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How to Feel More Pleasure Through Movement · Libido Lounge

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Welcome to the libido lounge where we focus on all things love, lust, and libido.
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We believe that fabulous sex is important to health as exercise and good food.
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Hey, everybody.
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Welcome back to another episode on the lounge.
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I'm so excited about the conversation we're gonna have today.
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I'm bringing on today one of my friends, Jennifer Joy Jimenez, and we're gonna talk
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about body shame.
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We're gonna talk about dance.
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We're gonna talk about techniques you can use to feel more confident in your body, to get
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into the body sensations, to actually feel pleasure in new and profound ways, which, of
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course, translates down into better libido, better relationships, better connection with
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yourself, with your partner, and so much more.
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So I wanna introduce Jennifer here.
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So Jennifer is the founder of Transcendence, which is just a powerful movement exercise that
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we're gonna talk about today that is really designed to do this, to help you get into your
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body more, to help you feel more confident, and so many more things than I know that I'm gonna
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let Jennifer tell us about.
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And then she's also the founder and director of the health and well-being division at the Brave
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Thinking Institute.
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So welcome.
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I'm so excited to be here with you today.
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Thanks for joining us, Jennifer.
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It is my absolute pleasure, and I'm super grateful to have to be here today.
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Yeah.
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Well, let's open with this concept of, like, what is Transcendence?
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How were you inspired to really create this?
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And what are we really doing from a standpoint with this type of visionary movement that is
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bringing us into our body, that is helping us become more full in our body and more alive?
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Can you kinda just set the stage with, like, what are we talking about exactly with
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Transcendence?
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Yes.
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Thank you for asking.
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So the one of the easiest ways I have found to describe Transcendence is it's like taking the
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mindfulness of yoga off the mat and infusing in joyful free form movement.
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So what do we mean by free form?
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Most people when they think of the word dance, they think of Zumba, ballroom, jazz, ballet, a
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very technical dance.
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Now that is my background.
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I came from the professional dance background world.
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But conscious dance or freeform dance is really about unlocking your inner dancer within.
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We're all born dancers.
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Have you ever seen a baby that when music comes on, they can't help but shake their little
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tush?
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Like, literally rhythm and movement and being in our bodies and being free in our bodies.
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If you look at three year olds, four year olds, five year olds, as long as they've lived a
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pretty normal, you know, upbringing without a huge amount of trauma, they're in their bodies.
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They're moving their bodies freely, and then somewhere along the way, we lose touch with
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really living in that free, connected, embodied state.
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And so one of my passions controlling our bodies.
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Right?
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That statistically it said that ninety percent of women hate their bodies, that one in three
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women have been abused
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in some way.
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So it is
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no surprise that we leave, in some way.
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So it is no surprise that we leave our bodies.
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It hasn't felt safe.
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It hasn't felt pleasurable or good to be in the body.
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And conscious dance and specifically transcendence is a set of dance opportunities,
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right, really where we come into the breath and we allow the inner dancer within us.
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I like to say that we all have an inner physician within.
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We all have an inner wise being, and yet we don't give ourselves a whole lot of time to
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unlock that part of us that is available to heal us, to free us, to feel that sense of
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liberated freedom.
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That's probably one of the first things I have clients say in their very first class.
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I haven't danced like this since I was a child.
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I don't think I've ever felt this liberated or free.
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It didn't matter that I was told I have two left feet.
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You know, you don't have to have rhythm.
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You're not following anyone else's dance steps or moves, so there's no complication in it.
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It really is just about feeling amazing and freeing our bodies.
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One of the things you get me thinking about as you're describing this is, like, in sexuality
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and in sexual relations, I see so many times where partners kinda get locked into, like,
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this one movement, right, where it's like, oh, well, it looks this way.
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We do step a.
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We do step b.
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We do step c.
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Like, we reach the grand finale, and it's over.
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And so, you know, when you're talking about an infant and that movement of that's almost like
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free form.
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Right?
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Infants aren't thinking.
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They're just they're just moving.
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So I'm curious.
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Like, do you feel like with something like Transcendence, like, if that is really kinda,
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like, almost unlocking more of the possibilities that is kinda break can break us
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out of, say, moving, not only in life, but also in our intimate relationships in a a different
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way that kinda gets us unlocked from those patterns.
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Absolutely.
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Yeah.
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Absolutely.
