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Transcript

I Went To The ER For Mental Health—Here’s What Happened · Voices for Voices®

• 0:01
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Hi everyone, it's Justin here, Voices for Voices.
• 0:04
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Thank you so much for joining us on this episode of our Voices for Voices podcast, a TV show, whether you're watching and listening here in the United States, across the world.
• 0:16
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Um, we're just grateful to have you with us.
• 0:19
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Welcome to the Voices for Voices family.
• 0:22
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And if you have been with us before, welcome back to the family and to the new listener, the new viewer.
• 0:33
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Welcome to the Voices for Voices Family.
• 0:37
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Um I was in the middle of we were in the middle of doing an episode and uh we you know we have some wild and crazy weather going on.
• 0:46
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So uh the uh the weather radio was doing its thing, and uh so that happened sometimes.
• 0:55
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So I'm guessing there's a reason why uh that happened.
• 1:00
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Um that was about maybe like nine minutes in, and and so just thought we'll just restart and reboot, and it's okay to do that.
• 1:14
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Uh I I think the old me would be so I would have gotten like upset, I guess, uh if that were to happen, you know, many years ago.
• 1:33
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I would go, oh my gosh, I gotta redo this.
• 1:37
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so I think it's brought a little bit of perspective, which is what I'm finding a lot with my life now, is just perspective on certain things and not letting them rattle me as much as often as they could or did or do, and maybe will and into the future.
• 2:15
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And I think that's important with anything, especially with mental health.
• 2:22
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: For me, I do way too much ruminating on what if this happens, what if that happens, I'm feeling this way, what's this mean?
• 2:34
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Should I do this?
• 2:35
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Should I not do this?
• 2:36
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And you might say, well, that's just a human being being a human being, and that's true.
• 2:44
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Uh, but it is taxing on the mind when it's constantly in motion, thinking, you know, the what ifs.
• 2:56
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And should I do this?
• 2:58
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Should I not?
• 2:59
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Should I just say, you know what?
• 3:03
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: The show got interrupted by the the the weather radio.
• 3:08
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So I'm we're just not gonna do a show today, and that'd be fine too.
• 3:13
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And I think that that's the big takeaway at this point for me, is just to continue.
• 3:23
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Yeah, we talked on earlier shows about you know, go after going after your dreams.
• 3:28
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: People are gonna say no to you and me.
• 3:32
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: They're going to they're gonna say some things that are that could be hurtful, whether they're intended to be or not.
• 3:47
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Uh there can be people just say like nothing's ever gonna pan out.
• 3:55
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: This is stupid, this is dumb, and use words, and I try and I don't use those words as much as I used to.
• 4:05
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I used to I used to swear and curse like so much, and I think that as I'm processing and and speaking through uh the show on this episode is along with the alcohol situation for me, which talk about on many of our shows.
• 4:31
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So uh chances are you tune into a show, you're gonna you're gonna run into an episode that that shares that past.
• 4:41
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Um along with that was like the cussing, the swearing, cursing.
• 4:53
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I think about it now, and that was like a big part of me where if I get mad, then I would just you know curse, cuss that that like a sailor.
• 5:07
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I mean, and nothing against sailors, it's just that that's just kind of the analogy that uh when when I was growing up that I would I would hear and people would say that and so now I don't, and and so when somebody says something's dumb and stupid and and re relates that to what I may be working on, I may be thinking about or why are you doing that?
• 5:41
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: You know, that that's never gonna work.
• 5:43
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Why would why would this person be interested in the work that you're doing?
• 5:53
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Um and that's where the dreaming, that's where the people will say they're gonna say no, they're gonna say do something else more traditional, and that's okay, because everybody's kind of you know entitled to their own opinion, and and that's okay.
• 6:16
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It might not feel good as we're on the receiving end of those words, comments, but we have to just kind of look at like life in general of how much time am I gonna give to certain comments, like how much headspace is of mine is gonna be made up of comments of others talking down to me, or you, or both of us, or anybody, uh, and how much of it's gonna be positive.
