Latest / No Country For Hot Girls / 19. The Hen Do Scammer, a Street Brawl & Poo Hill

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19. The Hen Do Scammer, a Street Brawl & Poo Hill · No Country For Hot Girls

0:03
SPEAKER_00: Hello.
0:04
SPEAKER_00: You've reached No Country for Hot Girls Podcast.
0:08
SPEAKER_00: We can't come to the phone right now.
0:12
SPEAKER_00: Because we have better things we could do.
0:17
SPEAKER_02: We're feeling worse for air.
0:18
SPEAKER_02: Hi, hi, hands in full full brown.
0:22
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
0:23
SPEAKER_01: I've um camo camouflage myself into my sofa.
0:27
SPEAKER_02: You're literally, you are a sofa.
0:30
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I'm hoping that when Oli gets back, he just can't even see me.
0:33
SPEAKER_01: You just sit on your face.
0:37
SPEAKER_02: Um be disturbed today.
0:40
SPEAKER_02: Just doesn't even acknowledge you, that would be so nice.
0:42
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
0:42
SPEAKER_02: Doesn't even look at you.
0:46
SPEAKER_02: Um, so we just got back from a hen a Hindu of one of our best friends in Marseille.
0:53
SPEAKER_02: Um, and because we are cheap, cheap, um well, we're just really stingy.
1:01
SPEAKER_02: We refuse to pay for the normal It's not that we're stingy, it's that we're just being frugal.
1:11
SPEAKER_02: Well, it's always a way, isn't it?
1:12
SPEAKER_02: I don't know when we'll learn our fucking lesson, but there was like several options for flights, and we obviously decided to go for the cheapest one.
1:18
SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna stop you right there.
1:20
SPEAKER_01: There was one other option for a flight, which you 100% should have gotten.
1:25
SPEAKER_01: I know, and didn't.
1:27
SPEAKER_02: So we ended up picking the 955 to Gatwick, which is like absolutely nowhere near where I live in northeast London.
1:34
SPEAKER_02: Um, and of course, as is as is always the way with these things, um, it was delayed.
1:43
SPEAKER_01: But it wasn't that badly delayed, like the delay was fine.
1:47
SPEAKER_01: It was just that when we were trying to get off the plane, the pilot called up everyone and was like, yo, sorry guys, there's no buses to take you to the terminal.
1:58
SPEAKER_01: And we were like, What the hell do you mean, sir?
2:01
SPEAKER_01: What do you mean?
2:02
SPEAKER_01: And he was like, Oh, there's just no buses, like, we've run out of drivers because it's late, all this stuff, and we were just like, fuck's sake.
2:09
SPEAKER_01: Anyway, he told us it was gonna be 15 minutes.
2:11
SPEAKER_01: We waited like 10 minutes.
2:12
SPEAKER_01: He calls up again to everyone, and he's like, More bad news, it's gonna be another 45.
2:18
SPEAKER_02: This is where um there was almost a riot on the plane.
2:21
SPEAKER_02: First of all, he's like, Um, hi guys, um, bad news.
2:27
SPEAKER_02: You know, when they say that and it's like, I'm already seeing red.
2:30
SPEAKER_01: I'm already livid.
2:32
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, like I'm ready to kind of jump someone, I'm ready to like run in there in the cockpit and just kind of brandish my fist at him.
2:38
SPEAKER_02: Anyway, so um then he's like, Yeah, we've got a bit of an issue.
2:42
SPEAKER_02: We've got a couple of drivers off sick at the moment, and um basically we don't have enough drivers to pick anyone up from their planes, so we've had to call in recruits from Luton.
2:54
SPEAKER_01: When he said Luton, I was like, I was like, have we landed in Luton?
3:00
SPEAKER_01: I was so confused.
3:01
SPEAKER_01: I'm sorry.
3:09
SPEAKER_02: I was just like, that'd be fantastic.
3:11
SPEAKER_02: I was just like, I can't believe we're in Luton.
3:14
SPEAKER_02: No, but then you know, Luton's like a good hour away.
3:18
SPEAKER_02: So I was like, wow, this is not okay.
3:22
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
3:22
SPEAKER_02: At this point, like we've waved goodbye to any kind of Gatwick Express situation.
3:27
SPEAKER_02: You guys we weren't getting the train.
3:29
SPEAKER_02: Well, I mean, I was obviously having to get the train because I fucking looked up an Uber and it was like a hundred pounds.
3:34
SPEAKER_02: I was like, for fuck's sake.
3:36
SPEAKER_02: And then some random guy on the train was like, anyone go to Finsbury Park?
3:40
SPEAKER_02: And Lizzie was our friend Lizzie, the bride was like, Oh, she is, and I was like, Lizzie, shut up.
3:46
SPEAKER_02: I was like, go with them, go with them.
3:48
SPEAKER_02: I was like, I'd rather walk than get in that random man's cab for three hours across London.
3:54
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, there were these like kind of drunk guys on there who actually like seemed quite sweet, but definitely were drunk, and um they were like like sitting down, like talking to like they were like handing out waters to people, like they were like to one girl, like what then one of them must have lived in Brixton and was like speaking to a woman said, Don't worry, come in my cab.
4:13
SPEAKER_01: And then she was like, Where do you live when I'm here?
4:15
SPEAKER_01: was like, you know where the Mackeys is on the corner, and I was like, I love this.
4:18
SPEAKER_01: It's just like a universal like direction, like the Mackeys in in Brixton.
4:23
SPEAKER_01: Um, anyway, so we got off the plane and like raced through and me, our friend Lizzie, and someone else were all going back south.
4:30
SPEAKER_01: So we were like, right, we'll get a cab.
4:32
SPEAKER_01: Obviously, it took so long to get a cab because everyone had missed their trains, like they were all doing the same thing, but we did eventually get one.
4:37
SPEAKER_01: So I got home at about half one, which wasn't like the end of the world, because I was the nearest to Gatwick, so I was the first stop, which was you lucky bitch.
4:46
SPEAKER_02: Fantastic.
4:47
SPEAKER_02: I was sick.
4:47
SPEAKER_02: I was literally arriving in fucking King's Cross at like 2.45, and you were like, in bed.
4:53
SPEAKER_02: I was like, fuck you, shut up.
4:55
SPEAKER_01: Jules like ran to get the train to London Bridge, and she was like, It's so packed.
5:00
SPEAKER_01: But also we were cracking up in the taxi because you'd text Tori, who was like the other person in our cab, um, being like, Okay, what do you think of these hinge photos?
5:10
SPEAKER_01: She was like, It's not the time, Jules.
5:12
SPEAKER_01: It's like half one in the morning.
5:14
SPEAKER_01: I was like, She's obviously on the train, like, what can I do with myself?
5:18
SPEAKER_02: Well, literally, I had an hour to kill, so I was like, I bought myself a Snickers.
5:22
SPEAKER_02: Bearing in mind, we'd all like I probably had already consumed about 7,600 calories that day.
5:27
SPEAKER_02: We did we'd had a class one to start, then we had pizzas, then I ate all of Lizzie's Tang Tastics, then we had an ice cream, then I had like a cheese cheese toasty, and what basically like a full baguette.
5:40
SPEAKER_01: And then it was kind of just like a normal day of holiday in fairness.
5:44
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I know, but like then I was like, okay, I'm absolutely stuffed.
5:47
SPEAKER_02: Like, I definitely don't need anything else.
5:48
SPEAKER_02: And I was like, actually, do you know what?
5:49
SPEAKER_02: If I'm gonna get through this, I need a Snickers.
