
• 38:50
  vision of him killing them. Right now, I will say on this
• 38:54
  bit, I actually thought this bit was pretty good in terms of like
• 38:59
  tension. And it was I this was a bit of
• 39:02
  the film that I was actually like, there's a good film in
• 39:04
  this, right, because it was scary and it's kind of
• 39:07
  claustrophobic. And like I felt like you were
• 39:11
  getting a bit of a sense in it, you know, that this sort of the
• 39:14
  the way she could see into the future, but it was really
• 39:16
  violent. And that was interesting what
• 39:18
  you're saying about maybe that it was too, it was too pervy to
• 39:21
  something else because it is a bit like a slasher film.
• 39:24
  And when he's hunting down these girls and and I actually found
• 39:27
  it very stressful and I was I was quite excited by that.
• 39:30
  I mean, it unravels into something that I wasn't excited
• 39:33
  by, but the setup and the premise, I'm like, Oh shit.
• 39:36
  Yeah, so that we, the villains got Spider Man's powers and so
• 39:40
  he's basically evil Spiderman. I think that's like a quite a
• 39:42
  fun concept to be. You're being pursued by evil
• 39:44
  Spiderman and none of these people have any superhuman
• 39:48
  abilities. So it's basically like you just
• 39:50
  have to stay away from the man who can snap your neck, which is
• 39:53
  quite scary and fun. Yeah.
• 39:54
  And like, and also it's like it was pretty brutal seeing him
• 39:57
  attack the girls because it's like, you know, it's in the
• 39:59
  future. He's still attacking teenage
• 40:01
  girls and, like, killing them. And that's quite a hard thing to
• 40:04
  see. And tonally, I don't think
• 40:05
  anything else was giving my adult superhero horror vibes.
• 40:09
  And then suddenly you're like, oh, he's just broken a 15 year
• 40:12
  old girl's neck. It's a bit like.
• 40:15
  But then yeah. Apparently the director said
• 40:20
  that he's supposed to represent toxic masculinity, which is why
• 40:23
  he kills with a poison touch and why toxic by Britney features in
• 40:27
  the movie. And it's so that doesn't work
• 40:31
  quite so well, but you know. Yeah, because he doesn't he
• 40:35
  kill, he doesn't he kill women as well, doesn't he?
• 40:37
  Yeah, and and it's always like a choky thing.
• 40:40
  Yeah, that's I wouldn't believe her if she said to me, get out
• 40:46
  of the carriage. No, it's so I I felt like it was
• 40:50
  almost believable that she got them out of the door just like
• 40:54
  just out of the door, like, you know, oh, we've all got to go.
• 40:57
  And you could kind of get swept along with that.
• 40:59
  But then they continue to stick with her.
• 41:01
  It's very. Weird.
• 41:02
  And then again, because we're not really sure of what we're
• 41:04
  watching at this point, you know, you are like questioning,
• 41:07
  you're like sort of coming in from it from quite a few
• 41:09
  different angles. And you are thinking like, is
• 41:12
  she deciding to play this like more understated and kind of a
• 41:15
  bit because she even says in the film that like she's awkward.
• 41:18
  And and so I was like, is this like a more naturalistic
• 41:21
  approach to this kind of thing? Because I feel like lots of
• 41:23
  actors would go way bigger on that, Like get out, get out,
• 41:27
  like almost like crazy themselves.
• 41:29
  But she still sort of plays it very like you need to get out,
• 41:33
  get out. But then also like they've OK,
• 41:36
  so then they have a sort of altercation with evil spider
• 41:39
  man. He kills some cops and then
• 41:41
  they're like escaping the subway, but they just walk out
• 41:44
  of the subway. I'm sorry.
• 41:45
  They have just seen like a spidery man person crawling on
• 41:51
  the roof trying to kill them and they're not screaming and
• 41:55
  running and and then they're still having like a sassy quote
• 41:58
  because obviously each of the girls represent something
• 42:00
  different, don't they? We've got our like, money, you
• 42:04
  know, spoiled rich. Kid, we've got our weirdo.
• 42:08
  We've got our nerd. And obviously they're so
• 42:11
  different that if you check them in the back of a taxi, they're
• 42:14
  going to have issues with each other.
• 42:15
  I'm sorry. Sparks are going to.
• 42:16
  I would be a fucking mess if that thing was there.
• 42:20
  And also as well, he could have, he could have killed them.
• 42:22
  I'm sorry. Like, why was he like picking
• 42:25
  them off 1 by 1? I it was literally like, you
• 42:28
  could easily kill all four, all four of them straight away.
• 42:31
  Yeah. He killed about 10 cops in that
• 42:33
  subway station, but yeah, they all got away just fine.
• 42:37
  And again, I was like, I feel like, you know, this is a weird
• 42:39
  thing to say for kind of these Marvel films.
• 42:42
  It was so understated because you're normally like, OK, that's
• 42:46
  the first part now of what is going to be a bigger sequence of
• 42:49
  chase, right? So you're like, that's like,
• 42:51
  sort of teased it. So now they're out.
• 42:53
  Now she's driving the taxi, escaping, right?
• 42:55
  What's the next thing? He's going to smash through the
• 42:57
  window. They're going to have to climb
• 42:58
  through something else. No, she just gets in a taxi and
• 43:01
  just drives away. And it's like we're safe.
• 43:04
  Yeah, why don't they go to the police then?
• 43:07
  I mean, I'm not obviously a cab, but in this world in 2003,
• 43:14
  she's, she works for the fire department as an EMT or some, or
• 43:18
  she works for, I don't know, she works as an EMT.
• 43:20
  She's in the system. Just like say someone just tried
• 43:24
  to kill these girls. I've run, I've saved them.
• 43:28
  There's a bunch of dead cops and things are pretty fucked up.
• 43:32
  I think I'd be, I'd like, I'd like you to keep us safe.
• 43:34
  But yeah, and I think, and I think I'm pretty confident that
• 43:37
  you're not going to think I've kidnapped them, I'm pretty sure.
• 43:41
  And, and, but no, no, she's, she's like, let me let me kidnap
• 43:44
  them and I'll take them to the the woods of New York.
• 43:50
  But is this where like, there's a there's a different film being
• 43:52
  made, like an, a 24 film where Madam Webb has visions of all of
• 43:56
  these things and they don't actually exist to anyone else,
• 44:00
  Right. And so she has actually
• 44:01
  kidnapped them and is. Yeah, yeah.
• 44:04
  This is also probably a good time to talk about Sydney
• 44:06
  Sweeney's wig. Yeah.
• 44:08
  I mean, what, Like what in the Smithies is going on with that?
• 44:14
  I actually have a quote about this.
• 44:16
  This is a quote from Sidney Sweeney.
• 44:18
  She says that wig was so hot. And we were filming in Boston in
• 44:21
  the middle of the summer. It was one of the hottest days.
• 44:23
  And we were in the middle of filming.
• 44:25
  And I go one second and I turn around and I just started
• 44:27
  throwing up. And then I turn back and I go,
• 44:30
  we're all good. We can keep going.
• 44:31
  I was overheating. My body was shutting down.
• 44:34
  That was great. The wig added a lot of
• 44:35
  interesting elements. Was it a synthetic wig there?
