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When Your Standards Cost You Something | EP 279 · Confident and Empowered Women

• 0:05
  There
• 0:06
  will
• 0:06
  come
• 0:06
  a
• 0:06
  moment
• 0:07
  when
• 0:07
  your
• 0:08
  standards
• 0:08
  stop
• 0:09
  being
• 0:09
  cute,
• 0:09
  quotes
• 0:09
  on
• 0:10
  Instagram
• 0:11
  and
• 0:11
  start
• 0:11
  costing
• 0:12
  you
• 0:13
  something
• 0:13
  real.
• 0:14
  And
• 0:14
  in
• 0:14
  that
• 0:15
  moment,
• 0:15
  you
• 0:16
  won't
• 0:16
  be
• 0:16
  tested
• 0:17
  on
• 0:17
  what
• 0:17
  you
• 0:18
  believe.
• 0:18
  You'll
• 0:19
  be
• 0:19
  tested
• 0:20
  on
• 0:20
  what
• 0:20
  you
• 0:20
  do
• 0:21
  because
• 0:22
  standards
• 0:22
  are
• 0:22
  cheap.
• 0:23
  When
• 0:23
  they
• 0:23
  are
• 0:23
  aesthetic,
• 0:24
  they
• 0:25
  are
• 0:25
  expensive
• 0:26
  when
• 0:27
  they
• 0:27
  require
• 0:28
  action
• 0:29
  because
• 0:29
  standards
• 0:30
  are
• 0:30
  not
• 0:30
  built
• 0:31
  on
• 0:31
  potential,
• 0:32
  they
• 0:32
  are
• 0:33
  built
• 0:33
  on
• 0:33
  patterns.
• 0:35
  And
• 0:35
  today
• 0:36
  we're
• 0:36
  talking
• 0:37
  about
• 0:37
  what
• 0:37
  it
• 0:37
  costs
• 0:38
  and
• 0:38
  you
• 0:38
  picking
• 0:39
  up
• 0:39
  the
• 0:39
  bill.
• 0:41
  Before
• 0:42
  we
• 0:42
  go
• 0:42
  any
• 0:42
  further,
• 0:43
  make
• 0:43
  sure
• 0:43
  you're
• 0:44
  subscribed.
• 0:45
  These
• 0:45
  episodes,
• 0:46
  build
• 0:46
  on
• 0:47
  each
• 0:47
  other,
• 0:47
  and
• 0:47
  if
• 0:48
  you're
• 0:48
  ready
• 0:48
  to
• 0:48
  move
• 0:49
  differently
• 0:49
  this
• 0:49
  season,
• 0:50
  you'll
• 0:50
  want
• 0:51
  access
• 0:51
  to
• 0:51
  all
• 0:52
  of
• 0:52
  them.
• 0:52
  Okay,
• 0:53
  let's
• 0:53
  get
• 0:54
  into
• 0:54
  it.
• 0:57
  Welcome
• 0:58
  back
• 0:58
  to
• 0:58
  the
• 0:58
  series,
• 0:59
  unavailable
• 1:00
  for
• 1:00
  Self
• 1:00
  Abandonment,
• 1:02
  a
• 1:02
  series
• 1:02
  for
• 1:03
  women
• 1:03
  who
• 1:03
  are
• 1:04
  done
• 1:04
  negotiating
• 1:05
  with
• 1:05
  themselves.
• 1:06
  This
• 1:07
  is
• 1:07
  for
• 1:07
  the
• 1:07
  woman
• 1:08
  who's
• 1:08
  confident
• 1:09
  enough
• 1:09
  to
• 1:09
  disappoint
• 1:10
  because
• 1:11
  self-trust
• 1:11
  is
• 1:12
  now
• 1:12
  the
• 1:12
  new.
• 1:13
  Standard
• 1:14
  here.
• 1:14
  Confidence
• 1:15
  is
• 1:15
  more
• 1:16
  than
• 1:16
  a
• 1:16
  feeling.
• 1:17
  It's
• 1:17
  a
• 1:17
  belief
• 1:18
  formed
• 1:19
  through
• 1:19
  action,
• 1:19
  practice,
• 1:20
  and
• 1:20
  repetition.
• 1:21
  It's
• 1:22
  what
• 1:22
  you
• 1:22
  do
• 1:23
  when
• 1:23
  it
• 1:23
  would
• 1:23
  be
• 1:23
  easier
• 1:24
  to
• 1:24
  explain
• 1:25
  yourself,
• 1:25
  perform
• 1:26
  or
• 1:26
  betray
• 1:28
  what
• 1:28
  you
• 1:28
  already
• 1:29
  know
• 1:29
  to
• 1:29
  be
• 1:29
  true
• 1:30
  for
• 1:30
  you.
• 1:31
  So
• 1:31
  if
• 1:32
  you
• 1:32
  are
• 1:32
  ready
• 1:32
  to
• 1:32
  stop
• 1:33
  abandoning
• 1:33
  yourself,
• 1:34
  just
• 1:34
  to
• 1:35
  keep
• 1:35
  the
• 1:35
  peace
• 1:36
  you
• 1:36
  are
• 1:36
  in
• 1:37
  the
• 1:37
  right
• 1:37
  place.
• 1:41
  Hey,
• 1:41
  hey,
• 1:41
  hey
• 1:41
  friend.
• 1:42
  Welcome
• 1:43
  back
• 1:43
  and
• 1:43
  I
• 1:44
  hope
• 1:44
  you're
• 1:44
  loving
• 1:44
  this
• 1:45
  series
• 1:45
  as
• 1:45
  much
• 1:46
  as
• 1:46
  I
• 1:46
  am.
• 1:47
  Ooh,
• 1:47
  friend,
• 1:48
  I've
• 1:48
  been
• 1:48
  loving
• 1:49
  it.
• 1:49
  I,
• 1:49
  Because
• 1:49
  we
• 1:50
  cannot
• 1:51
  talk
• 1:51
  about
• 1:51
  being
• 1:51
  unavailable
• 1:52
  for
• 1:52
  self
• 1:53
  abandonment
• 1:54
  without
• 1:54
  talking
• 1:55
  about
• 1:55
  standards.
• 1:57
  And
• 1:57
  let
• 1:57
  me
• 1:57
  be
• 1:57
  clear,
• 1:58
  this
• 1:58
  is
• 1:59
  not
• 1:59
  gonna
• 1:59
  be
• 2:00
  another
• 2:00
  one
• 2:00
  of
• 2:00
  those
• 2:00
  conversations
• 2:02
  about
• 2:03
  why
• 2:03
  your
• 2:03
  standards
• 2:04
  are
• 2:04
  just
• 2:05
  way
• 2:05
  too
• 2:05
  high.
• 2:06
  No,
• 2:07
  you
• 2:07
  are
• 2:08
  a
• 2:08
  high
• 2:08
  achieving
• 2:09
  woman.
• 2:10
  You
• 2:10
  live
• 2:11
  by
• 2:11
  a
• 2:11
  high
• 2:12
  bar.
• 2:12
  You
• 2:13
  strive
• 2:14
  for
• 2:14
  excellence.
• 2:15
  So
• 2:16
  excellence
• 2:16
  being
• 2:17
  your
• 2:17
  standard.
• 2:18
  Naturally.