5:52
SPEAKER_02: I need a fucking Snickers.
5:53
SPEAKER_01: I got Snickers.
5:53
SPEAKER_01: I still can't eat them since barley.
5:55
SPEAKER_01: Oh my god.
5:56
SPEAKER_01: Still have not, I've still have not eaten the Snickers.
5:58
SPEAKER_01: Actually, I've had an ice I've had an ice cream Snickers, but it kind of feels like a different font.
6:03
SPEAKER_02: And it's also it's also just not as good.
6:05
SPEAKER_02: Um, just to God, now we have to give context.
6:09
SPEAKER_02: Me and Hannah got so drunk one night.
6:11
SPEAKER_02: We basically went on this like No, we think we were spiked.
6:15
SPEAKER_02: We often think we're spiked.
6:18
SPEAKER_02: It's become a bit of a pattern.
6:20
SPEAKER_02: Um no, but okay, we've got loads to get through.
6:24
SPEAKER_02: So basically, we got really, really drunk and we're on a night out in Bali where we decided to go like travelling, which basically just travelling around Bali, which by the way, you can get from one end to the other in under two hours.
6:36
SPEAKER_01: Travel traveled by car, travelled by Uber.
6:39
SPEAKER_03: Travelling by Uber from like town to town, which was like a big thing.
6:42
SPEAKER_01: No, there wasn't Uber then, but it just cabs.
6:44
SPEAKER_01: Anyway, we got really, really drunk and lost our minds, both of us blacked out.
6:49
SPEAKER_02: Hannah was throwing it outside the out of the window, and it was just smeared down down the side of the cab.
6:56
SPEAKER_01: Disgusting.
6:57
SPEAKER_01: Um, and then we for some reason had Snickers and got up, woke up in the morning.
7:03
SPEAKER_01: I had a Snickers stuck to my face.
7:05
SPEAKER_01: There was sick on the floor in the room.
7:09
SPEAKER_01: This was a big one.
7:09
SPEAKER_01: Which is obviously mine.
7:13
SPEAKER_01: We felt so ill after it, and we decided to get a massage, which for some reason was the weirdest choice ever.
7:18
SPEAKER_01: Well, because they're quite aggressive.
7:20
SPEAKER_01: Quite aggressive.
7:21
SPEAKER_01: And then do you remember we went out and got like a soup, and it was like it tasted like tomato ketchup?
7:26
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah.
7:26
SPEAKER_02: Oh my god, yeah.
7:27
SPEAKER_02: Why the fuck we would get a soup, I have no idea.
7:30
SPEAKER_02: We were in we were on some strange health kick, and I think it's maybe we got a bit carried away because everything there is kind of like it was like the beginning of the whole kind of vegan era, like clean girls, and we were like, oh my god, we like can't eat anything other than like a smoothie.
7:43
SPEAKER_02: But then we'd go out and get like paralytically drunk.
7:46
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, and then try any of Snickers.
7:48
SPEAKER_02: Anyway, long story short, I got our Snickers, I arrive in King's Cross, it's like three.
7:53
SPEAKER_02: At this point, it's three, you know, when you're just like so past the point of a sense of humour failure that you're just I was basically just on like full autopilot.
8:01
SPEAKER_02: I was like, just get just get home, just get home, just get home.
8:04
SPEAKER_02: Anyway, then I get this Uber and I'm like ready to have, you know, like a night.
8:10
SPEAKER_02: I'm really excited to get in there.
8:11
SPEAKER_02: It's gonna be warm, it's gonna be comforting, he's gonna just take me home, he's gonna be my knight in shining armour.
8:15
SPEAKER_02: I open the door and he's like, What are you doing?
8:18
SPEAKER_02: And I'm like, What?
8:20
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, and I was like, What do you mean?
8:22
SPEAKER_02: And he was like, Oh my god, please be careful with the door.
8:27
unknown: I was like, please.
8:29
SPEAKER_02: I'm like, sir, this is not what I need right now.
8:31
SPEAKER_02: I don't need this attitude right now.
8:34
SPEAKER_02: So then I'm like, get in the car, and as I get in the car, he's saying something really sternly, and I don't hear it.
8:41
SPEAKER_02: And then I kind of like close the door quite loudly, and he goes, I just said don't slam the door.
8:46
SPEAKER_02: And I was like, I just couldn't even bother to respond.
8:49
SPEAKER_02: I just went, okay.
8:50
SPEAKER_02: Terrified.
8:51
unknown: Yeah.
8:51
SPEAKER_02: And then like he it just persisted.
8:53
SPEAKER_02: He was really in a bad mood, I have to say.
8:56
SPEAKER_02: And then when I got out of the cab, he basically just grunted and I grunted back, and then I kind of hobbled through the door.
9:01
SPEAKER_02: And then I was like, this was the low of the low.
9:04
SPEAKER_02: So I then was like looking through the cupboards, didn't need anything, like, did not need to eat anything else.
9:08
SPEAKER_02: And then I stumbled across Flow's Tony's chocolate, and I was like, Do you know what I deserve?
9:15
SPEAKER_02: The rest of this at like 4 a.m.
9:21
SPEAKER_03: Oh my god.
9:22
SPEAKER_02: I know.
9:24
SPEAKER_02: So yeah, we weren't feeling great, but let's um backtrack, let's rewind.
9:28
SPEAKER_02: Let's backtrack 72 hours.
9:30
SPEAKER_02: So, okay, we're not really going to be talking about a huge amount of pop culture, we're just gonna be telling you about like what we got up to because I think it it deserves a retell, don't you?
9:38
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
9:39
SPEAKER_02: So, okay, let's start from the beginning.
9:41
SPEAKER_02: So our friend was having a handy with Marseille.
9:43
SPEAKER_02: You'd been to Marseille, I'd never been, so I was quite excited to like see what the vibe is.
9:47
SPEAKER_02: Obviously, everyone got really overexcited.
9:49
SPEAKER_02: We'd gotten up early.
9:51
SPEAKER_02: Like, obviously, we were being, you know, girls are a bit more demure, so we weren't like binge drinking in the like spoons from from 6 a.m.
9:58
SPEAKER_01: But you know, like I did try and get Lizzie's chewing.
10:01
SPEAKER_01: She was like, I actually just want a coffee and a porridge.
10:03
SPEAKER_01: And I was like, I mean, fair enough.
10:06
SPEAKER_02: I mean, so did I, it was delicious.
10:09
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
10:09
SPEAKER_02: So we arrive, we're everyone's having a great time.
10:12
SPEAKER_02: We go for swimming, it's very wholesome.
10:15
SPEAKER_01: We all swim, we get shambrising in the fishing village, it's lovely, gorgeous.
10:19
SPEAKER_01: We go back to the hotel, we get ready, we go for dinner, we're on the fizzy wine, it's all great, it's all glorious.
10:26
SPEAKER_02: Well, I left my bikini at the beach.
10:28
SPEAKER_02: Oh, yeah.
10:29
SPEAKER_02: So everyone else was getting ready and having sunset cocktails, and I was basically having to take a half an hour trip like detour back to where we started.
10:39
SPEAKER_02: Anyway, so by the time we're all out, um we're at this gorgeous restaurant, everyone's in a great mood, it's very kind of cool, vibey.
10:50
SPEAKER_02: We're having some braised leeks.
10:52
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, it's kind of bar blanc.
10:54
SPEAKER_02: Oh, it was all very chic.
10:56
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, it was very chic.
10:58
SPEAKER_02: And then obviously dinner ended, and we were like, well, obviously, we're gonna have to bring the tone down a bit.