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I have a couple of a couple quick stories to share of of people who've I mean, I've worked
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with, of course, thousands of people from all over the world that tell me they not only feel
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more confident in their body in their everyday interactions, from the boardroom being able to
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stand up and really be in their full confident self, but, of course, to the bedroom where they
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get unlocked and freed from those rote, you know, very stagnant, very stiff, very tight
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kind of movement patterns that when you live in the fullness of your being, it unlocks freedom,
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sensuality, connection in ways that you wouldn't even begin to describe.
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I would say I'm having I've been married twenty nine years.
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I've had one sexual partner, which is really uncommon.
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I met my husband when I was 16, though, so that tells you a few things.
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But it doesn't matter.
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I've seen myself grow over all of these years from a 16 year old, very curious, and very, you
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know, sensual woman, but also as a professional dancer.
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I got into very controlling ways and abusive ways with my body as a young woman, starvation
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and control and deprivation and over exercising, that whole paradigm, which is
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really normal in the professional dance world, to then getting pregnant with my daughter and
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having a fifty hour labor even though I trained for it like I was gonna climb Kilimanjaro, and
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I'm in the best shape of my life.
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And I'm visualizing my beautiful, perfect, all natural labor in my mind every night and doing
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kegels and the whole thing as you, you know, you can understand where that's going.
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Right?
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So that birth was actually my doorway, though, to this work because after all that work and
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all that dedication to feel like I was so disconnected during that birth process.
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I wasn't taught to let my body lead me.
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Think about that for a moment.
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In birth, in love making, in sensuality, it's not about telling the body what to do.
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Right?
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It's really about actually letting the natural wisdom that is the body teach you, show you,
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guide you.
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And so after that fifty hour labor and birth, I became a real sponge and a hungry student to
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find everything I could in my around me, every book I could find, every mentor, and that's
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really where I found conscious dance.
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And the first whole process was me healing my own disconnect from my body, coming home to my
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body, even healing the trauma the birth was for me.
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I healed through conscious dance, and that was the early years of creating Transcendence,
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really pulling from some of the most famous and well known world renowned, you know, mentors of
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this modality.
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But I'm also I was raised by a thought leader mother who taught me from a very early age that
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thoughts become things, that we're cocreators of our lives, that this is a we're all swimming
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in this universal spiritual energy.
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We're spiritual beings having a human experience, but she was also very much a a
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thought leader.
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You know, that gen she's 75.
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Right?
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So that generation, the Wayne Dyer and Deepak Chopra, you know, generation where it's very
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kind of thought driven, and I'm wired differently.
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I'm wired from an embodied perspective.
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I wanna feel it and move it to know it.
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I'm a kinesthetic learner.
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So I was able to take all that I was learning and understanding in all of those teachings as
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now an adult woman, right, and how it didn't quite work just by thinking it into reality
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with my birth, right, manifesting that perfect birth.
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I was like, okay.
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Something was off there.
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And I began to marry this mind, body, spirit connection, bringing in conscious dance, but
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universal spiritual principles and breathing and movement patterns that just completely open
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me up to this whole other experience of my own body first and foremost.
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I started having some of the best sex I've ever had in my life, and I wouldn't even call it
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sex.
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I would call it oneness and connection and dancing in the bedroom and just because I I was
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in my body, like, really in my body.
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Then when I had my second two babies, my son my two sons, I had my son Joel in two hours, start
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to finish, my son Joaquin in ninety minutes.
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And there were moments I know it sounds crazy, but moments during those births where it was
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pleasurable.
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I mean, it was too.
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Right?
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But it there was this this harmony and this connection where I was dancing with the baby
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and allowing my cervix to open, and that led to understanding all different connection points
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with my body.
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And that was really taking that, my own self first, right, as my own laboratory, and then
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beginning to roll it out little by little with clients.
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Now that's it's been my daughter's 24.
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She'll be 25 in November.
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So, you know, we're talking over twenty years in this laboratory of life to codify this in a
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way that people that aren't natural dancers or movers or people that are, like, in the best
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shape of their lives, people that are older, people that are younger can come into an
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experience in over the course of a few minutes, really, honestly, with some basic awarenesses
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that this is safe.
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This is a nonjudgment zone.
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You're not gonna be ridiculed or judged here because that's really the first thing people
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get defensive.
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Oh, I've been told I can't dance, or, oh, I need to do it in it.
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There's a right way.
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There's a wrong way.
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I'm gonna get judged.
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That's our human kind of adult paradigm, and I think that shows up in the bedroom too.
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I'm gonna do it wrong.
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You know?
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Like, oh, am I doing it right?
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Just all of that self consciousness.
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And what I found is when you have these types of modalities that teach you there is no wrong
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way.