• 44:39
  It must have been. I mean, it looks like it looks
• 44:42
  synthetic. It looked so wiggy that it was
• 44:44
  like. It had a lot of static going on
• 44:47
  in it, didn't it? The.
• 44:49
  Wig was so bad it made her throw up.
• 44:52
  I mean, we've all been. I've definitely been there with
• 44:55
  my wig at this point in the movie as well, I feel like.
• 44:58
  Have you ever watched the TV show Haunted before on Channel
• 45:02
  4? No, but I'm familiar.
• 45:04
  So it's basically a bunch of people who are escaping from
• 45:07
  like these security figures, police kind of things, and they
• 45:10
  get chased around cities. And then you go to like a fake
• 45:15
  sort of intelligence hub that they film afterwards.
• 45:18
  And it's basically people behind computers like locking in on
• 45:22
  like cameras in the city going. We found them and I was
• 45:25
  basically that. It's just what's the chops is
• 45:28
  doing that all by herself? They don't even have like a big
• 45:30
  room of it, but it's all like I've been checking every camera
• 45:33
  in the city. It's like it's haunted, the
• 45:36
  movie. I would love to take part if
• 45:39
  Shoshanna from Girls was the one hunting me.
• 45:44
  Yeah, so now they they drive to the woods, don't they?
• 45:46
  They do, yeah. They go to the woods.
• 45:48
  She leaves them in the woods, says stay here, and then Cassie
• 45:52
  goes back to her apartment and finds her mother's notes.
• 45:55
  Can I just say something? Sorry to I know we're going on,
• 45:57
  but great idea to leave them in the woods with like no lights or
• 46:01
  anything. Just leave you there.
• 46:04
  I'm not sure there are woods. Well, clearly.
• 46:08
  Not there's a diner just a 3 minute walk from where they are.
• 46:11
  It's a bit of greenery. And also the other thing is I
• 46:14
  love how they really cement how hungry they are because it's a
• 46:17
  jerky. And again, it's like, I don't
• 46:19
  know, I've never been. I've never had like a spider
• 46:22
  person villain spider man. No, not a spider man, definitely
• 46:26
  not a spider man. I've never had a spider person
• 46:28
  try to kill me. So I don't know how I would
• 46:31
  feel. I would presume I would be so
• 46:33
  fucking shell shocked that I literally would be hiding under
• 46:36
  like a fucking dead tree holding them dearly, crying and being
• 46:42
  sort of scared for my life. I don't think I'd be like, oh, I
• 46:44
  want to go to a diner now and dance on the table to Britney.
• 46:48
  Yeah, stay in the car. Lock the doors, girls.
• 46:52
  No, no. Instead they're going to leave a
• 46:54
  lit fire in the woods and just head off on an adventure.
• 46:57
  But before we get there, sorry, Cassie goes home and she's going
• 47:01
  through her mother's notes, which talks about the spider
• 47:04
  people. She talks to her cat.
• 47:06
  Have you ever heard of Las Aranias?
• 47:09
  Me. Neither have.
• 47:11
  You ever heard of Las Aranias? Me neither.
• 47:15
  And then she tries to climb a wall.
• 47:17
  This was actually one of the few, I would say, intentional
• 47:20
  comedic moments in the movie that I found funny.
• 47:23
  But it was. They were few and far between.
• 47:25
  Yeah. Yeah.
• 47:27
  So the girls leave the woods. They ignore her instructions.
• 47:29
  They go to a diner. And this is where I knew we were
• 47:33
  in the Catwoman extended universe because they're walking
• 47:36
  there. And what song is playing?
• 47:39
  Scandalous by Mystique. Yeah, wonderful.
• 47:44
  Again, what a bop. What a bop.
• 47:48
  I know I've previously introduced my camp clues, but
• 47:51
  Crystal's camp clues now needs to include Mystique.
• 47:55
  Scandalous. You know, you're in for a treat,
• 47:57
  yeah. You're probably watching a camp
• 47:58
  movie if Mystique Scandalous plays.
• 48:03
  But again, another scene that actually has great potential to
• 48:07
  be pretty scary. Yeah, yeah.
• 48:10
  So they're at the diner. A trucker sees the girls and
• 48:13
  recognizes him from his newspaper, which is somehow
• 48:17
  already out that day. Yeah, I.
• 48:19
  Mean news gets, you know, I've kind of forgotten the days
• 48:22
  before social media when news was pretty instant.
• 48:25
  I'm pretty sure it wasn't that instant.
• 48:27
  I think I'm pretty sure newspapers came out this the day
• 48:30
  after usually. Maybe you had an evening
• 48:34
  edition, but Even so, I think they probably should have had
• 48:39
  ATV in the diner where she was watching.
• 48:42
  Yeah, I think that would. That would have made worse
• 48:44
  anyway. Whatever he he calls in.
• 48:47
  The missing girls are there and that's how Ezekiel tracks them.
• 48:52
  Evil Spider Man tracks them and shows up at the diner to kill.
• 48:58
  Them. And he does kill them again.
• 48:59
  We see him killing the teenagers.
• 49:01
  Again, in exactly the same way. Token them out.
• 49:04
  But that turns out to be a just a vision.
• 49:06
  Cassie's had another vision and to the sounds of Britney Spears
• 49:10
  toxic, she drives her stolen taxi into the diner and into our
• 49:15
  villain. She was making the right meal of
• 49:17
  it, getting there, wasn't she? I was like, how do you how do
• 49:19
  you even know how where you're going?
• 49:20
  Because you're the route you're driving seems to be really long
• 49:24
  ways. You've literally just walked it.
• 49:25
  If you just ran and, you could have got there beforehand it.
• 49:28
  Turns out you could walk there faster than you can drive and.
• 49:32
  Also, I love that she was timing it exactly exactly.
• 49:35
  To the song of Toxic. Yeah, it's like a song that this
• 49:37
  is a new hit on the radio. So, so suddenly she's got time
• 49:40
  to be learning the lyrics to a Britney Spears song.
• 49:45
  And. Again, what?
• 49:48
  What an exciting way to get rid of a villain to just drive a
• 49:51
  taxi into him. Yeah.
• 49:54
  And that's where he poisons her though, isn't it?
• 49:56
  So he grabs her and poisons. Her poisons her a bit.
• 49:58
  This is where I started to find the vision thing a bit boring
• 50:02
  because I actually felt like it kind of meant there was no
• 50:06
  stakes because you're like, there's a thing that could
• 50:08
  happen, but now we'll just rewind.
• 50:10
  And I don't know, it's kind of hard to make that feel actiony.
• 50:13
  Yeah. It's like, it would have been
• 50:15
  exciting if it was like, you know, oh, But the downfall to
• 50:18
  this power is you have bits where you just go unconscious
• 50:21
  for like, and you don't know what's happened or do you know
• 50:23
  something else? So it's just the stakes are
• 50:25
  higher. Or like it's happening or you
• 50:27
  watch it happening in real time. So she's like, you know, he goes
• 50:32
  to punch her and she sees the future, so she moves out of the
• 50:35
  way and it becomes a bit of an action sequence rather than
• 50:38
  like, here are two scenes. 1 is where the bad thing happens, and
• 50:42
  now we'll do another one where it doesn't happen.