11:03
SPEAKER_02: Like what I'm fucking hen to.
11:06
SPEAKER_02: So we strolled to this area called the Corps Julianne or Julianne.
11:11
SPEAKER_02: Um, anyway, so we had this round of bar, we're kind of all downing our tequilas, like Hannah was defrauding the hen kitty.
11:18
SPEAKER_02: Um and Hannah had put herself in charge of the hen kitty under the guise of kind of wanting to help out.
11:26
SPEAKER_02: Little did everyone know that it was just so she could have direct access to all the funds.
11:32
SPEAKER_02: Oh my god, no.
11:34
SPEAKER_02: She was like, shots?
11:35
SPEAKER_02: It's on me, guys.
11:36
SPEAKER_02: And I was like, I think you'll find it's on all of us, and half of us aren't aren't even drinking that.
11:41
SPEAKER_01: Oh I did.
11:42
SPEAKER_01: I was like, I'm gonna get a round of shots on the on the pot.
11:46
SPEAKER_03: No, you did not say on the pot.
11:48
SPEAKER_03: You whispered to me on the pot.
11:51
SPEAKER_03: And I was like, go for it.
11:53
SPEAKER_01: Everyone was happy, everyone got a short that they all put money in for apart from all the pregnant women who weren't drinking.
12:02
SPEAKER_01: It wasn't that much, they were like two euros each, but anyway, sure.
12:05
SPEAKER_02: By the bye sorry, I didn't mean to out you there.
12:07
SPEAKER_01: Um as a fraud.
12:09
SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna be in one of those Netflix documentaries where they're like the Henu boards.
12:15
SPEAKER_01: The Hendu scammer.
12:16
SPEAKER_03: The hen do scammer, you just go on loads of handus and charge everyone millions of pounds, and it's all just going into your talk, you're in your tarot card fine hustle.
12:27
SPEAKER_03: I'm giving them a fucking service.
12:29
SPEAKER_02: Anyway, okay.
12:31
SPEAKER_02: So we're so we're knocking back the tequila's, the hen kitty's depleting at a suspiciously quick rate.
12:37
SPEAKER_01: It was one of those like night, you know, we we leave dinner and we're like weirdly sober, like this is not okay from day one of the Hendi.
12:44
SPEAKER_01: Like, let's just get shots, let's just get whatever.
12:46
SPEAKER_01: And then in the space of like 15 minutes, we were then all like paralytic.
12:51
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
12:51
SPEAKER_02: Han kept going, I want to get lit.
12:54
SPEAKER_01: And I was like, I was like, I want to get lit.
12:56
SPEAKER_01: I want to get lit.
12:57
SPEAKER_02: I want to get litty.
12:58
SPEAKER_02: And I was like, I'm I I'm I'm sorry to burst job off, but you are and you were like, Oh my god, I'm so bored of standing in the street.
13:06
SPEAKER_02: Can we just go to that bar across across the street and buy another shot?
13:09
SPEAKER_02: And I was like, Oh, it looks like an once it looks like a wake in there.
13:14
SPEAKER_02: The vibe is so bad, but you were like, it looks great, it looks great.
13:18
SPEAKER_02: There was like three old men sort of like lightly gyrated.
13:21
SPEAKER_01: Isn't that a complete lie?
13:23
SPEAKER_01: There was the whole plate, there was no like old men in the whole place.
13:26
SPEAKER_01: There was, there was.
13:27
SPEAKER_01: It was all young people.
13:28
SPEAKER_02: It wasn't, it was very bad vibes.
13:30
SPEAKER_02: Anyway, we went in there, I just got another shot, and at this point, Lizzie the hen had befriended this random American man who it transpires she was actually gonna be in the same meeting as at a meeting that she has today in New York, which she's had to fly to now.
13:51
SPEAKER_02: And this guy'll be in the air right now.
13:53
SPEAKER_03: She's literally in the air.
13:55
SPEAKER_02: This guy called Timothy.
13:56
SPEAKER_02: Anyway, Timothy was like, I'm from New York, and like, you know, I'm a really cool guy.
14:01
SPEAKER_02: And he was wearing like one earring, and he was like, Oh my god, if my office saw me wearing this, I would be fired.
14:08
SPEAKER_02: He was like, they don't even know me, they don't know what I'm like.
14:11
SPEAKER_01: And we were like, crazy, crazy Timmy.
14:14
SPEAKER_01: Um, they flew to Marseille for the weekend.
14:17
SPEAKER_01: I was like, that's insane.
14:18
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, and then anyway, so then they became essentially our our I guess our entourage.
14:25
SPEAKER_02: So Timmy, his friend Jerry, and this other guy whose name I can't remember, um, were just basically accosting us for the rest of the night whilst things kind of just got more and more strange.
14:36
SPEAKER_02: Um anyway.
14:38
SPEAKER_01: Anyway, we danced, we drank more, we were just having a great time.
14:43
SPEAKER_01: And then I guess at like, I don't know what time, two?
14:47
SPEAKER_02: Must have been about two, yeah.
14:48
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, we like went, we were like, look, we're hungry, let's go get like a slice of pizza, and we like still wanted to go out, so we were like, let's like figure out what we want to do after.
14:56
SPEAKER_01: But we're like, let's like get a slice of pizza, and like you know, means we can like have a bit more clarity and then we can figure out where we want to go.
15:07
SPEAKER_02: And this won't mean you had a small altercation.
15:09
SPEAKER_02: Do you remember?
15:09
SPEAKER_02: Because I was like, You're behaving really irrationally right now, and you were like, I'm not irrational.
15:14
SPEAKER_02: You were like screaming.
15:15
SPEAKER_02: I don't remember this.
15:16
SPEAKER_02: What?
15:17
SPEAKER_02: And I was like, Han, no offense.
15:19
SPEAKER_02: This is the tequila talking.
15:21
SPEAKER_02: We all become a bit irrational, but then we were but then we just moved on from it secondly.
15:26
SPEAKER_01: Why was I why was I being irrational?
15:28
SPEAKER_01: I can't remember.
15:29
SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna stop.
15:30
SPEAKER_01: I don't remember that at all.
15:32
SPEAKER_01: Um interesting, interesting information.
15:36
SPEAKER_01: Um, anyway, so the music in the pizza shop was absolutely unreal.
15:41
SPEAKER_01: Me and Lizzie and Tink were like literally having the time of our lives, like literally dancing around.
15:46
SPEAKER_02: Like Jason DeRulo.
15:49
SPEAKER_02: And I was like, this is really not that great, guys.
15:52
SPEAKER_01: It was like Jason, oh yours so it was so annoying.
15:56
SPEAKER_01: Go away.
15:57
SPEAKER_01: It was like Justin Timberlake, it was like pussycat dolls, it was just like all the buying that you want on like a hen too.
16:03
SPEAKER_01: We were like, Can't believe we found it in the pizza shop.
16:06
SPEAKER_01: Um, so we were like dancing around, Lizzie was by the drinks cabinet, and she just kept on like opening it and like grabbing like grabbing bottles of wine and just drinking them without paying.
16:17
SPEAKER_02: Um, but also can I just caveat this by saying this pizza shop was not this kind of like welcoming, like free-for-all atmosphere that maybe like we hoped it was.
16:27
SPEAKER_02: Like the owner was kind of death staring us from the counter.
16:32
SPEAKER_02: We were very much not welcome there, and there was definitely a kind of ominous vibe about the establishment.
16:37
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, which obviously we didn't clock because we were because we were because we were being the state we were in um because of the tequila.
16:45
SPEAKER_02: So I walked off and I was like, because at this stage I was really trying not to eat gluten.