• 7:03
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And I'll tell you at the beginning of the Voices for Voices journey, there was a great majority that was just like, this is never gonna work out, nothing's gonna come from it, and then things started to shift, but just I'm talking like tiny shifts.
• 7:29
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So we're talking about a hundred percent of well I'm just gonna do it, I'm gonna try it and see how it goes.
• 7:42
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It was about you know, around 100% of like, well, it's probably not gonna go anywhere.
• 7:47
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I want it to go somewhere, I want to help people, I want to reach the people, but I don't know if I if I can do that.
• 7:55
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I is that what God wants me to do?
• 8:00
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Does he want me to be in that position?
• 8:04
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Does he want me in our show and our podcast to reach and help three billion people over the course of my lifetime and beyond?
• 8:18
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And if so, how?
• 8:24
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And over the years, it's been a crawl at best for those initial years because I didn't I didn't put a lot of time into it.
• 8:42
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I put enough time into it to do the a brand new day event each year.
• 8:51
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But outside of that, before the podcast and TV show came about, that's all it was.
• 8:57
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It was a once voices for voices, it was voices for voices, a brand new day event.
• 9:05
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And that's what it was.
• 9:08
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Then the show started, and then we're in the studio, and then we're kicked out of the studio because of I don't know, talking about real life topics, I guess, is a problem.
• 9:28
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So I could have said no then.
• 9:32
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I could have taken that as God's way of saying, Justin, no, this it's not gonna work.
• 9:42
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Instead, it's actually been a blessing because we've been able to come to you so much more frequently, so much yeah, so much more frequently.
• 9:56
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And I mean, I'm getting chills just you know thinking about this right now.
• 10:03
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I was about ready to give up.
• 10:12
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: That was another thing.
• 10:15
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I was just ready to give up when the when the studio thing kind of left.
• 10:21
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I was like, alright, that's it.
• 10:27
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And then there's this thing called Zoom, and there's other audio visual video conferencing software packages out there.
• 10:37
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And then I got to thinking, I'm like, you know what?
• 10:41
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Why don't I try this?
• 10:43
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: See, see if it works.
• 10:45
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: If it does, great.
• 10:48
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: If it doesn't, I guess great, because then I would know.
• 10:55
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And the only thing that has happened, not the only, but one of the only things that have happened since being kicked out of the TV studio is our numbers have skyrocketed of interest.
• 11:14
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Countries, people on all continents are tuning in to our show because it comes out, I guess, a little bit randomly.
• 11:32
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Some days we have it, some days we don't.
• 11:34
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Some days it's earlier in the day, some days it's later in the day, depending on your time zone, right?
• 11:41
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so having those options and just talking about life, talking about what's going on in my head is a great form of therapy.
• 11:58
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: This is this is part of my therapy.
• 12:01
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I've said it before.
• 12:02
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Some people write and journal on paper or on their phone, on their notepad.
• 12:10
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: This is the way I journal.
• 12:12
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I journal for the most part, besides my therapy appointments and psychiatrist appointments.
• 12:21
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I journal on our show.
• 12:28
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so I just talk about what's going on in life and how it's impacting me and how it might impact you.
• 12:36
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And I want to just reassure as much as possible life is worth living.
• 12:44
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I just I just read yesterday of two people taking their own lives.
• 12:55
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And yeah, they make it to the news because they're higher profile.
• 13:00
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Um, one was well, they're they're both.
• 13:09
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: One was an athlete, one was an actress.
• 13:12
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Um and I start thinking, wow, that's what would happen if I gave up on Voices for Voices.
• 13:26
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Not that it that would happen.
• 13:28
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Let me backtrack.
• 13:48
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And and so I don't I w I wasn't them, so I don't know what what demons they were dealing with.
• 14:01
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And I'm not a person I I used to be a big judger, like judging people.