• 2:19
  Of
• 2:19
  course,
• 2:20
  obvi
• 2:22
  you're
• 2:22
  gonna
• 2:23
  expect
• 2:23
  the
• 2:23
  best,
• 2:24
  but
• 2:25
  where
• 2:25
  we
• 2:26
  fall
• 2:26
  short
• 2:27
  is
• 2:27
  allowing
• 2:28
  that
• 2:28
  bar
• 2:29
  to
• 2:29
  get
• 2:29
  lowered.
• 2:30
  By
• 2:30
  our
• 2:30
  kindness,
• 2:31
  by
• 2:32
  our
• 2:32
  empathy
• 2:33
  and
• 2:33
  our
• 2:33
  desire
• 2:34
  to
• 2:34
  see
• 2:35
  the
• 2:35
  good
• 2:35
  in
• 2:35
  people,
• 2:36
  we
• 2:36
  start
• 2:37
  valuing
• 2:38
  someone's
• 2:38
  potential
• 2:40
  over
• 2:40
  their
• 2:40
  patterns,
• 2:41
  and
• 2:42
  that
• 2:42
  is
• 2:42
  where
• 2:43
  self
• 2:43
  abandonment
• 2:44
  quietly
• 2:45
  begins,
• 2:46
  because
• 2:46
  potential
• 2:47
  is
• 2:47
  who
• 2:48
  they
• 2:48
  could
• 2:48
  be.
• 2:49
  Patterns
• 2:50
  are
• 2:50
  who
• 2:51
  they
• 2:51
  consistently
• 2:52
  choose
• 2:53
  to
• 2:53
  be.
• 2:54
  And
• 2:54
  standards
• 2:55
  are
• 2:55
  built
• 2:56
  on
• 2:56
  patterns.
• 2:58
  Standards
• 2:58
  require
• 2:59
  alignment
• 3:00
  with
• 3:00
  who
• 3:01
  they
• 3:01
  are
• 3:01
  consistently.
• 3:03
  And
• 3:03
  it
• 3:03
  shows
• 3:04
  you
• 3:04
  way
• 3:05
  more
• 3:05
  than
• 3:05
  potential
• 3:06
  ever
• 3:06
  will.
• 3:07
  We
• 3:08
  are
• 3:08
  stepping
• 3:08
  into
• 3:09
  the
• 3:09
  moment
• 3:09
  where
• 3:09
  self-respect
• 3:11
  becomes
• 3:11
  a
• 3:11
  behavior,
• 3:12
  not
• 3:13
  vibes,
• 3:14
  vision
• 3:14
  boards
• 3:14
  or
• 3:14
  affirmations,
• 3:16
  but
• 3:16
  action
• 3:17
  listen,
• 3:18
  standards
• 3:19
  are
• 3:19
  easy
• 3:19
  when
• 3:19
  we're
• 3:19
  talking
• 3:20
  about
• 3:20
  them
• 3:20
  in
• 3:20
  theory,
• 3:21
  but
• 3:21
  it
• 3:22
  gets
• 3:22
  real
• 3:23
  when
• 3:23
  they
• 3:23
  disrupt
• 3:24
  your
• 3:24
  comfort.
• 3:25
  There
• 3:25
  is
• 3:25
  always
• 3:26
  a
• 3:26
  moment
• 3:27
  that
• 3:27
  comes
• 3:28
  when
• 3:28
  you
• 3:28
  actually
• 3:29
  have
• 3:29
  to
• 3:29
  enforce
• 3:30
  your
• 3:31
  standards.
• 3:32
  It's
• 3:32
  where
• 3:32
  you
• 3:33
  either
• 3:33
  stand
• 3:34
  or
• 3:34
  shrink.
• 3:35
  I'm
• 3:35
  gonna
• 3:36
  be
• 3:36
  sharing
• 3:36
  a
• 3:36
  framework
• 3:37
  with
• 3:37
  you
• 3:37
  because
• 3:38
  where
• 3:38
  your
• 3:38
  standards
• 3:39
  cost
• 3:39
  you
• 3:39
  something
• 3:40
  you
• 3:41
  stand,
• 3:42
  which.
• 3:43
  The
• 3:43
  S
• 3:44
  is
• 3:44
  for
• 3:44
  see
• 3:45
  the
• 3:45
  standard
• 3:46
  T
• 3:46
  tell
• 3:47
  the
• 3:47
  truth.
• 3:48
  A
• 3:49
  is
• 3:49
  for
• 3:49
  accept
• 3:50
  the
• 3:50
  discomfort,
• 3:51
  N
• 3:52
  is
• 3:52
  for
• 3:52
  navigate
• 3:53
  the
• 3:53
  fallout
• 3:54
  and
• 3:54
  D
• 3:54
  is
• 3:55
  for
• 3:55
  decide
• 3:56
  in
• 3:56
  alignment,
• 3:57
  And
• 3:58
  I
• 3:58
  am
• 3:58
  going
• 3:58
  to
• 3:58
  show
• 3:58
  you
• 3:58
  how
• 3:59
  this
• 3:59
  looks
• 4:00
  in
• 4:00
  real
• 4:00
  life
• 4:01
  because
• 4:02
  there
• 4:02
  was
• 4:02
  a
• 4:02
  time
• 4:03
  in
• 4:03
  my
• 4:03
  life
• 4:04
  when
• 4:04
  I
• 4:04
  said
• 4:05
  I
• 4:05
  wanted
• 4:05
  consistency.
• 4:07
  I
• 4:07
  said
• 4:07
  I
• 4:07
  wanted
• 4:08
  emotional
• 4:08
  security
• 4:09
  and
• 4:10
  reciprocity,
• 4:11
  but
• 4:11
  what
• 4:12
  I
• 4:12
  actually
• 4:12
  tolerated
• 4:14
  was
• 4:14
  just
• 4:14
  potential.
• 4:15
  Have
• 4:16
  you
• 4:16
  ever
• 4:16
  been
• 4:16
  there?
• 4:17
  You
• 4:17
  know,
• 4:17
  the
• 4:17
  kind,
• 4:18
  he
• 4:18
  wasn't
• 4:19
  terrible,
• 4:19
  abusive
• 4:20
  or
• 4:20
  even
• 4:21
  intentionally
• 4:22
  harmful.
• 4:23
  He
• 4:23
  was
• 4:23
  just
• 4:24
  inconsistent.
• 4:25
  And
• 4:26
  every
• 4:26
  time
• 4:27
  I
• 4:27
  felt
• 4:27
  the
• 4:27
  misalignment,
• 4:28
  I
• 4:28
  would
• 4:29
  just
• 4:29
  rationalize
• 4:30
  it.
• 4:30
  I'd
• 4:31
  say
• 4:31
  things
• 4:31
  like,
• 4:32
  oh,
• 4:32
  he's
• 4:32
  busy,
• 4:33
  he's
• 4:33
  figuring
• 4:34
  things
• 4:34
  out,
• 4:35
  or
• 4:35
  It's
• 4:35
  not
• 4:36
  that
• 4:36
  bad.
• 4:37
  I
• 4:37
  was
• 4:37
  too
• 4:38
  busy
• 4:38
  trying
• 4:39
  to
• 4:39
  do
• 4:39
  what
• 4:39
  Smokey's
• 4:40
  Mama
• 4:40
  said
• 4:41
  in
• 4:41
  Friday,
• 4:42
  which
• 4:42
  was
• 4:42
  make
• 4:43
  it
• 4:43
  enough.