16:49
SPEAKER_02: Obviously, the next day I ate like three loaves of bread, but I was like, I can't have a pizza.
16:54
SPEAKER_02: So found this kebab shop like a couple of stores down, bought what I can't even I can barely even say it out loud, but I couldn't get the I couldn't get the kebab because obviously I was still worried about the gluten, so I got like a kebab salad, which was basically just like tiny shavings of mystery meat and like just of all kind of like rainbow shades of brown.
17:17
SPEAKER_02: Um, I couldn't tell you what the meat was, I couldn't tell you what anyway, it was disgusting.
17:22
SPEAKER_02: But as I was stood there, this random guy in a wife beater was like, Hey, where are you going?
17:28
SPEAKER_02: He wasn't American.
17:28
SPEAKER_02: I don't know why I did that exactly.
17:30
SPEAKER_02: He was French.
17:30
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, he was French.
17:32
SPEAKER_02: And I was like, I don't know, but I think we're up for a bit of a party.
17:35
SPEAKER_02: And he was like, Who are you with?
17:36
SPEAKER_02: And I'm like, really, really hot girls.
17:38
SPEAKER_02: And he was like, Oh my god, come to our party.
17:41
SPEAKER_02: We're DJing it at this club called Baby Club.
17:43
SPEAKER_02: And I was like, oh my god, what a great idea! Like, come on, like, come on, guys.
17:49
SPEAKER_03: Come on.
17:50
SPEAKER_03: So we come over to the pizza shop.
17:52
SPEAKER_02: And anyway, at this point, I'm like, I need something to eat the kebab salad with.
17:57
SPEAKER_02: So I go over to the pizza guy and I'm like, you know, do you have a utensil?
18:00
SPEAKER_02: And he said he didn't have a single utensil in the establishment.
18:03
SPEAKER_02: So then he pulled out a dirty spoon that had been in the old tzatziki pot, wiped it on his apron, and then handed it over to me, still crusted with old tatsiki.
18:17
SPEAKER_01: That is disgusting.
18:19
SPEAKER_03: And then I proceeded to use that to eat my kebab salad and then dropped it on the floor about three times and then had to pick it back up.
18:28
SPEAKER_02: Anyway, so things were going, things were already going south.
18:31
SPEAKER_02: We finished the salads, we finished the pizzas, we start walking in some some direction towards this club.
18:37
SPEAKER_02: Okay, Hannah, oh this is when things got really crazy.
18:42
SPEAKER_01: So yeah, we're like fanning around, kind of like loitering, like as you do when you're trying to gather, like, because we somehow were with this group of French people, which consisted of like three guys and two girls, and you're like gathering people up, whatever.
18:53
SPEAKER_01: We were like, let's go to the baby club, and we were in the crowd of people, and like this man just like comes up to me and grabs my neck, like literally like this.
19:04
SPEAKER_01: And then I think what happened was I like obviously at a reflex, like jolted backwards, and then in that moment, he like grabbed my necklace and like literally ripped it off my neck.
19:16
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, and I was like so affronted that this person had like so brazenly done this that I quite literally lost my mind.
19:25
SPEAKER_01: I obviously was like completely in shock.
19:27
SPEAKER_01: Obviously, that was like shocking and not a nice thing to happen to anyone, and obviously, really aggressive of like a man to grab your neck, but because I was drunk, I just went, I literally saw red and I was so angry, and I quite literally pounced on this man.
19:42
SPEAKER_01: Pat pounced, like you jumped on top of him, literally jumped on top of him, just I was like, give me my fucking necklace back, give me my necklace back.
19:50
SPEAKER_02: You were clawing at his face.
19:52
SPEAKER_02: I have never seen anything like it.
19:54
SPEAKER_02: I've actually never, you know, the word feral, like it was invented for that moment.
19:58
SPEAKER_02: Like you you were it was animalistic, you were like pouncing, clawing, slapping.
20:04
SPEAKER_02: Hannah ripped his shirt in two, and this man, he was just there kind of taking it, which is quite funny.
20:11
SPEAKER_01: I felt like I was like the Hulk, and he like ripped his shirt like in two of his body, and then like basically pinned him to the floor, and then basically like turned his pockets inside out and his shoe to like shoes to try and like see if like no came.
20:24
SPEAKER_02: No, no, you didn't pin him to the floor.
20:26
SPEAKER_02: Okay, let's let's not let's not pretend you were jumping all over him, but you weren't really getting anywhere.
20:33
SPEAKER_02: And then the guys who were apparently these superstar DJs who I'd met at the kebab shop, then obviously were like, What's going on here?
20:39
SPEAKER_02: And Hannah was just like this piercing noise was coming out of her mouth, and the whole thing was quite stressful, and so they they were like, Oh my god, what happened, what happened?
20:48
SPEAKER_02: So they started trying to find the necklace on this guy as well.
20:51
SPEAKER_02: So at this point, he's pinned to the ground.
20:53
SPEAKER_01: We're all rifling through his pockets and his shoes as he's like trying to get up, and then we were like looking on the ground to like try and find my necklace, but it wasn't anywhere.
21:05
SPEAKER_01: He must have just like dashed it to someone so quickly, anyway.
21:08
SPEAKER_01: So then I kind of got off omitting defeat, and I was just like obviously upset.
21:12
SPEAKER_01: And then like the French guys like took it so far and were literally like wiping him up on the guy on the street, yeah.
21:18
SPEAKER_02: So punching him and kicking him at this point.
21:20
SPEAKER_02: He was just like, we'd given up.
21:22
SPEAKER_02: Everyone was like, oh, whatever, just leave it.
21:24
SPEAKER_02: He doesn't have it.
21:25
SPEAKER_02: But then this is when it turned into a full street brawl.
21:29
SPEAKER_02: People from across the street, people from across the street were running over.
21:33
SPEAKER_02: These French guys were beating up this guy.
21:36
SPEAKER_01: I was thinking him on the street.
21:37
SPEAKER_02: I was I was defending the thief.
21:40
SPEAKER_01: I was like, get off him, get off him.
21:42
SPEAKER_01: In fair, in fairness, I did as well.
21:44
SPEAKER_01: I was like, don't like hurt him.
21:46
SPEAKER_01: Like, obviously, like we don't want anyone to be like, no, I no, Jules.
21:50
SPEAKER_02: I was I was very much at this point had switched thumbs up.
21:53
SPEAKER_01: At this point, Jules was the thief's ally.
21:56
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I was like stood over him, protecting him.
21:59
SPEAKER_03: I was like, get.
22:00
SPEAKER_03: Away from him.
22:00
SPEAKER_01: But none of us wanted him to be hurt or anything.
22:03
SPEAKER_01: Like, all I wanted was the necklace back.
22:05
SPEAKER_01: So, like, none of us wanted him to be hurt.
22:07
SPEAKER_01: They were literally kicking him in the street.
22:09
SPEAKER_01: It was absolutely horrible.
22:10
SPEAKER_01: And we were just like, please, please, please stop.
22:12
SPEAKER_01: Like, literally, everyone get off.
22:13
SPEAKER_01: Anyway, that kind of like came to a close.
22:16
SPEAKER_01: And then someone in the pizza place, our favourite club of the night.
22:20
SPEAKER_02: The owner of the pizza restaurant.
22:21
SPEAKER_02: No, so that the thief ran off, right?
22:24
SPEAKER_02: Then he came back from the pizza restaurant with a couple of cronies.
22:30
SPEAKER_02: And then the guy who owned the pizza restaurant, who'd given me the dirty spoon, started throwing bottles, glass bottles at us across the street.