• 14:08
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I I still do, I guess a little bit, but way less than what I I used to.
• 14:16
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so I don't I don't know what was going on through on in their heads while they're making these decisions that take their own lives.
• 14:25
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Just so so sad.
• 14:30
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And one of them was talking about how they were basically crying out for help.
• 14:38
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Like, nobody's helped me.
• 14:40
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I've reached out, I've said I needed help, and I equate that a little bit to my story before I did get help or get help offered.
• 15:01
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: There were so many doctor appointments, so many tests, all kind blood drawn, everything.
• 15:11
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I knew something just wasn't right.
• 15:16
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I didn't want to believe it was mental health because there's that whole stigma.
• 15:21
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Stigma of mental health, the stigma of being a male, white, Caucasian, just supposed to get through things.
• 15:29
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I'm not supposed to cry, not supposed to have emotion like that.
• 15:34
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But I did, and I knew.
• 15:42
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And after so many visits, I and during those visits, I'm like, something's just not right.
• 15:49
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I don't I don't know what it is.
• 15:51
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I something's not right.
• 15:56
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I'm losing all this weight, I'm not eating as much, I'm feeling I'm blacking out sometimes, and I'm not doing any drugs or alcohol or anything like that.
• 16:11
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so it wasn't until my third emergency room visit in two weeks when they brought the psych staff in, where I was given the option of voluntarily admitting myself in the psychiatric ward of the hospital.
• 16:39
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So I got to make the decision because all the tests that they did came back and said, You're fine, you're not dying.
• 16:46
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But to me, I felt like I was.
• 16:48
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I feel like I was dying every minute of all those days, and so I can see a little bit of you know, with when people take their own life that with all due respect to the doctors and everything that I saw prior, the emergency room, physicians, nurses, techs, every all of those.
• 17:26
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It's nothing against them personally, but I was crying out, I felt like I was crying out for help.
• 17:37
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And it wasn't until after all these different tests, just I just didn't feel like I was being taken seriously, and then when it came time, I was like, all right, I'm maybe this is the all the branch that I need.
• 18:00
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so I voluntarily admitted myself.
• 18:06
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It was the lowest point, but then it was also one of the best points in my life because I was able to start working on myself with professionals that were helping me.
• 18:26
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And I got the help.
• 18:49
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Things need to change.
• 18:51
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: That 988 isn't gonna do everything.
• 18:57
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: There's people that need help that don't know that they need help.
• 19:06
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And you know, some people will come over and try to talk the person into go going and getting help.
• 19:17
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Well, the person doesn't think they need help.
• 19:22
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: That's a that's a hard thing, hard thing to deal with.
• 19:28
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I'm talking about the people that are saying something's not right, I need help.
• 19:33
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I don't know what that looks like, but I need help.
• 19:39
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I feel not in a good spot.
• 19:48
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I need help.
• 19:51
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And every person that takes their life, my heart breaks for for them, their souls, their family, friends, co-workers, anybody that worked or knew that individual or those individuals.
• 20:19
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: When people are crying out for help and then they can't get it, whether it's this was another thing that I had dealt with.
• 20:29
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Well, I'm not dying right now, but we can get you in in three months to see a psychiatrist.
• 20:36
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Three months?
• 20:38
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: We're talking about life and death over here, folks.
• 20:42
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And it's you're gonna tell me and tell others, oh, well, you know, it's not serious enough.
• 20:51
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So, you know, you're you're saying you need help, you want to see somebody, but like that's not that's not a that's not an emergency, even though inside of us it's an emergency, the bells, the whistles, the alarms, everything's going off.
• 21:13
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And sometimes it's so hard to like verbalize it.
• 21:18
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It's hard to retell over and over and over and over our story, our experiences, but it's also exhausting when we do and try to share and it not be taken seriously.
• 21:35
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so anybody in the medical medical field, mental health, psychiatry, psychiatrist, I know there are behavioral health, I know there's so many great people that are helping and want to help and able to help.