• 4:46
  But
• 4:47
  here's
• 4:47
  what
• 4:48
  I
• 4:48
  wasn't
• 4:48
  telling
• 4:49
  myself.
• 4:50
  If
• 4:50
  it's
• 4:50
  not
• 4:51
  enough
• 4:51
  for
• 4:51
  you,
• 4:52
  my
• 4:52
  love,
• 4:53
  it's
• 4:54
  not
• 4:54
  enough.
• 4:55
  The
• 4:56
  moment
• 4:56
  my
• 4:56
  standards
• 4:57
  cost
• 4:57
  me
• 4:58
  something
• 4:58
  was
• 4:58
  the
• 4:58
  moment
• 4:59
  I
• 4:59
  had
• 4:59
  to
• 5:00
  walk
• 5:00
  away
• 5:01
  from
• 5:01
  someone
• 5:02
  who
• 5:02
  wasn't
• 5:02
  awful,
• 5:03
  just
• 5:04
  not
• 5:04
  aligned,
• 5:05
  and
• 5:06
  that.
• 5:06
  Cost
• 5:07
  me
• 5:07
  comfort.
• 5:08
  It
• 5:08
  cost
• 5:09
  me
• 5:09
  familiarity
• 5:11
  and
• 5:11
  the
• 5:11
  illusion
• 5:12
  of
• 5:12
  almost,
• 5:13
  but
• 5:14
  what
• 5:14
  it
• 5:14
  gave
• 5:15
  me
• 5:15
  was
• 5:16
  self-trust.
• 5:17
  So
• 5:17
  let's
• 5:17
  break
• 5:18
  down
• 5:18
  what
• 5:18
  actually
• 5:19
  happens
• 5:19
  through
• 5:20
  stand.
• 5:21
  Because
• 5:22
  listen,
• 5:22
  potential
• 5:23
  is
• 5:23
  always
• 5:24
  gonna
• 5:24
  try
• 5:24
  to
• 5:24
  seduce
• 5:25
  you,
• 5:27
  and
• 5:27
  when
• 5:27
  it
• 5:27
  does,
• 5:28
  you
• 5:28
  have
• 5:28
  to
• 5:29
  see
• 5:30
  the
• 5:30
  standard.
• 5:31
  Seeing
• 5:32
  the
• 5:32
  standard
• 5:33
  means
• 5:33
  identifying
• 5:34
  what
• 5:34
  pattern
• 5:35
  is
• 5:36
  actually
• 5:36
  happening,
• 5:37
  not
• 5:38
  the
• 5:38
  hope
• 5:39
  chemistry
• 5:40
  or
• 5:40
  when
• 5:41
  he's
• 5:41
  at
• 5:41
  his
• 5:41
  best,
• 5:42
  but
• 5:43
  the
• 5:43
  actual
• 5:43
  pattern
• 5:45
  you
• 5:45
  are
• 5:45
  not
• 5:45
  asking
• 5:46
  does
• 5:46
  he
• 5:47
  have
• 5:47
  potential?
• 5:48
  You
• 5:48
  are
• 5:48
  asking.
• 5:49
  Is
• 5:50
  this
• 5:50
  behavior
• 5:52
  consistent
• 5:53
  Because
• 5:54
  anybody
• 5:54
  can
• 5:55
  perform
• 5:55
  and
• 5:56
  put
• 5:56
  on
• 5:56
  a
• 5:56
  show
• 5:57
  once
• 5:57
  or
• 5:58
  for
• 5:58
  a
• 5:58
  few
• 5:58
  weeks
• 5:59
  or
• 5:59
  months,
• 5:59
  but
• 6:00
  patterns
• 6:01
  require
• 6:02
  character,
• 6:03
  friend
• 6:03
  potential
• 6:04
  may
• 6:05
  impress
• 6:05
  you,
• 6:06
  but
• 6:06
  patterns
• 6:07
  protect.
• 6:09
  The
• 6:09
  T
• 6:09
  is
• 6:10
  for
• 6:10
  tell
• 6:10
  the
• 6:11
  truth.
• 6:11
  You
• 6:12
  gotta
• 6:12
  tell
• 6:12
  the
• 6:12
  truth
• 6:13
  about
• 6:13
  what
• 6:13
  the
• 6:14
  pattern
• 6:14
  actually
• 6:15
  is,
• 6:16
  not
• 6:16
  what
• 6:16
  you
• 6:16
  wish
• 6:17
  it
• 6:17
  would
• 6:17
  become,
• 6:18
  not
• 6:18
  what
• 6:19
  it
• 6:19
  could
• 6:19
  be.
• 6:20
  If
• 6:20
  only
• 6:21
  they
• 6:21
  just,
• 6:22
  you
• 6:22
  know,
• 6:22
  you
• 6:22
  know
• 6:23
  how
• 6:23
  to
• 6:23
  finish
• 6:23
  that
• 6:23
  sentence
• 6:23
  way
• 6:24
  too
• 6:24
  well.
• 6:26
  But
• 6:26
  what
• 6:27
  is
• 6:27
  happening
• 6:28
  consistently?
• 6:29
  You
• 6:29
  know
• 6:30
  that
• 6:30
  friend
• 6:30
  who
• 6:30
  says
• 6:31
  he's
• 6:31
  amazing
• 6:32
  when
• 6:32
  we're
• 6:32
  together.
• 6:33
  Okay,
• 6:34
  but
• 6:34
  how
• 6:34
  often
• 6:35
  are
• 6:35
  you
• 6:35
  together
• 6:36
  and
• 6:36
  how
• 6:37
  does
• 6:37
  he
• 6:37
  show
• 6:38
  up
• 6:38
  in
• 6:38
  between?
• 6:39
  That's
• 6:40
  the
• 6:40
  pattern.
• 6:41
  Potential
• 6:42
  is
• 6:43
  episodic.
• 6:44
  Patterns
• 6:45
  are
• 6:45
  daily.
• 6:46
  Self-respect
• 6:47
  starts
• 6:48
  when
• 6:48
  you
• 6:48
  stop
• 6:49
  grading
• 6:50
  on
• 6:50
  a
• 6:50
  curve.
• 6:51
  A
• 6:51
  is
• 6:52
  for
• 6:52
  accept
• 6:53
  the
• 6:53
  discomfort.
• 6:54
  Here's
• 6:55
  the
• 6:55
  emotional
• 6:56
  reality.
• 6:57
  It
• 6:57
  is
• 6:57
  uncomfortable
• 6:58
  to
• 6:58
  choose
• 6:58
  patterns
• 6:59
  over
• 7:00
  potential
• 7:01
  because
• 7:01
  potential
• 7:02
  feels
• 7:03
  romantic.
• 7:04
  It
• 7:04
  feels
• 7:04
  hopeful,
• 7:05
  optimistic,
• 7:06
  and
• 7:07
  generous.
• 7:08
  But
• 7:08
  here's
• 7:08
  the
• 7:08
  truth,
• 7:09
  most
• 7:09
  women
• 7:10
  don't
• 7:11
  wanna
• 7:11
  admit.
• 7:12
  Sometimes
• 7:12
  we
• 7:13
  hold
• 7:13
  on
• 7:13
  to
• 7:13
  potential
• 7:14
  because
• 7:15
  we
• 7:16
  don't
• 7:16
  wanna
• 7:16
  start
• 7:16
  over.
• 7:17
  We
• 7:18
  don't
• 7:18
  wanna
• 7:18
  be
• 7:18
  alone.