• 50:44
  Yeah. The Cassie takes the girls back
• 50:46
  to Queens. And that scene in the car was so
• 50:49
  annoying to me because it's like her telling them off and then
• 50:53
  all SAT. And then she's kind of like, oh,
• 50:55
  she feels bad and looks back on them and it's like my girls.
• 50:57
  And it's just like, oh. It's all my girls.
• 51:00
  This is where we learned the girls are all sort of orphans.
• 51:03
  And then Cassie teaches them CPRCPR count 6 Ding.
• 51:10
  And it's like, why would they do that?
• 51:12
  I mean, that's not foreshadowing anything.
• 51:13
  Oh, God, no, no, no, they're not.
• 51:15
  They're not bringing all this CPR into the movie for any
• 51:17
  reason. Just it's just just don't worry
• 51:20
  about it. It's like the fireworks factory.
• 51:24
  There's another great line here. There.
• 51:26
  She's just teaching them CPR. And one of the girls says,
• 51:30
  you're a good teacher. And Cassie says, well, I've been
• 51:33
  learning some things too. And then uses that as
• 51:35
  exposition. It's like those are those are
• 51:38
  not linking sentences. It reminded me of the line in
• 51:43
  Mortal Kombat, Annihilation Mother, you're alive.
• 51:48
  Too bad you will die. Too bad you will.
• 51:53
  Die. Right.
• 51:55
  OK. Are you familiar with that?
• 51:57
  No. I'm not.
• 51:57
  We're going to geeky now. You're doing.
• 51:59
  You're doing your geek. Podcast now.
• 52:01
  OK, sorry, it's on YouTube. It's on YouTube.
• 52:04
  It's a nine second video and it's it's called the worst line
• 52:07
  reading in cinema history. Right.
• 52:09
  OK, yeah. Is where is this where she goes?
• 52:13
  One of my favorite lines that she says to them is seriously,
• 52:16
  don't do dumb things. I love limes.
• 52:19
  Hopeless spiders were worth it, Mom.
• 52:21
  So the girls are taking refuge at Uncle Ben's and Cassie while
• 52:26
  she flies to Peru. Even though she's wanted for
• 52:30
  kidnapping, she's like, no, let me take that stolen taxi to the
• 52:34
  airport and take. The place off and just left them
• 52:37
  on the floor, so that will cover, won't it?
• 52:39
  And I'm going to go to, I'm going to go to Peru.
• 52:41
  It makes it look like it's really easy to get to the
• 52:44
  Peruvian Amazon, which, you know, getting to the remote part
• 52:48
  where her mother was, where she found that rare spider.
• 52:51
  It looks like that's just all in a day's work for Cassie.
• 52:54
  And also just like this, this evil spider person has done a
• 52:58
  pretty good job of finding those girls.
• 53:00
  Yeah. In no, we're just going to,
• 53:01
  we're going to pause that. Don't worry about it.
• 53:04
  Cassie's got a got a Peru. I know she's Peru, but it's
• 53:07
  like, you know, in the space of maybe six hours, he's he's.
• 53:11
  Oh, yeah, Yeah. No, no, don't.
• 53:12
  No, you're overthink. Don't worry.
• 53:14
  It's fine. It's fine.
• 53:16
  Cassie's got time to go to Peru and back.
• 53:20
  It'll be absolutely fine. The.
• 53:25
  She then meets Santiago, who's the tribal chief who had tried
• 53:28
  to save her mother. He's now an art teacher.
• 53:32
  Yeah. Yeah, yeah.
• 53:33
  I guess 30 years have passed. Things have changed.
• 53:35
  The tribe is. Well what's his face Hasn't
• 53:38
  really aged The evil spider person.
• 53:40
  Is that because of the spider stuff or?
• 53:42
  Maybe he's got some grey hair now.
• 53:44
  Yeah. But I mean, it's minimal.
• 53:46
  Yeah, yeah. He, the Santiago, puts Cassie to
• 53:52
  a ritual that separates her soul from her body.
• 53:54
  Now, is this Ian Asker? Is this what that is?
• 53:57
  Is it ayahuasca? Ayahuasca.
• 53:59
  Is that? Yeah, yeah, I think there's more
• 54:01
  vomiting. When when you do ayahuasca.
• 54:03
  But maybe that's what Sidney Sweeney was talking about,
• 54:06
  actually. Yeah, they were all doing it and
• 54:09
  they ended up just filming them. They weren't conscious of what
• 54:12
  they were doing. Because she goes through some
• 54:15
  fucking trippy stuff, doesn't she?
• 54:17
  She. Sure does.
• 54:18
  She goes through a higher plane of consciousness where all
• 54:21
  living things are connected and she can see all the futures and
• 54:25
  all the pasts. And she learns that her mother's
• 54:28
  was looking for the spider, not for fame or money, but because
• 54:32
  she was trying to save Cassie from having myasthenia gravis.
• 54:37
  No, this is my I. This might be my favorite line
• 54:40
  in the movie because she then says but I don't have a
• 54:43
  neuromuscular disorder. But I don't have a neuromuscular
• 54:46
  disorder. Anything this movie thinks, you
• 54:51
  know, what, could we leave this unsaid?
• 54:53
  And people would still get it? They're like, probably.
• 54:55
  But it doesn't matter because we're going to say it.
• 54:57
  Yeah. Anyway.
• 54:58
  Yeah. And like, and God forbid this
• 54:59
  woman who's like a scientist was just just wanting to find it
• 55:03
  because she wanted to actually save other people.
• 55:05
  And yeah, no, no, no, no, no. She's a woman.
• 55:07
  And it has to be. She's a woman.
• 55:09
  Child doesn't. It yeah, motherhood comes.
• 55:11
  Yes, but she does get to like make up with her mom, doesn't
• 55:16
  she? She does she like in a past
• 55:19
  vision, she kind of forgives her mom and.
• 55:21
  And says look at me, I didn't get it.
• 55:23
  It worked. Yeah.
• 55:26
  And then Santiago tells her that that accepting her
• 55:30
  responsibility can unlock her true power.
• 55:32
  And this is I think where the movie comes the funniest,
• 55:37
  closest to the Spider Man universe because he says when
• 55:42
  you take on the responsibility, great power will come.
• 55:46
  They obviously cannot say with great power comes great
• 55:48
  responsibility. That's a Spider Man line.
• 55:51
  How is it I didn't know that? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
• 55:54
  yeah. I didn't know that.
• 55:55
  So the famous line from Spider Man is with great power comes
• 56:00
  great responsibility, but obviously that is copyrighted,
• 56:03
  That is a Spider Man IP, so they can't say it.
• 56:07
  They had to find a new way to spin that line.
• 56:11
  But still, you know, we need to be in the Spider Man universe.
• 56:14
  Like we're not, we're not letting them like take that away
• 56:16
  from us. Oh, that's why I didn't know.
• 56:18
  I didn't, I didn't pick up on these things.
• 56:20
  That's that's hilarious, though. It's like, Oh my God.
• 56:24
  When you accept responsibility, great power will come.
• 56:28
  It's like it's like they said, ChatGPT rewrite this line for us
• 56:32
  so it does not infringe anyone's IP.
• 56:37
  OK, we're back in Queens. Ben's pregnant.
• 56:40
  I missed that. Sorry.
• 56:44
  Emma Roberts goes into labor earlier than expected, so he
• 56:47
  takes her to the hospital along with the girls.
