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What to Do When You Feel Yourself Shutting Down · The Arise with Anita Podcast

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome to the Rise with Anita podcast, the space where soulmate's strategy and dreams are no longer optional.
• 0:06
  SPEAKER_00: I'm your host, and you just have my transfer mindset code and found out we come back.
• 0:16
  SPEAKER_00: Feel the call to rise higher, but sometimes feels half by home stories to happen for substances.
• 0:22
  SPEAKER_00: We don't just talk about growth, we embody it.
• 0:25
  SPEAKER_00: We have to wait for one five of you to do claims our next bubble.
• 0:30
  SPEAKER_00: You'll hear mixed up school episodes for me and interviews with school-driven leaders, the best in their field, who live what they teach and rise by example.
• 0:39
  SPEAKER_00: Each conversation is a callus for your next breakthrough.
• 0:42
  SPEAKER_00: You're not broken, you're breaking through.
• 0:44
  SPEAKER_00: Let's go ahead and rise together.
• 0:53
  SPEAKER_01: If you're new here, I'm really glad you've found your way in.
• 0:56
  SPEAKER_01: And I just want to say you are absolutely in the right place.
• 1:02
  SPEAKER_01: And if you've been walking in the season with me, thank you for being here.
• 1:07
  SPEAKER_01: I love you guys so much more than you could even imagine.
• 1:11
  SPEAKER_01: Before we dive into today's episode, I'm going to invite you to take a breath with me.
• 1:18
  SPEAKER_01: Inhale gently through the nose and exhale slowly through your mouth.
• 1:25
  SPEAKER_01: If you're driving, walking, or sitting somewhere right now, allow your shoulders to draw and soften.
• 1:32
  SPEAKER_01: Let your jaw incline.
• 1:35
  SPEAKER_01: Let your body know.
• 1:37
  SPEAKER_01: You're not behind and you're not in trouble.
• 1:41
  SPEAKER_01: Today's episode is for those moments when you feel yourself starting to shut down.
• 1:47
  SPEAKER_01: That moment when your chest tightens and your thoughts disappear, or in some cases, race, or your voice suddenly feels far away.
• 1:58
  SPEAKER_01: If that's ever happened to you, I want you to hear this first.
• 2:02
  SPEAKER_01: There is nothing wrong with you.
• 2:07
  SPEAKER_01: And nothing has gone wrong.
• 2:11
  SPEAKER_01: You see, that moment when your body starts to take over isn't failure.
• 2:16
  SPEAKER_01: It is information, though.
• 2:18
  SPEAKER_01: Your nervous system is doing what it's learned to do to keep you safe.
• 2:24
  SPEAKER_01: And so often when this happens, we try to push.
• 2:28
  SPEAKER_01: Just get through it.
• 2:29
  SPEAKER_01: We tell ourselves, just say what we need to say.
• 2:32
  SPEAKER_01: Don't be dramatic.
• 2:35
  SPEAKER_01: Get it together.
• 2:38
  SPEAKER_01: But pushing doesn't create safety, it creates the actual collapse.
• 2:44
  SPEAKER_01: So today instead of fixing or forcing, I want to show you how to stay with yourself when shutdown shows up.
• 2:54
  SPEAKER_01: Because the goal isn't to keep speaking, the goal is to stay connected with yourself.
• 3:00
  SPEAKER_01: And transparently, I've been through this not too long ago.
• 3:06
  SPEAKER_01: So I'm going to let you guys know what helped me get out of the shutdown mode.
• 3:13
  SPEAKER_01: But before we get into actual tactics, I want to have you guys really feel into the reframe.
• 3:22
  SPEAKER_01: You don't lose your power when you pause.
• 3:26
  SPEAKER_01: You lose it when you abandon yourself.
• 3:29
  SPEAKER_01: Most of us are taught that strength looks like continuing, no matter what your body is saying, and that's what causes burnout.
• 3:39
  SPEAKER_01: But regulated strength looks like paying attention, having awareness of the moment, slowing down, and choosing connection over performance.
• 3:50
  SPEAKER_01: And that choice begins to rewire the pattern.
• 3:55
  SPEAKER_01: So for me, when it just happened recently, I had a moment where I had feelings of anxiety come up.