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And, actually, when you live in your body, you can sense the other person and what's going on
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with them energetically without words in ways that you've heightened and opened up this sixth
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sense.
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And so two quick stories for about clients.
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I mean, I have, like, so many stories, like, hundreds and hundreds of stories, but two that
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came to my mind.
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One is a woman, and she hadn't had sex for over a decade.
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She came into my transformational coaching and retreats and classes and all kinds of things
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that I do.
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And transcendence is really this, like, key piece that I bring into that work to help women
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come into their bodies.
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So the big thing she wanted because she ate really well.
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She was basically pretty healthy, but she wanted to reignite things in the bedroom.
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And what we found very quickly was she was running a lot of unconscious masculine energy.
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And when you're running as and this is really common.
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I'm sure you see it all the time in your work.
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Right?
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And it's really this default mode a lot of women have learned to operate in this very, you
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know, western world that we're in, and it's really not their fault.
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They just haven't learned to soften and how to run Go energy and then how to soften into
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receiving energy.
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There's this opportunity for that.
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So taught her a few tools within the first less than three months of the program.
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I wanna say it was probably within the first sixty days.
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She's in and her thing was she wanted to be whisked way into the bedroom.
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Like, she didn't wanna initiate.
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He hadn't initiated in, like, a decade, and I'm thinking, oh my god.
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Yeah.
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I can't I can't even imagine.
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You know?
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Like, I just yeah.
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I just my my heart just felt so much for her and wanting her to have this experience, but
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allow it, like, to help her blossom and soften into this feminine energy that is magnetic.
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It's like the flower that attracts the bee.
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The flower can't be running around telling chasing after the bees.
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The flower just blossoms, and the bees come.
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Right?
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So, anyhow, she I remember one of the coaching calls where she came.
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She was like, Jennifer.
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You're never gonna believe it.
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He comes home from work.
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He grabs me in his arms.
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He whisks me off into the bedroom, and, you know, they had this really amazing intimate
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experience.
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Now she also needed some support because it'd been a long time.
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You know?
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So she needed some tools and some support around really making it as pleasurable as as it
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can be after at her age and after so many years, which we solved that as well just to be
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real.
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You know what I mean?
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But the but the point of her attracting him in that way came from an embodied experience.
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You know?
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And then Benjamin, my my other client who basically talks about like, he was just, like,
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really introverted, so clumsy that he would bump into things.
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You know, those people that just are like they they don't even know where they are in space.
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And think about how that might translate into the bedroom.
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Like, you're not it's just really hard to get into a rhythm.
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You know?
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And so two left feet bumping into things, like, super self conscious and told his whole life he
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can't dance.
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But yet, I think inside of all of us, there's this, like, five year old that just doesn't
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give a crap.
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You know what I mean?
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Like, that just we're at the the the summer concert, and we're just having fun and running
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around and twirling around and hopping and skipping and that part of us that just wants to
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be allowed to just be as we are.
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So he comes into the work, starts doing these, you know, transcendence practices and has
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completely blossomed.
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Totally super, you know, confident, can be on stage in front of a hundred people at an event
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just moving and dancing, and it's translated into his work in the world.
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He's increased his income.
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Like, so much can open up for people when they really come home to their bodies.
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So a few stories.
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Yeah.
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Thanks.
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I one of the things that I really wanna emphasize and and what you've said here is that
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concept, right, of guiding and of, like, let the body guide you.
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Because I do think that it's so common, right, that people get into this almost as, like, duty
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sex type of thing where it's like, oh, I'm just going to do this thing, and it's it's almost
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mechanical.
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Right?
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And oftentimes, I, like, I taught a class last week on having the right kind of sex.
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So people are like, well, what is that kind?
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Well, it's the kind that actually is exactly what you're saying.
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It's the kind that is body led, that is allowing your body to actually feel into this
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is what I like.
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These are the way my body responds.
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This is how my body is led.
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And and another thing I like about your work and and what I've experienced experience with
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it when we've been at conferences together and you've led, you know, activities this way is
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this this concept that I've seen with all the dance I've done over the years of this sense of
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allowing various body parts to almost lead where it's like, oh, what is it like?
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And we can take that into the bedroom.
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Right?
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Like so, like, what is it like?
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Because some of your work sometimes, I I believe you do things like, okay.
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Well, now lead from this part of your body.
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And so even in the bedroom, like, what is it like if I lead from my heart?
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What is it like if I lead from my yoni?
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What is it like if I lead from my bosom?
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Right?
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So you can say more about almost, like, tuning in to those different body parts like that.