• 21:51
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Heck, there's there are people I've wanted to get on the show, but because they gotta worry about their boss.
• 22:00
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Or the organization's brand, you know, they can't come on and and just have a conversation about what they do, what got them interested.
• 22:12
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I mean, that right there is a tragedy in itself.
• 22:19
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: You're supposed to be empowering people.
• 22:22
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: If a guest comes on and they start sharing things, go, oh my gosh, somebody in Switzerland could be watching and listening, go, oh, I I need help.
• 22:35
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And that guest or that host shared an idea, and maybe I'll try to do that.
• 22:47
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: That's what we're here for.
• 22:52
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: That's what we're this is what Voices for Voices is built on that foundation of helping people, especially those affected by mental health, mental illnesses, trauma, recovery, and so many more that we've uncovered, and we we want people to share their voice.
• 23:21
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And if they don't feel like they're being heard, come on the show.
• 23:25
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: We got a tiny megaphone, but maybe that's enough.
• 23:31
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Maybe that's enough to get something to change so you're able to get that help.
• 23:40
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And I think when people hear the word help, they think that oh, I'm not helpless.
• 23:45
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I can do this.
• 23:46
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I can it's not saying you're helpless or that I'm helpless.
• 23:51
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It just means I need a little help at this time.
• 23:54
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Doesn't mean I need help every single minute of every single day for the rest of my life.
• 24:01
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It may.
• 24:03
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Like for me, people go, oh Justin, how uh how long are you gonna go to therapy?
• 24:09
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: How long are you?
• 24:10
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I'm like, I don't know.
• 24:11
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I'm I'm gonna continue to go, and I I need to go.
• 24:17
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So do is that something that I enjoy?
• 24:23
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Not really.
• 24:25
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I mean, I I like the fact that I have a mental health team.
• 24:32
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But do I like enjoy it?
• 24:34
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: No.
• 24:36
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: You're not gonna enjoy it.
• 24:40
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It's not gonna be like the best thing since sliced bread or whatever.
• 24:46
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But that's where that last episode we talked about when people say no, tell us to do this or not to do that, or you'll never you'll never make it, and you'll never do the thing that you said you're doing, or you're that you're working on.
• 25:04
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: When you hear that enough, that hurts.
• 25:22
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Not at all.
• 25:24
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It's just that if we feel passionate about something, man.
• 25:33
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Somebody says, your shows are dumb, they're stupid.
• 25:38
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I mean, that doesn't feel very good.
• 25:43
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Because I feel like they're not dumb, that they're not stupid.
• 25:48
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: A hundred and ten countries, two thousand cities across the world.
• 25:58
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Okay, take half of that.
• 26:00
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Be like, oh, I don't believe that.
• 26:02
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Okay.
• 26:03
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Fifty countries.
• 26:05
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: There's people that are watching and listening that I'm never gonna meet.
• 26:10
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I hope I do, but I'm probably not.
• 26:14
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I'd love to be able to meet every single person and more.
• 26:20
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And just shake their hand, give them a hug, tell them that they matter.
• 26:29
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: The life's worth living, even if it doesn't seem like it, and for the people that are constantly talking down on others, you gotta stop that.
• 26:43
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Like, oh, there they go again.
• 26:46
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: They're trying that thing.
• 26:48
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Oh, they're talking about this topic.
• 26:52
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Well, that's what this is for.
• 26:56
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And here comes the what the the weather uh the weather radio.
• 27:03
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So I I apologize for that weather radio, but it is important that if there is uh you know bad weather coming coming through to uh let it let us know.
• 27:18
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It's kind of like Lucy.
• 27:19
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Lucy, well, first off, my eyes itch or no itch.
• 27:24
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: They just with my uh allergies and that.
• 27:29
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So that's why I'm I'm not crying at this point.
• 27:32
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But it's like Lucy, she'll jump in and be part of the show.