• 56:49
  I'm not sure why the girls go to the hospital, but yeah, I think
• 56:53
  it seems like they could have avoided a lot of trouble if they
• 56:56
  just stayed home, which had been safe up to this point.
• 56:59
  But anyway, they go to the hospital.
• 57:00
  They're seen on camera in the car.
• 57:02
  So Ezekiel starts to track them down.
• 57:05
  Cassie gets back from Peru and realizes the girls are missing.
• 57:09
  And she realizes that because there's amniotic fluid on the
• 57:12
  floor, she sees a puddle on the floor.
• 57:16
  She's like, shit babies, I'm going to have to go.
• 57:21
  So she heads out, but instead of taking her stolen taxi, she then
• 57:27
  steals an ambulance. Yes, yeah, which is a it's a
• 57:30
  better vehicle to drive around. And it is a better vehicle, but
• 57:33
  she's like, that ambulance is here because someone's dying in
• 57:35
  the house next door. But Oh well, I don't give a
• 57:38
  shit. I'm still we've seen.
• 57:41
  Her manoeuvre, that vehicle, she knows what she's doing though,
• 57:43
  doesn't she does. She does.
• 57:44
  I mean, she's familiar with driving an ambulance, so it does
• 57:46
  make sense. And also, it's trying to make
• 57:48
  sense because if you need people to clear the way, you can just
• 57:50
  turn the sirens on. And people aren't going to be
• 57:52
  knowing what she's doing, are they?
• 57:53
  It's like. Yeah, it's just a kind of a
• 57:55
  shame that she left that neighbor to die stealing their,
• 58:01
  you know, trip to the hospital. But.
• 58:03
  That's a that's a really good point.
• 58:05
  Why are we celebrate? Why are we celebrating her
• 58:08
  saving these three women's lives when the amount of people that
• 58:11
  are dying in the yeah, police people, this poor person,
• 58:15
  they're like, people are just dying, aren't they?
• 58:17
  We're not at the end of it either.
• 58:18
  There's more, there's more. So anyway, Cassie's driving the
• 58:22
  ambulance and she drives it through a wall and into Ezekiel
• 58:27
  just as he's attacking the girls.
• 58:29
  So now she's hit him twice with vehicles, which this movie never
• 58:34
  does anything once when it could do it twice, 3 * 4 times.
• 58:38
  But yeah, Cassie's getting really good at her visions now.
• 58:41
  And they use those CPR thingies to electrocute Ezekiel.
• 58:46
  What are they called? And yes, we are at CPR count 7.
• 58:51
  By the way, 7 seven, yeah. So then they lure Ezekiel back
• 58:57
  to the condemned fireworks factory.
• 59:01
  Yeah, I know it. What, you didn't think they were
• 59:03
  going to let leave that hanging? And they set up a bunch of traps
• 59:06
  to sort of disorient him while Cassie, using her super powers
• 59:12
  of foresight, calls for a medical evac helicopter to fly
• 59:16
  to their location. Not not to rescue them, because
• 59:21
  I I presume she saw that, then that helicopter explodes.
• 59:30
  I'm not sure why she called those people to lure them to
• 59:33
  their death, but she's like, if there's one thing I hate, it's
• 59:36
  people who work in my field. I didn't even think of it like
• 59:40
  that. Again, the a 24 version of this
• 59:43
  film is she's just, she's just telling people she's set all of
• 59:46
  these traps like come here, you're going to die.
• 59:51
  So good, so good. Anyway, they have a fight with
• 59:54
  the baddie and he destroys the helicopter.
• 59:59
  He separates the girls. They're all at the same time,
• 1:00:02
  hanging off beams. But then they they've already
• 1:00:05
  spunked what her big superpower is.
• 1:00:07
  So we know what's coming, don't we?
• 1:00:09
  Yeah, we've already heard that she can be in multiple places at
• 1:00:12
  once if she accepts the great responsibility.
• 1:00:15
  So she. Like why didn't they just why
• 1:00:18
  didn't they just do it where it's like, oh, you know, but
• 1:00:20
  what's my power? Because she complaints that
• 1:00:21
  she's not as strong as him and that and quick, you know, why
• 1:00:25
  didn't they just do a line? Like, you know, when the time is
• 1:00:28
  right, the power will come into you and you you expect so we
• 1:00:31
  still don't know what it is. But no, we've, we've, we've
• 1:00:33
  bloody her now we've seen it. We know what's happening.
• 1:00:36
  Well, I think it's actually kind of good that they did say that
• 1:00:39
  before because it is very unclear what happens.
• 1:00:43
  She kind of astral projects and sort of picks them all up off
• 1:00:47
  the ledges they're dangling from.
• 1:00:48
  But if you hadn't had someone say you can be in multiple
• 1:00:52
  places at once, I'm not sure you'd understand what was
• 1:00:55
  happening. Was it clear to you?
• 1:00:58
  Well. No, but then no, because also
• 1:00:59
  the other thing was I was like, is she flying now and holding
• 1:01:02
  people? I was like, that's quite a
• 1:01:03
  strong superpower, isn't it? Yeah, anyway.
• 1:01:06
  At the same time, not because she she kind of saves them, but
• 1:01:10
  not really. And then, yeah.
• 1:01:13
  But anyway, it's it's a fucking mess basically.
• 1:01:17
  And then suddenly those girls, like they're getting thrown all
• 1:01:21
  around the thing and they're spinning round poles, etcetera.
• 1:01:23
  And it's like, oh, I didn't realize you had superhero
• 1:01:25
  powers. Now, yeah, yeah, Ezekiel falls
• 1:01:28
  to his death. He's crushed by a Pepsi sign.
• 1:01:30
  We haven't mentioned the Pepsi product.
• 1:01:32
  Which is just constant, I know, But I feel like films nowadays
• 1:01:35
  have got pretty good at like doing it in a kind of like a
• 1:01:38
  less obvious way. But this is just ridiculous.
• 1:01:41
  And that set piece apparently was leftover from a previous
• 1:01:44
  Marvel film and it wasn't used. Oh, wow, it was already built.
• 1:01:47
  And they were like, oh, we might as well use it.
• 1:01:49
  It wasn't even like. Fair.
• 1:01:51
  Yeah, he's he's crushed by a Pepsi sign.
• 1:01:54
  And then Cassie also falls into the Hudson again.
• 1:01:57
  Again. You know, nothing in this movie
• 1:01:59
  happens one time. I guess that's that's the nature
• 1:02:02
  of her superpowers. It's all going to happen twice.
• 1:02:05
  But she sinks really fast and then a firework hits her in the
• 1:02:08
  face. The girls rescue her and yes,
• 1:02:14
  they save her with CPR. There you go.
• 1:02:19
  And she wakes up, her eyes are all white, I guess because.
• 1:02:23
  That's what happens when a firework goes.
• 1:02:24
  That's what happens when a firework hits you in the face
• 1:02:27
  and she's also paralysed getting firework in the face.
• 1:02:31
  Listen, I'm not an expert. Yeah, but she's in the hospital,
• 1:02:36
  and Peter Parker has just been born in the room next door.
• 1:02:40
  This is another one of my favorite bits.
• 1:02:43
  So I don't know how familiar you are with the lore, but Cassie
• 1:02:46
  says to the girls, like, how's Ben doing?