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Mhmm.
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Yeah.
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Yeah.
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Yeah.
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Yeah.
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Yeah.
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I love that.
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Well, what came to my mind was actually my own process of getting to know my pleasure centers,
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which aren't only just my, you know what I mean, my sacred center or my yoni or my
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breasts, but, like, the inside of my elbow.
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You know what I mean?
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Or the inner part of my wrist to be kissed there.
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And actually, commune first of all, knowing that at all is my responsibility, and I'm sure
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you teach this, Diane.
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You know, it's not it's not anybody else's job to know what it feels like to be in my body,
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what I like to feel, where I wanna be touched, and when I wanna be touched there is the other
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thing.
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So as I've so this conscious dance practice, one of the the stages there's 10 stages in
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transcendence.
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One of the stages to help people come home to their body is stage four, which is the dance of
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self, and you do that exact thing through a very kind of sensual, you know, type of a song
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usually we're we're working with.
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And we literally will just start to kind of meander through the space, walk through the
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room, and feel the whole space.
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There is no front to class.
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There's no mirrors in a conscious dance class, which is great because you're not worried about
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how you look.
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You know, usually over time, you get better at that.
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But you just start moving your head and moving your shoulders, and literally you move towards
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pleasure, which is so counterintuitive for so many people.
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So much of our, at least, Western fitness world is this no pain, no gain.
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It you've gotta work really hard to see the results, and your body has to look a certain
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way to be pleasurable and beautiful and good enough, thin enough, curvy enough, whatever the
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enoughness is.
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So you just let all of that judgment out, and you just love moving your body, and your body
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loves to move.
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And as you open up to that movement, it does feel good.
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And you start to feel pleasure in your body, and you go, oh, this is what unlocks the sense
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of aliveness and pleasure.
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And I would say that's probably the most important shift for me in moving from a dutiful
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feeling of, like I mean, because my husband's from Mexico.
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He's a Latin literally, like, a Latin lover.
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Sexes and sensuality and connection and intimacy is one of the most important love
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languages for him, and he has no problem going straight in, you know, like, right to the
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central parts.
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You know?
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Doctor I love doctor Christian Northrop's books, women's bodies, women's wisdom, and
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secret pleasures of menopause.
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These are really great books because they just really open us up to there's so much more to
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look forward to even in our postmenopausal years as women, and I'm right in that
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transition as a 49 year old woman.
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You know?
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And one of the things that I learned even through reading her book is our energies are
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moving outward.
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Right?
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And men's energies are moving inward, so they just wanna go straight in.
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So I can't tell you how many times I've had to remind him and and be patient with it.
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Let it be okay that he wants to go straight for those parts.
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You know?
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And I'm like, hold on.
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Hold on.
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Kiss me here.
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Kiss me right.
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You remember, honey?
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It's like I'm like, we've been married twenty nine years.
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You should know this, but this is okay.
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I I don't mind.
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You just right here.
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It's right there.
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You know?
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Or right here and, like, help support.
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It's not anybody else's responsibility.
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It's my responsibility to live a turned on life so that I am living in this pleasurable living
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place.
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From that place, I can come and bring pleasure and sensuality.
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One of my favorite quotes is that the turned on western woman really will save the world.
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Right?
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But that's a really important piece, isn't it?
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You know, Diane, the turned on woman and that we're responsible to live this turned on life.
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It really is.
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And I think so many times because of, you know, patriarchy versus matriarchy and just societal
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influences over the past many centuries, really.
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It has been this thing around like, oh, this pleasure, this feeling, this asking for what we
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want is either, like, bad, and they should just know.
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And I think finally, we're at this phase where, like, getting away from just, like even, like,
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just things like like you said, like, getting away from the thinking body into the feeling
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body and really making it safe and culturally acceptable and not only culturally acceptable,
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but culturally encouraged to say, hey.
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Actually, yeah, we do have to to voice our pleasure.
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We do have to really let our partner know.
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And after twenty nine years, still remind them because it's not that anybody's doing things
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wrong.
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It's that literally our brains work differently, and that's all it is.
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There's no other meaning behind that.
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And so we do have to take that personal pleasure, that personal responsibility.
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And part of that is learning our body and learning our feeling and learning all of those
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things, which is, you know, one of the reasons why I wanted to bring you on because, like I
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said, my own personal experience has been that the sensual dance types of movements and
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courses and classes have been the one of the most fundamental things for me for getting in
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my own body and being having that confidence.
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Right?