22:38
SPEAKER_02: And Tink, our friend Tink, was like on the verge of tears, was like, please when we leave, like this is pretty good.
22:44
SPEAKER_02: Loads of people on the street were also involved now in this fight.
22:46
SPEAKER_02: I then was running behind these the wife eater guy, like trying to get him off the thief again because he was trying to get involved again.
22:54
SPEAKER_02: It was awful.
22:55
SPEAKER_02: And then we were like, then we were just kind of left.
22:58
SPEAKER_02: We were like, I don't think we're gonna make it, guys.
23:00
SPEAKER_02: They were like, Oh, come on, okay, we'll come to Paris and see us tomorrow.
23:05
SPEAKER_02: We were like, I really don't think we're gonna make it.
23:07
SPEAKER_02: Um I think we're gonna go home.
23:10
SPEAKER_01: I just don't think we're gonna make it to Paris tomorrow.
23:12
SPEAKER_03: Lizzie, all about and then Lizzie just sat there in the back of her the Hendy, obviously it's her Hendi, sat at the back of the cab, just kind of staring sadly into the distance.
23:21
SPEAKER_01: Like a sparkly dress.
23:23
SPEAKER_01: Anyway, so we got back, and to be fair, like you know, we like I was in pretty good spirits about it the next day.
23:31
SPEAKER_01: I was just like, at the end of the day, like there was nothing I could have done in that situation, like literally nothing I could have done.
23:38
SPEAKER_01: Like, it's not like I was pickpocketed or anything.
23:41
SPEAKER_01: Um, and like, you know, obviously it had sentimental value, and that's really annoying.
23:47
SPEAKER_01: But at least I wasn't like her or anything like that.
23:50
SPEAKER_02: No, no, yeah.
23:52
SPEAKER_02: But then, but then the next day we woke up and we thought we were just going for a walk to the beach, but it turned out that this like leisurely stroll to one of the clanks was, I think I want to say a 1.5 hour each way sort of rock climb.
24:06
SPEAKER_02: Like it's that's not even an exaggeration.
24:08
SPEAKER_02: Like, it was actually kind of dangerous.
24:10
SPEAKER_02: We had like pregnant women with us, all of us were wearing flip-flops, and then as we began the walk, or should I say, like scale, this man came up to us and was like, Oh my gosh, like, what are you doing?
24:23
SPEAKER_02: It's very dangerous.
24:24
SPEAKER_02: No, you cannot do it in your shoes, like it's too dangerous, it's really hard.
24:29
SPEAKER_02: And we were like, What?
24:31
SPEAKER_01: What anyway?
24:33
SPEAKER_01: The annoying thing is is that like we were told to bring trainers, and I did.
24:38
SPEAKER_01: I brought trainers with me, so did Tink.
24:40
SPEAKER_01: And um, but on the morning, Jules was like, Honestly, guys, you won't need them.
24:46
SPEAKER_02: And we were like, I was like, it's such overkill.
24:49
SPEAKER_02: Like, honestly, it's kind of a bit cringe that you'd even try and wear the all the gear with no idea.
24:54
SPEAKER_01: Anyway, she was like, You look way better without them on.
24:57
SPEAKER_01: I was like, okay, fine, okay, mind.
24:59
SPEAKER_02: Fast forward, us on our hands and knees trying to walk vertically up a cliff face in our hot pants and people walking past the.
25:12
SPEAKER_03: People had literally had those ski poles to try and to try and help them balance, and we didn't even have our arms because our arms were literally full of like bottles of water and like fucking sun creams and stuff.
25:24
SPEAKER_03: One of us had a paper bag that had ripped with all of her possessions that she was trying to keep together whilst also watching her footworking because she fell down the cliff.
25:34
SPEAKER_01: It was also like you guys were like chatting behind me, but I was kind of just like walking on my own because I was like, I need to be so careful where I'm putting my feet, like I have to concentrate.
25:43
SPEAKER_01: But also, all I was doing was picturing my Solomons in the hotel room, just like sitting there.
25:47
SPEAKER_01: I was like, So sad, so sad.
25:50
SPEAKER_01: This could be so much easier.
25:52
SPEAKER_01: Oh god.
25:53
SPEAKER_01: So, anyway, that on a hangover in the midday sun.
25:55
SPEAKER_01: No, no, but we forget the final hurdle.
25:59
SPEAKER_02: So then we eventually arrived at the fucking beach, and every single time that we checked our our Google Maps, it said that it was like, oh, 12 minutes left, but then we'd check the actual clock.
26:09
SPEAKER_02: Like, having walked like what you know it felt like a while, we'd check our clock and it would have been like half an hour since we last checked on the Google Maps, and we were still like 10 minutes away, so we were like walking for in the midday heat with no sun cream on.
26:24
SPEAKER_02: It must have been about an hour and 15 minutes.
26:26
SPEAKER_02: Anyway, we arrive at the beach.
26:27
SPEAKER_02: I've been complaining that I need the loo the whole time.
26:30
SPEAKER_02: Um we arrive at the restaurant, the restaurant's lovely, and I'm like, oh, brilliant.
26:34
SPEAKER_02: Okay, we can find relaxed.
26:35
SPEAKER_02: We can I'll go to the loo.
26:37
SPEAKER_02: On the door of the restaurant is a sign hanging saying, no toilet.
26:43
SPEAKER_02: So I was like, This is this is this is the last straw.
26:47
SPEAKER_02: You were so stressed.
26:49
SPEAKER_02: I was so stressed.
26:50
SPEAKER_02: I was like, I think I might shit myself, like this can't be, like, I can't stay.
26:54
SPEAKER_02: I'm gonna have to hike back immediately.
26:57
SPEAKER_02: Um, so then I was like, okay, well, I'll try and find like a secluded area.
27:01
SPEAKER_02: And then I'm walking across this like hill area, kind of just off the beach, and I suddenly see these swarms of flies everywhere, and I was like, what's this?
27:09
SPEAKER_02: This is gross.
27:10
SPEAKER_02: And I'm looking down at my flip-flops and I'm like, what am I standing in?
27:13
SPEAKER_02: And then I just see like this kind of graveyard of dried up poos, and I was like, that's I'm I was like, that's it, that's it.
27:21
SPEAKER_02: I'm not attempting anything.
27:23
SPEAKER_02: I'm gonna eat this food and then I'm going straight back to the fucking hotel.
27:28
SPEAKER_01: They later turned as Pooh Hill.
27:30
SPEAKER_02: It was Pooh Hill.
27:31
SPEAKER_02: Oh god, like I just can't believe that you wouldn't have a toilet at a fucking beach that's an hour away from civilization.
27:37
SPEAKER_01: I know it's crazy.
27:39
SPEAKER_01: Um, anyway, we had a really nice time.
27:41
SPEAKER_01: Julie's done tarot tarot card readings for everyone.
27:45
SPEAKER_01: Um, decided that she wants to do it as a side hustle.
27:47
SPEAKER_01: She just needs to actually learn what all of them are.
27:50
SPEAKER_01: Um, you were pretty good, you were pretty good, but we didn't have any internet, so we couldn't ask uh Chat GPT what all of them.
27:56
SPEAKER_02: I probably knew like one out of six cards.
27:59
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
28:00
SPEAKER_01: So then like pretty good going.
28:01
SPEAKER_02: Pretty good going.
28:02
SPEAKER_02: But then obviously kind of freestyle slightly, you know, just to like not let my street cred down on the others, and I'd be like, just I don't want to say anything too inflammatory or too worrisome, but you know, we need a bit of jeopardy, so every now and again I just have to be like, oh yeah, like you know, you're gonna have to change direction.