• 1:02:48
  And they say Uncle Ben stoked about being an uncle, all the
• 1:02:51
  fun and none of the responsibility.
• 1:02:53
  And Cassie then says that's what he thinks, which is her saying
• 1:02:58
  lol Emma Roberts, you're gonna die.
• 1:03:01
  Death to all of them. Oh yeah, of course.
• 1:03:05
  I Because she really loves knowing this shit, doesn't she?
• 1:03:11
  Oh my God. Yeah, it's so.
• 1:03:14
  It's so psychotic. Yeah, and she didn't.
• 1:03:16
  Again, she's got plenty of time to set that up.
• 1:03:18
  I mean until we've. We've if one thing this movie
• 1:03:21
  has established is that she can save people if she wants to, but
• 1:03:27
  she has not forgiven Emma Roberts for that baby shower.
• 1:03:29
  No, it's like, bitch, you're going under.
• 1:03:33
  It's so good. And then it brings us to what is
• 1:03:36
  the most satisfying part of the entire film for me.
• 1:03:39
  Okay, so yeah, some time passes and they're all living together
• 1:03:43
  in a spider loft. Yes, he's in a wheelchair.
• 1:03:46
  She's basically Doctor X, isn't she?
• 1:03:48
  Yeah, yeah. She not only, yeah, is she
• 1:03:51
  Professor X, but she's also wearing blind gas glasses, which
• 1:03:55
  does not stop Sydney Sweeney from saying, how's your
• 1:03:59
  eyesight? And also as well, the eyewear
• 1:04:04
  choice is exquisite. She really is feeling her oats
• 1:04:07
  now, isn't she? In a way that she never did
• 1:04:08
  before. She's just.
• 1:04:09
  Like, yeah, her clairvoyance, she sees the future much more
• 1:04:13
  clearly, and she says to the girls that she's going to mentor
• 1:04:17
  them in their future roles when the time.
• 1:04:19
  Comes, but this is where. Shot.
• 1:04:21
  Sorry, go. So this is where it gets really
• 1:04:23
  fucking toxic, okay? Because I feel like she's
• 1:04:26
  grooming these these young girls because now she's in a position
• 1:04:30
  where she can basically just say anything to them and they're
• 1:04:33
  going to believe that this is the in the future because she
• 1:04:36
  does know, right? So when she's about to sneeze,
• 1:04:38
  she goes bless you, blah, blah, blah.
• 1:04:39
  Yeah, I don't, I don't trust her.
• 1:04:41
  I think she's going to keep them there.
• 1:04:43
  And I think she's going to basically be like, yeah, I just
• 1:04:46
  get, I just get weird broomy vibes from her at this point.
• 1:04:49
  Totally. Well, she's got, she's probably
• 1:04:50
  got like box full of radioactive spiders that she's like, when
• 1:04:54
  you fall asleep tonight, I'm going to get these to bite.
• 1:04:57
  Yeah, it's very that. But we do get a shot of them in
• 1:05:01
  the future. They're all in their superhero
• 1:05:03
  suits and she looks like Katy Perry.
• 1:05:08
  She's got some enormous red wrap around sunglasses.
• 1:05:11
  It's a Woman's World and you're lucky to be Livia.
• 1:05:14
  It is so Woman's World. Sexy.
• 1:05:18
  Confident. Do you think when they were
• 1:05:21
  wearing those costumes, they were all being like, this is it,
• 1:05:24
  this is our next movie? Fucking yeah.
• 1:05:27
  Maybe, maybe. Which is quite unfortunate.
• 1:05:31
  Because isn't this the only film in the Marvel Universe that
• 1:05:34
  doesn't have a post titles post created sequence?
• 1:05:39
  One of very few. Yeah, is literally like unheard
• 1:05:42
  of, especially this far down the line.
• 1:05:44
  They always like pack a punch. Nope, they knew.
• 1:05:46
  No, no, the editors had had enough.
• 1:05:50
  They've had enough with the re dubbing it.
• 1:05:53
  Was and the movie ends with the line, the best thing about the
• 1:05:56
  future. It hasn't happened yet.
• 1:06:00
  Unfortunately, this movie has happened.
• 1:06:03
  What does that line even mean? It's so good.
• 1:06:06
  OK, well, there we go. That's Madam Webb.
• 1:06:10
  Wow, I feel like I've been on a ride again with it.
• 1:06:13
  I will say that I I love this movie and I wouldn't change
• 1:06:16
  anything. I'm going to and I'm going to
• 1:06:18
  proceed to give it some notes, but I I'm really glad it exists
• 1:06:22
  in this form. I think, I think nowadays it's
• 1:06:24
  really hard to have a film that fail, that fails in a way that
• 1:06:29
  is kind of enjoyable because there are layers to this film
• 1:06:33
  about why it failed. It's not just because like we
• 1:06:36
  listed some of the films earlier, they're just crap,
• 1:06:38
  aren't they? They're just, yeah, actually.
• 1:06:39
  And actually, so much of this film is comparable to just your
• 1:06:42
  bog standard bad Marvel films. But I think there are just some
• 1:06:45
  additional layers that just give it that extra.
• 1:06:47
  Yeah, it takes it from like flop to like fiasco.
• 1:06:52
  Yeah, it's it's like it's an elevated bad movie.
• 1:06:56
  It's so bad that it's an event. And it's like it hasn't been
• 1:07:00
  done intentionally to be bad, has it?
• 1:07:04
  It's just failed. And it's just, and like you get
• 1:07:07
  a sense of people just giving up at various stages, but it's on.
• 1:07:12
  I wondered, like I wondered at some point if they did decide to
• 1:07:16
  lean into bad and be like, I wonder if we can get some buzz
• 1:07:19
  going about how bad this is and it will get people to go and see
• 1:07:22
  it. Because that's what happened
• 1:07:24
  with Morbius, right? Morbius flopped so bad and then
• 1:07:30
  people were memeing it but it was straight people and there
• 1:07:34
  were so many memes going around about it that Sony re released
• 1:07:37
  it into cinemas because they thought there was buzz and then
• 1:07:40
  it flopped and then it flopped again.
• 1:07:44
  How could are we? Are we living in a universe
• 1:07:45
  where that's that's like a? Marvel.
• 1:07:47
  So maybe we're being trolled by Sony.
• 1:07:49
  I don't know, maybe they I don't think so.
• 1:07:51
  I think it's probably giving them too much credit, but.
• 1:07:53
  Why did Dakota get cast in this role?
• 1:07:57
  I guess Marvel has done like the deadpan lady.
• 1:08:03
  Yeah, quite successfully, I would say.
• 1:08:07
  Like Scarlett Johansson's Black Widow, I guess is kind of in
• 1:08:10
  that she's always going to give you like a cool one liner,
• 1:08:13
  right? Yeah.
• 1:08:14
  So I guess there's you could almost imagine that working in a
• 1:08:19
  in a different way with Dakota Johnson, but.
• 1:08:21
  And I guess as well, I guess Dakota Johnson is quite cool in
• 1:08:25
  this. Yeah.
• 1:08:26
  And I do like the fact that she doesn't have a love interest
• 1:08:29
  like an odd. I like that.