• 4:07
  SPEAKER_01: And I had to get back to the place where I slowed down.
• 4:13
  SPEAKER_01: Not only did I slow down, but I started to pay attention.
• 4:17
  SPEAKER_01: How am I breathing?
• 4:20
  SPEAKER_01: How is my heart rate right now?
• 4:24
  SPEAKER_01: I wasn't concerned about what the external world was having around me.
• 4:32
  SPEAKER_01: I was, however, concerned about can I get back into my body and get it to feel safe?
• 4:41
  SPEAKER_01: Because right off that safety, I was going to collapse.
• 4:49
  SPEAKER_01: What started off as a slight balance of anxiety could have turned into a full panic attack had I not become aware of the breathing.
• 5:03
  SPEAKER_01: So it didn't help instantaneously, but what it did do is slowly allow me to go ahead and regulate my breathing.
• 5:15
  SPEAKER_01: I started first by observing what that breath looked like in that moment.
• 5:20
  SPEAKER_01: And then after that, I started doing full four by fours.
• 5:26
  SPEAKER_01: Some call it box breathing.
• 5:28
  SPEAKER_01: And it wasn't anything rapid, but I just held my breath by four when I needed to.
• 5:36
  SPEAKER_01: Well, inhaled for four, held my breath for four, released for four.
• 5:41
  SPEAKER_01: For P.
• 5:43
  SPEAKER_01: And it helped me slowly start to regulate.
• 5:47
  SPEAKER_01: That I started doing the six by fours.
• 5:50
  SPEAKER_01: I remembered, okay, can I just focus on my breath in this movie?
• 5:58
  SPEAKER_01: Can I not make this something is wrong with me?
• 6:06
  SPEAKER_01: But let's walk through when it is happening for you.
• 6:12
  SPEAKER_01: You don't just need to be in a shutdown right now.
• 6:16
  SPEAKER_01: But you do need to let your body listen.
• 6:20
  SPEAKER_01: So firstly, pause without the apology.
• 6:25
  SPEAKER_01: You don't need to explain your pause.
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  SPEAKER_01: You don't need to justify it.
• 6:30
  SPEAKER_01: And this could sometimes look like justifying it to ourselves.
• 6:35
  SPEAKER_01: The breath can count as a pause.
• 6:39
  SPEAKER_01: Being silent in that moment can count as a pause if you need it.
• 6:44
  SPEAKER_01: And then step two, I want you to find a point to have contact.
• 6:50
  SPEAKER_01: So for me, I happen to be sitting on the floor because I do like to ground on the floor.
• 6:57
  SPEAKER_01: But if not, if you're in a chair, place your feet on the ground.
• 7:02
  SPEAKER_01: Take the moment to notice the chair under your s body.
• 7:07
  SPEAKER_01: Allow yourself to stop.
• 7:11
  SPEAKER_01: Gently press your tongue against the roof of your mouth.
• 7:15
  SPEAKER_01: Start observing these little sensations that are not that little in these crisis moments.
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  SPEAKER_01: Get one sensation.
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  SPEAKER_01: One anchor.
• 7:27
  SPEAKER_01: This begins to tell your nervous system I'm here.
• 7:31
  SPEAKER_01: And step three was just choosing a micro-truth over the full truth.
• 7:38
  SPEAKER_01: Interestingly enough, I found that in my case when you are having a shutdown, there's something you're not saying.
• 7:49
  SPEAKER_01: So I'm going to encourage you.
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  SPEAKER_01: Don't start off with the biggest thing that you have to say.
• 7:56
  SPEAKER_01: Don't start by saying everything you need to say.
• 8:00
  SPEAKER_01: And do not explain your entire experience.
• 8:04
  SPEAKER_01: But what a micro-truth in this situation can look like is hey, I need a moment to myself.
• 8:12
  SPEAKER_01: I'm noticing I'm feeling overwhelmed.
• 8:15
  SPEAKER_01: I'm not ready to respond yet.
• 8:18
  SPEAKER_01: I need to pause.
• 8:20
  SPEAKER_01: That all counts.
• 8:23
  SPEAKER_01: Micro truth builds capacity without flooding your system.
• 8:30
  SPEAKER_01: So here's the idea that she's just happening underneath all of this.