28:17
SPEAKER_02: Something's gonna come up that's gonna, you know, trigger some things, gonna have to really take stock.
28:23
SPEAKER_02: There was quite a lot of like betrayals.
28:25
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, wanna say me like not being too inflammatory.
28:29
SPEAKER_02: You're gonna be betrayed very soon by someone you love.
28:34
SPEAKER_01: It was the bride's one about her marriage.
28:38
unknown: Oh my god.
28:40
SPEAKER_01: You'd be like, okay, some kind of some kind of betrayal or lie here.
28:44
SPEAKER_01: But do you want it's not all bad.
28:46
SPEAKER_02: But do you know what?
28:47
SPEAKER_02: It's fine because we've got this car, which means that things are all gonna work out in the end.
28:50
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
28:52
SPEAKER_01: Um so that's gonna be Jules's latest uh job adventure.
28:57
SPEAKER_01: My my ninth job.
28:58
SPEAKER_01: Umway, so we like head back to the hotel, get ready again, go.
29:05
SPEAKER_01: Oh no, oh my god.
29:06
SPEAKER_01: And that's so we get back to the hotel, and that's when we find the USB stick in your bag.
29:11
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, so I'm like rivaling through my bag and I suddenly see this like blue, quite big contraption.
29:16
SPEAKER_02: It was quite big, it was it wasn't small.
29:18
SPEAKER_02: And I was like, what the fuck is this?
29:19
SPEAKER_02: Thinking maybe I'd nick someone's lighter the night before.
29:22
SPEAKER_02: And then I was like, hang on, it's not a lighter, and like clicking these buttons on it, and it's it's like a USB stick, an old school USB stick with like really weird buttons on it playing being like play.
29:31
SPEAKER_02: Which is which just feels like it's almost like a video.
29:33
SPEAKER_02: Oh my god, it's so creepy.
29:35
SPEAKER_02: It's creepy, and you know, when you just get like a really weird vibe, I was like, I just I just don't think that I would have picked that up.
29:41
SPEAKER_02: Like I didn't think it was a lighter or something, it didn't look like it, like it wasn't like the same size as a lighter or anything, like it was very obviously like and like no part of me on the night was like I didn't black, like I I could remember everything.
29:55
SPEAKER_02: I wasn't like sloppy mess.
29:56
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
29:57
SPEAKER_02: So I was like, what the hell?
29:59
SPEAKER_02: Like I feel like someone slipped that in my bag.
30:01
SPEAKER_02: I just had this really weird feeling that they didn't.
30:03
SPEAKER_02: It just felt very ominous.
30:04
SPEAKER_02: And obviously, me and Ting were like, well, let's obviously chuck it in the laptop.
30:08
SPEAKER_02: And then I was like, hang on, let me just chat GBT at first, just to be on the same site.
30:11
SPEAKER_02: Anyway, chat GBT was like, don't even touch it, wash your hands after touching it.
30:17
SPEAKER_02: And it was like quite often, it's like a thing that scammers do, or like um, I guess like thieves do to like they want you to put it in one of your like a laptop or something, and then it basically really releases like a virus on your computer that they can like hack you.
30:31
SPEAKER_03: I was like, fucking hell, I do not feel safe.
30:34
SPEAKER_03: I feel so on edge.
30:36
SPEAKER_03: I was like, we went out for dinner, and I was like holding this fucking USB stick wrapped in a tissue, trying to find a pin so I could just it was when you brought it into the room, like the Mr.
30:47
SPEAKER_01: and Mrs.
30:47
SPEAKER_01: like wrapped up in a tissue, and everyone was like, What are you doing?
30:50
SPEAKER_01: Is this the US is this the USB for the for the Mr.
30:53
SPEAKER_01: and Mrs.
30:54
SPEAKER_01: video?
30:54
SPEAKER_01: Um, and everyone was like, put it in the computer, and we were like, No, no, don't do it.
31:00
SPEAKER_02: And I was like, no, we've got to get rid of it.
31:02
SPEAKER_02: And they were like, just track it in the bin in the bathroom.
31:04
SPEAKER_02: I was like, no, no, no, no, this has got to go far away.
31:06
SPEAKER_02: Like far from far.
31:08
SPEAKER_02: I've seen slow horses.
31:09
SPEAKER_02: I know, I know this rodeo.
31:11
SPEAKER_01: Jules was convinced it was like someone was tracking her, and I was like, I don't think there's like any tracking going on.
31:16
SPEAKER_01: Like, I don't know how that would happen.
31:18
SPEAKER_01: It's a piece of metal, but I do agree we should throw it in the bin, yeah, far away from us.
31:22
SPEAKER_02: I don't know what it is.
31:23
SPEAKER_02: I find like the scammers and like hacking like really scary.
31:26
SPEAKER_02: I I think maybe it's because I don't really understand technology, but I just think this whole idea of like blackmailing, because if you think about it, like everything about you is on your computer, everything, like every picture you've ever taken, every conversation you've ever had.
31:38
SPEAKER_02: I just know, I just think like, can you imagine if that like you know when remember when Jennifer Lawrence got her like remember there was that Sony hacking thing?
31:45
SPEAKER_01: No, I know, but it's not I mean obviously and I'm not Jennifer Lawrence, but I don't but the paranoia about it is like there.
31:52
SPEAKER_01: I get I get I completely get you, but I guess like m like and you have such a trigger about it, but in my head I'm like nothing I have is like I mean, apart from like passwords to all my stuff, like nothing from my personal life is like um like I'm not worth anything for like blackmail over or anything, like what they're gonna get out of me.
32:14
SPEAKER_02: It doesn't make any sense.
32:15
SPEAKER_01: I think it's just I feel like I've got like four pounds in my bank account, like what exactly are they gonna get?
32:19
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
32:20
SPEAKER_02: I know what you mean.
32:21
SPEAKER_02: I know what you mean.
32:21
SPEAKER_02: I think it's because it just feels so so it's I it's so a world that I don't understand that I find it like so insidious and scary.
32:30
SPEAKER_02: I'm like, what are these people doing?
32:31
SPEAKER_02: Like anyway, long story short, we then obviously are back.
32:37
SPEAKER_02: Feeling I'm gonna say worse for wear.
32:39
SPEAKER_02: I don't know about you.
32:41
SPEAKER_01: My god, yeah, I like had to have a nap and take a migraine pill.
32:45
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, oh my god, no, we need to talk about that.
32:47
SPEAKER_02: So Han is really prone to migraines, and I think what we've established is that um you well, as Lizzie w put it well, in terms of like going out and drinking, like mentally I'm there, but physically I'm not.
33:02
SPEAKER_01: Like my body cannot hack it at all.
33:04
SPEAKER_01: Like, I calm down with the migraine, I calm down with the stomach thing.
33:08
SPEAKER_01: Like there's always some kind of issue.
33:10
SPEAKER_01: Like, I'm dehydrated, I have to nap.
33:12
SPEAKER_01: Like, honestly, I took like three migraine pills in the space of like less than two days.
33:17
SPEAKER_01: Um, I had to go back to the hotel lobby yesterday and waited for four hours with a mint tea whilst they waited for everyone to like finish their lovely day on the beach.
33:25
SPEAKER_01: It was just like I just can't hack it.
33:27
SPEAKER_01: But like mentally, like I'm there.
33:30
SPEAKER_02: Mentally, you were there, but physically you were in complete disarray.