• 1:08:30
  And I do like the fact that she's not wearing anything,
• 1:08:34
  like, sexual or sexy. Yeah.
• 1:08:36
  Yeah. Just like a tan leather jacket.
• 1:08:39
  It's giving. Did you watch Jessica Jones?
• 1:08:41
  No, no. So Jessica Jones is like, she's
• 1:08:44
  like an alcoholic superhero in New York.
• 1:08:47
  It's a really great show. Actually.
• 1:08:49
  It's it's also a marvel. But she's she's just very like
• 1:08:52
  jeans and a leather jacket and she she kind of hates fighting
• 1:08:56
  crime. It's very that sort of vibe.
• 1:08:59
  But I think Dakota Johnson doesn't give it enough mean to
• 1:09:02
  make that work either. So it's it just ends up in this
• 1:09:05
  like hinterland of she just really doesn't want to be there,
• 1:09:08
  which. Also, this is another, this is
• 1:09:10
  probably like my toxic trait when she's like Katy Perry at
• 1:09:13
  the end. I'm kind of like, oh, that's the
• 1:09:14
  matter whereby I want to see as well.
• 1:09:16
  I'm sorry if you're a female superhero, I want to see a big
• 1:09:20
  blowout. I want to see a body suit.
• 1:09:23
  I want to see a Cape. I want to see some like design
• 1:09:26
  aspects to you to what's going on.
• 1:09:27
  Do you know what I mean? Yeah, it is those, I think all
• 1:09:32
  of those superhero costumes except maybe Madam Webs, which
• 1:09:35
  is very silly. But the the other three, they
• 1:09:37
  look cool and fine and fun. It is.
• 1:09:40
  It is pretty criminal that like they set them up without
• 1:09:43
  actually using them. And the trailer features those
• 1:09:47
  costumes heavily. So it implies that it's going to
• 1:09:50
  be a movie about these three young superheroes and their
• 1:09:52
  mentor, but it's not that at all, because they're only used
• 1:09:57
  in like little Flash sequences. I don't know why they bother
• 1:10:01
  with so many fucking origin stories.
• 1:10:02
  I want to just get involved in the action.
• 1:10:04
  I want to see the superpowers, I want to, I want to see them
• 1:10:07
  going hell for metal at each other.
• 1:10:08
  And it's like you didn't even really get a sense from Evil
• 1:10:11
  Spider person of what he was capable of really.
• 1:10:16
  No, no, no. It was it.
• 1:10:20
  Yeah. The best that can be said about
• 1:10:22
  him is that he had at least 2 a clear motivation.
• 1:10:25
  He's like, I'm going to kill them because they're going to
• 1:10:27
  kill me. I guess that's kind of fun.
• 1:10:29
  But there could have, I think also maybe been an interesting
• 1:10:32
  movie where Dakota Johnson is when the movie happens, she's
• 1:10:37
  already a grizzled, like experienced superhero or she's
• 1:10:42
  familiar with her powers. She's like the Terminator,
• 1:10:45
  Terminator 2 and she's already like a cool bad ass.
• 1:10:51
  And then she's like having to save maybe one person who's
• 1:10:55
  developing powers because 3 is too many.
• 1:10:59
  It's crammed that it, it just feels silly.
• 1:11:02
  So she's saving one girl who's coming into their powers and she
• 1:11:05
  mentors them into becoming a superhero.
• 1:11:08
  And we see like cool stuff with her powers.
• 1:11:11
  But because we spend so much time setting up Dakota Johnson,
• 1:11:14
  it's like the movie is trying to set up two sets of origin
• 1:11:17
  stories at the exact same time, which is very.
• 1:11:21
  And it just means that we get no sense of The Who those girls are
• 1:11:24
  and what, what who they are. It's very.
• 1:11:27
  Oh, they're so after school special one line, like totally,
• 1:11:31
  you know, yeah, it's nothing. It's nothing.
• 1:11:33
  Nothing. And I do, as I said earlier, I
• 1:11:35
  do think there's an interesting film in this.
• 1:11:36
  If they would have lent more into like the kind of horror
• 1:11:40
  slasher vibe a bit because, you know, this, this this sort of
• 1:11:44
  menacing character trying to hunt down these girls.
• 1:11:47
  It it could be, it could have been way darker and it could
• 1:11:50
  have been way more sinister And it, you know, it could have been
• 1:11:53
  him like discovering that they were staying in the the house.
• 1:11:56
  Do you know what I mean? And like phone calls or like you
• 1:11:59
  said, utilizing what's the chops, the computer cows
• 1:12:03
  shutting up from girls computer Cal, I'm calling it.
• 1:12:06
  But like, yeah, like, why isn't she closing down?
• 1:12:09
  You know, like they're in their apartment in the house, and then
• 1:12:11
  all the lights are going out and they're having to escape and
• 1:12:14
  like, make it more kind of like chasey.
• 1:12:16
  I think that could have been really exciting.
• 1:12:18
  Or, you know, imagine being on the subway again and imagine
• 1:12:22
  like all of the lights and all of the power going and then they
• 1:12:25
  have to cooled through railway tracks and then he's like
• 1:12:28
  crawling through the ceiling and stuff.
• 1:12:30
  You could have made it really scary.
• 1:12:32
  Yeah, well, apparently the director said before the movie
• 1:12:36
  came out wasn't so much a superhero movie, it was more of
• 1:12:39
  a thriller, which which it is not.
• 1:12:43
  But it says she maybe had sort of an same instinct as you of
• 1:12:48
  like, that would make it better. Yeah.
• 1:12:51
  Because didn't Dakota sack all of her agents when the trailer
• 1:12:54
  came out? Yeah, because I there's been
• 1:12:57
  like, and obviously no one knows because I'm sure she's got a
• 1:12:59
  gagging order about it as well. But like she said that she
• 1:13:02
  signed up to what she thought was a very different movie as
• 1:13:05
  well, didn't she? Yeah.
• 1:13:08
  Yeah, I mean, she still was there for all of it.
• 1:13:09
  So I don't know. I don't know what totally she
• 1:13:11
  delivered those lines. So I don't know what she was
• 1:13:13
  expecting. Something spectacular like.
• 1:13:16
  Do you think I've? Really sorry because I I saw in
• 1:13:18
  a junket where she was like she said she still hadn't seen it.
• 1:13:21
  That's true. Oh, I wonder if she's still
• 1:13:23
  never seen it. That would be so fabulous.
• 1:13:27
  She doesn't care about her movie.
• 1:13:28
  She's. Stupidity checking out NASA's
• 1:13:31
  Instagram page. While listening to Dochi.
• 1:13:35
  Yeah. The other thing that really held
• 1:13:37
  this movie back, I think, but also provided a lot of camp
• 1:13:39
  moments, was all of the Spider Man references.
• 1:13:43
  Like, you're not allowed to talk about Spider Man, so just stop
• 1:13:48
  reference, stop circling Spider Man.
• 1:13:50
  It's very weird. There's just such a large
• 1:13:54
  elephant in the room. And it's Emma Roberts's belly.
• 1:13:58
  Yeah, and you're. But no one's allowed to talk
• 1:13:59
  about it. But the movie is so fixated on
• 1:14:02
  it. It's just so weird.
• 1:14:03
  Just like, forget about Spider Man.