• 27:36
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So this show we got about we got 20 plus minutes in before we have uh you know thunderstorm warning or thunderstorm watch in our area.
• 27:49
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So that's that's the one good thing that uh that the the weather radio has in and that it helps provide for us uh a warning for us to to be prepared for uh the different kind of weather that can be coming, you know, uh uh wind and rain and hail and sleet and snow and all those.
• 28:18
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So we're we're we're not quite to the snow yet.
• 28:23
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Um yeah, so that's what you're hearing in the background.
• 28:27
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So it's it's uh weather radio.
• 28:31
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Uh but yeah, the people that say, no, don't do this.
• 28:36
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I don't I've I've used the word jealous before.
• 28:40
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I I I've grown not to like that word.
• 28:46
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Uh because I think it's it's a little bit of judging of like, well, I'm better than you or you're better than me, and so like like who are any of us to tell any of us the thing you're doing is not good?
• 29:06
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I mean, yeah, we can have comments and and that's that's part of the First Amendment.
• 29:16
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But if you love what you're doing, if and it's it's not even oh I love getting in front of the camera.
• 29:24
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It that it's not even that.
• 29:26
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: That would have that would have gone by the wayside hundreds of episodes ago of like, oh, I'm in front of the camera and I'm so important.
• 29:42
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I'm I'm not.
• 29:43
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I'm just a voice, I'm just a vessel.
• 29:46
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so there's episodes where I'll be on, there's episodes we have guests on.
• 29:51
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Uh we're having some pretty uh important guests coming up pretty soon that you'll be uh seeing and and hearing on an upcoming episode.
• 30:04
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But you know, getting back to the the mental health, if people are crying out for help and they're asking for help, like people don't do that just for the heck of doing it.
• 30:20
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Like, people don't just go, oh, I'm gonna start a podcast about my mental health, and oh well, he's crazy, she's crazy, or you know, that's still that's still out there.
• 30:40
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: People still believe that people go, well, you just get through it, and that's just part of life, and okay, that's fine.
• 30:48
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It is part of life, so it's also part of life if I need help, that I'm able to get the help that I need.
• 30:56
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So you do you, and I'll do me.
• 31:00
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: How about that?
• 31:02
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: That's what yeah, the some of these individuals that like to come and tell people like me and others that oh it's just part of life, man.
• 31:18
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: You just you just gotta get through it.
• 31:21
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Like, yeah, these people they're claiming they're mental, just that they're that's a cop out, and that's an excuse.
• 31:29
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And really, we all have mental health.
• 31:35
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And then to say, oh, well, you're just making that like who enjoys that?
• 31:41
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Who enjoy I don't, but it's a fact, so I don't like the fact that I'm where I'm at mentally with medication and therapy, like you know, I save a lot of money and not take medications, but I need help.
• 32:14
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I need to bounce ideas and thoughts and how I'm feeling to mental health professionals.
• 32:26
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Cause I'm not a professional.
• 32:28
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I'm a professional expert on myself.
• 32:33
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But that's about it.
• 32:35
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I give my I'll give my opinion and where things come from, and every single one of our shows, every single one of the books that we have come out, every single one of the TV shows or movies or comic books, whatever, they're all underpinned with mental health, PTSD, and and the list goes on.
• 33:00
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So that's who we are.
• 33:02
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so if you need help, keep keep crying out for help.
• 33:10
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Call who you need to call.
• 33:12
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: These agencies that say they want to help, are they really helping, or are they just checking the box?
• 33:20
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Because unfortunately, with human trafficking, and I I wasn't really planning on getting into this, but there's so many, there's so many organizations doing great work.
• 33:36
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But then there's people that are like, oh, you need to call this number if you're going through or have gone through a particular situation or experience, and then you call them or I call them, and they're like, Well, we will give you some resources, like, okay, here, go read about it.
• 33:58
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Or it's like, I don't need to read about it.