• 8:35
  SPEAKER_01: He becomes someone who trusts herself enough to pause when she needs to.
• 8:51
  SPEAKER_01: Someone who knows that staying connected is more powerful than being articulate.
• 8:56
  SPEAKER_01: And that's actual leadership.
• 8:59
  SPEAKER_01: That is your voice.
• 9:01
  SPEAKER_01: And that is nervous system safety in action.
• 9:04
  SPEAKER_01: These are all seemingly simplistic.
• 9:08
  SPEAKER_01: But practicing them is what makes the difference.
• 9:13
  SPEAKER_01: And if this feels new to you, that's okay.
• 9:17
  SPEAKER_01: If it feels uncomfortable, that's also okay.
• 9:21
  SPEAKER_01: I want you to know you're not going to jump into feeling like this is the fix right away.
• 9:31
  SPEAKER_01: But what I found in my personal situation was when I implemented this practice, and it was in a moment where I actually needed it to work.
• 9:47
  SPEAKER_01: At different points and different times, the work has felt like it takes a little longer or a little shorter, depending on what state you're in, or I'm in in this case.
• 10:03
  SPEAKER_01: And that's okay.
• 10:05
  SPEAKER_01: But what it helped me do is to pause.
• 10:10
  SPEAKER_01: Right?
• 10:12
  SPEAKER_01: And it helped me eventually feel like I had a lifeline.
• 10:18
  SPEAKER_01: This moment sucked before, but now I'm able to get back into my body and I'm not afraid.
• 10:25
  SPEAKER_01: I'm starting to feel safe again.
• 10:29
  SPEAKER_01: So if you can, I encourage you to practice this.
• 10:33
  SPEAKER_01: And also start doing it with people you trust.
• 10:37
  SPEAKER_01: You can say, hey, I'm working on staying present through discomfort while I speak.
• 10:42
  SPEAKER_01: May I practice with you.
• 10:44
  SPEAKER_01: In last week's episode, I talked about speaking your truth.
• 10:49
  SPEAKER_01: And anytime you're learning to start to speak your truth, I highly recommend.
• 10:56
  SPEAKER_01: Even if you are comfortable saying what you need to say, we all have moments where we're afraid to speak up.
• 11:02
  SPEAKER_01: It's a good thing to practice with someone else who feels safe to do so.
• 11:09
  SPEAKER_01: Co-regulation is powerful, but you don't need the other person.
• 11:13
  SPEAKER_01: You can do it simply with the mirror if you have to.
• 11:17
  SPEAKER_01: Or these days, use a film.
• 11:20
  SPEAKER_01: Talk in the camera.
• 11:21
  SPEAKER_01: It might look a little odd talking to yourself, but at least you can feel what it feels like to actually say what you need to say.
• 11:30
  SPEAKER_01: And if you're like me, maybe you check your facial expressions.
• 11:34
  SPEAKER_01: So before you go, I want you to go ahead and take one more breath with me.
• 11:42
  SPEAKER_01: Inhale and exhale.
• 11:47
  SPEAKER_01: If this episode supported you, I invite you to share it with a woman who needs permission to slow down instead of continue to push.
• 11:55
  SPEAKER_01: And if you feel called, leave a review.
• 11:58
  SPEAKER_01: It helps this work reach more women who are ready for it, not just algorithms, because these are the conversations that.
• 12:07
  SPEAKER_01: So thank you for being here.
• 12:10
  SPEAKER_01: And thank you for your the honoring of your body as we continue to bubble up.
• 12:17
  SPEAKER_01: I'll see you in the next episode.
• 12:19
  SPEAKER_01: Until then, take care of yourself.
• 12:23
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you for rising with me today.
• 12:25
  SPEAKER_00: If this episode moved you, share it.
• 12:27
  SPEAKER_00: Tag me at Arise with Anita, and make sure to subscribe so you never miss a future activation.
• 12:34
  SPEAKER_00: And if you feel called, leave a quick review.
• 12:36
  SPEAKER_00: It helps more women find the space and rise into their power.
• 12:40
  SPEAKER_00: Your next level is already waiting.
• 12:42
  SPEAKER_00: Now go claim it.
• 12:43
  SPEAKER_00: I'll see you in the next episode.