• 7:19
  We
• 7:19
  just
• 7:20
  wanna
• 7:20
  be
• 7:20
  married
• 7:20
  already
• 7:21
  with
• 7:21
  2.5
• 7:22
  kids
• 7:22
  and
• 7:23
  the
• 7:23
  dog.
• 7:25
  But
• 7:26
  just
• 7:26
  asking
• 7:26
  for
• 7:27
  a
• 7:27
  friend.
• 7:27
  Does
• 7:27
  anybody
• 7:28
  still
• 7:28
  want
• 7:28
  this?
• 7:31
  Well,
• 7:32
  feel
• 7:32
  free
• 7:32
  to
• 7:32
  insert
• 7:33
  your
• 7:33
  own
• 7:34
  personal
• 7:34
  rom-com
• 7:35
  right
• 7:35
  here.
• 7:38
  I
• 7:38
  really
• 7:38
  wanna
• 7:38
  hold
• 7:39
  the
• 7:39
  space
• 7:39
  for
• 7:39
  you
• 7:40
  right
• 7:40
  here
• 7:40
  because
• 7:41
  Lord
• 7:41
  have
• 7:42
  mercy.
• 7:42
  This
• 7:43
  was
• 7:43
  me
• 7:43
  friend.
• 7:44
  There
• 7:45
  was
• 7:45
  a
• 7:45
  time
• 7:45
  in
• 7:45
  my
• 7:46
  life
• 7:46
  when
• 7:46
  I
• 7:46
  wanted
• 7:47
  to
• 7:47
  be
• 7:47
  married
• 7:48
  more
• 7:48
  than
• 7:49
  I
• 7:49
  wanted
• 7:49
  a
• 7:50
  happy,
• 7:50
  healthy
• 7:51
  matrimony
• 7:52
  with
• 7:52
  a
• 7:52
  man
• 7:53
  God
• 7:53
  designed.
• 7:54
  For
• 7:55
  me,
• 7:56
  I
• 7:56
  wanted
• 7:57
  what
• 7:57
  I
• 7:57
  wanted
• 7:57
  so
• 7:58
  bad.
• 7:58
  I
• 7:59
  wanted
• 7:59
  it
• 7:59
  more
• 8:00
  than
• 8:00
  what
• 8:01
  was
• 8:01
  truly
• 8:02
  right
• 8:02
  for
• 8:03
  me.
• 8:03
  I
• 8:03
  wanted
• 8:04
  it
• 8:04
  so
• 8:04
  bad
• 8:05
  I
• 8:05
  didn't
• 8:05
  wanna
• 8:05
  wait
• 8:06
  any
• 8:06
  longer.
• 8:07
  If
• 8:07
  you've
• 8:07
  ever
• 8:08
  been
• 8:08
  there
• 8:08
  or
• 8:09
  you
• 8:09
  are
• 8:09
  there
• 8:09
  now,
• 8:10
  please
• 8:11
  accept
• 8:11
  this
• 8:11
  virtual
• 8:12
  hug
• 8:13
  and
• 8:13
  know
• 8:13
  that
• 8:14
  there
• 8:14
  is
• 8:14
  so
• 8:15
  much
• 8:15
  more
• 8:15
  for
• 8:16
  you
• 8:16
  when
• 8:17
  you
• 8:17
  are
• 8:17
  truly
• 8:18
  ready
• 8:18
  to
• 8:19
  honor
• 8:19
  your
• 8:20
  standards.
• 8:22
  Accepting
• 8:22
  discomfort
• 8:23
  means
• 8:24
  accepting
• 8:24
  that
• 8:25
  chemistry
• 8:25
  without
• 8:26
  consistency
• 8:27
  is
• 8:28
  chaos,
• 8:29
  and
• 8:29
  chaos
• 8:30
  is
• 8:30
  not
• 8:30
  connection.
• 8:31
  I'm
• 8:32
  just
• 8:32
  gonna
• 8:32
  let
• 8:32
  that
• 8:33
  sit
• 8:33
  right
• 8:33
  here.
• 8:34
  Feel
• 8:34
  free
• 8:35
  to
• 8:35
  pause
• 8:36
  if
• 8:36
  you
• 8:36
  need
• 8:36
  a
• 8:36
  moment
• 8:37
  of
• 8:37
  silence.
• 8:39
  The
• 8:39
  N
• 8:40
  is
• 8:40
  for
• 8:40
  navigate
• 8:41
  the
• 8:41
  fallout
• 8:42
  when
• 8:42
  you
• 8:42
  choose
• 8:43
  patterns
• 8:44
  over
• 8:44
  potential,
• 8:45
  something
• 8:46
  shifts,
• 8:47
  sometimes
• 8:48
  the
• 8:48
  relationship
• 8:49
  does
• 8:49
  need
• 8:49
  to
• 8:50
  come
• 8:50
  to
• 8:50
  an
• 8:50
  end.
• 8:51
  Sometimes
• 8:51
  the
• 8:52
  dynamics
• 8:52
  change
• 8:53
  or
• 8:53
  access
• 8:54
  is
• 8:54
  reduced
• 8:55
  and
• 8:55
  your
• 8:55
  brain
• 8:56
  says,
• 8:56
  but
• 8:57
  what
• 8:57
  if
• 8:57
  they
• 8:57
  would've
• 8:58
  changed?
• 8:59
  See,
• 9:00
  now
• 9:00
  this
• 9:00
  is
• 9:01
  what
• 9:01
  I'm
• 9:01
  talking
• 9:01
  about
• 9:01
  right
• 9:01
  here.
• 9:02
  This
• 9:02
  is
• 9:03
  how
• 9:03
  potential
• 9:04
  tries
• 9:04
  to
• 9:04
  creep
• 9:05
  in.
• 9:05
  Girl,
• 9:06
  you
• 9:07
  may
• 9:07
  have
• 9:07
  better
• 9:07
  luck
• 9:08
  playing
• 9:08
  the
• 9:08
  slots
• 9:09
  in
• 9:09
  Vegas.
• 9:13
  If
• 9:13
  someone
• 9:14
  only
• 9:14
  becomes
• 9:15
  consistent
• 9:16
  when
• 9:16
  they
• 9:17
  feel
• 9:17
  like
• 9:17
  they're
• 9:17
  about
• 9:18
  to
• 9:18
  lose
• 9:18
  you,
• 9:19
  that's
• 9:19
  not
• 9:20
  a
• 9:20
  pattern.
• 9:21
  That's
• 9:21
  a
• 9:21
  panic
• 9:22
  response
• 9:23
  and
• 9:23
  panic
• 9:23
  is
• 9:23
  not
• 9:24
  the
• 9:24
  same
• 9:25
  as
• 9:25
  reliability.
• 9:26
  Real
• 9:27
  alignment
• 9:28
  doesn't
• 9:28
  require
• 9:29
  a
• 9:29
  threat.
• 9:30
  It
• 9:30
  shows
• 9:30
  up
• 9:31
  steady
• 9:31
  without
• 9:32
  ultimatum
• 9:33
  because
• 9:33
  what's
• 9:34
  built
• 9:35
  on
• 9:35
  adrenaline
• 9:36
  will
• 9:36
  always
• 9:37
  need
• 9:37
  a
• 9:37
  crisis
• 9:38
  to
• 9:38
  sustain
• 9:39
  it.