33:35
SPEAKER_02: We come back to the hotel and I just see this figure in the distance, like fully reclined with her fucking eye mask on in the fucking lobby, just like listening to some kind of crappy reality TV with this sprawled like table in front of her of various snacks and drinks.
33:55
SPEAKER_01: In all honesty, it was great.
33:56
SPEAKER_01: Like, I was I like in my head, the hotel lobby, because obviously we're checked out at this point.
34:00
SPEAKER_01: So this was yesterday, we're checked out 11.
34:03
SPEAKER_01: Our flight was at 10 pm.
34:04
SPEAKER_01: So we were like, God, we have a long time.
34:07
SPEAKER_01: Jules finally got, she was banging on about how she needed unstructured time all weekend, and I was like, here you go, it's you it's your unstructured time.
34:14
SPEAKER_01: You've got 11 hours of it, and then she was complaining about that, and I was like, Can't win.
34:18
SPEAKER_02: Um can we also just mention honorary mentioned to one of the the hens, Megan?
34:24
SPEAKER_02: So she's eight months pregnant, she did the two-hour hike both ways.
34:29
SPEAKER_03: There was not one complaint that that left her mouth.
34:33
SPEAKER_03: I I don't think there was one non-complaint that left either of our mouths.
34:40
SPEAKER_01: Honestly, it was inspiring to watch.
34:42
SPEAKER_01: I was I was changing inspiring.
34:44
SPEAKER_02: It was a real interesting mirror, actually, to like the real ass.
34:49
SPEAKER_02: I was like, wow.
34:50
SPEAKER_01: Also, like also just like she literally also got the train back because she was too pregnant to fly.
34:57
SPEAKER_01: And um, like she let like left the beach and was like just in like such a good mood and like not complaining, and then I was like literally with like a bandana over my eyes, like guys, I need to like just go back to the hotel lobby for five hours.
35:10
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, like I just can't be outside anymore.
35:15
SPEAKER_02: Oh my god, we're literally with pathetic.
35:17
SPEAKER_02: So all of us are now kind of like on an emotional calm down, and I just think like there is actually no greater joy or high than like being in close pro close proximity to a group of like your best girls or just like girls in general for like three or four days.
35:33
SPEAKER_01: It was just like honestly, so silly and like so fun, and just like everyone was so stupid, it was like perfect.
35:40
SPEAKER_02: But you know, it's just like your heart is so full that you feel like you're literally levitating, and then you go home and you're like everything is shit.
35:46
SPEAKER_02: I hate everything, I hate everyone.
35:49
SPEAKER_02: And it's like, what is this feeling?
35:50
SPEAKER_01: It's grief.
35:52
SPEAKER_01: We were saying we like wished we were like in a hotel somewhere, but like just like a really nice one, like a five-star hotel and like fluffy dressing gowns and like a bed with like a high thread count.
36:04
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
36:05
SPEAKER_02: With like maybe like I don't know about a colonic, but maybe just like an ivy drip and like loads of like sort of detox supplements.
36:13
SPEAKER_01: Do you remember then what um Reiki maybe?
36:16
SPEAKER_01: Um God, some Reiki would be gorgeous.
36:18
SPEAKER_01: Um, do you what was that um hotel we you got like a night free in in South Kensington and we stayed there and the bed was so big?
36:26
SPEAKER_01: Do you remember?
36:26
SPEAKER_02: Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.
36:28
SPEAKER_02: I remember I can't remember, but it was like yeah, it was like a press day.
36:32
SPEAKER_02: And me and Hannah just randomly went there of an evening, and then basically we're just drinking champagne or in bed, and then you had a bath and watched friends.
36:42
SPEAKER_01: Do you remember because they had a TV?
36:43
SPEAKER_01: They had a TV in the um opposite the bath, and I was like, Well, I must have a bath then.
36:47
SPEAKER_01: Um the bed was so big, like we like I literally could hardly see you in there.
36:55
SPEAKER_02: I was joyful, and then do you remember we're so nice, that would be perfect, right?
36:58
SPEAKER_02: We watched Woodstock 96 or whatever it was.
37:00
SPEAKER_02: Oh yes, yeah.
37:02
SPEAKER_02: So good.
37:03
SPEAKER_02: Um, yeah, I was thinking was I was talking to um another girl as well, and we were just saying, like, we need to bring sleepovers back, like adult sleepovers need to come back.
37:11
SPEAKER_02: Like I know we kind of have them still, but like we need more.
37:15
SPEAKER_02: But like, I I don't think like drunken sleepovers, they should be like planned sleepovers.
37:19
SPEAKER_01: I mean, like I did that, like I say that Lizzie, like the night before we went to the airport because it was uh Hendu, and it was so nice because the thing is is like you need your own room.
37:30
SPEAKER_01: Like, I don't mind sharing a bed with people, but like ideally, like everyone would have their own room, and that would be like perfect, you know.
37:38
SPEAKER_01: Did you have your own room?
37:39
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I had my own room there, yeah, yeah.
37:41
SPEAKER_01: Which was it, and also like obviously her house is so nice, and it would like it felt like I was in like a hotel, it was gorgeous.
37:48
SPEAKER_01: Um but that's what you need.
37:51
SPEAKER_01: You need like ever like to have girl sleepovers, but everyone has like their own double bed and it's like really nice.
37:57
SPEAKER_02: Well, I was thinking, like, if I get married, if I if I ever get married when I'm you know 62 or something, I I would love, like, I don't really care about like I don't really want any big thing or like expense.
38:10
SPEAKER_02: In fact, I don't even care about having a handu.
38:12
SPEAKER_02: But if I was gonna have one and I had the money, I just want to rent a suite in a hotel with all my friends and for us to like get wasted on champagne, order room service, like go out somewhere for a few hours and then come back and just have a slumber party.
38:28
SPEAKER_01: That would literally be heaven.
38:30
SPEAKER_02: How fun would that be?
38:31
SPEAKER_01: That would be so good.
38:32
SPEAKER_01: Then just do like prank calls.
38:33
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, prank calls, just prank calls.
38:36
SPEAKER_01: We could do like like we could think of like our best prank calls and then like recreate them all.
38:41
SPEAKER_02: Oh my god, so good.
38:42
SPEAKER_02: What would you say is like because okay, guys, so we are I would say pretty prolific prank callers back in the day.
38:48
SPEAKER_01: I mean, like I'm not good on the phone, but I was an active participant in being in the group.
38:54
SPEAKER_01: Um, but I would always like crack up, I like couldn't do it.
38:57
SPEAKER_01: But Jules was really good.
38:59
SPEAKER_01: Actually, Jules, you you weren't actually.
39:01
SPEAKER_02: I wasn't good at within five seconds of me opening my mouth, they'd be like, Juliana, not again.
39:06
SPEAKER_02: Whereas Gia was good.
39:09
SPEAKER_02: Gia was really good and Maya was really good.
39:11
SPEAKER_02: Our best one was when we told this guy that his house was on fire and he was out and he had to come rushing home to check if his roof was on fire.
39:23
SPEAKER_01: Oh no, that's really bad.
39:25
SPEAKER_01: Such a point.
39:26
SPEAKER_01: We told that at the at Tink's wedding and it got a big laugh, didn't it?
39:30
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
39:31
SPEAKER_01: It is.
39:31
SPEAKER_01: Um the other really good one was which I actually wasn't there for, but um was when you told that guy in First of Union there was like a model competition.
39:40
SPEAKER_02: No, no, it was that it was a bondage, it was a bondage part.
39:44
SPEAKER_02: Oh no.
39:44
SPEAKER_02: Oh yes, you're right, you're right, you're right, you're right, you're right.