• 34:02
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: You said that you were gonna help, so if you're not helping me, whether that's legal representation, whether that's a counselor, whatever shape, color, whatever that may look like, and it's just checking the box, we don't need organizations like that, and that's an unpopular opinion.
• 34:27
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I get that.
• 34:29
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I get there's gonna be people that are gonna hate on that, the fact I said that.
• 34:35
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But if you're not actually gonna step up to the plate, people go, well, you know, that costs money to do that, and well, then don't do it then.
• 34:46
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: If you don't have the money, you don't have the donations, you don't have the backing, whatever it is, then don't do it.
• 34:54
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Don't half ass something, and there I go.
• 35:01
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Curse, I apologize for that.
• 35:04
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But don't halfway do something so you can have your superior go, oh wow, you talked to 20 people today, and okay, but what about what about the 20 people?
• 35:19
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Well, 10 people, you know, they just needed to have a conversation, but maybe the other 10, maybe they had they were having an emergency, having an emergency, and they needed to be seen, and it was just like, well, just call 911.
• 35:36
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Well, yeah, you can call 911, they'll take you to the emergency room.
• 35:41
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But if you're telling like an ER doctor who has somebody who's just gone through a stroke or a heart attack or something, and they come and see you or I, and they're like, Well, they're alive, and their you know, blood tests are coming back okay, and all these other tests are coming back okay, they're just gonna tell you you can leave.
• 36:06
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So if you're in an organization that all you're doing is checking boxes, you gotta just think about are you making, are you helping?
• 36:21
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Are you helping?
• 36:23
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Is your company organization helping?
• 36:30
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Or are you just checking that box?
• 36:35
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And there's so many box checkers out there for organizations and individuals.
• 36:41
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Like, I'm not checking any boxes, what you see is what you get.
• 36:49
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: You get my experience, my story, and you get our guests when we have guests on their stories.
• 37:02
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so, if again, if if you're not your organization isn't stepping up to the plate, like, yes, I'll sponsor you to get mental health care, and I'll actually get an appointment right now, and so we'll have a three-way call, and we will get you seen as soon as humanly possible.
• 37:29
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Today, tonight, tomorrow morning, whatever that may be, but we're gonna see it through.
• 37:36
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: We're not gonna just step back and say, Well, yeah, that it's too bad that you went through that, and you wish there was more we could do, but we just you know, we just have this you know fancy brochure with you know these resources, and you know, one of them is like go to your your local library and do some research.
• 38:01
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Somebody that's going through a mental health break or whatever you want to call it, they don't have the wherewithal to go to the library to do the research.
• 38:17
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: They need help like yesterday.
• 38:22
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so, yeah, that's a great it library is a great place, and I utilize our local library, it's awesome.
• 38:28
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I'm very grateful for it.
• 38:32
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But if that's like one of the top three or so things to do when somebody's going through a mental health break, that's not helping.
• 38:48
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: That person, whether it's you, somebody else, whether it's me, whoever it is, let's destigmatize the word help too.
• 39:05
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Because when people again, when people hear the word help, they think, oh, I'm helpless, or they're helpless, or they're just making an excuse because they don't want to do something, and this and that.
• 39:19
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So just like mental illness, just like the word help needs destigmatized.
• 39:32
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Because when people hear the word help, I guarantee it.
• 39:40
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Does do people go if somebody sprains an ankle in a sporting event or tears an ACL or injures themselves, gets injured?
• 39:52
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: What do they do?
• 39:54
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: They have an ambulance, it takes them straight to the hospital.
• 39:58
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And they get care right away.
• 40:07
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: As far as who pays for it, that's what these organizations need to do.
• 40:12
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Pay for, have that money, check those boxes if you want to check them, but put some money towards if somebody goes through a mental health break at a high school American football game tomorrow night or whenever.
• 40:34
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Why shouldn't that individual get the same care as a player that gets injured?
• 40:42
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Well, we only have one ambulance here.
• 40:45
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: No, this is what I'm talking about.