• 9:39
  And
• 9:39
  here
• 9:40
  we
• 9:40
  are
• 9:40
  at
• 9:41
  the
• 9:41
  D
• 9:41
  decide
• 9:42
  in
• 9:43
  alignment.
• 9:44
  This
• 9:45
  is
• 9:45
  the
• 9:45
  moment
• 9:45
  you
• 9:46
  decide
• 9:46
  I
• 9:47
  will
• 9:47
  no
• 9:47
  longer
• 9:48
  choose
• 9:48
  potential
• 9:49
  over
• 9:50
  patterns.
• 9:51
  You
• 9:51
  decide
• 9:52
  if
• 9:52
  the
• 9:52
  pattern
• 9:53
  doesn't
• 9:53
  match
• 9:53
  the
• 9:53
  standard.
• 9:54
  I
• 9:55
  move.
• 9:56
  No
• 9:57
  drama,
• 9:57
  no
• 9:57
  speeches
• 9:58
  or
• 9:58
  emotional
• 9:59
  theatrics,
• 10:00
  just
• 10:01
  alignment.
• 10:01
  And
• 10:02
  every
• 10:02
  time
• 10:03
  you
• 10:03
  do
• 10:03
  this,
• 10:04
  you
• 10:04
  build
• 10:04
  self-trust
• 10:06
  because
• 10:06
  self-trust
• 10:07
  is
• 10:07
  built
• 10:08
  when
• 10:08
  your
• 10:08
  decisions
• 10:09
  match
• 10:10
  your
• 10:11
  declared
• 10:11
  standards.
• 10:18
  This
• 10:18
  is
• 10:18
  the
• 10:18
  moment
• 10:19
  you
• 10:19
  decide
• 10:20
  that
• 10:20
  alignment
• 10:21
  matters
• 10:21
  more
• 10:22
  than
• 10:23
  attachment,
• 10:24
  because
• 10:24
  when
• 10:24
  you
• 10:24
  operate
• 10:25
  out
• 10:25
  of
• 10:26
  misalignment,
• 10:27
  you
• 10:27
  might
• 10:27
  gain
• 10:28
  something
• 10:28
  in
• 10:29
  the
• 10:29
  short
• 10:29
  term,
• 10:30
  but
• 10:30
  what
• 10:30
  you
• 10:31
  forfeit.
• 10:32
  Is
• 10:32
  something
• 10:33
  in
• 10:33
  the
• 10:34
  long
• 10:34
  term.
• 10:35
  And
• 10:35
  let
• 10:35
  me
• 10:36
  just
• 10:36
  say
• 10:36
  friend,
• 10:37
  when
• 10:37
  you
• 10:37
  settle
• 10:38
  for
• 10:38
  what
• 10:38
  is
• 10:39
  available
• 10:39
  now,
• 10:40
  instead
• 10:41
  of
• 10:41
  what
• 10:41
  aligns
• 10:42
  with
• 10:42
  who
• 10:42
  you
• 10:42
  are
• 10:42
  becoming,
• 10:44
  you
• 10:44
  are
• 10:44
  picking
• 10:45
  up
• 10:45
  a
• 10:45
  bill
• 10:45
  that
• 10:46
  costs
• 10:46
  Way
• 10:47
  too
• 10:47
  much.
• 10:48
  It
• 10:48
  costs
• 10:49
  you
• 10:49
  time,
• 10:50
  peace,
• 10:51
  self-trust,
• 10:52
  and
• 10:53
  it
• 10:53
  costs
• 10:53
  you
• 10:53
  capacity
• 10:55
  for
• 10:55
  what
• 10:55
  God
• 10:55
  is
• 10:56
  actually
• 10:56
  trying
• 10:57
  to
• 10:57
  send
• 10:57
  you.
• 10:58
  And
• 10:58
  the
• 10:58
  danger
• 10:58
  of
• 10:59
  misalignment
• 11:00
  is
• 11:00
  that
• 11:00
  it
• 11:00
  can
• 11:01
  look
• 11:01
  good
• 11:01
  enough,
• 11:02
  but
• 11:02
  good
• 11:03
  enough
• 11:03
  is
• 11:03
  expensive.
• 11:05
  When
• 11:05
  you
• 11:05
  were
• 11:05
  called
• 11:06
  to
• 11:06
  overflow,
• 11:08
  God
• 11:08
  does
• 11:09
  not
• 11:09
  bless.
• 11:09
  Shrinking.
• 11:11
  He
• 11:11
  blesses
• 11:12
  alignment
• 11:13
  and
• 11:13
  the
• 11:13
  kind
• 11:14
  of
• 11:14
  love
• 11:14
  you
• 11:14
  say
• 11:15
  you
• 11:16
  want
• 11:16
  that
• 11:16
  steady,
• 11:17
  abundant,
• 11:18
  peaceful,
• 11:18
  secure
• 11:19
  kind.
• 11:20
  That
• 11:21
  kind
• 11:21
  of
• 11:21
  love
• 11:21
  is
• 11:22
  not
• 11:22
  built
• 11:22
  on
• 11:23
  potential.
• 11:23
  It's
• 11:24
  built
• 11:24
  on
• 11:25
  pattern,
• 11:25
  character
• 11:27
  and
• 11:27
  on
• 11:27
  alignment.
• 11:28
  You
• 11:29
  deserve
• 11:30
  the
• 11:30
  kind
• 11:30
  of
• 11:30
  love
• 11:31
  that
• 11:31
  overflows,
• 11:32
  the
• 11:33
  kind
• 11:33
  that
• 11:33
  feels
• 11:34
  like
• 11:34
  a
• 11:34
  reflection
• 11:35
  of
• 11:35
  God's
• 11:36
  love,
• 11:36
  steady,
• 11:37
  intentional,
• 11:39
  unwavering,
• 11:40
  but
• 11:40
  you
• 11:41
  cannot
• 11:41
  receive
• 11:42
  overflow
• 11:43
  if
• 11:43
  you
• 11:43
  keep
• 11:43
  settling
• 11:44
  for
• 11:44
  almost.
• 11:45
  See,
• 11:46
  this
• 11:46
  is
• 11:46
  why
• 11:47
  Brandy
• 11:47
  tried
• 11:48
  to
• 11:48
  tell
• 11:48
  us.
• 11:49
  Everybody
• 11:49
  knows
• 11:50
  almost
• 11:51
  doesn't
• 11:51
  count.
• 11:56
  Alignment
• 11:56
  requires
• 11:57
  faith.
• 11:58
  Faith
• 11:59
  that
• 11:59
  what
• 11:59
  you
• 12:00
  walk
• 12:00
  away
• 12:00
  from
• 12:01
  is
• 12:01
  not
• 12:02
  greater
• 12:03
  than
• 12:04
  what
• 12:04
  you
• 12:04
  are
• 12:04
  being
• 12:04
  prepared
• 12:05
  for
• 12:06
  When
• 12:06
  you
• 12:06
  stand,
• 12:07
  you
• 12:08
  are
• 12:08
  not
• 12:08
  enforcing
• 12:09
  a
• 12:10
  boundary.
• 12:11
  You
• 12:11
  are
• 12:11
  honoring
• 12:12
  the
• 12:12
  promise,
• 12:13
  and
• 12:14
  that
• 12:14
  is
• 12:15
  worth
• 12:15
  the
• 12:15
  cost.