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We talked about that offline around, like, the confidence that these classes and these courses
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give us around these movement classes to have the confidence to say those hard things.
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So I know we're, we're about to wrap up here, and I do wanna make sure that everybody knows
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that we do have an amazing gift that you're giving away, which is a free class.
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So you're you're offering the audience a way to try this and experience this and get in their
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body and waking up their sensuality, but waking up their confidence and all the other amazing
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things that you mentioned in your stories that come with this.
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So thank you so much for that.
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And is there and we'll have all the information on how to get ahold of Jennifer and work with
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her in the show notes, you guys.
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But I wanna ask a final question, which is, like, is there anything else you wanna leave
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our audience with?
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Is there anything that you just feel is so important that they're remembering in the
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context of movement, of dance, of getting inside of their body, of you know, really
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having that confidence to take charge of their own pleasure.
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Anything to live leave us with today?
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Say probably the biggest message is it doesn't have to take a long time.
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That was probably one of my biggest learning coming from the professional dance world.
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I used to dance eight hours a day, and I had this paradigm that I had to do it all in a
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certain way in a huge amount of my day.
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And as I became a mother and a entrepreneur and all the things that I do, truly, and I know
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this is probably you know, we hear this over and over and over again as sitting as the new
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the new smoking because our lymph system literally can't move the toxins out of our body
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unless our muscles are moving.
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Right?
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So literally standing up from our desk, putting on a song that just ignites joy.
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And we all have that song where we're driving in the car, and it comes on, and you just can't
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help it.
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You're singing in the car.
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Your toes start tapping.
24:09
So it's that kind of a song that just ignites those happy hormones, and there's so much
24:15
science.
24:15
We haven't even gotten into the health benefits of dance.
24:19
And we talked all about the sensuality, but, I mean, it increases your circulation.
24:23
It increases your mental acuity.
24:26
It literally gives you an emotional boost.
24:29
It's our best antidepressant out there.
24:32
It also helps our muscles and our bones.
24:34
I mean, I could go on and on and on.
24:36
So just a few minutes of dance.
24:38
Everybody really is your best friend and, a daily dance of of daily dose of dance can
24:45
really keep the doctor away as well.
24:48
So, my encouragement is just dance.
24:50
Just
24:51
dance.
24:51
I love it, and I love that orientation too.
24:54
It doesn't have to take a lot of time because I think so often when it's like a new habit, it's
24:58
like, okay.
24:59
I'm gonna commit to an hour a day, and that lasts for about three days, and then we realize
25:03
we don't have time.
25:04
So it doesn't take a lot of time.
25:06
And and I have found in my own life, like, I dance all my emotions, and that's one of the
25:11
things I've got at essential dance practice where it's like, if I'm angry, if I'm sad, if I
25:15
have fear, if I have anxiety, if I'm happy, all the different emotions, you know, the light
25:19
ones, the dark ones, the hard ones, the easy ones, bring it to dance.
25:23
And it's amazing.
25:24
Like, I have my special songs where it's like, oh, I'm feeling angry, and I gotta get it out.
25:29
And the songs I go to.
25:30
And all those things are just it's just you're right.
25:33
There's so many health benefits.
25:35
And I wanna remind all of our listeners that this year in 2024, we're doing these short, you
25:41
know, short twenty minute episodes.
25:43
But for those that have for the people that have the largest downloads, the best shares,
25:50
the, you know, the highest level of all those things, we're inviting them back for a deep
25:55
dive.
25:56
So please, please, please download this show.
25:59
Share it with your friends.
26:00
Let's get Jennifer back so we can do a much deeper dive on all of the health benefits
26:05
because all these health things are actually related to libido and those things.
26:09
So make sure you download this.
26:10
Make sure you share it.
26:11
And remember, this is sexy season.
26:14
And in sexy season, we have a lot of raffles going on.
26:17
So if you review us, send us a screenshot of your review.
26:21
We're gonna get you listed in or enrolled into our raffle.
26:24
We have almost 20 different giveaways, our courses, courses by Susan Bratton, tons of
26:30
information, tons of free content for you guys for supporting us.
26:33
So thank you all for listening.
26:35
Thank you for being here on the lounge, Jennifer.
26:37
It's a pleasure.
26:38
Thank you for coming.
26:40
Thank you for having me.
26:41
So great to be here.
26:43
Alright, everybody.
26:44
Well, that's a wrap.
26:45
We'll see you next time.
26:46
This is doctor Diane, your libido doc, reminding you to always feel sexy, be classy,
26:52
and stay a little badassy.
26:55
See you next time.