• 1:14:05
  Just do your own thing. Imagine all the lawyers, though,
• 1:14:08
  after every script read, every. They must have been like, we
• 1:14:10
  can't do that. You can't say that.
• 1:14:12
  You can't say. Yeah, drop some Easter eggs,
• 1:14:14
  drop some Nuggets, sure. But like, the fact that you're
• 1:14:17
  circling this thing that you're not allowed to talk about is
• 1:14:20
  just so weird. There's a few I'll bring this up
• 1:14:25
  too. There's a few problematic bits I
• 1:14:28
  think, like the way they handle Indigenous representation is.
• 1:14:31
  No shit. Real fucking bad, especially
• 1:14:34
  because that is entirely invented for this movie.
• 1:14:37
  The the comic book character has no links to any indigenous stuff
• 1:14:42
  in Peru that Las Aranyas does not exist in the comics.
• 1:14:46
  It was completely invented for this movie.
• 1:14:47
  So they're like, what can we do that would be a bit like
• 1:14:49
  mystical and and weird. I know we'll just.
• 1:14:52
  Invent. Exploit, exploit an indigenous
• 1:14:56
  thing and like play into these tropes of indigenous people as
• 1:14:59
  like mystical power granters. It's like no.
• 1:15:04
  And the second thing is, is the way they handle disability,
• 1:15:07
  which is quite clunky because the character in the comics does
• 1:15:13
  have myasthenia gravis, which is why she's in a wheelchair.
• 1:15:18
  The movie is like we we need to honor the character.
• 1:15:21
  So we'll end the movie with her being paralyzed, but we will
• 1:15:26
  magically hand wave away her the reason for that earlier on.
• 1:15:30
  So it's kind of like it kind of erases the like significance of
• 1:15:34
  the disability that they're trying to reference.
• 1:15:37
  And then and then they spend the entire movie with her being able
• 1:15:40
  bodied, which I think is kind of problematic as well because the
• 1:15:45
  character is canonically in a wheelchair.
• 1:15:47
  So that's quite a weird choice I feel.
• 1:15:50
  Yeah. I mean, it's, it's probably
• 1:15:52
  problematic across the board, isn't it?
• 1:15:54
  Yeah, what about pros? Like, I guess, you know, it's a
• 1:15:57
  movie centred on relationships between women.
• 1:16:00
  Sisterhood. Yeah, and there are no love
• 1:16:07
  interest, so that's something. There you go, There you go.
• 1:16:10
  That's something, yeah. I mean, yeah, I think, I think,
• 1:16:14
  I think the pros have been a lot of what we've been laughing
• 1:16:17
  about and chuckling about as we've gone through the.
• 1:16:19
  Yeah, I I hope this movie doesn't hold back female fronted
• 1:16:24
  action movies, superhero movies, because there is, it often tends
• 1:16:27
  to be like, oh, well, that's why we can't do superhero movies
• 1:16:31
  with women because that one was so bad.
• 1:16:34
  But actually, no, this movie was bad, and it would have been bad
• 1:16:39
  regardless of who fronted it. And in fact, if anything, the
• 1:16:42
  fact that I had a woman made it watchable.
• 1:16:45
  But you're right, it's like there's yeah, there's the kind
• 1:16:48
  of like a long list of like female fronted superhero films
• 1:16:51
  that have kind of put another nail in the coffin, haven't
• 1:16:54
  there? Like Catwoman as we speak about
• 1:16:56
  Supergirl and yeah, I mean. Wonder Woman.
• 1:16:59
  Yeah, you're now seeing like Gal Gadot.
• 1:17:01
  Is that how you pronounce her name?
• 1:17:02
  Yeah, I think so. Like seeing like all of his
• 1:17:04
  super clips about how terrible an actress she is and you're
• 1:17:07
  like, Oh my God, wow, you're not great, are you?
• 1:17:09
  But yeah, it's like, what's the role?
• 1:17:12
  I mean, who's the best female superhero in that we've seen in
• 1:17:16
  films? Michelle Pfeiffer?
• 1:17:19
  Catwoman. Probably, probably probably the
• 1:17:22
  most successful. Yeah, that's probably one of the
• 1:17:25
  more successful. I mean, she didn't front the
• 1:17:26
  movie, did she? But she made the movie.
• 1:17:30
  Probably. If I had to guess, the most
• 1:17:31
  successful standalone would probably be Black Widow.
• 1:17:35
  But you know, that's not like a particularly exciting movie from
• 1:17:39
  like a feel your oats sort of way.
• 1:17:41
  Yeah, yeah, Supergirl for me, Yeah, again, that film is.
• 1:17:51
  It's yeah, one we need to cover. Definitely.
• 1:17:55
  And I mean, I did enjoy watching it for the second time.
• 1:17:59
  I did enjoy watching it. I'm not the biggest fan of
• 1:18:02
  superhero movies as well, especially like the Marvel
• 1:18:05
  Universe, just because we've got so many of them.
• 1:18:07
  Yeah. So it was hard for me to kind
• 1:18:09
  of. Yeah.
• 1:18:10
  I wasn't expecting to enjoy it when I saw it at the cinema.
• 1:18:13
  And then I was like, oh, this is this is something else, isn't
• 1:18:16
  it? Yeah.
• 1:18:18
  Yeah, it's special. Special in a, in a, in a
• 1:18:21
  Catwoman way. I might not have anything else
• 1:18:24
  to say. No, I don't.
• 1:18:25
  Yeah, I much like this movie, which also has nothing to say.
• 1:18:30
  Yeah, if, if this movie had like a point, what would the point
• 1:18:36
  be, do you think? Like, what is it trying to say?
• 1:18:41
  What's its message? Be mommy, be a mom.
• 1:18:48
  CPR. CPR is the meaning of this.
• 1:18:52
  Madam Web School for CPR. It is like a national service
• 1:18:56
  video and it's getting everybody because it's reminding you if
• 1:18:58
  you know CPR, you can survive all of these different things.
• 1:19:01
  You will save at least 10 people's lives.
• 1:19:04
  While killing about, Yeah. What do you think the death
• 1:19:07
  count on this is? Oh yeah, there's a lot of cops
• 1:19:10
  in that first fight scene. She didn't do CPR on any of
• 1:19:14
  them. None at all.
• 1:19:16
  None at all. All right, well, let's rate this
• 1:19:21
  movie starting with Merrills. I'm Julia Child.
• 1:19:27
  For the quality of the movie, how many Merrills are we giving
• 1:19:29
  this one? Yeah, I think.
• 1:19:33
  I think I'm going to give it one because it is a movie that
• 1:19:36
  exists. Yeah, full stop.
• 1:19:39
  Yeah. I mean the fact that this, how
• 1:19:43
  much was the budget again? Something like 80,000,090
• 1:19:46
  million. And and this is what the result
• 1:19:49
  was. It's I mean, it's it's
• 1:19:51
  impressive. But yeah, I mean, it's one
• 1:19:53
  Meryl. One Meryl Groundbreaking.
• 1:19:56
  OK, Liza's How camp is this movie?