• 12:18
  Okay,
• 12:19
  friend,
• 12:19
  can
• 12:19
  I
• 12:19
  fill
• 12:20
  you
• 12:20
  in
• 12:20
  on
• 12:20
  something?
• 12:20
  I
• 12:21
  had
• 12:21
  to
• 12:21
  learn
• 12:21
  the
• 12:21
  hard
• 12:22
  way,
• 12:22
  and
• 12:22
  there
• 12:23
  was
• 12:23
  a
• 12:23
  season
• 12:23
  when
• 12:24
  I
• 12:24
  understood
• 12:24
  pretty
• 12:25
  much
• 12:25
  everything
• 12:25
  about
• 12:26
  myself,
• 12:26
  and
• 12:27
  yet
• 12:28
  nothing
• 12:28
  in
• 12:28
  my
• 12:28
  life
• 12:29
  was
• 12:29
  changing.
• 12:30
  If
• 12:30
  that
• 12:30
  feels
• 12:31
  like
• 12:31
  you
• 12:31
  right
• 12:31
  now,
• 12:32
  listen,
• 12:33
  you
• 12:33
  are
• 12:33
  not
• 12:33
  stuck.
• 12:34
  Or
• 12:34
  broken.
• 12:35
  You
• 12:35
  are
• 12:35
  just
• 12:36
  past
• 12:36
  the
• 12:36
  point
• 12:37
  where
• 12:37
  more
• 12:38
  awareness
• 12:39
  actually
• 12:39
  helps.
• 12:40
  At
• 12:40
  this
• 12:41
  stage,
• 12:41
  insight
• 12:42
  won't
• 12:42
  move
• 12:42
  you,
• 12:43
  but
• 12:43
  decision
• 12:44
  definitely
• 12:45
  will
• 12:46
  that
• 12:46
  pause.
• 12:46
  You
• 12:47
  keep
• 12:47
  calling
• 12:47
  timing.
• 12:48
  That's
• 12:49
  the
• 12:49
  moment
• 12:49
  where
• 12:49
  self-trust
• 12:50
  gets
• 12:50
  built.
• 12:51
  That's
• 12:52
  exactly
• 12:52
  why
• 12:53
  I
• 12:53
  created
• 12:54
  the
• 12:54
  main
• 12:54
  character
• 12:55
  Momentum
• 12:55
  Builder
• 12:56
  to
• 12:56
  help
• 12:56
  you
• 12:57
  move
• 12:57
  before
• 12:58
  you
• 12:58
  are
• 12:58
  ready
• 12:59
  without
• 12:59
  forcing
• 13:00
  yourself
• 13:00
  and
• 13:01
  without
• 13:02
  waiting
• 13:02
  on
• 13:03
  confidence.
• 13:03
  To
• 13:03
  catch
• 13:04
  up
• 13:04
  if
• 13:05
  you
• 13:05
  are
• 13:05
  ready
• 13:06
  to
• 13:06
  stop
• 13:06
  circling
• 13:07
  and
• 13:07
  start
• 13:07
  moving,
• 13:08
  like
• 13:08
  someone
• 13:08
  who
• 13:08
  trusts
• 13:09
  herself.
• 13:10
  It's
• 13:10
  waiting
• 13:10
  for
• 13:11
  you
• 13:11
  in
• 13:11
  the
• 13:11
  show
• 13:12
  notes.
• 13:14
  Okay
• 13:15
  friend.
• 13:15
  Before
• 13:16
  you
• 13:17
  stand,
• 13:18
  you
• 13:18
  have
• 13:18
  to
• 13:19
  see
• 13:19
  clearly.
• 13:20
  And
• 13:20
  most
• 13:21
  of
• 13:21
  the
• 13:21
  time
• 13:22
  we
• 13:22
  don't
• 13:22
  struggle
• 13:23
  with
• 13:23
  enforcing
• 13:24
  standards.
• 13:25
  We
• 13:25
  struggle
• 13:25
  with
• 13:26
  admitting
• 13:27
  what
• 13:27
  the
• 13:27
  pattern
• 13:28
  actually
• 13:29
  is.
• 13:29
  So
• 13:30
  instead
• 13:30
  of
• 13:30
  reacting
• 13:31
  emotionally,
• 13:32
  we're
• 13:32
  gonna
• 13:33
  respond
• 13:34
  strategically
• 13:35
  because
• 13:35
  Queens
• 13:36
  don't
• 13:37
  argue
• 13:37
  with
• 13:37
  patterns,
• 13:38
  they
• 13:38
  audit
• 13:39
  them.
• 13:39
  This
• 13:40
  self
• 13:40
  love
• 13:40
  two
• 13:41
  step
• 13:41
  is
• 13:41
  called
• 13:42
  the
• 13:42
  pattern
• 13:43
  audit.
• 13:43
  This
• 13:44
  one
• 13:44
  is
• 13:45
  the
• 13:45
  grown
• 13:45
  woman
• 13:46
  kind
• 13:46
  of
• 13:46
  work.
• 13:47
  Okay?
• 13:47
  Step
• 13:48
  one,
• 13:49
  audit
• 13:49
  the
• 13:49
  pattern.
• 13:50
  Pick
• 13:50
  one
• 13:51
  relationship
• 13:52
  or
• 13:52
  situation
• 13:53
  and
• 13:54
  ask
• 13:55
  what
• 13:55
  is
• 13:55
  the
• 13:55
  repeated
• 13:56
  behavior?
• 13:57
  How
• 13:58
  often
• 13:58
  does
• 13:59
  it
• 13:59
  occur,
• 14:00
  and
• 14:00
  how
• 14:00
  do
• 14:00
  I
• 14:01
  consistently
• 14:02
  feel?
• 14:02
  Patterns
• 14:03
  are
• 14:03
  factual.
• 14:05
  Step
• 14:05
  two,
• 14:06
  adjust
• 14:07
  to
• 14:07
  the
• 14:07
  pattern.
• 14:08
  Instead
• 14:09
  of
• 14:09
  asking
• 14:10
  them
• 14:10
  to
• 14:10
  change,
• 14:11
  change
• 14:12
  your
• 14:12
  response.
• 14:13
  This
• 14:13
  is
• 14:14
  such
• 14:14
  a
• 14:14
  crucial
• 14:15
  step,
• 14:15
  friend.
• 14:15
  Please
• 14:16
  don't
• 14:16
  pass
• 14:16
  this.
• 14:17
  If
• 14:17
  the
• 14:17
  pattern
• 14:18
  is
• 14:18
  inconsistency.
• 14:20
  Reduce
• 14:21
  access
• 14:22
  if
• 14:22
  the
• 14:22
  pattern
• 14:23
  is
• 14:23
  disrespect.
• 14:24
  Withdraw
• 14:25
  availability
• 14:26
  if
• 14:27
  the
• 14:27
  pattern
• 14:27
  is
• 14:28
  emotional
• 14:29
  immaturity.
• 14:30
  Stop
• 14:30
  over
• 14:31
  explaining
• 14:32
  boundaries.
• 14:32
  Respond
• 14:33
  to
• 14:34
  patterns.
• 14:34
  They
• 14:35
  do
• 14:35
  not
• 14:35
  argue
• 14:36
  with
• 14:36
  them.
