Latest / Hardiness with Dr Paul Taylor / You’re Not Meant to Feel Sorted All the Time With Carly Taylor

Transcript

You’re Not Meant to Feel Sorted All the Time With Carly Taylor · Hardiness with Dr Paul Taylor

• 0:09
  Speaker 1: Everyone. It's Carli here for this week's Mojo Monday. So
• 0:13
  Speaker 1: I was doing a bit of a cleanup of my
• 0:15
  Speaker 1: kitchen today and I got to that moment where like
• 0:19
  Speaker 1: everyone was out, which is always a great thing when
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: you're like doing a really big cleanup, because nobody comes
• 0:25
  Speaker 1: in and like ransacks the whole thing. So I got
• 0:27
  Speaker 1: to that moment where I stepped back and I thought, Yep,
• 0:31
  Speaker 1: this is it. It's clean, it's tidy, it's organized, and
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: everything was in its place. And then I had to
• 0:37
  Speaker 1: have a bit of a chuckle to myself because I
• 0:40
  Speaker 1: know the truth. Before the day's out, there will be
• 0:44
  Speaker 1: crumbs on the bench, which somehow always end up on
• 0:47
  Speaker 1: the floor, and plates will be left beside the sink
• 0:50
  Speaker 1: despite my best efforts at preemptive family briefing, and the
• 0:54
  Speaker 1: kitchen will slowly, inevitably return to being a kitchen in
• 0:58
  Speaker 1: a house where people live. And because I love a metaphor,
• 1:03
  Speaker 1: it struck me how much this is like life. I
• 1:07
  Speaker 1: heard Brene Brown say recently on another podcast that we
• 1:12
  Speaker 1: never arrive, and she's right. None of us ever reach
• 1:16
  Speaker 1: a point where things are permanently sorted, where our thoughts
• 1:20
  Speaker 1: are constantly calme, difficult emotions don't show up, and our
• 1:25
  Speaker 1: relationships are easy. Our bodies look and feel perfect, and
• 1:28
  Speaker 1: it all just stays that way. You won't, your children won't,
• 1:32
  Speaker 1: your family, your friends, your neighbors won't either. And the
• 1:36
  Speaker 1: problem isn't that we strive to improve ourselves because growth
• 1:40
  Speaker 1: is good. Looking after your mind and your body matters.
• 1:43
  Speaker 1: Of course, having goals and values and a direction gives
• 1:47
  Speaker 1: life shape. You know, growth is definitely a priority for me.
• 1:52
  Speaker 1: But the problem lies when we expect there to be
• 1:55
  Speaker 1: a final destination, a moment where our emotions just settle
• 2:01
  Speaker 1: and they stay settled. But life and being human just
• 2:06
  Speaker 1: doesn't work like that. There will always be challenges. Some
• 2:10
  Speaker 1: of those challenges will be big, some small, some expected,
• 2:14
  Speaker 1: some that completely blindside us. And with those challenges come emotions.
• 2:20
  Speaker 1: And sometimes these emotions are calm, and sometimes they're really
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: really difficult to feel, and sometimes all we want is
• 2:30
  Speaker 1: not to feel this way at all. And in our
• 2:33
  Speaker 1: Western culture, we spend a lot of time focusing on symptoms,
• 2:38
  Speaker 1: trying to control our emotions so that we can finally
• 2:42
  Speaker 1: live well, because they can so easily get in the way.
• 2:47
  Speaker 1: We all know that, But emotions are a bit like
• 2:50
  Speaker 1: my kitchen. Sometimes they're tidy and manageable, and other times
• 2:55
  Speaker 1: they feel completely overwhelming. But that doesn't mean that there
• 3:00
  Speaker 1: is anything wrong with me. So as you start to
• 3:05
  Speaker 1: think about your goals and your aspirations for twenty twenty six,
• 3:09
  Speaker 1: I want to invite you to reflect on something a
• 3:12
  Speaker 1: little different. Can you this year ride the waves of
• 3:17
  Speaker 1: your emotions while still striving for what matters to you,
• 3:22
  Speaker 1: still doing the important things that your emotions often tell
• 3:26
  Speaker 1: you not to do, the things that your emotions often
• 3:30
  Speaker 1: pull you back. Can you accept that you will never
• 3:34
  Speaker 1: be free of difficult emotions, just like a messy kitchen
• 3:38
  Speaker 1: and a busy family home, trusting they will come and
• 3:41
  Speaker 1: they will go. And as I say this as someone
• 3:45
  Speaker 1: who has always been emotionally sensitive and always will be,
• 3:51
  Speaker 1: the difference now is that I'm better, not perfect, but
• 3:56
  Speaker 1: better at not letting my emotions stop me from living
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: mine life. Sometimes that is really really hard to do,
• 4:04
  Speaker 1: but hard is good because hard is how we grow.
• 4:09
  Speaker 1: The work isn't about creating a life that never gets messy.
• 4:14
  Speaker 1: You know your kitchen is always going to get messy,
• 4:16
  Speaker 1: and so will you. It's about learning how to return
• 4:20
  Speaker 1: to what matters again and again and again, and doing
• 4:24
  Speaker 1: things even when it's hard. You know, life doesn't wait
• 4:29
  Speaker 1: for perfect emotions, Life doesn't wait for the perfect circumstances
• 4:33
  Speaker 1: for the perfect you. Life just keeps moving so you
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: keep moving forward. To so thank you for listening, and
• 4:43
  Speaker 1: to all those lovely people who send me encouraging messages
• 4:46
  Speaker 1: that my little Mojo Monday episode makes a difference. Thank
• 4:50
  Speaker 1: you so much. It means a lot to me. I
• 4:53
  Speaker 1: will catch you next week. Sea