39:46
SPEAKER_02: That w uh there was another one that we told that there was a bondage event.
39:50
SPEAKER_02: I think it was a bondage modelling competition.
39:53
SPEAKER_01: Oh, I can't remember.
39:54
SPEAKER_01: There was also another one where Oh no, I think you're right, you're right, you're right.
39:57
SPEAKER_02: There were two separate ones.
39:58
SPEAKER_02: There was one when we told him that there was a modelling competition and all that we he'd been selected, and everyone had to come meet in the like university bar on campus, and he turned up, and it was just us and him, and we were like, lol.
40:15
SPEAKER_02: And then there was another time.
40:18
SPEAKER_02: Sorry, and then we called, do you remember?
40:19
SPEAKER_02: Do you remember that guy?
40:20
SPEAKER_02: Um, there was a guy who we all thought looked like Wolverine.
40:23
SPEAKER_02: I think it's called he didn't look anything like Wolverine.
40:25
SPEAKER_02: I think it's just because he had like a very small sideburn or something, and so we we we called him up and we were like, we're hosting like a bondage fashion show.
40:35
SPEAKER_02: Would you like to come and be sort of like a Wolverine character?
40:39
SPEAKER_03: And he was like, What the hell are you talking about?
40:41
SPEAKER_03: And we were like, Yeah, like we've just been observing you from across campus, and you're giving like really sort of wolvish quality.
40:48
SPEAKER_02: And he was like, please, like leave me alone.
40:51
SPEAKER_02: Gosh.
40:52
SPEAKER_01: There was also one when we were in Bath and we convinced someone we knew that like they'd met like a um girl that gave her a fake name out, and it was the girl calling, and we were no.
41:07
SPEAKER_01: Okay, I'll tell you the names after because I don't want to like out anyone.
41:11
SPEAKER_01: Um, but anyway, yeah, we called and she basically pretended like she was someone that they had met like on a night out, um, and the guy was like so confused and like kept texting being like, Who are you?
41:23
SPEAKER_01: We haven't met, we haven't met.
41:25
SPEAKER_02: Oh, okay, yes.
41:26
SPEAKER_02: I do vaguely remember that.
41:27
SPEAKER_02: We also sorry, this is side note, but do you remember when we went through our um quite illustrious career of like sending little notes through people's poetry, through people's envelope?
41:38
SPEAKER_03: What are they called?
41:39
SPEAKER_03: Um post door door post you know the thing.
41:44
SPEAKER_02: You know the letterbox, letter letterbox.
41:46
SPEAKER_02: No, you know it through the door.
41:48
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
41:49
SPEAKER_01: But it's called a letterbox.
41:51
SPEAKER_02: Maybe.
41:52
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, maybe letterbox.
41:54
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah, you're right, letterbox.
41:55
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
41:57
SPEAKER_02: I was thinking of a post box.
41:58
SPEAKER_02: I was like, obviously not Hannah.
42:00
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, anyway.
42:02
SPEAKER_02: We'd we'd write like romantic poetry to like it was only ever boys.
42:05
SPEAKER_01: Anonymous, anonymous romantic poetry.
42:08
SPEAKER_01: Not as seriously like I won't in a funny way, though.
42:11
SPEAKER_01: No, like not actually digging like, yeah, yeah.
42:14
SPEAKER_02: And it would always be like really quite specific, like niche sort of references to like their lives and interests.
42:20
SPEAKER_02: And there was one, so our friend was dating this guy, and um we wrote him a love, uh a love letter, a love poem from her, but she didn't know.
42:31
SPEAKER_03: And she went over to his house one evening, stayed over, and on his doormat, there was this like gorgeous, freshly written letter, and he was like, What the hell?
42:41
SPEAKER_03: Like, who's who who's this from?
42:43
SPEAKER_03: Opened it up and it just said his name in some kind of like calligraphy and like no no stamp or anything.
42:51
SPEAKER_03: So he opened it up in front of her and it was from it was this address from her, and it was like, I see you every day in bed.
43:00
SPEAKER_02: Oh gosh, I just want to give you so you were so angry because he didn't believe it wasn't her.
43:18
SPEAKER_03: He was like, who else would have put a hate in here all day?
43:25
SPEAKER_03: I think it was on Valentine's Day.
43:32
SPEAKER_02: So humid.
43:33
SPEAKER_02: Oh my god, and do you remember there was this other guy?
43:36
SPEAKER_02: Do you remember there was this other guy?
43:38
SPEAKER_02: This was at university, there was um he was really posh, basically there were loads of like roll tofs around, and he used to like go like shooting or something.
43:45
SPEAKER_02: And do you remember we wrote him one being like, oh, you awful brute.
43:50
SPEAKER_02: Um go on then, just go off and shoot.
43:56
SPEAKER_02: What was it?
43:57
SPEAKER_02: Oh you partridge you partridge layer.
43:59
SPEAKER_01: Oh, that was that was it, you partridge layer, you're not away.
44:01
SPEAKER_01: No, you awful brute.
44:02
SPEAKER_01: You've taken my heart.
44:04
SPEAKER_02: You've kept it for loot.
44:06
SPEAKER_02: That's what it was.
44:07
SPEAKER_02: And it was like, oh, I can't remember what the core it was really good.
44:11
SPEAKER_01: It was funny anyway.
44:12
SPEAKER_01: So we were we're obviously really stupid, silly, and just do dumb things.
44:17
SPEAKER_01: Oh my god.
44:17
SPEAKER_02: Oh, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, last thing, last thing.
44:22
SPEAKER_02: Just to add to the Marseille thing of doing the silly things.
44:24
SPEAKER_02: Me and Hannah almost got arrested for doing parkour.
44:29
SPEAKER_02: The Marseille police stopped us and we're shouting at us from the car.
44:36
SPEAKER_01: Also fly parkour, we stepped onto a slightly raised bit of the street.
44:41
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
44:43
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
44:44
SPEAKER_01: That was really weird though.
44:45
SPEAKER_01: I don't know what he was doing because it was kind of weirdly.
44:47
SPEAKER_01: I thought he was sending us to get off from the grassy bit, which was like a raised bit off the street.
44:52
SPEAKER_01: And then we said we did, and then he like kept on slowing down, and then he was like asking you where you were from and stuff.
44:58
SPEAKER_02: I know, but I thought I was gonna be arrested and he was gonna deport me or something.
45:02
SPEAKER_01: No, I think he was just like, I kind of think he was trapsing.
45:05
SPEAKER_01: I think he was off duty.
45:07
SPEAKER_01: Do you think?
45:08
SPEAKER_01: I don't know.
45:09
SPEAKER_01: There was something weird about it.
45:10
SPEAKER_01: It felt it felt a bit dodge.
45:12
SPEAKER_01: It didn't feel like he was gonna arrest you.
45:13
SPEAKER_01: Obviously, he wasn't gonna arrest you for parkouring.
45:16
SPEAKER_02: I was going, I'm really sorry, I'm really sorry.
45:18
SPEAKER_02: It was a joke, it was joke parkouring, parkouring.
45:21
SPEAKER_02: I'll stop now, I'll stop now.
45:24
SPEAKER_02: Anyway, whatever.
45:26
SPEAKER_02: Well, I think that's more than enough for one day.
45:28
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
45:30
SPEAKER_02: Alright, love you guys.
45:31
SPEAKER_02: Ciao for now.
45:38
SPEAKER_00: Hello, you've reached No Country for Hot Girls Podcast.
45:43
SPEAKER_00: We can't come to the phone right now because we have better things we could do.