• 14:36
  this
• 14:37
  two
• 14:37
  step
• 14:37
  matters
• 14:38
  so
• 14:38
  much
• 14:39
  because
• 14:39
  what
• 14:39
  you
• 14:39
  tolerate
• 14:40
  repeatedly
• 14:41
  becomes
• 14:42
  what
• 14:42
  you
• 14:43
  normalize
• 14:44
  and
• 14:44
  what
• 14:45
  you
• 14:45
  normalize
• 14:46
  becomes
• 14:47
  what
• 14:47
  you
• 14:47
  build
• 14:48
  your
• 14:48
  life
• 14:49
  around.
• 14:50
  If
• 14:50
  you
• 14:50
  misread
• 14:51
  the
• 14:51
  pattern,
• 14:52
  you
• 14:53
  misalign
• 14:53
  your
• 14:54
  future,
• 14:55
  and
• 14:55
  not
• 14:55
  that
• 14:55
  you
• 14:55
  can't
• 14:56
  still
• 14:56
  get
• 14:56
  to
• 14:57
  your
• 14:57
  desire
• 14:58
  destination
• 14:59
  from
• 14:59
  there,
• 15:00
  but
• 15:01
  why
• 15:01
  take
• 15:01
  the
• 15:01
  long
• 15:02
  route
• 15:02
  when
• 15:02
  you
• 15:03
  can
• 15:03
  take
• 15:03
  the
• 15:04
  expressway?
• 15:05
  Because
• 15:05
  we
• 15:06
  are
• 15:06
  not
• 15:06
  building
• 15:07
  a
• 15:07
  life
• 15:08
  on
• 15:08
  misread
• 15:09
  data
• 15:09
  anymore.
• 15:10
  We
• 15:11
  are
• 15:11
  building
• 15:11
  on
• 15:12
  truth.
• 15:13
  Now
• 15:14
  lemme
• 15:14
  pour
• 15:14
  into
• 15:15
  you
• 15:15
  real
• 15:15
  quick.
• 15:16
  This
• 15:16
  is
• 15:17
  the
• 15:17
  part
• 15:17
  of
• 15:17
  the
• 15:17
  show
• 15:17
  that
• 15:18
  I
• 15:18
  love
• 15:19
  where
• 15:19
  I
• 15:20
  speak
• 15:20
  to
• 15:20
  the
• 15:20
  queen
• 15:21
  in
• 15:21
  you.
• 15:23
  Yes,
• 15:23
  queen.
• 15:24
  That's
• 15:24
  you.
• 15:25
  Come
• 15:25
  on
• 15:25
  up
• 15:26
  front
• 15:26
  and
• 15:26
  center.
• 15:27
  Hear
• 15:28
  me
• 15:28
  with
• 15:28
  your
• 15:29
  whole
• 15:29
  heart
• 15:30
  when
• 15:30
  I
• 15:30
  say
• 15:30
  this.
• 15:31
  You
• 15:32
  have
• 15:32
  simply
• 15:33
  been
• 15:34
  hopeful
• 15:35
  and
• 15:35
  hope
• 15:36
  is
• 15:37
  beautiful,
• 15:38
  but
• 15:38
  hope
• 15:39
  without
• 15:39
  discernment
• 15:40
  will
• 15:41
  have
• 15:41
  you
• 15:41
  pouring
• 15:41
  into
• 15:42
  places
• 15:43
  that
• 15:43
  were
• 15:43
  never
• 15:44
  assigned
• 15:45
  to
• 15:45
  you,
• 15:46
  queen.
• 15:46
  You
• 15:47
  do
• 15:47
  not
• 15:48
  have
• 15:48
  to
• 15:48
  shrink
• 15:49
  to
• 15:49
  be
• 15:49
  chosen.
• 15:50
  You
• 15:50
  do
• 15:51
  not
• 15:51
  have
• 15:51
  to
• 15:51
  audition
• 15:52
  for
• 15:52
  consistency.
• 15:54
  You
• 15:54
  do
• 15:54
  not
• 15:54
  have
• 15:55
  to
• 15:55
  convince.
• 15:56
  Someone
• 15:57
  to
• 15:57
  rise
• 15:58
  to
• 15:58
  the
• 15:58
  standard
• 15:59
  you
• 15:59
  already
• 16:00
  live
• 16:00
  by.
• 16:01
  You
• 16:01
  are
• 16:01
  not
• 16:02
  bad
• 16:02
  at
• 16:03
  choosing.
• 16:04
  You
• 16:04
  are
• 16:04
  not
• 16:04
  naive,
• 16:05
  and
• 16:05
  you're
• 16:06
  not
• 16:06
  crazy
• 16:06
  for
• 16:07
  seeing
• 16:07
  the
• 16:07
  good
• 16:08
  in
• 16:08
  someone.
• 16:09
  You
• 16:10
  are
• 16:10
  discerning.
• 16:11
  But
• 16:11
  somewhere
• 16:12
  along
• 16:13
  the
• 16:13
  way,
• 16:13
  you
• 16:14
  started
• 16:14
  overriding
• 16:16
  your
• 16:16
  discernment.
• 16:17
  With
• 16:17
  your
• 16:18
  desire,
• 16:19
  and
• 16:19
  that
• 16:19
  doesn't
• 16:20
  make
• 16:20
  you
• 16:20
  weak,
• 16:21
  it
• 16:21
  makes
• 16:22
  you
• 16:22
  human.
• 16:23
  You
• 16:23
  saw
• 16:23
  potential
• 16:24
  possibility,
• 16:26
  you
• 16:26
  saw
• 16:27
  what
• 16:27
  it
• 16:27
  could
• 16:27
  be.
• 16:28
  But
• 16:28
  Queen,
• 16:29
  you
• 16:30
  cannot
• 16:30
  build
• 16:31
  a
• 16:31
  life
• 16:32
  on
• 16:32
  what
• 16:32
  could
• 16:33
  be.
• 16:33
  You
• 16:34
  build
• 16:34
  a
• 16:34
  life
• 16:35
  on
• 16:35
  what
• 16:35
  consistently
• 16:37
  is.
• 16:38
  You
• 16:38
  do
• 16:38
  not
• 16:38
  struggle
• 16:39
  with
• 16:39
  standards.
• 16:40
  You
• 16:41
  struggle
• 16:41
  with
• 16:41
  giving
• 16:42
  grace
• 16:42
  beyond
• 16:43
  the
• 16:44
  pattern.
• 16:45
  And
• 16:45
  grace
• 16:45
  is
• 16:45
  beautiful.
• 16:46
  You
• 16:46
  know
• 16:47
  that.
• 16:47
  We
• 16:47
  talk
• 16:48
  about
• 16:48
  it
• 16:48
  all
• 16:48
  the
• 16:48
  time,
• 16:49
  Grace
• 16:50
  is
• 16:50
  beautiful
• 16:51
  until
• 16:51
  it
• 16:52
  becomes
• 16:52
  self
• 16:53
  abandonment.
• 16:54
  You
• 16:54
  do
• 16:55
  not
• 16:55
  need
• 16:55
  to
• 16:55
  gather
• 16:56
  more
• 16:56
  data.
• 16:57
  Have
• 16:57
  not
• 16:57
  one
• 16:58
  more
• 16:58
  conversation.
• 16:59
  You
• 16:59
  don't
• 17:00
  need,
• 17:00
  not
• 17:01
  one
• 17:01
  more
• 17:01
  sign.
• 17:02
  Okay.