• 40:48
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: These are excuses if we can have an ambulance there for all these games, and I talked about this on a previous episode.
• 41:02
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: If we can have an ambulance staff there for the players and coaches, what about the parents and and uh the the students that are what there to watch the game or hang out with their friends, whatever it may be it may be.
• 41:37
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Oh, okay.
• 41:40
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I did that three times.
• 41:43
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Two of them, I was like, let it go so fast.
• 41:49
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: You're fine, you're not dying.
• 41:52
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Drink some Gatorade.
• 41:54
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: That's what I was told.
• 41:56
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: No joke.
• 41:59
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: No joke at all.
• 42:01
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It wasn't until that third time when an ambulance came, when I felt like I was blacking out in my dad's truck, and he called 911, pulled over to the side of the road, an ambulance took me to the ER, and it wasn't until that third time that time when I was in the ambulance and they took me to the hospital.
• 42:26
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And I was crying out for help.
• 42:28
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I knew something wasn't uh, I knew something was up, I didn't know what it was, and then I had all these the stigmas just kind of floating through my head, and so do what makes you happy, do what makes you smile, do what makes you have a little bit of fun.
• 42:53
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Like it's the whole mental health, like that it's not all like fun, okay?
• 43:00
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I get it, but it's kind of neat that me sitting here that I'm able and we're able with our small megaphone to reach people on all continents of the world.
• 43:26
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So keep asking for help, keep asking for help.
• 43:30
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Organizations, you want to make a big difference?
• 43:33
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: How about paying for mental health care for a year for a person that was crying out for help and then was finally taken seriously?
• 43:51
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: That's what we need.
• 43:52
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: We need more people like that, more organizations like that.
• 43:57
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: If we get to the point, that's what we're gonna.
• 44:00
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: To do is we're going to actually help.
• 44:07
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Because one of the other reasons why in my head at that time, earlier when I was having my mental health crash, I was concerned about the money.
• 44:19
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Ambulance ride is three thousand dollars.
• 44:24
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: This test, that test, this doctor, this all these things have costs, and they add up and they add up and they add up.
• 44:35
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So that's where an organization can help.
• 44:42
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Just say, hey, the next time a person we raised X amount of dollars, and we want to do a percentage, and you just reach out to the hospital, and that's how you do it.
• 44:55
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: If you want to be known, then you can probably do the hip weight, probably won't be able to, but you may be able to say that you help somebody, and so one of the worries is with their mental health care that they don't have to worry about as much is the money part.
• 45:27
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Because I've been there.
• 45:28
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Somebody can say, Oh, you're full of it.
• 45:30
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I was there.
• 45:36
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And as a demographic that should just be able to handle things I've been told.
• 45:46
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I still needed help.
• 45:48
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I still need luckily I got it in time.
• 45:56
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so again, it is a darn shame people taking their lives when they're crying out.
• 46:05
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And it doesn't look the same for everybody.
• 46:09
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Might just be hidden signs like somebody backs away from something they're working on, and then they back away from something else.
• 46:21
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Not everybody's gonna totally be on board with it because of the stigmas.
• 46:32
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But we gotta just let people know that there's real organizations that really want to help, that'll stay on the phone or stay in the chat on a computer, and have somebody come pick you up or me up or whoever the person is so they don't have to worry about driving.
• 46:57
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Because driving was one of the things that I was terrified of.
• 47:06
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So that's how organizations can help.
• 47:12
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And that's just my story.
• 47:14
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: There's so much more to it, but it's not about me, it's about the people.
• 47:21
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I'm at a decent place, mental health-wise.
• 47:26
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: There's just a lot of people that aren't, whether they know it or not.
• 47:34
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But if you feel like you need to talk to somebody, that's what it is.
• 47:37
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: You talk to a counselor.
• 47:46
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And if that doesn't work out, talk to a different one.
• 47:49
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: You get to pick.