• 1:20:01
  Well, I think the thing I love about this film is I I don't
• 1:20:03
  it's very rare to get films nowadays that aren't just so
• 1:20:06
  self aware and like you saying, like, you know, I'm not sure if
• 1:20:10
  there was a marketing ploy about let's make this a flop to kind
• 1:20:13
  of do it. But you do get lots of films and
• 1:20:15
  lots of projects that are there is sort of like a slight
• 1:20:18
  knowing, Oh, this will go viral thing and it's all very, whereas
• 1:20:22
  there's something pure about how bad this film is.
• 1:20:25
  About just a pure. Flop and I also love that even
• 1:20:28
  with like the huge marketing budgets everything, how they
• 1:20:31
  couldn't mask how much Dakota hated being part of it.
• 1:20:35
  And also just like the fact she couldn't name any spider man
• 1:20:39
  films and she's and she said that she's probably watched like
• 1:20:42
  4% of an entire marvel film before.
• 1:20:45
  And just you can like I've seen some YouTube videos where
• 1:20:48
  they've done like they've shown her in interviews and then
• 1:20:52
  they've done reactions of what it must be like to be a studio
• 1:20:54
  head watching it because it's just like it is.
• 1:20:58
  It is wild to me that that has happened and I what I love about
• 1:21:02
  this is I think it will endure. And I think as she does get
• 1:21:05
  older and as other people get older, we will start hearing
• 1:21:09
  more and more stories about, you know, 20 year anniversary of
• 1:21:12
  Madam Webb, what really went down.
• 1:21:16
  I'm so grateful we got to live in a time where I got to see
• 1:21:20
  double Decker buses in London that said Madam Webb with with
• 1:21:24
  Dakota Johnson in those wrap around sunglasses and a Katy
• 1:21:27
  Perry wig. It's like, what a blessed time
• 1:21:31
  to be. Alive again and also I love that
• 1:21:32
  that's how they market the film and actually it's just in a
• 1:21:35
  sensible bang and a leverage lever coat.
• 1:21:39
  Let's go to the list. I think it's.
• 1:21:41
  OK, queer joy Ting. Ting, Yeah.
• 1:21:45
  I mean, is it consistent Ting? It's not a consistent Ting, but
• 1:21:50
  it is so stupid. It is so stupid.
• 1:21:53
  There's a laugh every 5 to 10 minutes at at the vadnais of the
• 1:21:56
  book, which is queer joy. The biggest queer joy for me was
• 1:21:59
  how uncomfortable she was in that pregnancy party.
• 1:22:04
  Yeah. And that, that was like a really
• 1:22:06
  queer joy moment to me. Yeah, basically, lol.
• 1:22:10
  My mum died. You're going to die.
• 1:22:13
  Well, she knows she's going to die anyway, doesn't she?
• 1:22:15
  So yeah, that's quite, that's quite.
• 1:22:17
  Yeah, it's quite low. Listen.
• 1:22:18
  Oh my God, that's so true. She's like my mum Giles in
• 1:22:21
  childbirth. But oh, that's quite rare.
• 1:22:23
  Oh, that probably won't happen to you.
• 1:22:25
  You're going to die in a completely different way.
• 1:22:29
  I wonder if she ever tells her that.
• 1:22:31
  Yeah, I could imagine her whispering it to her.
• 1:22:33
  You're going to die, bitch. Ongoing, ongoing legacy.
• 1:22:37
  Well, that's TBC at the moment. It's a newbie but I would love
• 1:22:42
  to see this. I feel like we are getting like
• 1:22:45
  some new new generation camp films.
• 1:22:47
  I think the substance is going to sort of move forward.
• 1:22:50
  I would love for this to be re explored and sort of enjoyed
• 1:22:55
  down the line. So it's got potential.
• 1:22:58
  It's also rare that something so hard and is so memed and is so
• 1:23:04
  ironically celebrated at the time.
• 1:23:06
  So the fact that it's happening so much now almost means, like,
• 1:23:09
  imagine in 10 years or 20 years when it's dated.
• 1:23:12
  Yeah. And like, when it looks bad in
• 1:23:14
  that way as well. Like it's got real potential
• 1:23:18
  for, you know, midnight movie. Yeah, absolutely.
• 1:23:21
  And stupid. Yeah.
• 1:23:25
  Informs queer pop culture. Well, I think we, as you said,
• 1:23:29
  it's very memeable, isn't it? There's a lot going on here.
• 1:23:32
  And then anti mainstream underdog flop vibes.
• 1:23:35
  Well, yeah, big old flop. So.
• 1:23:39
  What are you going to give it? Well, you know, we can't see the
• 1:23:44
  future so we don't know how this movie is going to to age, but as
• 1:23:49
  it stands, I feel like I'm going to give it an 8.
• 1:23:55
  An 8. Yeah.
• 1:23:57
  And I think it's got potential to go higher, but it we need to
• 1:24:02
  give it, we need to give it more time in the oven.
• 1:24:04
  I think I'm going to give it an 8 as well.
• 1:24:06
  I think that's true. But I like you said, I think
• 1:24:08
  this is only going to like age like a fine wine.
• 1:24:11
  I think as, as, I think as, yeah, it's still so fresh.
• 1:24:15
  And it's like, although it's terrible, it's still kind of
• 1:24:18
  like it's going to get worse with time, yeah.
• 1:24:20
  It's going to get. It's going to get.
• 1:24:21
  Worse. It's going to get worse.
• 1:24:22
  I think I'm going to give it an 8 for now, but I do think Madam
• 1:24:25
  Webb is whispering in my ear that this has potential to be a
• 1:24:28
  10 and maybe five years. Yeah, yeah.
• 1:24:32
  Well, the best thing about A10 Liza rating?
• 1:24:36
  It hasn't happened yet. But yeah, Dakota welcomed.
• 1:24:41
  Welcome to the club, honey. We're happy to have you.
• 1:24:44
  Yeah, I'm excited to dive into some more of your movies because
• 1:24:47
  I've got a few. I love limes.
• 1:24:54
  Great. Brilliant.
• 1:24:55
  Well, watch it if you haven't watched this movie.
• 1:24:58
  I think it's actually not available to rent.
• 1:25:00
  You have to buy it on on. Yeah, no, I bought it today.
• 1:25:03
  I was like, I don't want to buy it.
• 1:25:05
  I'll pay more money to rent for it.
• 1:25:06
  Rent it. It's cheap, it's cheap, it's I
• 1:25:08
  think it's only 3 lbs to buy so I.
• 1:25:10
  Was like I don't want to own it. Now we both own it.
• 1:25:14
  We both own Madam Web. Oh well.
• 1:25:18
  Beautiful. Let us know what you think.
• 1:25:20
  Do you agree? Should we have rated this movie
• 1:25:22
  higher? I think we.
• 1:25:24
  Lower generous with. It.
• 1:25:28
  What was your favorite camp moment?
• 1:25:30
  Let us know and we'll be back in two more weeks with another camp
• 1:25:35
  classic. You might not.
• 1:25:36
  You might. Not well, there's only one thing
• 1:25:39
  to say, isn't there? Hope the spiders were worth it,
• 1:25:41
  mom. Bye.
• 1:25:44
  Bye, get away. From her, you bitch.
• 1:25:49
  Classic. He was in the Amazon Prime mom
• 1:25:52
  when she was researching spiders right before she died.
• 1:25:55
  No. I thought you can't prostitute
• 1:26:02
  your dog? I still love doggy chow.
• 1:26:06
  I still love doggy chow too.