• 17:04
  The
• 17:05
  pattern
• 17:05
  has
• 17:06
  already
• 17:06
  spoken
• 17:07
  and
• 17:07
  deep
• 17:07
  down
• 17:08
  you
• 17:09
  know
• 17:09
  it.
• 17:10
  You
• 17:10
  are
• 17:10
  not
• 17:11
  called
• 17:12
  to
• 17:12
  fix
• 17:12
  potential.
• 17:13
  You
• 17:14
  are
• 17:14
  called
• 17:15
  to
• 17:15
  align
• 17:16
  with
• 17:16
  provision
• 17:17
  and
• 17:18
  that
• 17:18
  kind
• 17:18
  of
• 17:18
  love
• 17:19
  that
• 17:19
  reflects
• 17:20
  God's
• 17:20
  heart
• 17:20
  towards
• 17:21
  you
• 17:22
  will
• 17:22
  not
• 17:22
  require
• 17:23
  you
• 17:23
  to
• 17:24
  shrink
• 17:24
  your
• 17:24
  expectations.
• 17:25
  To
• 17:26
  receive
• 17:26
  it.
• 17:27
  It
• 17:27
  will
• 17:27
  meet
• 17:28
  you
• 17:28
  at
• 17:28
  the
• 17:29
  standard
• 17:29
  you
• 17:30
  live
• 17:30
  by,
• 17:31
  so
• 17:31
  stop
• 17:31
  negotiating
• 17:32
  your
• 17:33
  knowing.
• 17:34
  Stop
• 17:34
  overriding
• 17:35
  your
• 17:35
  intuition
• 17:36
  for
• 17:36
  temporary
• 17:37
  comfort.
• 17:38
  You
• 17:38
  are
• 17:38
  not
• 17:39
  too
• 17:39
  intense.
• 17:40
  You
• 17:40
  are
• 17:41
  calibrated
• 17:42
  for
• 17:42
  overflow
• 17:43
  and
• 17:44
  overflow.
• 17:44
  Does
• 17:45
  not
• 17:45
  chase.
• 17:46
  It
• 17:46
  attracts
• 17:47
  stand
• 17:49
  in
• 17:49
  who
• 17:49
  you
• 17:50
  are
• 17:50
  becoming
• 17:51
  because
• 17:51
  the
• 17:51
  woman
• 17:52
  you
• 17:52
  are
• 17:52
  growing
• 17:52
  into
• 17:53
  does
• 17:54
  not
• 17:54
  argue
• 17:55
  with
• 17:55
  patterns.
• 17:56
  She
• 17:56
  adjusts
• 17:57
  access.
• 17:58
  Now,
• 17:59
  straighten
• 17:59
  your
• 17:59
  posture
• 18:00
  and
• 18:01
  position
• 18:01
  your
• 18:01
  crown
• 18:02
  because
• 18:02
  that
• 18:03
  crown
• 18:03
  doesn't
• 18:04
  tilt
• 18:04
  for
• 18:05
  inconsistency.
• 18:06
  Okay?
• 18:07
  Okay.
• 18:08
  Friend.
• 18:09
  There
• 18:09
  will
• 18:09
  be
• 18:09
  another
• 18:10
  moment,
• 18:11
  another
• 18:11
  test.
• 18:12
  Another
• 18:13
  temptation,
• 18:14
  another
• 18:15
  almost.
• 18:16
  And
• 18:16
  when
• 18:16
  it
• 18:16
  comes,
• 18:17
  I
• 18:17
  don't
• 18:17
  want
• 18:18
  you
• 18:18
  asking,
• 18:19
  is
• 18:19
  this
• 18:19
  too
• 18:19
  much?
• 18:20
  I
• 18:20
  want
• 18:21
  you
• 18:21
  asking,
• 18:22
  does
• 18:22
  this
• 18:23
  match
• 18:23
  the
• 18:23
  woman
• 18:24
  I'm
• 18:24
  becoming?
• 18:25
  Will
• 18:26
  this
• 18:26
  support
• 18:27
  her?
• 18:28
  Standards
• 18:29
  are
• 18:29
  not
• 18:29
  walls.
• 18:30
  They
• 18:31
  are
• 18:31
  filters.
• 18:32
  And
• 18:32
  when
• 18:32
  you
• 18:33
  stand,
• 18:34
  what
• 18:34
  remains
• 18:35
  is
• 18:35
  what
• 18:36
  aligns.
• 18:37
  The
• 18:37
  moment
• 18:38
  your
• 18:38
  standards
• 18:39
  cost
• 18:39
  you
• 18:39
  something
• 18:40
  is
• 18:40
  not
• 18:41
  the
• 18:41
  moment
• 18:41
  you
• 18:41
  lose.
• 18:42
  It's
• 18:43
  the
• 18:43
  moment
• 18:43
  you
• 18:43
  level
• 18:44
  up.
• 18:44
  And
• 18:45
  that
• 18:46
  is
• 18:46
  integrity
• 18:47
  in
• 18:47
  motion.
• 18:50
  Ooh,
• 18:51
  friend.
• 18:51
  This
• 18:52
  episode
• 18:53
  right
• 18:53
  here.
• 18:53
  Ooh,
• 18:54
  this
• 18:54
  might
• 18:54
  be
• 18:54
  my
• 18:54
  favorite
• 18:55
  in
• 18:55
  the
• 18:55
  series.
• 18:56
  Okay.
• 18:58
  If
• 18:58
  this
• 18:59
  episode
• 18:59
  met
• 19:00
  you
• 19:00
  where
• 19:00
  you
• 19:00
  are,
• 19:01
  share
• 19:02
  it,
• 19:02
  save
• 19:03
  it,
• 19:03
  and
• 19:03
  revisit
• 19:04
  it
• 19:04
  When
• 19:04
  the
• 19:05
  test
• 19:05
  shows
• 19:06
  up,
• 19:06
  you
• 19:07
  are
• 19:07
  not
• 19:07
  waiting
• 19:07
  for
• 19:08
  better.
• 19:08
  You
• 19:09
  are
• 19:09
  becoming
• 19:09
  aligned
• 19:10
  for
• 19:11
  it.
• 19:11
  And
• 19:12
  remember,
• 19:12
  being
• 19:13
  confident
• 19:13
  enough
• 19:14
  to
• 19:14
  disappoint
• 19:14
  might
• 19:14
  be
• 19:16
  the
• 19:16
  most
• 19:16
  loving
• 19:17
  thing
• 19:17
  you
• 19:17
  ever
• 19:18
  do
• 19:18
  because
• 19:19
  every
• 19:19
  time
• 19:20
  you
• 19:20
  choose
• 19:20
  alignment.
• 19:21
  Over
• 19:22
  attachment.
• 19:23
  You
• 19:24
  strengthen
• 19:24
  the
• 19:24
  belief
• 19:25
  that
• 19:25
  you
• 19:26
  can
• 19:26
  trust
• 19:27
  yourself.
• 19:28
  The
• 19:28
  moment
• 19:28
  you
• 19:29
  reconnect
• 19:29
  to
• 19:29
  your
• 19:30
  standard
• 19:31
  self-Trust
• 19:32
  deepens.
• 19:33
  Stay
• 19:34
  unavailable
• 19:35
  for
• 19:35
  self
• 19:35
  abandonment.
• 19:36
  Stand
• 19:38
  and
• 19:38
  I'll
• 19:39
  be
• 19:39
  right
• 19:39
  here
• 19:40
  when
• 19:40
  you
• 19:40
  do.