• 47:53
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: That's another thing that's a misnomer.
• 47:55
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: You're not stuck with a particular counselor if it's not working out.
• 48:00
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Like, eh, they just don't get me, or they're prying, or whatever it is.
• 48:12
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So find that find that match.
• 48:17
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Somebody'll listen.
• 48:19
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: They'll chime in if there's something that's concerning or ask a qu but not so much that we're uncomfortable.
• 48:31
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: If we're uncomfortable, we we we we move on, we get a new counselor.
• 48:38
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: If we need to be seen by psychiatrist, talk to your general practitioner, family doctor, probably need a referral, but that should also go by the wayside, too.
• 48:53
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Shouldn't need a referral.
• 48:55
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Somebody's having a an uh mental health, mental illness emergency.
• 49:01
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: They can't, again, they can't like I I recounted me.
• 49:05
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I could I couldn't wait three months to be seen.
• 49:08
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I just couldn't.
• 49:10
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And then I'd have to drive 45 minutes, which I was terrified to drive.
• 49:15
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So that just wasn't gonna work.
• 49:17
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so you just do the things that work for you.
• 49:25
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: If you need help, you need help.
• 49:28
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I think we all need help to some extent, and help is just talking.
• 49:39
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Just talking.
• 49:45
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But there's just too many people that are taking their own lives way too early, way too just it's just so heartbreaking.
• 50:03
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Yeah, I think our pharmaceutical companies and hospitals, I think all that can get revamped.
• 50:13
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: They want to call it reimagine.
• 50:14
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Well, reimagine it so you can help people.
• 50:19
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: What are the pain points?
• 50:21
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Stigma.
• 50:24
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I don't know if I'm gonna have enough money to cover this.
• 50:28
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: What are people gonna think about me?
• 50:32
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: They hear that I was in a psych ward and I or I'm taking medication, medication for see all that all those synergistically need to happen and mesh together.
• 50:55
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So this is a pretty intense episode.
• 50:57
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It started off uh started off lighthearted, and then we had the the uh weather radio go go off, so we got a little education there.
• 51:09
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Um that was like the third time too, like two times it went, one time it went off on an earlier episode that I was filming, but we were only a few minutes in, so uh so we just axed that that one, which was fine because this episode is so much better.
• 51:28
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I felt like we were able to talk and share some pain points, hopefully, some organizations, some hospitals, some health insurance providers, some people that are in need to be seen or need a little bit of help at this time.
• 51:54
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Again, getting help, needing help is a point in time.
• 51:59
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It's not the that does not define us.
• 52:04
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Some days we may need more help than others.
• 52:09
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I know that's the same for me.
• 52:12
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Some days I'm like, I can't wait another another couple days for my appointment.
• 52:22
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So I need to reach out and see if I can reschedule it for sooner.
• 52:31
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Luckily, with my team, my mental health team, they're flexible enough to do that.
• 52:40
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Because they've listened to me for years.
• 52:46
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So thanks for joining us.
• 52:48
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Thumbs up, like, follow, subscribe, share, reshare, repost.
• 52:53
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Uh take out that phone if you're not on your phone, and if you're on your phone, reach out to 2550, 200 contacts on your phone and share the voices for voices podcast, TV show, 570 plus episodes.
• 53:13
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So many choose from.
• 53:14
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And if you're uh you're new to the Voices for Voices family, welcome and welcome back to all who have been with us on previous episodes.
• 53:28
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Uh again, Instagram, Facebook, X, TikTok, follow us, see what's happening.
• 53:42
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: That's where our episodes get dropped.
• 53:47
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And thank you for being with us.
• 53:49
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: We're grateful.
• 53:49
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Can't do any of this without you.
• 53:55
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So let's celebrate all the voices in the world and let's be a voice not just for ourselves, but maybe somebody else in need that could use some help sharing their voice.
• 54:06
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So until next time, we will see you on the next episode of the show.
• 54:12
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Bye bye for now.